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A battle with an unknown enemy

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Joshua Malapitan

They say, our mind is one of the most powerful weapons a man can have that even guns and swords couldn’t defeat. But what if the one you thought will be your greatest armor appears to be your own enemy?

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It’s really hard to combat something, especially when we couldn’t even see the enemy through our naked eyes. Apart from that, it is certifiably more difficult if the problem is in our own thinking. Oftentimes, we take these mental illnesses as something not to worry about, however those people who struggle to survive every day due to their psychological instability are a different story. They may look fine physically when in a company or in public, yet inside their system is something they couldn’t control. Rapid heartbeats, unusual shaking and bouncing of a leg, and being paranoid are some of the symptoms of their attacks. Sometimes we make jokes about these things although it is not in our intention to hurt. Still, we are insensitive for laughing at the misfortunes of others.

Personally, I have been through a lot of emotional and psychological stresses in the past that took me to a point where it already hampered my time, focus, and productivity. At first, I was in denial thinking that this is not serious but symptoms kept on recurring for months. It was then when I realized that there is something wrong with me. I never talked to anyone about this only because I don’t want to be a burden; so I tried to live like nothing is happening when I am with others.

After all, I was wrong. I should’ve not kept it all to myself. Hiding what you feel adds fuel to that burning system inside. It wouldn’t help you either if you could escape that imprisonment. Seeking help is not and will never be a manifestation of weakness. We can’t survive life all by ourselves; there are certain situations where someone is needed to endure life.

Waves in the ocean aren’t constantly calm, at times it can be rough but that does not mean the whole voyage is a failure. So is life, it isn’t all about euphorias and that it’s valid not to feel okay for as long as we know how to acknowledge and accept our weaknesses— we can win a battle.

Part IV The Hours of Midnight, Dusk, and Dawn

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