Dear Readers,

While speaking with my friend recently, we realized that we are “list people.” We both like making lists and crossing things off our lists. The difference between our list-making is that I love to do it the old-fashioned way – putting pen to paper. She, on the other hand, is a big believer in using her phone to help her itemize everything she has to do and then checking tasks off as they’re completed.

I’ve appreciated the art of list-making since I was young. I remember coming home from school each Friday and asking my mother for a list of chores that I needed to do before Shabbos. This way, I figured, I’d know what I had to do in advance. She would sit down and write down all my tasks – dusting, Windexing, vacuuming – whatever had to be done that Friday. But she’d also slip in a few fun items – jump up and down five times or do a little dance. I’d look at my list and find the fun things to do. But I wouldn’t wait until the end to have some fun. I made sure to do them right away – because then I could cross them quickly off my list.

Fast forward a few years, and I’m still making lists. It helps me to remember what has to get done and frees up my mind – if I know that it’s on my list, I don’t have to keep track of that task in my head.

But I’m not always good at crossing things off my list. I’ve noticed that there are some tasks that stay on my to-do lists perpetually. I know that they have to get done but there’s no urgency to complete them, and so they are almost forever stuck on the back burner, waiting for when I have the time and drive to complete them. Perhaps the summer would be a good time to cross those things off my list?

There’s an age-old question when it comes to getting things done. Do you tackle the small, easier tasks first, or do you complete the harder, bigger projects right away?

Well, for me, it depends on the day. Sometimes, I want to cross off as many tasks as possible in the shortest amount of time. That’s when I quickly do those little things first. But on other days, when I know there are more complex items that need to be done, I’ll tackle those first. And research shows that those who take on the bigger, harder projects first will be more productive in the long run.

I sometimes encourage my kids, when they complain about doing something, to “eat the frog.” Supposedly, the expression comes from Mark Twain, who once said that if you eat a live frog first thing in the morning, you can go through your day knowing that it will probably be the worst thing you’ll have to do all day. But I’m not telling my kids to eat toads instead of toast for breakfast. The expression has come to mean that we should tackle the hard projects that we have to do at the first opportunity to do them. And research has shown that by doing the harder, more complex projects first, we’ll be able to get more things done overall.

So perhaps one day I should take those older, larger tasks that are sitting on the back burner of my to-do list and do them first thing in the morning. That way, one day, I’ll really be able to cross everything off my list. Wishing you a wonderful week, Shoshana

Yitzy Halpern, PUBLISHER publisher@fivetownsjewishhome.com

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Friday, June 2 Parshas Naso

Candle Lighting: 8:02 pm

Shabbos Ends: 9:11 pm

Rabbeinu Tam: 9:34 pm

Dear Editor,

Last week, I decided that it was time to email a few doctors some of my top medical treatment annoyances. I’ve decided to share the list with you, because I’m sure that some of you have the same or similar ones.

Your automated phone menu says that the options have recently changed. No, they haven’t. They’re the same confusing options in the same order the same way for the past 15 years.

You say to stay on hold because my call is very important to you. Having me wait 30 minutes for someone to quickly say, “Doctor’s office, please hold” is one sure way to indicate that I’m of no importance to you, at all.

The recording says that if it’s an emergency, hang up and call 911. Are your patients really that stupid? I can pretty much guarantee that the lady who’s fallen and can’t get up didn’t first call her physical therapist.

When you send me an on-line form and I check “male” for gender, why do you ask me if I’m pregnant or plan to be pregnant? Seriously, it’s an on-line form. Aren’t computers supposed to figure things out for you?

When you say, “The doctor will see you now,” I don’t want to sit for 20 minutes in a cold room while the doctor takes a break.

I never want to hear the doctor say, “I’ve never seen this before.” It makes me think that the doctor slept during that critical lecture, or he’s begging me to join his next clinical study.

I think you get the idea. I’m sure that there are others to add to the list. If you’re a doctor reading this, I’ll email you my bill for my services.

Daniel Feldman

Dear Editor, A satire:

The archaic writing style of the Constitution can render it difficult to read and understand, so it’s no surprise that a large contingent of Americans aren’t remotely familiar with the document. And this isn’t just true of Americans in general, but it’s also true of President Biden – although for an even more bizarre reason.

It turns out Biden has been reading the Constitution upside-down this entire time. It was only recently that members of his cabinet noticed this and showed the president the correct way of reading it. Now, whenever Biden’s handlers give him a copy of the Constitution, they glue a copy to his hands so he’ll know exactly how to hold it.

Rafi Metz

Dear Editor,

A golden escalator once changed a political system. A political system that was tried and failed. Many stairways leading to a stage have been the root of failures. All it took was for one man and one movement to descend a golden escalator to change the course of history. The age of a political creature ascending a pair of stairs to reach a stage where they would announce four more years of defending a failed system has ended. The age of a golden escalator has begun.

Donald John Trump was and is a hero. 74,223,975 Americans are heroes for voting to end a system that claimed to be on their side for decades. Ronald Dion DeSantis is a trailblazer of the new movement. The 2024 Republican Primary is about to begin. The fireworks are about to explode. The golden escalator that once changed the political system of the United States of America escalated its fight seven years ago. The man that descended that escalator made a lot of promises and, though uncharacteristically for a politician, kept many of them.

Donald Trump

Continued on page 10

Continued from page 8 argued that a system that failed a diverse amount of individuals means that loyalty wasn’t owed. The pattern of voting for failure didn’t have to continue. On November 8, 2016, America discontinued an entire system of despair and elected a government of hope and promise. The actual change in government occurred on January 20, 2017 at noon. The next four years were unusual, but in this context, unusual was good. Despite the unusualness of a politician fighting for his voters, every moment was met with resistance by the lies of the former power class; from politicians, journalists, and bureaucrats to “non-partisan” individuals. They coordinated an investigation on President Donald Trump based on a lie, but the president plowed on for the change that he promised.

On November 7, 2020, the same power-hungry creatures “elected” a new president. Whether it was due to fraud, election rigging, or lies, Joseph Robinette Biden Jr. currently occupies the Oval Office. The age of the political creature ascending a stage to announce four more years of failure is back. Four years after the very same country discontinued a pattern of voting for failure, the country “elects” the person who represented the past but is now the present. The problems of the past are back in their own 2023 form, but stronger than ever. The age of inflation, wars, drugs, crime, open borders, race wars, and the age of false being labeled true has arrived. The problems came back so quickly, it makes one wonder, was the election of Donald Trump an actual response to the systematic problems? If it was, shouldn’t there be some resistance in the system that we all were led to believe changed?

What if this political game is bigger than President, Vice President, Speaker, or Majority Leader? Is it perhaps the po- litical creatures that affect us the most, the ones that we focus on the least? The local school boards, town boards, state legislatures, and governors have more say in our lives than an 80- year-old confused man. Recent data has revealed that only approximately 15-27% of voters vote in the local elections that affect them the most. The lowest a presidential election on the other hand has received was 49%. The golden escalator, the stairs to the stage, and the 80-year-old man are entertaining, but what actually matters? How many candidates are debating in the upcoming Republican primary or if children will be educated and not indoctrinated in schools? The shiny objects of the presidency, Congress, and the like are the cream on top of the cake. The cake though first must be baked.

Sincerely,

Donny Simcha Guttman

Dear Editor,

As a mother of a few teens, I have to applaud you for your wonderful “Teen Talk” column. In many of your articles, you tackle very spot-on questions that bother teens and leave them wondering.

I have a very good relationship with my children. They come to me with so many of their thoughts and questions. But I know that there are probably questions that they have that they are too embarrassed to even address with me. A column like Teen Talk is so important so they can hear that other teens have questions too, and they can hear from your wonderful panelists who can give their insights and advice.

I’ve noticed that a lot of teens have questions or trouble with self-esteem. I believe that this is an important topic to address in your upcoming column.

Thank you,

A Mother of Teens