TALK ABOUT LIFE

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Is the old adage ‘live life to the full’ still the same when you have a life limiting condition? Yes, say experts.

Mersey Care’s Specialist Palliative Care teams work with other health professionals, patients and families when someone has a diagnosis of a life limiting illness.

Barbara Houghton, who leads palliative and end of life care across Mersey Care, says that, while open and honest conversations help families to fulfil someone’s wishes after they die, it’s equally important to help bring quality to their life right now.

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The teams can be involved with people in their final days, but they can be involved with the person and their family for a year or more before.

“None of us know how long we’re going to live, we might only think about what gives us fulfilment when we learn it may not be as long as we’d hoped,” says Barbara.” We can have those conversations and help put things in place that will give quality to the person’s life.”

Conversations are sometimes about bucket lists – living a full life right till the end. Barbara recalls one patient who knew her diagnosis was life limiting and wanted to go on a cruise. The team worked with doctors to ensure she could continue her treatment on the ship.

She shares the story of another patient who loved gardening but was no longer able to get into his garden.

“This man’s spirituality came through tending his plants. When he shared his distress at not being able to plant up seedlings, his occupational therapist arranged a potting bench. He spent spring potting up seedlings, which his young grandson then planted out in the garden, under his grandad’s direction. They were able to spend time together in summer watching them grow.

“He still had a palliative diagnosis, he knew he was going to die at some point, but he spent his days doing what he loved most with the people he loved – it brought quality to his life.”

It seems that doing what you love is not just about living well, but also dying well.

Barbara explains: “Conversations towards the end of someone’s life can affect whether they have a peaceful death. A gentleman in his final weeks of life had enjoyed playing piano for relaxation. He was missing it terribly, so we arranged for piano music to be played. It gave him what he needed in those moments.

“We take care to assess what someone needs to discuss, work with their beliefs and needs and try to understand what they already know to make sure what we say and do is not harmful” says Barbara.

“Some people are pragmatic and ready for what lies ahead, but others have dilemmas; they may feel their faith has let them down or they struggle coming to terms with leaving loved ones. Those are difficult issues to discuss, and we can ask for help from psychologists or religious or spiritual leaders.”

Is it as challenging for health professionals to raise issues as it is for the rest of us?

“It can be difficult” says Barbara, “but having conversations means no one is left pondering a dilemma from something that’s not been discussed.”

For More Information

Dying Matters Awareness Week runs from May 8 to 14. The campaign aims to make it easy and more comfortable for people to talk about their death and concerns after their death. hospiceuk.org/our-campaigns/dying-matters/dying-matters-awareness-week

NEED SUPPORT?

• Help yourself – our range of self help guides on bereavement and various subjects can be read online, downloaded or watched as a video.

merseycare.nhs.uk/self-help-guides