10 minute read
Children & Education
Parenting:
A Calmer Christmas
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The season of goodwill can sometimes feel more like the season of discontent. If you’re hoping to avoid the tantrums, sugar crashes and slamming doors this year (or some of them at least), keep reading…
Family time
It can be incredibly difficult to fit everything in around Christmas. Kids often seem to demand the most of you when you have the least to give. If you’re time-poor, think quality over quantity. Half an hour spent on a family activity now might well avoid a lengthy melt-down later on.
Arts and crafts with the kids can be fun, but you might want to leave the messier aspects until after the Christmas entertaining is over (unless you really enjoy cleaning out paint pots, scrubbing slime out of the carpet and hoovering up glitter before guests arrive!). Paper craft is a good alternative. Paper snowflakes are cheap, easy and not too time-consuming. Cut them out at the table so you can sweep most of the scraps straight into the recycling bin. Paper chains are even easier. Or, pick up a paper craft book. Christmas Paper Play by Lydia Crook (RRP £9.99) is packed with things to cut out and make, including decorations, mini crackers and games.
Jigsaw puzzles can be a good way to unwind and de-stress. If your children are older and you have the space, buy a Christmas-themed 1,000 piece puzzle and leave it out so family members can do a few pieces of it when they need some quiet time. www.bornfree.org.uk
You’ll also be sent Born Free’s biannual magazine. Other animals to adopt include elephants, polar bears and monkeys. See www.bornfree.org.uk/ adopt.
Or why not do a good deed as a family, for someone closer to home? You could make a meal together for an elderly neighbour, take a busy friend’s dog for a walk, donate food to a food bank or a gift to a homeless shelter.
Charity gifts
If Christmas is starting to feel a bit too commercial, how about choosing charitable gifts? Wild animal adoptions tend to prove popular with kids and adults alike. You can adopt King the lion from Born Free for just £3 a month. The adoption pack includes King’s story (he was rescued from a Parisian apartment), a glossy photo, cuddly toy, personalised certificate and window sticker.
Setting limits
It’s easy to let the usual rules slip at Christmas. While it’s good to have some flexibility, you might want to set some boundaries. Try to agree rules as a family for the Christmas holidays, whether it’s no screen-time after 5pm, no more than two sweet treats a day, or a set bedtime.
Agreeing a few chores for the kids to do can help to keep them occupied and you from getting too frazzled. Even young children can make a bed, feed the pets or swish a duster around.
Forget perfect
Above all, try to accept that perfection is impossible. There will be sulks, fallings-out, spills and arguments. When you look back at this Christmas, you won’t remember whether the sprouts were perfectly cooked or your child wrote their thank you cards, but you might remember the time you spent doing a jigsaw together or hunting the Gruffalo through the woods.
Belper School
As we look forward to seeing what 2023 has to offer, students at Belper School have been looking forward to a ‘Christmas without Covid’ (or, at least, Covid restrictions) for the first time in two years.
How would you describe Christmas? Has it been different over the past 2 years? Here’s what some of our year 7 students said they were most looking forward to this year:
Alongside this, year 11 students have been busy revising for their mock exams. Here’s a creative piece that Nicolas wrote about the transitional time of the seasons of autumn and winter:
Meandering streams of raw, bitter wind sharply swerved and dodged around rolling hills, relentlessly forewarned in a frenzy of a million whispers of a journey’s end. As it marched ominously onwards, it whipped up a graveyard of bronze leaves forged in the wrath of the radiating sun, which glowed with a new ferocity of crusted, deep amber jewels. Perpetual patterns coerced harmoniously; they danced and twirled in and out of the whispers of colossal trees in the crisp air.
Starting to lose their veil, the dainty, skeletal branches begin to peep their head through the cracks and crevices to the sight of aimlessly drifting clouds; to see the sinking sun over yonder supplying the last pulses of majestic hues, illuminating the now vibrant canvases of a watery sunset. With the dwindling sun rose a new, bitter dictator with a lacklustre majesty already putting its unforgiving grasp on a now desolate wasteland. As the last glint of sun alighted at death’s door, only the glitches of what used to be gave a remote yellow glow. The shallow valley had fallen under a paralysed spell with only the relentless winds that now whipped the bare bones of the barren, desolate wasteland.
An otherworldly atomic blaze blasted a great gasping cavern through the stagnated void of staring visages of a frozen past. Slumped dominantly in a veil of paralysis, where lustrous gleaming lagoons filled with small pockets of oasis, remained a lifeless, deathly stillness. Where majestic, untapped wildlife remained, bundles of burrows all marooned inland patiently, anticipating the right moment to stir once again. Time will tell if they will awaken from their deep slumber... the air bares only the coldness of quiet reflections in its daze. A scarce difference to a time before which spoke relentlessly, but now acted as if it had been betrayed by the unforgiving overload that grasped the barren wasteland and turned it into its dwelling.
By Nicolas, Year 11 pupil at Belper School
Derbyshire Adult Community Education Service
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School Information
Ambergate Primary School 01773 852204 Anthony Gell School 01629 825577 Belper Long Row Primary 01773 823319 Belper School 01773 825281 Breadsall CofE VE Primary School 01332 831328 Codnor Community Primary School 01773 742537 C of E Controlled Denby Free C of E Primary 01332 880416 Ecclesbourne School 01332 840645 Fritchley CE (Aided) Primary 01773 852216 Heage Primary School 01773 852188 Heanor Gate Science College 01773 716396 Herbert Strutt Primary 01773 822771 Holbrook C of E Primary 01332 880277 Horsley C of E Primary 01332 880782 Horsley Woodhouse Primary 01332 880403 John Flamsteed Community School 01332 880260 Kilburn Infant & Nursery School 01332 880449 Kilburn Junior 01332 880540 Langley Mill (CE) Controlled Infant School & Nursery 01773 713429 Little Eaton Primary 01332 831471 Mapperley CofE Primary School 0115 9325386 Meadows Primary 01332 840305 Milford Primary 01332 841316 Morley Primary 01332 831295 Pottery Primary 01773 823383 Richardson Endowed Primary School 01332 880317 Ripley Junior School 01773 742281 St Andrew’s C of E Primary School 0115 9324252 St Benedict 01332 557032 St Elizabeth’s Catholic Primary 01773 822278 St John’s CE Primary, Belper 01773 822995 Stanley Common Primary School 0115 9322437 Street Lane Primary 01773 742717 Swanwick Hall School 01773 602106 Turnditch CE VA Primary 01773 550304 William Gilbert Primary 01332 840395
School Terms 2022/23
All dates taken from www.derbyshire.gov.uk Term 2: Monday 31 October 2022 to Thursday 22 December 2022 Term 3: Monday 9 January 2023 to Friday 17 February 2023 Term 4: Monday 27 February 2023 to Friday 31 March 2023 Term 5: Monday 17 April 2023 to Friday 26 May 2023 Term 6: Monday 5 June 2023 to Friday 21 July 2023 Term 1: Monday 4 September 2023 to Friday 27 October 2023
The Diary of a Local Mum
What’s Your Style?
I’ve heard a few parenting buzzwords floating about over the years, referring to ‘styles’ of parenting, such as ‘helicopter’, ‘lawnmower’ and ‘tiger’. I had no real idea what these meant and (probably a little late in the day given that my two are now both teens) I realised that I’ve never really given much thought to having a particular style of parenting before… I’ve just sort of got on with things.
I do remember reading an advice book when my eldest was a baby but it got me so confused and stressed that I hid the book on top of the bookcase where I couldn’t reach it! To date, that’s pretty much the sum total of my research into parenting. I generally take a ‘fly by the seat of your pants’ approach, or ‘close your eyes and hope for the best’ but, better late than never (story of my life…) I thought maybe it was high time I did some research into these parenting styles, if only to see what I could claim, in retrospect, to have been doing all along.
Firstly, upon googling ‘parenting styles’ it appeared there were ‘new’ and ‘old’ parenting styles. Fair enough, I thought. I mean, things have changed A LOT since the days of ‘children should be seen and not heard’. We live in a very child-centric world nowadays and most parents will admit to putting their children’s wishes and needs before their own most of the time (and we’re certainly not allowed to send them up chimneys anymore). So, having concluded that, yes, things have changed, I began to read up on some of the ‘new’ styles:
Helicopter: where a parent ‘hovers’ over their kids, making sure everything’s ok and swooping down to sweep up any problems. Akin to some kind of coastguard, I concluded.
Tiger: A strict, tough-love approach which prioritises academic and athletic achievement. Tigers are of the opinion that, by setting the bar high, children will respond to challenges. Often combined with micromanagement to ensure these high expectations are met. Lawnmower: ‘Mows down’ a path for their kids by removing all obstacles in the way, avoiding challenge or discomfort. These parents often do things on their kids’ behalf.
Elephant: In contrast to tigers, elephant parents value emotional security and connection, taking a calm, laid-back approach valuing encouragement over achievement.
Dolphin: Apparently, dolphin parents seek collaboration, flexibility and balance in their parenting style. They prioritise POD – play, others and downtime. And swimming, too, I assume?
Free-range: These parents believe freedom promotes independence and self-assurance. They let their children explore their environment and do things alone often at a younger age than others might.
Well, it’s safe to say I couldn’t reach any kind of conclusion! It appears I may have a zoological approach to parenting … perhaps with some vehicles thrown in for good measure! I couldn’t fit neatly into any box and nor would I wish to. What really struck me in my research was the constant implied (or often overtly stated) criticism in the various descriptions I read of each ‘style’. Tiger = too pushy; Helicopter = stifling/controlling; Lawnmower = over protective; Free-range = neglectful … and so it goes on. There was not a single parenting ‘style’ that seemed to be viewed in a positive light by any of the authors of articles I read. It seems parents really can’t do right for doing wrong!
I happily concluded that I was absolutely right to leave that book gathering dust on top of the bookcase (I wonder if it’s still there?) as even the ‘experts’ can’t agree on how best to do it. So, I’ll continue to blunder through this parenting lark in a mix-and-match fashion, guided by my kids in a ‘blind leading the blind’ approach. Maybe we’ll even throw in a trip to the zoo for good measure. Who knows, we might learn something! Penguin parenting, anyone? Or the giant tortoise approach, perhaps?
By Helen Young
