BEING MINDFUL
10 ways to Incorporate Mindfulness into Everyday Life
JESSICA WAT TERS
BEING MINDFUL
10 ways to Incorporate Mindfulness into Everyday Life
JESSICA WAT TERS
Mindfulness is a form of mental training that supports
the mind to be more focused, effective, and present to what we are doing as we are doing it.Our minds are so often planning or worrying about the future or reflecting on the past, we miss the place where life is happening, here, in this moment. Develop mindfulness through practice by drawing your attention to the present moment in everyday activities, such as ... 1.
When Driving
2. When Eating 3. When Walking 4. In Confrontation 5. In Queues 6. On Social Media 7. When Exercising 8. In Conversation 9. In the Shower 10. When Going to Sleep
Be Mindful when ... Driving 1. Savor the silence – We often drive along whilst listening to the radio or our CDs etc. Just as an experiment, try seeing what it’s like to have the sound turned off. It might seem at first as if something is missing, but you’ll quickly learn that the silence gives you an opportunity to fill your awareness with other perceptions, some of which are more enriching. 2. Notice any tensions in your body – Such as a knot of tension in the belly, or your hands gripping the steering well, or a clenched jaw. Notice these experiences, and let your body relax more. Notice how your experience changes and becomes more enjoyable as your muscles let go. 3. Notice your attitudes – Often we become competitive while driving, and this leads to tension. Make a practice of noticing cars trying to enter the road, and adjust your speed so that you can let them out if it’s safe to do so. Notice if you’re in a hurry. How does this make you feel? How does it feel if you let the pace slacken a little? 4. Take three deep breaths – Get into the car. Before you turn on the ignition, take three deep breaths. Really let go on the out breath. Repeat when you turn the ignition off, right before you get out.
Be Mindful when ... Eating 1. Let your body catch up to your brain – The body actually sends its stop signal about 20 minutes after the brain, which is why we often unconsciously overeat. But, if we slow down, you can give your body a chance to catch up to your brain and hear the signals to eat the right amount. 2. Know your body’s personal hunger signals – Too often, we eat when our mind tells us to, rather than our bodies. True mindful eating is actually listening deeply to our body’s signals for hunger. Ask yourself: What are your body’s hunger signals, and what are your emotional hunger triggers? 3. Consider the life cycle of your food – When we pause to consider all of the people involved in the meal that has arrived on your plate, from the loved ones (and yourself) who prepared it, to those who stocked the shelves, to those who planted and harvested the raw ingredients, to those who supported them, it is hard to not feel both grateful and interconnected. 4. Attend to your plate – When we are distracted, it becomes harder to listen to our body’s signals about food and other needs. With your next meal, try single-tasking and just eating, with no screens or distractions besides enjoying the company you are sharing a meal and conversation with.
Be Mindful when ... Walking 1. Focus on your movements – With each step, pay attention to the lifting and falling of your foot. Notice movement in your legs and the rest of your body. Notice any shifting of your body from side to side. Whatever else captures your attention, come back to the sensation of walking. Your mind will wander, so without frustration, guide it back again as many times as you need. 2. Expand your attention to sounds – Whether you’re indoors, in the woods, or in a city, pay attention to sounds without labelling or naming, or getting caught up in whether you find them pleasant or unpleasant. Notice sounds as nothing more or less than sound. 3. Bring awareness to your sense of smell – Again, simply notice. Don’t push or force yourself to feel anything at all, just bring attention to the sense of smell, whatever you discover. 4. Move now to vision – Colors and objects and whatever else you see. Patiently coming back each time something grabs your attention, or even if something needs addressing, like avoiding an obstacle. Staying natural, not overly rigid, not daydreaming and drifting, but with sustained awareness.
Be Mindful in ... Confrontation 1. Control your breathing – When the moment comes and you are thrust into a confrontation, take deep breaths, slowly. This lowers your heartbeat and blood pressure, and slows down the adrenaline flowing through your veins.It is best that you slow down your responses so that you can stop and think about what you are doing and saying, rather than just reacting blindly. 2. Stay reasonable – Listen to the person and try to find out what he or she wants from you. You are not obliged to respond to their provocation in the manner that they want you to. If, from what he or she says, you see that you were somehow at fault, apologize immediately. If, however, you realize that you are in fact the injured party, be patient, and try to make the other person see your side of things. 3. Turn a mirror on the other person – Try to make him or her realize how their behaviour appears to others. “Why are you yelling at me? Please calm down.” “Why are you cursing at me? Please be civil.” “Is there a reason you are being so hostile towards me? There is no need for violence.” Try to make him or her realize their surroundings, bring them out of their headspace. “We are in a public place.” “People are watching.” 4. Do not let the other person push your buttons – There are some things that will trigger your own anger. Keep these in the back of your mind and remind yourself to stay calm even if the other person pushes those buttons. Do not allow him or her to draw you into an argument. If he or she is in the wrong, they should be made aware of that – but it is easier if you do not let the argument escalate to the point where both of you are shouting.
WHY DON’T YOU LISTEN TO ME ?!?! BECAUSE YOU MAKE ME LOOK STUPID!
Be Mindful in ... Queues 1. Take notice of your emotions – Pay attention to your mood and how it changes when you first catch a glimpse of the queue (whether it be in a bank or grocery store etc.) Notice how you feel when you realize you’ll have to wait, does your heart beat faster? Do you feel annoyed? Angry? As you are waiting, become aware of any emotions that may be bubbling up. 2. Be mindful of your body – Once you’re sitting or standing in the line, pull your attention away from the mental and emotional part of your experience, and be mindful of your body. Be Mindful of how you stand, your breath and where any tensions are as you scan through your body. Feel your feet on the ground, your inhalations and exhalations. Notice each and every tiny movement. 3. Be aware of the stories your mind makes up – Are you trying to convince yourself that the lines are long ONLY when YOU are in the store? Are you telling yourself that YOU are in a big hurry and why can’t everyone else just hurry up!? Once you know what stories you’re telling yourself ask yourself, Is your story true? Is there evidence to support it? 4. Tend to yourself & those around you – No one likes waiting in line. You may indeed be in a big hurry, with lots on your plate today. Simply tell yourself, “Yes, this is hard right now. What can I do to be kind to myself?” Maybe it’s finding a place to sit. Maybe it’s realizing you’ll simply have to return another day. Also tend to those around you. Long lines of customers can’t be very easy for the people who must service them. Send some kind thoughts or even kind words to the people who are doing the best they can to help you.
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Be Mindful on ... Social Media 1. Set an intention – Before you get on social media, stop, take a breath, and remind yourself that your goal is to have a positive experience. 2. Take the time to clean up your feed – Unfollow people that regularly complain or post negative content, and consciously choose to follow more positive people and pages. This will make a world of difference if you end up scrolling through unconsciously, because you will unconsciously be taking in uplifting information. 3. Let go of your attachment to the outcome – Unconsciously, you might think that likes = validation and that the more likes you get the more liked you are as a person, or that if you don’t get likes that you’re not liked as a person. The amount of likes you get has nothing to do with who you are, how attractive you are, or how many friends you have. Remember, some people actually pay for likes! They mean nothing. 4. Be curious about the stories your mind makes up – Scroll through your feed for five to ten minutes, with your full attention, and notice all the stories your mind makes up. When something comes up, ask yourself if it’s helpful for you to believe that story. Is it helpful for you to think you’re not good enough? Is it helpful for you to judge that other person’s choices in life? The mind thinks things that we wouldn’t want others to know. We must acknowledge that this content is there and be non-attached to it at the same time.
Be Mindful when ... Exercising 1. Have a Purpose for Each Workout – Too often we exercise to lose weight, but that isn’t something that’s going to happen during any one workout. We need something to hold onto right now. Having a purpose will give you something to focus on, something to work for and, therefore, something you can feel good about. 2. Remember Why You’re Exercising – If you find yourself rushing through exercise, thinking of all the things you should be doing instead, remember why it’s important to do your workout. Reflect on why have you made exercise a priority and how will this workout help you right now. 3. Slow Down – Remember, you set this time aside specifically for your workout, so give yourself permission to actually do it. Take your time with each activity, each movement, particularly strength training exercises. Focus on your form, on the upward motion and the downward motion. Think about your posture, your core, and the rest of your body, including the muscles you are targeting. Focus on feeling them contract and relax. See just how much you can get out of your exercise time. 4. Remind Yourself To Breathe – Breathing is the simplest way to deal with stress and bring you into the current moment. If your mind wanders during your workout or you keep watching the clock, close your eyes and take a breath to bring yourself back to the moment. You’re exercising right now and that’s all you have to do. You’ll deal with the rest when it’s time.
Be Mindful In ... Conversation 1. Turn off all media devices – If you want mindful conversation, eliminate the temptation of looking at any media device, even for a millisecond. By ridding yourself of distractions, you clear your attention for meaningful interaction with another. This temporary sacrifice will be worth the connection you are preparing yourself to experience. 2. Listen using your eyes – A person’s eyes tell you what is happening in their heart. Your awareness that your conversation partner might be feeling certain emotions allows you to adjust your communication appropriately. Having open eyes also will allow you to observe the other person’s posture and gestures. These movements can indicate an emotional wall (crossed arms or legs), a desire to leave or disengage (fidgeting), an inclination to say something (by an opening mouth or a hand that is raised), and many other things. 3. Attempt to truly understand what the other person is saying without judgment, criticism, or defensiveness – In the event you are involved in a conversation in which the other person says something that offends you, before going off the rails, clarify. Make sure you heard what the other person meant to say (or vice versa). If, in fact, the person did say something which hurt you, don’t react immediately. Attempt to understand the true motivation behind the statement. 4. Make your conversation other-focused – During many conversations, rather than listening to what the other person is saying, people are more concerned with what they are going to say next. The individual who can’t wait for the other person to stop talking so they can start isn’t focused on the other. When your communication becomes other-focused, you really are trying to understand what your partner is communicating.
Be Mindful in ... The Shower 1. Begin by immersing one by one your toes into the falling water. . 2. Slowly work your way up, focusing only on feeling the drop’s texture over the body part that is directly under the water. Closing your eyes can help you concentrate even more. 3. Once you reach your head, activate your other senses so that you feel the water drops having contact with your skin. Also see and hear them as they slide down. 4. Now, if the water is hot, start transitioning to colder water, until reaching the coldest possible (without changing from hot to cold drastically). Feel how the comfort of hot water transforms into the awakening of cold temperature. Experience it without judging. Discover the good in being under hot water and the good in being under cold water.
Be Mindful when ... Going to Sleep 1. Dim the lights 1 hour before bedtime – Start winding down the brain and body by dimming the lights. Engage in relaxing activities outside the bedroom that pass the time quietly. 2. Say goodnight to your devices – The first thing we need to pay attention to is getting our screens out of the room. If you have your phone or a tablet lighting up your bedside table, it’s going to disturb your sleeping patterns. It’s best if it’s not in your room at all. It’s creating activity in your mind that you have to pay attention to. 3. Don’t force it – We have to stop trying to fall asleep. Our brains are too smart for that. The moment we’re trying to do something, we’re creating stress on top of it. So we don’t want to try and fall asleep. See if you can let go of the notion of trying to fall asleep at all. 4. Try a body scan meditation – Bring mindfulness into the sleep experience. You can do a gentle body scan practice where you’re being curious about just noticing sensations in your body and your breathing. When your attention wanders or becomes frustrated, see if you can just take note of that and gently come back to being with what’s here. When we allow ourselves to be with what’s here, the body naturally goes to rest, which is what it wants to do.
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Be Mindful ... When Driving When Eating When Walking In Confrontation In Queues On Social Media When Exercising In Conversation In the Shower When Going to Sleep