Kamloops Momma Issue 1 by Kamloops Momma Magazine

Getting Through the Bad Days

always wanted kids. In fact, as a child I thought that 6 sounded like a good number. Perhaps I was slightly delusional because I have only one sibling myself and always wanted more. I even married a man who thought six was good, too. Well, I have to admit that number was quickly reduced after my first arrived! It‘s not that the rewards of parenthood didn‘t live up to my expectations. It was and continues to be even more gratifying than I could have ever imagined. The instant my daughter was placed in my arms, I felt like I was part of a special club. I finally knew exactly what people meant when they said ‗you don‘t know love until you have children.‘ But the reality is that some days are Letter from simply less rewarding than others. Like the day when my daughter got into my make-up and, after coating her face with a Kamloops lipstick, proceeded to decorate the walls; or when she pulled every photo down Momma from the photo collage I had spent nearly a week creating; or the camping trip when she had one tantrum after another and told a very nice little boy that she didn‘t like him. There are times when I wonder how I will make it through the day, but the amazing thing about parenting is how easily a bad day can turn around. For me, ―I love you, Momma,‖ is all it takes. It‘s a simple phrase, yet, sometimes I think that it could cure all the woes of the world. Every parent has something that helps them get through the tough days; something that reminds them why they became a parent. For me, being reassured that I have my daughter‘s unconditional love makes a few hours cleaning lipstick off walls seem insignificant. So, what helps you get through the bad days? We hope Kamloops Momma will become one of the things that makes parenting a little easier. Our goal is to connect the local parenting community and we‘d like your help to do it. If you have an idea, story, article, photo, or even recipe that you want to share, we‘d love to hear from you. You never know what might turn someone else‘s day around! — Courtney Charlton, editor To share your ideas and comments, please contact us at info@kamloopsmomma.com

On the Cover: Three year old Evalee beams from ear to ear on a beautiful sunny Kamloops day. Okay, so that`s not exactly true...this ―summer‖ shot was taken during a severe storm warning and the smile is not because of the flowers; it‘s because she was just promised a Barbie horse. Parenting is all about improvisation and so is photography! Photo by Christina Grono, owner of The Art We Are Artisan Market. It‘s a great place to relax, check out local art, and eat innovative, delicious food. The Art We Are is located at 201-322 Victoria Street, 250-828-7998.

www.kamloopsmomma.com 3

A Look Inside Kamloops Momma... Are You Having Fun Yet?

Encouraging creativity the guilt-free way

Nature Play

Stepping stones for a healthy connection with nature

Get Connected

A guide to local parent-child groups this summer

Freshen Up

Lad’s Restaurant, Merritt, puts a fresh twist on old favourites

Community Business Directory

A directory of local businesses for you and your family

The Beheaded Princess Doll

A dad’s parenting perspective

Play, Learn, and Explore

The Kamloops Children’s Museum

A Natural Power to Parent

Creating a healthy relationship with your child

Skin Matters

What’s in your child’s skincare products?

Secrets from a Little Green Bus 16 Planning a family daytrip to Sun Peaks Resort

Parent Q&A

Elizabeth deVries, kamloopsparents.com

Community Events Calendar

Find out what’s going on in our community

Kamloops Momma

is the fun, reliable publication connecting local families to each other and to our community. We provide information about regional events, resources and businesses, as well as articles intended to inspire, enlighten, and empower parents and caregivers. As a local resource, we want our community to get involved. We encourage and accept submissions from any person, business, or organization sharing our goal to strengthen our parenting community. Kamloops Momma is published bi-monthly and available for free at businesses and organizations throughout our region. Readers can also download the magazine online and subscribe to have it delivered right to their door.

Kamloops Momma Magazine Published by Courtney Charlton, Editor Contact: 778-472-0020 info@kamloopsmomma.com www.kamloopsmomma.com “Kamloops Momma Magazine” name and content

©Copyright 2010 by Kamloops Momma Magazine, Editor Courtney Charlton. All rights reserved. No written or illustrated part of this magazine may be reproduced, except brief quotations in articles or reviews, without permission from the editor and individual authors.

Are You Having Fun Yet? Encouraging creativity the guilt-free way By Janet Whitehead

h, Momma—the guilt of it all! You've been inundated with parenting advice meant to nourish the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual growth of your child. And within that information is a fabulous array of advice for supporting your child's play, imagination and creativity. After all, play is the child's work. Not only is it their way to process and make sense of the world, it is also their way to discover, explore, and develop their passions and gifts. And you get to be the support system for that. Uh-huh. Some days you're just darn happy you actually fed your kids. But the guilt weighs heavy when you haven't played on the floor with them, when you let them watch more than the recommended time of TV or when you haven't had family story time every night, let alone in the past month. But now we get to find a kinder and gentler way for you to acknowledge and support your child's creativity. Less is more. These ideas are simple to implement… so simple you'll almost feel guilty. But please don't. We're trying to reduce that load for you.

1. Simple words. Huge value. Remember hearing these words as a child: "Stop playing, it's time for lunch." "Oh, it's just your imagination." "That's not going to make you a living"? Now, what about acknowledging creative play, thoughts and ideas instead? "Let's fuel that body of yours with food so you can keep on playing." "Time to get back to playing now!" "All the great inventors in the world had good imaginations, too." "Are you having fun, honey?" If you do blurt out something unsupportive when your child has creatively redone the couch in yellow paint… well, you're human. Later you can acknowledge the creative aspect, as well as the value of involving you prior to painting things like couches.

2. Support your child's natural inclinations. It's the path of least resistance; but, more than that, supporting your child‘s natural inclinations inspires your child to feel safe exploring what they love. Consider the little girl who wants to play princess and, yes, have a prince show up to save the day. We want our daughters to be independent, strong and able to change a tire with one hand. But by discouraging, even in quiet ways, the little girl who loves to play princess, she begins to doubt her choices, passion, imagination, and her natural gravitation towards what she loves. So, if your daughter wants to play princess or your son only wants to play with cars, you don't have to feel like you

must redirect them. They are developing some aspect of themselves that is important, even if we aren't quite sure what that is. You are supporting their development more by letting them play their way. Isn't that a relief?

3. The Line Doodle. Some children like colouring books and that's okay. Do offer them a variety of blank paper and drawing tools, but know that showing up to a blank page can be as intimidating to a child as it is to an adult. You can get things started by squiggling a random line on the page and saying, "What could you turn this into, I wonder?‖

4. "What if…" questions. Whisper "what if" questions in a conspiring way to capture your child's interest. Excellent times to do this are shopping, in waiting rooms, and at group activities not conducive to creative play. Just ask the question. No follow through is required, although a round of shared storytelling might evolve! ―What if you imagined switching Grandpa's nose with baby cousin's nose?‖ ―What if this store sold rocket ships?‖ ―What if all of the people waiting for the doctor were animals/dinosaurs/cars? ― ―What if all the vegetables had personalities? I wonder what they'd say.‖

5. Playing with your child is valuable and sometimes boring. Sometimes you catch yourself wanting to be doing just about anything else but playing! So, why not try to remember what you loved to do as a child and choose to play that with your child? Savour it like going to a spa and value it like serving a dinner of 5 vegetables that your child actually ate. You loved etch-a-sketch? Do that. If you loved to make forts, make forts. If you loved imagining wondrous adventures while playing in nature, see if you can bring that spirit back on your outdoor walks. If story time really is your favourite thing, make it the ONE thing that you decide to do regularly. Here's one more 'what if': What if you told yourself, "Wow, I'm a great parent" while you curled up with a good book at the end of a much less guilt ridden day? Imagine how good that could feel. Janet Whitehead is a certified life coach and creativity coach. www.musingsandmud.com 5

Nature Play: Stepping Stones for a Healthy Connection with Nature By Sherry Robinson

or many children, nature can actually be strange and scary. How many are afraid of bees, for example? Yet, we aren‘t born afraid of bees, so how do we become fearful? Is it just because we are told to avoid bees or maybe because we see our role models freak out and so we take on that fear too? Fear can be learned and unquestioned. Fear of the unknown can happen ―A growing easily, regardless of age; but through exrespect and ploration and discovery, we can reduce love for nature many of our children‘s fears. A great place can also to start is the public library. When my oldest son was three years motivate a old he asked, ―How do bees make desire to care honey?‖ We headed to the library and for our found several picture books all about environment.‖ bees. He was so excited that he sang a simple happy chant, ‗Bees make honey,‘ all the way home. Naturally, his curiosity led to discovering slugs…he even had a jar with slugs on his bedside table! For each new interest, we simply repeated the adventure and visited the library. We also fed his curiosity by venturing outdoors. We can easily share and explore our wonderment for nature with our children by pretending to go on an

adventure in the grass, under a tree, or looking through handmade toilet paper roll binoculars. In these moments, we engage our children‘s creativity by giving the freedom to experiment, ask questions, and not worry about whether it works out or not. We can also model a sense of curiosity. The easiest way we can do this is by asking aloud, ―I wonder...?‖ Even if we know the answer, asking the question opens up a space for curiosity and allows our child to pause and wonder as well. When children develop an attachment or connection to Mother Nature, they more naturally pay attention and seek comfort or pleasure from time outdoors. A growing respect and love for nature can also motivate a desire to care for our environment. There has never been a more important time for our children to connect with nature because of the reality of environmental threats and damage. Children of all ages are questioning if there is hope and seeking security from our answers and reactions. They do sense our worry and sometimes our feelings of hopelessness. Although it might be natural for us to want to shelter our children from hearing such sad or depressing news or deny that it really matters to us, we can give them opportunities to overcome these fears instead. Interacting with nature provides this opportunity. Spending time in quiet nature can be just sitting in a backyard watching bees land from flower to flower, walking barefoot in the dirt, listening to the sound of feet stomping and creating clouds of dust, or noticing the moments of silence and listening to the shushing wind stirring the leaves along the forest floor. When we slow down enough to notice the quiet nature of sand between our toes, or a weed growing from a crack in the pavement, a moment can easily stretch into a half hour, or hours can easily pass by. Nature play does not need to cost money. Keep it simple and fun!

Two curious girls, ages 2 and 4, discover an insect while spending the day hiking with their mom. Photo: Sherry Robinson

Great (free!) Places to Connect with Nature in Kamloops P- Preschool Children S- School Aged Children -Public Washroom

-Wheelchair Accessible

Lower Peterson Creek, Downtown P/S/ - Turn onto Glenfair Road from Columbia Street and follow road to parking lot. - There are easy flat trails, bridges and a shallow creek with shade. - Dirt trails better suited for older school aged children can be followed under the orange bridge. Leads to a waterfall and uphill to Lower Sahali. Upper Peterson Creek, Upper Sahali P/S - Turn onto Whiteshield Crescent off Summit Drive and enter the parking lot with a trail map. The map points out easier trails. or - Park further up Whiteshield past the Condos and enter a trail. - There are various flat dirt trails to explore and many cliff side trails too. - Children need to be supervised when near steep cliffs.

Stomping through Peterson Creek is a great way for a 2 year old to have fun and connect with nature. Photo: Sherry Robinson Nature play provides experiences that bring about wonderment, curiosity, and creativity. When we provide opportunities to become familiar with things that were once strange or scary, we prepare our children for understanding larger environmental challenges in their future. It also provides stepping-stones towards a healthy connection with nature and can help ensure our children are developmentally prepared to meet the challenges of a rapidly changing world. Creativity inspired by nature itself will be an essential skill towards living more sustainable lifestyles for future generations to come! Sherry Robinson is the mother of two grown sons. She has a Diploma in Early Childhood Education and a deep interest in Ecopsychology, photography, and nature. www.noticequietnature.blogspot.com.

Rivers Trail, Downtown, S. Thompson River P/S/ / - Enter from Lorne Street at Pioneer Park or Riverside Park. - There is a flat paved trail with rolling grassy hills great for physical activity and short trails with naturalized trees, grasses and flowers to hide in and explore. Shubert Drive, North Shore, N. Thompson River P/S/ - Paved walking path is all along Shubert Drive. - There are various short dirt trails that lead down to the river shore. - There is some shade. Rivers Trail, Westsyde Dike, N. Thompson River P/S/ / -Enter the dike from Oakhills Road. - For older children able to walk on dirt paths, turn right through a forested area with trails through tall grass and willows. or - Stay on the dike and head left wheel chair accessible an easy walk with preschool to school aged children. Dike path ends at Centennial Park where there is an animal farm.

“If a child is to keep his inborn sense of wonder, he needs the companionship of at least one adult who can share it, rediscovering with him the joy, excitement and mystery of the world we live in.” - Rachel Carson, marine biologist and nature writer 7

GET CONNECTED: A guide to local parent-child groups this summer Kamloops Connexions

As parents, it can be very easy to get caught up in a world of diapers, Dora, and dishes. Sometimes it might even seem like you’ve forgotten what it’s like to have an adult conversation. Here are some great programs that not only give you a chance to meet other parents, but also give your children a chance to meet other kids.

Child Interactive Play and Learn Center

What: A drop-in group for moms looking to build meaningful relationships

What: A drop in playgroup for caregivers and children ages 0-6

When: Fri 9:30—whenever (June-Sept)

Includes circle time, crafts, and a wide selection of toys and activities

Where: Prince Charles Park, Downtown Cost: Free

When: Mon-Fri 9-12

Contact: 250-377-6890

Where: Southwest Y: Unit E, 1420 Hugh Allan drive

* Fall and winter group is held at the Southwest Community Church and childcare is available

Attachment Parenting What: A playgroup for parents/ caregivers of children 0-5 with an interest in topics such as cloth diapering, babywearing, co-sleeping, and extended breastfeeding When: Twice a month - days vary Where: Locations vary

Cost: Free w/ Y membership or $3 drop-in Cost: Free + food for potluck Contact: 250-376-4723 or Contact: 250-372-7791 AP_kamloops-owner@yahoogroups.com

Family Tree Drop-in

Nobody’s Perfect Parenting Program

Healthy Beginnings

What: A drop-in playgroup for high priority families to expand their social network while increasing their awareness of the importance of early childhood development. Includes circle time, crafts, and healthy snacks

What: A program for parents of children ages 0-5. Provides the opportunity to discuss and share parenting experiences. Led by 2 trained facilitators

What: A community-based drop-in group for parents/caregivers and their children ages 0-6

When: Mon and Wed 9-4 Where: 283 West Victoria St. Cost: Free Contact: 250-377-6890

When: July 6-22—Tues/Thurs 10-12

Where: Interior Indian Friendship Society 2355 Parkcrest Ave

Where: Southwest Y (CCRR): Unit E, 1420 When: Tues 9:45-11:45 Hugh Allan drive Thurs 10:30-12:30 Cost: Free. Incl. snacks, childminding, and Cost: Free transportation Contact: 250-554-3134 Contact: 250-372-7791

Summer Storytime What: A drop-in story time for parents/ caregivers and their children ages 2-5 Where: Kamloops Library When: July 8-Aug 26, Thurs 10:15-10:45 Contact: 250-372-5145 Where: North Kamloops Library When: July 9-Aug 27, Fri 10:15-10:45 Contact: 250-554-1124 Cost: Free 8

FRESHEN UP AT

LAD’S RESTAURANT, MERRIT

t‘s summer road trip season: the time of year when we pack up our children, squeeze our life‘s belongings into one vehicle, and set off on an adventure. Here in Kamloops, the vacation possibilities seem endless, but whether going to Victoria or Seattle, a road trip often means at least one stop in Merritt. Now, most people don‘t consider Merritt a vacation destination; however, as anyone who has travelled the Coquihalla with children knows, Merritt has everything you need to keep you and your little ones happy: coffee, gas, washrooms, and food. But like most highway-side stops, Merritt has predominantly fast food options. Recently, however, a new restaurant opened that offers a fresh take on old favourites. Lad‘s Restaurant is a family-run business that “We’re basically prides itself on providing customers with fresh food taking stuff that and fresh taste. You won‘t find frozen hamburger patties and processed cheese here. Chef‘s Alan and everybody grew Laurie Warland make everything from the hamburger buns to the pasta in-house. up with and ―We‘re basically taking stuff that everybody grew making it as fresh up with and making it as fresh as possible,‖ says Laurie Warland. as possible.” The food is not only fresh; it is prepared by a team of chefs with 18 years combined culinary experience. Owner Debbra Marko started Lad‘s because she wanted her son and daughter-in-law, the chefs, to realize their culinary dreams: ―It‘s a chance for them to excel at what they are passionate about.‖ ―We have the freedom to do what we were taught to do,‖ says Alan Warland, recalling the frustrations he has felt cooking for restaurants that use premade sauces and pre-packaged foods. The Warland‘s call their food ―Mom‘s home cooking,‖ but I don‘t know a lot of moms that cook like this! The menu includes hearty favourites like burgers and clubhouses, along with more contemporary items like grilled vegetable wraps and bruschetta. And you don‘t have to stick to fries here (though you might want to because the fresh cut fries are great!). Side options also include four salads, daily soups, and enormous onion rings. The kids can enjoy their favourites, too. Chicken strips, grilled cheese, and burgers are all available, but they certainly won‘t taste like the fast food restaurants you passed on the way. As for dessert, you can try ice cream, a fudge brownie, an apple crumble, or a cinnamon bun – all made in-house, of course. And if you have dietary concerns or just a picky eater in the family, Lad‘s Restaurant will work with you to create a suitable meal. ―A lot of people have difficulty finding a restaurant to accommodate their needs, but to us, it‘s second nature,‖ says Laurie Warland. ―We want customers going away with a happy stomach.‖ Lad‘s Restaurant is located in the Travelodge at 3581 Voght Street, Merritt. It is open 7 days a week from 7am to 10pm. For more information, please contact Chef‘s Alan and Laurie Warland at 250-378-5231 or visit their website: ladsrestaurant.ca.

By Courtney Charlton

Red Pepper Soup: 4 red peppers 4 green peppers 1 small white onion 500 ml - 2 cups - 2% milk 500 ml - 2 cups - heavy cream Salt and pepper to taste Roast peppers until lightly charred on outside. Wash off char, core, cut in quarters and place in a pot. Chop onion into medium sized pieces, add to pot and sauté over medium heat until soft. Stir often. Stir milk and cream into pot. Let mixture heat up and reduce about 1 inch. Remove from heat and blend in a food processor or with a hand blender. Add salt and pepper to taste and enjoy! Note: For a cleaner, slightly thinner soup, you can strain the soup through a fine sieve. Soup can also be thinned by adding more milk.

Community Business Directory Children’s Stores and Services

Locally owned and operated

Family Fitness

Baby Canuck

Game-On Interactive Fitness

Saving Our Planet, One Change at a Time Cloth diapers and so much more. Custom orders and complete diapering packages 250.376.8997 www.babycanuck.ca

Putting the Fun into Fitness. All Ages, All Abilities, All FUN! 444 St Paul St 250.374.4263 www.gameoninteractivefitness.com

Kidsmart

Katts Gymnastics

Children’s Products You Can Trust Unique, safe, quality children‘s products To host a party or become a representative: 1.888.708.7630 www.kidsmartshop.ca

Sign up Now for fun 2010 Summer Programs! 7400 sq ft of great gymnastics fun 1-1121 12th St. (North Shore) 250.376.4113 www.kattsgymbc.com

Lizzie Bits Baby Co.

Food Services

Go Green! Use Cloth! Cloth diaper specialists. Unique children‘s items. High quality children‘s consignment. 7-111 Oriole Rd. 250.374.8706 lizziebaby.ca

Baking by Sandi Pies, loaves, squares, cookies, fudge, and more! Fresh homemade baking. We do custom orders! Sandi Riddell, 250.573.7664

Snug-Glee Bumz Diaper Service Happy Baby, Happy Planet Service includes diapers, pick-up, delivery, and laundering all for $22.96/week!

Health and Wellness

250.554.9722 snuggleebumz@gmail.com

Daycares

Mighty Oak Midwifery (Logo)

Enriched Daycare Aberdeen & Sahali Mall locations, 6am11pm 7 days/wk. Dance, fitness, music, science and more! Birthday Party Fun Spot! 250.377.8190 www.enricheddaycare.com

(Logo)

Musings and Mud Coaching Studio Life Coaching with a creative twist! Janet L. Whitehead, certified professional coach janet@musingsandmud.com 250.376.8402 www.musingsandmud.com

Over the Raynebow Family Daycare North Shore. Open 7am-5pm. School pickup and drop off. Daily outings. Contact Rayne Kelsey at 250.376.7262

Parenthood in the Making Childbirth Services Susanne Pytela, B.S.W. DONA trained birth and postpartum doula 250.572.6383 Susanne.pytela@gmail.com

Sunshine Family Daycare Reggio Program Art, aesthetics, yoga and more! Contact Evva at 250.374.1843

Dining Lad’s Restaurant Fresh Food, Fresh Taste Putting a fresh twist on your old favourites! 3581 Voght Street, Merritt 250.378.5231 Restaurant www.ladsrestaurant.ca

LAD’S

Personal, professional, woman-centered maternity care. Now accepting new patients! 250.377.8611 www.mightyoakmidwifery.ca

Twin Valley Wellness Centre (Logo)

Registered Massage Therapy Sports massage and rehabilitation Pre-natal and post-natal massage. Body cushion pregnancy system avail. 250.374.6396

Yoga with Katrina/Yoga Therapy Playful and empowering yoga classes Private and semi-private yoga therapy sessions. Align, feel good, and live fully! www.YogaWithKatrina.com 250.374.6493

Home-Based Sales Businesses

Photography and Art

Epicure Selections

Prairie Child Photography

Nicole Kriwtschenko Host a tasting party or become a consultant! 250.320.9430 austin@hotmail.com

Photos Moms and Dads love! Maternity. Newborn. Children. Erin Brulé 250.574.1258 erin@prairiechild.com prairiechild.com

Stampin’ Up! Dawnica-Lynn Flatt

The Art We Are Artisan Market

Independent Demonstrator 250.554.2381 http://dawnica.stampinup.net New Catalogue July 1st. Reserve your copy today!

Local art, comfy couches, unique, delicious and (mostly) healthy food! 201-322 Victoria St. 250.828.7998 theartweare@gmail.com

Parties and Events

Hope-full Universe

Sweet Spot Cupcakes Cupcakes for any occasion! Cakes and cookies now available. #8-1415 Hillside Dr. 250.574.6251 www.sweet-spot-cupcakes.com

Unique décor for the playroom and for life! Hope Mikal, Artist 250.571.6352 hopefull.universe@gmail.com Come find us on facebook!

Real Estate

Wild About Party Packs!

Ken Featherstone, Realtor

All you need to get your party started! Party packs for Birthday, Baby, and Bridal wildaboutpartypacks@hotmail.com www.wildaboutpartypacks.com

Bring Families Home Royal LePage Westwin Realty Personal Real Estate Corp. 250.374.1461 kenfeatherstone@royallepage.ca

Larry Brinkworth, Broker My objective advice is centered on your needs The Mortgage Centre. DICO Holdings Inc. 250.374.2222 ext. 201 brinkworth.l@mortgagecentre.com

Advertise Here! Kamloops Momma Magazine Connecting the local community of parents 778.472.0020 info@kamloopsmomma.com www.kamloopsmomma.com

"Sometimes we forget that children have just arrived on this earth. They are like little aliens, coming into being as bundles of energy and pure potential, here on some kind of exploratory mission and they are just trying to learn what it means to be human." -Martian Child 11

THE TALE OF THE BEHEADED PRINCESS DOLL By Byron Steele

ometimes we forget that our children don't know us as well as we know ourselves. They discover different facets of us just like they discover the world around them. This is a little story about just that: my baby girl discovering something new about her daddy. I had recently started sculpting again. Of course, all the kids were interested in what I was doing and they would come to my workspace and watch the process. My youngest daughter, who is about to turn four, was particularly intrigued. She was by my side one day as I began shaving a hairdressing doll, intending to insert wires into the head to create a hairlike effect. "Dad, what are you doing with that head?" my daughter asked. "Well, honey, I'm going to shave it." Naturally, she looked at me like I was crazy and decided not to watch; but when I fired up the Dremel tool to make the holes for the hair, she couldn‘t stay away. "What are you doing to her now, Daddy?" she asked. "Well, I'm going to take all these wires and poke them into her head so they look like hair," I replied. Again, she gave me a strange look, but then asked if she could help. She became my assistant wire holder and, for the next couple of days, I would find her sitting faithfully beside me while I was working, watching with interest, and not at all bothered by the fact that her daddy was inserting large wires into a bodiless, plastic head. Then one day I came upstairs from a work session to find her in the middle of a nuclear meltdown. She was standing in the living room with a tiny body in one hand and a little head in the other. Her much-loved mini Snow White doll had lost its head. My wife was trying to explain that the doll was broken and we would have to find her another one. It took a few minutes and a few attempted repairs, but my daughter eventually calmed down and accepted the fact that her little princess was beyond fixing. She reluctantly went over to the garbage can and deposited the headless corpse and the tiny head into the 12

trash. When my daughter retreated to her room with my wife for a much-needed nap, I was in the trash in a heartbeat, grabbing the tiny head. ―Man! That would be a perfect addition to my sculpture,‖ I thought, and in my jacket pocket went the bodiless head of Snow White. The head sat in my pocket awaiting its placement for the next couple of weeks. Then one afternoon I had a burst of inspiration. "The eye! I'm going to use this for the eye!" It was a perfect fit so, with torch in hand, I carefully placed Snow White's tiny head into the eye socket of the larger head. I was so lost in the process that I didn't hear my own little princess coming around the corner to take up her seat to watch me while I worked. All of a sudden an earth shattering scream erupted from beside me. I knew right away what was wrong and I tried to console her: "Honey, remember Snow White broke and you threw her in the garbage. She was gone so Daddy got her from there." She didn't care about my explanation. That little bodiless head was HER princess, HER Snow White, and even if she didn't have a body, my daughter wanted the head back. By this time, my wife was down the stairs wondering who was dying. When my daughter saw her, she blubbered out "My princess, Mommy!‖ (This is translated from "By brincesss mobby!" screamed at the top of her lungs). My wife tried to comfort her, telling her the same things I had. After some soothing words, cuddles and promises of a new Snow White doll, my daughter settled down and agreed that the tiny head could remain where it was for the sake of Daddy`s art. Byron Steele combines a plastic head, wire, and his daughter’s Snow White doll’s head to create a haunting visual spectacle. Photo: Sarah Steele.

It's been a while since the Snow White incident and the piece is completed. Yet, every time my daughter sees the finished product, she lets me know that Snow White‘s head is still hers. She`s accepted that Daddy is borrowing the tiny head for his art, and in doing so, has also accepted and embraced this new facet of myself that she has been introduced to. She`s even taken proud ownership in her part of the sculpture. "It's my creepy head, Dad. All of it. Snow White, too!" I smile at her and reply, "Yes, honey, the whole thing is yours, too." My daughter and I have come together all because of a beheaded princess. Byron Steele: Father. Husband. Writer. Sculptor. Lover of sarcasm and heavy metal.

Play, Learn, and Explore at the Kamloops Children’s Museum By Courtney Charlton

or more than 70 years, the Kamloops Museum and Archives has honoured the history of our community; but this summer, the museum will also honour the future of our community: our children. On July 10, 2010, Kamloops becomes the proud home of the first children‘s museum in our region. The Kamloops Children‘s Museum is an entire floor of fun, educational and historical activities that promises to entertain parents and children alike. ―It‘s really designed for all ages,‖ says Elisabeth Duckworth, museum supervisor, ―I think that‘s because there‘s lots of things that parents and children can do together.‖ The Children‘s Museum has something for everyone. There‘s a puppet theatre in a room designed as a paddle-wheeler with portholes and a swaying steering platform; a corner where your little one can dress up as a fur trader, pioneer, or farmer; a new and improved water table, games corner, and art centre; and an interactive colour wheel, animal skulls exhibit, and fur trader‘s cabin to explore. And if you or your child is in the mood to relax, there‘s an outer space-themed reading nook so you can sit back in a comfy chair, grab a great book, and enjoy. The museum has a wide selection of books for all ages and interests. Even the floor is fun and educational. It‘s a giant map of Kamloops that doubles as a game board complete with wooden vehicle game pieces. The grand opening celebration of the Kamloops Children‘s Museum is July 10, 2010. The new fur trade, Victoria era, and Kamloops exhibits will open as well. ―You‘re not even going to recognize it,‖ exclaims Duckworth about the changes to the museum. The Kamloops Children‘s Museum is a place where families can stop in and spend an hour or an entire day. It‘s wheelchair and stroller friendly and hosts birthday parties, daycares, and educational groups. Admission is by donation. The Kamloops Museum and Archives is located at 207 Seymour Street. For more information, call 250828-3576 or email museum@kamloops.ca.

A Natural Power to Parent

Test it. 1. If you have a very young child to play with, see if they will grab your finger without getting that magical smile from them. 2. Now use your amazing coo and goo talents and, after you get a smile, perform the finger test again and see if they will now grab your finger.

At every age the test may look a little different, but the premise is the same. If you can get eye contact, a smile and a nod, you have made a connection with your toddler, teen or partner. Once you‘ve made the connection, notice if a request of them is more successful than if you ask something without this ritual. One of Dr. Neufeld‘s main counsels for parents is that when you ―Collect before you Direct,‖ you are building your By Marilyn Puff natural power to parent. From this interaction, the child feels valued and respected – the two qualities that we want our s getting ready for school or bed a recipe for raised voices children to have so they can be respectful to others. and hurt or angry feelings? Is it easier sometimes than Think about it. If you are asking your partner or friend to others to get your children‘s attention and cooperation? Do help you out with something, do you demand they look at you sometimes feel like you just don‘t know what to do? you to hear what you are saying?; Do you give them These days we have fewer children to rear ultimatums or threats of consequences?; or do and more experts in the field of child behavior you rely on your connection with them to help than ever before. Currently acceptable “The frustration we ensure they have an interest in your request. parenting strategies point to time outs and For some reason with children, after the consequences to help us teach our children often feel and the baby stage we often let go of courting them, good behavior and respect. getting that friendly eye connection and behaviors we see in Time outs seem to work if they are done in working for a smile and a nod. Especially with a way that helps a child calm down without our children indicate our preteens and teenage children, we often feeling separated from you and losing the thing become obsessed with good behavior and they value most: your love. Yet, the frustration that something ―teaching or disciplining‖ our children when we often feel and the behaviors we see in our they make mistakes. we’re doing is children indicate that something we‘re doing is There is no doubt that our intentions are missing the mark. missing the mark.” good. We want our children to be happy and There are still many schools of thinking and successful in life and thus our reasons for those professional interventions that target the child constant mini-lectures and frustrated reactions. as having or being the problem. This can lead to diagnosing, Our children will love us no matter what and will benefit medicating, counseling, reward charts or consequencing until greatly when we repair our relationship after losing our you hear parents say, ―I just don‘t know what else to take temper or lecturing them into a corner. away‖. Dr. Neufeld is clear that collecting behavior does not So what‘s missing? mean giving up our place to be the authority with our What if it is NOT a behavioral problem? What if it IS a children. It is crucial that we are the magnets they are relationship problem? You might be thinking, ―I have a good relationship with my attracted to, their best bet in a world of superhero‘s, video child; they just do not listen when I ask them to do something.‖ games and peer cultures that also have a huge pull on their loyalties. By collecting before you direct, your child‘s Gordon Neufeld, a Vancouver-based developmental and response will be to give you their attention and cooperate clinical psychologist, has been studying child behavior for with your warm-hearted approach. over 30 years and has taken the theory of attachment much

beyond the early years. Dr. Neufeld has found that it is not how much we love our children that makes them want to be with us and comply; it is how we show our love and how much they love us that gives us a natural power to parent. When children feel connected, valued and understood, they have a desire to please. They see us as the center of their universe - a guiding position that is vital as they grow into their own personhood. Dr. Neufeld highlights how we naturally interact with young children. We smile and coo and goo at them until we get the big smile back. Yes, success!!! As early as you can get a smile, a child that feels safe and connected will wrap their tiny fingers around your finger. 14

Recommended Resources: Gordon Neufeld’s website: www.gordonneufeld.com Hold On to Your Kids by Gordon Neufeld and Gabor Mate It’s All About We by Diane Gossen Marilyn Puff (BSW) and her husband have a blended family of 5 children and 5 grandchildren. She has a passion for understanding human relationships and has been a family counselor for 20 years in Kamloops.

Skin Matters: What’s in your child’s skincare products? By Leilani Reid

s an expecting mother, I did what most probably do: let the hormones completely take over and focused my entire being on this new life that was soon going to be my responsibility. Now, as a mother of 2, it is still very easy to become overwhelmed with all of the choices that need to be made on behalf of the little lives that depend on you. One of the things I discovered when I first started buying (and questioning) baby products was that there were a ton of ingredients in most lotions, soaps, and other skincare products that I couldn‘t pronounce. I began to research the ingredients in these ‗trusted‘ brand name products that have been around for years. If our parents used them and we turned out okay, then they must be safe, right? What I discovered is that, from the many weird sounding ingredients listed, parabens are the most commonly used ingredients that are potentially harmful. So, what are parabens? Parabens are chemicals used as preservatives that are widely found in cosmetics and bath and body care products. Some researchers and organizations take the view that there are possible links between parabens (common ones include methylparaben, ethylparaben, propylparaben and butylparaben) and cancers. Some also believe that parabens contribute to skin irritations and can make eczema or dermatitis worse. The debate about parabens is still inconclusive, but is it worth taking the chance? A great website for more information on the toxicity of everyday products is www.cosmeticsdatabase.com. The Cosmetics Database was created by the non profit Environmental Working Group (EWG) whose mission is to use the power of public information to protect public health and the environment. On the website, you can find lists of brand name products rated from 0-7, low hazard to high hazard. The website also explains what the ingredients are and the potential hazards. With a little research, you might be surprised what products are still sold on store shelves, especially from ‗trusted‘ brand names. Luckily, we have more options these days and many companies selling paraben and sulphate free body products. Health food stores like Nature's Fare have a great choice of safe alternatives for you and your children. Leilani Reid is the co-founder of Kidsmart, a direct sales company that focuses on award winning, eco friendly, safe and non-toxic children's products for ages 0-6. For more information, go to www.kidsmartshop.com or call 1-888-708-7630.

Secrets from a Little Green Bus: Planning a family daytrip to Sun Peaks Resort By Janet Whitehead

Bungee Trampoline at Sun Peaks Resort. Photo: Adam Stein

n adventure can be found in even the most unlikely places and, although I do not recommend you and your family climb into a random green bus on a back country road with three nice looking men, this is where I happened to find the answers I was looking for. Wait. I take that back. You may want to do exactly that, but under different circumstances. I was on a mission to discover what Sun Peaks has to offer families this summer. Perhaps you've driven up to Sun Peaks in the shoulder season only to find a village that seems almost abandoned. You've had lunch in a restaurant that happened to be open and then have driven home somewhat disappointed. Well, in that green bus I learned that Sun Peaks is no longer a sleepy little village in summer. And I discovered the secret to an adventurous day trip to Sun Peaks: plan ahead! In fact, planning ahead could result in your being in the same funky green bus, but this time, instead of finding three men warning you not to travel further on McGillivray Lake Road because of snow, you'll find Northwest Voyageurs in period dress prepared to take you and your family back to the time of fur trading and voyageur canoeing. The day could even include a feast of wild greens, bannock, salmon and dessert smothered in maple syrup and Canadian Whiskey. (I wonder, do they skip the whiskey for the kids?)

Kevin Tessier, Chief Factor of the Northwest Voyageur Company, says all ages are welcome on the daily canoe trip – they've even had infants onboard. He suggests that small children bring their own life jackets and shares one other tip for locals: plan your adventure towards the end of July and into August to avoid the heavy bug season of early July. The men in the bus also assured me that for families looking for a 'no cost' event, McGillivray Lake is a nice place to hang out and have a picnic. It‘s just 6 km past Sun Peaks Village and canoe rentals are available. For those with an adventurous spirit, summer at Sun Peaks has a lot to offer. ―We find a lot of families where not everyone wants to do the same thing. So, finding a place with diverse activities is unique," says Melanie Simmons, Media Relations Specialist, Tourism Sun Peaks. "A father and son may want to go golfing while mother and daughter go to the spa." Hiking and mountain biking are popular family activities. The season really begins June 26 when the chairlift opens daily until early September. For mountain bikers, chairlift fees vary based on age, length of day, and seasons pass options. The chairlift fees for hikers range from $18 per adult to free for under 5's. In the summer, ―families enjoy riding the chairlift through the tough part [of the hike] to access alpine views." In addition to an amazing view, there is a diverse range of trails for all levels of hikers and bikers, from 4 hour strenuous hikes to short easy trails suitable for families with toddlers. ―Family members can ride different [mountain bike] trails depending on skill level and meet at the bottom where all trails funnel back to the center," adds Simmons. If you‘re looking for something less conventional, the bungee trampoline is a great option. Open 10 am to 5 pm through the summer months, this activity is touted as an adventure sure "to thrill and put a smile on your child's face." —I'm quite sure my children will be smiling, laughing out loud, or perhaps hiding out of embarrassment as they watch me flipping, flopping and pretending to be a gymnast when I give it a shot this summer. Fees range from $6 per ride to $75 for an exclusive hour. While visiting Sun Peaks Village, you may not find all of the stores open, but you will definitely find everything you need: ice cream, chocolate, good coffee, and a small grocery store stocked with all the things necessary to keep your child happy. And so, the key to enjoying a day at Sun Peaks is to come prepared. Pre-book activities that require booking or arrive equipped for a day of hiking the mountain or picnicking at McGillivray Lake. And do watch for that little green bus...it's full of very helpful men. For more information, go to sunpeaksresort.com and check out the Kamloops Momma Events Calendar for events and festivals happening this summer at Sun Peaks Resort.

Parent Q&A: Elizabeth deVries Elizabeth deVries is a very active mother of three young children: Hunter (5), Susannah (2.5), and Sawyer (8 months). DeVries is currently on maternity leave from her position as an elementary school teacher, but she definitely manages to keep herself busy. In addition to crafting, blogging, and organizing the annual Kamloops Kids’ Stuff Sale, deVries has taken on kamloopsparents.com, an online resource for all things family-friendly in and around Kamloops. Check it out! Q: What is the best advice you‘ve ever been given? A: Trust your instincts. Q: What‘s the most rewarding part of motherhood? A: All of it. Sitting here across from my daughter and watching her excited to have a doughnut. Taking my son to his preschool class, saying goodbye, and him pursing his lips for a kiss. Q: What‘s the most challenging part of motherhood? A: There are moments that are definitely not rewarding. Negotiating bad moods. On those days it feels like there is nothing you can do, but you try to look past those days. Q: Favourite Children‘s book? A: Roald Dahl‘s The BFG Q: What‘s playing in your car right now? A: Roald Dahl books on tape. ‗The Enormous Crocodile.‘

Q: The funniest thing one of your children has ever said? A: I made dinner and my son told me he wasn‘t going to eat it because it tasted like poop. We don‘t use that word in our house. Q: What was the last book you read? A: Book of Negros. I‘m in two book clubs and they doubled up. I was like ‗Yes! I can totally do this month.‘ Q: When was the last time you had a good night‘s sleep? A: Last night...no, my son was up with a cough... I think I probably forget what a good night‘s sleep feels like! Q: What do you do just for yourself? A: Do I do anything? I don‘t know if there‘s something I do just for me. The things that I do for myself make me a better mom.

Q: If you didn‘t have children, what would you be doing Q: Biggest mess your children have ever made? right now? A: When they took packages of instant oatmeal and dumped them A: I have no idea! on my bed. They get in the most trouble together.

We asked you:

What do you think about full-time kindergarten? ―I don't like the idea of full-time kindergarten. In our family, our son has never been to daycare or had the experience of being away from home all day yet. I like that with a half day system, children are eased into being at school gradually. At kindergarten age, children are just too young still to be dealing with such a long day at school.‖ - Haylley ―As a parent of a child entering a full day kindergarten program, I can only trust that the full day will assist my daughter socially and emotionally, provide her with increased school readiness, and lead to higher academic achievement. If the program provides a relaxed, unhurried school day with additional time for a range of experiences, for screening and assessment opportunities, and for quality relations between adults and students, then great!‖ - Shandee “I‘m nervous enough as it is to send my daughter to kindergarten. I can‘t imagine sending her for a whole day. It will probably be tougher for me than for her!‖ - Marie

Community Events Calendar June 19: Kamloops Energy Fair McArthur Island Sports Centre, 250.318.6483 June 19/26: Big Pine BMX Race Riders of all abilities, Kamloops Bike Ranch, Juniper kmusson@shaw.ca

June 25-Oct 31: North Shore Farmer’s Market Spirit Square, Fri. 4-8.

July 1: The 2141 Canada Day Train Kamloops Heritage Railway, #6 - 510 Lorne Street ,9:30pm, 250.374.2141

June 26: Top Ten Crazy Science at the BIG Little Science July 1-Aug 31: Music in the Centre,10:30-12, $4, $9/family Park Nightly entertainment at kamloopsparents.com Rotary Bandshell, Riverside Park, 7-8:30 (free) June 19-Oct 30: Downtown June 26-27: End of School Farmer’s Market Family Weekend Bash at July 2– Aug 28: North Shore Sat: St. Paul between 2nd+3rd BC Wildlife Park 9077 Dallas Music in the Park Live enterWed: Victoria St. between Dr. 250-573-3242 tainment at MacDonald Park, 4th+5th. Market starts at 8am. Fridays 7-8:30 (free) June 27: Kids of Steel TriathJune 20: Father’s Day at the lon Swim, cycle, run and have July 2– Aug 30: The Spirit of BC Wildlife Park Scavenger fun, 250.579.2312 Kamloops 2141 Train hunt, BBQ and more, 9077 koskamloops@telus.net Mon/Fri -7pm, Sat -11am 250.374.2141 Dallas Dr. 250.573.3242 June 30/ July 21: Cloth DiaJune 21: National Aborigipers 101 Lizzie Bits Baby Co. July 3-4: Canada Celebration at Sun Peaks (free) nal Day Celebration 517 250.374.8706 Tranquille Rd., 10-2:30 (free) July 1: Canada Day Celebra- July 3-Aug 28: Artisan’s June 24-Aug 26: Bizarre Ba- tions at Riverside Park Art in Square at St. Andrews on the Square Sat, 8:30-12 (free) zaar @ The Old Courthouse, the Park, entertainment, cul7 W Seymour St., Thurs 12-7 tural food, fireworks (free) July 5-23: KISSM (Kamloops

July 10: The Kamloops Children’s Museum Grand Opening Come celebrate! 207 Seymour St., 250.828.3576 July 10: Kamloops Highland Games Albert McGowan Park $10/adult $5/ child or senior, kamloopshighlandgames.com July 12-16: Rebel Writing Camp Ages 12-16. tru.ca/ arts July 16: Midwifery Info Nights 7pm, Mighty Oak Midwifery Clinic, 202-322 Victoria St., 250.377.8611 (free)

July 19-23: GROW (Generation Revolution Octane Week) Summer day

camp for ages 6-10. Prince Charles Park, 250-571-9621 Interior Summer School of Mu- (free)

sic) 250.574.5437 July 5-Aug 28: the BIG Little Science Centre Summer Schedule 711 Windsor Ave., Mon-Sat 10-4, www.blscs.org

July 21-Aug 14: X-Fest 2010 presents Twelfth Night 250-374-5483 for ticket info

July 24: Chrome on the Grass Show n’ Shine Prince Charles Park. ProJuly 6-22: Nobody’s Perfect ceeds go to Children‘s Ward Parenting Program Tues/ at RIH. Thurs 10-12 at Southwest Y/ CCRR. Incl. snacks, childmind- 250-573-4321 ing, and transportation. July 24-25: Seek the Peaks 250.372.7791 (free) Geocaching Weekend $52 for geocaching pack incl. July 8/9: Family Fun with 2 adults and 2 kids, reg. Literacy Night: Music and req‘d. 250.578.5542 Games in the Park July 8 - Riverside Park 6:00 July 30-Aug 1: Kamloopa July 9 - MacDonald Park 6:00 Pow Wow 250-372-8833 (free) July 31-Aug 1: BC Day July 8- Aug 27: Summer Story Celebrations at Sun Peaks time at the Library sunpeaksresort.com, 250-578 Kamloops Library: Thurs, 10:15 -5542 (free) -10:45, 250-372-5145, Aug 7: Hot Nite in the City North Kamloops Library: Fri, 10:15-10:45, 250-554-1124 Show n‘ shine all day, Victoria St. Downtown (free) (free) www.hotniteinthecity.com

Have an upcoming event? We’ll put it in our Events Calendar for Free! 778.472.0020 info@kamloopsmomma.com kamloopsmomma.com 18