Leading With Moxie

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LEADING WITH MOXIE A 31-day guide for career satisfaction and success

Debra K. Mooney, PhD



INTRODUCTION I have held numerous positions, roles, and titles throughout my career. But all of them have had something in common. I have had the joy of supporting women and men through their careers as they become more confident and competent professionals—in other words, as they become leaders with moxie. Why moxie? In the 1920s, “Moxie” was an energy drink that was more popular than Coca Cola. By the ‘30s, the word had become a descriptor for people who were spirited, who were bold, and who had grit—the same qualities that are needed in today’s leaders. You’ll notice that this journal is not a “how to” book—there are many of those. Rather, this book will help you dig deeper into the process and experience of leading. Our culture focuses a lot on first impressions, but this is a guide for lasting impressions. My philosophy is that you know yourself best, and—that with a path and new insights—you can be leading with moxie in 31 days!

I thank Dr. Elizabeth Stockton, CEO of Clear Sharp Writing and my Aviatra Accelerators classmate, for her insights, editing, and moral support in the writing of this journal and its precursor.

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DEFINITION WHAT IS A LEADER? What is a leader? This is a question that, if posed to 10 people, would garner 10 very different answers. Yet we often assume that what we think makes a leader is what others think, too. Some people define leadership as having extraordinary intrapersonal traits, such as being visionary, smart, creative, or charismatic. Others value behaviors and style, including composure and confidence, being a good communicator, creating consensus, or having strong organizational skills. Still others focus on interpersonal qualities like the ability to influence a group or serve as a personal mentor and guide. And some consider content expertise, talent, or position and title alone. By recognizing our own personal definitions of a leader, we can discover what we would like to improve upon and also determine how we can become more effective leaders.

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I THINK A LEADER IS……….

Next: Find a leadership quote that captures your definition of a leader. For inspiration, post it where you can regularly see it, such as in your folio or desk drawer.

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BEGINNINGS THE PROCESS OF BECOMING A LEADER BEGINS IN CHILDHOOD. We learn about being a leader from those around us, especially our parents. The expectations they have for us can powerfully affect our thoughts and behaviors as adults. In many instances, the impact is unconscious. We take the beliefs for granted, and over the course of our lives, they guide us and shape who we are. Recognizing these early lessons helps us to bring them to consciousness. You will find that some expectations are helpful and that some are not. Identifying them enables you to make choices. A good start in identifying early lessons is to recall the quotes or sayings you remember from your parents. Do any of these ring a bell? Never burn bridges! Why become a designer when you can be an architect? The squeaky wheel gets the grease. There is no greater joy than parenting!

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WHAT LIFE LESSONS ABOUT BEING A LEADER DID I LEARN FROM MY MOTHER? FROM MY FATHER?

Next: Put a star next to the lessons that have been most helpful to you in your work life. Put an X next to the lessons that are not fitting for you at this time in your career.

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ROLE MODELS WE CAN LEARN A LOT FROM OUR ROLE MODELS. A role model is someone who has a quality (or qualities) that we admire and that we would like to emulate. Our models can be women and men we personally know or not. For instance, many people admire Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg for her intelligence and feisty spirit. Misty Copeland, the first African American female principal dancer with the prestigious American Ballet Theatre Company, is held in high regard for having overcome barriers. Steve Jobs is acclaimed as a leading visionary of the century. Of course, Barak Obama and Donald Trump are respected for their political leadership and influence. Certainly, our models can also be family members and others “in our own back yard.� You may admire a friend who is outgoing and liked by all, a neighbor who serves on your city council, or a colleague who is poised and sophisticated during the most trying of times. * THE 2017 MOST ADMIRED WOMEN WERE: Hillary Clinton, Michelle Obama, Oprah Winfrey, Elizabeth Warren, and Angela Merkel. * THE 2017 MOST ADMIRED MEN WERE: Barack Obama, Donald Trump, Pope Francis, Rev. Bill Graham, and John McCain.

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TEN ROLE MODELS, WITH THE SPECIFIC QUALITIES THAT I ADMIRE, ARE:

Next: Pick one of the models above. Imagine yourself with a bit more of the quality that you admire. Then test it out by being that way in your next meeting or during a conversation.

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BE BOLD SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE ARE REALLY NOT MORE CONFIDENT OR ASSURED IN THEIR ABILITIES THAN OTHERS, BUT THEY ARE MORE PERSISTENT. To put it another way, they are bold, and they demonstrate this boldness in many ways. First, they stretch themselves. They are eager to learn something new or to try new experiences. They say “Yes, I can do that,” even when they aren’t 100% sure. They’ll definitely learn when given the opportunity. Second, they often see obstacles as problems waiting to be solved. Instead of seeing road blocks in their career path, these leaders see challenges as hurdles to be leapt over. And third, bold leaders are passionate about their work. They find purpose in what they do; they believe their career really matters and makes a difference in their [local] world.

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HOW DOES MY WORK MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN THE [LOCAL] WORLD? WHO BENEFITS FROM MY WORK? WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF NO ONE WAS AVAILABLE TO DO MY WORK?

Next: Take the time to learn something new. Anything. It can be professionally relevant or not. It can be a six-month commitment, such as taking college courses, or as short as five minutes to read a section in the local newspaper that you typically skip over.

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VIRTUOSITY VIRTUOSITY RELATES TO MORAL INTEGRITY AND GOODNESS. Researchers have found that “virtuous leaders� are viewed as effective, ethical, authentic, and transformational. They discovered that four observable and public behaviors characterize virtuous leadership. Prudence is to be insightful and to make decisions that balance the needs of the individual versus the organization. Temperance is to manage emotions in a way that avoids extremes while maintaining authenticity. Justice is to be fair. Fortitude is to demonstrate patience, perseverance, and courage in times of challenge and crisis. These four behaviors are the cardinal virtues originally described by Aristotle and other ancient Greek philosophers. Today, these virtues are the roots of authentic leadership theory, which asserts that, since there is no one right way to be an effective leader, being your true self is the best approach. Authentic leaders are genuine, selfaware, honest, and ethical. This genuine leadership style is powerful because it invites others to be authentic as well.

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HOW HAVE I BEEN A VIRTUOUS LEADER AND DEMONSTRATED PRUDENCE, TEMPERANCE, JUSTICE, AND FORTITUDE?

Next: Of the four behaviors (prudence, temperance, justice, and fortitude), circle the one that is the most challenging for you. Identify two ways you can improve upon that behavior and be seen as a more virtuous–and authentic–leader. 1 2

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PUBLIC SPEAKING PUBLIC SPEAKING IS THE MOST COMMON PHOBIA REPORTED. Feeling nervous before an event is normal, but if the anxiety keeps you from speaking up and out, it can be a major career roadblock. Inversely, people who articulate their opinions and offer their perspectives are more likely to be noticed and distinguished. These three simple speaking tips will lead to more effective presentations: Practice, practice, practice (or avoid avoiding the presentation)– Rehearse the presentation as realistically as possible. Yes, this means speaking out loud, standing, and advancing slides on the computer screen while imagining the room and the audience around you. Feeling good in advance of giving a speech is the best thing you can do to give a good speech. tart by telling a personal story about how you connect with the S topic. People bond with other people more than they do with lists of data or facts. By telling your own story, the audience can connect with you, as well as with the information you’re sharing. It will help you to feel more at ease, too. Show your excitement and enthusiasm. Smile, use your hands, look at the crowd, and change your voice pattern. The audience won’t notice some stumbling over words, but they will notice being read to in monotone.

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WHAT CAN I DO TO STRENGTHEN MY COMPETENCE AND CONFIDENCE IN PUBLIC SPEAKING?

Next: In the next two days, speak at a time when you have something to say, but would normally only listen.

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DO THE MATH SECOND TO PUBLIC SPEAKING ANXIETY IS MATH ANXIETY. While everyone faces a “numbers nervousness” at times, an effective leader won’t let that fear keep them from approaching and learning necessary skills. There is no job or profession for which computational ability is unimportant. Today’s leaders are quantitatively skilled: they manage budgets, read financial projections, make statistical comparisons, graph results, and review analytics. For help with numerical tasks, consult one of the many resources available or turn to a trusted colleague. In my experience, confusion is more often due to the elaborate vocabulary than the actual computations. Get cozy with the lingo relevant to—and associated with—your field, be it probability, net revenue, third quartile, mass, variable ratio, valuation, or correlation. Your other talents will shine even more brightly when your analytical capabilities are revealed.

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IN WHAT ANALYTICAL/MATHEMATICAL AREA OF MY FIELD DO I FEEL MOST CONFIDENT AND COMPETENT?

Next: Select an analytical area that you feel less confident about– and learn about it. What did you learn?

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BE ENTREPRENEURIAL ENTREPRENEURIALISM IS ON THE RISE AND IS CONTRIBUTING TO NATIONAL ECONOMIC GROWTH, JOBS, AND BETTER LIVING THROUGH INNOVATIONS. Entrepreneurs need to be able to take a creative idea and carry it into the marketplace, and these skills can benefit any leader. This philosophy of “doing business” has much to offer all leaders, whether heading a start-up or just starting out at a major corporate office. Some defining qualities of entrepreneurs is that they: Follow their passion by doing what they love (which isn’t about getting rich quickly) and not just dreaming about “what if.” Prepare by learning about—and digging into—every aspect of their businesses (from A for accounting to Z for zippy inventory delivery). Are budget savvy by managing money effectively, whether it is personal or organizational finances. Focus on selling by connecting with customers and suppliers in ways that stretch their comfort level. Are innovative by thinking in realistic, yet out-of-the-box, ways to dream up distinctive and useful products or services. Consult and work with mentors because they understand this is the best way to learn new skills and information targeted to their own success. Know that they are the brand and make all decisions focused on the message.

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WHAT QUALITIES OF AN ENTREPRENEUR RESONATE WITH ME?

Next: Be an entrepreneur with yourself as the “product.” What do you need to do more of? Less of?

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LET’S FACE IT! SHOULD LEADERS SMILE? THE SIMPLE ANSWER IS “YES”—FOR TWO REASONS. First, smiling creates a comfortable work environment. People naturally mimic the posture of others. So, our smile leads those around us to smile. We help them feel good, too. Smiling also reduces our own individual stress and keeps us in a good mood. It releases endorphins—the hormones that lower pain (e.g., during exercise) and increase pleasure (e.g., during sex), and smiling also triggers “happiness” brain chemistry. Finally, people who smile are viewed as competent, likable, and courteous. Smiling is a biological expression of emotion that has the same meaning across cultures, so it is powerful. Women tend to smile more than men, but that difference is most prominent for 20-somethings and dissipates for older adults. More significantly, there is little difference between men and women of the same work position or title; so social role is as important as gender role in who puts on a happy face. There is a major caveat to smiling: it must be genuine. People are naturally inclined to “read” expressions. Leaders with fake or illtimed smiles are viewed as less credible, especially women leaders. Research supports actress Connie Stevens’ personal motto, “Nothing you wear is more important than your smile.”

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IN WHAT SITUATIONS DO I FIND IT EASIEST TO SMILE? WHEN DO I FIND IT MOST DIFFICULT TO SMILE?

Next: Practice genuine smiling (keep your facial muscles relaxed and use your eyes). Smile while passing strangers. How do they respond?

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NON-VERBAL COMMUNICATION WE CONVEY A LOT OF INFORMATION ABOUT OURSELVES WITHOUT SAYING A WORD. In fact, it has been suggested that we form an impression of a person within just seven seconds! What do you want to tell the world—or at least the room—about yourself? Beyond the “strong handshake,” your body language can exude confidence and create a feeling of connection in many ways. Consider these head-to-toe behaviors that suggest leadership competence, approachability, and honesty: Smile—as noted on the previous page. Stand tall. Maintain eye contact without staring. Sit at the head of the table when leading a meeting. (If an attendee, sit to the right of the leader.) When meeting with one other person, sit diagonally to each other. Keep your arms uncrossed and hands open. Nod when others are speaking. Dress conservatively in blue (which is associated with ability and trust). Match your voice tone to the message (emotion and meaning is heavily conveyed through tone, volume, and speed of speech).

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WHAT IMPRESSIONS DO MY NON-VERBAL COMMUNICATIONS OFFER? WHICH BEHAVIORS ON THE LIST COME NATURALLY TO ME?

Next: Practice some of the non-verbal behaviors that come less naturally to you. How do others respond?

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YOU ARE A SALESPERSON “I HAVE ALWAYS SAID THAT EVERYONE IS IN SALES. Maybe you don’t hold the title of salesperson, but if the business you are in requires you to deal with people, you, my friend, are in sales.” Of course, the well-known motivational speaker and business consultant, Zig Ziglar, made this declaration, knowing that every job requires dealing with people. Top sales professionals focus their attention on their next success, not their previous setbacks. Their motivation derives from the successful sale and the “yeses,” rather than from avoiding the “no’s.” In other words, they stay energized by seeking the next success rather than by dwelling on failures. They don’t allow themselves to become discouraged and demoralized. In addition to persistence, customers value salespeople who: Believe in and know the product. If you would buy what you are selling, the passion is contagious. Are honest. People sense when being “sold a bill of goods.” Are empathic. Customers are comforted when they feel understood by someone who genuinely cares and is not insistent.

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IF EVERYONE’S JOB IS IN SALES, WHAT IS IT THAT I SELL AND WHAT ARE MY BEST QUALITIES THAT LEAD TO “SEALING THE DEAL”?

Next: The next time you purchase a product after interacting with a (by title) salesperson, note the qualities and skills s/he had that drew you to buy.

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MOXIE WE CAN LEARN A LOT FROM ELEANOR ROOSEVELT’S STIRRING DECLARATION, “WE MUST DO THE THINGS WE THINK WE CANNOT DO.” Fear can be enemy #1 to career satisfaction and advancement. When making decisions, many people become immobilized, worrying about how others are going to react or whether the choice they made was the “right” one. To keep from being paralyzed by such fears, realize that you cannot control others’ reactions. What you can do is make it a habit to openly explain the reasons behind your decisions. (See “Virtuosity.”) Beyond that, how the group members feel about your decision is their choice. Remember too that, except in very rare circumstances, many different options can lead to success. Plus, almost every decision or course of action can be modified if the situation does not progress as expected. Finally, make fear your friend. A bit of nervousness lets you know that you care about something and that you are stretching yourself. Allow your worries to become your motivation—your moxie—for busting through your own barriers.

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WHAT ARE THREE THINGS I MUST DO THAT I THINK I CANNOT DO?

Next: Pick one thing from your list of three. Make a four-step plan to help yourself “do the thing you think you cannot do”. Consider talking the plan over with your mentor or someone else you trust.

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STEREOTYPE THREAT DID YOU KNOW THAT IF WOMEN ARE “REMINDED” THAT THEY DO NOT PERFORM AS WELL AS MEN IN MATH BEFORE TAKING AN EXAM, THEY WILL SCORE LOWER THAN IF THEY ARE NOT REMINDED? Similarly, men who are told that they are being assessed on social sensitivity (reading non-verbal cues) and ‘reminded’ that women perform better than men will, in fact, perform worse than if they are told they were being evaluated on information processing skills. Stereotype threat is the fear of confirming a negative stereotype about one’s own gender, race, ethnicity, gender, or cultural group. Over 20 years ago, social psychologists Dr. Claude Steele and colleagues performed the first studies demonstrating that (racial) stereotype threat affected intellectual abilities. They suggested that under this threatening influence our brains start multi-tasking and are not able to focus solely on the challenges in front of us. You can reduce the effects of stereotype threat simply by being aware of the process and recognizing that it is happening. Using your imagination can bust these fears too. Pretend to be one of your role models (review your “Role Model” entry) or be your “future fearless self.”

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WHAT STEREOTYPES HAVE I FEARED THAT I AM CONFIRMING? IN WHAT SITUATION? WHAT CAN I DO TO BE ASSURED AND MORE CONFIDENT IN THE SITUATION?

Next: Test out your plan of action the next time you are in the situation.

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THE SECRET TO SUCCESS SUCCESS HAS MANY MEANINGS AND CAN ALSO PROVOKE MANY DIFFERENT REACTIONS— BOTH POSITIVE (E.G., PRIDE) AND NEGATIVE (E.G., JEALOUSY, INFERIORITY). We each define success for ourselves—and, conversely, we define what failure is, too. This means that our sense of success—and failure—is completely within our control. There are five useful considerations for understanding success: It is temporary. It is associated with specific events and activities, not our character. Cultural and social expectations may lead men to feel added pressure to “be successful” and for women to “avoid failure.” This can lead men to be competitive in neutral situations and women to be perfectionistic and/or cautious when striving to achieve. Persisting through challenges and learning from set-backs can be the best ways to achieve success. Since success is a state of mind, reassuring self-talk is vital. Also, don’t forget about the power of “momentum success.” We can build it by taking joy in accomplishing small daily goals. Tiny triumphs add up to grand achievements. Remember: the real secret to success is that (our) perceptions of success breed success.

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I HAVE SUCCEEDED WHEN (OR BECAUSE I)…:

WHAT DID I DO YESTERDAY TO CREATE MOMENTUM? WHAT WILL I DO TODAY?

Next: Take note of your inner thoughts when something turns out differently than expected. What do you hear? Is the self-talk motivating or discouraging?

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WORK-LIFE BALANCE IT SEEMS IMPOSSIBLE TO ADDRESS LEADERSHIP WITHOUT DISCUSSING “WORK-LIFE BALANCE.” So, what is the best way to balance office responsibilities with home responsibilities? I asked the experts—my colleagues. I was surprised by how these conversations differed between women and men. Both, however, agreed that balance really becomes tricky when “life gets fuller”—especially with parenthood. The women I spoke with focused on not trying to be “a supermom and do it all.” This is probably due to the fact that working women continue to be the primary child caretakers and household managers. Their advice centered on prioritizing commitments and self-compassion. As one colleague remarked, “Think of ‘balance’ over a lifetime, not a day, week, or month—or even a year.” Conversely, many men have a very difficult time, literally and figuratively, being away from the workplace. Their identity is often bound up in their careers, meaning that the pressure men feel is about more than just being the primary breadwinner. As one man confided, “It’s a spiritual thing. It’s not about money.” It is for this reason that men emphasize habits that require an “identity away from work”—for instance, as a church member or referee. Some suggest taking on roles that demand one’s full attention, such as coaching, meditation, journaling, or being alone with their children. (“If my wife is home, I feel like I can think about work.”)

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WHAT TIP FOR WORK-LIFE BALANCE WOULD I GIVE IF ASKED?

WHICH INTERNAL CHALLENGE DO I STRUGGLE WITH WHEN MANAGING HOME AND WORK DESIRES?

Next: Outline realistic ways that you can better follow through with the tips that work best for you

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NETWORKING THERE ARE MANY ADVANTAGES TO BONDING WITH NETWORKS (GROUPS OF INTERCONNECTED PEOPLE) BOTH INSIDE AND OUTSIDE OF YOUR ORGANIZATION. Networking benefits include: • Becoming more aware of trends and news within your field and organization. • Expanding opportunities and collaborations. (People engage with those whom they know.) • Meeting new colleagues and deepening friendships. • Gaining sound advice. • Adding novelty to the day-to-day routine. • Surrounding yourself with positive and motivated people. (It rubs off too!) There are two important networking don’ts: • Don’t forget about informal networks because they can be just as influential as more formally defined units. • Don’t glom on to someone you already know at gatherings just to ease your social discomfort. (This is even more relevant the higher up the organization you are.) A simple way to grow your network is to set the goal of introducing yourself and having a brief conversation with one new person at each large gathering you attend.

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I AM (OR CAN BE) A PART OF THE FOLLOWING FORMAL AND INFORMAL NETWORKS:

I DEFINE NETWORKING AS:

I ENJOY NETWORKING BECAUSE:

I AM SQUEAMISH WHEN NETWORKING BECAUSE:

Next: Pinpoint a thought or action that will help you overcome your networking squeamishness.

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EMAIL NOTES AND MEMOS BECAUSE WE COMMUNICATE WITH SO MANY PEOPLE THROUGH OUR WRITING, OUR WRITING STYLE SAYS A LOT ABOUT OUR LEADERSHIP STYLE. It is important to remember, however, that a long and thorough e-note, explaining all of your sophisticated and detailed ideas, may, in fact, run counter to your purpose. Studies have found that people spend only 15-20 seconds on average reading an e-mail, and most are responded to within two minutes, using a smart phone. So “less is best” if you want your messages read and acted upon. Try these steps: 1. Explain the purpose of the note in the subject line in five words or less (e.g., Question re: FY21 budget). 2. I n bold font, state the action or response that you are seeking within the first two sentences. (e.g., Please review the anticipated expenses for stationery and landscaping in the proposed FY21 budget. Suzie Smith, CFO, appreciates your opinion on its accuracy within the next 48 hours). 3. Explanatory information follows. Use bullet points to organize the who/what/where/when/whys.

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WHAT EMAIL MESSAGES GRAB MY ATTENTION AND GET ME TO RESPOND QUICKLY? WHAT IS IT ABOUT THOSE MESSAGES THAT RESONATE WITH ME?

Next: Try out the “less is best” method. How did it work?

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ORGANIZE TO PRIORITIZE BEING ORGANIZED IS IMPORTANT FOR WORK EFFICIENCY, PRODUCTIVITY, PROFESSIONALISM, AND—MOST IMPORTANTLY—TO KEEP FOCUSED ON GOALS AND PRIORITIES. These outcomes arise from order and attention at the macro-(e.g., family calendaring) and micro-(e.g., the e-mail in-box) levels in both our personal and professional lives. Build a long-lasting habit of organization: Structure your to-do list as you would a work project. We are familiar with project management templates and charts “for the planning and execution necessary to achieve goals and objectives within an organization” (you may have even attended a seminar on Project Management). The same type of categorization that you prefer for major organizational activities will be useful for organizing and combining your personal and professional responsibilities. Declutter by having a place and space for everything in your office and home. This includes a filing system for your electronic messages and files too. Schedule daily time to check and respond to e-mail messages. Clean your workspace at the end of the day and create a list of what you need to do the next day so that you are not taking work [mentally] home. This deliberate activity helps you mark your stopping point and feel confident in what you have accomplished. A highly organized leader has the time to be a highly effective leader. Attention and energy can turn to the important “extras”— writing thank you notes, having casual conversations with coworkers, or attending a professional development meeting.

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IN WHAT WAYS AM I HIGHLY ORGANIZED? IN WHAT AREAS OF MY LIFE DO I WANT TO BE MORE STRUCTURED? HOW CAN I ENHANCE STRUCTURES I’M ALREADY USING?

Next: Today, take the time to clean up your desk, laptop, or filing system. Tomorrow, complete an “extra” with the additional time that the organization gives you.

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REJUVENATION LEADERS WITH ALL THE SKILLS AND CONFIDENCE IN THE WORLD ARE NOT EFFECTIVE IF THEY ARE MENTALLY, PHYSICALLY, OR SPIRITUALTY DRAINED. While an annual vacation is important, setting aside moments for daily renewal is also necessary. A few minutes of personal time will keep your spark alive and prevent burn out. Moreover, these daily activities need to be undertakings that you look forward to; these are “want-to’s.” Regularly change them up, so they don’t become dull, rote, or a “have-to.” When I ask colleagues what they do for daily fortification, these are some of the activities they mention:

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Walk/Jog/Run

Listen to music

Yoga

Pleasure read

Meditate

Cook/Bake

Dance

Garden

Watch television

Sew

Read the newspaper

Catnap

Reflect/Pray

Get a message or facial

Play an instrument

Handwrite notes to friends

Lift weights

Bird watch

Carpentry

Ride a bike

Car maintenance

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WHAT DO I DO FOR DAILY FORTIFICATION–MENTALLY, PHYSICALLY, AND SPIRITUALLY?

Next: Try a new activity that grabs your attention from the list (or any other that you’ve wanted to try)

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TEAM CULTURE “THERE IS NO ‘I’ IN TEAM” IS A SAYING THAT YOU MAY HAVE HEARD OR SEEN PAINTED ON THE WALLS OF A LOCKER ROOM. For group unity and collaboration, this is true. However, regarding the management and motivation of those who report to you, there are many I’s. Attending to the uniqueness of each person on your team is important. A colleague and I have underscored the importance of “leading for innovation through the lens of the psychological situation.” This means that leaders should consider how each individual team member’s personal style interacts with the larger context. Some individuals seem to read every situation as an opportunity to “win” while others find competitive situations anxiety-provoking or potentially embarrassing. Similarly, the current trend of creating “irreverent and fun” organizational cultures may get some people’s creative juices flowing, but others may find that same setting frivolous, disrespectful, or even offensive. Likewise, an emphasis on “speed and spontaneity” may increase some employees’ output, but for individuals who tend to make poor impulsive decisions, rushing through work may be seriously counterproductive. As a leader, you must be aware of how each person on your team responds to various situations and motivations so that you can align them with the culture that you are trying to create.

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LIST A UNIQUE QUALITY FOR EACH PERSON ON YOUR TEAM. HOW DOES EACH PERSON RESPOND TO PRAISE –CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM–TEAM SUCCESS–A CRISIS –[A SITUATION OF YOUR CHOICE]?

Next: The next time you are delegating responsibility or assigning tasks, consider the combination of skill and individual style in your choice. In what ways does the combination affect your decision?

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HARDINESS ALMOST 40 YEARS AGO, RESEARCH PSYCHOLOGIST DR. SALVATORE MADDI NOTED THAT CORPORATE DECISION-MAKERS HAD DIFFERENT REACTIONS TO THE SAME WORKPLACE STRESSORS. For some, stress had no tangible effect on their performance, morale, or health, but others were overwhelmed by the same pressures. Maddi labeled those who could withstand the stress “hardy leaders,” and he identified the “three c’s” that defined them: challenge, control, and commitment. Challenge–is the recognition that life naturally includes stress and understands that overcoming stress is a path to even greater success. Control–is the belief that you have the ability to act and influence the outcome of events. Commitment–is having a personal sense of meaning and purpose in life. It helps us to stay motivated and persistence through difficult times. Together, the three traits contribute to resilience and effective coping throughout one’s career.

In 2012, Dr. Maddi, founder of the Hardiness Institute, received the Gold Medal Award for Life Achievement in Psychology in the Public Interest from the American Psychological Association for his work on hardiness.

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WHICH OF THE THREE ATTITUDES COMES MOST NATURALLY TO ME? WHICH IS MOST DIFFICULT?

Next: When the next workplace hardship arises, focus on thriving through the three c’s. Lessons 4 Living. The 3 C’s of Hardiness. www.lessons4living.com/wmaz_week196.htm.

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GENERATIONAL INFLUENCES JUST AS OUR FAMILY AND FRIENDS AFFECT OUR LEADERSHIP STYLE, SO DOES OUR GENERATIONAL CONTEXT. IT HELPS TO KNOW THE QUALITIES OF YOUR OWN GENERATION AND THAT OF OTHERS TO BEST CAPITALIZE ON THE DIVERSITY THAT AGE BRINGS. Baby boomers, born between 1946 and 1964, were raised believing that with hard work they could live the American dream. They are mission-oriented and loyal to the organization. Boomers are highly responsive to recognition and praise. On the down side, they have difficulty with change and assume that everyone should be workaholics. Post-boomers, born between 1965 and 1980, are the first generation in the U.S. not to be more financially successful than their parents. Unlike baby boomers, Xers are quite flexible. Yet they are cynical and distrust institutions. For these reasons, they tend to appreciate independence and informal structures in the work setting. Because work-life balance is important to them, they value time off and other benefits. Echo boomers, born between 1981 and 2000, grew up with childcentered parents protecting them from violence (9/11, terrorism, school shootings, etc.). They are collaborative and optimistic, yet may seem impatient as they climb the career ladder. Millennials thrive when engaged in “meaningful work.” Gen Z, born after 2000, are just entering the workforce. They are tech-savvy, and ironically (or because of this) they highly value one-on-one mentoring and close relationships with coworkers. With a robust entrepreneurial spirit, they may overlook (in-)formal organizational expectations and structures.

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GIVEN MY GENERATIONAL AND PERSONAL CHARACTERISTICS, WHAT ARE SOME BENEFITS THAT I GAIN WHEN TEAMING WITH A GEN X, Y, AND Z??

Next: When next assigning projects to individuals and teams, consider generational influences along with specific individual characteristics.

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HEADING A MEETING LEADING A MEETING IS A QUINTESSENTIAL LEADERSHIP TASK. Recently, organizational experts have questioned the human resource costs of holding so many, often ineffective meetings. Distinguish yourself by managing meetings competently, and you can solidify your role as a skilled organizational leader. These pointers will ensure a fruitful and efficient meeting. • Develop an agenda and distribute it to attendees before the meeting. Include the anticipated length of time for each issue. With the exception of a few updates and reminders, agenda items should be important. (Important items require follow-up action.) • Solicit opinions from all in attendance. Support a culture in which different ideas and strategies can be voiced and discussed in a collegial way. Considering a range of ideas will result in a more productive outcome. • Manage the meeting as a conductor does an orchestra. Be directive while valuing the contribution of each attendee. • Delegate follow-up action items with a clear timeline for completion of the task. Being a leader as an attendee should not be undervalued. Be sure to actively listen to opinions and assertively voice your own to assist the group in making effective decisions

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WHAT ARE MY STRENGTHS AS A MEETING LEADER? IN WHAT WAYS CAN I IMPROVE THE PROCESS WHEN LEADING A MEETING?

Next: Test out your strategy leading a meeting the next time you are in the position

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LEADING FOR IMPACT YOUR ORGANIZATION HAS A VISION (ASPIRATION), MISSION (PURPOSE), AND STRATEGIC GOALS THAT GROW OUT OF AND REINFORCE THAT ORGANIZATION’S CULTURE, IDENTITY, AND CORE VALUES. Too often, however, the process of alignment is overlooked, especially when people assume the CEO alone should lead the way. But a successful organization needs all “on board.” This is where leaders can have a major impact. Make certain that individual and team accomplishments are celebrated and placed within the context of the organization’s larger vision, mission, and strategies. This means focusing on small daily or weekly successes even more than the semi- and annual goals! For instance, the office assistant who is praised by a customer for “going the extra mile” should be commended for her specific actions and for supporting the organizations’ commitment to customer satisfaction. This recognition is as important as celebrating an organization’s increase in return customers. In short, keep individuals engaged in the larger purpose by recognizing their specific achievements and how they contribute to the success of the organization. As Jeanne Knoerle has said, “The identity of an institution lies not in what anyone says about it from time to time, but in what everyone does about it every day.”

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WHAT ARE THE FORMAL AND INFORMAL VALUES OF MY ORGANIZATION? HOW DO I BEST CONTRIBUTE TO THEM?

Next: During the week, informally tell each of your team members something that you appreciate about a current undertaking and how it advances an organizational value. Be very specific about both the activity and the value.

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BEING INCLUSIVE EFFECTIVE LEADERS ENCOURAGE AND VALUE DIVERSITY, AND THEIR EFFORTS AND ENERGIES SUPPORT THE ORGANIZATION’S DIVERSITY GOALS. In addition to hiring practices, a leader can foster a team culture of inclusion. Such a culture goes beyond the absence of a hostile environment in regards to gender, race, sexual orientation, religion, age, and nationality; it goes beyond sheer numbers, too. It is also more than being “welcoming,” since this view assumes that there is an ingroup, waving in “the other.” Recently, there has been important attention paid to microaggressions. A micro-invalidation, a specific type of microaggression, is a cue that “negates and nullifies a person’s minoritized [or marginalized] reality.” Focusing on eliminating these invalidations helps create a culturally sensitive culture. A few examples, for instance: • Don’t claim to be “color blind” - no matter how well intentioned. • Learn the correct pronunciation of every team member’s name and don’t use a nickname unless it is offered. • When talking about diversity, include the various characteristics of race, gender, sexual identity/orientation, religion, age, nationality, and even ideas (i.e., political leaning).

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IN WHAT SITUATIONS HAVE I FELT EXCLUDED FROM AN “IN-GROUP”? WERE THESE MICROINVALIDATIONS?

Next: List some way that you can contribute to animating an inclusive team or organizational culture:

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HIRING NO ONE IS EXPECTED TO (OR CAN) BE AN EXPERT IN EVERY ASPECT OF THEIR PROFESSION. For this reason, one of a leader’s most important responsibilities is hiring personnel. Consider these points so that you can hire the best people for your team’s success: Consider your team’s structure–Identify both what is needed to fill gaps and advance your group and the specific expectations within that domain of expertise. Outline how you will assess each of these qualities for the new employee. Observe all aspects of a candidate–Every bit of information is telling. Are there typos in Mr. Smith’s cover letter? Does Ms. Jones thank the office assistant for hanging her coat? More often than not, if hired, Mr. Smith will consistently lack attention to details, and Ms. Jones will have a gracious and appreciative style. Are these behavioral observations significant for the specific position? If so, take note! Focus on the long term–Extroverts and those who exude confidence in themselves do very well in interviews. They tend to put others at ease and state their competencies without nuance. This style plays well in a three-hour interview process. Remember, however, that “still waters run deep.” The quieter, conscientious, and self-aware introvert may, in fact, be the best person for the position and could shine once they get on board and settled. Be confident–There is a saying that leaders tend to hire for control or for competence. Be self-assured and hire for the latter reason!

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WHEN LEADING A HIRING PROCESS, WHAT ARE MY STRENGTHS? WHAT ARE MY WEAKNESSES? WHAT QUALITIES IN THE HIRING TEAM DO I NEED TO COMPLEMENT MY STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES?

Next: Identify three “lessons learned” from your experience in hiring for success. 1 2 3

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GIVING PERFORMANCE FEEDBACK A PERFORMANCE REVIEW IS AN OPPORTUNITY TO SUPPORT AND GUIDE EMPLOYEES. Don’t avoid giving feedback out of the worry that it is only based on (your) perception. Your view is valid, and if you notice something, nine times out of ten, it happens across situations and people. The key to giving accurate and useful feedback is to focus on observable behaviors, not assumed motives or personality traits. An end-of-the-year review begins at the start of the year. In addition to goal setting, invite your direct report to list three strengths and three areas of improvement. Make sure to discuss their list with them directly so as to gain a greater understanding of their experience and insights. At a mid-year meeting, ask about how they perceive their progress toward their goals as well as about any new feelings about their areas of strengths and improvement. At the annual appraisal, address the performance in light of their perceptions. You will often be pleasantly surprised that the areas that the supervisee identified are often the points of strength and weakness that you wanted to note as well. This method enables those insights to originate from them, allowing you to serve as a resource for improvement and development.

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WHAT HAVE I LIKED AND DISLIKED ABOUT THE PERFORMANCE REVIEWS THAT I HAVE RECEIVED?

Next: List a few ways that you can improve your process of employee review.

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RECEIVING PERFORMANCE FEEDBACK CAPABLE LEADERS NOT ONLY OFFER EFFECTIVE FEEDBACK, BUT THEY ARE ALSO RECEPTIVE TO PERFORMANCE FEEDBACK. APPRAISALS POINT THE WAY TO OUR PROFESSIONAL IMPROVEMENT AND SUCCESS. Indeed, engaging in an inquisitive, non-defensive discussion with a supervisor can often turn the relationship into one of mentorship and counsel. In fact, some people believe that an openness to supervision is the single most important characteristic to consider when hiring. At a performance review meeting: • Have a mindset that welcomes the opportunity for awareness and information. • Listen to the feedback without interruption. • Summarize what you heard. • Thank your supervisor for the information. • Indicate clearly how you plan to build on the noted strengths and improvements. • Review the plan with her/him as part of an upcoming meeting. As your next performance review approaches, keep in mind that it is a wonderful occasion to understand more fully how your supervisor views your work, and as management expert Ken Blanchard says: “Feedback is the breakfast of champions.”

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HOW DO I FEEL IMMEDIATELY BEFORE RECEIVING PERFORMANCE FEEDBACK? ARE MY FEELINGS RELATED TO PRIOR EXPERIENCE/S?

Next: Evaluate the feedback you have received over the past five years. How have you built upon the strengths and improved upon the critiques?

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OPTIMISM WHO DOESN’T WANT TO WORK IN A PLACE WHERE PEOPLE ARE HOPEFUL AND ANTICIPATE GOOD OUTCOMES FOR THEIR EFFORTS? NO ONE. It is critical for a leader to nurture a culture of positivity. But how can this be accomplished without ignoring the inevitable challenges, tensions, and failures that arise in the work environment? The answer, ironically, is not to focus on a culture of optimism but rather on excellence. Excellence is a prevailing attitude. In an organization which values excellence, team members: • Share a common vision and purpose. • Collaborate. • Set high standards for quality. • Focus on solutions. • Are motivated to do what is best for the group (not to gain favor from the boss). • Are accountable for outcomes. • View obstacles and disappointments as challenges. • Give credit to the team. • Adapt to change (which keeps the organization nimble). This mindset boosts positivity and helps you overcome barriers and push through setbacks. Interestingly, “optimism” comes from the Latin word optimus meaning “the best.”

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HOW DO I CONTRIBUTE TO EXCELLENCE IN MY ORGANIZATION?

Next: Notice when colleagues and/or people who report to you are especially hopeful and optimistic. What is the context for this positive energy? How can you add to it?

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COLLEAGUESHIP DR. DAVID J. BURNS AND I HAVE CREATED A NEW PARADIGM OF LEADERSHIP WE CALL TRANSCOLLEGIAL LEADERSHIP (TL). We noticed that traditional models only address the impact leadership has on the vertical relationships within an organization. We wanted to think differently and emphasize how leadership can affect others too. More recently a focus on collaborative leadership has emphasized shared decision-making. Under this model of leadership, employees report increased productivity and greater satisfaction. However, leaders may engage in collaborative leadership simply because it is best for them or their area of responsibility. TL occurs when leaders routinely, but informally, provide support to persons or groups of equivalent authority (a colleague) in different areas of the organization. This leader is driven to improve the overall organization and advance its mission. Transcollegial leaders possess the qualities of collaborative leaders, such as being trustworthy and yielding, plus they are willing to give of their own time and resources to help others. The most important thing transcollegial leaders do is build the foundation for the organization, including a culture that fosters a sense of belonging. This is potent since a sense of belonging is the factor that most strongly relates to workplace engagement (motivation, commitment and pride).

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THREE EXAMPLES WHEN I HAVE ENGAGED IN TRANSCOLLEGIAL LEADERSHIP ARE:

A TIME WHEN I OR MY TEAM BENEFITED FROM A COLLEAGUE’S TRANSCOLLEGIAL LEADERSHIP IS WHEN:

Next: Since acts of colleagueship are both informal and not directly related to a person’s area of responsibility, it is imperative for area supervisors and co-workers to support such actions. The next time you see transcollegial behaviors happening in your organization, let the person/s know you notice and appreciate them.

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SEAL THE DEAL WHEN MEGAN MARKEL MARRIED PRINCE HARRY, SHE WAS GIVEN THE TITLE OF DUCHESS OF SUSSEX AND A COAT OF ARMS. AS IS THE TRADITION, HER COAT OF ARMS IS UNIQUE AND REPRESENTATIONAL. A number of elements represent her home state of California: blue for the Pacific Ocean, the two gold stripes represent sun rays of the sunshine state, and the poppies at the bottom are the state flower. As a former actress, calligrapher, and blogger, the quills symbolize “communication and the power of words.” Her activism is reflected by the songbird in movement with an open beak and wings out ready to take flight. Elements on the left side denote her connection to the royal family, with the lion representing Harry.

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USE THE TEMPLATE TO CREATE YOUR COAT OF ARMS. USE SYMBOLS, COLOR AND A MOTTO TO REFLECT YOUR PROFESSIONAL IDENTITY AND EXPERIENCES AND ACHIEVEMENTS THAT HAVE LED YOU TO BE THE LEADER THAT YOU ARE TODAY.

WHAT INSIGHTS DID I GAIN ABOUT MYSELF FROM THIS REFLECTION?

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META-REFLECTION THE GRANDFATHER OF THE REFLECTION-LEARNINGPERFORMANCE PROCESS, EDUCATION PHILOSOPHER JOHN DEWEY (1859-1952), REMINDS US THAT “WE DO NOT LEARN FROM EXPERIENCE…WE LEARN FROM REFLECTING ON EXPERIENCE.” Without flipping back through this journal and your entries, what are some significant take-aways you’ve gained from reflecting on your leadership and career this past month?

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AUTHOR’S NOTE – ON DISCRIMINATION MY APPROACH IN WRITING THIS JOURNAL BOOK IS TO PROVIDE EMPOWERMENT STRATEGIES SO THAT PEOPLE CAN FIND PROFESSIONAL FULFILLMENT AND CAN EXCEL IN THEIR CAREERS. That said, workplace unfairness, harassment, and discrimination occur. The U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) outlines the following four situations in which there are laws to protect against discrimination: • Unfair treatment because of your race, color, religion, sex (including pregnancy, gender identity, and sexual orientation), national origin, age (40 or older), disability or genetic information. • Harassment by managers, co-workers, or others in your workplace, because of your race, color, religion, sex (including pregnancy, gender identity, and sexual orientation), national origin, age (40 or older), disability, or genetic information. • Denial of a reasonable workplace accommodation that you need because of your religious beliefs or disability. • Retaliation because you complained about job discrimination, or assisted with a job discrimination investigation or lawsuit. If you face a discriminatory situation, document the event/s with as much detail and evidence as possible. Take the information to your organization’s human resources officer or you can file a “Charge of Discrimination” with the EEOC.

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REFERENCES AND RESOURCES Definition of Leadership Thirty-Three Ways to Define Leadership by Brittney Helmrich. https://www.businessnewsdaily.com/3647-leadership-definition.html#sthash. RXMeYsi5.dpuf, 2016. Beginnings Who Taught Us How To Lead?:Parental Influence On Leadership Styles by Asiyat Magomaeva. https://digitalcommons.wayne.edu/cgi/viewcontent. cgi?article=1364&context=oa_theses, Wayne State University, 2013. Role Models Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton Retain Most Admired Titles by Jeffrey M. Jones. https://news.gallup.com/poll/224672/barack-obama-hillary-clinton-retainadmired-titles.aspx, 2017. Be Bold Seven Things Bold People Do by Kevin Daum. https://www.inc.com/kevindaum/7-things-really-bold-people-do.html, Inc, 2018 Virtuosity Authentic Leadership: Rediscovering the Secrets to Creating Lasting Value by Bill George, Jossey-Bass, San Francisco, CA 2003 Leader Spirituality and Leader Virtues as Predictors of Effective Leadership by Mark Green, Carol A. Wheeler, & Maria N. Hodgson in The Journal of Spirituality and Effective Leadership Management, vol. 6, 2012. What Is Authentic Leadership? Do You Have It? By Ronald E Riggio. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/cutting-edge-leadership/201401/ what-is-authentic-leadership-do-you-have-it, Psychology Today, 2014. Public Speaking Successful Speeches. https://www.toastmasters.org/resources/public-speakingtips/successful-speeches, Toastmasters International, 2018. Do The Math Can Adults Overcome Math Anxiety? by Dave Roos. https://science. howstuffworks.com/math-concepts/can-adults-overcome-math-anxiety.htm, HowStuffWorks, 2018. Be Entrepreneurial Why entrepreneurship is on the rise by Gretel Kaufmann. https://www. csmonitor.com/Business/2016/0805/Why-entrepreneurship-is-on-the-rise,The Christian Science Monitor, 2016. Let’s Face It Women Smile More Than Men But Differences Disappear When They Are in The Same Role, Yale researcher finds https://news.yale.edu/2003/03/18/womensmile-more-men-differences-disappear-when-they-are-same-role-yaleresearcher-finds, Yale News, 2013. Non-verbal Communication Dimensions of Body Language: The Allure of Laughter and Smiles, http:// westsidetoastmasters.com/resources/book_of_body_language/chap3.html, Westside Toastmasters.

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You are a Salesperson Ten Characteristics of Successful Salespeople by Kelley Robertson. http://www. businessknowhow.com/marketing/successful-salesperson.htm, Business KnowHow, 2005 Moxie Stop Overthinking It: 9 Ways to Make Decisions With Confidence https://www. success.com/article/stop-overthinking-it-9-ways-to-make-decisions-withconfidence, Young Entrepreneur Council, 2016. Stereotype Threat Stereotype Threat in Men on a Test of Social Sensitivity by Anne M. Koenig and Alice H. Eagly https://link.springer.com/content/pdf/10.1007%2Fs11199-0053714-x.pdf, Sex Roles, 2005. Whistling Vivaldi: How Stereotypes Affect Us and What We Can Do by Claudia Steele. W. W. Norton & Company, 2011. The Secret to Success Four Ways to Maintain Momentum by Mel Robbins. https://www.success.com/ article/4-ways-to-maintain-momentum, Success, 2017. Work-Life Balance Work Life Balance. http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/work-life-balance. Mental Health America. Networking How To Network More Effectively by Victor Lipman. https://www.forbes.com/ sites/victorlipman/2018/01/09/how-to-network-more-effectively/#f6f70c93f564, Fortune, 2018. Email Notes and Memos Most Emails Answered in Just Two Minutes, Study Finds by Liz Neporent. http://abcnews.go.com/Health/emails-answered-minutes-study-finds/ story?id=30280230, ABC News, 2015. Organize to Prioritize Twenty-One Tips to Organize Your Office and Get More Done by Royale Scuderi. http://www.lifehack.org/articles/productivity/21-tips-to-organize-your-officeand-get-more-done.html, Lifehack, 2016. Rejuvenation 5-Minute Easy Self-Care Choices for Daily Rejuvenation by Ruth Lera. https:// www.elephantjournal.com/2016/01/5-minute-easy-self-care-choices-for-dailyrejuvenation/, Elephant Journal, 2016. Team Culture How Psychology Can Make You A Better Boss by Cheryl Connor. http://www. forbes.com/sites/cherylsnappconner/2013/09/01/how-psychology-can-make-youa-better-boss/#4faa402bc383, Forbes, 2013. Leadership for Innovation Through the Lens of the Psychological Situation by Kevin J. Corcoran and Debra K. Mooney, Journal of Leadership Studies, vol. 9(3), p 88-89, 2015.

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Hardiness Turning Lemons into Lemonade: Hardiness Helps People Turn Stressful Circumstances into Opportunities http://www.apa.org/research/action/lemon. aspx. American Psychological Association, 2003. Generational Influences 3 Ways Gen Z Will Start to Change the Workplace in 2018 by Pranam Lipinski. https://www.hrtechnologist.com/articles/performance-management/3-waysgen-z-will-start-to-change-the-workplace-in-2018/, HR Technologist, 2018. Heading A Meet Four Ways to Lead in Meetings When You’re Not the Meeting Leader by Jo Miller. http://womensleadershipcoaching.blogspot.com/2013/07/four-ways-tolead-in-meetings-when.html, Women’s Leadership Coaching, 2013. Leading for Impact Seven Ways to Align Employee and Organizational Goals by Cheryl Gittens. http://www.nationnews.com/nationnews/news/32288/align-employeeorganizational-goals, NationNews, 2012. Being Inclusive Microaggressions: More Than Just Race by Derald Wing Sue. https://www. psychologytoday.com/blog/microaggressions-in-everyday-life/201011/ microaggressions-more-just-race, Psychology Today, 2010. Hiring 7 Ways to Improve Your Hiring Process by Sammi Caramela. https://www. businessnewsdaily.com/7155-startup-hiring-tips.html. Business News Daily, 2018. Giving Performance Feedback How to Provide Feedback that Helps Employees Improve by Susan M Heathfield. Https://www.thebalancecareers.com/provide-feedback-that-has-animpact-1916642, The Balance Careers, 2018. Receiving Performance Feedback Receive Feedback with Grace and Dignity by Susan Ml. Heathfield. https://www.thebalancecareers.com/receive-feedbackwith-grace-and-dignity-1916643, The Balance Careers, 2017. Optimism 10 Signs of a Positive Workplace by Linnda Durré. https://www.monster.com/ career-advice/article/10-signs-positive-workplace, Monster. Colleagueship Transcollegial Leadership: A New Paradigm for Leadership by David J. Burns and Debra K. Mooney, International Journal of Educational Management, v32 n1 p57-70 2018.

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Seal the Deal See Meghan Markle’s Royal Coat of Arms and All of the Symbols Hiding Within by Jenni Avins. https://qz.com/1289668/meghan-markles-coat-of-arms-is-atribute-to-her-california-roots/. Quartz, 2018. Meta Reflection Looking Inwards: How Self-Reflection Strengthens Leaders by Beth A. Miller. https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/20140910151050-240215-looking-inwards-howself-reflection-strengthens-leaders, 2014. Discrimination The U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission, https://www.eeoc.gov/.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR Dr. Debra Mooney is the Vice President for Mission and Identity/Chief Mission Officer at Xavier University, a licensed clinical psychologist, and founder of Dry Moon LLC. (See her professional coat of arms below.) With more than 30 years of experience facilitating, coaching, and mentoring for high impact leading, she is the author of Leadership Mastery and Moxie: A Guide and Journal for Career Women and has publications in academic journals, including The International Journal of Education Management and The Journal of Leadership Studies.

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