Once in a
Your FREE magazine for students by students February 2013
INSIDE THIS ISSUE: Sex, Love & Relationships
“HOW WAS IT FOR YOU?”
Introducing the NSS survey MASCOTS
N O C : G N I N R A W
X E S TA I N
C T I PLIC
T N E ONT
PLUS: FASHION | SOCIETIES | POLITICS | SCIENCE
Your BlueMoon Written, designed and edited by UH students, provided by UHSU Editor Elisabeth Schuetz print.editor@uhsu.co.uk Deputy Editor Kate Snowdon print.deputy.editor@uhsu.co.uk Design Sub Editor Kealie Mardell Head Designers Jenny Chu & Stephen Frost Photography Sub Editor Sarah-Louise Burns Designers: Zoe Fish Lin, Cara Zaleski, Jessica Crighton, Alice Kaying Law, Joel Ericsen. Contributors Kealie Mardell, Katherine Morgan, Olivia Draisey, Saidah Graham, Clare Abbott, Vidhyabama Appalasamy, Abiseshana Mohan, Rachel Smith, Jon Baker, Ra’eesa Dar, Peng Siang Loh, Ani O’Neill Contact Us uhsu.comms@herts.ac.uk UHSU Comms & Media University of Hertfordshire Students’ Union Hatfield Herts, AL10 9AB Published by Ben Chater Printing Ltd 45a Charleston Street London SE17 1NG
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Elisabeth Schuetz - Print Editor
Here we are with the third issue of this academic year, just a few days after Valentines’ Day. We all can still feel the love around us and hence this month’s issue is themed sex, love and relationships. Many different things are included within this theme, from the perfect date outfit to aphrodisiac food or sex robots. Hopefully everyone is able to find something interesting in this issue and please spread the word about BlueMoon. We are always looking for more readers and contributors. We were also able to get some student designers interested in helping out so this issue is mostly designed but them. It was exciting to see their ideas and see BlueMoon progress one step further. Let us know what you think about this issue through Twitter or Facebook. Big thank you once again to all the writers and photographers as well. It’s lovely to see how many ideas everyone has and takes time out of their busy schedules to write something. The next issue’s theme is “Talent” so show us your talent and tell us about things YOU want to see included in BlueMoon. Just facebook, tweet or email us at print.editor@uhsu.co.uk
Kate Snowdon - Deputy Print Editor
Hello again, I can’t believe how quickly this issue has come around! Our team here at BlueMoon is building up and we’ve now got a strong team of designers on board, as well as our brilliant writers and photographers, so life was made a little easier for me this month! It’s also been great to have so many of you coming up to me and commenting on the mag - so keep giving your feedback, it really is invaluable to us. I decided to be a bit daring with this issue by choosing the theme of ‘love, sex and relationships’ - but hopefully it’s a risk that’s paid off. I find that this time of year relationships are in the spotlight thanks to the commercialisation of Valentines Day, but we never really get into the nitty gritty stuff, the stuff we all care about, or the stuff that affects us most; so here it is, not just another Valentines day mag. Enjoy. Also, as a side note, next issue’s theme will be “Talent”, so if you know of someone who is doing something awesome (or even if it’s you - we don’t believe there is such a thing as big-headedness here at BlueMoon), like launching a business, developing a product, entering some kind of competition, etc. Be sure to get in touch (katesnowdon@hotmail. com or @k1snowdon) so we can shout about it and use BlueMoon as your platform.
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Sex, Love & Relationships In this issue...
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LGBT Video Review 4 RaG Jailbreak 4 Discussion Soociety 5 Get Active - Polercise 5 Crush Radio 6 Cover Story - NSS Mascots 7 Are Female Students Safe? 9 Marriage: Arranged, Forced or Love? 10 After Marriage Sex 11 Losing Their ‘V-Card’ After 20 11 The Science of Love 12 Roxxy the Sex Robot 13 Politics: Gay Marriage 14 10 Years Ago Today 15 Events Calender 16 Mosaic 18 Dating Fashion 19 Photography 20 Aunty Clare’s Cooking on Dates 22 Aphrodisiac Food 23 Beyond Fifty Shades 24 Creative Writing 25 Best On Screen Couples 26 Cringiest Movie Moments 27 TV Documentaries 28 Love Songs & Sex Jams 29 Problem Page 30 Wordsearch and Games 31 /uhsuBluemoon
Design b y Kealie M ardell
Relationships
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A REVIEW: LGBT FILM r t s
By David Dykes Design:Cara Zaleski
February is LGBT History Month in the UK and the University of Hertfordshire’s LGBT+ Society is hosting a range of events to celebrate. These include film screenings, club nights and other events all in the name of educating more people about the experiences and history of the LGBT+ commnity.
One such event was a screening of the documentary, “Call Me Kuchu,” about the experiences of the homosexual community in Uganda (Kuchu is a moniker adopted by Ugandan gay men and women). The Ugandan government’s treatment of homosexuals came under international scrutinity last year when prospective laws were introduced, aimed at further restricting the rights of homosexuals. This bill would have included clauses that would have made not reporting the knowledge of a homosexual person within 24 hours a crime punishable by up to three months of prison, but was rejected under pressure from the UN amongst others. Although the film is ultimately tragic, particularly when depicting the murder of gay rights activist David Kato, it is also a celebration of the strength of the Ugandan LGBT+ community in their struggle against immense social pressure from religious and journalistic institutions. The film—especially when watched in the light of the recent Equal Marriage bill passing in the UK—is a reminder that there are still many battles to be faced by LGBT+ people, but also of their incorrugible progress.
& E n t s
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RAISE & GIVE Words and Design by Kealie Mardell
With a love for travel, the goodwill to raise money, and a challenge that would test even the strongest team’s relationship, Raise and Give brought the Jailbreak event to UH. Jailbreak is a unique fundraising experience, where teams must get as far from the start point as possible without spending any money. At the end of January the RaG team brought this exciting challenge to UH for the first time. Jailbreak had proved a huge success at other Universities, with the current record holders from the Bristol making it all the way to Australia.
Our teams set off on Friday, and a huge thank you goes out to everyone who braved the treacherous snow to take part. Over the following 36 hours we followed their progress, and watched as our teams travelled to France, Germany, Amsterdam, and even Italy. Union TV interviewed one of the Jailbreak teams, who reached France. Their journey began with a sprint away from the University, as they headed towards their goal, Stansted Airport. Blagging free rides on buses and tubes they managed to reach the airport but were unable to get a flight. Their hitchhiking adventures, including a lift from a UH graduate, helped to get them all the way to France. On their journey home they were inadvertently part of a gay rights protest, finishing off a weekend they won’t ever forget!
DON’T MISS!
Feb 20th
Another film, to be shown on February 20th in the Lindop building is “Milk,” the biopic of US politican and gay rights activist Harvey Milk, starring Sean Penn. It is again a reminder of the progress that LGBT+ rights have made in the very recent past. Refreshments will be provided at the screening, including pizza after the film has been shown.
Feb 21st Other events this month includes a Juice club night in the Forum on the 21st, raising money for Herts Pride, and a community art event held on the de Havilland campus. Further details about these events can be found on the LGBT+ society’s website at www.uhsulgbt.co.uk
Our teams raised almost £3,000 which is a huge success, and all sponsorships for Jailbreak go to the Practical Action charity. Congratulations for everyone who took part!
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Have a chat with Disscussion Society
By Kate Snowdon
Design: Zoe Lin
This month seems to be a good time to introduce you to the Discussion Society, seeing as this edition is all about relationships, and relationships is part of what our society is all about. Not in sense of falling in love obviously, but part of what we do is examine relationships; perhaps between countries, or between politicians, from relationships between the media and the public, to relationships between the country and the monarchy - we have an opinion and we discuss it.
We meet every Monday at 6.30pm in C408, and if you have an opinion on things, or if you just want to learn more and listen to other people’s thoughts, then we’d love for you to come along too. The other sort of relationship we are involved in is building friendships. We are not a debating society, so (although we sometimes challenge each others’ opinions) we take a more casual approach to things - it’s sometimes just a case of a group of people having a deep chat over tea and biscuits!
S o c i e t i e s
Get Active and try out Polercise By Emma Langschied Polercise merges pole dancing with an intense full body workout. Designed to strengthen and tone, improve cardio fitness and boost confidence; sessions will leave you breathless and craving more.
She said, “usually the same people turn up so it’s easier for the instructor to progress them”. So, make sure you race over to get to the studio early to ensure your turn on the podiums!
Active Students run free weekly sessions for students at the Sports Village on the De Havilland campus every Saturday for two hours, starting at 12:30pm.
Both males and females can take part, so why not treat your Valentine by whisking them off to a session. If it’s not their cup of tea, why not sneak to a Polercise session alone and then show them what you learnt later on? Who wouldn’t appreciate a cheeky little performance on Valentine’s Day?
You don’t need to have had experience with a pole before, everyone’s welcome no matter what age, shape or size. Remember to relax - it’s all in aid of fitness and fun! Polercise Activator, Kirsty Feasey, explained that the first twelve students to arrive get the places as “it’s a progression class”.
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Polercise takes the fun part of pole dancing and enhances the fitness element, all without the undesired attention and danger. It may be now or never, so go ahead and add a little flavour to your week.
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C R U S H R A D I O
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Crush Radio Breakfast Shows Monday to Fridays 8am to 10am
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How Was It For You? BY KATE SNOWDON DESIGN · ALICE KAYING LAW
Your relationship with UH is the single most important, and probably most expensive, one of your life at the moment. So it’s vitally important that you have your say on what’s working and what’s not - the key to a good relationship is good communication, right? Unlike most relationships, bringing up your likes and dislikes with UH can be as simple as an online feedback form (where can I set this up for my boyfriend? Lord knows subtle hints don’t work). The NSS survey is also offering some pretty awesome prizes for final year students this year - top prize being a round the world ticket worth £1500! What are you waiting for? Visit go.herts.ac.uk/NSS You can also share your student experiences with Pro Vice Chancellor Andrew Clutterbuck, tweet @UH_Andrew or email A.Clutterbuck@herts.ac.uk
Since the NSS Festival began on 28th January, a new romance is blossoming in the corridors and offices of UH between our uni mascots. Although they were introduced to help promote the NSS survey, I have a feeling these little critters are going to stick around, not least because the staff behind the mascot campaign are all ex-students, making the most of sharing student experiences via the ‘student life’ of Livvie, Geoff and Al. These guys (a bunny, a dog and a monkey) apparently all have different personalities, and for a little bit of fun, I asked the UH marketing department what their story is - this is a relationships issue after all. Apparently our 3 uni mascots are best friends, with a little bit of banter and jealousy in the mix. Livvie and Geoff are a couple, Al fancies Livvie, and the two boys were bests friends long before Livvie joined the group and threw a spanner in the work - sound. Not barmy enough? Well, they also all have a Twitter account that they regularly tweet from, and can sometimes be seen hanging out around the Sport Village. Oh come on, it’s a bit of light-hearted fun.
Olivia (Livvie) - @LivUniofHerts
18 / Electrical and Electronic Engineering / First year Heroes: Liz Bonnin, Cheryl Cole, Tom Daly Favourite music artists: will. i. am, Jesse J, Swedish House Mafia Hobbies: clubbing, stargazing, gaming Olivia joined the University of Hertfordshire’s School of Engineering in September 2012 having aced her A levels in Maths, Biology and Physics. From Cambridgeshire originally, Olivia wanted to study at the University of Hertfordshire because of the great engineering facilities and the proximity to London. “I am completely loving my course here at the University of Hertfordshire and I also find it is great that we can walk to one of the best clubs in the county from our Halls of Residence. If I don’t go home to see my [super large] family at the weekends then I usually spend Friday night in the Forum with Al and Geoff. If we’re short of cash we stay indoors and I smash them on FIFA. On Saturdays I like to meet up with my girlfriends in London for shopping. I’ve also got a couple of mates studying in the Astrophysics department too so sometimes I manage to get over to Bayfordbury and do a bit of stargazing there too.”
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F R O M T H E C O V E R 7
Uni Mascots F
R O M T H E
Alan (Al) - @AlUniofHerts
19 / Mass Communications / First year Heroes: Huw Edwards, Perez Hilton Favourite Music Artists: Pitbull, Flo Rida, Rhianna (maybe not just about the music) Hobbies: blogging, five-a-side football, table tennis Al joined the University of Hertfordshire in September 2012 and started his course in Mass Communications. Originally from Stevenage, Al decided to take a place in Halls of Residence to gain the experience of living away from home and because he knows he’s not developed enough discipline to get in for early lectures from home. “I think the best part of my course is all the writing we get to do – I love creating my blog - and it is great to know I’m building a portfolio for a future career while, as far as I’m concerned, I’m just doing what I love! When I’m not blogging I try to keep fit with my five-a-side footy at the Sports Village. Geoff and I have a bit of a competitive streak so we try to impress the girls with our table tennis skills at the tables around campus too – to be honest I don’t think it works but don’t tell Geoff it would break his heart – he thinks he’s some kind of arty Adonis!”
Geoffrey (Geoff ) - @GeoffUniofHerts 19 / Film and Television / First year
C O V E R 8
Heroes: Alfred Hitchcock, Stephen Spielberg, Ang Li Favourite Music Artists: Fall Out Boy, Fun, Jack’s Mannequin Hobbies: creating short films for YouTube, table tennis, cinema Geoff joined the University of Hertfordshire in September 2012 studying Film and Media, he’s from south London and lives with Livvie and Al in halls of residence on de Havilland Campus. He’s always been interested in film and has high hopes of becoming the next big thing in cinema. You are unlikely to catch him anywhere without a video recorder of some sort about his person so if you are having a clumsy day you may find yourself in a Chuckle Brothers pastiche on his YouTube channel – you have been warned! “I know lots of the films I make end up being YouTube funnies but believe it or not I do consider myself a serious artist – everyone has to start somewhere right? I love the backdrop of the University for my film making – whatever scenery I’m looking for rural, urban, industrial, social - I can find it in this neck of the woods no problem. I love watching people walking to and from lectures and making up stories for them. My friends have all learned that if they don’t want a particular outfit documented (not done any washing this week Al?) then don’t wear it round me. I’m trying to get work experience at the Elstree Studios this summer to boost my experience and start building a network – it is super handy to have such great opportunities so near by.” “When I’m not filming myself I love to watch films, Having the big cinema right opposite where we live is too easy I love it - Livvie and I go most Sunday afternoons - it is nice to have that bit of downtime together before we start another mad week on campus. And there are regular screenings of classic films in the University’s Weston Auditorium too, often with commentary from the director, which is so great when it comes to thinking about my own projects.”
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Are Female Students Safe? By Charlotte Jarman
Design: Elisabeth Schuetz
For many students, coming to university marks a bold step in their lives as they move away from the safety and comfort of home, with little more than a student loan to their name and to fend for themselves at university. A natural outcome of this change is that students are bound to be vulnerable, none more so than female students.
Unisecure, the university’s security department also provides patrols and CCTV to make sure our campuses are safe and secure.” It is clear that most people tend to feel more vulnerable on the College Lane campus. Perhaps this is due to the greater population and density of students seen on this campus in comparison to de Havilland’s spacious residential area.
Between August 2009 and March 2010 The National Union of Students – a body representing the interests of students in higher and further education across the UK, carried out a survey called “Hidden Marks”. Over 2,000 women students based in the UK took part in the survey. The results make for a shocking read.
There also needs to be taken into account the rumoured attacks on women that have taken place on College Lane and a dark area on campus nicknamed by residents as “rape alley”. Having researched these alleged attacks to no avail their validity is questionable. However, the fact that many students feel unsafe on College Lane remains to be an issue.
One in seven female students (14%) have been the victim of serious sexual assault or serious physical violence while at university or college. 12% have been stalked while at university or college. In 60% of these cases of sexual assault or stalking, the perpetrator was also a student. Only 4% of women students who have been seriously sexually assaulted have reported it to their institution. Only 10% of women students who have been seriously sexually assaulted have reported it to the police. Sandra Horley OBE, CEO of domestic violence charity Refuge, said “it is vital that universities create an environment where women feel confident to speak out against abuse. Women students need to know where they can seek help, and must feel sure that their reports will be taken seriously. Women have the right to enjoy university life, focus on their studies and plan for their futures, without fear of intimidation of violence.” To find out more about the safety of female students at the University of Hertfordshire I asked a group of first years about their experiences so far.
Recently, Liberal Democrat MP Lynne Featherstone has called for a ban on page three models in national newspapers claiming it “can help fuel domestic violence”. If there really is a link between the objectification of women and domestic violence then is having events like this cannot be conducive to the safety of female students. I asked the same students how they felt that such events were taking place at their University. Ros Boyes was conflicted by the idea stating that “half of me wants to be like ‘ahh it’s all a bit of fun, but it’s not really fun when women pretend to be prostitutes controlled by men”. In contrast Tola Jaiola took a more casual approach saying “I think it’s a laugh, I don’t really take stuff like that seriously”
F E A T U R E S
However Sonay Küçükterzi took a more negative view, “personally I think its really degrading to women but girls still do it because they want the attention. They’re naive about the impression they give off Social work student Tola Jaiyeola said that she “feels safe on both to other people. I understand that people want to have fun but I campuses as they are both pretty well lit and you can see lots of don’t see why everything has to promote sex. Women say they want security dotted around in their yellow jackets”. Unisecure are the to be equal to men so why would they degrade themselves” security company who patrol both the College Lane and de Havilland campuses ensuring the protection of students and staff. Ben Horwood took the view that “the fact that these events have Music Management student Ros Boyes said that she “does not taken place at the University of Hertfordshire feels like an insult to feel safe alone at night on both campuses although I feel safer its female students. The University should be elevating the status of on the de Havilland campus.” She also noted that regular news of its students and instilling them with confidence to achieve success female students being attacked worries her as she fears she could once they have left university. Instead women are being degraded be targeted. Ros did hasten to add that she was “reassured by the and objectified by these events.” amount of security teams visible on both campuses” The Students’ Union, who are in charge of managing events at Similarly psychology student Sonay Küçükterzi said “I do feel safe The Forum, were not available to respond to my email during the because there’s lots of people I know on de Havilland campus, but Christmas break. not on College Lane, there’s no one to check you actually live there so anyone could walk through”. Although the students I spoke to said they felt much safer due to the presence of security teams on both campuses, it is clear that In contrast, Graphic design student Ben Horwood said “as a man there is a negative stigma attached to the College Lane campus. I feel pretty safe on both campuses, however on the College Lane Taking into account the statistics gathered by NUS, the University campus I do feel a bit more vulnerable because at night there of Hertfordshire’s appointment of Unisecure was a necessary tends to be a lot of drunk people coming out of the Forum and precaution to ensure the safety of its’ students. However, it is also the EleHouse” On the University’s official website information about clear that more care needs to be taken by the Students Union when security is provided in the frequently asked questions section. The they book events at The Forum as previous events have proved to University states that security “spend a lot of time out and about, be offensive to its’ female students. getting to know students and providing general advice and support.
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F E A T U R E S
MARRIAGE: ARRANGED, FORCED OR LOVE..? By Vidhya Bama Design: Elisabeth Schuetz
Sparkling jewellery, colourful gown, a glowing face, hair setting, manicure, pedicure… The list could go on and on in a woman’s mind on her wedding day. It would be the most awaited and memorable day in every woman’s diary. Is mine going to be a love or forced or arranged marriage? These are just some of the questions that tend to cloud every girl’s mind. But, she would also wonder, ‘is he the right guy for me’? On the other hand, the man would also worry about the commitment part, on whether will she be caring and understanding through it all.
takes place within both parties’ consent, to the assistance of their parents, or a third party. A shotgun wedding is an example of a forced marriage. Sadly, it is still practised in parts of South Asia, East Asia and the Middle East.
Both parties will not help but wonder, am I with the right partner? Everyone needs a jumpstart to find someone meant for them. Finding a partner through an arranged marriage should not deter you from falling in love with that person. Love simply means the understanding relationship that both couple have. The key to Arranged marriages are a common practice in most Asian succeeding in any relationship should not be about finding the countries, mostly within the Indian culture. The matches are right person, instead, learning to love the person you found. usually decided by the parents or an older family member. They could also be selected by a matchmaking agent, matrimonial sites And the last, but not least is love marriage, which is very common like the shaadi.com, or a trusted third party. What happens in an with the current generation around the globe. It is seen as practical, arranged marriage is that, the parents or third party chooses a more acceptable and as some say, comprehensible to the modern potential match for their son or daughter, and from that point on, society. It helps both parties get to know each other well, before it’s up to their children to make a decision on their relationship. It taking the crucial decision of life. Even more so now, with today’s could be said though that most arranged marriage is seen as a communication and technology, getting to know someone virtually form of speed dating. Love still exists in arranged marriages, and and then to begin dating has become a convenience. It’s solely its up to the couples to decide if they are meant for each other. in the hand of the couple on taking the relationship to another level. Can meeting someone virtually also be known as a kind of On the other hand, what does a forced marriage mean? This arranged marriage? What if the ‘virtual’ is known as the other third simply means that either side would be forced to ‘tie the knot’ with party? It has come to a point in today’s culture and society that be someone they hardly know, whether they like it or not. Reasons in love, forced or arranged, both couple need to form a bridge of why this occurs vary. One of the reasons could be that the children trust and tolerance against each other. do not wish to hurt their parents feelings by rejecting a proposal set by them. After all, parents know what’s best for their children, While there several types of marriages exist out there, the bottom right? line is to love, understand and accept your better half and lead a blissful life, together. Keep your options open, be it a love or There is, however, a slight difference in a forced and an arranged arranged marriage. We might never know that knight in shining marriage. Forced marriage is where a marriage takes place armour may just need an introduction to meet you! Love sees no without the couple’s consent, or will. However, arranged marriage time. When it happens, it just happens. No rules.
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After Marriage Sex
By Jerrica Leong
In the world of glamorous Hollywood, where sex sells, news about which celebrity is living in another celebrity’s bed is extremely common. But Hollywood isn’t entirely wild and sex crazy, there are a number of celebrities who swore off sex until they say their “I dos”.
Miss Selena Gomez received a purity ring at the age of 12 and has worn it ever since. However, the ring has disappeared ever since her relationship with Justin Bieber which raised speculation but Hollywood predicts that she would follow through with her promise after a lapse into temptation!
Jessica Simpson is another celebrity who saved her V-Card until she was 22. On her reality show Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica, she proudly said announced that “of all the things about myself, staying a virgin until my wedding night is the thing that makes me most proud.”
This may come out as shocking to you, but Victoria Secret Angel Adriana Lima did not have sex until she married her husband Marko Jaric. Lima once made it clear that “sex is for marriage” and she is not afraid to flaunt it since everybody knows that she remained a virgin until the ripe young age of 27! And she’s proud of it!
There are also male celebs that have vowed to be celibate until their wedding bed. The Jonas Brothers said that they would wear their purity rings until they are married. It’s widely known that Kevin Jonas had remained a virgin until his marriage to his childhood sweetheart just a few years ago.
Losing their “Cards” after 20! Surprise, surprise, we actually have a group of celebrities that are not ruled by their hormones. There are a number of celebs who kept their v-cards close to their hearts until they are more mature in life.
The sexy and bootilicious Beyonc actually never had any experience with sex before she met her special someone, although it is purely speculation as she mentioned that hubby Jay-Z is her only romantic experience and she met him when she was in her 20s! bluemoon.uhsu.co.uk
Matthew Morrison, better known as Mr. Schuester, did not lose his virginity until he was 21. When asked about it he joked that he had and his home-coming queen girlfriend in high school suggested that they pray when things got too hot and heavy between them!
Coldplay front man Chris Martin told Rolling Stone magazine that due to his lack of confidence with girls and religious views he did not do “it” until he was 22. The man was more confident with his music than himself! Well we all know that he is passed the stage of having tricky times with girls. /uhsuBluemoon
F E A T U R E S
Jerrica Leong
Everybody’s favourite comedian Tina Fey ranks high on the list because she didn’t get lucky until the age of 24! And no it’s not a joke, in 2009 she told David Letterman that she “couldn’t give it away.”
Design: Elisabeth Schuetz @UHSU_BlueMoon
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S C I E N C E
The Science of Love
Valentine’s has just gone and we all spend it with somebody we love, fancy or wishing we had a special someone is our lives. But what exactly happens in our bodies and brains when we are in love? By Elizabeth Schuetz Design: Älice Kaying Law Photo: Sarah-Louise Burns
Love starts with meeting people and deciding if we fancy them or not - this has to do 55% with body language, 38% with the tone and speed of the voice and 7% with what they say
When we have decided we fancy Adrenaline We all know that strange, nervous feeling when we see our crush. Our heart races, somebody, get to know them and we start to sweat and have a dry mouth. The reason for this it that our stress response is activated start to fall in love. There are three and increases significant stages to it, proposed by Helen Fisher of Rutgers University. Dopamine Taking cocaine has the same effect on the brain as dopamine. Both trigger an intense Stage 1: Lust During this stage we are driven by the sex hormones Testosterone and Oestrogen and we experience more lust than normal. Stage 2: Attraction This is when you are truly wearing rose-couloured glasses and are floating on cloud nine. Responsible for this are adrenaline, dopamine and serotonin. Stage 3: Attachment This is the final stage during which it is thought that oxytocin and vasopressin are responsible for keeping the love alive between couples and making the relationship last.
rush of pleasure. Helen Fisher says that “couples often show the signs of surging dopamine: increased energy, less need for sleep or food, focused attention and exquisite delight in smallest details of this novel relationship.”
Serotonin Can’t get your crush out of your head? Are you constantly thinking about them? Serotonin is responsible for exactly that. Oxytocin This hormone is released during orgasms and it is thought that it makes you feel closer to your partner after sex. So, some theorists claim that the more sex couples have, the closer they feel to each other. Interestingly Oxytocin is also released during childbirth and responsible for the bond between mother and child. Vasopressin Vasopressin is released after sex and is thought to play an important role for the bond in long-term relationships as well.
An Interesting Experiment Professor Arthur Arun, a York-based psychologist, did an interesting experiment with surprising results. He asked his subject to carry out the following three steps: 1. Find a complete stranger. 2. Reveal to each other intimate details about your lives for half an hour. 3. Then, stare deeply into each other’s eyes without talking for four minutes. The result was that many of his subjects felt a deep attraction for the other person and two subjects actually got married later on.
For more information go to http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/hottopics/love/
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Foxy Roxxxy - Sex Robot
By Kate Snowdon
Design: Zoe Lin
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he word Sex can conjure up many thoughts and images, but for the diehard gadget fan, technology is providing an exciting new era in the once ‘un-revolutionary realms of between the sheets. It is no secret that technology is improving our lives, making things better, more convenient, and making us, as individuals, more connected than ever before. So what is it doing for (arguably) the most important area of human nature? It seems the impact of technology on our sex lives is up for debate. Exciting new technologies always have the potential to divide opinion, and this is no different. Ever heard of the iPhone app iPeriod? Yes, there is such a thing. Used for plotting women’s menstrual cycles and giving alerts as to when in a woman’s cycle is she most likely to fall pregnant, the same device can also be used to find out when is the safest time (I use the word ‘safe’ loosely here) of the month to enjoy intercourse without protection. “What a handy app”, I hear you cry! Or perhaps there are a few women out there worrying about losing their excuse of “I can’t tonight, I’m on”. Which brings me to the moral dilemma of bringing technology into relationships: technology doesn’t have to be shared.
Male sex model!!!!
Women, I ask you this, would you be happy for your man to have this app on his phone without you knowing about it? If the answer is “yes”, skip the next paragraph, or maybe the rest of the article – you should probably be baking, or sweeping a floor somewhere and cursing those darn meddling Suffragettes (I jest, obviously). If the answer is a big fat “no” however, continue reading here... No. You’re not happy for this app to be kept a secret from you, and the fact is, it’s probably not a reliable form of birth control if not discussed with the woman in question, and probably a medical professional, first. As much as I like iPhones, I won’t be willing to substitute condoms for them. There is all sorts of room for error here: what if the iPeriod user is to plot the dates of their girlfriend’s last period wrong? (Maybe you actually did get one over on him and he believed your last “I can’t tonight I’m on” lie!) and does it account for the fact that many women’s cycles are not a perfect 28 days? I can see a whole generation of iBaby on the horizon. So, aside from the birth control app, what other ways is technology enhancing our sex lives? Well, apart from the couples’ domain, there is also ‘self-play’. Sex toys are of course nothing new, but what about the sex robot? Over the last seven years two American inventors Douglas bluemoon.uhsu.co.uk
Mr. Hines introduced “Roxxxy” to the world for a mere US$8000+.
Hines and Scott Mclean had been racing head-to-head, robot-to-groin to complete the first fully functioning ‘Fembot’ (female robot for sexual purposes) and as of 2010 the race was won, and Mr. Hines introduced “Roxxxy” to the world for a mere US$8000+. Now, given that masturbating is defined as “erotic stimulation especially of one’s own genital organs commonly resulting in orgasm and achieved by manual or other bodily contact exclusive of sexual intercourse” (Yes, I swallowed a dictionary…. – my goodness, I don’t know if I feel comfortable with that idiom amidst such an article as this) or, in layman’s (and Urban Dictionary’s) terms: “what your 12 year old son or daughter starts doing once their showers go from five minutes to 45 minutes in length”, it does lead me to question; is the use of a Fembot classed as masturbation? Or (creepily) a relationship? Well, inventor Douglas Hines says via their website (.truecompanion.com) that “designing a robot sex doll involves multiple disciplines. We have many electrical engineers, computer science experts, artists, beauty and makeup professionals as well as robotic engineers all working together to provide you with your most life like sex robot which can interact as well as ‘play’ with you”. We look forward to making your dreams of your TrueCompanion come true.” Their website also boasts that “TrueCompanion. com is comprised of a collection of very skilled artists and engineers that have designed the world’s first sex robot. Our caring staff deliver to you the specific sex robot which best meets your specific requirements. Your TrueCompanion. com robot will deliver the ultimate in robot sex. Your sex robot will also be able to talk, listen, carry on a conversation, feel your touch and be your true friend. They can also have an orgasm when you touch them!” Whilst I find the attractiveness of Roxxxy questionable, I’m interested to see how well such a product will a product will take off in the adult market. Is technology enhancing our sex lives?
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T E C H N O L O G Y
You decide…
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P O L I Vows Vote: MPs show support T for same sex marriage rights I C S Design: Kate Snowdon
By Kate Snowdon
The Government’s new bill to legalise same sex marriage has ruffled a few feathers this last fortnight - and not the feathers of the boas, fascinators and other fabulous outfits and accessories that I can’t wait to be seeing in wedding shops and fairs from now on, hopefully! Apologies for playing on a stereotype and all, but I think there are going to be some A-mazing gay weddings on the horizon! Katie Price is going to have to seriously up her game with her biannual marriages if she thinks she stands a chance of staying the queen of weddings! But, alas, I digress, the point is, some stiff-upper lipped, straight from the Stone Age, Conservative MPs aren’t happy. But then, when do you ever see a happy politician?
Luckily, as the stages of the same-sex marriage bill arise, so far, the majority of support has been in favour of equal marriage rights. In fact the figures from the parliamentary vote this month showed 400 MPs voting in favour of the Bill, and 175 voting against. Of those opposing, 136 were Tories. For a Bill to become an Act of Parliament (which basically means a law) it has to go through pre-legislative scrutiny, followed by a debate on the general principles of the bill and then a vote in the House of Commons - which is the stage the Gay Marriage Bill is now at. Next, amendments can be made and there is a full debate on the final text of the bill. It must then be passed through the House of Lords and then finally submitted to Her Majesty the Queen for a Royal Assent to become an Act of Parliament. Yes, the Queen actually does do more than record a dull message every crimbo and admire her own face on her wads of cash (imagine it’s a bit like logging into your Facebook profile and having a little “damn, I look alright” moment – but you get to buy s**** with it too).
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But I suppose the most important thing about all this is understanding why this new law will make a difference. Up until a few days ago, I found myself wondering “what is the difference between a civil partnership and a marriage?” So, here it goes to begin with: the ceremony itself, the titles each partner is entitled to, and the even the way the vows are worded are limited. For example, the ceremony is not required to be public although a marriage is; lesbian couples are not officially recognized as ‘Mrs and Mrs’ and religious text cannot be used during a ceremony (the word ‘marriage’ is considered a religious word). The people that suffer most at the hands of the current system as are those that are transgender, especially if the person transitioning is already in a heterosexual marriage when they begin their change. If trans people wish to remain married they cannot be issued with an amended birth certificate and are not allowed to obtain a full Gender Recognition Certificate, which is required to fully complete gender transition and be legally recognised as male or female. Instead, an Interim Gender Recognition Certificate with a ‘lifespan’ of six months must be obtained, during which time it can be used to annul a marriage. Only then can the issuing of a full Gender Recognition Certificate occur and the couple, should they wish, can enter a Civil Partnership. That means you have to pick – your gender or the legal status of your marriage?! If you’re wanting to escape legal gender-limbo you have to be willing to divorce your beloved partner (who you may have been married for longer than King Richard III has been nicking the best parking spots) just to be able to be in a legal partnership again, which is slightly less valid that what you already had before? It’s crazy, let’s just get this bill rolling?
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10 Years Ago Today ...
2003, a loving year for all, but what did 2003 bring for love, sex and relationships! By Olivia Draisey Let’s look back....
Kim Kardashian made a sex tape with partner Ray J in 2003, but the tape was not leaked until 2007. However, according to reports, new beau and baby daddy Kanye West regularly used the tape to take his sexual partners to bed. Interesting thought, it is also reported to be very proud of his new baby momma because of the tape.
2003 brought us the public scandal surrounding the meeting of Bad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. The pair met on the set of Mr and Mrs Smith. At the time Brad was married to former wife Jennifer Aniston. Two years after Brad met Angelina he and Jennifer decided to separate (2005). Anyone care to guess why? Awkward turtle...
February 2003 was also a special time for Daniel Libeskind, who won the competition to have his design build on the site of the former World Trade Centre. The site, which includes an office building and a “Wedge of Light” projected into the sky, is designed to honour the victims of the September 11th tragedy. The site will provide a sanctuary of peace for the survivors and relatives of the victims, displaying a site of great love and broken relationships.
2003 brought us the year that Britney Spears and Madonna made the public stunt to blow all others out of the water. At the August MTV awards the pair shared more than a stage and shocked the world with their kiss. According to certain sources this raunchy move was Madonna’s idea in rehearsals.
One last note from February 2003, the very first animal to be cloned Dolly the sheep was euthanized. This is a fitting aspect of the year in terms of relationships. Dolly made us all aware that genes could be cloned and thus a new relationship in science was formed!
Finally, I think the weddings should get a mention; below are some of the most popular weddings of 2003.
Henry & Nicole Merry Jude Law & Sadie Frost
...And of course, the celebrity Divorces! Carmen Electra & Dave Navarro Thierry Chris Martin & Gwyneth Paltrow
So there it is, the love, sex and relationship dramas from the year 2003, a question for yourself... Are any of the three marriages above still on? And, have the divorcees married again since then?
Design: Stephen Frost
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Cris Judd & Jennifer Lopez
Angelina Jolie & Billy Bob Thornton
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Do you know something cool that’s happening around UH next month? Email: print.editor@uhsu. co.uk
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By Peng Siang Loh
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COOL FASHION Your style guide for the perfect date outfit
Colour coordination and grooming speak volumes of one’s effort in presenting their very best for the date. An example of colour coordination is by pairing orange with grey. Some key advice is to experiment with pairing colours, as practice makes perfect with colourcoordinated looks. Also, do consider getting a trim a week before February 14th so to keep the hair neat while allowing time for it to grow to just the right length on date night.
By Peng Siang Loh Design: Elisabeth Schuetz
Detail and style are more important on Valentine’s Day than any other day of the year. Dress to impress and woo your date in style by adding distinctive accessories to your outfit, such as the collar pin shown on the left. Another piece advice is to determine your style and dress around it. The last thing you’d want is to be seen as trying too hard for dressing flamboyantly than you usually do and that is unlike you.
Accessories and bold makeup are the highlights this coming season of love. Add a touch of elegance to your wardrobe with statement pieces, such as chunky necklaces, earrings and/or bracelets, and draw attention to your kissable lips with a seductive makeup colour palette of crimson, maroon, burgundy and brown.
Sexy, has always been here. It is in all of us, we just have to understand it, accentuate it and own it. You’ll either have it or you won’t. And DAMN you know when you’ve got it!
Look up ‘sexy’ in the dictionary and under the definition you will find ‘sexually attractive’, ‘sexy lingerie’ and ‘sexy smile’. Yet, how subjective is it - ‘sexy’ to one person may be ‘smutty’ to the next. In 2006 ‘sexy’ apparently went away and if you recall, Justin Timberlake tried to bring it back.
So, to qualify as ‘sexy’ you have to feel good, look good and behave in a way that leaves others wanting more. Think Sophia Loren or James Dean, immaculately presented yet not in a way you know it took them hours to look that way. The polar opposite of the cast from The Only Way is Essex - ‘Oh Shut Up!’ TOWIE lovers.
But what does it really mean to be ‘sexy’? Who’s got it? And what really qualifies as it? To be ‘sexy’ you are perceived to be attractive to the opposite sex, or to the same sex – whatever your preference. Yet to be attractive, you need to have confidence. So are they not the same thing? No. Sexy needs confidence, but too much or too little and sexy is instantly destroyed. Sexy isn’t lingerie. But, it is good lingerie that when on, makes you feel sexy. It can be encapsulated in a smile that says ‘so many things’. Sexy is not brash and its not in your face, it is subtle and mysterious. It’s making an effort at the same time as not giving a s***. It is a little bit naughty and it’s certainly not cute. It’s something that you can fleetingly possess; overdo it and you risk throwing it away.
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Lace and sheer take centre stage this Valentine’s Day for obvious reasons. Ladies, seduce and amuse your dude by putting on the teasing outfit of a sheer dress during the day, and look just as alluring with the lace lingerie as you dress down for an intimate rendezvous by night. Some of the colour suggestions you could consider include nude, red and black.
F A S H I O N
And as far as it goes for sexy going away, I’ve news for you Trousersnake. Sexy never went away, it’s always been here and it’s not going anywhere. Regardless, even if for some crazy reason it did disappear it wouldn’t be you bringing it back! It would be Bradley Cooper.
By Anna Nichols Design: Elisabeth Schuetz /uhsuBluemoon
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Photography: Sarah-Louise Burns
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F Aunty Clare’s O O D
s! e t a d n o g n i k Coo
By Clare Abbott
Need some inspiration for what to eat with your partner this and then leave to simmer for at least an hour until the mixture month? Then why not try these recipes and enjoy a night in starts to thicken. While you’re waiting, why not pour yourself a tasting each other’s delicious cooking? And don’t worry guys; it’s glass of red? really that easy to please your partner with some easy convenient cooking! About 15 minutes before the bolognese is ready, boil some water in a pan and then cook the spaghetti according to the instructions on the packet (normally between 10-15 minutes works well). Drain the spaghetti and serve with the bolognese. Add a little parsley on top to finish it off. Top tips: Why not try some grated cheese or parmesan cheese on top? It tastes great on this dish! If you do use red wine, it gives the bolognese a richer and tastier flavour. Plus a glass of red wine accompanies this dish very well. If you are the type who’s embarrassed to eat spaghetti on a date, then why not have a different sort of pasta, such as penne or farfalle? Otherwise why not recreate the iconic scene from the Lady and the Tramp with your partner? Garlic bread
Ingredients: 1 x large onion 2 x cloves of garlic 1 x tbsp olive oil (cooking oil will do as well) 1 x 400g minced beef (fresh is best) 1 x 400g tin of chopped tomatoes 1 x tbsp tomato puree 1 x red pepper 3 x medium mushrooms 1 x tbsp mixed herbs 1 x 150ml red wine (optional and a cheap brand will do) 2 x servings of spaghetti Some fresh parsley (for presentation)
Main Course: Ladies Version - Spaghetti Bolognese (Please note this recipe makes enough portions for 3-4 people, so you can always save some for another time!) Peel and evenly chop the onion and garlic.
Heat the oil in a large saucepan or frying pan then add the onion and garlic. Cook on a medium heat for about 3 minutes or until the onion and garlic starts to soften.
Preheat the oven to Gas Mark 6/200 degrees.
Ingredients: 2-3 x cloves of garlic 1 x heaped tbsp butter 1 x tsp mixed herbs 1 x part baked ciabatta (or baguette)
Peel and very finely chop the garlic and mix well into the butter in a dish. Sprinkle on the mixed herbs and mix well. Using a bread knife cut into the bread as many slices as you would prefer but don’t put the knife through right to the bottom! Then spread the butter mixture into the slices and wrap the whole ciabatta into foil.
Put into the oven for 1520 minutes and Add the minced beef and cook on the heat until there is serve immediately, no pink visible in the meat. Make sure to stir it well while it’s preferably with cooking. the spaghetti bolognese or even Pour in the chopped tomatoes and add the tomato puree; as a starter! stir well and leave to simmer for about 5 minutes. Enjoy your Evenly chop the pepper and mushrooms and stir well into dinner! the mixture. Sprinkle the mixed herbs and then pour in the wine. Stir well
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Gentleman’s Version: Lasagne served with garlic bread Ingredients: 2 x readymade lasagnes Grated cheese (parmesan if you’re feeling fancy) Fresh parsley (a definite!) 1 x garlic bread baguette find that they are often tastier this way.
Follow the instructions on the packaging for the lasagne. It’s quicker to cook them in the microwave but I would recommend cooking them in the oven, as I
Top tips: It’s not always easy to make something look homemade when it’s not, so the extra little touch of parsley and cheese on top helps to try to make it look authentic. Plus your partner can’t go wrong if you serve it with a glass of lovely red wine (maybe an expensive bottle to compensate for the cooking!)
Follow the instructions on the packaging for the garlic bread; you could probably cook it in the oven while the lasagne is in the oven (but do watch your timings though!)
plate.
Once cooked, preferably using a metal fish slice, carefully take the lasagne out of the packaging and place onto a
F O O D
Sprinkle the grated cheese on top and don’t forget the parsley for that extra little touch.
Aphrodisiac food - A bite and you´re on your way By Clare Abbott
Need something to spice up your night with your special someone? Then why not try some different foods known as aphrodisiacs, on their own or as part of a dish to get not just your taste buds tingling. Who knew that foods could do such a thing?!
Another popular food which undoubtedly heightens the mood is chocolate. We’ve all seen the attractive women seductively eating chocolate on TV adverts and how people claim that chocolate is a substitute for sex. The reason for this is because dark chocolate contains many natural stimulants to help you feel the vibes you need. One of the compounds it contains is phenethylamine (aka PEA and the “love chemical”) which causes the brain to feel pleasure and increase sensations such as attraction and excitement. So dark chocolate is a definite on the list of foods to get you in the mood! Why not be extra naughty and try dipping strawberries and bananas into melted dark chocolate?
The food you eat every day has a direct impact upon your body and its bodily functions, affecting your energy and stress levels and hormones. Aphrodisiacs are different sorts of food that cause reactions in your body that help to get you in the mood, such as increased blood flow to certain areas of the body, higher body temperatures and increased heart rate. Of course there are foods which psychologically cause arousals due to their shape and appearance but a lot Other examples of foods which are classed aphrodisiacs are of aphrodisiacs create chemical reactions within your body which figs, avocados, asparagus, chillies and surprisingly garlic, since help you and your partner get in the mood. garlic is packed with allicin which helps to increase your blood flow. So maybe you could make sure to eat some garlic bread One food which is definitely classed as an aphrodisiac is the (don’t forget some mints!) However, the food substance which banana, most obviously because of its shape. However, bananas is probably most associated are loaded with potassium, magnesium and vitamin B6, which if with being an aphrodisiac is consumed in a healthy intake helps to regulate your hormones. the oyster. Apparently they In addition, the sugar content of a banana will help to keep you have a tendency to help you up through the night as well as being a healthy food substance. get in the mood because of Another fruit you can enjoy is the strawberry, which is full of their high zinc content. No vitamin C and the smell and taste of it really makes your senses wonder many people decide enchanted. So of course, you can really enjoy the benefits of being to eat oysters when they go healthy! for a romantic meal!
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L Beyond Fifty Shades.. By Kealie Mardell I T E R A T U R E Last summer the world of literature got a saucy shock as Fifty Shades of Grey rose to the top of the charts in what proved to be a very hot summer. For anyone who missed it, Fifty Shades of Grey is part of a trilogy of erotic fiction by E.L James, nicknamed ‘mummy-porn’. With sexual fantasies, kinky dungeons, bondage and more, there was undoubtedly a lot of scandal surrounding these books. It seemed that whatever your opinion, everyone had to read them.
Following the success of Fifty Shades, an army of sexy lit swarmed the shelves, each one promising to out-sex the last. So here’s a run-down of some of the biggest names, each claiming to spice up your sex life and leave you sizzling.
The Crossfire Series by Sylvia Day
(Bared to You, Reflected in You, Entwined with You)
The crossfire novels claim to be intensely romantic, darkly sensual and completely addictive. Sylvia Day explores the limits of obsession, and takes you far beyond anything you could have imagined. Not too far from the realms of Fifty Shades, The Crossfire Series follows the tale of Gideon and Eva, two wounded souls whose lives become entwined in an intoxicating mix of lust and passion. Critics have said that Day’s characters are better developed, with sexier scenes and a better storyline than James’.
The After Dark Series by Sadie Mathews
(Fire After Dark, Secrets After Dark, Promises After Dark)
After Dark is another successful erotic trilogy, but a bit more tentative than the others. It’s been called a good beginning and safer way to ease into the world of BDSM. Mathews has an easy writing style, which draws you into a new relationship and takes on romance and mysteries in a vivid and descriptive form. If Fifty Shades was a bit much for you than this could be the place to start.
The Avalon Trilogy by Indigo Bloome
(Destined to Play, Destined to Feel, Destined to Fly)
The Avalon Trilogy follows the story of Psychologist Alexandra, as she takes on an erotic journey with her new lover Jeremy Quinn. Packed full of all the innermost fantasies and daring boundaries you would expect, Bloome provides another realm of trust and betrayal. In the second instalment Alexandra is abducted, and finds that what seemed like fun and curiosity can actually be a dangerous game. A warning to all I feel?
Sinners Series by Tiffany Reisz
(The Siren, The Angel, The Prince) Reisz’s collection has met to a generally good reception, even being called ‘heart-breakingly beautiful’ which is a mean feat for this genre of fiction. Critics of E.L. James dismissed the poorly constructed writing style, but Reisz has been praised for her prose. Ultimately a love story with a darker side, this style could be the future for sexy stories.
Design: Kealie Mardell
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A Cute Love Story by Clare Abbott
You tenderly kissed me with your lips. Now my heart was dancing with happiness As you lovingly held my hips.
On a beautiful sunny day When the grass was still wet with dew, A walk in the lush green park Was the first time that I met you.
Under the beauty of the stars I felt warm and secure. As we continued to kiss I knew that you were the one for sure.
Your radiant smile and stunning eyes Made my heart gently melt away. Your harmonious voice and calm complexion Gave me courage to ask “Stay with me today.”
After that amazing night I felt like the happiest person in the world. I had discovered the beauty of love And then even more unfurled.
I never wanted this perfect day to end As we gaily strolled in the sunshine. Just before we departed our own ways You nervously asked me to dine.
I was at your house one evening After having enjoyed a night out. You placed one knee on the floor And you took a gorgeous ring out.
I thought it was really adorable How you blushed when asking the question. My heart was filled with joy And I gladly accepted without exception.
It sparkled in your radiant eyes And you proposed beautifully. I accepted with tears of joy And we kissed each other passionately.
On a tranquil pretty evening We dined by the desirous setting sun. We had such engaging conversations And I definitely had plenty of fun.
I awoke the next morning Entwined in your wondrous arms. Your love that night was glorious And you awoke to gently kiss my palms.
After our first anxious meeting We met each other frequently. In the park and during nights out Our relationship developed accordingly.
Now I wait for our marriage date: A special day to become joined with you. I am the happiest person in the world And … I love you.
During our wonderful times together I realised there was something new. Each time I saw you my heart blushed, As a developing love for you grew.
She’s Seen It Many Times In The Movies
My heart started to pound faster Each time I went to see you. I desired to be more than friends; I wanted to say those special words to you. On one beautiful night out We stood under the luminous moon. When I was about to confess The bells chimed at noon. During the toll of the bells Your voice harmonised perfectly. My face must have been blushing Because you said your words amazingly. This was the happiest moment of my life As you held the same feelings as me. I was under your seductive charm And my blemishing heart felt free. On the night of our confessions
By Clare Abbott
Idealisation Far, far, away True love In an instant Making love as if it were dream like She dreams it so...
L I T E R A T U R E
Falls for him on first sight Alone she is for the night He takes her hand He doesn’t understand They dance the night away Empty handed they lay Kissing by candlelight No one to caress tonight Awake cuddled in each other arms Before long they are both gone On their separate ways...
Design: Kealie Mardell bluemoon.uhsu.co.uk
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MERLIN
best on-screen couples
Design: Cara Zaleski
Guinevere: “Is it true? Are you really here? Please don’t let me be dreaming.” Arthur: “You’re not dreaming, Gwen. The nightmare is over.” We know a beautiful love story is in the making when the Crown Prince chooses to court a palace maid over a princess. After three years of overcoming various challenges thrown at them, one of which involves the betrayal of trust involving Guinevere and Lancelot, the once exiled palace maid is now crowned the Queen to rule Camelot alongside King Arthur in Merlin.
GOSSIP GIRL
Chuck: “Your world would be easier if I didn’t come back.” Blair: “That’s true. But it wouldn’t be my world without you in it.” Blair Waldorf and Chuck Bass have an itch that only each other can scratch. Known for their complicated relationship involving mischievous games and scheming together, the on-screen couple has gone through numerous heartaches, which include Chuck’s commitment issue and Blair’s denial to admit her love for Chuck. It would be interesting to witness the six-year journey of these two souls before they tie the knot in the sixth and final season of Gossip Girl.
HAVEN
Audrey: “Uh, how ‘bout I make pancakes?” Nathan: “We talking about dinner or..or break…breakfast?” Haven is a damned town and so are the locals, including police detective Nathan Wuornos, who is cursed with the inability to feel. Everything changes when FBI agent Audrey Parker arrives at the town for a murder case investigation. It appears that Nathan can feel Audrey and Audrey only. This oddity makes Nathan interested in her. However, he later finds ROOKIE BLUE out that Audrey holds the answer to Haven’s grim fate. Where does Andy: “Promise me something. If things go their relationship go from here and what awaits them at the end? Watch south with us, and I don’t want them to and I Haven to find out. hope they don’t, but if they do, then don’t, don’t just walk out the door, okay? Let’s promise to work at it.” Sam: “You won’t get rid of me without a fight.” Rookie cop Andy McNally joins 15 Division under the supervision of her training officer, Sam Swarek. It does not take long for them to start developing feelings for one another. Given that every now and then their workplace romance jeopardises the department’s mission and putting their colleague’s life at stake, this makes Rookie Blue an SUITS even thrilling watch to learn how the two cope with their Rachel: “I just expect more from you than most people.” romantic bond while doing their job to serve and protect. Mike:”Why?” Rachel: “You’re a smart guy. You can figure it out.” Mike Ross is hired as a lawyer despite not having a law degree. What’s more interesting is when Rachel, a smart and beautiful paralegal, is accused of leaking confidential documents, Mike comes to the rescue. Their relationship grows but Mike just started dating another girl. At the same time, Rachel kisses Mike and later has an argument with him, accusing Mike of leading her on by flirting with her when he is already seeing someone. Catch Suits to witness how the two resolve the issue and how a bittersweet romance unfolds.
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CRINGE movie moments
F Design: Cara Zaleski
By Saidah Graham
E
ver gone to the cinema to see a simple chick-flic, to have a little chuckle, maybe a cry, but reached some point in the film where you just want to crawl into a hole and die? Those scenes or moments where there is an awkward silence or you’re turning away from cringing. Well I’ve compiled a list of some of those moments.
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Meg Ryan – When Harry Met Sally – The Restaurant Scene. I shirk away when this scene comes on, pitying Billy Crystal’s character as he is mocked and then publically embarrassed by his fake-climaxing friend. Ben Stiller – There’s Something about Mary – The Zipper scene. Your girl thinks you’re being a pervert when you’re just going for a simple tinkle. Then the worst moment of your life when the whole neighbourhood finds out you zipped yourself into your pants.
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Maya Rudolph – Bridesmaids – The Poop Train. The slow descent into the road as you suffer from diarrhoea in a wedding dress is about 10% hilarious and 90% horrifically cringe-worthy. The whole scene was heartbreakingly cringey on all accounts.
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Vince Vaughn & Isla Fisher – The Wedding Crashers – The Dinner. Being touched up around the dinner table and having a conversation with the girl’s parents at the same time. Classic awkwardness. Katherine Heigl – The Ugly Truth – The Underwear. Imagine the ‘When Harry Met Sally’ scene but actually real and in front of people who actually know you. Awkward.
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Ben Stiller – Meet the Parents – Milking cats. The most embarrassing situations happen when you lie, but it’s Robert De Niro’s killer comeback; ‘I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?’ that takes the cake. I have to say... worst family dinner ever. Steve Carell – 40 Year Old Virgin – The Condoms. Condoms littered everywhere and then the daughter of the woman your with, walks in and is angry that her mother’s having sex and she isn’t.
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Michael Cera – Superbad – Boob punch. Not everyone has awkward flowing out of their veins like Michael Cera, but punching the girl you like in the chest is too much.
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Josh Hartnett – 40 days and 40 nights – Dinner. Your dad just talking about him and his mum having sex and detailing positions, not weird at all, nope. Ben Stiller & Cameron Diaz – There’s Something about Mary – The hair gel. Come on. Do I even have to explain how awkward and gross that scene was? Ben Stiller – Along Came Polly – Toilet Roll. It’s awkward enough that you have to poop in someone else’s house, but then a ferret comes in and there isn’t any toilet roll? The flooded toilet, embroidered towel and the loofer just put the icing on an awkward cake. bluemoon.uhsu.co.uk
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Design: Cara Zaleski
By Kat Morgan Over the past couple of years, TV has been delighting us with programmes addressing unusual types of love. Now, I don’t know about you but I find these shows fascinating. On Channel 4 at the moment, a second series of the highly successful The Undateables is gracing our screens where people with unusual characteristics, such as tourettes, OCD and autism sign up to agencies in order to find love. Entertaining yet humble at the same time, the programme opens your eyes to all the ways in which love can come. If you haven’t had the chance to watch this series yet, you can find it on 4OD.
Moving over to Channel 5, former Welsh rugby player Gareth Thomas took part in a harrowing documentary, My Secret Past: Gareth ThomasComing Out where he frankly told his journey of coming out as a gay man to not only his friends and family but also his wife. The programme addresses the harsh reality that many people still have difficulties with accepting their true sexuality. Don’t Tell the Bride, shown on BBC Three, has been a success for the last six years, with versions being made in the USA and Australia. The show follows a couple getting married but with a twist. The groom has to plan the ENTIRE wedding with a budget of £12,000 but there can be no input from the bride. Over the past six series, the show has seen brides skydiving to their ceremony and the rather stressful Vegas wedding where half the bride’s family didn’t make the wedding. The show will make you laugh, cry, and more often than not scream at the groom when he is
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Also on Channel 4, the award winning My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding has shown the world the traditional and often private marital values so importantly kept by this sector of society. With the often shocking activity of grabbing and the incredible Barbie princess dresses, the show is an ultimately guilty pleasure with every women secretly wanting their own glow in the dark gown with pineapple bridesmaids! More shocking shows have been on the TV recently, such as the rather unique Adult Babies whereby adult men and women enjoy dressing up as babies with a ‘mother’ or ‘father’ taking care of them. Although within much of the programme there are claims of no sexual activities taking place while people are dressed up, the programme addresses the strained and often secretive relationships shared by the adult babies and their partners. On the subject of fetish programmes, last year Channel 4 also aired My Big Fat Fetish which followed four ‘big beautiful women’ trying to make it in to the increasingly popular niche market of magazines and online presents of bigger women. Addressing the image of beauty which is not the norm is interesting with the British girls heading over to the US where the market is much more popular. bluemoon.uhsu.co.uk
So there are just some of the love and sex themed programmes which have been on TV in the last year. They are all available on 4OD, 5OD, and BBC iPlayer.
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Love songs, sex jams and more... By Olivia Draisey
For this music section, I’m going to look at all sorts of love. Section one, covers love songs, for those lucky people happy and in love, and hate hand pullers, for those of you who scream out songs in your bedroom and pull your hand down at those ever so crucial moments. Section two, covers Sex Jams, songs to get you in the mood and keep you there, whilst craving cringers are for the little person inside you saying I WANT A BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND!
Love Songs Vs. Hate Hand Pullers
Sex Jams Vs. Craving Cringers
There are just so many of them it is hard to come up with a few, so instead I am just going to show my three favourites.
The next few songs are the ones that get everyone in the mood, asked around and these are definitely the favourites!
Song one, perfect for a romantic moment, summing up how you feel in a song! Artist: The Ordinary Boys Song: I Love You Favourite Lyric: “I love you, you know that don’t you”
Song one, is for the rockier population, the title pretty much explains all. Artist: Kings Of Leon Song: Sex on Fire Favourite Lyric: “And yeah, your sex is on fire”
Song two, this songs great for fresh young love, a song about finding love in the strangest of places. Artist: Rihanna Song: We Found Love Favourite Lyric: “We found love in a hopeless place”
Song two, is one most definitely for the bedroom only. Artist: J Holiday Song: Bed Favourite Lyric: “Now stop, let me repay you for the week that you’ve been through”
Song three, is a personal favourite, it’s just so cheesy that you always have to smile... Artist: Taylor Swift Song: Love Story Favourite Lyric: “Romeo take me, somewhere we can be alone, I love you and that’s all I really know”
Song three, is one for “making love”, a beautiful song for all couples to share some time together to. Artist: Bon Jovi Song: All About Loving You Favourite Lyric: “Every time I look at you, baby, I see something new”
Looking for Revenge
Looking for Love
Song one, is one that is a little more for the female audience, but not always! Artist: Beyonce Song: If I Were a Boy Favourite Lyric: “It’s a little too late for you to come back, to say it’s just a mistake, think I’ll forgive you like that, if you thought I would wait for you.. you thought wrong”
My first song could not sum this section up any better. Artist: Paramore Song: All I Wanted Was You Favourite Lyric: “Think of me, when you’re out, when you’re out there, I’ll beg you nice from my knees”
Song two, once again comes from the queen of song writing post bad or good relationships, this one must have ended pretty badly... Artist: Taylor Swift Song: We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together Favourite Lyric: “Baby, I miss you and I swear I’m gonna change, trust me, remember how that lasted for a day”
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For you souls out there who are looking for love, or have found it and you are waiting for that significant other to notice.
Once again, for song two, she does it again! Artist: Taylor Swift Song: You Belong With Me Favourite Lyric: “If you could see that I’m the one who understands you, been here all along, so why can’t you see, you belong with me”
Finally, song three, is a classic for really getting your anger out, especially designed for men. Artist: Cee Lo Green Song: F**k You (Forget You) Favourite Lyric: “Guess the change in my pocket wasn’t enough, so F you and F her too”
Finally, my last song for this section is one for the silly ones, who let someone go and well, want them back! Artist: Jackson 5 Song: I Want You Back Favourite Lyric: “And now it’s much too late for me to take a second look”
So, that is it, for my lists of songs needed to cover all aspects of love, sex and relationships! I hope you enjoyed it, and enjoy these even more! However, the ultimate love songs will have to come from the greats and to mention a few: Whitney Houston – I Will always love you and Bon Jovi - Always. Happy Screaming!
Design: Kealie Mardell
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This week’s issues: Love, Sex and Relationships : The truth Matters! Design: Jessica Crighton
Dear Olivia Welcome to UHSU’s problem page, I am going to be your very own agony aunt and I want hear about all of your problems. Everything you send to me is completely confidential and you will be printed as anonymous unless you request otherwise. I want to hear about you relationships, your home life, university or work problems but most of all I just want to hear from you. I will do my best to answer as many of your questions as I can, in this issue I am discussing love, sex and relationships. These are a few questions taken from those around me.
Hiya, UHSU agony aunt, I am 20 years old and I am still a virgin, I am scared that this will put people off from being with me. What should I do, should I pretend that I have already done it? Anonymous A. Hiya Anonymous A, You should be proud of this, not ashamed! Granted it isn’t considered ‘cool’ to have not had sex by this age. But, it is not embarrassing at all, in fact you may find that many people will admire you for it. This only means that you have not let yourself go to any old random from the Forum, instead you have waited. Waiting is the best option, this will not put anyone off, and if it does, they are clearly not the person you should be sharing your first time with. Don’t be scared of this, and most certainly don’t lie about it, the truth matters.
If you have any questions for me, please don’t hesitate to give us a message on facebook, tweet us or send us an email print.editor@uhsu.co.uk.
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Hiya UH agony aunt, I am 19 years old and have just moved here to university, I have always been uncertain of how I feel about the opposite sex. It seems that I find both sexes attractive; I just don’t know how to tell anyone because I worry that they will think I am weird. Any help? Anonymous B. Hiya Anonymous B, Once again, I would like to congratulate you on coming forward with this. The issue of sexuality is always difficult to come to terms with. I find that those who are certain about their sexuality tend to ignore how easy it has been and will be for them. Conversely, those who take longer to understand themselves are viewed as odd. This is not true. We all struggle to find ourselves, and this can take many years. The fact that you are now understanding that you may be bisexual, there are so many others like yourself, even in the ever-so-perfect celebrity world, the likes of Pink, Lady Gaga and Megan Fox have all reported feeling this way. It is a completely normal feeling for you. You should first of all find a close friend to confide in, they are your best chance of telling the world. Like a snowball one person can help you to finally reveal this to others and the group of people that know and that inevitably still accept you for you will grow and grow. Bisexual is merely a label for a sexuality, just as hetero is, so accept that and accept who you are, once again the truth matters!
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WORD SEARCH - THE MANY EXES OF TAYLOR SWIFT By Rachel Smith What would Valentine’s Day be without the Queen of love songs? Taylor Swift has been connected to many different men: can you find some of them in the wordsearch?
Harry Styles Jake Gyllenhaal Patrick Schwarzenegger Garrett Hedlund Joe Jonas Zac Efron Lucas Till Cory Monteith Taylor Lautner Eddie Redmayne Chord Overstreet Toby Hemingway John Mayer Conor Kennedy Tim Tebow Will Anderson Crossword by Saidah Graham
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