You Are Not Alone by Jennifer Jolley

Jennifer Jolley You Are Not Alone for flute, clarinet, violin, violoncello, and piano

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Instrumentation Flute B-flat Clarinet Violin Violoncello Piano

Performance Notes • There is speaking throughout this work. Every fragment of text should be spoken approximately where placed above the measure. Ideally each performer will be miked so they can be heard. • All performers will be playing finger cymbals during the first movement. If needed, they can be provided by the composer.

Program Notes The story behind the piece co-composed with Jennifer Jolley and I for The Big SCORE, or Why Scott Wasn't On Stage. The deal was I’d write a poem and Jennifer would compose a piece to/for/around/alongside it, whatever we came up with. At our first meeting, we basically fumbled around graciously, trying to accommodate each other with statements like, “Whatever you’d like it to be” and “I really respect you so much, so whatever you want to do.” Finally I asked her if there was anything she was particularly invested in at the moment, and she said the #MeToo movement. And that was it. I was doing a #MeToo poem, end of discussion. Months later, I sent her the poem and said if there is a word of it that you cannot stand behind 100%, let's change it. It didn't even have a proper title. My only stipulation was that if we could get around having me perform it, we should, because women should have as much agency as we could manage with the performance. The ensemble was 90% women musicians, performing a piece composed by a woman, in a concert in part conceived and produced by a woman (Zoe Borresen Johnstone), doing a piece about the #MeToo movement. No way was I standing on stage with all of that glorious moment to be shared mansplaining all night. Jennifer took the poem and came back months later with a recording that blew my mind away. And the rest is her-story. —Scott Woods

I was asked by both Jack and Zoe Johnstone and the Women Composers Festival of Hartford to write a new chamber piece for them. The Johnstones set me up with writer Scott Woods and the Women Composers Festival had me working with The Nouveau Classical Project. Both Scott and I write about subjects that are political (which is probably why Jack and Zoe paired us together), so we brainstormed what kind of piece we would write together. It was around this time that Christine Blasey Ford gave her statement on how Brett Kavanaugh sexually assaulted her when they were teenagers. For my own well-being I couldn’t watch or listen to the hearings. I told Scott that these hearings deflated and dehumanized me to my core. I couldn’t understand why women are not believed. Why do we women have to quantify our experiences and prove our human worth? And with this in mind, Scott wrote his poem.

—Jennifer Jolley Cover photo 2017.01.21 Women's March Washington, DC USA 00094 by Ted Eytan. [https://www.flickr.com/photos/taedc/32402473986]

You Are Not Alone by Scott Woods 1. You are not alone. We want this to ring in the temple of one voice, a choir of one throat, But in the trenches of empire it only explodes, only burns, an echo in robes, the uniform of the quietest war ever fought, the raiment of a religion of whispering no. You are not alone and are utterly alone at once, and twice, someone told you you were beautiful and should smile more and it was a sermon like a branding iron on your cheek. 2. You have proven you have no idea what no means so let us discuss yes. Let us discuss space and who it belongs to Let us discuss the yes of mornings spent in eyes. Let us discuss the slick of yes, the craning neck to see the yes born of you, the yes grown from you like a knowing hibiscus filled with the wines of yes in its roselle cups. Let us discuss the phases of yes like a new moon that does not know its orbit or name. Then let us discuss it all like we do not know anything about ourselves. Explain it to us again. Yes, once more. Let us discuss how the way we speak to this is all between-channel static and noise made white from scrubbing away its truth until it gleamed with agenda and circumstance and all the blindness of the hungry score.

3. Let us peel back that moment, when you said what you said and did what you did, take the onion skin down to rind, down to tear and salt suck and the umami of a braised ego. Peel and peel again to the quick, to the meat, to the heart, to the time when you were where you want me to be when you were what you want me to be a divining rod that only knows the heat of no, when you were me too and you hid it, kept it like a ring of Hell on your finger, married it, live with it, growing in hate with it, seeing it as you see them all now. There is no Virgil to guide you, no Charon coin needed to cross. When all the world bends to you you need no guide, no tour, no path. Everywhere you step is the way of man, and man is in every step of the way.â&#x20AC;¨ 4. Let us walk into the place where every man is a missile and a landmine and a river of species and kiss and clutching. Let us walk into the armory of patriarchy and pick petals from its bullet belts and treads mottled with the open arms of all the women it has conquered. Let us walk there, now, tomorrow. You can never be late. Let us walk anywhere. You can never be late to a place that is always open, That is always working. A minefield never sleeps.

Commissioned by The Johnstone Fund for New Music and the Women Composers Festival of Hartford in honor of its 19th annual festival Duration: 10 minutes ÂŠ 2019 by Jennifer Jolley (BMI) All Rights Reserved www.jenniferjolley.com

Commissioned by the Johnstone Fund for New Music and the Women Composers Festival ofHartford in honor ofits 19th annual festival

Transposed Score

Yo r No lon

Poe b Scot Wood

q = 63

U œ

You are not alone.

U œ

U ∑

You are not alone.

U œ

U ∑

You are not alone.

U œ

U ∑

U ∑ U ∑

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U ∑

Finger Cymbals Vln.

Finger Cymbals Vc.

q = 63

{

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Pno.

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pedal eely

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F. Cym. Fl.

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# #You are not alone. &#

Piano

We want this to ring in the temple of one voice,

You are not alone.

Finger Cymbals Fl.

Jennifer Jolle

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U ∑ it only explodes, only

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U ∑ burns, an echo in robes,

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the uniform of the quietest war ever fought, F. Cym. Fl.

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the raiment of a religion

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of whispering

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and are utterly alone at once,

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U ∑ someone told you

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you were beautiful and should smile more U

∑

and it was a sermon like a branding iron on your cheek.

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q = 84

Flute

so let us discuss YES.

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Violin

U ∑

Violoncello

q = 84 Piano

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so let us discuss YES.

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the yes grown from you

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like a knowing hibiscus ﬁlled with

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the wines of yes in its roselle cups.

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Pno.

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{

that does not know its orbit or name.

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w w w w 25

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wb &b p

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Yes, once more.

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Let us discuss how the way we speak to this

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is all between channel static

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w > from scrubbing away its truth

and noise made white

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and all the blindness

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of the hungry score.

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q = 60 Flute

3 &4

∑

Clarinet in Bb

3 &4

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Violin

3 &4

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Violoncello

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q = 60 “” 3˙ &4

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when you said what you said

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and did what you did,

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bœO

œO

Oœ

bœO

œO

nœO

Oœ

œO

bœO

œO

Ȯ

“” & ˙

Pno.

take the onion skin down to rind,

œ 9

down to tear and salt suck the umami of a braised ego. Fl.

∑

Peal and peal again to the quick, Cl.

Vln.

∑

Ȯ & n

Oœ

∑

bœO

œO

Ȯ ™™

Vc.

? Ȯ n

œO

bœO

œO

Ȯ ™™

“” #˙

#˙

#œ

& #˙

#˙

#œ

Pno.

œO

{

#œ

Fl.

Cl.

Vln.

Vc.

Pno.

to the meat,

to the heart,

to the time...

to the meat,

to the heart,

to the time when you when you were where you were peeled away, want me to be

∑

& & bœO

œO

nOœ

Oœ

Ȯ

bœO

œO

Oœ

nOœ

œO

bœO

œO

nœO

Oœ

œO

Ȯ

bœO

œO

nœO

“” & œ

œO

& œO ?

{

& œ

œ 17

˙ 18

when you were what you want me to be Fl.

when you were me too...

∑

a divining rod that only knows the heat of no, Cl.

Vln.

when you were me too and you hid it,

kept it like a ring of Hell on your ﬁnger,

∑

& O & œ

Oœ

bœO

Ȯ

œO

Ȯ

œO

Ȯ

Vc.

? O œ

{

œO

bœO

Ȯ

#œ

œ #œ

#˙

#œ

œ #œ

#˙

married it, Fl.

Vln.

Vc.

∑

& bœO

Pno.

{

growing in hate with it,

bœO

“” œ

nOœ

Oœ

œO

bœO

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nȮ

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nœO

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bœO

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n Ȯ

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#œ #œ

˙ p

them all now. Cl.

seeing it as you see

∑

growing in hate with it, live with it,

Cl.

œO

“” & œ

Pno.

œO

∑

U ∑

4 4

Vln.

O & œ

Oœ

Oœ b O œ

œO

∑

U ∑

4 4

Vc.

? O œ

œO

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œO

∑

U ∑

4 4

œ œ #˙

U ∑

4 4

U ∑

4 4

“” & œ œ œ

Pno.

{

œ œ œ

#˙

œ #œ œ

#˙

œ #œ œ

œ œ

œ œ #˙ 32

14 Fl.

vibrato 34 senza œo œo 4 &4

œo

#-œ

-œ

œ-

œ vib. œ 4 senza &4

œo

˙o

œo

#œ-

˙-

#œ-

œ-

œo

p senza vibrato

Cl.

4 &4 œ p

con sord.

Vln.

œ-

œœ

Vc.

? 44

There is no virgil to guide you,

no Charon coin needed to cross.

When all the world bends to you

œo Fl.

Cl.

& œ -

Vln.

& œ

Vc.

œo

˙o

œo

œ-

#˙-

œ-

#œ-

you need no guide, no tour, no path.

œo

œ-

Everywhere you step is the way of man,

œo

#œ œ

œo

Fl.

Cl.

& œ-

œ-

#-œ

-œ

Vln.

& œ

œo

œ-

and man is in every step of the way.

rit. œo

œo

˙o

U wo

˙-

U #w-

U w 42

q = 80

& w-

Flute

#˙

#w-

#˙

& w p

Clarinet in Bb

senza sord.

& w

Violin

? w

Violoncello

every man is a Let us walk into the place missle and a landmine and a where

q = 80 Piano

& w w p ? w w

river of species and kiss and clutching.

w w w w

{

w w

#˙ w

w w

#w #w

5 Fl.

& w-

#w-

Cl.

& w -

# w-

Vln.

& w

#˙

? w

and pick petals from its bullet belts and treads

mottled with the open arms of all the women

w w w w

Vc.

Pno.

Let us walk into into the armory of patriarchy

& nw w

{

? w w 5

#˙

it has conquered.

#˙ #w #w #w

#˙ 8

rit.

9 Fl.

& w ppsubito

Cl.

ww-

& w

? nw

### #

ppsubito

Vc.

ppsubito

Vln.

ppsubito

9 Pno.

rit.

& w w ppsubito ? nw nw

{

w w

# # 12

13 A tempo q = 80 Fl.

# w-

now, tomorrow.

You can never be late.

Let us walk anywhere.

w w

p cresc.

Cl.

## & #

p cresc.

Vln.

# p cresc.

Vc.

w p cresc.

A tempo q = 80

Pno.

13 Let us walk there, # & w w p cresc. ?# w w

{

19 Fl.

˙™

Cl.

œ-

-œ

cresc.

## & # w

˙™

cresc.

Vln.

˙™

cresc.

Vc.

˙™

19 # w w

˙™ ˙™

?# w w

˙™ ˙™

Pno.

{

œ œcresc. œ œ-

You can never be late

to a place that is always open,

w w

Fl.

Cl.

Vln.

## & # w -

-œ

˙™

wmf

˙™

œ-

-œ

Vc.

w w

?# w w

w w

{

-œ

˙™

that is always working.

w w

Pno.

-œ œœ

˙™ ˙™

w w mf

w w

˙™ ˙™

œ œ-

18 Fl.

Cl.

Vln.

Vc.

25 w

## & # w

to a place that is always open,

that is always working.

25 # w & w w

Pno.

{

You can never be late

?# w w

w w w

w w

Fl.

Cl.

Vln.

Vc.

## w & # &

{

A mineﬁeld never sleeps.*

# w w & w

Pno.

A mineﬁeld never sleeps.*

?# w w

∑

*Should not be uttered simultaneously with the rest of the ensemble.