31 Parental Control - More on digital safety - it is so important

Parental Control

At what age should I give my child a phone? Psycotherapist Cathy Press shares some lessons in how to keep children safe on mobiles.

Getting a phone has become a rite of passage for children and teenagers. With Christmas just around the corner, a phone will be on many childs wishlist. But what is the best age to give them one? When you decide to give your child a phone is completely up to you and will be dependent on their maturity and how responsible they can be with it. Typically, children are given a phone at about the time they start secondary school, which in itself isn’t a problem, but the type they pester you for might be. Most children experience considerable peer pressure around getting a smart phone and will convey this to you until you give into the pressure. As adults the concerns we have about our children using smart phones is ironically not about the actual ability to make phone calls but as phones being the gateway to children being exposed to a view of the world they are not mature enough to see. Phones pose risks such as cyber bullying, exposure to all sorts of explicit and inappropriate content, making in-app purchases, sharing their personal data and potentially the parents data too and the inevitable addiction to tech due to excessive screen time. Setting up parental controls are a useful way forward and may ease your concerns. You can fi nd several really useful guides at parentsafe.lgfl .net. Th ere is also useful information to be found at these sites: saferinternet.org.uk and childnet.com. Do keep an open conversation with your child about the use of their phone and the potential risks. Th ey are more likely to come to you for assistance if they do have a problem or something unexpected happens. Make sure they know that there are conditions attached to them having a phone. Don’t forget that you can give your child a simple mobile which can only make calls and texts and if you consider your child will be safer all together with this option then try this for starts and see how responsible they can be with this in the fi rst instance.

Tips for keeping youR kids safe:

→ Make sure the phone has a secure password you both know → Check the age limits of all the apps they might have access to → Make sure their accounts are turned to private to ensure as much safety as is possible → Create content fi lters to block inappropriate content → Set limits on screen time → Encourage them not to answer any calls or texts from unknown numbers → Don’t post any personal information that can identity you, where you live or the school you go to (including photos with logos on school uniform) → Don’t befriend people you don’t know → Never send or do anything sexual online → Don’t meet up with anyone face-to-face if you have only met them online → Gran Alert- if you don’t want gran to see it, don’t post it → Tell them if they see something online that makes them feel uncomfortable, unsafe or worried, turn it off and tell an adult- remember you can mute or block people on social media

Cathy Press has been working as working as a psychotherapist and clinical supervisor for over 25 years, specialising in domestic and sexual violence and abuse related issues with children, young people and adults. Her book When Love Bites: A young person’s guide to escaping harmful, toxic and hurtful relationships is out now priced £14.99. Visit cathypress.co.uk

"We recommend that all parents install ParentShield on the device used by their child in order to safeguard and protect them”

Seema Solani, Principal at Haberdashers' Aske's Hatcham College, London

ParentShield is a special mobile network for children and has been designed to make life easier for schools as it gives parents the ability to completely disable mobile phone usage on their children's devices during school hours. With schools working together with their parents it enables the start of a constructive partnership regarding mobile phones and helps prevent confrontational situations that arise from confi scations. Confi scation or removal of mobile phones becomes unnecessary if the phone is set in ParentShield's "SchoolBlock" mode which completely disables all calls, SMS messages and ( most importantly! ) mobile data during School Hours. Returning the phone back to normal state after home time and allowing it to be used to call parents for lifts home etc. While in SchoolBlock mode the phone can still contact emergency services or the child's parents in emergency situations so relieves stress for children and increases peace of mind for parents yet removes the possibility of unwanted notifi cations in the classroom or access to social media and other distractions, improving classroom behaviour. ParentShield is the UK’s only Mobile Network designed specifi cally with children in mind, incorporating a wide range of tools - from call recording to keyword alerts - that allow parents to oversee their child’s phone usage without invading their privacy. It can work with any unlocked feature-phone, smartphone or smartwatch and does not require any app or parental controls to be set on the device. Its features are handled remotely, allowing for optimal convenience while kids retain their independence. Th e SIMs work across the UK and beyond. For more information visit for terms and tiers an packages: parentshield.co.uk