Dignity for the body, peace for the soul

By Malka Forshner, SW Florida Chevra Kadisha

My first encounter with Chevra Kadisha (Jewish Burial Society) was when my mother passed away 24 years ago. I was clueless. All I knew was that “they” would take care of “everything.” And they did, quickly, quietly and professionally. She was buried according to our age-old traditions — simple shrouds, no makeup, no fancy casket, in-ground burial — as our ancestors have done since the very first Jew, Abraham, purchased the field of the Machpela in Hebron to bury his wife, Sara.

Fast forward to 10 years ago, when I was asked to attend a training session for prospective members of the Chevra Kadisha — a job I never thought I’d do but remembered four Jewish women did for my mother somewhere in the Greater Washington, D.C. area. Now it was my turn to do the mitzvah.

So, what’s the deal with Jewish burial? We all really need to know, since there is a shockingly high rate of cremation, not just in the population at large but within our Jewish community. One or two generations ago, this was unheard of. A generation of Jews was beyond shocked with grief when they heard the unfathomable report of the crematoriums of Nazi Germany. The notion of doing that to one of our own was unthinkable. Reform, conservative, orthodox or unaffiliated, we could not, would not, entertain such a plan.

But every generation has its challenges, and one of ours is insipid media pressure to consider the cremation option as 1) more ecological, 2) more suited to the demographics of parents and children not living in the same geographic area, 3) cleaner and quicker, and 4) cheaper (that last argument is the only valid one, but a myriad of Jewish organizations will help with that).

Fast forward to just a month ago, when we hosted an extensive training session for current and prospective members of this organization, right here, for residents of Collier, Lee, Charlotte and Sarasota counties. We were educated by the Florida representative of the National Association of Chevra Kadisha, Rabbi Jay Lyons (Nasck.org), a man of vast knowledge and sensitivity on the topic of Jewish burial and all it entails.

Why do you need to know about our organization, especially if you’ve never had the notion to perform this particular mitzvah? (You should know it’s the only mitzvah called “chesed shel emes” – “the kindness of truth,” since we can never expect to get the favor returned) You need to know about us because you’ll need our services. It’s for every Jew, and you shouldn’t assume that it happens automatically.

We are here for every Jew, and we hope that all your loved ones (and you) have the proper paperwork in place so that, when the time comes, there will be no concerns or delays about how everything should be done.

To quote a brochure written by the renowned Doron Kornbluth, author of “Cremation or Burial:” “Why should I care if I am dead anyway? Our bodies are a gift, and we have no right to hurt ourselves in life or death. Cremation is often chosen due to social or cultural influences based on misconceptions about its impact on our family, our soul, our environment and our Jewish traditions ... On a deeper … level, when a soul departs from its body … it has a much greater understanding of the spiritual implications of cremation. Looking “down” at its body, there is nothing a soul wants more than a proper Jewish burial. No matter how religious you were or weren’t, choosing burial means: you were born a Jew and want to be remembered as a Jew.”

Do you need help with this decision or finding the proper paperwork to make sure everything will go smoothly at the right time? Do you want reading material? We’re here to assist you in attaining dignity for the body and peace for the soul. Email us at swfloridachevrakadisha@gmail.com.