Kamloops Momma Issue 3

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The Mommy Conditions

ome women get morning sickness. Some don‘t. Some get stretch marks. Some don‘t. Every pregnancy is different, but there are 3 conditions that seem to afflict most new moms. 1) Mommy Brain: a state of forgetfulness developed during pregnancy that, for some, can become a permanent condition. Symptoms of mommy brain can often cause frustration, such as searching for your car keys for an hour only to discover they were in your pocket all along; but mommy brain is also a valuable ‗tool‘ to help explain certain situations that might arise, such as missing an appointment or any mistakes made while editing a Letter from magazine at 9 months pregnant. 2) Mommy Vision: The belief that a Kamloops your child is the most beautiful, wonderful, angelic creature to ever Momma grace this earth. We‘ve all witnessed this condition in others: the mom who thinks her 20lb 2 month old is the picture of perfection or the mom who ceaselessly defends her child against claims that he hit another child. This condition does not apply to me, though. Everyone thinks that my daughter is the most beautiful, wonderful, angelic creature, right? 3) Mommy Amnesia: the ability to overlook the challenging aspects of pregnancy, childbirth, and parenthood and say, ―Oh, it really wasn‘t that bad.‖ This condition is often developed the second your child is placed in your arms and helps with the decision to have another child. ―I can do it all again,‖ you think, ―None of it was really that bad.‖ Well, as the birth of my second child rapidly approaches, I fear that my mommy amnesia is failing me and my memory has come back. I don‘t just see the moment my daughter was placed in my arms…I‘m starting to see it all – from first contraction to final push; from first sleepless night to 742nd sleepless night. My other mommy conditions are faltering too. Mommy brain has me up at 3am ‗Googling‘ how far apart my contractions should be and mommy vision – well, lets just say it does not seem to work on me. I know that my feet have transformed from size 6 to size 8, my ankles have become a distant memory, and my wedding ring has not graced my hand in 3 months. But I also know that it will all be worth it the second my child is placed in my arms...I have mommy amnesia to thank for that! * As I sit here editing our third issue, I am holding my 5 day old daughter in my arms. So if you happen to notice any mistakes, I plead „mommy conditions‟: they are working in full force! — Courtney Charlton, editor To share your ideas and comments, please contact us at info@kamloopsmomma.com or find us at facebook.com/kamloopsmommamagazine.

On the Cover: Four year old Allison and her two and a half year old brother, Nathan, spend a day outside playing in the autumn leaves. Photo by Christina Grono, owner of The Art We Are Artisan Market, It‘s a great place to relax, check out local art, and eat innovative, delicious food. The Art We Are is located at 201-322 Victoria Street, 250.828.7998.

info@kamloopsmomma.com www.kamloopsmomma.com Look for us on Facebook! 3


A Look Inside Kamloops Momma... Learning to be a Dad

Tyson, 4 Photo: Brianne Sheppard

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A dad’s perspective

New Paradigm Parenting

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What children do not need to be taught...and why

Not in Kansas? No Kidding!

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Following a first-time mom from final trimester to 1st birthday

Infant Massage

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A beautiful way to bond

Bridget, 5 months

Bring out the Bakers

Photo: Anna Terebka

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A sweet birthday idea

Peter Pan Syndrome

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Rediscovering the joy of being silly Brandon, 2 Photo: Jennifer Dupuis

Community Business Directory Reading and Imagination

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How reading sets your imagination free

Get Connected with local parent-child groups 15 Making the Connection

Evelyn, 10 months

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A directory of local businesses for you and your family

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One mom’s struggle with post partum depression

Calling All Heart Mamas

Photo: Kira Wood

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One mom’s story about raising a son with a heart condition

Teaching Financial Success

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What your children should know Lainey, 5 days old

Getting Fit - Family Style

Photo: Cody Charlton

Interactive Fitness

With a family-friendly boot camp

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Experiencing fun and fitness simultaneously

Community Events Calendar Kamloops Momma is the fun, reliable publication connecting local families to each other and to our community. We provide information about regional events, resources and businesses, as well as articles intended to inspire, enlighten, and empower parents and caregivers. As a local resource, we want our community to get involved. We encourage and accept submissions from any person, business, or organization sharing our goal to strengthen our parenting community. Kamloops Momma is published every two months and available for free at businesses and organizations throughout our region. Readers can also download the magazine online and subscribe to have it delivered right to their door.

Subscriptions are available for $20 a year.

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Kamloops Momma Magazine Published by Courtney Charlton, Editor Contact: 778-472-0020 info@kamloopsmomma.com www.kamloopsmomma.com facebook.com/kamloopsmommamagazine All rights reserved. No written or illustrated part of this magazine may be reproduced, except brief quotations in articles or reviews, without permission from the editor and individual authors.


Learning to be a Dad By Trevor Eggleton

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he cliché that nothing can prepare you for parenthood is true. Thinking you are prepared is like thinking you could make a good movie just because you've seen one. Teaching your kid to ride a bike, catch a ball, or take her first steps is preceded by a million tiny actions that tell her that she's loved and safe. However, as much as we use the word parent, there's a difference between being a mom and a dad. From what I can tell, being a dad is a learned skill. Historically, the role of the father was to go out and ―bring home the “Fatherhood is simply bacon.‖ Maker of fire, killer of beast, not built into men the earner of pay cheque; but in 2010, you kind of get the feeling that all way motherhood is that stuff can be taken care of by built into women. I matches, Safeway and your wife's salary (which may very well be can be convinced greater than yours). So what is a dad 2010? differently when I see inFor me, the hardest part of becoming a dad was the development of little boys start my paternal instincts. Women have pushing around dolls nine months to prepare for motherin strollers instead of hood as they feel their bodies being taken over by another force. Morntrying to decapitate ing sickness, afternoon sickness, evening sickness, night sickness, them.” late-mid morning sickness, the smell of eggs, the sight of eggs, the thought of eggs, and the sudden and desperate lure of pickles tell her early and from then on that someone else is in control. All this time that women are developing their instincts men really aren't. Sure, we're checking out strollers and cribs, but this stuff keeps the idea of having a baby kind of light and fun, like the showcase showdown on the Price is Right. But when the baby comes everything changes. I got a phone call from a friend shortly after my daughter was born inviting me to meet a few friends at the pub. "Sure," I replied, "see you in 15 minutes." My wife didn't have to say a word. The baby was crying and her face said, "Leave and die." So I made the wise choice and stayed. I also learned something very valuable: my instincts had to change. Fatherhood is simply not built into men the way motherhood is built into women. I can be convinced differently when I see little boys start pushing around dolls in strollers instead of trying to decapitate them. It's just the way

we're made and has been the basis of our culture and relationships since time immemorial -that is, until now. Women are proving their equality in the workforce and men are expected to do the same in the house. There are men out there who will trumpet that they change as many diapers as their wives and leap out of bed at the first sound of crying. I'm sure there are dads who get it and don't have to be told; but for many of us, changing a diaper or getting a bottle ready is usually preceded by a request to do so. For the first year of my daughter's life I was more of an equipment manager than a parent because I didn't know what my daughter needed the way my wife did. Part of this was due to my wife‘s maternal instincts and part to her immersion in parenthood. Being with our daughter 24/7 was like learning a language by immersion, whereas my coming home after work for a few hours of parenting before the baby went to sleep was like trying to learn French at the Y-by the time I got something we were onto new vocabulary. Sometimes, trying to figure out what to do felt like walking into a hole, climbing out, and walking straight into another, over and over again. Eventually, I spent most of my time looking down trying to figure out where the holes were instead of learning how to be a better dad. So I made one of the smartest decisions I have made as a parent: I took the last month of parental leave and stayed home with my daughter. I was able to learn what to do and when to do it from my daughter rather than my wife— and I'm sure there are few greater gifts a man can give his wife than to stop being the "other baby" in the house. It's important for a new dad's confidence and a mother's sanity for him to look after the baby for increasingly extended periods. This doesn't mean mom should be packing a suitcase, however. Wait until the mother is able to pump, then take over for a few hours at a time so you can do at least one circuit - feed, diaper change, put down for a nap. Then slowly increase the amount of time you look after the baby. Though you'll probably still be doing a lot of equipment managing, taking time to hone your paternal instincts will make a world of difference to you, your wife and your child.

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New Paradigm Parenting Paradox – The Natural Law of Childrearing What children do not need to be taught...and why By Jerry R. Levinson There is a fundamental misunderstanding about raising and educating children that is so profound and allpervasive that it must be changed if children are to become the glorious creatures that nature intended. To put it very simply, children do not need to be ―raised‖ or ―educated.‖ Just as a child does not have to be ―taught‖ to speak or to walk, he does not need to be ―taught‖ almost all the things we as parents and teachers usually spend our time trying to teach. What's more, not only are our attempts to teach children what we want them to learn unnecessary, they are usually paradoxical in their effects and lead eventually to the opposite of what was intended. The human organism has been evolving on this planet for about three billion years and our genetic structure provides each of us with a unique path to actualize our awesome inborn potential. The reason that almost no one actually ac“So what happens tualizes their full potential is because we, as children, are to little Sally? What not allowed to follow our indoes she really learn born path. We are forced to follow parents who believe that from being forced to they know how we should feel, share?” think and act. Many parents do not know the truth about either themselves or their children. They are not told that all of us are born wise, creative and intelligent; with an inherited ―knowledge‖ about how to develop, in much the same way that we all are programmed to physically develop in our own unique way and time. We all have goals for our children. We want them to be happy, loving, well educated, caring, giving, prosperous, etc., and because these goals are so important to us, we set out to bring them into being. The problem with this goal directedness is the law of paradox, which states that any attempt to directly actualize a goal with a child will lead ultimately to a result directly opposite from the one intended. The law of paradox applies to most parental interventions because the fundamental nature of children is rooted in the totality of existence, and almost all parents operate from their fear-based rational intellects. A limited rational mind cannot effectively raise a multi-dimensional, universal based consciousness. For example, let's look at the goal that children become sharing and giving adults. This is an admirable goal and one that would be manifested by all children as they reach adulthood if they were allowed to follow their natural, inborn blueprint. Most parents, however, do not trust in the

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basic goodness and innocence of their children. They believe that their children have to be taught to share. So when little Sally does not want to share her new doll with her sister, she is often forced to do so by her well meaning parents, thinking that she will learn to be a sharing or giving person by this outside influence. So what happens to little Sally? What does she really learn from being forced to share? She learns that she is not acceptable to her parents the way she is. She learns that wanting to possess something only for herself is wrong. She learns her parents don't understand or support her in having what she wants. She learns her parents are insensitive or uncaring about her feelings about being forced to do something she doesn't want to do. She learns that it is more important to consider someone else's feelings than her own. What she certainly does not learn is the feeling of true giving or wanting to share, because that can only come naturally, as the child matures and is respected first in her not wanting to share. So in this case the law of paradox states that only the child who is fully allowed to possess and be as ―selfish‖ as she wishes will eventually contact the inner richness of self from where true sharing comes, and that the child who is forced to share before she is ready will only learn the behaviour (act) of sharing, but will never contact the inner abundance that makes true sharing possible. To repeat, any attempt by parents to ―teach‖ personal qualities such as honesty, responsibility, being loving, gentleness, perseverance, independence or intelligence will backfire. The only things that can ever be taught directly to a child are behaviors; but the real underlying human qualities that support these admirable personal attributes can never be taught since they are already preprogrammed and will only emerge as a natural result of a loving environment. Let's take a look at the desire parents have that their children become independent adults. When five-year-old Jimmy is afraid to go in the other room to meet the guests who have just arrived, and wants to hold onto his mommy's dress and hide instead, his mommy feels embarrassed and thinks that he should learn to be a ―big boy.‖ She fears that if she ―indulges‖ his fear he will remain a wimp for the rest of his life. She must teach him to be independent. So she ―encourages‖ him to go and talk to the guests, with some combination of anger, threats, blame or perhaps some promise of praise or reward. In most cases she will succeed, and Jimmy will behave like a model independent child. This ―act‖ may reinforce mother's false belief that she has helped Jimmy take a step towards true independence. But as you might already see, she has not


done anything except use her superior emotional and physical power to force Jimmy to act against himself and perform the desired ―big boy‖ behavior. He has not learned anything about true independence, which comes slowly and naturally as a result of having one's dependency needs met first, but has merely learned to pretend and to please and to make someone else's reality more important than his own. The same principle, which in other words is to trust the inborn wisdom of our children and not to try to alter or control it, applies to our understanding of our children's educational needs as well. Children are born curious, intelligent and eager to learn. By age three, most children have, without effort, mastered our incredibly complex language system, one of the greatest learning challenges in life. The manner in which language is learned is the way nature intended all education to come about; namely that it occur naturally in the course of daily living, that it be part of the immediate needs of the child, that it be self motivated and unevaluated by others, and that it be interesting and involving. Play is the essential medium for childhood learning. The so-called education that occurs in school has absolutely nothing to do with the personal reality of children and has therefore nothing to do with true learning. When a child is forced, as he is in school, to put his own reality aside to attend to his teacher's agenda, he is damaged. He is forced to leave his rich inner world and pay attention to something that is often boring and irrelevant, out of fear of the consequences of displeasing his parents and teachers and being made fun of by the other students. Since our educational system does not understand how real learning occurs, the law of paradox runs rampant in our schools, teaching our children everything we don't want them to learn. Much too often what children really learn in school is: (a) that true learning is boring and tedious and irrelevant; (b) that success in life depends on forcing oneself to sit quietly and endure endless hours of boredom; (c) that nobody, including one's own parents, can be counted on to either understand or offer protection against this daily assault against the child's real needs, and (d) most sadly, that this is what life is all about – being forced to be away from the ones you love and having to endure the sterility and meaninglessness of this alternate reality. The good news is that there are now more and more parents who intuitively know what their children need and know how damaging ―normal‖ parenting and schooling has been. These parents have often suffered deeply in their own childhoods and have explored their pain enough to get clear of many of the illusions of our child-toxic world. It is this increasing number of enlightened parents who hold out the real hope for our troubled planet, because even a few children raised in a manner that allows for their full manifestation of inner magnificence, will be able by the force of their love, wisdom and personal power, to truly heal the world.

We asked you: What are your favourite Fall activities? My husband and I and our girls Gabrielle (5), Maddie (3) love to harvest the garden and then enjoy! The girls especially love eating carrots right from the dirt. Picking our apples from the tree and of course making delicious fall pies. Autumn art projects such as leaf rubbings, nature collages, Halloween crafts, and wax paper and crayon ghosts. We enjoy dissecting sunflowers, exploring the patterns in nature, counting and planting seeds and then cutting the last fall bouquet to enjoy a little longer indoors. The girl’s favourite activity is searching for and or designing the best Halloween costume. Of course, they love visiting the pumpkin patch to choose pumpkins. I especially enjoyed watching their smiles as they cuddled the angora bunnies at the Armstrong fall fair. ~ Jennifer Stars just seem brighter on crisp Autumn nights. We love to curl up in warm clothes and blankets and make wishes on stars! ~ Elly Actually I like getting back to a routine of school, dance classes, and lazy Sunday mornings! That and taking the kids out to jump in piles of leaves at my folk’s place. ~ Jo-Anne

Jerry Levinson is a Registered Psychologist and parent who lives near South Slocan, British Columbia. Join Levinson in Kamloops for a weekend workshop at Let‟s Move Studio. For more information, contact Brenda Falk at 250.851.2095 or beyondthebox@live.ca.

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~Following a first-time mom’s journey from the final trimester to baby's 1st birthday~

Not in Kansas? No Kidding! (This first time mom learns quickly that parenthood is full of the unexpected) By Erin Brûlé

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ast issue, I ended with this comment: 'I‟m fairly confident I am going to enjoy the whole process of labour and delivery! (yes...I did just use the word 'enjoy') You might think I'm nuts. Maybe I am. But I do know that life as I know it (including the imaginary one), is about to end.”

Yes, I was nuts and yes, life as I knew it is officially over. I couldn't be more thankful that it is. My daughter is almost 6 weeks old and I can't imagine life without her. But I also never could have imagined the ‗adventure‘ we would have when she made her grand entrance into this world. We live 9 blocks from the hospital. It took us just 6 minutes to get there. But it took us 8 very long days to get back home. I was amazed to wake up on my due date and immediately find myself in labour. I mean, how many people actually go into labour on their due date? And how many first-time moms immediately start with 50 second contractions, 3-5 minutes apart? My plan was to do most of my labouring from home and then head to the hospital. But by the time the midwife arrived, things appeared to be progressing fast so we were planning to deliver at home. However, later in the afternoon, the plan changed and we sped off to the hospital (I suppose at this point I should have given up on all notions of 'a plan'). When we got to the hospital it felt like I was living out a scene from a movie.

Car flies up to hospital entrance. Wheelchair suddenly appears. Loud groaning pregnant lady in a robe is wheeled furiously down the halls while making a spectacle of herself and scaring small children along the way. Pregnant lady gets into elevator where unsuspecting man stands uncomfortably in the corner, trying to ignore loud moans emitting from dramatic pregnant lady. Nurse tries to help pregnant lady onto hospital bed. Pregnant lady snaps. And so on… Yes…that was my grand entrance to the Royal Inland Hospital. All that was missing was the dramatic movie music. Left my iPod at the house. Damn. After a canister of laughing gas, an epidural and some acrobatic pushing, at 10:27PM our ―little‖ girl (9lb 4oz) arrived. But instead of Rya being placed on my chest amid tears of joy as I had ―planned,‖ she was whisked off to the ICU. And a few hours later, we learned she was being airlifted to Vancouver – she had experienced 3 seizures and her lungs were still full of Meconium (visit loopymama.ca for the full story of our hospital journey). After a very emotional week, we were given the green light to bring our baby home. She showed all signs of being a healthy little girl with a healthy little appetite. I know that my daughter spent her first week at the Children's Hospital in the NICU because that was precisely where she needed to be, getting precisely the care she needed to receive. I am so very grateful for this. But, my heart is still heavy from our ―lost firsts.‖ I was supposed to be the first one to hold her. I was supposed to be the first person who looked into her beautiful blue eyes. I was supposed to be the first voice she heard. I was supposed to be one who changed her first diaper. Who fed her first. Who bathed her first. I was the one who was supposed to put her in her first tiny outfit. I know that we will have many, many firsts together. And I know that the important thing isn‘t all the firsts we get to have, it‘s all the seconds, and thirds, and hundredths. And I also realize we had our own special firsts that I was able to savour slowly over the week.

Top: My heart melted the first time her finger curled around mine Right: Not the first mother/ daughter portrait I was expecting 8

The first time her finger curled around mine. The first time I saw her back, with her little ―Michelin‖ rolls. The first time I saw her eyes open. The first time I got to hold her without any wires connected to a machine. I'm still processing everything that happened – even now – 6 weeks later.


One minute I want to laugh. The next I want to cry. Sometimes I feel like doing both at the same time. I still find myself going down the path of ―what ifs.‖ I still wonder about what I could have or should have done differently. I still have moments when I think, ―My job was to bring her safely into this world and I failed.‖ I'm working on letting go of guilt. Of course, my ―veteran mom‖ friends assure me that there is never a shortage of things for a mom to feel guilty about. Apparently, I've signed up for a lifetime of guilt. Who knew? I suddenly feel very, very bad for all the times I've said, ―Well...let's just blame mom for that!‖ even when it was said in jest! Sorry mom. We are settling into being a family of three. So far, we've been very lucky to have an easy going baby who likes to sleep a lot (and eat a lot!). However, even with an easy-going baby, that fantasy world I described last time, where there are groceries in the house, meals planned for the week, and I shower every day, is exactly that – a fantasy! I've been learning quite a few lessons in my short time as a new mama, but perhaps the most important lesson to learn is simply letting go.

Infant Massage A beautiful way to bond By Jenn Johnson, RMT

The act of ritually massaging infants has been practiced by many cultures all over the world for centuries. It was Vimala Schneider McClure who pioneered infant massage in the West in the 1970‘s after travelling in India and seeing the positive effect that massage seemed to have on babies there. She was moved by the way poor mothers, who had very little in the way of material goods to give their children, gave an abundance of nurturing and love to their babies through massage. McClure developed a massage routine incorporating Swedish, Indian and Chinese techniques into a full body massage for parents to perform with their infants. She began teaching this routine in the US and eventually developed the International AssoLetting go of guilt. ciation of Infant Massage, which continues to put on infant masLetting go of the notion of being able to do it all. sage instructor courses all over the world to share this beautiful Letting go of...well...basically any preconceived notions art. you have about parenthood. The regular practice of infant massage has been proven to have many benefits for both the baby and the parent giving the Just let go, and enjoy the ride! At least that's what this massage. For babies, it has been linked to decreased irritability, loopy mama intends to do! relief from constipation, gas pain and colic, increased growth, a Erin is a new mom, discovering that a full day can easily strengthened immune system, increased circulation, and engo by without getting out of her of pajamas (sometimes hancement of neurological development. For parents, it has even 2 days!). She is even more impressed by all her clients been seen to decrease feelings of post-partum depression, inwho manage to arrive on time for their newborn photo ses- crease bonding and increase comfort and confidence in their sion with Prairie Child Photography. To catch updates as new role. she navigates the alien world of parenthood, check in at Making massage a part of your daily routine provides comfortloopymama.ca. able predictability for your baby, but it can also provide a time of quiet and relaxation for you. It‘s an opportunity for you to ground yourself and check in on how you are both feeling on any particular day. It gives you a chance to slow down and apHealthy. preciate your baby, to feel her soft skin or to count all his tiny Happy. little toes and fingers, cherishing these moments that you‘ll al-

Home.

Photo: Erin Brûlé

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Bring out the Bakers:

A Sweet Birthday Idea

By Candace Walker and Andrea Lougheed

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ell it‘s that time of year again…cooler weather, beautiful colours and the wonderful return to school! Time to settle back into something that resembles a routine after our lazy, holiday-filled summer. For those of us with children celebrating fall birthdays, now is the time to start thinking about how your child will celebrate their special day. Are you looking for a wonderfully unique idea for that child who always wants to help out in the kitchen, the one who has the makings of a super baker? Imagine hosting a party where the kids get a chance to be creative and decorate cupcakes, cookies or their own individual cakes. This fabulously sweet idea can be the theme for a party lasting from only a few hours to a delightful activity at an overnight sleepover. Ages can range from 3-4 up to 11 or 12 depending on what their making and if you don‘t mind your kitchen resembling a tornado‘s aftermath. Invitations can be as simple as a cupcake cutout with your details, to cookie cutters tied with ribbon and attached to a recipe card with the invitation on one side and your child‘s favorite recipe on the other. As each child arrives they can be given chef hats and aprons. Cookie dough could already be rolled out with different shape cookie cutters, icing and the toppings to finish them off or let them start from scratch with their own individual bowls and spoons. While the goods are baking, entertain your guests with a few games…pin the cherry on the cupcake or simple egg and spoon relays can burn off the sugar high from all the taste testing. End the party with the treats they made as dessert or send home their creations as part of their loot bags. This party theme will not only create a memorable birthday experience for your child, it may also be the inspiration for the very next ―cake boss‖. Enjoy and have fun! Candace Walker and Andrea Lougheed are two local moms who own Wild About Party Packs, an online party store with all your party needs.

Super Yummy Sugar Cookies Cookies 1 ½ cups all purpose flour ½ tsp. baking powder ¼ tsp salt ½ cup margarine-room temp. ½ cup sugar 1 egg yolk 3 tbsp. milk ½ tsp. vanilla

Icing 1 cup icing sugar 1/4 tsp salt 1/2 tsp peppermint extract 1 tbsp. milk

Directions: Preheat oven to 375°C. Cream together margarine and sugar. Add egg yolk and mix in well. Sift together dry ingredients. Add dry ingredients to wet mixture alternating with milk (1/3 at a time). Add vanilla until just mixed in. Chill dough for 30 min. Roll out and cut with fun cookie cutter shapes. Bake for 5-8 min. Take out before edges turn brown for a softer cookie. Icing Directions: Mix together first 3 ingredients add milk slowly until desired consistency is reached. Cool and decorate with icing and fun sprinkles and candy pieces.

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Peter Pan Syndrome Rediscovering the joy of being silly By Janet Whitehead

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y 3 year old granddaughter is one of my greatest teachers. On the day that her little sister arrived, she taught me the value of being silly. She held her new sister and lovingly said, "Oh! You are silly." Later that same day, she made-up a ‗new sister‘ dance and announced, "I'm being silly for you." Those early words to the new baby and that much thought out and sincere dance were not 'silly' in the way that we as adults have come to think of silly. They were acts of happiness, joy, and blessings. My granddaughter has not yet learned that silly is daft and trivial. For her, silly still means joy and happiness. And she's right. If you think about it, what brings on the first smiles, the first laugh, the first playfulness in our children?  Our scrunched up faces, tongue stuck out, saying "pffffftttt."  Daddy dancing with arms and legs flailing in the air.  Mommy reading nonsensical silly stories and singing silly songs.

 Imagine your manager wearing a tutu during the meeting.  The best way to practise the art of being silly: Follow the lead of your child or grandchild! They are the masters.

Family Silliness: My daughters' favourite mealtime memories include the nights we had spaggetti fights. (Hint: serve noodles without sauce. This makes finding noodles hanging on plants months later funny rather than mouldy). Coloured mashed potato fights were also a big hit. This was done in honour of the fabulous movie Hook, which, by the way, is well worth watching if you want to remember the value of silly. (Okay, that "Silly" comes from the old English word "seilig" and its lit- potato event took place outside. Destroying our home would have made 'silly' and 'stupid' synonymous.) eral definition is to be blessed, happy, You don't need to go to those extremes. If healthy and prosperous. It's a curious thing you have little ones, you are likely spend“Perhaps it is Peter that the meaning of 'silly' evolved from ing plenty of time being silly. You can shift 'blessed and happy' to 'lacking in good sense; Pan syndrome: Grownups this to a whole new level of joy and inspiraabsurd, frivolous, trivial, daft and stupid.' Pernot by changing the actions, but by haps it is Peter Pan syndrome: Grownups simply forgot how to have tion, being present in the moment and cheering simply forgot how to have fun and could yourself in the same way you would if you fun and could only only understand silly as 'lacking in good went for a long run, or attended a yoga sense.' understand silly as class. It is fortunate that we give ourselves per-

'lacking in good sense.’” More benefits to giving silliness the mission to be silly with a little one… but how do we keep that uplifting energy in our lives credit it is due: on a more regular basis? The act of being The next time you have a new idea you want silly can lighten your spirit, rekindle the passion you had as a to implement, a change you want to make or a job you want child, and be as effective as meditation for calming your soul. to quit, and those around you say, "You're being silly" now, If you add a touch of the inner brat and say, "So what, I'll do it you can thank them for their blessing. anyway!" being silly can be very empowering. Considering You are honouring your child and their natural way to conthat "genius is nothing more or less than childhood recovered nect to the feeling of joy and happiness. by will, a childhood now equipped for self expression with an There is one very real barrier that stops parents from enadult's capacities" (Charles Pierre Boudelaire) then being couraging and being a part of silliness. Once silly it's hard to silly ought to have its place high on the "I get to do" list. become unsilly. For a child, if you suddenly take them out of their silly play with no warning.. well, it's a bit like someone Practising the art of being silly: turning off Grey's Anatomy in the last 15 minutes of the show  Talk out loud in gibberish using vocal inflections as if you and telling you to do the dishes instead. Or it's like someone were saying real words. (Google ‗laughter yoga‘ if you'd pulling you out of the soccer game just as you are about to like to see this in action!) score a goal. A tip for the transition: Using "we get to" (play  Laugh out loud for no reason at all. Try this in your car or at for another five minutes) and then "we get to" (get ready for a your desk (and certainly at home with your family) great day at school) works much better than "you have  Make a list of 20 things that made you silly when you were to" (stop playing or get ready for school). little. Even pondering the idea is enough to trigger memoThere. Now you have the silly tools. Go. Be silly. Pffffftttttt. ries. See if you can incorporate any of these actions into Janet L. Whitehead is Certified Life and Creativity Coach. your day. musingsandmud.com 11


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Mommy & Me Boutique

Ideal

Ideal Weight Kamloops Achieve The Ideal You! Call us today for a free consultation! idealweightkamloops@gmail.com 250.819.8894 idealweightkamloops.com

Musings and Mud Coaching Studio

Nursing bras, Harley Davidson, Robeez & more! Over 10 000 quality consignment items! 3-700 Tranquille 250.376.1914 & Facebook

Life Coaching with a creative twist! Janet L. Whitehead, certified professional coach janet@musingsandmud.com 250.376.8402 www.musingsandmud.com

Lizzie Bits Baby Co.

Twin Valley Wellness Clinic

Largest selection of NEW and USED items

Go Green! Use Cloth! Cloth diaper specialists. Unique children‘s items. High quality children‘s consignment. 205-450 Lansdowne 250.374.8706 lizziebaby.ca

Mulberry Bush Kids Stuff Inc. Gently Loved Consignment & New Items Infant to Adult Clothing, Baby Furniture, the largest inventory of Robeez, Melissa & Doug www3.telus.net/mulberrybush 250.374.2501

Snug-Glee Bumz Diaper Service Happy Baby, Happy Planet Service includes diapers, pick-up, delivery, and laundering all for $22.96/week!

250.554.9722 www.snuggleebumz.com

Tumbleweed Toys Sahali Mall Specializing in the highest quality dolls, costumes, music, art, crafts, gifts, books, educational games, puppets, science kits 250.372.3500 www.TumbleweedToys.ca

Children’s Programs

Registered Massage Therapy Sports massage and rehabilitation Pre-natal and post-natal massage. Body cushion pregnancy system avail. 250.374.6396

Indoor Fitness and Recreation Fit By Design Precision Fitness Training...for Body and Mind Family Friendly Boot Camp Sabrina, sinclairs1@shaw.ca 250.851.2095 Look for us on Facebook!

Game-On Interactive Fitness Putting the Fun into Fitness. All Ages, All Abilities, All FUN! 444 St Paul St 250.374.4263 www.gameoninteractivefitness.com

Let’s Move Studio Yoga - Dance - Wellness Classes, workshops, and events letsmove@gmail.com 250.372.9642 www.letsmovestudio.com

Unitarian Fellowship

Western Karate Academy

Our children‘s program helps develop awareness of inner strength and resources, and enlivens the presence of spirit in their lives.

Building Character is Our Business The first month is free! North and South Shore Locations westernkarateacademy.com 250.376.5428

250.374.5594 www.uukam.bc.ca

Counselling and Tutoring Sharen Michael, B.A. Elementary School Tutor Davis Learning Strategies Family Counsellor 250.372.5636

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Health and Wellness

Home-Based Sales Businesses Discovery Toys, Alison Gregory Discovery Toys Educational Consultant 250.851.2270 aligregory@telus.net discoverytoyslink.com/aligregory Teach. Play. Inspire.


Ladybugz Slings n’ Things

Photography and Art

Baby products you‟ll get attached to! NEW soft and sustainable bamboo ring slings. Custom orders welcome! Shannon, 250.319.4437 LadybugzSlings.com

The Art We Are Artisan Market Local art, comfy couches, unique, delicious and (mostly) healthy food! 201-322 Victoria St. 250.828.7998 theartweare@gmail.com

My Strider Bike Co. Strider Running Bikes, teaching your toddler to ride on 2 wheels! www.mystrider.ca mystrider@shaw.ca 250.318.0365 Look for us on Facebook!

Prairie Child Photography Photos Moms and Dads love! Maternity. Newborn. Children. Erin Brûlé 250.574.1258 erin@prairiechild.com prairiechild.com

Moms Helping Moms – work from home Perfect opportunity for moms www.lookaround.ca 250.318.2495

(Logo)

Troi Crombie Capturing “The Real Thing” Engagement|Maternity|Newborn|Family 250.819.4746 troi@troicrombie.com troicrombie.com

Stampin’ Up! Dawnica-Lynn Flatt Independent Demonstrator 250.554.2381 http://dawnica.stampinup.net Book your workshop Now to get great new products and free hostess gifts!

Twist of Fate Yarns A Momma Friendly shop for your knitting & spinning needs. Classes, drop-in knitting, & events! 778.471.5562 twistoffateyarns.com 2020– F Falcon Rd *Behind Lizzie Bits Baby Co.

Parties and Events Estry Hiltz Magician Have an event they will never forget! Customized entertainment for all ages Birthdays, Corporate Events, Reunions 250.682.4838 estrysmagic@cablelan.net

Real Estate and Investments Larry Brinkworth, Broker My objective advice is centered on your needs The Mortgage Centre. DICO Holdings Inc. 250.374.2222 ext. 201 brinkworth.l@mortgagecentre.com

Wild About Party Packs! All you need to get your party started! Party packs for Birthday, Baby, and Bridal wildaboutpartypacks@hotmail.com www.wildaboutpartypacks.com

Ken Featherstone, Realtor Bringing Families Home Royal LePage Westwin Realty Personal Real Estate Corp. 250.374.1461 kenfeatherstone@royallepage.ca

Prenatal and Postpartum Care Mighty Oak Midwifery Personal, professional, woman-centered maternity care. Now accepting new patients! 250.377.8611 www.mightyoakmidwifery.ca

Kamloops Momma

Advertise Here! 778.472.0020 info@kamloopsmomma.com

Parenthood in the Making Childbirth Services Susanne Pytela, B.S.W. DONA trained birth and postpartum doula 250.572.6383 susanne.pytela@gmail.com

New Beginnings Fun and Informative prenatal classes for new parents. Taught in small groups by a midwife with over 18 years experience. Ruth, 250.318.6902 ruthymeg@hotmail.com

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Reading: It sets your imagination free By Nina Kimmons

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hy is reading important? When do you begin reading with your child? How do you help your child enjoy books? Reading helps teach children important life skills: how to problem-solve, socialize, develop confidence, learn new skills. The benefits of reading are endless. Children are fascinated with books because they allow them to delve into their innate creative ability. Books bring children into a world that develops their mind and lets their imagination run free! Reading is a part of our everyday life. From being able to spell your name to reading a menu at the restaurant, words are all around us. Being a confident reader allows you to go through everyday life with greater ease and a sense of pride. Helping your child become one who flourishes in literacy is simple: the way to get better at reading is simply to read more! It sounds simple, but reading to your child every day is such a positive and effective way of encouraging reading in your child‘s life. Your child is never too young to be read to. It can begin in the early stages of life by reading aloud during pregnancy and reading a little poem or short story to your infant. Remember, babies have a very short attention span and that‘s okay. As your child grows continue reading to him/her every day. Practice reading out loud enthusiastically and use different voices for the characters. The more fun you make it the more your child will have fun! Engage your child by asking questions or having them repeat words in the book. Whatever strategy you use have fun with it! Slowly the books you and your child choose will expand in length and soon enough it will be your child reading to you at night. Make reading a fun family routine. If you have more than one child, consider reading to all your children together. Have older siblings read to the younger and have younger siblings read to the older. The trend seems to be for mothers to do most of the reading at home but do invite dad, grandma, grandpa, aunt, uncle, babysitter, etc to be involved. By spending time reading together on a regular schedule (ex. before bedtime) children are able to ease back into the routine of school after holidays and breaks and make a stronger connection between home and school life. Create a library of books with your child/children and get excited about it. When your children see you enthused about books it will encourage them to get excited too! Allow your children to choose books that they find interesting. It doesn‘t matter if they‘re picture story books, poetry, comic books, fairy tales or novels. Reading is reading and if it‘s sparking interest in your child then encourage it!

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Declan, 3, shares his love of reading with his little sister, Evelyn, 5 months. Photo: Kira Wood

Recommended Books Ages 2-4 Clifford the Big Red Dog - Norman Bridwell Clifford the Big Red Dog Board Book celebrates Clifford's 35th anniversary. The giant dog - whose house is bigger than his owners', who bathes in the swimming pool, and occasionally catches the cars he chases --is now as remarkable for his longevity as he is for his size.

Ages 5-6 The Tale of Peter Rabbit - Beatrix Potter Mr. McGregor has two things on his mind when he sees Peter in his garden. One is the safety of his lettuces; the other is rabbit pie. Peter was warned not to go into Mr. McGregor's garden, but some little bunnies have to learn things the hard way.

Ages 7-8 Charlotte's Web - E. B. White Wilbur, the pig, is desolate when he discovers that he is destined to be the farmer's Christmas dinner until his spider friend, Charlotte decides to help him.

Ages 9-10 Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing - Judy Blume A nine-year-old is "given" a little brother and soon decides that she is expendable. But some things about little brother are lovable too.

Younger Teens Little House on the Prairie - Laura Ingalls Wilder The adventures continue for Laura Ingalls and her family as they leave their little house in the Big Woods of Wisconsin and set out for Kansas. They travel for many days in their covered wagon until they find the best spot to build their little house on the prairie. Sometimes pioneer life is hard, but Laura and her folks are always busy and happy in their new little house.


GET CONNECTED:

At 2 years old, Oscar and Cameron are the best of friends.

A guide to local parent-child groups Attachment Parenting

YMCA Child Interactive Centre

What: A playgroup for caregivers of children 0-5 with an interest in topics such as cloth diapering, baby-wearing, cosleeping, and extended breastfeeding (free + food for potluck) When: 2/month - days + locations vary Contact: 250-376-4723 or AP_kamloops-owner@yahoogroups.com

What: A drop-in playgroup for caregivers and children ages 0-6.Includes circle time, crafts, and a wide selection of toys and activities (Free w/ membership/ $3) When: Mon-Fri 9-12 Where: Southwest Y: Unit E, 1420 Hugh Allan drive Contact: 250-372-7791

Family Tree Drop-in

Healthy Beginnings

What: A drop-in playgroup for high priority families to expand their social network while increasing their awareness of the importance of early childhood development. Includes circle time, crafts, and healthy snacks (free) When: Mon and Wed 9-4 Where: 283 West Victoria St. Contact: 250.377.6890

What: A community-based drop-in group for parents/caregivers and their children ages 0-6 (free) Where: Interior Indian Friendship Society 2355 Parkcrest Ave When: Tues 9:45-11:45 Thurs 10:30-12:30 Contact: 250.554.3134

Kamloops Connexions

Parent-Child Mother Goose

What: A drop-in coffee group for moms looking for a little mommy time (childcare provided for a small fee) When: Fri 9:30-11:30 Where: Southwest Community Church 700 Hugh Allen Dr. Contact: 250.828.1114 connexions@hotmail.com

What: A group for parents, babies, and/ or young children that focuses on the pleasure and power of rhymes, songs, and stories (free, registration required) Where: Various locations When: Various times, programs starting this fall Contact: 250.554.3134

Photo: Kristin Bond

Kamloops Wiggles and Giggles Adoption Playgroup What: A drop-in group for parents who have adopted or are considering adoption. All ages (free) When/where: Monthly, times and locations vary Contact: Deanna Jones, jones_A@telus.net *October 23, 10-12 Riverside Park (tables near the playground) Bring a pumpkin (real or fake) for carving/decorating and fall fun Snacks provided

Next Steps What: A drop-in group for parents of children up to 5 facilitated by a public health nurse (free) When: Fridays, 1-2:20 Where: Kamloops Public Health Unit, 519 Columbia St. Contact: 250-851-7300

StrongStart Programs What: Drop-in centres for families with children ages 0-5. It`s a place to play and learn with your child in a warm, supportive, caring environment (free) Bumblebees: Arthur Hatton Elem. 315 Chestnut Ave. 250.376.7217 Mon-Fri, 8:30-11:30 Dragon Flies: Marion Schilling Elem. 2200 Park Dr. 250.376.2027 Mon-Fri, 8:30-11:30 Eagles’ Nest: South Sahali Elem. 1585 Summit Drive 250.374.2451 Mon-Fri, 8:30-11:30

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Making the Connection: One mom`s struggle with Post Partum Depression By Marielena Streek

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ostpartum Depression: it sounds scary, doesn't it? Web- the skillet like always but when my husband suggested I turn ster's Dictionary defines it as ―a form of clinical depres- down the heat, I picked up the skillet and threw it at his head. While standing in the kitchen with chicken pieces hanging sion which can affect women, and less frequently men, off him and the skillet on floor, he looked at me and said ―I am after childbirth.‖ Many women who suffer from this don't know that they are, are too scared to admit it, or may even be so sorry. ― After I calmed down, we decided it was time to call the doctor: this was more than baby blues we were dealing ashamed. Well, I felt all of these things. with. When my daughter, Lena-Marie, was just 2 weeks old I The next day the doctor told us to come in right away, but first heard the term PPD. I remember researching the sympduring those previous 12 hours I decided I wasn't toms and going, ―there is no way in hell I have to get help - I could handle this on my own. this.‖ But I was just too ashamed to admit to my“Most of all, I going Now I realize this was a big mistake. Depression self that all the symptoms fit. was so confused is something you can't handle on your own. I felt no real connection to Lena-Marie. I didI suffered 5 more months of symptoms before I n't feel that instant bond that I had heard about about why the got the courage to get help. I realized I needed to from moms when I was pregnant. Most of all, I was so confused about why the image in my image in my head deal with these feelings because I was losing out on valuable bonding time with Lena-Marie. head of a perfect family hadn't transpired in real of a perfect family I started sessions with Perinatal Therapist Milife. I knew that I loved her every much, but at the same time, I didn't really want to be around hadn't transpired in chelle Nelson, which I continued for nearly 2 years. To be honest, if it wasn't for Michelle Nelher 24 hours a day. real life.” son and my husband, I am not sure if I would be Everyone kept telling me that it would get alive today. better when Lena-Marie was 6 weeks old. I kept After a few months of getting the help I needed, things looking at the calendar going, ―Alright, just a few more weeks started looking up. I was beginning to feel like myself again, and then the 6 week mark is here.‖ I don't know what I was bonding with Lena-Marie, enjoying getting to know her and thinking - as soon as the 6 weeks hit things would magically spending the days with her. be perfect? Now that Lena-Marie is 27 months old, I could never imagSix weeks came and went and things didn't get better. I felt ine my life without her. She is a complete blessing. Of course I more frustrated, angry, upset, disappointed, and at a comdidn't realize this until after I took steps toward help. plete loss than I had ever felt in my entire life. The key to coming to terms with PPD was that my expectaI can clearly remember the day I realized something was tions had to change. There is no such thing as perfect and loswrong with me. I was driving to the store and thought, ―It would be so nice if one of these oncoming cars would just hit ing control of everything once a baby is born is natural. I tried so hard to keep this feeling of control alive after she was born me.‖ Then I looked in the rear view mirror, saw the car seat that I fought so hard against her. and thought, "Ahhh, crap! She`s back there again and I can't I now have a 9 month old son, Ethan, and because I sought go run the car off the road." help, I was able to cope much better with PPD after his birth. Once I pulled into the parking lot, a feeling of fear came For any moms out there that are suffering from PPD, please over me again. Taking her into the store caused such anxiety. know you are not alone. Don't feel ashamed to ask for help I got out of my car, shut the door, locked the car and began to and, most importantly, don't be afraid to. walk away. Just remember when you‘re thinking you‘re completely I know the question you must be asking yourself: is the alone and hopeless, you aren't. There is always a light at the baby still in the car? The answer is yes, she was still in car. I end of the tunnel. You just have to take the first few steps toonly got 10 steps when my conscience kicked in: "What the wards it. hell are you doing? Go back and get her out of the car." So I walked back, unlocked the car, and took her in with me. Then These days I go by mommy, but you may remember me as I cried the whole way home thinking what a horrible mother I Marielena Streek from back before I had kids. I have a wonderful was. husband Jago and two beautiful kids, Lena-Marie and Ethan. Check That night after my awful trip to the store I was preparing out my blog, “Laughs, Cries and Truths from one parent to andinner. Chicken was on the menu. I began to fry the meat in other.” http://laughscriestruths.blogspot.com

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Calling All Heart Mamas By Courtney Charlton

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elanie Kopytko has a story to share. It begins nine years ago with the birth of her son, Mitchell. Shortly after his arrival, doctors discovered that Mitchell had a heart murmur and 18 months later, the vibrant little boy was diagnosed with Hypertrophic Cardiomyopathy. The news was overwhelming, to say the least. HCM is a progressive heart condition that can be managed but not cured and is often at the root of sudden death. For the Kopytko‘s, Mitchell‘s diagnosis meant life taking on a new normal. Melanie Kopytko and her husband, Chad, leaned on each other for support and focussed on creating a safe, protective environment for Mitchell. ―We were in our own space and it was dark and gloomy,‖ recalls Kopytko. ―I think for a long time I told myself, ‗this wasn‘t going to be your life,‘ but the truth is, it is your life and that‘s okay.‖ It`s been nearly 8 years since Mitchell`s diagnosis and Kopytko could probably write a novel on the challenges that her family have faced and the fears that they deal with everyday. Sadly, the Kopytko`s aren`t the only families with a similar tale. Each year approximately 500 families in British Columbia discover that their child has a heart defect. With the support of the Children‘s Heart Network, a nonprofit organization that educates, supports, and connects children, youth, and families living with congenital heart disease in BC, many of these families cope by connecting with families in similar situations. Until recently, however, the Kopytko`s hadn`t put themselves out there to meet other heart families. They had each other and thought that was enough. Then last June Kopytko was contacted by the Children‘s Heart Network and offered an all expense paid trip to the

Chad, Melanie, Mitchell, and Jorja Kopytko are a heart family with a whole lot of heart. CHN‘s annual weekend at Critter Cove Marina and Resort in Nootka Sound. They accepted the invitation, but were unsure of what to expect. The weekend did more than exceed the Kopytko‘s expectations; it changed their lives. It was joyful to watch Mitchell interact with other heart kids - to see him laugh, play, and thrive - and it was therapeutic to talk openly about their experiences with people who appreciated all they had been through. ―They‘re strangers but you‘re talking about the most intimate details in your child‘s life and it feels so good,‖ exclaims Kopytko, ―All those things you go through as a parent who is fearful for your child‘s life - you don‘t have to validate or to explain.‖ Now Kopytko wants to reach out to families in our area. She wants to share her story and encourage others to do the same. ―I think there are moms out there who are in their dark days.‖ With the support of the CHN, Melanie Kopytko is starting a Heart Mamas Coffee Group here in Kamloops. It‘s an opportunity for parents and caregivers of children with heart conditions to enjoy a (free!) coffee and share their stories. The Heart Mama Coffee Group is held at the Aberdeen Tim Hortons, 1250 Rogers Way. The next meetings are October 26 and November 23 at 7pm. To attend or for more information on the CHN, please contact Nancy Fraser, Programs Coordinator, at nfraser@childrensheartnetwork.org or call 1-604-309-8515.

Period of PURPLE Crying Campaign You can share your knitting or crocheting skills to help Prevent Shaken Baby Syndrome BC. Make a PURPLE newborn baby cap to give to babies born in BC the week of November 15th, a gift to coincide with Canada’s National Child Day. Please contact Erynn at Twist of Fate for more information. 17


Dear Aunty…

Answering questions about you and your child’s health DEAR AUNTY: Our teenaged babysitter was diagnosed with meningitis three days after looking after our three year old son for the evening. I remember seeing something in the news last year about schools being closed because of meningitis epidemics sickening or killing teenagers. Is my son at risk? – Nat Dear Nat: Meningitis can indeed be life-threatening, and it is especially dangerous for people with compromised immune systems and very young children. ―Meningitis‖ simply refers to an inflammation of the lining of the brain and the spinal cord. This inflammation is usually caused when an infection breaks through our body‘s natural defence system and invades the fluid surrounding the brain and spinal cord. The infection itself could be caused by bacteria, viruses, fungus, trauma, or even (more rarely) cancer or immune system diseases. However, when schools are closed or large groups are quarantined because of meningitis, most often the culprit is bacterial, and officials are right to be concerned: Bacterial meningitis tends to make people sicker, quicker, than viral meningitis, and it tends to be more contagious and cause much more death and disability than viral causes. Meningitis can be tricky to spot, especially in very young children who can‘t communicate what they‘re feeling. Only a physician can determine whether a child‘s symptoms (such as sudden high fever, drowsiness or confusion, severe unrelenting headache, stiff neck, intolerance to bright light and sounds, nausea and/or vomiting, twitching, convulsions, delirium) are a result of meningitis. The doctor may ask to remove a small amount of the child‘s spinal fluid for examination to confirm the type of meningitis, which involves inserting a needle into the child‘s lower back. As for your child in particular, how at risk your son is depends on a number of factors, including what germ caused your babysitter‘s infection (Virus? Bacteria?), and what kind of contact she and your son had while she was incubating the disease

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(meningitis most often spreads through direct contact, like a cold or flu.). If your babysitter has bacterial meningitis, it is possible that your son has been vaccinated against the particular bacteria that made your sitter sick (which would mean that your son is protected from catching that particular version of the disease). Vaccines against the three major causes of bacterial meningitis are now part of the routine childhood immunization program in Canada. As for ―incubation time‖ (the amount of time it would take for your son to show symptoms of being sick after being exposed to the meningitis germ), I checked with Dr. Ian Mitchell at Royal Inland‘s Emergency Department, who says that if your son hasn‘t shown any sign of being sick after about a week, he‘s likely out of the woods. However, because stopping the transmission of germs among children is difficult, ―prevention is important‖, says Dr. Mitchell. His advice? ―Look into whether or not your son has been vaccinated for the three major causes of bacterial meningitis, and if he hasn‘t been, talk to your doctor about getting vaccinated. A healthy immune system can protect us from many of the causes of meningitis – try to stay healthy. Finally, know your child, know the key symptoms of meningitis, and remember that meningitis can cause rapid and drastic worsening of symptoms. Seek medical attention as soon as symptoms appear.‖ "Aunty" Erin Mitchell is a proud nurse, momma, and owner/operator of Aunty's House Registered Family Daycare in Kamloops. She is currently working on a degree in child and adolescent psychology through TRU.

Do you have a question for “Aunty” Erin? Please contact her at cdnnurse1995@yahoo.ca.

Weird blank space due to just having a baby… - The editor


Teaching Financial Success By Larry Brinkworth

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ne comment I hear most frequently in my financial career as I have counseled young families is, "Why didn't they teach us this stuff in school?" Whether or not the educational system is responsible to teach financial skills to your children is a matter for debate among some, but that doesn't mean you can't teach your children basic financial skills. In my opinion, every child should be taught at least two basic principles in the home: 1. Teach a financial success formula. There is an old quote in the financial community. It goes, "When your OUTgo exceeds your INcome, your UPkeep becomes your DOWNfall". To put that in today's terminology, "Spend less than you earn or financial destruction may be the result". Seems simple, doesn't it? Many families today are buying furniture, electronics, clothing and yes, even groceries on their credit cards and happily paying interest at 19% to 29%. Your child can avoid future financial stress by learning to spend less than she earns. 2. Teach the difference between good debt and bad debt. First let me say that I believe the ideal is to have no debt at all, but perhaps that‘s not so practical in today's world. In my opinion good debt is borrowing (responsibly) to acquire something that appreciates in value. Bad debt is borrowing to acquire something that is consumed or depreciates in value over time. I am a grandfather who has raised 3 children whom I consider to be responsible and possessing good financial habits. One thing I have learned in teaching children...you can talk about sound principles to your kids, but unless you model those principles yourself, your words may be falling on deaf ears. Larry Brinkworth, AMP SFC, is an independent mortgage specialist at the Mortgage Centre. 250.374.2222 ext. 201 or brinkworth.l@mortgage centre.com

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Getting Fit Family Style

Scott, Ginger, Olivia and Zachary Teale enjoy some family time at a Fit By Design Boot Camp. Photo: Robyn Shiels, State of Grace Photography

By Courtney Charlton

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ne thing that seems to be synonymous with motherhood is guilt. From the moment that second pink line appears, moms are inundated with reasons to feel responsible for every little thing that could possibly go wrong the rest of their child‘s life. Pregnancy diet, labour pain medication, nursing, and vaccinations are just the beginning. The list goes on and grows continuously. So what do women do to lessen the guilt? Well, many women seem to use a similar method to lessen the guilt: they put their own needs last. This is exactly what Ginger Teale did. “The guilt of ―The guilt of leaving your kids and focusing on is hard,‖ says the mother of 2. leaving your yourself ―I work full-time so I feel like when I‘m at work kids and is my time away from them. It took me until now to not feel guilty.‖ focusing on A year ago, Teale discovered something that yourself is allowed her to focus on herself without the guilt of leaving her children: a fitness boot camp – a hard.” family friendly boot camp. Now, when most people think about a boot camp, they don‘t typically picture a place where children are welcome. ―When I say that I‘m going to boot camp people think that I‘m going to get yelled at.‖ But Sabrina Sinclair, owner of Fit By Design, is not going to yell at you... especially not in front of your kids! ―She‘s great – very motivating, but non-threatening‖ Teale attends the Monday night classes by herself and her husband, Scott, and children, Olivia and Zachary, all join in on Thursday nights. The experience is great for the whole family. ―I just feel better about myself when I am more active,‖

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says Teale, ―and I think it‘s good that kids see their parents be active.‖ Whether playing on the jungle gym with other kids or racing up the hill beside their mom, it‘s clear that Olivia and Zachary are making friends, getting active, and bonding with their parents. This is what Sinclair‘s boot camp is designed for. ―I‘m a mom and I know what it‘s like to put yourself behind everyone else,‖ says Sinclair, who has been a fitness instructor and trainer for 19 years. This November, Sinclair is putting the focus on moms with a Mommy‘s Wellness and Nutrition Challenge. The 4 week challenge consists of 8 one hour boot camp class and a half hour nutrition component. Like all Fit By Design classes, it will be a levelled system ensuring Moms experience a workout suited to their fitness level and children are welcome. The challenge winner will be selected based on participation, total inches lost, assignment completion, and a vote by all moms. They will receive a $50 gift certificate from Café Fresh, an at-home fitness kit from Red Tag Fitness, an additional month with Fit By Design, and a $50 gift certificate from Studio Massage and Spa. In addition to these great prizes, the winner will be featured in the next issue of Kamloops Momma! But everyone who participates is still a winner because they get fit, learn to develop a healthy lifestyle plan, and discover the joy of taking care of themselves without the guilt of leaving their family. Classes are held Wednesdays and Fridays from 1011:30 at the United Church, 421 St. Paul St. For more information, contact Sabrina Sinclair at sinclairs1@shaw.ca or 250.851.2095.


Interactive Fitness: It’s good for the soul

By Sheri Lincoln

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one is the era of letting our young children play at the park without supervision or even around our neighbourhoods. And now we are faced with an obesity epidemic. As an active mother of 3 children, I find myself doing battle with the ‗video game /computer mania‘. I coach their sports teams and try to make fitness a family affair. The importance of physical activity goes beyond fitness; the effect of having fun is good for the soul. From birth onwards, movement is essential to developing and maintaining health and emotional well being. But baby seats now move from car to pram, to highchair, limiting neurological and muscle devel“The heart opment and flexibility. And computer doesn't care if games and television provide a 'safe' and you're running easy entertainment option for older children affecting natural physical moveon that pad playing a video ment, which is required to fully develop both the body and the brain. This is comgame or you're pounded by parental fear of allowing outside running children to 'play out' unsupervised. Low levels of physical activity have bearound the come a major public health problem in block” most western societies, creating what has been described as a 'ticking time bomb' in terms of future health issues. We are now seeing a growing number of children suffering from conditions born out of inactivity, such as: type 2 diabetes, heart disease and hypertension, cancer, osteoarthritis, respiratory problems, depression and high cholesterol. What is Interactive Fitness & Exergaming? Interactive Fitness is physical activity that requires participants to run, jump, and pedal their way through various Exergaming stations that are entertaining, challenging and rewarding. Exergaming allows youth who may not otherwise participate in physical activity find a way to be active. Children who enjoy playing traditional video games also like interactive games, such as Dance Dance Revolution and game-bike programs. What's more, the kids lose weight while challenging themselves and having fun.

The heart doesn't care if you're running on that pad playing a video game or you're outside running around the block, all it knows is you're doing something and it's got to pump more blood and oxygen to those muscles. The heart isn't judgmental on what the medium is; it just knows you're working hard. What are the benefits? As an exergaming participant, you get fit, lose weight and sharpen your sports skills while you play. You will be so focused on the games that you won‘t even acknowledge that you are working out! Many of the games have special training programs built right in including cardio conditioning, agility, endurance, speed, jumping, reaction time and more. The experience is fun and fitness simultaneously. Game On! Interactive Fitness is a place for everyone to enjoy - bringing people and physical activity together all in the name of FUN! It is suited for all ages and abilities, from athlete to non athlete, as well as and individuals with special needs. Owner Sheri Lincoln has a background in fitness, special needs, and rehab and is committed to connecting people through game play, sports, and fun.

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Community Events Calendar Oct 1-31: Adams River Salmon Run Roderick HaigBrown Provincial Park info@salmonsociety.com

sage Classes Tues.1:30 – 2:30 Co. 250. 374.8706. (free) pm, Let's Move Studio, Jenn Oct 29: Friday Family Fun Johnson RMT 250.374.6178 with Literacy Night KamOct 19: The Kamloops Proloops Early Language and LitOct 15 (Cont): Family Drop- ject What did you do that day? eracy Initiative. Fun, Games. 67:30pm, Northhills Mall. In Storytime North Kamloops www.kamloopsproject.ca Library: Fri 10:15 -10:45, KamOct 29 – 31: Boo at the Zoo BC Oct 22/23/29/30: Ghost loops Library: Sun 1:00 -1:30 Train Event 2141 Steam Loco- Wildlife Park, 250.573.3242 Oct 15 (Cont): Chapters motive, Reservations Oct 30: Playing with Fire PotCraft and Storytime Satur250.374.2141 tery and Craft Show and Sale, days 11-12pm 250.377.8468 Oct 22: First Annual Choco- Kamloops Convention Centre (free) late Festival Pavilion Theatre Oct 30: BIG Little Science Oct 15/Nov 19: Midwifery 6:45 pm $15 includes tasting Centre's Open House 11-4 Info Nights 7pm, Mighty Oak entries, raffles, auction. Kam- pm, Entry by donation. Midwifery Clinic 202-322 Vic- loops Festival of Performing 250.554.2572 toria St. 250.377.8611 (free) Arts Fundraiser Nov 2: RIH Craft Fair 10-4pm, Oct 15 - 31: North Shore Oct 22-24 Kamloops Fall Interior Savings Centre Farmer’s Market Spirit Home Show Interior Savings Nov 4: Prenatal Wellness Square, Fri. 4-8. Centre Program City of Kamloops & Oct 16: Kids' Stuff Swap, Oct 23: Child Passenger Interior Health. 250.828.5000 9 – 1 Calvary Community Safety 11-3pm Free at clinic. Church 1205 Rogers Way $5 by appt or visit. Lizzie Bits Nov 6: Pregnancy Care Centre Dinner and Silent Auction kamloopsparents.com, Baby Co. 250.374.8706 5:30 pm, Full Gospel Church, Oct 16-Oct 30: Downtown Oct 23: Kamloops Wiggles $30, 250.376.4646 Farmer’s Market and Giggles Adoption PlayWed: Victoria St. between group. 10-2pm Riverside Park Nov 6: Lizzie Bits Grand Re4th+5th. Market starts at 8am near playground. Bring pump- Opening 10-5 Lansdowne Village 250.374.8706 Sat: St. Paul between 2nd+3rd kin for decorating. Meets monthly. Deanna; Nov 6: TVPG Pottery and Oct – Dec 16: Afterschool jones_A@telus.net Weaving Sale 10-4pm, DesClub Drop-In, 8-12 yrs. Thurs 3-4 North Kamloops Library Oct 26/Nov 23: Heart Mama sert Gardens. 250.554.1124 Coffee Group. Meet other Nov 8: Arthur Stevenson Oct 18 (Cont): Rhyme Time heart families. 7pm, Tim Hor- Craft Fair 250.579.1891 tons 1250 Rogers Way. nfrafor Babies and Toddlers Nov 11: Caillou Show 4:30pm North Kamloops Library: Mon ser@childrensheartnetwork.o and 7:30pm, $35.00, call ORA rg, 604.309.8515.(free) 10:15 - 10:45, Kamloops LiRestaurant 250-372-5312 or on brary: Mon 10:15 Wed 10:15 Oct 27/Nov 24: Cloth Diaper- line. Oct 19 – Nov 30: Infant Mas- ing 101 7-8pm Lizzie Bits Baby Nov 11: Adoptive Families

loops Early Language and Literacy Initiative .Fun, Games. 6-7:30pm, Northhills Mall Nov 19-20: Kamloops Writers Fair Old Courthouse, register kamloopsarts.ca Nov 19-20: Christmas at the Square Art Craft Show, St. Andrews on the Square, 250.377.4232 Nov 23: Delta Sun Peaks Craft Fair Sun Peaks, 250.578.6019 Nov 25-Dec 7: A Christmas Carol WCT Sagebrush, 250.374.8483 Nov 25: Lights in the Night Christmas Party 4-8pm, Downtown. Nov 26: B100 Basics for Babies, raising funds for Kamloops Food Bank, breakfast $15, Coast Canadian Inn. Nov 27: Santa Claus Parade 11 am, Victoria Street, 2nd to 6th Ave. Nov 27: Crazy Colours Book Signing with Brandy Redford 11-3pm, Chapters Books Nov 30: SPCA Craft Fair Ukrainian Hall, 10-4pm, 250376-8943 Dec 6: Shrine Fantasy Show Kamloops Convention Centre, $15, Family $40

1.800.268.7371

Association of BC (AFABC) Meets 2nd Thurs of month, 7– 9pm Salvation Army church 344 Poplar St. dmortensen@bcadoption.ca

Dec 10-Jan2: Wildlights BC

Nov 19: Friday Family Fun with Literacy Night. Kam-

Santa Ora Restaurant, proceeds to RIH, 250.372.5312

Wildlife Park

Dec 11: Muse A-Fair art,

nature crafts, storytelling, show & sale, St. Andrews on Nov 13 – Dec 24: Christmas at the Square 10-4 the Gallery Kamloops Art Gal- 250.376.8353 lery. Dec 12: Breakfast with

Have an upcoming event? We’ll put it in our Events Calendar for Free! 778.472.0020 info@kamloopsmomma.com kamloopsmomma.com 22


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