Dear Teachers

QA DEARTEACHERS &

BY PEGGY GISLER AND MARGE EBERTS

HOW TO HELP A POOR SPELLER

QUESTION: My second grader just doesn’t do well

on spelling tests. He has never been a good speller, and he is only a fair reader. What are some things that can be done to improve his spelling? – Poor Speller

ANSWER: Some people think that the spelling of English words is crazy and unpredictable and use that as an excuse for children’s being poor spellers. They are wrong. The spelling of about 50 percent of all English words is based on sound-letter correspondence, and another close to 40 percent are almost predictable except for one sound. Admittedly, this leaves the spelling of about 10 percent of all words to be memorized (sight words).

When children first begin to spell words, they do not yet have down pat the sounds of individual letters. So they use just a few letters to spell a word. This early spelling common with 5- and 6-yearold children is called inventive spelling. However, encouraging students to use this way of spelling beyond the beginning of first grade is not considered a good approach to learning to spell. Children learn to spell first by understanding that words are made up separate speech sounds and that these sounds are represented by letters. Then they move onto noticing patterns in words they spell (cat, bat, mat). The next step is learning about syllables, prefixes, suffixes, word endings and basic spelling rules. Poor spellers are often poor readers, as they have not mastered the connection between letters and sounds.

You should be able to help your child become a better speller and at the same time a better reader because the two require many of the same skills. A chat with his teacher is needed to pinpoint exactly what is holding him back from being a better speller. The teacher can give your child a diagnostic spelling test that will let you both see what consonant and vowel sounds and word spellings he needs to know. If the teacher suspects that the problem is dyslexia, more specialized help will be needed.

Once you know where your child needs help, begin to teach him a few consonant letters that he cannot yet sound out. The teacher can provide you with worksheets, or you can find worksheets and workbooks online and in stores with these sounds to use with him. Once he has mastered these sounds, work with him on predictably spelled words that use these sounds and other ones he knows. Hopefully, you will be able to use some words on the weekly spelling list. Move slowly, only teaching new consonants when earlier ones have been mastered. Once all the consonants have been mastered, move on to working with syllables and then a few basic spelling rules. At this point he should be a muchimproved speller. While teaching the consonant sounds, introduce a few sight words. He can trace them and then write them to learn these often difficult-to-spell words.

HANDLING FRUSTRATION WITH HOMEWORK

QUESTION: At times, my seventh

grader totally loses her cool when frustrated with a difficult homework assignment. Telling her to calm down just doesn’t work. What should I do? – Frustrated, Too

ANSWER: Trying to calm a child when she is in the middle of a meltdown does not work. She is just too worked up to listen. She should walk away from working on the assignment to calm herself. When the child begins to calm down, you can be empathetic expressing that you know how frustrated she must feel and also offer to help. Or hopefully, once the child is over the meltdown, she may just tackle what has frustrated her on her own.

To avoid future homework assignment meltdowns, you need to sit down with your child and show her techniques for learning a difficult assignment. The first thing to have her do is to consult her textbook (this works best for math and English) to examine work similar to what she is being asked to do. Studying class notes is another way to find examples of the work that she is attempting to do. At times, she can find online help by searching for similar work. There are tutorials on a wide range of subjects, so she should be fairly specific in her search.

If the above approaches do not work, you could do some teaching so she understands the assignment. You should never do the work for her. If you are unable to help her, have her move on to work she can do. The next day when the homework is discussed, she should get the answers she needs. Or she can request special help from the teacher.

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As a mom of multiples, I have noticed they tend to get grouped together and referred to as “The Triplets.” This comes from people both in our family and outside it. Many assume that because one likes a certain food, they all do. Or if one enjoys a particular activity, they all love it. This is simply not the case. It can be hard to remember—especially if you have identical twins—that each and every child has his own unique personality and tastes. Those outside the family unit may have an even harder time remembering and recognizing. So how do you foster individuality in multiples and how do you help others recognize it as well?

Treat them as individuals

The best way to begin to appreciate the unique qualities of multiples is to treat them as individuals. Speak to each oneon-one about her day, her likes and her dislikes. Spend time separately with each child. Help others recognize twins as two separate people by dressing them differently. Encourage them to pick out their own clothing and choose items they prefer. Avoid referring to them as “the twins” but instead use both their names. Say, “I need to pick up Jack and Josh from school,” rather than, “I need to pick up the twins.” These habits will help others see them as two separate people. Choose activities they love

Some multiples may all choose to play on the same soccer team, but in other cases one may love soccer, and another may prefer swimming. Allow the children to choose what activities they want to do, even if it means two separate activities entirely. This approach helps each develop his own natural gifts and personality. Pursuing a passion also creates a sense of identity for the child and helps others see his unique qualities as well.

Acknowledge their gifts

Each child has different gifts and natural talents. Take note of these things as you play with your children. Just as any two siblings would have differences in development, interests and talents, so will multiples. One of my triplets is excellent at building blocks, one loves dancing and singing, and the other is a people person and very sensitive to

how to recognize unique qualities in your kids

others. On the other hand, they all love to read books and play outside. As you take the time to notice their similarities and differences in daily life, you will begin to see each as an individual and appreciate and embrace those differences.

Foster friendships

As children grow, they begin to form relationships outside of their household. Encourage your children to develop friendships with others, even making their “own” friends. Some parents may choose to put their multiples in separate classrooms at school for this very reason. Individual friendships between one twin and another child help build confidence and develop unique qualities in multiples who are very much influenced by their siblings.

Sarah Lyons is a proud mother of six children, including 6-year-old fraternal triplets.