6 minute read
Parenting Pearls
Freedom!
by Sara rayvych, MSed
Freedom! Throughout Pesach, the word “freedom” kept revolving through my mind. The events of yetzias Mitzrayim were definitely one of the reasons, but there was more to it. In New York, Pesach time truly is Chag HaAviv. It signals the beautiful spring weather and a chance for everyone, particularly the children, to once again be free outdoors.
Each year, we step out of our weather-induced hibernation period, ready to once again meet our neighbors, see how tall their kids grew, and remind ourselves that life exists beyond our immediate property.
Being physically active is important for everyone. The physical and emotional benefits are well-known. Kids, in particular, need to move and be active. The littlest of bodies are the most energetic. I know I’m not the only adult who has wanted to bottle a bit of that energy to keep myself going. There’s clearly a reason adults drink coffee and kids don’t.
Now is the perfect time to lovingly push those little people out the door and encourage them to run in the fresh air. They can bike, scoot, or just roll around. If all goes well, they’ll come back a little dirtier but with bigger smiles.
On the opposite side, I’m not the only one that’s noticed the increased usage of “screens” among kids. Unfortunately, it feels like everything electronic has become a bit hefker. Even those families that prioritize limiting tablet time have still found that kids have somehow gotten much more time on screens than they used to get. Those sneaky devices have wiggled their way into everything!
During the cold months, it’s harder to keep kids entertained, and screens too easily take over. Now, with the outdoors starting to thaw, it’s the perfect opportunity to turn off the electronics and turn on the outdoor adventures.
Rather than focus too much time discussing screentime, I thought I’d share a little story.
One of the classes towards my master’s degree had an online discussion board we had to comment on as part of our coursework. I forget the exact topic, but it had to do with the usage of screens, which back then mostly referred to television – this was the olden days. In my post, I wrote how there were concerns not just with some of the content but also the medium of television. Whatever I wrote must have been pretty good because I got full credit, “5/5,” but the teacher included a little note saying that I can’t make such a broad statement about the medium being problematic on its own. After all, she argued, there was educational content available, too. I can’t say where I got the nerve, but I politely sent back a respectful message, along with a link to the site where I had found the original studies I cited. She returned to me the message “6/5” – I had received extra credit.
She may not have agreed with me, but she had the integrity to respect that my response had scientific backing. Therefore, I will simply share with you the source I provided to my professor years ago. Please see “The Truth About Television” on Aish.com by Rabbi Lawrence Kelemen or read the original in his book To Kindle A Soul.
Benefits of Physical Activity
I feel slightly foolish writing the benefits of exercise because they’re so obvious to most of us. Therefore, I won’t spend too much time on this. It is sufficient to say that kids need exercise, too, and running around outdoors, playing sports, chasing each other, or running aimlessly are all great forms of exercise. We know that we all need to be active. My little ones would sleep the best after a good day at the park. They’d run, jump, get it all out on the playground equipment, and then come home ready for bed. Ah, it was truly beautiful.
I remember being told by both a therapist and pediatrician that increased physical activity, rather than dieting, was the way to help children attain a healthy weight. Being active also reduces the likelihood of developing Type 2 diabetes, along with many other diseases. While any health concerns should be discussed with your child’s healthcare provider, all children benefit
from some good physical activity. While increased physical exertion is beneficial for getting to, or maintaining, a healthy weight, please don’t suggest it as such to your child. I can’t see it as being emotionally healthy to tell a child they need to exercise to lose weight. The negative effects of focusing on a child’s weight are real and need to be considered before mentioning anything weight-related.
Exercise is emotionally beneficial, too, and reduces stress and the symptoms of depression. Physical activity improves both focus and concentration, along with just being fun.
Structure vs. Freestyle
Children benefit from a balance of structured play and unstructured, free time. This applies both outdoors and indoors, and the balance varies by the child. Some children really do require more structure which can provide them with security and guidance, while others need to follow their own, internal guide to create the games that interest them. Allow your child and your personality to be your guide in creating that harmony.
There’s also a beautiful gray area of semi-structured activity that can be an excellent fit for many. Having a few prompts or ideas to go along with suggested activities can do a lot to fend off the “I’m bored” (pronounced “boooooooooooorrrrrred”) that can quickly set in. For example, putting out some crayons and paper can be enough to occupy some children. Other children
Safety
As we start a new season, take a few minutes to remind your children about outdoor safety. It’s been a long
time since they’ve had the run of the outdoors. This includes safely crossing the street, correct usage of helmets and safety equipment, and stranger danger. Give children clear parameters on how far away from your house they’re permitted to go. Clear guidelines such as “blue fence” or “the Feiners’ house” are
benefit from some loose suggestions as to what to draw, while others require a formal project.
It can be helpful to have some gentle suggestions of activities for those more hesitant to venture outside. Having chalk, some form of riding (bikes, roller blades or scooters), or sports equipment more meaningful than “don’t go too far.”
Young children automatically run after items to retrieve them, even if the ball or toy rolls into the street. Be extra cautious where you set them up to play, especially if the game involves a ball, frisbee, or similar item. You want little ones in a location where those items are unlikely to reach the road.
Drivers should be extra careful when driving in residential areas. Children may be out, and extra precautions are necessary. If you see a ball or other toy fly into the street, stop or slow down your car and ensure little ones aren’t following it.
Enjoy the beautiful weather, take a walk with your child, and create the memories that outdoor activities induce.
Have a wonderful Shabbos!
Please daven for a refuah sheleima for Yechiel Meir ben Sarah.
Sara Rayvych, MSEd, has her master’s in general and special education. She has been homeschooling for over 10 years in Far Rockaway. She can be contacted at RayvychHomeschool@gmail.com.
