Keepers Of The UnderWorld June 2011

ISSUE 12

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Contents:

Page:

Welcome Events for June Humor Crafts and Rituals Meditation Knowledge and Principals The Green Witch Poetry Featured Stories Personal Journeys Witches Rant Lady Pandora's Movie Review Pandora's Music Box The Cheshire mad book reviews Recipes Keepers Member Articles Keeper of the Realm's Featured Groups Pagan UnderWorld Member Articles Pagan UnderWorld Featured Member Of The Month Pagan UnderWorld Featured Groups Shadow of the Black Rose Articles Shadow of the Black Rose Featured Groups This Months Horoscopes And Chinese Astrology Other Great Sites Metal shows Events

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4 5 13 18 28 31 47 63 68 76 113 120 122 123 126 129 143 145 157 162 166 183 185 218 219

Lifestyles Tool Queens Fetish Balls and Events Fetish Article's LGBT

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243 250 252

Welcome friends to another fabulous issue of our wonderful magazine! As always, we thank you for taking your time to read us. In this issue you will find a wonderful article about Autism. It's a must read my friends! Its time to educate ourselves and support more education and research. And there is also the witches rant,we also have the events that will coming to a town near you. You want to know what movie you should take in or what band is up and coming?? Yup we have it! Or if its a story or wonderful poetry you want yes we've got that too! check out what going on in the ning universe and Pagan UnderWorld. Or want to just kick back with whips and chains check out what fetish ball is coming to your town. If you want to see your words or thoughts published in our Magazine send your entries to either Sweet Dark Angel or to Andrew Rutledge At either the keepers of the Realms or at Pagan UnderWorld.

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Moon Phases New moon 06\01\2011 1st quarter Full moon

06\09\2011 06\15\2011

Last quarter 06\23\2011 Fathers day

Fathers day is June 19 let us take this day and wish all our dads out there A happy fathers day.

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Litha Also known as Summer Solstice, Litha, Alban Hefin, Sun Blessing, Gathering Day, Feill-Sheathain, Whit Sunday, Whitsuntide, Vestalia, Thing-tide, St. John's Day In addition to the four great festivals of the Pagan Celtic year, there are four lesser holidays as well: the two solstices, and the two equinoxes. In folklore, these are referred to as the four 'quarter-days' of the year, and modern Witches call them the four 'Lesser Sabbat's', or the four 'Low Holidays'. The Summer Solstice is one of them.

Litha is usually celebrated on June 21st, but varies somewhat from the 20th to the 23rd, dependant upon the Earth's rotation around the Sun. According to the old folklore calendar, Summer begins on Beltane (May 1st) and ends on Lughnassadh (August 1st), with the Summer Solstice midway between the two, marking MID-Summer. This makes more logical sense than suggesting that Summer begins on the day when the Sun's power begins to wane and the days grow shorter. The most common other names for this holiday are the Summer Solstice or Midsummer, and it celebrates the arrival of Summer, when the hours of daylight are longest. The Sun is now at the highest point before beginning its slide into darkness.

Humanity has been celebrating Litha and the triumph of light since ancient times. On the Wheel of the Year Litha lies directly across from Yule, the shortest day of the calendar year, that cold and dark winter turning when days begin to lengthen and humanity looks wistfully toward warmth, sunlight and growing things. Although Litha and Yule are low holidays or lesser sabats in the ancient parlance, they are celebrated with more revel and merriment than any other day on the wheel except perhaps Samhain (my own favorite). The joyous rituals of Litha celebrate the verdant Earth in high summer, abundance, fertility, and all the riches of Nature in full

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bloom. This is a madcap time of strong magic and empowerment, traditionally the time for handfasting or weddings and for communication with the spirits of Nature. At Litha, the veils between the worlds are thin; the portals between "the fields we know" and the worlds beyond stand open. This is an excellent time for rites of divination.

Those who celebrated Litha did so wearing garlands or crowns of flowers, and of course, their millinery always included the yellow blossoms of St. John's Wort. The Litha rites of the ancients were boisterous communal festivities with morris dancing, singing, storytelling, pageantry and feasting taking place by the village bonfire and torch lit processions through the villages after dark. People believed that the Litha fires possessed great power, and that prosperity and protection for oneself and one's clan could be earned merely by jumping over the Litha bonfire.

It was also common for courting couples joined hands and jump over the embers of the Litha fire three times to ensure a long and happy marriage, financial prosperity and many children. Even the charred embers from the Litha bonfire possessed protective powers - they were charms against injury and bad weather in harvest time, and embers were commonly placed around fields of grain and orchards to protect the crops and ensure an abundant reaping. Other Litha customs included carrying an ember of the Litha fire home and placing it on one's hearth and decking one's home with birch, fennel, St. John's Wort, orpin, and white lilies for blessing and protection.

The Litha Sabbat is a time to celebrate both work and leisure, it is a time for children and childlike play. It is a time to celebrate the ending of the waxing year and the beginning of the waning year, in preparation for the harvest to come. Midsummer is a time to absorb the Sun's warming rays and it is another fertility Sabbat, not only for humans, but also for crops and animals. Wiccans consider the Goddess to be heavy with pregnancy from the mating at Beltane - honor is given to Her. The Sun God is celebrated as the Sun is at its peak in the sky and we celebrate His approaching fatherhood - honor is also given to Him. The faeries abound at this time and it is customary to leave offerings - such as food or herbs for them in the evening.

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Although Litha may seem at first glance to be a masculine observance and one which focuses on Lugh, the day is also dedicated to the Goddess, and Her flowers are the white blossoms of the elder.

Correspondences Purpose Rededication to the Lord and Lady, beginning of the harvest, honoring the Sun God, honoring the pregnant Goddess Dynamics/Meaning Crowning of the Sun God, death of the Oak King, assumption of the Holly King, end the ordeal of the Green Man Tools, Symbols & Decorations The sun, oak, birch & fir branches, sun flowers, lilies, red/maize/yellow or gold flower, love amulets, seashells, summer fruits & flowers, feather/flower door wreath, sun wheel, fire, circles of stone, sun dials and swords/blades, bird feathers, Witches' ladder.

Colors Blue, green, gold, yellow and red.

Customs Bonfires, processions, all night vigil, singing, feasting, celebrating with others, cutting divining rods, dowsing rods & wands, herb gathering, handfastings, weddings, Druidic gathering of mistletoe in oak groves, needfires, leaping between two fires, mistletoe (without berries, use as a protection amulet), women walking naked through gardens to ensure continued fertility, enjoying the seasonal fruits & vegetables, honor the Mother's fullness, richness and abundance, put garlands of St. John’s Wort placed over doors/ windows & a sprig in the car for protection.

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Goddesses Mother Earth, Mother Nature, Venus, Aphrodite, Yemaya, Astarte, Freya, Hathor, Ishtar, all Goddesses of love, passion, beauty and the Sea, and Pregnant, lusty Goddesses, Green Forest Mother; Great One of the Stars, Goddess of the Wells Gods Father Sun/Sky, Oak King, Holly King, Arthur, Gods at peak power and strength.

Animals/Mythical Beings Wren, robin, horses, cattle, satyrs, faeries, firebird, dragon, thunderbird Gemstones Lapis lazuli, diamond, tiger’s eye, all green gemstones, especially emerald and jade Herbs Anise, Mugwort, chamomile, rose, wild rose, oak blossoms, lily, cinquefoil, lavender, fennel, elder, mistletoe, hemp, thyme, larkspur, nettle, wisteria, vervain ( verbena), St. John’s wort, heartsease, rue, fern, wormwood, pine,heather, yarrow, oak & holly trees Incense/Oil Heliotrope, saffron, orange, frankincense & myrrh, wisteria, cinnamon, mint, rose, lemon, lavender, sandalwood, pine Rituals/Magicks Nature spirit/fey communion, planet healing, divination, love & protection magicks.

The battle between Oak King, God of the waxing year & Holly King, God of the waning year (can be a ritual play), or act out scenes from the Bard’s (an incarnation of Merlin) "A Midsummer Night’s Dream", rededication of faith, rites of inspiration.

Foods Honey, fresh vegetables, lemons, oranges, summer fruits, summer squash, pumpernickel bread, ale, carrot drinks, mead.

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Awareness For the Month of June June 2011 Health Current Events - Months Awareness Event

Coverage

Related Organization

Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS) Awareness Month

Canada

ALS Society of Canada

Brain Injury Awareness Month

Canada

BIAM

National Spina Bifida and Hydrocephalus Awareness Month

Canada

SBHAC

Stroke Awareness Month

Canada

Heart and Stroke Foundation of Canada

National Cancer Survivors Day

Canada

Canadian Cancer Society

National Osteoporosis Month

United Kingdom

National Osteoporosis Society

National Aphasia Awareness Month

United States

National Aphasia Association

Clean Air Month

United States

American Lung Association

National Scleroderma Awareness Month

United States

Scleroderma Foundation

Myasthenia Gravis United States Awareness Month

MGFA

June 2011 Health Current Events - Weeks

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Event

Date

Nation

Organisation

Down?s Syndrome Awareness Week

2nd Jun - 8th Jun

United Kingdom

Down's Syndrome Association

British Heart Week

7th Jun - 15th Jun

United Kingdom

British Heart Foundation

Bowel Cancer Awareness Week

8th Jun - 14th Jun

Australia

Bowel Cancer Australia

Diabetes Week

13th Jun - 19th Jun

United Kingdom

Diabetes UK

Huntington's Disease Awareness Week

16th Jun - 22nd Jun

United Kingdom

Huntington's Disease Association

National Crohn's & Colitis Awareness Week

16th Jun - 22nd Jun

Australia

Australian Crohn`s and Colitis Association

Helen Keller Deaf-Blind Awareness Week

22nd Jun - 28th Jun

United States

Helen Keller National Center

THIS WEEKDeafblind Awareness Week

27th Jun - 3rd Jul

United Kingdom

Deafblind Awareness Week

June 2011 Health Events - Days Event

Date

Nation

Organization

National Cancer Survivors Day

1st Jun

United States

National Cancer Survivors Day

World Blood Donor Day

14th Jun

Worldwide

World Blood Donor Day

National Bug Busting Day - 2nd of 3

15th Jun

United Kingdom

Community Hygiene Concern

World Sickle Cell Day

19th Jun

Worldwide

Sickle Cell Society

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National HIV Testing Day

27th Jun

United States

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NAPWA

The Caffeinated Cross The following ritual was found in a musty, dusty old fragment of parchment lodged between the musty old pages of a musty, dusty old book in a musty, dusty old library whose musty, dusty old dust hadn't been disturbed by the presence of man in many a musty, dusty old century. It took a great deal of effort to translate the original writings. After months of effort and research in language libraries, it was finally determined that the weird script was not some arcane, forgotten language, but English, written by someone with a very bad case of caffeine jitters.

Another fragment indicated that this was once part of a book, entitled "The Mystery of the StarBuck".

THE CAFFEINATED CROSS Stand, facing east, holding your coffee cup, filled with the mystical brew, in your power hand, and assume a posture of wakeful alertness.

Bring your coffee cup to your forehead and intone: "LATTE" Lower your coffee cup to the vicinity of your navel:

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"MOCHA" Bring your coffee cup to your left shoulder: "CAPPUCHINO" Bring it across to your right shoulder: "FRAPPUCHINO" Clasp your coffee cup in both hands over your heart chakra: "ARABICA, OH MAN!" Extend your arms to the sides, and intone: "BEFORE ME, MRS. OLSON" "BEHIND ME, JUAN VALDEZ" "AT MY RIGHT HAND, M J B" "AT MY LEFT HAND, THE BROTHERS HILLS" "FOR ABOUT ME SWIRLS THE COFFEE AROMA" "WITHIN ME SINGS THE CAFFEINE HIGH" Drink the coffee, in communion with the spirits of the Sacred Coffee Bean. This last step may be usefully repeated as long as you like.

Think before you speak...

Here are six reasons why you should think before you speak the last one is great!

Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back... or that you could crawl into a hole?

Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did....

FIRST TESTIMONY: I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a bl*w j0b?"

I turned around and walked back out and never went back My husband didn't say a word... he knew better.

SECOND TESTIMONY: I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls.

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I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using.

After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store.

He asked if he could help me.

Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with mens balls" THIRD TESTIMONY: My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of candy and nuts.

As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help.

I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts."

My sister started to laugh hysterically.

The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away.

To this day, my sister has never let me forget..

FOURTH TESTIMONY: While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok.

I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons.

I told her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished.

To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening, "If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's willy last night!"

The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange.

Even the tellers stopped what they were doing.

I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow.

The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me, were screams of laughter.

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FIFTH TESTIMONY: Have you ever asked your child a question too many times?

My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him constantly.

One day we stopped at McDonalds for a quick lunch, in between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room.

While enjoying my burger, I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven-month-old daughter, she was clean.

Then I realized that Danny had not asked to go potty in a while.

I asked him if he needed to go, and he said "No".

I kept thinking "Oh Lord, that child has had an accident, and I don't have any clothes with me."

Then I said, "Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?"

"No," he replied.

I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse.

Soooooo, I asked one more time, "Danny did you have an accident ? This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over, spread his cheeks and yelled "SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!"

While 30 people nearly choked to death on their food laughing, he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down.

An old couple made me feel better, thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!

LAST BUT NOT LEAST TESTIMONY: This had most of the state of Michigan in America laughing for 2 days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks.

What happens when you predict snow but don't get any!

We had a female news anchor that, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked: "So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?"

Not only did he have to leave the set,

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but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!

To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity 1.. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice!

3..Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks . Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

5. In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write ' For Marijuana.

6. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get.

7. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

8. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.

9. Sing Along At The Opera.

10. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.

11.When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!' 12. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'

13. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.' And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity 14. PICK UP A BOX OF CONDOMS AT THE PHARMACY, GO TO THE COUNTER AND ASK WHERE THE FITTING ROOM IS.

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Litha Fire IncenseMidsummer is a great time for herb gardens, because there are buds and blooms everywhere. This is a powerful time to gather herbs, and also to prepare and use them.

Any fresh herb can be dried simply by picking it and tying it up in small bundles in a well-ventilated area. Once they are completely dry store them in airtight jars in a dark place.

To make your own magical summer incense, first determine what form you’d like to make. You can make incense with sticks and in cones, but the easiest kind uses loose ingredients, which are then burned on top of a charcoal disc or tossed into a fire.

This recipe is for loose incense, but you can always adapt it for stick or cone recipes.

As you mix and blend your incense, focus on the intent of your work. In this particular recipe, we’re creating an incense to use during a Litha rite -- and since Litha is all about the sun and its strength, we’re going to make this a fiery and powerful incense.

You’ll need: • 3 parts myrrh • 1 part apple blossoms • ½ part bay leaves

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• ½ part cinnamon bark • 1 part chamomile flowers • 1 part lavender flowers • 2 parts mugwort • ½ part rosemary Add your ingredients to your mixing bowl one at a time. Measure carefully, and if the leaves or blossoms need to be crushed, use your mortar and pestle to do so. As you blend the herbs together, state your intent. You may find it helpful to charge your incense with an incantation, such as: Balance of the heavens and earth below, The power of the sun in this incense grows.

Cinnamon, mugwort, apple and bay, Fire and water, on this longest day.

Herbs of power, blended by me, As I will, so it shall be.

Store your incense in a tightly sealed jar. Make sure you label it with its intent and name, as well as the date you created it. Use within three months, so that it remains charged and fresh.

Stone Sundial-

Stonehenge is one of the world's best known stone circles, and many researchers have noted that the structure functions as a giant astronomical calendar and sundial. Most people can't build a Stonehenge replica in their back yard, but what you can do is create a sundial of your own using stones you've found. If you have children, this is a great science project to do, but even if you don't have kids, it's fascinating to create your own sundial. If you can do this around Litha, at Midsummer, you'll have the perfect opportunity to recognize the powerful energy of the sun!

You'll need the following items: • A pole or straight stick • Several large stones

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• A clock or watch to calibrate your sundial • Find a place in your yard that gets sun for most of the day. Although it's ideal to do this in the grass of even a patch of dirt, if all you have is a sidewalk or driveway, then that's fine too. Mount the pole by sticking it into the dirt. If you're making your sundial on a hard surface like concrete, then use a block of clay or a bucket of soil to secure the pole.

• Keep an eye on your clock. At each hour, take note of where the pole's shadow falls, and mark the spot with a stone. If you start this project in the morning, you'll be able to mark most of the daytime spots - if you start later in the day, you may have to come back the next morning to figure out where your morning hours are.

• To tell the time with your sundial, look for the pole's shadow. Where it falls between the stones will give you the time.

Rituals On the Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram

by Tim Maroney The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram is one of the chief rituals of Western Magick. It has been with us at least since the Golden Dawn of the nineteenth century, and it has penetrated into all the many Golden Dawn spin-offs, including Neo-Paganism. Yet there is still no widely available, clear instruction. The directions of the magical orders are mere mnemonics for those who are assumed to have personal instructors. To formulate my personal approach to the ritual, to aid any others who may be considering practicing the LBR, and to satisfy the idle curiosity of any gawking onlookers, I have put together this short discussion of the ritual and its symbolism and performance.

A. Intent of the Ritual The real action of a magick ritual takes place in the mind. Ritual is a form of moving meditation. The effect is also primarily psychological.* The LBR is a tool to facilitate meditation. [*Not all players would agree with this statement. Many would say that the effect of

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the LBR is a fortified and cleansed area on the astral plane, which they think is as real as Hoboken, if not more so. It doesn't really matter in practice.]

The experience of a proper LBR is pleasurable and soothing, yet energizing and empowering. One is made at home in the mystical realm, protected from lurkers and phantasms by strongly imagined wards. This solace from mundane experience is a precondition for more serious works of meditation or ritual, but it can also form a healthy part of the life of the mind by itself.

B. The Ritual I'll just reprint the description of the Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram from Liber O, a publication of the occult order A.'.A.'.

1. Touching the forehead, say "Ateh (Unto Thee)."

2. Touching the breast, say Malkuth (The Kingdom)."

3. Touching the right shoulder, say "ve-Geburah (and the Power)."

4. Touching the left shoulder, say "ve-Gedulah (and the Glory), 5. Clasping the hands upon the breast, say "le-Olahm, Amen (To the Ages, Amen)."

6. Turning to the East, make a pentagram (that of Earth) with the proper weapon (usually the Wand). Say (i.e. vibrate) "IHVH" (Ye-ho-wau*).

7. Turning to the South, the same, but say "ADNI" (Adonai).

8. Turning to the West, the same, but say "AHIH" (Eheieh).

9. Turning to the North, the same, but say "AGLA" (Agla).

10.Extending the arms in the form of a cross say: 11."Before me Raphael; 12.Behind me Gabriel; 13.On my right hand Michael; 14.On my left hand Auriel; 15.For about me flames the Pentagram, 16.And in the Column stands the six-rayed Star."

17.until xxi. Repeat steps (i) to (v), the "Qabalistic Cross." [* Modern scholarship has a different take on the pronunciation of the Big Guy's name. I use "Yahweh" rather than the "Ye-ho-wau" of Liber O because that's what the Catholic priests of my youth taught me to say, and I've never been able to shake it off.

Use whatever pronunciation you prefer, or a different name altogether.]

C. Politics of the Ritual With practice, you will no doubt come up with your own style of performance, and your own different symbolism for ritual acts. Different people do rituals as differently

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as actors play parts, even though the lines and motions may be fundamentally the same. (The alternative is an authoritarian, dogmatic horror which is alien to the deep occult understanding of religion, but is still common in magical groups.) Slavish imitation will get you nowhere in Magick -- except, perhaps, to some high spiritual degree!

The Christianity -- or at least angelic monotheism -- of the ritual symbolism may give a start to some. Many of us involved in occultism have strongly negative feelings about Christianity. These are perhaps justified, but there are a few saving graces here.

First, as with any ritual, you should feel free to make it yours, to mess around with it.

If you don't start to at least play with the styles of a ritual after a while, you are probably not doing it very well. It is perfectly legitimate to substitute cognate symbols at any time. However, the saying in the martial arts is that one first learns another's style, and after mastering it, moves on to create one's own. For a beginner, it will be easiest simply to use an existing ritual form in order to explore the meaning of a banishing ritual.

Given that experience, which transcends any mere set of symbols, one may devise a form more in keeping with the emergence of one's personal style. For instance, Neo-Pagans use a highly reified form of the same basic ritual in many of their traditions, but with non-Christian deities, spirits, and heros at the quarters. Aleister Crowley wrote a new version which made the performance more dancelike, and used the names of Thelemic deities and officers rather than monotheist gods and angels.

My private version, called "Opening the Threshold", is entirely atheistic and philosophical.

In any case, of those people who so abhor Christianity, how many have looked at some of the practices of historical pagans in Europe, Asia, Africa and the Americas? No religion should ever be "accepted" by an occultist. When using any religion's symbolism, the adept should cut to its sacred poetical core and discard the political dross. By this standard, Christianity looks about as good as any other religion.

Without this standard and by factoring in historical excesses and power plays, almost all known religions look just about as bad as Christianity.

In other words, someone who will happily use Norse gods, Arthurian heroes, Taoist immortals, Voudoun loas, or what have you in rituals, but will never touch a Christian angel, is guilty of the same narrowness he or she probably imparts to the Christians.

The Vibration of God-Names In the LBR, the vibration of the god-names "charges" or "enlivens" the pentagrams in the air. This is difficult to describe, but easy to recognize. There is a feeling of presence

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in one of these charged warding images -- though not necessarily a feeling of true externality or separate intelligence. Weare told to "vibrate" the names. The description and illustration of the "vibration" given in Liber O have been known to mislead people into hilarious postures. What the picture most resembles is the skulking monster from the movie The Mummy. To the modern eye, it is remarkable how truly unclear a photograph can be. I didn't learn how to vibrate a god-name until I signed up with yet another occult order and was taught it in person. I wouldn't wish the ensuing experience on anyone, so here is a description which I hope will be adequate in print.

Vibration phase i -- The Sign of the Enterer (1-4) 1. Stand upright. Blow all the air out of your lungs. Hold your arms straight out at your sides.

2a. Close your eyes and inhale nasally, imagining that the breath is the name. The exact nature of this imagination differs from person to person. Thus, you imagine yourself inhaling the name into your lungs.

2b. As you inhale, sweep your forearms smoothly and deliberately up so that your fists rest on your temples.

3. Imagine the breath moving down through your torso slowly, and through your pelvis, your legs, and finally to the soles of your feet. (Don't do this so slowly that you are hurting for air when the name reaches your feet!)

4a. The instant the inhaled vibrational name hits the soles of your feet, imagine it rushing back up and out.

4b. Simultaneously, throw yourself forward, thrusting your left foot forward about twelve inches (or thirty centimeters) and catching yourself on it. Your hands shoot forward, together, like a diver. You bend forward at the waist so that your torso winds up parallel to the floor.

4c. The air in your lungs should be blown out through your nose at the same time, but imagine the name shooting out straight ahead.

Steps 3-4 are known as the Sign of the Enterer, or of Horus. This symbolizes powerful active energy. The Enterer should be something of a "rush". The vibrational name is projected outwards into more tangible manifestation -- in this case, in the pentagrams of the LBR, which are charged by the force of the projected god-names.

It is highly inadvisable to omit the portion of step(4b) which reads "catching yourself on it." But again, I have no desire to infringe on your freedom of choice.

Vibration phase ii -- The Sign of Silence (5) 5. Finally, withdraw into a standing position, left arm hanging at your side, right

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forefinger on lips, left foot pointing ninety degrees out from the body.

Step 5 is called the Sign of Silence, or of Harpocrates. This Egyptian god was mistakenly believed (at the turn of the century) to pertain to silence, because his finger or thumb was touching his lips. This gesture is now believed to be a symbol of childhood; this correction appears in the World card of Crowley's "Book of Thoth" Tarot deck. Harpocrates was the god of the Sun at dawn, and so symbolizes wonder, beauty, potential, growth. So, step 5 may be done in this academically corrected light instead.

However, the "hush" gesture of the Golden Dawn Sign of Silence is adequate for the modern occultist, even if deprived of A Divine Identification. It is a common gesture, at least in the European culture, meaning silence. Silence perhaps balances the ultra-active Sign of the Enterer better than does the more scholarly positive/active "Sign of Harpocrates the Rising Sun", and silence is surely no alien concept to mystics.

The Invocation The pentagrams are given form by the drawing, life by the vibration, identity by the four-part prayer of steps (x) to (xiv). Some people do very elaborate visualizations of angelic guardians on each of (xi) to (xiv). Because of my tragic personal deficiencies, I am content with strong feelings of presence, identity, and divinity in each of the four directions.

A horizontal cross is built up step by step as you say, "Before me Raphael", etc, with you at the center; and the position of your arms forms a vertical cross, a renewal of the Qabalistic Cross from the start of the ritual. You may feel a quite peculiar rising and expansion when both of these crosses are formulated. One has become the center of the geometry of the space, and it is like a little world in itself, cut adrift from the mundane currents of everyday experience.

Steps (xv) and (xvi) are when the real banishing takes place, during "For about me flames the pentagram, and in the column stands the six-rayed star." A great pulse of force is emitted during these steps, imposing the personal will on the space and clearing it of all hostile influences.

After this is done, the invoked "archangels" maintain the banishing effect, guarding in all four directions. Of course this talk of angels is all bullshit -- the importance lies in the psychological effect. Whether there "really is" an archangel standing there keeping out inimical spirits is not important. The "feeling of cleanliness" is what matters.

Concluding Cross The final Quabalistic Cross is an affirmation of the completeness and symmetry of the ritual, and also a new self-consecration. This is more efficacious than the previous

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Cross because it is done in a banished environment.

One is now ready to do a formal invocation, an evocation, a meditation, or whatever the overall purpose may be. The LBR is a preliminary ceremony, although it has a beneficial effect in itself. It can profitably be done as a stand-alone ritual, but you should move on. The LBR should keep away the horrible ickies that turn so many novices away from Magick. Its mastery is a first step to adeptship.

The magical Application for the Hebrew Letters The Hebrew alphabet is just like using the runes to the most degree. Each letter can be used to open doors to an infinite possible things with in the mind.

The Hebrew letters are also considered a manifestation of God & that is where the true significance lays, in brining able to understand them & utilize them fully. For each letter has it’s own characteristics & personifications. Understanding this will help one to see the true function & importance in one self & the application of them in magical work.

Talismanic Attribution of the letters of the Hebrew Alphabet Aleph ·: Spiritual; wings generally, epicene, rather male than female, rather thin type.

Beth · Active & slight male.

Gimel ·: Grey, beautiful yet changeful, rather full face & body.

Daleth ·: Very beautiful & attractive, feminine Rather full face & body.

Heh ·: Fierce strong, rather fiery, feminine.

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Vau ·: Steady & strong, Rather heavy & clumsy, Masculine.

Zayin ·: Thin intelligent, masculine.

Cheth ·: Full face, not much expression, feminine.

Teth ·: Rather strong & fiery, Feminine.

Yod ·: Very white & rather delicate, feminine Kaph ·: Big & strong, Masculine.

Lamed ·: Well proportioned, feminine.

Mem: ·: Reflective, dream like, epicene, but female rather than male.

Nun ·: Square determined face, masculine, rather dark.

Samekh ·: Thin expressive face, masculine Ayin: ·: Rather mechanical, masculine.

Peh ·: Fierce, strong, resolute, feminine.

Tzaddi ·: Thoughtful, intellectual, feminine.

Qoph ·: Rather full face, masculine.

Resh ·: Proud & dominate, masculine.

Shin ·: Fiery, active, epicene, rather male than female.

Tau ·: Dark, grey, epicene, male rather than female. *** these genders are only given as a conventional guide*** It is the

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image that comes to your mind that is important, not what may be written here.

The Lords who Wander For Memory: Saturn · Tau · Lord of the Night Time For construction: Jupiter · Kaph · For Anger, Impatience: Mars · Peh · For vanity: Sun · Resh · For Pleasure: Venus · Daleth · For Imagination: Mercury · Beth · For wandering thoughts: Moon · Nun ·

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Welcome to the Meditation Room.

This is where you will begin your journey into a new level of relaxation and awareness. Each meditation serves a specific purpose, depending on what you want to achieve. Choose freely and feel free to perform more than one meditation. Here are some hints to get you started: Make sure you are in a quiet room with no distractions.

Allow some time for your meditation. These meditations last from 3 - 10 minutes. The duration of each meditation is listed below so you can plan your time accordingly.

As you listen to the words of the meditation, picture the images that are being described in your mind.

Be open to the meditation.

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Relaxation Through Meditation My preference would be to call meditation relaxation – conscious relaxation, chosen relaxation. These are words that are more universally understood, more comfortable. Constantly working toward the goal of discovering my own ability to reach a state of serenity, I have learned to meditate.

Meditating is actually easier than you might imagine. Most of us have dabbled in meditation by participating in conscious relaxation. Maybe during an exercise class or to manage pain at the dentist or anxiety before a test. We start by paying attention to our breathing. The practical effort to focus completely on our breathing takes our minds away from the "mind clutter" that constantly tries to invade our mind and eliminate feelings that will lead to a time of calm. With repeated effort the goal of clearing your mind – to think of nothing, does occur and the process of meditation takes on its own energy.

The result is, and I guarantee this, peace, serenity, calmness, eventually opening yourself to new insights.

Meditating for Life Too much stress, stress reduction, chill out, let it go, detach – familiar phrases to all of us. Our world is fast, fun and exciting. It is also challenging, trying, demanding and frightening. These two sides of our lives produce stress, emotional reactions, anxiety, worry and anticipation. Our bodies and minds can tolerate only so much of any of these. After a while, each of us reaches a saturation point and the results become uncomfortable at best; for some it may be unbearable, even unendurable.

No magic pill is available to eliminate these feelings. The reality is, as the wise old man said, the answer is inside all of us. To manage these universal concerns we must go inside ourselves. Among the steps we can take is the learning and practicing of meditation.

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What to Expect With time and faith in the commitment to practice frequently, (daily meditating is ideal), during your meditation time you may "leave the moment." A feeling of separation exists where the mind is clear, clean and blank. You will still hear sounds around you, but they will not interfere with your meditation.

Sometimes you may weep -- you may not even be aware of what is making you weep. It is your own emotions having a voice of their own. Sometimes you may feel a smile across your face -- that is contentment showing itself.

Sometimes you may fall asleep and awaken truly refreshed.

There is no right or wrong behavior during your meditation. It is your time for you. Everyone deserves this kind of personal attention. This is a self-care activity; loving oneself! Teach it to your children instead of a time-out in their room or corner. Teach it to your friends, family, anyone who will listen. We can share this gift and get back as we give. We are all better because of each person who meditates. The peace and joy felt by those who meditate enters the world for all of us as positive energy. From it the world is a better place.

Imagine if we all practiced meditation!

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Being An Empath Is Human By Persephone I am often asked what it means to be an empath. There are many ways to answer this but the one that makes most sense to people is a simple statement.

“I feel things”. Granted it’s vague but it is also accurate.

An empath is a “feeler”. Many use the term psychic in defining an empath; I personally believe it to be a human trait versus a psychic ability. It is hard to have compassion or even a connection to another human being without some level of empathy. Do you have the ability of feeling something when you attempt to put yourself in another person’s shoes?

I am an emotional and physical empath. I did not train to do these things I wasn’t born under a lucky or even a cursed star to come into this world like this; I am simply a human being who is tuned into what is going on in my own body. The human brain has certain parts which on the whole are connected to unseen dimensional areas, which connect to everything else in the universe (something to do with quantum string theory) androgens act on the primitive and oldest part of the brain (sexual and emotional) this increases and fine tunes psychic abilities (ESP PK Clairvoyance etc.) Now to get even more complex here is food for thought but try to break down the meaning so you have a better understanding of why one is Empath. Nobody really knows

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how consciousness works, but there's a theory that there's a quantum mechanical process which links many synapses of the brain into a "state vector". In quantum mechanics, a state vector is considered to be the collection of all the states representing solutions to one basic equation which expresses the same complete set of boundary conditions. It's theoretically possible for the neo-cortex to process 1,000,000,000 connections per second — which makes the brain powerful enough to create state vectors, whew a lot right.

While you have probably heard of the science of pheromones and the role they play in the attraction of individuals to one another, there is a deeper and more scientific explanation to this process; and it involves an actual physical structure of your own body.

Known as the VNO, the vomeronasal organ, researchers believe it is this small part of our body that may be the underlying component responsible for explaining why opposites attract and why, in some cases, couples lose, and then regain, romance in their relationships.

The VNO is a sensory organ within the nose that detects and processes pheromones, resulting in the opening of the sixth sense gateway to our brains. While this helps us to understand the relationship aspect it also shows us why we are all empathic, it is that Sixth Sense.

Once these physiological changes occur, individuals who experience a stimulation of the VNO also experience a change in brain and thought processes in the region believed to house the sixth sense. This region of the brain, responsible for interpreting sensory cues, is quickly stimulated, often well before our logical part of the brain is unleashed.

Let’s begin by looking at how empathy works. Empathy is the exchange of energy from one living being to another, pheromones in other words. Have

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you ever walked into a room feeling just fine and within minutes without any clear reason suddenly felt drained, sick, tired or angry? You are feeling the energy of the people around you and then absorbing it into your own body and psyche.

Empathy is simply the ability to feel what others are feeling. Empath’s absorb these feelings and if they don’t know, what they are experiencing can often confuse the feelings of others for their own. This can have some serious effects on the well-being of the empath.

As someone who is born into this world with a high sensitivity for others; it feels normal to feel lousy or happy or even wary. Many are labeled and misdiagnosed repeatedly and yet, it seems no matter what they do they don’t get much better and some even continue to get worse.

Get yourself a notebook and keep a log for one week. In that log, you should list anything you feel both physically and emotionally through each day. How did you feel when you left the house? What about while you stood in line for coffee? Were you in a good mood when you got to the office? Did it change when certain people were near? Did you experience any physical discomfort?

When? Where? Who was around?

After a week go back through and see if you find any common themes between feelings, surroundings and people. Often you may find that each time Mary walks by your desk your feet suddenly hurt or when you see Bob at the coffee shop, you suddenly feel a burst of irritation. Of course, empathy is not always a bad feel and when Joe comes by your mood often elevates. You do feel the good as well as the bad.

While it may seem like a curse, it really isn’t one. You can control how much you take on and yes, you can even get rid of what doesn’t belong to you. Your first step in doing this is becoming aware of how much you are taking on from

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others and then recognize that you do not have to continue to hold onto the energy of others. Empathy has some beneficial uses that can help you in your everyday life as empathy gives you a “feel� for other people. If you can feel them then you can determine how best to deal with them.

I personally know how to shield and do so when needed, there are strong residual emotions in places that I can feel therefore prefer not to, yet I also have the ability to see the fylgia or to better understand impending death of people. This happens upon occasion and without fail the person shall pass within the time I originally sensed it, my sixth sense was always there and I have learned to understand and embrace this human part of who I am.

Empathy is not a gift that would mean we are special compared to others, I cannot put myself above others this seems wrong, it is a very natural human ability, many recognize it others do not but we ALL have it.

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Published in the January 2003 Issue of "The Chronicles Of Power"

Since Darkness Against Child Abuse is an organization that is primarily supported by Pagans and Satanists, I feel inclined to address the sensationalism of the subject Occult Ritual Abuse. Most people will read articles written from the Christian view of this subject where Christians speak of biblical conspiracies between Satan and his fallen angels to take our innocent children to hell in a hand basket or some similar ridiculous idea. Christians are under the impression that Wiccans are Satanists, that the Church of Satan conjures up demons and kisses Satan's rear while signing their names in his “book of blood” and pretty much perpetuate the hysteria of the Witch trials when they speak on the subject of ORA. This article is written by an Occultist who has down to earth views on religion, an educated insight of most occult religions and nothing to lose by telling the absolute truth without the Christian bias and intentional misleading that the Church has filled this subject with in the past. First, I will discuss the most popular of Occult religions. The most popular Pagan religion is Wicca.

Wiccans generally believe in a God and Goddess. They do not believe in Satan or any devil. Wicca is an Earth based magickal religion. This religion is generally gentle and has one primary rule called the “Wiccan Rede”. The rede states, “If it harm none, do as thou will”. Wiccans have an almost “hippie” like quality of peace and love. It is highly unlikely that any Wiccan would abuse a child and no prominent Wiccan organization would condone ritual abuse of a child. The next most popular Occult religion is Satanism. This is a highly misunderstood

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religion to those who are not occultists. The majority of Satanists follow the teachings of Anton LaVey in one form or another. LaVey started the Church of Satan in 1966 and wrote the “Satanic Bible” shortly after. LaVey did not truly believe in Satan as a deity, his version of Satan was the fulfillment of man's primal desires. He called his religion “Satanism” as a show of his distaste of the general political correctness of society. He felt that the Christian religion was full of hypocrites and he attempted to take a jab at them through his teachings.

Although LaVey felt that man should ultimately please himself no matter the cost, he did not condone the violation of the established laws of the country or state. In fact, the Church of Satan expels members who are known criminals or who support violation of the law. The Church of Satan does not condone the abuse of children in any way, shape, or form. I know that this is contrary to what you may have read in some Christian publication or during the sermon this past Sunday. It is, however, the truth. Satanists do not sacrifice humans or animals.

The belief that they do is only popular because of movies, novels, and Christian bias and misunderstanding. Anyone who is arrested on child abuse charges and claims to be a “witch” or “satanist” and abused the child for religious reasons, is a lunatic who was only one step away from claiming that “Jesus said to do it”.

There is actually more evidence and fact to support Christian abuse of children than Satanic or “Witchcraft” abuse of children. It actually is a fact that most of all religious abuse of children is Christian abuse. Take the recent charges against the Catholic clergy. There has never been such a widespread and scandalous claim against any established Occult religion. Never have you heard of the Church of Satan molesting it's children or any Wiccan organization being under federal investigation for child abuse. Yet, here is an entire Christian faith under investigation for statutory rape, sexual assault, and child molestation. The question remains now, why are there so many claims of Occult Ritual or Satanic abuse? Part of the answer is that there are in fact some legitimate cases of Ritual Abuse (a systematic cycle of abuse) and Occult Ritual Abuse (take the case against Russell Smith for example). There is always a sick person somewhere who gets the idea that they will benefit from the harm of a child. There is also always someone who misunderstands what it means to be a Witch or Satanist. Just in the same way that there is someone who misunderstands what it is to be a Christian. Another part is that there is so much Christian bias towards Occult

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religions. Ever notice how most allegations of Occult Ritual or Satanic abuse come from Christians? The truth is that most allegations of Occult or Satanic abuse are false. Yet Christians always sensationalize them. Even if the claims are false, there is always a sermon, book deal, movie deal, or news story that follows and the fact that there was nothing to the allegation is forgotten somewhere along the way. Yet another part are those who simply lie about their experiences in the Occult. I read a book a few years ago (I forgot the title by now but I think it was called breaking the chains of Satan or some similar thing) where someone claimed to be a “Wiccan High Priest” and described how he lead so many souls into the hands of Satan. He described sexual orgies, animal sacrifices, and many other things that simply do not happen in Wiccan ceremonies. Amazingly enough, this guy found Jesus and is now the Reverend of some southern church.

The truth is, Wiccans see nature as sacred. Many Wiccans are animal rights activists who would NEVER harm an animal much less kill one. As I read the book, it was painfully obvious that this guy was making it ALL up. Yes, I am calling a Christian minister a liar. I have been Pagan for over 17 years and have been to many Wiccan events. I have yet to see “orgies” at any of them. Yes, there was sexual activity among consenting adults, but nothing that could even be close to an “orgy”. The next big liar I am going to mention here is a guy by the name of Mike Warnke. He published a book called the “Satan Seller” in 1972.

In this book Mike claims to have been a High Priest of the Church of Satan in 1965 and 1966. First and foremost, the Church of Satan was founded in 1966.

So, how this guy was a “High Priest” in 1965 is beyond me. He also claims that he planned Satanic conspiracies with Charles Manson in that time. Well, Charles Manson may be a sick person but he is NOT a Satanist and was actually in prison at the time that Mike says he met with him in his book. Mike fails to provide any accurate information at all in his book but he has maintained a very public ministry and sells himself to the Christian public as a “reformed Satanist”.

Another book that contributed to the misconceptions of Satanic and Occult ritual abuse is a book called “Michelle Remembers”. This book was published in the early 1980's and supposedly outlines a girl's abuse at the hands of a Satanic Cult. She speaks of sexual abuse, Satanic conspiracies, and many other interesting topics. However, amazingly enough none of the things described in this book have ever been substantiated. No evidence of the occurences in the

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book exist. No criminal charges, no arrest, no proof. In fact, many people, including Christians have examined the claims of this book and found the stories in it to be untrue. Another reason such stories are believed is the evidence collected when someone recalls a “hidden memory”. Many books were published when victims of occult or Satanic abuse started to have “memories” of abuse in their childhood. These memories were supposedly “hidden” by their conscious mind to protect the person from the awful things that happened. Later in their adult life these “memories” were discovered while under the care of a psychologist or psychiatrist. The problem is that one such case went to court and it was discovered that the doctor actually planted the memories while his patient was under hypnosis. Such evidence is now questionable as legitimate evidence in criminal cases. Many are willing to believe such things because, let's face the fact that the American society is largely Christian. Such stories fit within the Christian view of non-Christian religions. It is almost as though Christians expect this type of behavior from others. You also have Christian ministers who want to boost their popularity and manufacture false occult backgrounds so that they are seen as “experts” in the field of the Occult. They then share their story of “finding Jesus” and everyone in their congregation breaks into tears of love and are in awe of Jesus' power to turn people away from “Satan”. I am also willing to bet that such stories produce many dollars for the collection plate at the end of the sermon. It seems that these type of people do not stop to think of what kind of impact such things have on a child. Manufactured “memories”, dishonest clergy, and false allegations of child abuse can be devastating to a child.

Should we stop to think of what name to give this type of abuse? These things are more common than actual Occult or Satanic abuse. They are probably just as devastating as the actual act of physical abuse. ~Shadow Villanueva~ Founder- Darkness Against Child Abuse Article used with permission from http://www.magickalshadow.com/daca/index2.html (Darkness Against Child Abuse)

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9 Noble Virtues Posted by Gossamer Wings Nine Noble Virtues (Written by Lewis Stead from the Raven Kindred's ritual book) The Odinic Rite lists the 9 Noble Virtues as Courage, Truth, Honor, Fidelity, Discipline, Hospitality, Industriousness, Self-Reliance, and Perseverance.

It would be hard to get much argument on any of these values from anyone.

They simply and briefly encapsulate the broad wisdom of our Gods and ancestors.

Courage In virtually every statement of values applied to Asatru, Courage is listed first. As Stephen McNallen has said, courage and bravery are perhaps the values which the Vikings are best known for. However, despite our history, few of us face such turmoil as a literal battle for ones life. In fact, I believe it might be easier to manifest courage in such a situation than to do so in the many smaller day to day occurrences in which courage is called for.

The most common of these occurrences for modern Pagans, is the courage to acknowledge and live ones beliefs. It is also, sadly, the one that we most often fail at. While we may often be full of the type of courage that would lead us to face a shield wall, many of us quake at the thought of the topic of religion coming up at the office or a friend asking what church we attend. We won't offer easy answers, but we ask this: if you toast the courage of your ancestors to fight and die for what they believed in, can you trade away your religious identity for a higher salary or social acceptance?

In an essay on values there is also the question of moral courage. The way of Tyr is difficult to lose ones hand for ones beliefs but, Tyr thought the price worth paying. In a million ways modern society challenges our values, not just

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as Asatruar who are estranged from mainstream religious practice, but for religious people in an increasingly not just secular, but anti-religious culture. Values are also not in favor in modern society. Breaking or getting around the rules is encouraged to get ahead. Living honorably is simply too inconvenient. I think most people, Asatru or otherwise, find this repugnant, but the only way to change it is to have the courage to refuse to take part in it.

Truth The second virtue, that of Truth, is the one that most led our kindred to embrace the Odinic Rite's statement of values as our own. Early in our discussions, we decided that no matter what values we chose to hold out as our own, truth must be among them. It is a word that holds so much in its definition, and includes such a wide variety of moral and philosophical beliefs that we were all drawn to it as a simple statement of what we stood for.

At least one of the reasons we wanted to adopt it was the simple issue of honesty. As Bill Dwinnels said at a recent sumbel while toasting truth and honesty: if you don't want people to know about something, don't do it. Truth, in the sense of honesty, is essential to personal honor and also to any system or morality that is not based on rigid legalism. If one is to uphold an honor code, one must be brutally honest with oneself and with others.

Truth is also the Truth that comes with a capital Tthe kind of Truth that one talks about in terms of religion or morality. It's common to talk of different peoples having different "truths," but it's equally important to remember that while we acknowledge that each person or people has their own belief as to what Truth is or where to find it, there finally is a single Truth. This is not the Truth as we believe it, but ultimate Truth. While we may respect other people's truths and seek our own, we must never forget our search for The Truth. Like the Holy Grail of Christian legend, it may never be ours to reach, but when we cease to search we perish.

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Honor Honor is the basis for the entire Asatru moral rationale. If anything comes out in the Eddas and Sagas it is that without honor we are nothing. We remember two types of peoples from ancient times: those whose honor was so clean that they shine as examples to us and those who were so without honor that their names are cursed a thousand years after they lived. Good Asatruar should always strive to be among the former.

However, honor is not mere reputation. Honor is an internal force whose outward manifestation is reputation. Internal honor is the sacred moral compass that each Asatruar and God should hold dear. It is the inner dwelling at peace which comes from living in accordance with ones beliefs and with ones knowledge of the Truth of what one is doing. It is something deeply personal and heartfelt, almost akin to an emotion. It's a knowing that what one is doing is right and decent and correct.

In many ways while the most important of all the virtues it is also the most ephemeral in terms of description. It is all the other virtues rolled together and then still more. The best way I have found to describe honor is that if you are truly living with honor, you will have no regrets about what you have done with your life.

Fidelity Fidelity is a word that is far too often defined by it's narrow use in terms of marital fidelity. By the dictionary it simply means being faithful to someone or something. In marriage this means being true to ones vows and partner, and this has been narrowly defined as limiting ones sexual experience to ones spouse. While I have found this to be great practical advice, many treat fidelity as if there were no other ways in which one could be faithful or unfaithful.

For we Asatruar fidelity is most important in terms of our faith and troth to

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the Gods. We must remain true to the Aesir and Vanir and to our kinsmen. Like marriage, Profession (the rite in which one enters the Asatru faith, similar to Christian confirmation or Wiccan initiation) is a sacred bond between two parties; in this case an Asatruar and the Gods. In order for such a relationship to work, both must be honest and faithful to each other.

Asatru, although currently being reborn, is at its roots a folk religion and we also uphold the value of fidelity to the ways of our ancestors. This is why historical research is so important to the Asatru-folk: it is the rediscovering of our ancient ways and our readoption of them.

Discipline In any discussion of the values of Asatru, discipline is best described as self-discipline. It is the exercise of personal will that upholds honor and the other virtues and translates impulse into action. If one is to be able to reject moral legalism for a system of internal honor, one must be willing to exercise the self-discipline necessary to make it work. Going back to my earlier criticism of society, if one rejects legalism, one must be willing to control ones own actions. Without self-discipline, we have the mess we currently see in our culture.

Looking at discipline in terms of fidelity, we see a close connection. Many Pagans go from faith to faith, system to system, path to path. Asatruar are much less likely to do this. The discipline of keeping faith with our Gods and the ways of our ancestors is part of our modern practice. In this way, we limit ourselves in some ways, but we gain much more in others.

Hospitality Hospitality is simply one of the strongest core values at the heart of virtually every ancient human civilization. In a community/folk religion such as our own, it is the virtue that upholds our social fabric. In ancient times it was essential that when a traveler went into the world he could find some sort of shelter and welcome for the night. In modern times it is just as essential that a traveler find friendship and safety.

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In our modern Asatru community, we need to treat each other with respect and act together for the good of our community as a whole. This functions most solidly on the level of the kindred or hearth where nonfamilial members become extremely close and look out for each other. It can mean hospitality in the old sense of taking in people, which we've done, but in modern times it's more likely to mean loaning someone a car or a bit of money when they need it (that's need, not want).

Part of hospitality is treating other people with respect and dignity. Many of our Gods are known to wander the world and stop in at people's houses, testing their hospitality and generosity. The virtue of hospitality means seeing people as if they were all individuals with self-respect and importance. Or perhaps from time to time, they are literally the Gods in human form. This has profound implications for social action in our religion. Our response to societal problems such as poverty (that's poverty folks, not laziness) is in many ways our modern reaction to this ancient virtue.

In terms of our modern community as a whole, I see hospitality in terms of frontier "barn raisings" where a whole community would come together and pool their resources. This doesn't mean we have to forget differences, but we must put them aside for those who are of our Folk, and work for our common good.

Industriousness Modern Asatruar must be industrious in their actions. We need to work hard if we are going to achieve our goals. There is so much for us to do. We've set ourselves the task of restoring Asatru to it's former place as a mainstream faith and by doing so reinvigorating our society and culture. We can't do this by sitting on our virtues, we need to make them an active part of our behavior.

Industry also refers to simple hard work in our daily vocations, done with care and pride.

Here's a few concrete examples. If you are reading this and don't have a

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kindred, why not? Stop reading now. Go and place ads in the appropriate local stores, get your name on the Ring of Troth, Wyrd Network, or Asatru Alliance networking lists, and with other Pagan groups. Put on a workshop. Ok, now you're back to reading and you don't agree with what I'm saying here? Well, be industrious! Write your own articles and arguments. Write a letter to the editor and suggest this material be banned better that than passivity. Get the blood moving and go out and do it. That's how it gets done. The Gods do not favor the lazy.

The same holds true for our non-religious lives. As Asatruar we should offer a good example as industrious people who add to whatever we're involved in rather than take from it. We should be the ones the business we work in can't do without and the ones who always seem to be able to get things done. When people think of Asatru, they should think of people who are competent and who offer something to the world.

This doesn't just apply to vocational work, but to the entire way we live our lives. It is just as much a mentality. The Vikings were vital people. They lived each day to its fullest and didn't wring their hands in doubt or hesitation. We should put the same attitude forward in all that we do whether it is our usual vocation, devotion to the Gods, or leisure time.

Self Reliance Industry brings us directly to the virtue of Self-Reliance, which is important both in practical and traditional terms. Going back to the general notion of this article, we are dealing with a form of morality that is largely selfimposed and thus requires self-reliance. We rely on ourselves to administer our own morality.

Traditionally, our folkways have always honored the ability of a man or woman to make their own way in the world and not to lean on others for their physical needs. This is one of the ways in which several virtues reinforce and support each other. Hospitality cannot function if people are not responsible enough to

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exercise discipline and take care of themselves. It's for those that strive and fail or need assistance that hospitality is intended, not for the idle who simply won't take care of themselves.

In terms of our relationships with the Gods, self-reliance is also very important. If we wish the Gods to offer us their blessings and gifts, we must make ourselves worthy of themand the Gods are most pleased with someone who stands on their own two feet. This is one of the reasons for the Asatru rule that we do not kneel to the Gods during our ceremonies. By standing we acknowledge our relationship as striving and fulfilled people looking for comradeship and a relationship, rather than acting as scraelings looking for a handout from on high. It takes very little for a God to attract a follower, if worship simply means getting on the gravy train. We, as Asatruar, are people who can make our own way in the world, but who choose to seek a relationship with the Gods.

In mundane terms being self-reliant is a simple way to allow ourselves the ability to live as we wish to. In simple economic terms, if one has enough money in the bank one doesn't need to worry as much about being fired due to religious discrimination. We can look a bigot in the face and tell him just where he can put it. It's also nice to have something in the bank to lay down as a retainer on a good lawyer so we can take appropriate action.

On the other side of this is self-reliance in the sense of Henry David Thoreau, who advocated a simple lifestyle that freed one from the temptations of materialism. Again, here we are able to live as we wish with those things that are truly important. Religious people from all faiths have found that adjusting ones material desires to match one's ability to meet them leaves one open for a closer relationship with deity and a more fulfilling life. While our ancestors were great collectors of gold goodies, they didn't lust for possessions in and of themselves, but for what they stood for and could do for them. In fact, the greatest thing that could be said of a Lord was that he was a good Ring Giver.

Being self-reliant also means taking responsibility for ones life. It's not

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just about refusing a welfare check or not lobbying for a tax exemption, but also refusing to blame ones failures on religious intolerance, the patriarchy, or an unfair system. The system may, in fact, be unfair, but it's our own responsibility to deal with it.

In societal terms, we have become much too dependent on other people for our own good. As individuals we look to the government or to others to solve our problems and as a society we borrow billions from our descendants to pay for today's excesses. Most problems in this world could be solved if people just paid their own way as they went.

The final virtue is Perseverance which I think most appropriate because it is the one that we most need to keep in mind in our living of the other values.

Our religion teaches us that the world is an imperfect place, and nothing comes easy. We need to continue to seek after that which we desire. In this imperfect world there are no free lunches or easy accomplishments especially in the subjects we have set before ourselves. If we truly wish to build an Asatru community that people will hold up as an example of what committed people can do, then we must persevere through the hardships that building our religion is going to entail. We must be willing to continue on when we are pushed back. If one loses a job for ones religion, the answer is not to go back and hide, but to continue until one finds a vocation where one can more forward and live as an Asatruar should.

Finally we must persevere when we simply fail. If one's kindred falls apart because of internal strife, one should go back and start over. Pick up the pieces and continue on. If nobody had done this after the disintegration of the Asatru Free Assembly, this would probably never have been written. We must be willing to continue in the hard work of making our religion strong not just when it is convenient and easy to do so, but when it gets hard, inconvenient, or just plain boring. To accomplish without striving is to do little, but to persevere and finally accomplish a hard fought goal brings great honor.

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How to Make Your Own Apothecary Posted by Gossamer Wings As a little girl I mixed up shampoos and lotions in my laboratory, trying to improve on the toiletries we had. I never came up with anything worth mentioning, but I did once get scolded for spilling my mom's shampoo all over the bathroom rug.

Similarly, a friend of mine recently showed me a home video in which she and her friend at twelve years old gave her mother/videographer a tour of their "laboratory" in which they'd created, among other things, the cure for AIDS. A home apothecary sadly won't accomplish that, but it will allow you to indulge the youthful urge so many of us have to create something useful out of ordinary ingredients.

First I'll outline the ingredients that'll kick off your apothecary. With these, you can create herbal teas, salves, tinctures, syrups, aromatherapy mists,

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eye pillows and infused oils. Then I'll wrap up this post with a simple starter recipe.

10 Great Starter Herbs and Their Properties You can find these herbs online or in stores that have large bulk herb selections. If you have herbs growing in your garden, you can use them fresh instead of dried, but you'll want to double the amount since dried herbs are more concentrated than fresh ones.

• Lavender — has antiseptic and anti-inflammatory properties, If you're planning to use herbs medicinally, do your research! We're not doctors, and this isn't medical advice. thought to work as an insect repellent, can aid with headaches, sleep and relaxation • Peppermint — is a digestive aid, thought to aid in fever reduction • Spearmint — aids in digestion, reduces bloating, contains high amounts of antioxidant, invigorating • Milk Thistle — thought to promote liver and gallbladder function, reported to detoxify and lower cholesterol • Elderberries — has shown great success in treatment of influenza • Fennel — long used as an aid to digestion and bloating, thought to have diuretic properties, improve milk supply in breastfeeding mothers, repel fleas; long used in India to soothe coughs • Rosemary — used to improve memory, circulation, and act as an anti-carcinogen • Chamomile — used as an aid for digestion, colds, and sleep • Nettle — high in protein, iron and vitamins • Ginger — Proven to be useful against nausea, diarrhea, and arthritis, thought to aid in digestion So, oils. We need those, too: 10 Great Starter Essential Oils Most essential oils aren't cheap, but a little goes a long way. You can find them in health and hippie stores the world over, or online. I bought a starter set from Amazon years ago. [Here are some options - Cat] • Grapefruit — used as an energizer, thought to brighten dull skin and

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hair, dilute toxic build up, and resolve water retention • Lemon — antibacterial, an astringent, thought to detoxify, energize and brighten dull skin • Orange — antibacterial; thought to act as an anti-inflammatory, diuretic, aphrodisiac, boost immunity and detoxify • Clary Sage — thought to be useful as a mild antidepressant, astringent, aphrodisiac, sedative, and digestive aid • Rosemary — antibacterial, thought to stimulate hair growth and mental activity, be useful with respiratory problems and reduce pain • Lavender — has antiseptic and anti-inflammatory properties, used to calm anxiety, promote circulation and good respiration • Peppermint — helps with indigestion and nausea, thought to aid with respiratory problems and headaches • Spearmint — antiseptic, repels insects, thought to act as a restorative and a stimulant • Eucalyptus — antiseptic, anti-inflammatory, a decongestant and a stimulant • Tea Tree — antibacterial/microbial/viral, an insecticide and stimulant, thought to help with healing wounds, pain relief and detoxification 10 Great Carriers and Accessories These are all fairly inexpensive and easy to find.

• Vodka (for tinctures and aromatherapy mists) • Olive or Jojoba Oil (for salves and moisturizers) • Tea ball, reusable tea bags or disposable tea bags (for herbal teas and syrups) • Sugar (for syrups) • Beeswax (for salves and balms) • Rice or Beans (for eye and muscle pillows) • Strainer and/or Cheesecloth (to strain various concoctions) • Unscented Castille Soap (for shampoos and cleansers) • Old Fabric (for eye and muscle pillows and sachets) • Jars, tubs and bottles (to store your finished products) While it's by no means necessary, I highly recommend designating a

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centralized spot for storing all these ingredients. Why? 1. It makes you feel like a wizard capable of making magical creations.

2. It just looks cool.

3. It makes it easier to whip things up without having to go searching for everything you need. I used a film drawer my librarian friend gave me that we mounted on the wall in the bathroom.

Now, to get started actually making things: here's a super simple recipe for a relaxing mist for your self and your linens (and your car and your friends and your dog and…)

Lavender Mint Linen and Body Mist Ingredients • 1 part vodka • 1 part water • 10 drops lavender essential oil • 10 drops spearmint essential oil Mix the water and vodka in a pump spray bottle or atomizer, add the essential oils, and shake thoroughly. You'll want to shake this each time before you spray it to ensure it's all nice and mixed up.

If you're looking for more information, I supplemented the knowledge from this first and subsequent workshops at the Herb Farm with two fabulous books, Make Your Place by Raleigh Briggs and Savoring the Day: Recipes And Remedies To Enhance Your Natural Rhythms by Judith Benn Hurley.

These give great overviews on helpful herbs and recipes for a multitude of concoctions.

Good luck and happy mixing!

Magick Herb and Food Glossary Posted by Gossamer Wings The following list will help you create your own magick meals to help enliven your life.

Foods

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Alfalfa Prosperity Apple Fertility and the pentacle Apple pie Healing and love Apricot Love and fertility Artichoke Growth and protection Asparagus Lust and fertility Banana Fertility, love, and prosperity Barley Fertility, healing, and love Beans Grounding, love, and prosperity Beef Grounding, strength, and protection Blueberries Protection and peace Bread Kinship and sustenance Broccoli Leadership and protection Brownies Love Butter Smoothing relationships and spirituality Cabbage Luck, prosperity, and protection Cakes Celebrations and hospitality Carob Prosperity and love Carrots Fertility, luck, and lust Celery Psychic development, weight loss, peace Cheese Healing, joy, and grounding Chicken Grounding and healing Chocolate Prosperity and love Cookies Nurturing and love Corn Luck, prosperity, and spirituality Crab Lust and protection Cucumber Fertility, chastity, and healing Eggplant Prosperity and spirituality Fig Prosperity and strength Fish Love, lust, and psychic development Grapefruit Purification, healing, and weight loss Gingerbread Love and prosperity Grapes Fertility and psychic development Green peppers Prosperity and growth

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Honey Healing, love, and purification Lamb Sensitivity and kindness Leeks Love, protection, and strength Lemon Friendship, love, and happiness Lettuce Prosperity, chastity, and relaxation Mango Love and protection Maple syrup Prosperity and love Melon Healing and purification Milk Goddess energy, love, and nurturing Mushrooms Psychic awareness Noodles Longevity Nuts Fertility, love, and prosperity Oats Prosperity Olives Fertility, love, and healing Onion Fertility, love, and protection Orange Fidelity, healing, and love Passion fruit Love and kinship Pea Love and prosperity Peach Happiness, fertility, and love Pear Love, prosperity, and luck Pickles Weight loss Pineapple Healing, love, and prosperity Plum Love and protection Pomegranate Fertility, prosperity, and luck Potato Compassion, protection, and grounding Pumpkin Healing and prosperity Radish Lust and protection Raisin Psychic energy and sun energy Raspberry Childbirth, happiness, and love Red peppers Energy and strength Rice Fertility, protection, and lust Soy Protection and psychic awareness Spinach Prosperity Squash Spirituality

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Strawberries Love, romance, and lust Sunflower Protection and success Sweet Potato Love, lust, and protection Tea Healing, restfulness, and strength Tofu Protection, psychic development, and spirituality Tomato Healing, love, and prosperity Tortilla Protection and spirituality Vanilla Love and lust Vinegar Healing, protection, and purification Water Purification Watermelon Healing and fertility Yeast Grounding and purification Yogurt Healing and spirituality Cooking Herbs and Spices Allspice Love, prosperity, and healing Basil Love, psychic development, and protection Bay Prosperity, psychic development, and protection Black Pepper Cleansing and protection Caraway Healing, love, and protection Cardamom Love, lust, and strength Celery Seed Grounding, psychic development, and lust Cinnamon Healing, love, and lust Cloves Courage, money, and protection Coriander Healing, love, and lust Cumin Protection, fidelity, and happiness Curry Protection Dill Love, lust, and psychic development Fennel Healing, protection, and strength Garlic Healing, purification, and protection Ginger Cleansing, healing, and love Horseradish Protection and purification Licorice Fidelity, love, and lust Marjoram Cleansing, healing, and protection

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Mint Communication, love, and prosperity Mustard Seeds Courage, fertility, and psychic development Nutmeg Confidence, fidelity, and healing Oregano Healing, joy, and peace Parsley Luck, lust, and prosperity Peppermint Healing, love, and lust Poppy Seeds Prosperity, fertility, and abundance Rosemary Cleansing, healing, and psychic development Saffron Abundance, healing, and love Sage Cleansing, healing, and psychic development Salt Protection, cleansing, and purification Sesame Seed Fertility, love, and prosperity Sugar Love Thyme Healing, love, and psychic development Turmeric Purification Vanilla Love, lust, and psychic development

71 Home Remedies That Work as Good as Medicine Posted by Gossamer Wings The main goal of a healthy lifestyle is to get good health and remain illness free to be able to enjoy life to the fullest. However there are times when you still get sick. So to be able to regain that healthy lifestyle a quick recovery is a must. For quite some time we have relied on buying medicine from drugstores to make our illness go away. But there are 71 typical household items that can get the job done as well as any medicine.

One advantage of household remedies is there are fewer threatening side effects. Most of the remedies are natural so they pose little threat if they go wrong. It is also very convenient as there is no need to leave the house to purchase medicine. What if you’re too sick to go out? And the final advantage of home remedies is they are relatively inexpensive.

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The following are things that are more than meets the eye.

1. Apple Cider Vinegar: Hippocrates is widely known to have used apple cider vinegar to treat his patients. And you can’t blame him because it does relieve body aches, lack of energy, and warts. Nowadays even veterinarians use it as treatment for our beloved pets.

2. Club Soda: A first aid remedy for an upset stomach is to drink a can of soda. Pop the can open and leave it for 15 minutes before drinking. This will help settle down your stomach. As a plus, club soda is great with removing stains too.

3. Chocolate Milk: People who workout know that by drinking chocolate milk afterwards is a good practice. Chocolate milk acts as a recovery drink to regain lost electrolytes and various minerals after pumping iron.

Aside from that who doesn’t love drinking chocolate milk?

4. Cinnamon: Recent scientific studies have discovered that the intake of a half teaspoon of cinnamon daily can help reduce LDL (low density lipoprotein) cholesterol. Before that cinnamon was already helping with diabetes, leukemia, and arthritis.

5. Ginger: There is a reason why this spice has been around for a long time and will last for an even longer time. That is because it can help with motion sickness, heartburn, and ovarian cancer.

6. Garlic: Raw garlic is actually effective in treating acne and managing your cholesterol. That is if you can stand chewing and eating it.

7. Honey: Honey has a long history of being more than something sweet.

Its resume includes wound healing, preventing infection, treats diarrhea, indigestion, gastroenteritis, and stomach ulcers.

8. Lemon Water: Lemon when combined with water gives it the ability to alkalize your body and blood controlling your acidity levels. And I thought lemon was just something you wedge on the edge of your drinking glass.

9. Hydrogen Peroxide: A nice simple home remedy for teeth whitening is to take some strawberries mix with baking soda, then add lemon juice and hydrogen peroxide and you have a whitening toothpaste. To whiten teeth faster brush for 5 minutes every time. But it you’re too lazy to make this yourselves, you can try the FDA approved Smile4You, which uses exactly the same amount of peroxide a dentist use during in-surgery whitening

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treatments!

10. Water: A major causes of illnesses we feel are actually because of dehydration. That’s why whenever you feel under the weather, try to drink lots of water. Who knows you may just be dehydrated. And you know the old adage, “Drink plenty of water daily 8-10 glasses a day.”

11. Almonds: This tasty nut has been proven by science to be one of the healthiest nuts in the world. A diet that includes almonds can help reduce blood pressure.

12. Evening Primrose Oil: The extracted oil from the Primrose plant contains a fatty acid that lowers cholesterol levels, takes away fatigue, and stabilizes fluctuating hormone levels.

13. Flaxseeds: For seeds, flaxseeds are pretty nutritious. They contain omega-3 fats and are a good source of fiber. Flaxseeds are a definite requirement for your healthy diet and healthy lifestyle.

14. Jalapenos: This medium sized chili pepper like its spicy brethren can also increase metabolism. So to burn calories faster make sure to eat some. But be careful as it’s really spicy.

15. Milk: Milk really does wonders, in this case fat free milk. Drinking fresh milk before a meal can decrease your appetite and calorie intake. This means your body is semi full and you won’t be overeating. This is ideal for people looking to lose weight.

16. Make It Raw: Now this is a not a common house ingredient but a great suggestion. A lot of people do not know that by cooking certain food and vegetables, you actually lose their essential nutrients. So when you think you are cooking and eating a healthy meal, it turns out you’re eating nothing of nutritional value. So try to cook some things raw. This way you still get the nutrients they contain.

17. Coconut: For now this is just speculation. Taking a tablespoon of virgin coconut oil can make you lose weight. This seems to work for some people so it’s worth a try. Even if it doesn’t make you lose weight, its wholesome enough anyway for everyone to do it.

18. Pine Nuts: Pine nuts have pinolenic acid, which is the opposite of an appetizer. It decreases your appetite. This is great for people who cannot control their eating habits. This is also excellent for people who are on a

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diet.

19. Vinegar: Although still being studied, a theory that vinegar can increase metabolism shows great promise. A faster metabolism equates to faster digestion of food and faster calorie burning. Vinegar is another great way to lose weight.

20. Ashes: This might be just an old wives tail, but is has been done for centuries. Whenever you have a wart just get some cooled down ashes from a fireplace or any other source and put it on the wart.

21. Aloe: Aloe is great as first aid remedy for sunburns. It can also treat wounds and various types of skin inflammations. Interestingly enough aloe can also work for constipated people.

22. Avocado: Ever wonder why avocados are used in face masks? It’s because of the vitamin E it contains. Which is good for your skin as it repairs it and gives it that youthful glow. You can also make a simple face mask with just avocado. Once your done spread it on your face and let it sit for 20 minutes.

23. Banana Peel: If you have a wart and do not want a visit to the dermatologist or pharmacy, then take a banana peel and wrap it tightly around the wart. This suffocates the wart until it disappears. Unfortunately this method can take weeks or months. So unless you’re really cheap or lazy, this might be the time to go to the doctor or pharmacist.

24. Cocoa Butter: Have dry skin? A home remedy for this is cocoa butter which is extracted from cocoa beans. Apply the white waxy material all over the dry skin area.

25. Eggs: We all know eggs contain protein. But protein from egg works wonders with hair. It makes hair stronger and shinier. So here’s a home remedy for better hair. Take an egg and mix it with moisturizing oils like coconut oil or sesame oil, then apply to your hair and wrap it off as a final touch. Nothing beats getting your hair done at the comfort of your own home.

26. Castor Oil: Use this on both your skin and hair for best results. Of course do not take it orally.

27. Mayonnaise: Using the best type of mayonnaise (made of eggs) will help give your hair shine and manageability. Wrap your hair with

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mayonnaise at least once a week and leave it on for 20 minutes before washing off.

28. Oatmeal: Oatmeal’s great benefits come in two. The first it helps you live a healthy lifestyle by providing you with a healthy breakfast rich in fiber. The second is in the beta glucan it possesses. With the aid of a washcloth, put wet oatmeal in the washcloth then let it rest on your face for 15 minutes. Your face will feel refreshed and look refreshed afterwards.

29. Toothpaste: Want to get rid of a pimple quickly? Well just apply toothpaste on it. You see toothpaste has a cooling effect that reduces skin inflammations. Once you feel the pimple tingling then the toothpaste is taking effect. This procedure also works on boils. Just do not use toothpaste overnight. If your pimple still won’t go away, we recommend ClearPores!

30. Acai Berry: Thanks to talk show host Oprah Winfrey, everyone now knows that acai berries are powerful antioxidants. Antioxidants fight off free radicals that cause your body to age. The best acai berry product has to be Pure Acai Berry Max. So make sure to get one.

31. Apples: An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Conditions it can help include prevention of cancer and Alzheimer’s, along with diabetes.

32. Berries: Whether it is blueberries or raspberries, berries contain antioxidants and many nutrients that can help with allergies. Try to incorporate it in your daily meal.

33. Grapefruit: Grapefruit comes loaded with vitamin C and flavonoids to help you stay disease free and healthy. However candy makers have sort of abused it by mixing it with their products along with juices. Given a choice of eating the fruit itself or the synthetic one, choose the natural grapefruit.

34. Pomegranate: To fight off anti-aging and even caner, choose a product that has a main ingredient of the super fruit pomegranate. For the male species, you should know that pomegranate is also known as ‘the natural Viagra’. MaleExtra contains pomegranate 70% Ellagic Acid , which helps to maintain a rock hard, solid erection leading to improved confidence in the bedroom!

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35. Cherries: For patients who suffer from arthritis drink tart cherry juice along with water 3 times a day. This is recommended by the Arthritis Foundation. Cherries are known to prevent many types of inflammations.

Just be careful because it’s really sweet.

36. Orange: No doubt the best source of vitamin C. More vitamin C means a stronger immune system to keep illness at bay. To continue living the healthy lifestyle, eat an orange a day. Along with an apple a day I guess.

37. Papaya: What more can you want from a fruit that is rich in Vitamin C and Vitamin E. Oh yeah its good for your skin too just ask any dermatologist. Papaya is great whether applied topically or taken orally.

38. Tangerines: Tangerines are known to slow down cancer with its flavonoids. It literally prevents the quick growth of cancer cells. To multiply the effects mix it up with any bright colored fruits because they usually have flavonoids as well.

39. Watermelon: If you’re one of the types of people who can’t stand drinking water to stay hydrated, then watermelons are a good alternative.

They contain a large amount of water so it can be a replacement. And also they are rich in glutathione, another antioxidant to fight off skin aging.

40. Cabbage: The great things with cabbages are that every type of cabbage contains glutathione and antioxidants. So don’t worry about picking the wrong one and just buy cabbages. Traditional, red, Chinese, and white cabbages are all good for you and your healthy lifestyle.

41. Broccoli: Ignoring the taste, broccoli is worth pinching your nose and swallowing because of the Vitamin A, Vitamin C, and Vitamin D you get from it. This will ensure you have an immune system that can stand up to any disease or infection. So kids, next time your parents say eat your broccoli, do it.

42. Elderberry: Elderberries contain a powerful antioxidant and I am not exaggerating. Just ask the 1995 Panamanina flu which it defeated. As a plus it can also defeat poor vision, cholesterol, and heart problems.

Elderberries come in supplement and juice form.

43. Eucalyptus: Vaporub has eucalyptus because it gives vaporub its ability to clear congested sinuses. So next time you don’t have vaporub, eucalyptus will do the trick. Menthol and camphor though can also act as

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excellent alternatives.

44. Mushrooms: Don’t just go picking off any mushroom you see, because only certain types contain antioxidants and selenium needed to boost the immune system. Be very careful indeed as eating the wrong type may even cause death.

45. Spinach: Popeye was a smart man. He really knew what he was doing.

Eating spinach increases cell production because of the foliate, fiber, and Vitamin C. Now if only it looked tastier and really gave you superhuman strength.

46. Sweet Potato: As much as mashed potatoes have become the standard, sweet potatoes have beta carotene for powering up the immune system. Also they have lower carbs than other potatoes and have large doses of Vitamin A, which is good for your eyes.

47. Salt Water: An interesting thing about saltwater is that when flushed in your nose it can relieve congested nasal passages. Saltwater can even remove the virus particles as well too. So whenever you need to breathe properly, mix a quarter tablespoon of salt with baking soda along with a glass of warm water. Use a bulb syringe to flush your nose for instant relief.

48. Wheat Germ: You may not like the taste of wheat germ but if you think about the zinc, antioxidants, and Vitamin B you get from it. And that it will help fight off infections, then you might just go for it. Just don’t think of the name while you’re doing it.

49. Yogurt: Yogurt can only become healthy if you choose the sugar free and fat free one. Because those are the types that have Vitamin D and can fight off diseases.

50. Cauliflower: Paired with broccoli, cauliflowers have sulforaphane, which the body uses to give healthy cells protection from cancer cells.

You can also grow the cauliflower in your own backyard to ensure you have a constant supply.

51. Curry: has turmeric, which contains many benefits that aid in fighting heart disease.

52. Dried Red Peppers: These can include cayenne, paprika, and others.

The spices help stimulate digestion and burn fat. If you want to burn fat

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and lose weight, you should take advantage of Capsiplex, which make full use of this incredible spice!

53. Epsom Salt: A great way to save money while detoxifying and curing sciatica is to soak your feet in a mixture of Epsom salt and warm water.

And if soaking your feet only isn’t enough, you can put it in your bathtub to soak your entire body.

54. Fish: Eating fish is always a good habit. A variety of fish like salmon, halibut and tuna all contain cancer fighting substances.

55. Horseradish: A dose of horseradish is more than enough to help with congestion. Applying it directly to acne and even melasma proves it is also effective.

56. Oregano: An even stronger antioxidant than broccoli is oregano. 1 teaspoon of it is equivalent to 3 cups of broccoli. That is truly amazing.

Another excuse to say you should eat pizza, pasta, and sandwiches. I’m just eating it for the antioxidant effect you can say.

57. Pepper: Pepper is added to food to make it taste better. But did you know it is also capable of improving digestion and reducing gas? Black pepper specifically contains hydrochloric acid, which gives it the capacity to do so.

58. Sea Salt: Good news for insomnia sufferers. It is worth trying to put some salt into a glass of water before going to bed. It’s guaranteed to put you to sleep.

59. Sunshine: The best thing things in life are free. In this case free Vitamin D. Just expose yourself to 10 minutes of natural sun daily and you will be fine. Just be sure you don’t get overexposed and get sunburned.

60. Thyme: comparable to oregano, Thyme has also high antioxidants content. Currently scientists believe it can be used for respiratory diseases.

61. Turmeric: Turmeric can be used for a variety of things as its cousin ginger. It can do things like treat allergies, obesity, Alzheimer’s, some certain cancers, and more.

62. Tomatoes: Lycopene is found in tomatoes, which is perfect for reducing cancer risk. To maximize the nutritional benefits of tomatoes, cook up tomato sauce or tomato paste.

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63. Legumes: If you can’t afford the rising prices of meat nowadays, legumes are a good replacement. It comes with the same proteins as meat but more affordable. Other excellent meat alternatives are beans and lentils.

64. Orange Juice: Is filled with Vitamin C and folate, which reduces your risk of cancer. As much as possible opt for orange juice without sugar so you don’t turn a healthy drink into an unhealthy one.

65. Walnuts: Nuts are rich in antioxidants that not only can slowdown aging but prevent cancer as well. You also have a rich variety to pick from: Pistachio, pecan, and many more.

66. Black Tea: Another type of tea, black tea is as healthy as its counterparts. It combats stroke and heart disease and provides fluoride for your teeth. The best part? Almost every household has one. That’s if you can remember where you put it.

67. Green Tea: Stuffed with polyphenols and antioxidants that fight off cancer, stimulate metabolism, and boost the immune system green tea is a top home remedy. You just can’t say you have a healthy lifestyle if you don’t drink green tea. You should also know that there’s a product that combines the benefits of several remarkable teas under the green tea group, Oo Long, Puerh and Sencha. This excellent fat burning green tea is Tava Tea, which is proven to ease digestion, reduce bloating and burns 2.5 times more calories than normal green tea!

68. Oolong Tea: Increase blood flow, burn calories, and build stronger bones with the help of oolong tea. It can also help with a distressed stomach.

69. Tea Bags: Before it even becomes liquid tea is already very useful. By placing the warm bags on your eyes, it provides relief for pink eyes.

70. White Tea: The cousin of green tea, it helps fight viruses and bacteria.

71. Other Herbal Remedies: Looking to go over to the green side? To try out some healing herbs like sage, aloe vera, or St. John’s Wort. We recommend NativeRemedies, the market-leading brand of natural remedies specially formulated to offer a complete solution for holistic health and wellness.

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Into The Ashram By: Christopher Stewart Always on the verge of spinning out of control

Going through the motions better than down the hole Today I will not scream I am unsatisfied Isn't this the mantra to become ossified

The things I bowed down to have me under their weight I'm not sure I recall how it feels to stand straight

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So many things I crave I think I'll never get I may be warm and fed but my needs are not met

There must be something else I have been here before But this time I'm fed up I won't take anymore Others have stopped stooping and even learned to dance When will it be my turn if I don't take the chance

I dream of India and of sabbatical Simplifying my life to the canonical Shed the superficial and leave it all behind So I may figure out how I messed up my mind

I can't keep silencing that impulse forever And let aspiration fade away to wither That's no way to progress I need to introspect And away from it all on my life to reflect

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my apocalypse - escape the fate by soluS s0ul There’s a place that I’ve found As far as I can see This place lies within The depths of my dreams In a garden surrounded By fire and trees Through the smoke a silhouette I can barely see There’s a man with an axe Standing in the rain Looked me straight in my eye This is what he had to say Never fall asleep You won’t wake up Destroy the guillotine Before he does I walk with shadows (you have to find a better way) I walk with shadows (the questions I will never say) Hiding from the gallows (they keep me safe and sound) So I walk in shadows (the ways of burning down this house) End transmission

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The satellites are down I need an earthquake To shake this pity Off the ground Just don’t trust these liars at the door (you have to find a better way) Kill the ones that have these answers for (the questions I will never say) Never fall asleep You won’t wake up Destroy the guillotine Before he does I walk with shadows (you have to find a better way) I walk with shadows (the questions I will never say) Hiding from the gallows (they keep me safe and sound) So I walk in shadows (the ways of burning down this house) End transmission The satellites are down I need an earthquake To shake this pity Off the ground All the vibrant colors I see And the shades that fill the grey Pain

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The pain Pain The pain Pain The pain Pain The pain Pain [x2] Hiding from the gallows (you have to find a better way) I walk with shadows (the questions I will never say) Hiding from the gallows (they keep me safe and sound) So I walk in shadows (the ways of burning down this house)

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Haunted Short Stories – 11 – ‘John Charrington’s Wedding’ by Edith Nesbit (1891) No one ever thought that May Forster would marry John Charrington; but he thought differently, and things which John Charrington intended had a queer way of coming to pass. He asked her to marry him before he went up to Oxford. She laughed and refused him. He asked her again next time he came home. Again she laughed, tossed her dainty blonde head and again refused. A third time he asked her; she said it was becoming a confirmed bad habit, and laughed at him more than ever.

John was not the only man who wanted to marry her: she was the belle of our village coterie, and we were all in love with her more or less; it was a sort of fashion, like masher collars or Inverness capes. Therefore we were as much annoyed as surprised when John Charrington walked into our little local Club — we held it in a loft over the saddler’s, I remember —

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and invited us all to his wedding.

‘Your wedding?’

‘You don’t mean it?’

‘Who’s the happy pair? When’s it to be?’

John Charrington filled his pipe and lighted it before he replied. Then he said: ‘I’m sorry to deprive you fellows of your only joke — but Miss Forster and I are to be married in September.’

‘You don’t mean it?’

‘He’s got the mitten again, and it’s turned his head.’

‘No,’ I said, rising, ‘I see it’s true. Lend me a pistol, someone — or a first-class fare to the other end of Nowhere. Charrington has bewitched the only pretty girl in our twenty-mile radius. Was it mesmerism, or a love-potion, Jack?’

‘Neither, sir, but a gift you’ll never have — perseverance — and the best luck a man ever had in this world.’

There was something in his voice that silenced me, and all chaff of the other fellows failed to draw him further.

The queer thing about it was that when we congratulated Miss Forster, she blushed and smiled and dimpled, for all the world as though she were in love with him, and had been in love with him all the time. Upon my word, I think she had. Women are strange creatures.

Story continues after the break: We were all asked to the wedding. In Brixham everyone who was anybody knew everybody else who was anyone. My sisters were, I truly believe, more interested in the trousseau than the bride herself, and I was to be best man. The coming marriage was much canvassed at afternoon tea-tables, and at our little Club over the saddler’s, and the question was always asked, ‘Does she care for him?’

I used to ask that question myself in the early days of their engagement, but after a certain evening in August I never asked it again. I was coming home from the Club through the churchyard. Our church is on a thyme-grown hill, and the turf about it is so thick and soft that one’s footsteps are noiseless.

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I made no sound as I vaulted the low lichened wall, and threaded my way between the tombstones. It was at the same instant that I heard John Charrington’s voice, and saw her. May was sitting on a low flat gravestone, her face turned towards the full splendor of the western sun.

Its expression ended, at once and for ever, any question of love for him; it was transfigured to a beauty I should not have believed possible, even to that beautiful little face.

John lay at her feet, and it was his voice that broke the stillness of the golden August evening.

‘My dear, my dear, I believe I should come back from the dead if you wanted me!’

I coughed at once to indicate my presence, and passed on into the shadow fully enlightened.

The wedding was to be early in September. Two days before I had to run up to town on business. The train was late, of course, for we are on the South-Eastern, and as I stood grumbling with my watch in my hand, whom should I see but John Charrington and May Forster. They were walking up and down the unfrequented end of the platform, arm in arm, looking into each other’s eyes, careless of the sympathetic interest of the porters.

Of course I knew better than to hesitate a moment before burying myself in the booking-office, and it was not till the train drew up at the platform, that I obtrusively passed the pair with my Gladstone, and took the corner in a first-class smoking-carriage. I did this with as good an air of not seeing them as I could assume. I pride myself on my discretion, but if John were travelling alone I wanted his company. I had it.

‘Hullo, old man,’ came his cheery voice as he swung his bag into my carriage; ‘here’s luck; I was expecting a dull journey!’

‘Where are you off to?’ I asked, discretion still bidding me turn my eyes away, though I saw, without looking, that hers were red-rimmed.

‘To old Branbridge’s,’ he answered, shutting the door and leaning out for a last word with his sweetheart.

‘Oh, I wish you wouldn’t go, John,’ she was saying in a low, earnest voice.

‘I feel certain something will happen.’

‘Do you think I should let anything happen to keep me, and the day after

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tomorrow our wedding day?’

‘Don’t go,’ she answered, with a pleading intensity which would have sent my Gladstone onto the platform and me after it. But she wasn’t speaking to me. John Charrington was made differently: he rarely changed his opinions, never his resolutions.

He only stroked the little ungloved hands that lay on the carriage door.

‘I must, May. The old boy’s been awfully good to me, and now he’s dying I must go and see him, but I shall come home in time for —-’ the rest of the parting was lost in a whisper and in the rattling lurch of the starting train.

‘You’re sure to come?’ she spoke as the train moved.

‘Nothing shall keep me,’ he answered; and we steamed out. After he had seen the last of the little figure on the platform he leaned back in his corner and kept silence for a minute.

When he spoke it was to explain to me that his godfather, whose heir he was, lay dying at Peasmarsh Place, some fifty miles away, and had sent for John, and John had felt bound to go.

‘I shall be surely back tomorrow,’ he said, ‘or, if not, the day after, in heaps of time. Thank heaven, one hasn’t to get up in the middle of the night to get married nowadays!’

‘And suppose Mr Branbridge dies?’

‘Alive or dead I mean to be married on Thursday!’ John answered, lighting a cigar and unfolding The Times.

At Peasmarsh station we said ‘goodbye’, and he got out, and I saw him ride off; I went on to London, where I stayed the night.

When I got home the next afternoon, a very wet one, by the way, my sister greeted me with: ‘Where’s Mr Charrington?’

‘Goodness knows,’ I answered testily. Every man, since Cain, has resented that kind of question.

‘I thought you might have heard from him,’ she went on, ‘as you’re to give him away tomorrow.’

‘Isn’t he back?’ I asked, for I had confidently expected to find him at home.

‘No, Geoffrey,’ my sister Fanny always had a way of jumping to conclusions, especially such conclusions as were least favorable to her

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fellow-creatures — ‘he has not returned, and, what is more, you may depend upon it he won’t. You mark my words, there’ll be no wedding tomorrow.’

My sister Fanny has a power of annoying me which no other human being possesses.

‘You mark my words,’ I retorted with asperity, ‘you had better give up making such a thundering idiot of yourself. There’ll be more wedding tomorrow than ever you’ll take the first part in.’ A prophecy which, by the way, came true.

But though I could snarl confidently to my sister, I did not feel so comfortable when late that night, I, standing on the doorstep of John’s house, heard that he had not returned. I went home gloomily through the rain. Next morning brought a brilliant blue sky, gold sun, and all such softness of air and beauty of cloud as go to make up a perfect day. I woke with a vague feeling of having gone to bed anxious, and of being rather averse to facing that anxiety in the light of full wakefulness.

But with my shaving-water came a note from John which relieved my mind and sent me up to the Forsters with a light heart.

May was in the garden. I saw her blue gown through the hollyhocks as the lodge gates swung to behind me. So I did not go up to the house, but turned aside down the turfed path.

‘He’s written to you too,’ she said, without preliminary greeting, when I reached her side.

‘Yes, I’m to meet him at the station at three, and come straight on to the church.’

Her face looked pale, but there was a brightness in her eyes, and a tender quiver about the mouth that spoke of renewed happiness.

‘Mr Branbridge begged him so to stay another night that he had not the heart to refuse,’ she went on. ‘He is so kind, but I wish he hadn’t stayed.’

I was at the station at half past two. I felt rather annoyed with John. It seemed a sort of slight to the beautiful girl who loved him, that he should come as it were out of breath, and with the dust of travel upon him, to take her hand, which some of us would have given the best years of our lives to take.

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But when the three o’clock train glided in, and glided out again having brought no passengers to our little station, I was more than annoyed.

There was no other train for thirty-five minutes; I calculated that, with much hurry, we might just get to the church in time for the ceremony; but, oh, what a fool to miss that first train! What other man could have done it?

That thirty-five minutes seemed a year, as I wandered round the station reading the advertisements and the timetables, and the company’s bye-laws, and getting more and more angry with John Charrington. This confidence in his own power of getting everything he wanted the minute he wanted it was leading him too far. I hate waiting. Everyone does, but I believe I hate it more than anyone else. The three thirty-five was late, of course. I ground my pipe between my teeth and stamped with impatience as I watched the signals. Click. The signal went down. Five minutes later I flung myself into the carriage that I had brought for John.

‘Drive to the church!’ I said, as someone shut the door. ‘Mr Charrington hasn’t come by this train.’

Anxiety now replaced anger. What had become of the man? Could he have been taken suddenly ill? I had never known him have a day’s illness in his life. And even so he might have telegraphed. Some awful accident must have happened to him. The thought that he had played her false never — no, not for a moment — entered my head. Yes, some thing terrible had happened to him, and on me lay the task of telling his bride. I almost wished the carriage would upset and break my head so that someone else might tell her, not I, who — but that’s nothing to do with this story.

It was five minutes to four as we drew up at the churchyard gate. A double row of eager onlookers lined the path from lychgate to porch. I sprang from the carriage and passed up between them. Our gardener had a good front place near the door. I stopped.

‘Are they waiting still, Byles?’ I asked, simply to gain time, for of course I knew they were by the waiting crowd’s attentive attitude.

‘Waiting, sir? No, no, sir; why, it must be over by now.’

‘Over! Then Mr Charrington’s come?’

To the minute, sir; must have missed you somehow, and I say, sir,’ lowering his voice, ‘I never see Mr John the least bit so afore, but my

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opinion is he’s been drinking pretty free. His clothes was all dusty and his face like a sheet. I tell you I didn’t like the looks of him at all, and the folks inside are saying all sorts of things. You’ll see, something’s gone very wrong with Mr John, and he’s tried liquor. He looked like a ghost, and in he went with his eyes straight before him, with never a look or a word for none of us: him that was always such a gentleman!’

I had never heard Byles make so long a speech. The crowd in the churchyard were talking in whispers and getting ready rice and slippers to throw at the bride and bridegroom. The ringers were ready with their hands on the ropes to ring out the merry peal as the bride and bridegroom should come out.

A murmur from the church announced them; out they came. Byles was right. John Charrington did not look himself. There was dust on his coat, his hair was disarranged. He seemed to have been in some row, for there was a black mark above his eyebrow. He was deathly pale. But his pallor was not greater than that of the bride, who might have been carved in ivory — dress, veil, orange blossoms, face and all.

As they passed out the ringers stooped — there were six of them — and then, on the ears expecting the gay wedding peal, came the slow tolling of the passing bell.

A thrill of horror at so foolish a jest from the ringers passed through us all.

But the ringers themselves dropped the ropes and fled like rabbits out into the sunlight. The bride shuddered, and grey shadows came about her mouth, but the bridegroom led her on down the path where the people stood with the handfuls of rice; but the handfuls were never thrown, and the wedding bells never rang. In vain the ringers were urged to remedy their mistake: they protested with many whispered expletives that they would see themselves further first.

In a hush like the hush in the chamber of death the bridal pair passed into their carriage and its door slammed behind them.

Then the tongues were loosed. A babel of anger, wonder, conjecture from the guests and the spectators.

‘If I’d seen his condition, sir,’ said old Forster to me as we drove off, ‘I would have stretched him on the floor of the church, sir, by heaven I

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would, before I’d have let him marry my daughter!’

Then he put his head out of the window.

‘Drive like hell,’ he cried to the coachman; ‘don’t spare the horses.’

He was obeyed. We passed the bride’s carriage. I forbore to look at it, and old Forster turned his head away and swore. We reached home before it.

We stood in the doorway, in the blazing afternoon sun, and in about half a minute we heard wheels crunching the gravel. When the carriage stopped in front of the steps old Forster and I ran down.

‘Great heaven, the carriage is empty! And yet —-’ I had the door open in a minute, and this is what I saw . . .

No sign of John Charrington; and of May, his wife, only a huddled heap of white satin lying half on the floor of the carriage and half on the seat.

‘I drove straight here, sir,’ said the coachman, as the bride’s father lifted her out; ‘and I’ll swear no one got out of the carriage.’

We carried her into the house in her bridal dress and drew back her veil. I saw her face. Shall I ever forget it? White, white and drawn with agony and horror, bearing such a look of terror as I have never seen since except in dreams. And her hair, her radiant blonde hair, I tell you it was white like snow.

As we stood, her father and I, half mad with the horror and mystery of it, a boy came up the avenue — a telegraph boy. They brought the orange envelope to me. I tore it open.

Mr Charrington was thrown from the dogcart on his way to the station at half past one. Killed on the spot!

And he was married to May Forster in our parish church at half past three, in presence of half the parish. ‘I shall be married, dead, or alive!’

What had passed in that carriage on the homeward drive? No one knows — no one will ever know. Oh, May! oh, my dear!

Before a week was over they laid her beside her husband in our little churchyard on the thyme-covered hill — the churchyard where they had kept their love-trysts.

Thus was accomplished John Charrington’s wedding.

THE END.

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The following is a very touching and important post by Dark Fyre, it was posted on a few sites on ning and the responses have been added as well, welcome to the journey of having a child with autism~ This is my story...

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When my son was diagnosed with adhd and also aspergers ....I went into a downward spiral of many mixed emotions .. At first I were in denial...how could my child have this? no way... they are so wrong ..... I was a little furious that they even mentioned he seems to have a problem, ( the usual parents go through, ) Until one day, They asked me to come in and just sit and watch him in school....So I went to school to observe how he behaves at school... and I couldn't believe it!

I was seeing something I never seen at home ...The way he walked....how he behaved around the others......his emotions...fears... he would not talk to any one at all........and I'm not talking your typical shy child .He just would not communicate ! No emotion what so ever..Its as if he had lost him self somewhere.... Then a second later he would be screaming and throwing a tantrum etc... I was in shock... why did I not see this? why is he different here then home? Then again home is home.. there are no others here , for him to have to deal with ...just us..... ...many questions filled my head ..until I finally broke down and cried ....I felt defeated I felt I had done something wrong ....i struggled with all of my memories of his earliest childhood years, trying to figure out where did it all go wrong?

Had he become this way because of something I had done wrong...... why I asked myself ..he couldn't be like the other children....how will his life turn out now? How will this effect him .....

I just want him to be happy and have a good life... can he? will he? Will other children bully him , laugh at and tease him ,hurt him, because he's different? I was in total devastation...

This was my first child and before this I had never had any experience with children what so ever...when I were younger holding a baby even felt awkward - so imagine the emotions there..

After the all pity parties I held for myself ...and after all the fear and hurt I felt for my child - within those ....I knew I had to pick myself up... and be strong for him..... learn everything I need to learn about this....... and do everything in my power as a mom to make his life what he deserves it to be.......

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I spent countless hours reading ...everything about autism ,adhd, children's learning disabilities...I mean everything! I would be up until the crack of dawn...... studying up..learning all I can .. to arm myself .. prepare myself for this battle... As the years slowly slipped by...one major problem I had was with some of the teachers....They were very intolerant to his behaviors and would in meetings ask me why I cant control my child.. why doesn't he pay attention in class,, why doesn't he participate? ( knowing he is on the autism spectrum) But still putting a lot of blame on him and me....telling me I'm his mom ...and I need to learn to control him ( these are teachers with some education on children's disabilities) they were taught to know how to deal with these children - they are taught to understand about the behaviors -I have no fuckin degree! I'm doing the best I can! My child is on the spectrum - his behaviors are a part of his condition! they know this! so WTF!

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I started becoming angry...People think sometimes that the behaviors can be controlled easily, but they are not! hell we still have yet to understand why and learn about them what is in the mind of autism and children with autism ....Some people looked at an autistic child as nothing but a spoiled brat - which was far from the truth ....You would get constantly blamed for these behaviors and called a bad mother......

So the teachers and doctors decided .... The best way to deal with this all was to drug my child...... This was the tool of choice....made their lives a hella better ! right?! Now they can go on and teach in peace.... whilst my child looses himself in the ever so wonderful world of being drugged up...... (( of course at first I didn't feel this way I thought that , it will be a good thing for him and the only way to help him))) stupid I was....I'm not putting down the pharmaceutical world here..( not a fan of it either) .. some people really need a little drug therapy.... when there is nothing left to do and it helps keep them from hurting their self or others right? no?

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Anywho...so we tried this approach.... for a while Oh the teachers loved it...it kept them sane for a while there! they had their peace! Me I wasn't so sure about it..I started to notice changes....Yes during the day in school he was more settled....Quiet....... But at home at night he couldn't sleep! he could not eat! he behavior started to become a little on the violent side... (( I'll never forget the heart wrenching day , when he came home and asked me mom why cant i be like all the rest of the kids why am I so different? why do I have to take medicine?? that day his words to this day still haunt me today....How do you answer this to a child ....)))

He was fighting with his little brother a lot....he would bite , pinch kick punch ...I had a lot of bruises those days..soon after teachers started to complain again to me .... that he's falling asleep in class not eating he looks lethargic.. etc....Well hello?! he's on drugs !? maybe this is the reason why? the drugs was actually more so for his adhd ...concerta - if I spelled that correctly.... They were once again all up my arse.....They wanted to up his doses of drugs!!! So I decided to do something else this time.. it was a little risk I took but it had to be done...... I went against his teachers doctors and neurologist/psychologist ...and I slowly eased him off the med and then ceased to give it to him....

Not letting them know this of course , not yet anyway...as the days went by I got less complaints..then I even got a compliment that he was doing real good paying attention and all....so this is when i decided to make an appointment with his neuropsychologist.... To talk about what I had done, and the changes is had made....He told me then so be it ..if it works then he don't need any drugs...and the hell with teachers .... he said they are all just looking to better their days by throwing the kids on drugs makes life easier for them.....tell them to go $%$## yeah he did... .. ( : haha .

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We then decided a little group therapy with kids like him at the children's hospital would be good for him... social skills classes....To learn to interact and so on.....learn about feelings emotions empathy etc....So the yrs slip by again.... At first they went well...he was making friends having fun,, but as the yrs went by and he kept going to these things he grew weary and also started to developed anxiety until the last day we went...( yes once again I acted on my own. and took him off these courses) he just had a total anxiety /panic attack whilst we were their waiting in the waiting room for the therapists to take the children up.. so I told them that' day I were taking him home and never went back to the children's hospital...after that- I asked him later why? why d id it bother him so much....He told me..because it were the same thing over and over again each year....their not progressing into anything new ..... So this is when I began my journey- my own way in handling his condition..I taught him everything, about people emotions .... style....situations and how people handle them....but more importantly I took on a diff approach I did not baby him.. I was very blunt and honest

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...about autism , him , people etc..........and most of all I allowed him to be him.... I taught him to love himself regardless of any differences .. we would talk all the time about everything ... he's told me many things about his thoughts.....his visions.... the world and people...... things I never thought of or seen....I started to realize there is something different here....

also which I never mentioned he was so... so.... so........ very in tuned with my inner feelings thoughts and emotions..... he knew I was going to be sad or angry before I was ...... he just knew things no one else would ever know ....... he told me about the universe....at times.... and mankind as he would put it in his words... ( : I can go on but I wont.... ( : which brings me to the end of this blog I was inspired to share this with you all because if a posting I read today by Karen cottle ( autism ramblings about life)...it most def touched me it resonated with me so much .. there is definitely something there too think about.....Thank you Karen ....

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Responses from Keepers Of the Realms: Comment by Andrew Rutledge Creator Too many people look at this as a disability & try to not focus on their needs, for the most part I am against the idea of drugs unless it is absolutely needed and all other possible approaches have been explored. Too many people are misinformed about Autism and think they are slow and need to be treated as such, & that is so wrong, they are so smart to a degree of being a genius in certain areas and excel better than most other kids. I have personally seen what dealing with the schools systems and other programs are like, it is, to be blunt, a joke the way they just seem not to care and do everything in their power to see that you don't get the right care & help you need. I wish there was more laws in affect to make them do their jobs right and make sure that every child no matter what there conditions are, got the very best care that they need!

Thank you for sharing something so personal and know you are not the only one here that deals with this.

Comment by Gossamer Wings Hi Dark Fyre, I have a son with Aspergers and ADD as well. I know the heart wrenching difficulties you went through as I had to go through them myself. I have 4 children, 3 are neurotypical but it's my youngest that has this so I was unprepared for the diagnosis. I cried myself to sleep countless nights but I was also determined to do whatever it took to help my child. Like you, I read everything I could get my hands on, I joined a support group and we spent years in therapies.

Alexander is a very bright little boy, with the cutest dimples you ever saw but there are times when he creeps back into his own little world. As you know, Aspies have a hard time making friends as they are perceived as weird by their peers. When classmates were being invited to birthday parties, my son was never on those lists of invitees. He wanted friends so badly that it broke my heart. It still does as I see how other children will shy away from him. However, he's so much better now than he was. We still have issues like holding a pencil correctly and help with focusing. He takes amphetamine salts for that and Zoloft for anxiety. While life is not perfect, he has been able to make 3 good friends now.

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They all have ADHD, lol, so maybe that's his niche? We see a psychologist on a regular basis to help him with social skills and she's been wonderful. We have a center for autism here where we live and honestly, without that I would be at a loss. I really commend you for teaching your child about emotions as I have had to do the same, but it gets better and I fully expect Alex to lead a normal adult life, or I should say what will be normal for him. He's only 9 but I still see progress and with each small step forward, I think in terms of monumental progress! He is the most special child I know. He loves animals and truly understands them. He too talks about the universe and and his place in it and for some insane reason I'm kind of jealous that he in fact has a place that's his own little world. All I can say is to advocate for your child and never give up! There will very soon come a time when everyone in the world will be affected by autism, either directly or indirectly. Educating others is extremely important. I do it all the time. So thank you for your blog and know that you are not alone!

Comment by Sweet Dark Angel thank you so much for sharing your story dark fyre, it really is comforting having two people at least on this site that are going thru similar issues as I am, my youngest has autism, and my teen was just diagnosed in the emotionally disturbed I have only been given one option through the school district to help him, so I'm about to go hunting through the other districts nearby, to see if there is a better option as the one they gave me involves a bunch of kids doing little to nothing from what i saw in observation...sigh~ the battle seems to be never-ending ~ Comment by valerie oh you poor thing! i had a teacher convince me to put one of my children on adderall. mistake. took him right back off it. i do not think children should be controlled like that. you can use innovative thinking for this. drugging them leads to abuse as they get older, proven fact. my grandson is 3 and my daughter is having him tested for autism because he won't speak, lines things up and fights with other kids. i wish you the best of luck with this. keep us posted.

Comment by Gossamer Wings Unfortunately, sometimes medications are the only option. In my son's case, he can not concentrate without withdrawing and going back into his little world without the amphetamines and the Zoloft helps with the extreme anxiety he has.

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He's on the absolute lowest dose and it works. We don't give him the amphetamines on the weekends or during summer break so he does get a break from it. He has no side effects like some children get but overall, it's helping him.

Trust me, I tried everything before turning to meds. However, in our case they have been a lifesaver!

Comment by Sweet Dark Angel yes my older son had to be put on anti-psychotics, he was so confrontational, argumentative and gets agitated to the point where he cant calm himself down at times, each case is different for sure, some need it some can get by without, i do think is always best to try without and attempt other methods, but when your home becomes a war-zone and your younger children witness, you have to do something...unfortunately, finding your way thru the maze of services in order to access to what you need is confusing, and sometimes you get little help till you educate yourself with your rights, i just found a book called Nolo's IEP guide it is helping me a lot, and regional center does offer courses for learning the IEP process as far as finding a good psychiatrist, well my insurance gave me no good options, i got one Psychiatrist who spoke to us 15 minutes, told me he was bipolar ignoring his brand new diagnosis of a personality disorder, and threw a med at us. We are now seeing someone new, paying out of my pocket, but its worth it, as she is thorough, going thru his history and behavioral characteristics with me, we are charting his progress on the meds so we can fine tune where needed...

Comment by valerie oh i feel for him and you...i really hate when kids have problems, they are so innocent i dont think you mentioned how old, can I ask how old and how long you guys have been dealing with this?

Comment by Sweet Dark Angel he is 15 now, and since he was little, he has been in the special education system since kindergarten they even wouldn't keep him in preschool he was so hard to handle.

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Comment by valerie also, i am in md. they have a program called child find. it helps with finding resources and proper classes based on what the problems are. you can maybe check with health department or social services where you are, if you have the program where you are, try to access it they are good.

Comment by Sweet Dark Angel yep, just got approved for ab27/26 which is where social services begins to help had to get it thru the school, as i said, theres a process to it all, a maze, gotta go here first, then there, i been pointed in so many directions I get dizzy often LOL you name the dept i been there called that, its all about having the correct wording, asking for the right thing, they dont make it easy let me tell you, i know im doing all i can and all the right track, just impatient, its such a long battle...

Comment by 路路Dark Fyre路路 @ Andrew....I have this blog going on 3 sites now.. and on two of them ours here and another one....i am getting so much feedback and replies that im sorry that it is taking me so much time to reply here....wish i could somehow mix the two together....so everyone could read all the replies...from both sites..i got alot of wonderful replies from many people..You are right something needs to be done with the school system and also doctors - who seem to lack understanding and supports...... for the parent and child.....seems these days a quick fix is best...... just to shut our children up as so they do not distract others......I am not a fan of pharmaceuticals- and i try to avoid medication if there are possibilities of other effective therapies , only choose to go that way is there is not any other option.....when my child was first medicated i thought it was something he (HAD) to take ..That there was no other choice......But back then i was younger uneducated....about children and also these sort of conditions.... etc...It took alot of my time - countless hours spent talking to people about it reading articles looking for info and sites with info just so i

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know what i were up against , learn my options and rights......and how to deal..... but we must arm ourselves ...with all we can to be able to help our little ones......and sometimes fight the system ..when he was little it was very difficult.......i went through a lot of violent episodes with him ...where i would wind up with bruises all over and also bites....and so would his little brother .... this all seemed to cease after my removal of his medications......and many hours spent trying to get into his head .....my son took concierta (if that is spelled correctly), it was mainly for his adhd...but left he with awful effects....just wasnt the right kind of therapy in my case for my child...... though sometimes medication is well needed for some - depending on what level of th e spectrum they are as what other conditions ( neurological) they have accompanying the autism - usually a child with autism usually has another underlying condition as well.........anyhow thank you Andrew for replying means alot to have all of everyones supports..more then you can imagine...!

Comment by 路路Dark Fyre路路 @ gossamer wings....... My dear lady! first i want to say your Alexander is so beautiful! what a lovely child! looks like an angel ( : and i thank you as well for sharing your story! It is something important to share and to learn from one another... the support is something that helps us through those heart wrenching tough times...And let me tell you it never ends even when they grow......their still that little innocent child in your eyes.... my son now is 15 and in high school and i have to say doing very very well.....he amazes me so much! he has come a long way.....he is beautiful inside out..! smart, funny everyone who meets him just loves him.....just

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you wait and see ...your son will be the same as well.........just always be there for him and remember this.regardless of what any one else told me that i need to do or what they thought was most important........ what my son needed and wanted was number one.......... for me.....i listened to his needs . to his reactions he couldn't handle any more of the therapies at the hospital it was good for him at first , but as he grew older it became this horrid routine that he dreaded deeply , if he said it was enough , then it was enough..........there were simply no need to make him go through anxiety of having to go through those classes anymore I told them he wont be coming back no more because he didn't wish to anymore they were starting to stress him more then anything and that was it( and im glad i made that choice and listened to him) listening to adults who had went through all of that as children and their thoughts on those therapies and memories of then and all and how that made them feel , now really assures me that my choice was right....sometimes you just have to let them just be them.......people are trying too hard to normalize these kids ..into what fits their mold of a human being ...... gawds i wish you could read this one persons reply to me on this subject.. i am going to have to ask him and them ..... maybe they will allow me to add that here toolisten to your children , really listen to them and observe..how they react to different things and people...........let them be them.......... let them feel free to express......imagination is very important and very important to them and their world....let them have some sort of childhood - a break from always having to go to the doctors and therapies........let them be children thank you gossamer for sharing with us .. you will see how much Alex surprises you in the future...... wait and see!

Comment by 路路Dark Fyre路路 @ SDA awwwe hunny know this.. that you are not alone........ and anytime you need someone just to vent to im here for you hun...i know how

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difficult it is and here you have two ...... i can imagine how overwhelming it is ....... as for programs i never really had went to any programs... we had iep meetings....... he went to regular schools with no special needs classes at first yes when he were first diagnoses and younger- but as time progresses they sent him to regular schools ..... also maybe for speech when younger and occupational therapy ... we had a neuro/ psychologist who he would see every 6 months .....and then the children s hospital for social skills - all of this was arranged through his primary care doctor...an the school system ...other then that he lived life as a normal kiddo..... but of course regardless i had countless arguments with some teachers - i just think some of them just couldn't handle having to deal with him , even though they had a degree to do so... Sda the best thing you can do is stay close to your child.. talk alotttttttttt to them always so long as you don't notice them gettin to agitated ..........teach them about friendships life people.........behaviors........ etc.... you will be fine you are a strong woman and a wonderful mom (((huggles))))))))))) love ya hunny Comment by 路路Dark Fyre路路 valerie i think my friend had her son in the program childfind ..shes in va....

Comment by Sweet Dark Angel thank you dark fyre and thank you so much for sharing your story I am finding so much comfort knowing you guys are here, and understand...it means a lot...

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Responses From Pagan UnderWorld Comment by Silvershoe (!) B.W. I personally appreciate your Post.

Thank you.

Comment by Persephone I had a wonderful insight from a caller of a radio show who is autistic, he is a Doctor and shares some information on this clip. Please wait it out till he gets on with the Radio Show hosts then listen to a few insightful information. https://www.boldthinking.com/store/index.php/customer/account/login/https://www.boldthinki ng.com/store/index.php/customer/account/login/

Comment by Qnuan Hi Dark Fyre If you don’t mind me using you to illustrate a point… Imagine you were forced to move to a place very foreign to you. A place where everybody criticize, and question everything you do. In that place nobody thinks like you, so you are alone and cut off. In addition, the people living there prevent you from retreating into the thoughts and places, which gives you comfort, to take an example: the sharing of abstract thoughts, which defines your sense of worth and who you are. Your freedom is, thus very strictly controlled and your way of being is dictated and scrutinized. You feel threatened, not just emotionally, but also physically by the people around you. You feel ashamed and shy all the time.

What am I describing here? The point I’m trying to make is this: is the strain and fear of being different not the problem instead of being different itself? If I’m different from someone, but am treated with respect and consideration; if people show interest in what I think about, I will feel like part of the group,

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vis-à-vis, that can change very quickly. I think the feeling of constant rejection, conflict, and mal-stimulation evokes a psychological frustration, rather than necessarily evoking a psychological/psychiatrically illness. Hence my question is: can frustration be confused for illness?

Apropos, Einstein also had a learning disability, and from what I heard, he failed his final year in high school three times! This puts things in perspective, does it not? :-) Comment by ··Dark Fyre·· @ Qnuan--What am I describing here? The point I’m trying to make is this: is the strain and fear of being different not the problem instead of being different itself?

What i think..Arnos... is yes it can become a big problem ,but that's from just my point of view..though i'm sure many would feel the same too...That's why i always taught my son to be proud of who he is , never hide his true self - show it to the world with pride .... some may not like it, but that is human-kinds flaw......not being able to accept people for their differences...... if they cant accept its their problem , but never let them put you down or make you feel like you don't belong ...... their will be many who will admire you for your courage of showing your true self...... and for whom you are with awe.... and when things got to be too much for him with therapies or doctors........i listened to him and his frustrations..... and i put a stop to it...regardless of what anyone else thought meaning doctors ,teachers, family ....his thoughts were of more importance to me...Some times families make the mistake of only hearing the doctors..... and getting involved in deeper therapies and i truly believe it hurts more then helps... unless of course there are other underlying problems ....

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. Hence my question is: can frustration be confused for illness? probably yes..... especially if you cannot communicate those frustrations to someone family, doctor , teacher.......that's why it was always more important for me to listen to my son - more then the doctors.... because honestly as much as they studies learned and whatever degrees they have.......... they don't have the answers to autism -no one does! a degree don't mean you know more and are smarter about something's in my opinion , specially concerning autism .... but who am i to say ? I don't know everything , maybe what i say is wrong to someone else?

they believe Einstein had autism i think.........but back in those days they didn't have such things? (diagnosis's ) (autism) and look how much this man has taught and changed accomplished......... makes me think supposed he were born in this time with such (conditions ) as autism ...would he have accomplished as much ? would he be viewed differently .. how would it have changed what we thought of him? would it not change?

Comment by ··Dark Fyre·· Perse thank you! i will take a look at it when i can catch some extra time! ( : Comment by ··Dark Fyre·· silvershoe thank you!!! ( : Comment by Devilwoman SALUT doll, I to have a son with autism. He has aspergers, tourettes, ODD,

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ADHD,Bipolar..

I read everything, tried everything, was annoyed with how impatient society is.

I came to the conclusion, I shouldn't change him but delight in who he is, and how he is...

I want him happy, and that is what I seek for him, happiness..

Love ya to , Devilwoman Comment by 路路Dark Fyre路路 and a Salut to you miss Devil ;-) that's exactly how i feel . my son he is amazing..he is beautiful & smart...... I love him and would never change a thing..... what i think is society needs a change...a big one indeed mwah! love ya to hun

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Responses from Temple Illuminatus Comment by Daniel "AloeMantis" To all friends :) Feel free to share my posts / replies around on other sites to help spread awareness. I’m glad to be a part of this together, passing the inspiration on for others. I’ll be writing a few articles of my own soon with thoughts on Einstein, autism, and empathic ability, and those are free to share as well. /|

Comment by Arreheton I must say that I have utmost respect for you and your son, and in fact for everyone else who went through similar difficulties (and still does). Thank you all for opening up and sharing your stories!

Our established society can be a very rude and ignorant one when it comes to behaviour that does not fit into comfortable categories nor is easy to cope with, so they like to numb those deviants to fit into their shiny little world.

What cannot be seen, does not exist... I think that is the motto of this kind of people. And in regards to school... I think the time spent there is a phase where we are molded in a very strong way by the experiences we gain there.

So it must be horrible to not feel accepted and to feel alien. I am not autistic nor specially gifted in a way that would be relevant to this topic but I once have been a quiet outsider that got beaten up on a regular basis since the early school years (it would be the Elementary School and Junior High in the US, I guess). Well, it changed later as I stood up for my views, beginning with my teen years, I think. So I got a tiny glimpse of what you and other people must feel that do not 'fit' into their tiny little 08/15 worlds.

Most hopefully our society is going to change. Dark Fyre, Karen and others just did their part in raising awareness and changing it for the better. And to all those that are directly or indirectly 'affected': Stay strong! You are good as you are!

Comment by Bruce Maughs From Unconditional Love ©2005 University Of Metaphysical Sciences page 11 & 12 A World Full of Love “Down from the deep and high up to the Stars LOVE is flooding the

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Universe…” —Hildegard of Bingen When we pay attention to the presence of love, to the uninhibited flow of this creative energy, we begin to notice more and more the manifestations of love on the planet. One such emergence of unconditional love is beautifully shown in the work of Barry and Suzi Kaufman. After learning about the power of beliefs, Barry and Suzi Kaufman began to look differently at their son, Raun, who was diagnosed with autism. Many people would continually say how sad their family’s situation is, but despite these remarks, Barry and Suzi Kaufman began to focus on the beauty in the situation. They focused on the gentleness of their son and the hope in that he was alive.

They focused on loving him unconditionally. Instead of trying to make Raun fit into the societal views of what it is to be normal, they instead focused on flowing their love to him just as he was. Through years of being with his accepting and loving parents, Raun completely outgrew his autism. Barry and Suzi Kaufman have worked with many children and adults using this process, which they call the Option Process. Barry Kaufman explains that the Option Process means that “you decide to love other people·and yourself, of course·by being happy with them just as they are, without needing to change them in any way, although you certainly could want and try to help others to be all that they want to be for themselves.” (www.context.org) While people are being cured by the Option Process, Barry Kaufman draws our attention to what he feels is the real miracle: the way that we can all extend and respond to unconditional love.

As we express love more and choose love as the path and focus of our lives, we begin to naturally gravitate toward more loving action. As these practices become natural and effortless, we develop and refine the heart chakra energies so that we are able to stabilize and ground the energy

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of unconditional love in our daily life.

When this practice takes on such a focus, and the old patterns are replaced by a more unlimited way of thinking and being, we can come to see the world in a new way, as a place in which every interaction and relationship is our teacher, and our lesson is to be love.

Comment by walks with stars Hey there dark fyre I have a special needs kid, which I co-parent with my sister. He has global dyspraxia and a speach impediment. I did not realize until after my awakening, and learning about crystals and indigos that he is actually a crystal. He watched an entire movie about the "Lost Tomb of Jesus", which I thought was kinda boring. He said it was interesting. He struggles with things like speach and writing, but he is a wise kid. I have been trying to teach him things by watching star wars and talking to him about dimensions. People look him over because he is akward and different, but he is beautiful. I myself spent most of my education in special education, but I am as bright as they come.

I would think that the special needs kids need a completely different learning model. I know I could have used one.

A gift...that is what they are, a gift from heaven....

Comment by Daniel "AloeMantis" I bet sharing these discussions can make good practice for writing a full book down the road. :D I do think we’re seeing a time of big frustrations that can too easily be taken for illness; and darn those vaccinations, we had at least three mandatory shots in my school days.

I think if Einstein were alive today things would surely be harder for him, but despite any isolations, he wouldn’t be stopped. Great minds who have something new to express can be very energetically wild (Joan of Arc energy) and break free into the outside world instead of following the paperwork that kept them inside on detention. In Einstein’s case, and probably relating to many of our experiences, he wasn’t making the grade because of crossing out homework questions and filling in answers of his own, and it would have been hard to diagnose him with any real learning disabilities. Although he didn’t follow the rules, he could always be found at the library, discovering

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the world in his own way. I can understand why it took Einstein some time to graduate. Sometimes we’ve got to repeat any given answers we know will give us the grade – learning to become part of the system, and then overcoming it.

This present day and age will be much harder for any Einstein child, and hopefully not so much because of the economy and lack of jobs (education narrowing down career paths) but after all these passed eras in times of discovery, the school system now seems to focus on studying the philosophy of the past over attempting to learn anything new for the future. Most teachers become settled upon the worldly facts and ideals we know to be true, so being questioned about the universe by a child (with disorders) would be a behaviour they don’t approve of. If an Einstein child came out Right Now claiming to know an alternative perception of the universe, he’d have to learn French and Basketball first, and follow the rules before having a chance to express it, and be criticised about it – especially when it comes to communicating with higher spiritual beings – and so the psychiatry begins…

My sister was the one who really had the sight for spirits, and still does. I’m not sure if I remember certain messages since childhood, but I was very in tune with my emotions and wondering why other kids chose the way of fighting and differentiating from each other, and this was a sensitivity problem I had to be smartened up to early with karate and boys camps in order to get away from the clouds and adapt to the psychical world. There sure is a good point here about ‘normalization’ where if a kid feels different, they are taught that becoming more like everyone else is the answer to fitting in. Going by that approach, they do gradually fall out of communication with intuition and Spirit, and it’s only later on in life when they can find their way into a group of intuitive people helping them to become open again, and it’s a process of unlearning and relearning – becoming and overcoming… :D We’ll all write a few books someday /| ~ Dan / Aloe Comment by ··Dark Fyre··t Karen i admire you and your courage for doing what you believe in.........you are a wonderful person...! and im sure you are

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very proud of your kids too... as for the book idea! sounds awesome! hehe ( : i think the world needs to be able to view things from someone elses perspective other then a doctors..... not that there arent many stories out there but , there can never be enough!

Comment by ··Dark Fyre·· What am I describing here? The point I’m trying to make is this: is the strain and fear of being different not the problem instead of being different itself?

What i think..Arnos... is yes it can become a big problem ,but that's from just my point of view..though im sure many would feel the same too...That's why i always taught my son to be proud of who he is , never hide his true self - show it to the world with pride .... some may not like it, but that is humankinds flaw......not being able to accept people for their differences...... if they cant accept its their problem , but never let them put you down or make you feel like you don't belong ...... their will be many who will admire you for your courage of showing your true self...... and for whom you are with awe.... and when things got to be too much for him with therapies or doctors........i listened to him and his frustrations..... and i put a stop to it...regardless of what anyone else thought meaning doctors ,teachers, family ....his thoughts were of more importance to me...Some times families make the mistake of only hearing the doctors..... and getting involved in deeper therapies and i truly believe it hurts more then helps... unless of course there are other underlying problems ....

. Hence my question is: can frustration be confused for illness? probably yes..... especially if you cannot communicate those frustrations to someone - family, doctor , teacher.......that's why it was always more important for me to listen to my son - more then the doctors.... because honestly as much as they studies learned and whatever degrees they have.......... they don't have the answers to autism -no one does! a degree don't mean you know more and are smarter about somethings in my opinion , specially concerning autism .... but who am i to say ? I don't know everything , maybe what i say is wrong to someone else? they believe Einstein had autism i think.........but back in those days they

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didn't have such things? (diagnosis's ) (autism) and look how much this man has taught and changed accomplished......... makes me think supposed he were born in this time with such (conditions ) as autism ...would he have accomplished as much ? would he be viewed differently .. how would it have changed what we thought of him? would it not change?

Comment by Arno Groesbeek Hi Dark Fyre If you don’t mind me using you to illustrate a point… Imagine you were forced to move to a place very foreign to you. A place where everybody criticize, and question everything you do. In that place nobody thinks like you, so you are alone and cut off. In addition, the people living there prevent you from retreating into the thoughts and places, which gives you comfort, to take an example: the sharing of abstract thoughts, which defines your sense of worth and who you are. Your freedom is, thus very strictly controlled and your way of being is dictated and scrutinized. You feel threatened, not just emotionally, but also physically by the people around you. You feel ashamed and shy all the time.

What am I describing here? The point I’m trying to make is this: is the strain and fear of being different not the problem instead of being different itself? If I’m different from someone, but am treated with respect and consideration; if people show interest in what I think about, I will feel like part of the group, vis-à-vis, that can change very quickly. I think the feeling of constant rejection, conflict, and mal-stimulation evokes a psychological frustration, rather than necessarily evoking a psychological/psychiatrically illness. Hence my question is: can frustration be confused for illness?

Apropos, Einstein also had a learning disability, and from what I heard, he failed his final year in high school three times! This puts things in perspective, does it not? :-) Comment by Karen Cottle (aka Pallas) Thank you, sweetheart. It is difficult being a pioneer or way shower. Think of all those before us to who have changed how humanity view things. Holding hands and sharing experiences certainly strengthen us and make us feel like

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what we're doing is worthwhile and stops us feeling so alone.

I've been treated as strange and kooky all my life - simply because I viewed things differently and didn't want to follow where everyone else went. I never believed in vaccinations or what doctors told me - I simply investigated and found my own answers. I brought my children up very differently. I see sometimes how they couldn't connect with others and it made me feel really guilty but I persevered.

It was difficult because even my mother thought I was crazy but today I realise that it was part of my learning curve and am grateful for all the difficulties I went through - never knowing if I was following the right path or not. Hindsight is a great thing - pity we can't have foresight... :) But believe me - it pays off in the end as you have all discovered.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your insights - I feel a book of some kind coming on!!! Almost like a Chicken Soup for the Soul type thing...

Arno - first i want to thank you for taking the time in reading and responding in my blog...... ( : second i want to say it is a total honour , knowing you ,having you reply here in my blog with the story of your life...you are an amazing soul, you have come along way and im proud to know you - your mom is a wonderful - strong woman, it can be scary sometimes when you have everyone pitted against you (specially of some sorts of authority) You know you are right but hey! their the one with the degree !! so they know whats better for your child i say BULLCHIT! It takes a lot of strength to deal with all of those people , but it can be done....she did well and i know she is proud of you...like i am of my son as well....... hes 15 now in high school and doing real well......had a plethora of fans......teachers love him and his personality , so do the kids hes like the class clown- but not a trouble maker,.lol It would be really hard to tell for a person whom doesn't know him well that he had a past like he did......What i do miss though is our talks the days when he were young and learning.... that little place in my mind - that little world which we could not ever imagine of..... a lot of that seemed to fade out as well...... the things that he had told me Arno,it were so long ago i could hardly remember exactly what it were ...he was so young maybe 5 , 6 ..he talked of planets and stars and galaxy....he spoke of people (mankind) as if he weren't a part of their world.....if you understand ... he said he was told a lot about thee fate of people...about a change ....about how they cant see the

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world for what really is.....they see only what they manifest in their mind or something like that ? about vessels..... about war and hate a lot of what he said was very hard to understand . ohh and angels too about supreme being he mentioned the supreme a lot........his talk was almost cryptic I remember when he would tell me...i would fear that hes lost some touch with reality - like where is he getting this from? why is he talking about this ?......but then i would think how does he know about some of the things he talks about . like planets galaxies....... vessels angels a supreme being? hes too young to talk like he talked....to understand anything of the sort too ...... eventually it changed after the therapies in the children 's hospital you said something that to me is so truthful now....you saidLook at it this way: perhaps the world in general is too shallow and hollow, and when someone extraordinary is born they try to extinguish them by “normalizing,” them, trying to assimilate them into their ignorance and emptiness. I believe one of the many purposes of adhd children is to wake men up from their mundane slumber. We all have dreams and hopes when we’re young (well most of us in anyway), but when we grow up we stop believing in those dreams and ideals. and you are riight about that indeed... arno thank you so much for sharing here with us (((hugs)) to you .....Darkfyre Comment by ··Dark Fyre·· @ Karen- ohh no Karen, you contribute a great deal (most importantly love) but also acceptance, understanding, compassion , wanting to know more your supports-outstanding...... thank you for the person you are and for all the love you share..... (((huggs)))) Comment by ··Dark Fyre·· Daniel that Einstein picture is indeed very awesome- and speaks of the truth.... ( : (((hugs)))

Comment by Daniel "AloeMantis"

Awesome Einstein pic there :) Hugs 2 all /|

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Comment by Karen Cottle (aka Pallas) These are such wonderful sharings, it's an honour to read. I have nothing to contribute, except love.

Oh...and possibly a song, a very old one - music unites all Comment by Arno Groesbeek When I read this I was deeply moved. I also had a lot of learning problems as a child; had to attend a special class, and I didn’t have a lot of friends either. Throughout my school life I never really was a child who brought home distinctions. When I got older and was in high school I had a series of unexplained odd behavioral fits.

In 2003 when I was in my second year at university I fell ill with bipolar depression, also known as manic depression. It was a truly difficult experience for me, especially the first time, as one doesn’t have a clue what is happening…

Analytically my brain is quite brilliant in areas of language, and some math, but if something doesn’t make sense to me – if I can’t analyse and intuit it, it’s almost impossible for me to learn. Though I’m quite brilliant with language (even creating my own as a hobby, which helps me with spells) spelling is very difficult for me, once again because some spelling can’t be analyzed; if it wasn’t for spell checks I most probably won’t be able to communicate with you guys.

As a child I was diagnosed with autism too, but my mother put her foot down, and refused to hand me over to the mercy of mad men; I’m so glad you, Dark Fyre, also put your foot down. As a child I was hyper intelligent and scored very high on my IQ test. I had a way of seeing things, which few others could really see. I’m still like this today, despite my psychiatric medicine I have to take. I’m glad I retained my unique outlook and way of looking at the world, but the meds numbs me pretty good; I wish I could be rid of them.

Look at it this way: perhaps the world in general is too shallow and

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hollow, and when someone extraordinary is born they try to extinguish them by “normalizing,” them, trying to assimilate them into their ignorance and emptiness. I believe one of the many purposes of adhd children is to wake men up from their mundane slumber. We all have dreams and hopes when we’re young (well most of us in anyway), but when we grow up we stop believing in those dreams and ideals.

We stop believing in justice, we stop loving, we stop fantasizing, and we stop dreaming. Everything begins with fantasy! Everything major we have today is because someone somewhere believed and dreamed. And played. I look at people: so stuck in their daily pattern, unable to answer to or embrace any sort of oddity, so afraid of change; it’s like I’m walking among the dead!

Dark Fyre, you said in your blog that your son talks about these kinds of things. Please do us the honour of sharing with us some of his fresh and unique perspectives. Take heart, you’re a wonderful mother; your story really touched me, I believe your son will make you proud.

Comment by Zazu

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Comment by ··Dark Fyre·· @ Zazou you are right ......and it will be them that will teach us many things...

Comment

by Zazu

Darkfyre...it is our world there is something very very wrong with not these precious children...

Comment by ··Dark Fyre·· @ Nova ohh my dear i could imagine the difficulties you had whilst growing up with dyslexia ,,,and aall the frustrations with just a simple conversation or feeling the pain of embarrassment in class as you are

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told to read aloud....My son has always had a problem with his witting as well and still does and i think always will have..its not dyslexia but his writing is almost impossible to read sometimes...we still have yet to figure out a solution to this and why ....teachers though..... they can be a pain in the arse ...ohh i know that all too well ......just as I'm sure we as parents all do...

I guess whats next is that they want us to come into class and too teach for them? like grrr!

You have been through a lot and i admire you. you are amazing and girl you have a real gift with written word! Just continue what you are doing and your son will be as amazing as you are,,,this is for sure... gawds! i read your reply and yes of course tears ..LOL! As i have said before these children are amazing....... they see so much of what we cease to even look at anymore these days...important little things in life that have more meaning to them, then any words can ever explain....Life is beautiful...They are beautiful! thank you Nova for reading me here ,, for your kind words and your touching story as well...You all are amazing and inspire me! <3 Comment by 路路Dark Fyre路路 @ Raibeart.....first let me say muh gawds! my fingers are killing me and i think my butt has become numb from siting here!.......LOLOL I hasve never typed so much in one sitting ! but i cannot stop!!! whats wrong with me??! lol First i want to say its wonderful that you were able to maintain your friendship with her ,, second i admire her ..... those (others) meaning teachers etc..... can be quite the lil fuggers! i tell ya I know how hard that must have been and To this day at my sons age its still the same ole bullshit! with them!

Im very happy to hear that all things have worked their selves out well for her son....and yes they will survive ...they will do far more then i think we will ever expect....... thank you my dear Raibeart for your kinds words and for stopping in to read me.... It means alot to me.......you are a wonderful soul....you just dont realize how wonderful and how much you are adored! not just by me too but by many!

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((( big hugs)) too you!

Comment by 路路Dark Fyre路路 @ Daniel..... reading your reply really got to me.... that i had to find tissues..lol actually you all made me sit here with tears in my eyes ...but it was for a good reason...a beautiful emotional cry session...A joining of souls each unique with their own stories of experiences ..... You are all beautiful people...

Daniel for years i had battled with doctors about their ideas for therapy of choice for our children.......not that all doctors were bad ,,but some were stubborn and refusing to listen...teachers bah! they were HELL! i hated them and the school and the school systems and iep meetings and whatnot... their were though two teachers whom were awesome and adored my son and he them, both very kewl and a lot like the kids these days.....one teacher had a real tough time letting go and had us all crying at his iep meeting...because she loved him so much.....I raised my son to be who he is...I did opposite of what most parents did i taught him kewl music and styles how to act and dress etc....to me that were a little more important ( for him)....... honour roll would be great to but i wanted him to mold himself into what he wanted to be ..(.he always did good with his grades so i didn't worry about that too much .....) to have that freedom of expression that so many kids cant have ..and with this we became like best buds..he never got into any drugs...never hing with the wrong crowds , still is sort of a loner but content..and with many people whom like him in school and outside as well.. he is going to be 16 this Sept..... soon to drive ack! anyhow my point is life doesn't have to be a struggle for our kids .........right and wrongs....important...school and education as well,,but so is their spirit..... their passions....their very soul... and i understand exactly what you say here Daniel.....just wish others would think more like this as well..and really open their eyes thank you for your supports an d also your story you shares .. you have totally touched a place in my heart...and i have so much respect for whom you are ...and all that you wish to accomplish in this life.... im here for you as well .....you are

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wonderful much love huggs Comment by 路路Dark Fyre路路 @ Karen Cottle...of course it would be an honour....I think its their time to shine .. @ all of you- ( : there are some very severe cases of autism....which could be rather frightening... ((((((that really makes it difficult for the child to do as most people do everyday in life such as reading, writing....communicating....eating , getting dressed etc)))) also there are Some children whom continuously hurt their selves like banging their head on the wall ........ A child that was in my sons school was like this...it broke my heart...I remember every morn when i took the kids to school I would see him there all alone....... whilst other kids stood outside waiting for the bell to ring to go into school..in the morning . This boy would stand facing the wall banging his head against it.... but still...... what really got me was the teachers and everyone else let this happen just left him alone....In stead of maybe distracting him...having him come inside to wait....yes in these cases extensive therapy is needed but also a lot of patience and understanding and someone who really cares and wants to learn what is in this child's mind ..how can they reach them? not just drug him up....I think that in the most severe cases there is another underlying neurologicaL condition which is just as complex or far worse....like my son had adhd.. which eventually just faded out as he grew and rather quickly too he started out badly as well..he wouldn't answer when talked to in school kids would ask him to play a game with him and he would just sit there blank faced and stare behind them..never answering them......noises distracted him like the sound of the heater.........as small

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a sound it were he would hear that over everyone else s conversations .......he would pull his shirt over his head to hide his face and walk around like the headless man..lie on the floor in a fetal position.... flap his hands all over when upset or excited....of course i never knew this at first. with time and phone calls from school i learned....i can go on ...but another time or this will become a book again, and it is only a reply lol....yes somethings he did were a little severe...but....... one day he just stopped! i personally think the greatest therapy for him though was not the drugs..like doctors and teachers believed.......not the years of social skills in the children s hospital but just me being me and me teaching him how to simply be him........i was very honest sometimes brutally....but he needed to hear that... not be babied and not told things about his self and autism and the realities of peoples thoughts ...i told him people are cruel and can be terrible and in his life like everyone else he will meet those type....but as long as he knows whom he is inside believes in himself ...... no one can ever bring him down.......i told him to follow his passions and dreams..... want to learn .. that imagination is one of the most important things for his soul....I taught him kindness.. and hate..... love and respect.... and whilst i were there teaching i also learned a lot about the beauty in life- yes we may see the ugliness in life - but somehow some of the children with autism just don't see it - not at least like we do......honestly his growing up with autism was never a burden...was never anything terrible that i wanna die cause i just cant handle it anymore type of thing.......... He really wasn't harder to raise then any other child would be.......i love him, i adore him, he is a precious gift to life....and to all those he will touch with in his life...he will be as well....... all of these children are it wasn't him that was difficult it were other people....... people who were ignorant to his condition.....teachers doctors (some) etc........I would never change anything about my son ever! i wouldn't ever have wanted another child but him ...he is my life whoa I'm so sorry for the rant again..lol

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Comment by Leila Raven

Comment by Daniel "AloeMantis" I’m feeling deeply touched by these stories :”) Here I’ll share a bit on growing up with some of the same experiences: There was a bit of the early childhood autism as a quiet kid with speech troubles and a solitary nature. I’m on high prescription glasses with eye operations since the daycare years that had me in the ISP classroom. It was very tough to go through, being assigned to the same angry attitude supervisor for seven years, year after year again in a separate classroom. She was a real punisher (kids kept indoors for recess with wrong answers ripped up to be redone) and it was a wonder how things were allowed to go on that way. My parents received phone calls all the

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time about the things I’d done wrong, and on occasion being forced to call them myself and give a confession about unfinished work I was too depressed to care about. So mainly my fear of this teacher is what pushed me into ADD/PDD withdrawal, and we really need to do what we can to raise awareness and stop this from happening, as it still does all the time. My parents were sending me to hospital psychiatry for years based on the supervisor’s story, and now that they hear what really happened, they can only wish they knew more and would have done things differently.

I had slow concentration in some areas, but in others was an avid reader and writer about stories of other worlds that came naturally to me. They would say I had a unique imagination, but didn’t know how to listen, and it sure is a frustrating view of sides there. But creativity is what helped me avoid being put on medication, and I was often being tested for it by separate child therapists I knew as ‘the nice lady’ that came and went. When I’m shown a cartoon picture of a boy on a bridge, it was a choice between throwing him in the lake, or having him look up and dream of another planet.

I agree that there’s a lot of empathic ability in autism. It was my genetic eyesight that first got me sitting at the same table, but being with a few others who have honest physical / mental disabilities with not being able to easily control their emotions – you learn a deep respect for them and become more open to observing everything. It gets difficult later when watching other kids getting into crime and bullying, mainly because of their own struggles with popularity and/or loneliness in a school life constantly raising us to be in competition for the honour roll.

For those in the ISP lifestyle our hardships begin with the frustration of having to sit still and be silenced. It’s hard to understand being empathic early when we’d feel so much emotionally and then be taught to suppress it in silence, as if not to bother anyone with unwanted noise.

Basically childhood forces autistic kids to quiet down by any means, through strict lessons or sedative drugs. Then after that – High school life for the teen is about reversing their shyness with more therapy

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about learning to reopen themselves, but often still with a voice that is conditioned to express only by repeating phrases / words of an attitude continued in the working world of customer service. It’s an unbreakable chain that I do believe us Starchildren are here to sever. Our school system has to change, because kids still don’t have the freedom to be themselves; so at some point the gangs of rebellion are created.

I’m getting passionate here :D I’ve been trying to find a way to say this and will sure be here to support you. The biggest concern we worry about with medication is how it takes the warrior spirit away in numbness – and we will need to learn how to channel the energies of frustration into something productive that the world will listen to. The quiet kid always becomes one of the world’s greatest speakers. There’s an ongoing process of having to radically transform through tough lessons all the time, and yes there can be the panic attacks from taking on too much, and needing to know how to better shield ourselves – now that many of us have found our way into the psychic lifestyle with others going through the same things, and we are learning a lot. All the strength to us. /| ~ Dan / Aloe Comment by RAIBEART Y GATH DDU This is beautiful Dark Fyre.... this is a mother's love at its ever loving greatest. You have shown us a side of your life that just has us loving you even more. Bless you for this..

My ex-girlfriend (we're still good friends) has a son with aspergers syndrome and she went through much the same experiences as you, self-doubt, foolish teachers, misdiagnosis (for years) and separation/divorce on top of it all. Her son, who still has some social issues, is now 17, is nearly finished high school with very good & some exceptional marks, and works in an automotive coop arrangement. He will survive, and he will function as anyone else does. There is light at the end of that tunnel.... and it sounds to me like you're doing a fabulous job. You should be proud.

Love & Hugs

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Comment by Nova Spirit This story was deeply touching. I have never had to handle a child with autism, but I have to deal with dyslexia in my home. I do find it frustrating. Being slightly dyslexic myself, I remember vividly, the struggles with reading and actually speaking. I had to go to speech therapists, because no matter how I heard it in my head, it just never came out right. One of my sons too is showing signs of dyslexia. The teachers, get on my case a lot because he is slow to pick up reading. But boy he is sure bright and excels in areas like math and science.

I do know, this conditions can be worked with. I see myself as living proof of it. I have over come a lot. The thing is, when we sit down and listen to these children, one thing becomes abundantly clear. They thrive on things we take for granted or have just slowly forgotten about.

Things like.. the deeper meaning and understanding of love. More in tune with what is going on around them. Put them in the middle of nature and watch their eyes open up in wonder. Stick them in a crowded street and watch them cover their ears as the input is too much. They learn differently than the normal population of kids. Lots of multisensory teaching.

Thank you for sharing! This is so touching. *hugs* novaspirit Comment by Karen Cottle (aka Pallas) Oh, honey, I have tears in my eyes. It's because of people like you and your son that the world will change.

I was wondering if you would be kind enough to allow me to post this on my website as well as others? I do believe that we need to know more about these beautiful beings who are gracing our world.

Comment by 路路Dark Fyre路路 need there really be a cure? the world of autism is a beautiful thing

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WHAT IS YOUR PERCEPTON OF BEAUTY-By Lady Pandora My friends this was my profile pic on facebook for a little bit. And let me tell you this opened up my eyes to alot of things. Men have a one track mind when they saw this pic, I cant tell you the countless messages and request i gotten cause they thought that was me. I would tell them that is not me but i do have my real pics in my profile. Some where cool with it but others well you know just wanted to have eye candy here they didn't care that she was not a real person. Now as a girl who has self esteem issues yes i have em and this is the first time i have admitted it out loud. I look at my self in the mirror all the time and hate what i see, i know i am not the only one who feels like this and more woman feel like this everyday. And its really hard when you are the odd one out with your friends i am always the one left to hold bags and hold drinks. When i was young i would turn heads cause the girl in the pic had nothing on me. But you know ladies when we have kids our bodies

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change and we become real woman. And i sit and think when i see these beauties what do they have that i dont. And that is just it they dont have what i have all they have is looks and you know beauty is only skin deep. Me i have brains wisdom love and i can say this now and anybody who cant see that its there lose not mine. I used to hide behind a mask i never put pics of me up till a friend of mine and she know who she is told me this "Pan you are flipping hot and if they cant see that oh well you post your pics and show them my beautiful sister" . So i say this to all us real woman its time to stand on our own two feet and change what the Perception of beauty is. If you have curves you are beautiful, If you have a big nose,big butt, tall,short no matter what you have going on the goddess made us this way and trust me she made no mistake when she made us real woman! So ladies stand with me and say " I LOVE ME AND I AM PERFECT JUST THE WAY THE GODDESS MADE ME". And with that said here is me in all my glory and i have come to love me for who i am. Ladies live and know you are loved and you dont need anyone to tell you that you are pretty just look in the mirror and stand in all your glory i did and i love who i see now. Here is a song i know you will love India Arie- Video listen to it and sing at the top of your lungs.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mq86e4Fhja0&feature=artistob&playnext=1&list= TLmaFLYLRqxn4

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About Cultural Differences: By Persephone While this particular article has nothing to do with paganism it does tell us cultural differences and how we perceive comments. This community is made up of various people from all over the world, if you decide to put a comment down on a discussion then you open the door for an observation.

I rarely take comments personally and I have learned to see these cultural differences as a learning process. So many ways to speak, so many ways to look at things and so many ways to learn from this. Paganism should be like this, having a open mind to the possibilities and the differences. There are a few things we all have in common, we all eat, we all sleep, we all were raised by someone other than that variables are immense. Its those variables that make it interesting and diverse, this includes religion, paths, faith, beliefs for myself I am thankful.

Persephone What Paddington tells us about German v British manners Are Germans ruder than the British? Are Britons more dishonest than Germans? Fortunately, we don't have to rely on blind prejudice for answers. Serious academic research has been done on both sides of the North Sea.

'Hallo Mrs Bird,' said Judy. 'How's the rheumatism?'â&#x20AC;?

End Quote This doesn't appear in German editions of A Bear called Paddington There are Britons in Berlin who get taken aback by the directness of Germans. And there are Germans who get really annoyed when Britons

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(and Americans), in an effort to appear friendly, say things they don't really mean. Some Germans call this "lying".

So, what do the experts say on the matter?

Professor Juliane House, of the University of Hamburg, has studied groups of people interacting in controlled situations, watching with academic rigour how they behave as human guinea-pigs.

She found (or verified) that Germans really don't do small talk, those little phrases so familiar to the British about the weather or a person's general well-being, but which she describes as "empty verbiage".

In academic language, this is "phatic" conversation - it's not meant to convey hard information but to perform some social function, such as making people feel good.

The German language doesn't even have an expression for "small talk", she says. It is so alien that in the German translation of A Bear called Paddington - Paddington unser kleiner Baer - it was omitted.

So this exchange of small talk occurs in the English original: "'Hallo Mrs Bird,' said Judy. 'It's nice to see you again. How's the rheumatism?' 'Worse than it's ever been' began Mrs. Bird."

In the German edition, this passage is simply cut.

Might a German talk about the weather, then?

Union flag bedecked fans at Eurovision Song Contest But small talk is a staple of social interaction in the UK "In a lift or a doctor's waiting room, talk about the weather in German? I

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don't think so," she says.

So does that mean the British are more polite? No, just different.

For their part, the British have what House calls the "etiquette of simulation". The British feign an interest in someone. They pretend to want to meet again when they don't really. They simulate concern.

Saying things like "It's nice to meet you" are rarely meant the way they are said, she says. "It's just words. It's simulating interest in the other person."

From a German perspective, this is uncomfortably close to deceit.

"Some people say that the British and Americans lie when they say things like that. It's not a lie. It's lubricating social life. It's always nice to say things like that even if you don't mean them," says House.

Blunt or direct?

For Britons it's German directness that most often gives rise to bafflement or even fury. House, who married a Scouser - a native of Liverpool - gives an example from her own experience.

Continue reading the main story â&#x20AC;&#x153;Start Quote There seem to be one or two problems hereâ&#x20AC;?

End Quote How a Briton might raise a serious concern She would tell her husband to bring something from another part of the house - without the British lardings of "would you mind...?" or "could you do me a favour...?"

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He would hear this as an abrupt - and rude - command.

This gap between German directness and British indirectness is the source of much miscommunication, says Professor Derek Bousfield, the head of linguistics at the University of Central Lancashire, and one of the editors of the Journal of Politeness Research.

There are many documented cases where the British understate a very serious problem with phrases like "there seem to be one or two problems here" or "there seems to be a little bit of an issue with this", he says.

Spectator dressed as Grim Reaper at cycling road race British understatement might note that the Grim Reaper can rather spoil the mood A British listener knows there is a gap between what is said and what is meant - and this can be a source of humour, as when the Grim Reaper's arrival at a dinner party in Monty Python's Meaning of Life "casts rather a gloom" over the evening.

Sometimes it's endearing, or at least the British think it is, as when this announcement was made by British Airways pilot Eric Moody in 1982, after flying through a cloud of volcanic ash over Indonesia: "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. We have a small problem. All four engines have stopped. We are doing our damnedest to get them going again. I trust you are not in too much distress."

But it can also be confusing if you're not used to it.

When BMW bought the British car manufacturer, Rover, it took a while for the seriousness of some of the problems at Rover to sink in. All too often, British managers spoke in euphemisms that their German

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counterparts took at face value.

Beach towels at dawn Both professors reject the idea that one nation's manners are better than the other's. Each has its own rules of communication, or patterns of behaviour, and neither can be blamed, they say, when clashes occur.

Sunloungers on a beach in Mauritius Reserved your sun-lounger yet?

What about those sun-loungers - the seats by the pool, which German holidaymakers allegedly grab at the crack of dawn?

"I think what you've got there is a clash of prototypical German efficiency with the prototypical British sense of fair play," says Bousfield.

House reckons the British do get the sun-loungers in the end, by one means or another.

"The British want the sun-lounger, but they do it differently," she says.

"Are the British devious? Yes, but why should you directly go for something if it doesn't work? Devious is not a bad thing."

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Priest- This movie is the best i have seen in a long time. I even found my self yelling at out loud in this one the action is fabulous. And the eye candy is not bad either. I highly say go out make it a movie night with the loved one and go see this you wont be disappointed. I am going to see it again as we speak. So my friends dont miss it you kick yourself if you do.

Here is the link to watch and enjoy as much as i did..http://www.letmewatchthis.ch/watch-1151949-Priest

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Pirates of the Caribbean On Stranger Tides- What can i say my friends Jack sparrow sails again i love anything that Johnny Depp is in he really brings this character to life. the fact that they where looking for the fountain of youth was very interesting and they even had mermaids in this one love the whole premise of this movie. you need to go see it if you haven't. Here is the link if you want to enjoy it to. http://www.letmewatchthis.ch/watch-2063029-Pirates-of-the-Caribbean-On-Stranger-Tides

The Hangover 2- What can i say about this one i am so a fan of The Hangover Movies this on didnt disappoint me one bit i was lmao through the whole thing. And that dam monkey was priceless. I dont care if the premise is the same as the original this one works these will become cults classics i tell you. The only thing you have to be a fan of the first movie to really enjoy this one. So go out and see this one i am telling you will be laughing as hard as i did and if you need it this one is right up your laugh factory. Here it is the link for you to enjoy it as much as i did..http://www.letmewatchthis.ch/watch-2280191-Hangover-2

Well my friends till next time the box is closed. Tune in next issue when i open the box and bring more fun movies till then Happy watching and smooches all around.

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Born this way -Lady Gaga-Yes my Friends i have fell in to the gaga glamor and i tell you its not bad here. I happen to come across this well its on constant play everywhere, but never paid much mind to it till one song that my daughter kept singing and asked my what it meant to be born this way was. And i told her that means you are happy the way you are and you dont care what no one thinks about you. So i can say yes she may be kinda out there but the message is saying is getting to our kids and that i love. so bravo lady gaga you got me listening and i like what i am hearing. so check it out.....http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wV1FrqwZyKw (born this way video)

otep-Atavist- If you weren't a fan before you sure will be.

This is packed full of head banging beats and just proves why we love this band. The one track i cant stop listening to is I alone just love the whole album. And i know i got a good one when i see my song head bopping along to the music so yeah thumps up. A must not miss.. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dSfNSQ5XMWc&feature=related(I alone ) Muahahaha this is Lady Pandora and hope you love the dark tunes from my evil box keep it tight and i wont bite see you in the dark with more tunes from my evil box...

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MYTHS OF GODS Myths of Gods, published under my alter ego, Leigh M. Lane, is now available in Kindle.

Paperback coming soon.

In a time long before ours, in a place distant yet familiar, an infant God attempts to intervene against humanity's destructive path by making a personal visit. Despite efforts of the people's Elders, who are willing to do anything to hide the truth and safeguard their wealth and power, God comes to the people in the form of five prophets, each the embodiment of one of God's five attributes: life, time, matter, mind, and death.

Vara, raised by a religious Elder, is in denial over her uncanny connection

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with all living things.

Ched, Vara's husband and the town's clockmaker, is unaware that his relationship with time is similarly unique.

Len, alchemist and provider of the town's trading currency, knows he is capable of more than merely turning lead into gold.

Adtom, the carpenter's son and apprentice, leaves a wake of death and destruction wherever he goes.

Jeza is the only one who remembers who they are and why they came.

Unfortunately, not even possessing the embodied mind of God is enough to help her fully understand human nature, and when she and others challenge the Elders' divine interpretations, they find themselves in line for more than just death at the sacrificial stakes.

Myths of Gods takes a critical look at religion through God's eyes, in a story about good, faithful people and the leaders who would use their collective faith to their own ends.

When religion controls the masses, might even God Incarnate be powerless to stop its people's religious leaders from going too far?

Once again we are privileged to be able to feature one of our own writers Lisa Lane has written my wonderful books to date and we are always anticipating her next one well here it is and I most say it was well worth the wait and one I believe you will all agree on.

From the very opening of the book you find yourself captivated and don't want to put the book down, it has been a long time since I have read a book that I just don't want to put down. It is one book that is captivating

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and at the same time your mind is set on a trip wondering and questioning the things we believe to be, but yet trying to say this is just fiction and there is no possible way there could be any truth... With every myth and legend there is some truth within them, and I would like to believe this is true with this book. I do highly recommend this book to everyone you will not be disappointed I know I wasn't and can't wait to own it in paperback for my own personal collection.

I give this book 4 1/2 stars. It is now available to own on Kindle for those that have it and will be available in paperback very soon.

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Ensalada de Bacalo

Ingredients 1 lb. bacalao 1 medium onion (minced) 2 medium potatoes 2 aguacates (avocados) 2 chayotes 1 diced tomato 4 hard boiled eggs (sliced) A sprinkle of "peppa" (pepper)

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Salad dressing* (see below for this) Directions Start by boiling the cod fish and change the water at least 2 times.

Change the water, add the eggs, cubed chayotes, cubed potatoes and boil for 10-15 minutes. DO NOT OVER COOK, IT WILL GET LIKE RUBBER!!

Take out the potatoes and chayotes and run cold water over them to stop them from cooking.

Shred the cod and make sure it doesn't have any bones and set aside.

Meanwhile, peel and slice the eggs while you cube the avocados and put them in a big bowl.

Add the potatoes, chayotes and the shredded bacalao, to the eggs and avocado.

Salad Dressing = 3/4 cup olive oil and 1/4 cup vinegar. Mix well and pour on tossed salad. Sprinkle the "peppa".

Serve immediately and enjoy!!!

Tips For better results, soak the bacalao over night.

Basil Pesto: Basil represents protection and love, so why not whip up a batch of magical pesto? Harvest fresh basil from your garden, add a bit of oil, and serve it over pasta -- or just eat it with a spoon!

Prep Time: 10 minutes Total Time: 10 minutes

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Ingredients: * 8 Cups fresh basil, washed and packed * 1 C Parmesan cheese, grated * 1 C olive oil * 6 cloves garlic, minced * 1/2 C toasted pine nuts or sunflower seeds (optional) * 1 Tbs, lemon juice * Salt and Pepper to taste Preparation: Put all ingredients in the bowl of your food processor or blender. Mix until all the basil leaves are finely chopped. Serve pesto ladled over pasta, or as a dip for cheese and crackers. This recipe makes about two cups, and will last up to a week in your refrigerator -- if you don't eat it all before then!— Persephone,

Basic Flan Recipe The most popular flavor 1 cup sugar 6 large eggs 1 14-oz can sweetened condensed milk 2 13-oz cans evaporated milk 1 tb vanilla Preheat oven to 350°. Prepare bain-Marie and caramelize the mold as per instructions at the top of this page.

Mix eggs with an electric mixer. Add the rest of the ingredients. Blend smooth but do not over mix. Pour custard into caramelized mold, cover with foil, and sit in the baño de María. Then pour hot water into the baño(bath) and into the oven for 1 to 1½ hours until done and knife comes clean

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Member Articles Candle Magick History Posted by Gossamer Wings

Candle Magick History The flickering flame of the candle provides us with a link to the sacred flames that have been kindled over thousands of years. Candles were used in Egypt and Crete as early as 3000 BC and were a feature of worship in many pre-Christian societies. Mostly made of beeswax, because bees were regarded as messengers of the Gods and Goddesses, they are still used in Christian churches today. Beeswax candles are currently popular with many people for magical and spiritual development.

However, you can perform candle magick with white utility candles and it will be as pure and true as if you had followed the lists of color

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correspondences, fragrances and herbs that are most often used. These can add ceremony and atmosphere and create a mood of harmony in which conscious barriers dissolve.

There is something mystical about candles. It is said that we have always practiced primitive candle magick from the time that we were children and blew out our first candles on our birthday cake and made a wish.

Some of the earliest candles were actually oil lamps made of pottery, with a reed or a piece of twine used as a wick. The oil was usually animal oil of some sort.

Later they used hardened fat. Still later, in the 1700's and 1800's, the poor mixed fat with a small amount of wax to create foul-smelling candles.

The wealthy, who could afford beeswax or bayberry candles, had candles that were smokeless and pleasant to smell. Just as we give our workers benefits if we wish to keep them, the better households also offered benefits to their servants. For instance, all servants got one day out a week. Many also were allowed to take any left-over candle stubs for their own use.

Candle magick has been observed for thousands of years, as noted above. The most significant time was when the Catholic church initially began the tradition of burning candles for the dead, or for favors, because many of their parishioners came from pagan backgrounds and used candles for the same reasons. The Catholic church was notorious from compromise in order to strengthen their numbers.

Practioners of Hoodoo, Voodoo, Wicca, Satanism, New Age, and other faiths also use candles ritualistically. The Jews also use candles in traditional ceremonies but they don't use them in a magickal context.

Instead, they use them for symbolism.

In the 1800's, many slaves brought certain traditions and beliefs to

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America with them. This involved the belief that certain colors were effective when asking the spirits or Gods for certain favors. Black was used either for evil or to repel evil, white for purity or as a substitute for any other color, orange for money or strength of purpose, green for success or healing, brown to win court cases or improve a pet's health, red was used for evil or to create passion or to work healing, pink for romance, blue for fidelity and health, yellow for happiness or attraction, and purple for domination. Figural candles also enhanced the spell. Some figural candles used were and are of cats, people, genitalia, celestial signs, and more. Each one serves a symbolic purpose and not always in the way someone would guess.

Candles can add warmth and atmosphere to a special meal or gently soothe us to sleep. They can invoke moments of quiet reflection, or help us to access the deep wisdom that lies beyond conscious thought. They can be used in ritual as a focus for our most powerful dreams, hopes and desires. Candles are not only light, but living fire. When a candle is spent or snuffed out, the light may be gone from our external vision, but that light is not lost; rather it is transformed into radiant beams that fuel the positive energies of the universe and fall as love and healing on those who gaze into a candle flame in sorrow, pain or fear.

Turn off the lights and spend a few silent minutes by candlelight, connecting with the older, slower and wiser rhythms that are not divided into months, years or even millennia, but flow in cycles and release us from the treadmill of time. As you light your candle, you automatically interact with people around the world who light candles or torches. Each candle is part of an interconnected cosmic web of millions of tiny beams, and as you look through the candle flame you may see on the other side someone smiling back at you through their light--a familiar face, someone you have yet to meet, or a stranger--across time and space, an hour, a day, or perhaps thousands of years away.

Candles and the Moon: Candle ceremonies fall mainly under the auspices

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of the moon, whose different phases offer us specific energies. Many times you may want to be aware of the zodiac and planetary placement.

Waxing Moon: The moon is in its waxing cycle as it moves from the new moon to the full moon. As the moon grows or increases, it can give power to all rituals for growth and increase--whether in health, love, knowledge or prosperity. The waxing moon is traditionally the "planting" period, whether for herbs and vegetables or for conceiving a baby. Usually white or pale-colored candles are best for waxing moon rituals, with silver on the day of the full moon. The day of the full moon is very effective for all rituals concerning power, ambition and success, and for climax of endeavors. Full moon energies span from 3 days before to 3 days after the full moon day.

Waning Moon: The moon wanes as it moves from full moon to new moon again. As the visible moon decreases in size, it is reflected in weakening power in human endeavor. As the traditional time for harvesting herbs, etc. or pruning trees, this period is potent for removing negative influences, shedding redundant guilt or resentment, ending destructive relationships, reducing pain or weight and for giving up addictions and compulsions. The waning moon is also good for Scrying. The dark of the moon--the 3 days when the old moon is invisible and the crescent not yet discernible to the human eye--is said to be best for rituals of protection and for any undertaking that involves secrecy. Use darker candles for this cycle.

Superstitions and Beliefs *Always light a candle with your right hand for good fortune. If the candle should go immediately out, however, bad luck will follow. This belief could easily be adapted to a candle spell for luck! *Never singe the base of a candle to make it fit firmly. This brings misfortune. So, for ritual and spellcraft it might be a better idea to melt

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wax into the container and then place the candle within so it's secure. *Allow Yule candles to burn out naturally for blessings and luck. Add this idea to your holiday celebrations. *Never light three candles with one match, or have three candles burning together. This brings mishaps. This is one area where magick differs, as three is a sacred number to the Goddess and represents the triune nature of humankind. *Only a woman named Mary should snuff the candles on Christmas day so the blessing isn't lost. This one isn't overly practical, but interesting! *Give the gift of a bayberry candle on New Year's Eve to friends to whom you wish luck, prosperity, and health. Note that this should be burned completely on New Years Eve for the greatest effect.

Money: If you wish to grow rich, never light a candle from a burning fire.

Use this as a guideline when working prosperity and money magick.

Protection: If it's storming outside, light a blessed candle for safety. most magickal practitioners would likely use a white candle for this purpose, as white is the color of protection. *Lighting a candle at a child's birth, after a death, and on one's birthday affords extra protection from evil. This is a great idea all the way around.

At a birth ceremony, the light honors the spirit of the child coming into this world. At death, it shows the spirit the way out into the next incarnation.

And on your birthday, a candle reminds you of your own light, which should always be honored.

Signs and Omens: *A candle that goes out during a ritual indicates the presence of a restless ghost. Actually, I've often found this to be very true. If a spirit shows up at a ritual it will not, however, be ale to enter the sacred circle without permission. Use your own discretion here, being aware that not all spirits are nice, nor do all of them have good intentions. *In ancient Greece if a girl could blow on a candle flame and the re-spark

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it, she was marked as a vestal virgin and given the task of tending Vesta's sacred fires. Vesta is a fantastic goddess for a candle crafter to call upon for blessings in his or her art. *Candles that burn blue or have wax that forms a winding sheet around the base reveal the presence of spirits. Alternatively some people consider this a death omen. In magick, watching the wax or flame of a candle is a common form of divination, and there are tons of meanings associated with a flame's movements. *If a candle will not light, a storm is coming. This is actually true because of the dampness in the air. *A candle sparking bright portends a letter for the person sitting across from it. *Accidentally knocking a candle over and having it go out indicates a forthcoming marriage in the family. *If a person can revive a sputtering candle it indicates he or she is virtuous and pure of heart. *Seeing a ring in the candle flame indicates and engagement or marriage. *A lump of soot on the wick of a candle reveals that a stranger will soon visit.

Wishes: *The ritual of blowing out birthday candles may have originated with rites for Artemis. The key is blowing out all the candles at once. The smoke that follows carries your wishes to the heavens. This is a great bit of wishcraft that works wonderfully just as it is. Remember, however, that silence is power in this magick. Telling the wish dissipates the energy behind it.

Candle Lore and Superstitions Using a single taper candle to light 2 other candles will draw bad luck.

Lighting a candle from the hearth destines one to poverty. Thin of it as stealing power from the fire that maintains the home.

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3 candles burning in a group signify a wedding or are considered unlucky in theater, especially. This superstition comes from the Christian in which a group of 3 candles were only burnt on the altar.

Difficulty lighting candles means rain is on the way, Once lit, if the flame sputters despite there being no detectable draft in the room, wind is on the way.

A candle that gutters and creates a trail of wax foretells death.

A sparking wick signifies the arrival of a stranger or a letter.

A candle left burning until the very end invite misfortune, except on Christmas Eve when it is traditional to let the candle burning to light the way for the coming infant. In the case of Christmas Eve, the fully burnt candle is said to bring prosperity to the household over the following year.

An extinguished candle that continues to glow is an omen of hardships to come.

Extinguishing a candle by accident foretells a coming marriage.

If a girl walks backward down the steps with a burning candle she will come face to face with her future love.

In America, a candle left to burn in an empty room will cause the death of a relative.

A candle that burns blue, signals the presence of a ghost or of death in some versions.

Always light a candle with the right hand for luck, however, should the candle go out immediately, bad luck will follow.

Bayberry candles given as gifts on New Yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Eve bring good luck, prosperity and health to the recipient.

Smoke from birthday candles send your wishes up to the Gods.

Candles are lit at births, weddings and funerals to chase away evil spirits.

If a person can revive a sputtering candle they are considered virtuous and pure of heart but the French and the German are more specific, believing a sputtering candle can only be revived by a virgin girl.

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What Neo-Pagan Druids Believe Posted by Gossamer Wings What Neopagan Druids Believe (c) 1984 P. E. I. Bonewits Reprinted from "The Druids' Progress" #1 Here's a brief introduction to the basic beliefs that I expect will characterize most members of ADF (a Neopagan Druid organization). These spiritual beliefs are similar to most of those held by other Neopagans (see Margot Adler's book, "Drawing Down the Moon") and the similarities are far more important than whatever specific distinctions of doctrine or ethnic focus there might be between us and other Neopagans. I should also mention that not all Neopagans who consider themselves Druids will necessarily agree with every point of the following list. Nonetheless, these beliefs will be the roots of ADF's polytheology, the source of the spiritual grove we seek to plant.

1) We believe that divinity is both immanent (internal) and transcendent (external). We see the Gods as being able to manifest at any point in space or time, including within human beings, which they might choose, although they may often have their preferences. Often this develops among some Neopagans into pantheism ("the physical world is divine") or panentheism ("the Gods are everywhere"). We tend more towards the latter position.

2) We believe that divinity is as likely to manifest in a female form as it is in a male form, and that therefore women and men are spiritually equal. We insist on a dynamic balance between female and male deities honored and/or invoked at every ceremony, and a strict gender balance in whatever theories of polytheology

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that we eventually develop. We're "liberals" about women's rights and gay rights, but not "radicals;" that is to say, we're unwilling to subordinate all our other principles in order to promote this particular principle. People who wish to make feminism or gay activism the absolute center of all their spiritual activity will probably be happier in other groups.

3) We believe in a multiplicity of gods and goddesses, all of whom are likely to be worthy of respect, love and worship. Sometimes we believe in these divinities as individual and independent entities; sometimes as Jungian "archetypes of the collective unconscious" or "circuits in the psychic Switchboard;" sometimes as aspects or faces of one or two major deities (the "High God/dess" and/or "the Goddess and the Horned God"); and sometimes as "all of the above!" We feel that this sort of flexibility leads to pluralism (instead of monism), multi-valued logic systems and an increased tolerance of other people's beliefs and lifestyles. All of these are vital if our species is ever going to learn to live in peace and harmony amid a multiplicity of human cultures.

4) We believe that it is necessary to have a respect and love for Nature as divine in her own right, and to accept ourselves as a part of Nature and not as her "rulers." We tend to accept what has come to be known as "the Gaia hypothesis," that the biosphere of our planet is a living being, who is due all the love and support that we, her children, can give her. This is especially important in our modern era, when 3000 years of monotheistic belief that "mankind is to have dominion over the Earth" have come close to destroying the ability of the biosphere to maintain itself. Many Neopagan groups refer to themselves as "Earth religions" and this is a title which we believe Neopagan Druidism should proudly claim, and which we should work to earn. Thus we consider ecological awareness and activism to be sacred duties.

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If the ecology, conservation and anti-nuclear movements are ever to have "chaplains," we should be among them.

5) We believe in accepting the positive aspects of western science and technology, but in maintaining an attitude of wariness towards their supposed ethical neutrality. The overwhelming majority of Neopagans are technophiles, not technophobes. We tend to be better scientifically educated than the general population, and thus we have a religious duty to speak out about the economic, political and ecological uses and abuses of science and technology.

6) We share with most other Neopagans a distaste for monolithic religious organizations and would-be messiahs and gurus. Obviously, this places the founders of Neopagan religious traditions in a complex position: they need enough religious authority to focus the organizations they're founding, but not so much as to allow them (or their successors) to become oppressive. Since the pluralistic approach denies the existence of any One True Right and Only Way, and since Neopagans insist upon their own human fallibility, we expect to be able to steer ADF between the Scylla of tyranny and the Charybdis of anarchy.

7) In keeping with this, we believe that healthy religions should have a minimum amount of dogma and a maximum amount of eclectism and flexibility. Neopagans tend to be reluctant to accept any idea without personally investigating both its practicality and its long-range consequences. They are also likely to take useful ideas from almost any source that doesn't run too fast to get away. We intend ADF to be a "reconstructionist" tradition of Druidism, but we know that eventually concepts from nonDruidic sources will be grafted on to our trees. There's no harm in this, as long as we stay aware of what we are doing at every step of the way, and make a legitimate effort to find

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authentic (and therefore spiritually and esthetically congruent) parallels in genuine Indo-European sources first. As for flexibility, Neopagan Druidism is an organic religion, and like all other organisms it can be expected to grow, change and produce offshoots as the years go by.

8) We believe that ethics and morality should be based upon joy, self-love and respect; the avoidance of actual harm to others; and the increase of public benefit. We try to balance out people's needs for personal autonomy and growth, with the necessity of paying attention to the impact of each individual's actions on the lives and welfare of others. The commonest Neopagan ethical expression is "If it doesn't hurt anyone, do what you like." Most Neopagans believe in some variant or another of the principle of karma, and state that the results of their actions will always return to them. It's difficult for ordinary humans to successfully commit "offenses against the Gods," short of major crimes such as ecocide or genocide, and our deities are perfectly capable of defending their own honor without any help from mortal busybodies. We see the traditional monotheistic concepts of sin, guilt and divine retribution for thought-crimes as sad misunderstandings of natural growth experiences.

9) We believe that human beings were meant to lead lives filled with joy, love, pleasure, beauty and humor. Most Neopagans are fond of food, drink, music, sex and bad puns, and consider all of these (except possibly the puns) to be sacraments. Although the ancient Druids appear to have had ascetics within their ranks, they also had a sensualist tradition, and the common folk have always preferred the latter. Neopagan Druids try to keep these two approaches in balance and harmony with each other by avoiding dualistic extremes. But the bedrock question is, "If your religion doesn't enable you to enjoy life more, why bother?"

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10) We believe that with proper training, art, discipline and intent, human minds and hearts are fully capable of performing most of the magic and miracles they are ever likely to need.

This is done through the use of what we perceive as natural, divinely granted psychic powers. As with many other Neopagan traditions, the conscious practice of magic is a central part of most of our religious rituals. Unlike monotheists, we see no clearcut division between magic and prayer. Neither, however, do we assume an automatic connection between a person's ability to perform "miracles" and either (a) their personal spirituality or (b) the accuracy of their poly/theological opinions.

11) We believe in the importance of celebrating the solar, lunar and other cycles of our lives. Because we see ourselves as a part of Nature, and because we know that repeating patterns can give meaning to our lives, we pay special attention to astronomical and biological cycles. By consciously observing the solstices, equinoxes and the points in between, as well as the phases of the moon, we are not only aligning ourselves with the movements and energy patterns of the external world, but we are also continuing customs that reach back to the original IndoEuropean peoples and beyond. These customs are human universals, as are the various ceremonies known as "rites of passage" -celebrations of birth, puberty, personal dedication to a given deity or group, marriage, ordination, death, etc. Together these various sorts of observations help us to find ourselves in space and time -- past, present and future.

12) We believe that people have the ability to solve their current problems, both personal and public, and to create a better world. Hunger, poverty, war and disease are not necessary, nor inevitable. Pain, depression, lack of creative opportunity and mutual oppression are not necessary either. What is necessary is a new spiritual consciousness in which short-sighted greed,

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power-mongering and violence are seen as absurd, rather than noble. This utopian vision, tempered with common sense, leads us to a strong commitment to personal and global growth, evolution and balance.

13) We believe that people can progress far towards achieving growth, evolution and balance through the carefully planned alteration of their "normal" states of consciousness. Neopagans use both ancient and modern methods of aiding concentration, meditation, reprogramming and ecstasy. We seek to avoid being locked into single-valued, monistic "tunnel realities," and instead work on being able to switch worldviews according to their appropriateness for each given situation, while still maintaining a firm spiritual, ethical and practical grounding.

14) We believe that human interdependence implies community service. Neopagan Druids are encouraged to use their talents to help others, both inside and outside of the Neopagan community.

Some of us are active in political, social, ecological and charitable organizations, while others prefer to work for the public good primarily through spiritual means (and many of us do both).

As Neopagan Druids we have the right and the obligation to actively oppose (physically and spiritually) those forces which would kill our planet, oppress our fellow human beings, and destroy our freedom of religion. Also, however, we have a constant need to evaluate our own methods and motives, and to make sure that our actions are coming from the depths of our spiritual beings, and not from petty or short-sighted desires for power.

15) We believe that if we are to achieve any of our goals, we must practice what we preach. Neopagan Druidism should be a way of life, not merely a weekly or monthly social function. Thus we must always strive to make our lives consistent with our proclaimed beliefs. In a time when many people are looking for

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something solid to hang on to in the midst of rapid technological and cultural changes, Neopagan Druidism can offer a natural and creative alternative to the repressive structures of mainstream monotheism. But our alternative will not be seen as such unless we can manage to make it a complete lifestyle -- one with concern, if not always immediate answers, for the problems of everyday life, as well as the grand cosmic questions.

Obviously, there's a great deal more to Neopaganism in general and our version of it in particular. The details of Neopagan polytheology will take years to develop. The section of the "Druid Handbook" dealing with beliefs will consist of statements with commentaries (and even arguments) about the meanings of the statements. The purpose of this format is multiple: to emphasise that there are no final answers to the great questions of human existence; to express clearly that Neopagans can disagree with each other about subtle details of interpretation, while still remaining members of the same religion; and to allow the belief system to grow and adapt to changing cultural and technological needs. Neopagan Druidism is to be a religion of the future, as well as of the present and the past.

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Featured Member Articles Indians say bin Laden code name another insult Posted by OneCrow

By MATTHEW DALY, Associated Press Matthew Daly, Associated Press â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Thu May 5, 4:39 pm ET WASHINGTON â&#x20AC;&#x201C; The U.S. military's use of Geronimo as a code name for Osama bin Laden tarnished the achievement of the raid by insulting an American ethnic group, Native American tribal leaders and advocates told Congress on Thursday.

Comparing the legendary Apache leader to a terrorist and enemy of the United States was deeply insulting and did real damage to Native Americans of all ages, said Suzan Shown Harjo, president of the Morning Star Institute, a Washington-based Native rights organization.

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"It is shocking, really shocking, that this happened," said Harjo, a member of the Cheyenne & Arapaho Tribes of Oklahoma.

Harjo called the incident a painful reminder of a pattern that goes back to the founding of the country.

"Our names are stolen and then we're renamed in order to control us, frankly," she told the Senate Indian Affairs Committee. "My dad was not an enemy when he helped win World War II." Sen. Daniel Akaka, D-Hawaii, chairman of the Indian Affairs panel, said he was dismayed at the use of Geronimo's name in the raid that killed bin Laden.

"This victory has otherwise united our country, and it's unfortunate that this code name was chosen," Akaka said.

The committee had scheduled a hearing on racial stereotypes before the raid that killed bin Laden, but Akaka said the controversy over the code name showed the importance of focusing on institutional stereotypes.

The use of Geronimo's name has appalled many Native Americans and drawn calls for an apology. The 19th century warrior was known for his ability to walk without leaving footprints, allowing him to evade thousands of Mexican and U.S. soldiers, much like bin Laden evaded capture for the past decade.

But for Native Americans, there's an important difference: Geronimo was a hero â&#x20AC;&#x201D; not a terrorist.

Statements of disapproval from tribal leaders, a call for President Barack Obama to apologize, and scores of angry comments on social network sites have surged since the issue came to light this week.

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Jeff Houser, chairman of Geronimo's Fort Sill Apache Tribe, noted in a letter to Obama that the decision behind the code name stemmed from an ongoing cultural disconnect, not malice. But the damage is the same.

"We are quite certain that the use of the name Geronimo as a code for Osama bin Laden was based on misunderstood and misconceived historical perspectives of Geronimo and his armed struggle against the United States and Mexican governments," Houser wrote.

"However, to equate Geronimo or any other Native American figure with Osama bin Laden, a mass murderer and cowardly terrorist, is painful and offensive to our tribe and to all Native Americans."

The White House referred questions on the matter to the Defense Department, which said no disrespect was meant to Native Americans.

The department wouldn't elaborate on the use of Geronimo's name but said code names typically are chosen randomly and allow those working on a mission to communicate without divulging information to adversaries. ___ Associated Press writer Susan Montoya Bryan in Albuquerque, N.M., contributed to this report. photo googled

Animal dreams

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by MoonGoddess Dreaming of Animals Animals in Dreams Dreams with animals in them are usually important.

Animals in dreams symbolize the deeper instincts and vital forces - often repressed. The animals can be helpful or threatening, friends from an earthly utopia or enemies intent upon our demise. Animals in dreams are what we make of them, because they are images of ourselves; representing our passions, anxieties and fears. Animals in dreams can also be mystical or magical bringers of messages, even custodians of our secret inner sanctum. Animals in dreams can also represent powerful people in our lives such as our mother or father. Bat Dreams# The bat is like a defective bird, with its furry, mouse-like body, its membranous wings attached to its fingers and toes, its awkward-looking flight and its extraordinary sonic radar with near sightless eyes; but this silent flying creature of the night can symbolize the dark forces within us. It can represent anxiety, and difficulty in freeing oneself from a disturbed unconscious. It can also represent the dark seething of a soul shackled by fear and incapable of spiritual escape.

Bear Dreams# The bear is an endless source of fascination to children, because it seems good-natured and has a calm, paternal air. It is an important symbol, although it occurs rarely in nocturnal dreams. Certain tribes refer to the bear as the "Master of the Forest", the old black man. Others attribute wisdom to the bear. Above all, the bear symbolizes elemental strength, the power of the unconscious, but also the unforeseeable, the capricious violence and wildness that often constitute our negative shadows. In children's dreams, the bear frequently stands for paternal or maternal authority depending on whether the bear is male or female.

Bird Dreams#

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Birds often represent spirituality and being above earthly matter, because they are always associated with the sky in waking life — especially larks, swallows, songbirds or brightly colored birds. Although they can represent the higher levels of consciousness, they can also serve as sexual symbols, or as symbols of the anima.

Are your dream birds colorful, active, lifeless or solitary? Are they wounded? Obviously a crow and a humming-bird will have completely different symbolism of their own. A bluebird is a symbol of hope, happiness and rebirth. A white bird represents simplification and internal harmony. The dove represents peace, and so on. Everything depends on the context of the dream, but in general the symbolism of birds is fairly simple. Caged birds The caged bird represents one’s spirit and intelligence being locked up inside, unable to be free, instincts that are held back by fear. A flock of birds A dream with flocks of beards represents a need to be set free amongst others, to share your spirit and intellect with those around you.

Bull Dreams The bull is the focal point of many religions throughout the ages, it’s symbolism is therefore important. Bulls are bound to life and to death. In most dreams, they are seen maddened, pawing the ground, snorting, and insuperable. Then it is a devastating beast, and again one must discover whom or what it represents in this or that dream.

The bull also represents the animal nature in man - instinctive, bonded to the earth and the sun, virile, potent and with powerful senses. Jung says of the bull "The sacrifice of the bull represents a desire for a spiritual life; such a life would allow a man to triumph over his primitive animal passions and thus, after an initiation ceremony, to attain enlightenment and peace.”

A sentiment that is easily recognized in the Spanish bullfights to this day; love them or hate them, there is no doubting their fascination, with their matadors in embossed and sequined suits shining with light, representing the triumph of mind over might, spirit over instinct. In dreams too, the killing of a bull can thus represent the need to eliminate "the beast" within us.

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In other dreams, a bull can symbolize the angry father; a connection with the Oedipus complex. If, then, the bull is put to death, the son "kills" (eliminates) the father, and thus enjoys the exclusive love of his mother.

Sometimes, of course, the bull is the animal symbolizing instinct and strength, but also enjoyment of life and of nature but it can represent the shadow. In this case, it is highly likely that the bull serves not only as the shadow but also as the dreamer's "light", because her or his instinctive life has been repressed.

Cat Dreams Human feeling towards the cat has a kind of duality, they are beautiful yet secretive, household pets that roam the night in places we’ll never know about. They are gentle , affectionate and loyal, yet have a reputation for treachery and secrecy and aloofness – while also being wise. There are those who cringe from the very touch of the cat; while others like to live surrounded by whole colonies of cats.

In Cambodia the cat is credited with the ability to produce rain; in ancient Egypt the cat was venerated for its speed, agility and muscular strength.

Popular superstition has its own contribution to make to the cat's mystique. A black cat usually symbolizes good luck, but if a black cat crosses your path it is an omen of bad luck. In many traditions, black cats symbolize death. Dreams in which cats feature can also have widely different meanings, depending on the emotions which the dreamer projects on to the animal. The feline and the feminine are often synonymous. The cat's mysteriousness, sinuosity, watchful eyes, savage and capricious release of tension are all attributes commonly ascribed to women, or femininity, usually pejoratively, in dreams.

Crocodile Dreams The crocodile is a fairly regular visitor to people’s dreams. It is an archaic symbol of the lower depths of our unconscious minds. The crocodile looks antediluvian (before the biblical flood), something from the mists of time. It is therefore not surprising that it can also represent ancestral wisdom.

That is why, in certain cultures, it is credited with qualities of light or

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illumination.

Above all, however, the crocodile is the monster of silence and immobility, of brutal, lightning-fast attacks.

It is the crocodile that drags its prey to the bottom of the water, beyond help. It can represent the evil eye and destiny.

The crocodile lurks, invisible, in its watery world. It resembles the dragon and other beasts that come to us from the depths of time. Capable of submerging and destroying - for it is a killer - it can symbolize the grand master of life and death.

Among Western people, dreams featuring crocodiles almost never evoke agreeable sensations. One must always look into the great depths of the unconscious, and seek out those people whom the dreamer feels to be malign destroyers of his or her personality.

Crow Dreams Crows, ravens and rooks are popularly considered to be birds of all augury, presaging death and disaster. The crow's cry and color can easily be associated with frustrated or anguished souls.

The crow is a social creature, noted for its social structures. It can, in fact, be a bearer of excellent tidings. In Japan, the crow is the divine ambassador. In the biblical book of Genesis, the crow was sent out of the Ark by Noah to discover whether the earth had reappeared after the flood.

The crow is a perspicacious bird. Symbolically, it knows the secrets of life and death. It is the bird of witches and sorcerers. Among certain tribes the crow is itself the magician who organizes the world.

The crow is blessed with a vast catalog of symbolic associations. In dreams, it can stand for voluntary solitude, spiritual retreat and hope; or, on the contrary, it can possess sinister qualities â&#x20AC;&#x201D; as the announcer of impending inner troubles.

Cuckoo Dreams To dream of a cuckoo is very rare. It can of course symbolize a sense that one is a parasite, unwelcome, getting under someoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s feet, or that one has taken someone ease's place. In such cases, the cuckoo signals

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guilt and feelings of inferiority. It can also serve as a symbol of possessiveness, with the agonizing jealousy that accompanies it.

Deer Dreams When one thinks of deer you canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t help but think of innocence and big doe-eyes. The deer (the hind or doe) is above all a feminine symbol that often appears in women's dreams. The deer represents a feminine part of the dreamer that is yet to develop into the mother. The deer represents a femininity that is too "pleasing", too "fearful". The feminine aspect that this symbol represents does not come with the authority and power, which only comes from leaving the mother and striking out alone.

Dog Dreams The dog is a best friend and a loyal companion, Fido (Latin. I trust/I am faithful); the dog represents fidelity at all costs. The dog is instinct, but there is significance too in its capacity to track and trail, to experience things that are beyond our limited senses.

The dog's symbolism extends much further than these elementary characteristics suggest. The dog, of course, is a guardian â&#x20AC;&#x201D; a guard-dog or the guardian at the gates of hell. It leads us through the darkness of death, as it leads the blind. Many mythologies associate the dog with the underworld, and with companionship beyond the grave. It is the guardian of sacred places. Among certain peoples, a dead man is always buried with his dog, which will lead its master to heaven. The dog can be a solar â&#x20AC;&#x201D; or even a maternal symbol.

Eagle Dreams Ruler of the sky, the eagle is supposed to look at the sun face to face. It is a symbol of power and invincibility. A solar bird, it is often compared to lightning. The eagle swoops down on its prey, strikes, pierces and carries it away. Eagles and other birds of prey appear in many of our dreams; symbolizing inner spirituality or self-attainment, though from a passive viewpoint, they can also represent anxiety at being "pierced" or torn apart anxiety at castration and a crushing of the personality. To be watched or

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spied on by an eagle often means that feelings of guilt give us a sense of being "seen through" by others, being unmasked, being watched by people we regard as superior to us. There are dreams about an eagle being killed. This death symbolizes the destruction of an ideal or an illusion, or even the sense of having missed out on life.

Fish Dreams Fish belong to the realms of water and often represent the unconscious, the inner, deeper life. They can also stand for that which we must "fish for" in ourselves, in order to bring the light of the conscious into the depths of the unconscious and dredge up all which has silted up there. Fish sometimes reflect the colored light of rivers, but they also glide in the silent shadows of the ocean.

Horse Dreams Horses and humans have been together far longer than records tell, they appear in many peopleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dreams and have done almost as long as people have dreamed; there are so many symbols associated with horses in dreams it can be difficult to know where to begin, but it helps to look at all the things we think of when considering horses: The horse jumps, gallops, paws the ground, charges, crushes and tramples. For many people, the horse is "the son of night". It brings life and death. It is also, however, a solar animal, and pulls Hyperion's chariot (the sun). The horse is ridden by warriors and gods. It is at the center of the Apocalypse, destructive, but linked to the purifying fire. The horse carries on its back warrior-knights bringing justice as well as the ravaging hordes who bring death and destruction.

In dreams the horse is often a messenger of death, or the crushing of the personality - and, of course, its possible rebirth.

It is the dream image of instinct, wild or tamed. The horse is easily frightened, capricious, unpredictable, wild; we try to break and tame them.

In certain dreams, man and horse act as one â&#x20AC;&#x201D; an image of accord between the conscious and the unconscious, an image of harmony in the personality. Here, color can be of particular importance. The black horse

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can be a messenger from Hell and anguish; the white horse can allow us to ride towards our own rebirth. As for the pony, it can represent the growing vital force, the potential for extroversion and the zest for life.

Owl Dreams As a bird of the night, the owl has taken on symbolic overtones of solitude and melancholy. Superstition has intervened to make the owl a bearer of bad news. However, the owl can also be a symbol of higher knowledge: in certain dreams, the owl announces important changes in the dreamer's personality because it is thought to know the dark regions of the unconscious.

In other dreams, we find the owl acting as protector and guide in the night of the unconscious.

The owl also symbolizes wisdom. This may explain the popularity of owls as ornaments in so many modern houses.

Snake Dreams Snakes are linked with many opposite symbols, snakes in dreams represent whatever is dark and obscure in us. The snake or serpent belongs to the underground, invisible world. It dwells in crevices, in dark holes in the ground, but it darts out with lightning speed to strike. The snake can suffocate or poison its prey, swallow and digest it. Thus the snake is one of the most important archetypes in the human soul.

Worshiped or hated, it has been represented thousands of times in art, and is the guardian of secrets and temples. The serpent is the great tempter, but it also represents knowledge and wisdom. The snake Caduceus is the symbol of Western medicine and healers. It is a universal sexual symbol, an erect and phallic image. Snakes will probably always retain their contradictory symbolism, exerting their fascination and provoking cries of fear and revulsion.

Spider Dreams Spiders are usually thought of as creatures to fear in the Western world, where others see spiders as very positive creatures. In India the spider is

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an important symbol in cosmology. The shape of a spider's web recalls the sun that it reflects, and the spider spins its web in secrecy as the sun hides away its rays. In some African cultures it is thought that spiders created the material that people are made of and the stars, the Sun and the Moon. To the Ashanti, the spider is a primordial god that created man.

The spider creates its web from material within itself, making it an important dream symbol; making it privy to the secrets of life, the past and the future.

For people in the West though the spider is generally thought of as negative in dreams, because there has been a dislike for spiders indoctrinated into the culture. The negative spider Dreams in which the spider is a negative image see the creature with two aspects, the spider itself and the web that it weavesâ&#x20AC;Ś The spider makes a trap, it waits for its victim, it tangles its quarry in its web, sits perfectly still in the middle of its snare but is always ready to attack with lightning speed.

The spider can be a symbol of a bad mother when considered in a negative way; smoothing the child and keeping it trapped for her self; in this case the spider represents the death of the personality. People that have suffered life with a bad mother will often dream of spiders in this way, especially if the unfortunate person is a woman herself; making the spider a representation of the evil wicked witch.

This creature in dreams can also represent the spider woman, the femme fatale that lures men to their doom with cunning and trickery; often appearing in the dreams of men for whom the negative anima has remained a disruptive force. The spider can also be a symbol of oneself; when this is the case it represents being overly obsessed with the self, with ones own appearance, putting oneself at the centre of everything like the spider in its web. The positive spider Sometimes spiders can appear beautiful in dreams, be different colours or pure white; the beauty being astonishing because of the fear usually attached to the creature, with pretty morning dew drops or frost making its web sparkle like rainbows or stars.

The main symbols in a dream like this are that the spider was white and that there were drops of dew or water; the white of the spider counteracts

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the normal negative impact of the blackness usually associated with spiders, whiteness can represent purity and the opposite of menace.

Dewdrops can glow like pearls and reflect rainbow hues representing the ascending spirit.

Wolf Dreams The wolf has a somewhat poor reputation in Western mythology, ‘Little red Riding Cap/Hood’, the proverbial ‘Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing’ et cetera. It only needs one wolf to be on the prowl for shutters to be put up and people to tremble. It is not the supposed murderous tendencies of the wolf that provoke one’s fears; it is an almost sacred terror, an old dream deep in the collective unconscious. It seems that this dream has to do with a supposed understanding between wolves and men in a long-lost paradise. The wolf is charged with a vast range of symbolic values, and the dreams in which it appears are always felt to be powerful and consequently important.

The wolf is perhaps purely "the beast", which appears from nowhere, wreaks devastation, and vanishes without trace, leaving carnage in its wake. In mythology, its role is sometimes benevolent, sometimes satanic.

The wolf sees in the dark, so is symbolic of light and the sun. The wolf can be the solitary hero who defies the hunters. It is a symbol of intelligence and courage, but it is also the devourer of children, the werewolf, a demon from Hell.

In dreams, the wolf acquires the importance that we attribute to it. It is often a part of the self, positive or negative. It can represent solitude and self-absorption, and retreat from relations with others, but it can symbolize instinct too; the instinct that certain people can only keep locked inside.

The wolf can also represent a "devouring" character that we carry within us, a father or mother for instance. It often represents a social character of this nature, for a man may be "a wolf towards other men or women, but a wolf seldom behaves badly towards other wolves.

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Featured Member of the Month

Sweet Dark Angel

This is by far one of the best sites I have joined on ning, and I've been on quite a few trust me on that one. A lot of times, you will see them stealing members, groups, ideas from each other. However, Pagan UnderWorld is such a different scene altogether, so packed with great information, And great people! The admin definantly rocks I have been really enjoying getting to know the people here.

When I log in, I like to see the latest discussions, blogs but especially the images, as I'm a graphic~aholic and always on the lookout for great new images to play with. I like to see who responds to my comments made, and generally just drop in on some friends through the skysa bar.

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(best way to corner people fyi LOL.) As far as my own beliefs, I was raised catholic and found it to be so depressing and controlling. I had a hard time believing that we are meant to be slaves to some God who would spend all his time watching our every move so that he could write it down or record it somewhere just so he could punish us with fire and brimstone, or sentence us to eating our own flesh for all eternity.

I believe we are all born with the knowledge of what is right from wrong, and sometimes we grow to learn to make excuses for ourselves and others around us...in the end we make our own hell or heaven.

I believe we do get what we will to be, being, what we spend our time and energy into. This might not always be the case, as we always get curveballs thrown at us, in the end it is how we deal with these curve balls that make us who we are. But I do believe those curve balls are thrown at us for a reason, either to help us to grow, to help someone in the future, and sometimes just to help prepare us for something that might be coming down the road.

I have been in a very dark place lately, but thanks to a friend, am starting to realize, that i have been treading water, getting nowhere, when what i need to do is see the lesson in what i'm dealing with, find the strength to find the solution, or just become stronger by dealing with the fact that maybe there is a solution I have overlooked. Basically, I'm going through this for a reason and feeling sorry for myself will do nothing but make me more miserable. favorite quotes? well how about a poem by Sandra Sturtz Hauss May you find serenity and tranquility

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in a world you may not always understand.

May the pain you have known and the conflict you have experienced give you the strength to walk through life facing each new situation with courage and optimism.

Always know that there are those whose love and understanding will always be there, even when you feel most alone.

May a kind word, a reassuring touch, and a warm smile be yours every day of your life, and may you give these gifts as well as receive them.

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May the teachings of those you admire become part of you, so that you may call upon them.

Remember, those whose lives you have touched and who have touched yours are always a part of you, even if the encounters were less than you would have wished.

It is the content of the encounter that is more important than its form.

May you not become too concerned with material matters, but instead place immeasurable value on the goodness in your heart.

Find time in each day to see beauty and love in the world around you.

Realize that what you feel you lack in one regard

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you may be more than compensated for in another.

What you feel you lack in the present may become one of your strengths in the future.

May you see your future as one filled with promise and possibility.

Learn to view everything as a worthwhile experience.

May you find enough inner strength to determine your own worth by yourself, and not be dependent on another's judgment of your accomplishments.

May you always feel loved.â&#x20AC;?

See ya around the UnderWorld ~SDA

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Featured Groups

Shamanism Created by Bliden http://paganunderworld.com/group/shamanism

In this group I will do my best to explain the aspects of shamanism and the ways I practice.

NATURE SPIRITS AND DEDICATIONS Oftentimes as a shaman or healer we take form somewhere to get our power and use it to heal others. Well what you take you must give back. it is the balance of the Shaman. When Nature or nature spirits are involved we work with and befriend them and never do we take advantage or use them for nefarious purposes.

Gift giving is important when dealing with these spirits. They are wise and have literally centuries and millenia of experience. They make wonderful teachers, guides and even guardians at times should we choose to listen.

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A perfect example is that of a tree. When you wish to pray to a tree spirit or dryad you would give it water. This is a representation of showing love and respect before you ask for this particular spirits help. It not only shows for that tree, but for all trees in general that you mean no harm and that you are indeed a shaman and a keeper of the nature around you. Also being a Shaman means giving thanks from the heart or from within. If you ask nature for help and you get a help then be respectful and courteous and say thank you. Not only for listening if you should talk, but for helping when you asked for it.

Also when you walk in nature dont be afraid to do things rather on spot.

Pick up garbage, clean the area around you, garden, keep your yard clean, planting new trees. These are acts that ask nothing in return and nature, as well as the spirits see this as a loving act of respect for them and for the environment. Giving also means that we know the earth is our mother, just as the sky is our father. We must honor them both with love and respect. Give back and remember to show your dedication not only when your help is given , but just in general.

To be a shaman is to know love, honor and respect..not just for nature and the spirits, but the environment and all its creatures. Plant and animal.

I mentioned briefly earth, but you may also call on air, fire and water as well...each with its own dedications and ways of caring for it. Protect the earth and the air as they are our father and mother. Know and love the elements for they are part of creation.

Native America Connection Created by Persephone

http://paganunderworld.com/group/nativeamericanconnection

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Native American Spirit Members: 41 Latest Activity: 2 hours ago

Mitakuye oyasin! We are all related! It isn't too late. We still have time to recreate and change the value system of the present. We must! Survival will depend on it. Our Earth is our original mother. She is in deep labor now. There will be a new birth soon! The old value system will suffer and die. It cannot survive as our mother earth strains under the pressure put on her. She will not let man kill her. The First Nation's Peoples had a value system.

There were only four commandments from the Great Spirits: 1.Respect Mother Earth 2.Respect the Great Spirit 3.Respect our fellow man and woman 4.Respect for individual freedom We must all stand together as a force of love. Be united NOW. There is only one way. Communication. Knowledge. Arm yourself with truth, love and perseverance. Extend your family. Join with others in giving. We are all related. People of the earth take back your heritage. I am not speaking of skin color or religion. Our heritage is this earth... Our heritage is also extended beyond this earth into the heavens where the spirit once lived before our birth into this world. You are bound to both.

THE TEN INDIAN COMMANDMENTS! Treat the Earth and all that dwell thereon with respect!

Remain close to the Great Spirit Show great respect for your fellow beings Work together for the benefit of all mankind!

Give assistance and kindness wherever needed Do what you know to be right Look after the well-being of mind and body

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Dedicate a share of your efforts to the greater good Be truthful and honest at all times Take full responsibility for your actions.....

FULL MOON PRAYER We thank the Moon and the stars, who give us their light when the Sun retires.... We thank the Great Spirit, incarnation of all kindness, who directs all things for the good of Its children." —from an Iroquois prayer

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Featured Member Articles The Seven Scrolls of The Black Rose (Children of The Black Rose Scroll #3)

THE GLEANING

Now that you've opened all the boxes in your mental attic and brought everything to light, transferring everything possible to your journal, you'll probably find certain aspects of your life that still disturb you. Most bad memories have, by the simple act of looking at them, blown away on the wind, and can no longer hurt you, for you have faced them and spit in their

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eye. However, the exposure to certain other unpleasant memories has probably left you unsettled. You are no different than most people who have glossed over certain past events, rattling your sabers at them in hopes they would go away. Most did. However, now you must deal with those that didn't.

The next step is a real kicker. As always, you must do it all by yourself, accomplishing the feat alone, uninterrupted. Sitting alone atop a lonely mountain with the wind in your hair is traditional, but any quiet place where you will be undisturbed will do. Yes, we are talking about reflection. Not only are we talking about reflection, we are talking about total remembrance. Not only are we talking about total and complete remembrance, we are talking about an absolute gleaning of your memories. In olden times, after a field was harvested, the gleaners passed through, picking up any grain that had fallen or was missed by the pickers. The gleaners were hungry, and missed little. Be a better gleaner and miss nothing!

We are talking about sitting down and forcing all memories to the surface, no matter how painful. Even the memory of Uncle Harry taking you into the closet when you were a kid must hit the sunshine. Even if was you who took Uncle Harry into the closet, recount it anyway. Every candy bar you ever stole must be reviewed as well as every positive deed. Do not bypass the positive memories either, as they must be carefully examined as painful or hurtful experiences tend to hide within their folds. Begin turning the pages of your life backwards from today until you feel the slap of the doctor's hand at birth. Travel further if you can.

Remember, don't leave anything out of your examination as there might be a pin cushion hidden within a pillow, and you might just sit on it. This process is for your benefit only.

No one else need ever know anything about your fables and follies. They are yours, and you must deal with them. You are responsible for your own actions, and you must act in your own best interest, ridding yourself of all dead weight. Most adepts find that they have done more right than wrong.

The suffering incurred by most brothers and sisters, far outweighs their mistakes. Here is wisdom; the purpose of your personal recounting is to

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place your mental "Feet" on solid ground, understanding that everything has a price, and you have pay it. The object here is ending up owing nothing to anyone and restoring your soul to balance.

The result of all this mental thrashing around will be a near spotless mental environment as most of the junk memories are now transferred out of your mind and written in your journal. Now once your memories are transferred to your journal, there is no further use or purpose in remembering them. So, let them go. The floor of your mental attic should be fairly clear by now, but once you are down to the most pertinent items, the ones you really have to deal with, you have a little accounting to do.

THE BALANCE SHEET

As with any other asset and liability sheet, apply your own positive actions that you have done to the left column, and list your mistakes on the right.

When you have done a full and honest recounting to the best of your ability, add up both columns, subtract the lesser from the greater, and you will have your true disposition. Most of the time, brothers find themselves on the asset side of the page. Should you find otherwise, see lesson one, hit the street, find those worse off than yourself, then bring yo ur sheet into balance by your own hand. You'll know when you've done it right. Just don't get silly about it.

Do you have a debt you can't pay? Then send a letter of apology, explaining the circumstances and asking the lender to forgive the debt. If you wish, send them a penny on the dollar. If the lender won't forgive the debt, then it is his problem. It is better not to lend or borrow as a loan is only a gift with strings attached, and the lender knew the risk when he made the loan. Mark the debt paid in your journal. You have done all that you could. Do you feel guilty at leaving a close friend and moving on with your life?

Consider that the other person has no right to control you anyway. They can't even control themselves, how can they hope to control another? That

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amounts to slavery, and slavery is illegal. There is no apology needed.

When it is time to go, it is time to go!

By the way, letters of apology do not need to carry a return address or even come from the town in which you currently reside. The point is that you are doing something positive to settle a matter in your own mind. Did you steal a candy bar? Give a candy bar. Did you take a life? Save a life.

Do not forget that helping a stranger in need will settle many debts, and they do not even need to be of like substance. Balance is the key. As you deal with each and every memory both good and bad, right or wrong, mark its disposition next to it in your journal. When you pay a debt, mark it "Paid in full". When you settle a score, mark it "Settled". And when you have done all you could to set things right, mark that item "Canceled". So it is written, so it shall be! Out of mind, in the book, close the book. You have made an honest effort to settle your life, and the rest of the world will just have to live with it. Declare bankruptcy if you must, but clear out your mind and start fresh.

Once you have brought all of your life up to date and have figured out just what has happened, you may deal with the rest of your life on a day-to-day basis. You'll keep your journal up-to-date and have a running total of your whole-self balance sheet. You will have discovered your strengths and weaknesses and will be better able to deal with them in the future. That is the whole point. The object here is to be mentally bullet proof. The opposition will hate you, but oh well. Adepts don't kid themselves or anyone else. That is why we say that a brother or sister is neither good nor evil. No one is either all positive or all negative. There is a little negative in the best of us, and a little positive in the worst of us. Anyone who claims to be pure as the driven show is a liar. It's as simple as that.

Here is wisdom: do not set impossible goals, for only a fool would cast himself into an impossible role. It is better to remain centered and balanced, answering to the call of reason being neither good nor evil and satisfied with that outcome. However, Adepts have to live with themselves and have an interest in growing spiritually. Therefore, they tend to consider their actions and their effects on themselves, others, and society as a whole. Maintaining their whole-self balance sheet on the asset side

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becomes second nature, and they become stronger with each passing day. So will you!

"There are those who constantly fail in their purpose. Of course, the question arises as to why.

The answer always is that they didn't believe in themselves."

THE REST OF LIGHT

Resting the mind and receiving illumination. For ten minutes each morning upon rising, and ten minutes before retiring, at night, practice the Rest of Light. Ask the Force that light and understanding be granted you this day.

Then, after waiting for your answer, you may ask for more specific understanding or revelation. Here is one of the best ways to chip away at problems and seek answers. Asking only takes a moment. Then, use the quiet time following to listen for your answers. Spend more time listening than asking.

What purpose to ask for an answer and then not listen for it? This is the first and perhaps the most important exercise for receiving the Gnosis.

Few can hold on for 10 minutes. Most drift off to sleep long before.

Naturally, the best way to deal with it is to build up to it slowly. Keep on increasing your ability to focus a few seconds at a time until success is your. Not only will this exercise increase your probability of receiving Gnosis, but it will strengthen your ability to concentrate and execute a forced listening. The most difficult aspect of this is hovering on the verge of consciousness and oblivion without expending effort. It's something like having a dream and being able to consciously interact with it and remember it. Mental juggling is something you have to work up to in easy stages.

This little ten minute period has another value: often, when we sleep our

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spirit leaves our physical bodies to travel about on its own business or adventure. Have you ever wakened with a start or with a bad feeling as though you weren't put together quite right? This happens. The cause is most generally that yo ur spirit, probably traveling faster than the speed of light sprang back into your body and missed. Often the spirit enters the body so fast that it doesn't quite align itself properly. Sometimes, it even enters upside down. This jars you awake and the resulting condition is you feel like you've been on a jag or worse.

Holding still for a few moments allows the poor thing to right itself. Should you fail to give it time to recover, you'll feel off all day. If you do get up and still feel off, lie back down for a few more moments, and you'll feel better for it. In any case, before getting up and facing the day, take time to assess your mental and physical condition. Also, take inventory of your assets so that you are prepared for any eventuality. After all, there is no sense in going off half cocked.

An important aspect of the morning rest of light is that often, answers to the questions of the night before will materialize during this period. Often, it takes a while to bring something up from the depths of consciousness.

Moreover, many times the subconscious mind reacts badly to the truth, and it takes time to find an acceptable method of delivery.

That is why a valid answer will at times surface in symbols or metaphors or some other kind of surrealistic nonsense. When this happens, just keep on working on it. Write it down in your journal and continue trying to make sense out of it. I've had the experience where I've carried around a blur of an answer or concept for weeks, only to have it pop into focus when I least expected it to materialize.

KNOW YOURSELF

Take the time to get acquainted with yourself. We know that sounds odd, but few students have ever paid enough attention to their thoughts and actions to actually have any insight into themselves. Often others know the

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student far better than she knows herself. That means that they can predict how she is going to act and react better than she can. That is why people develop what is called a reputation. People are known by the way they conduct themselves and handle situations as well as their skills. That is why we admonish student brothers and sisters to monitor their thoughts and edit them before they pass into existence. Even though an idea seems like a fine one at the time, examine it carefully before acting upon it. Try to see if it can backfire on you, causing pain to yourself and those around you. After all, the idea is yours, and you may give it birth or bury it. The choice, oh creator is yours. Therefore, consider well your words and deeds.

Words are like small seeds; once cast upon the wind, they cannot be called back. Deeds are stronger yet, for they have a toehold in the here and now. An idea can arrive in a blink, be executed in a flash, and take years to undo. Here is wisdom: the closer an adept draws near to the Force, the better their ideas become.

This lesson is especially important to the serious magician as acting upon whim when performing in the circle can bring unexpected results. There is much upon the Astral planes that is not on your side. Your opposition would relish the opportunity to cream you where you stand. Another way to look at it is that you want maximum return on your magical efforts.

Anything else is mediocre.

AN ATTITUDE PROBLEM

Attitudes are really mind sets. Some are bright and happy, some are cynical and some are pretty bleak. They are also habitual and can be easily improved one way or the other. There are those of us who have an attitude problem, and therefore lead miserable lives.

This shows a lack of discipline and self control and is nothing to be proud of. The side effect of this aberrant condition is that such persons are inherently unhappy and make everyone around them miserable in their

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turn. Naturally, as time turns around, the victims tend to retaliate, and the problem is compounded. It is said that we are the sum total of all our experiences. Unfortunately, the experiences of some folks are worse than others, a lot worse. However, one of the great truths is that THOUGHTS CHANGE THINGS. You create your own environment with your thoughts. It is all in how you look at it. Realize that your happiness and the happiness of those in your circle of influence depends upon how you look at a give n situation or a series of events. Here is wisdom: a mind set can develop into a life set. "The mold must first be created before an object may be cast in it."

Another way to look at this truth is if you don't like the object, change the mold. Human beings are ever malleable and can be changed either from the inside or the outside.

Adepts are spiritual warriors, and any warrior in order to survive must always be cognizant of his or her mental and physical condition. He or she also must always be aware of his or her assets. Should a brother or sister have an attitude problem, he or she likely won't have many assets.

Positive thoughts concerning yourself and others will produce positive results, and negative thoughts will result in just the opposite. Usually, people's thoughts are mostly about themselves and how they are being treated. Be it known to you that any negative thoughts will cause disastrous results. On the other hand, positive thoughts will bring satisfaction and happiness into your reality. Now try to expand your thinking to include others and their welfare, but do it in a very positive manner. Remember: learn to pay attention to your thoughts, for the thoughts you dwell on today will surely later manifest themselves in your own reality. You are an accident waiting to happen until you become aware of the power in your thoughts. Your attitude is important: any task you approach or any transaction you make or any interaction you have with others in this realm or the next will most certainly be affected by your attitude and how you present yourself and your ideas. A bad attitude is like a cloud of stink, and it will follow you, permeating all you touch until you rid yourself of it. In other words should your attitude be negative, dark, evil or selfish, failure will loom upon your horizon. On the other hand, if your

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attitude is open, light, fair and honest, your chances of success are greatly increased. We don't say assured, because you may just have a less than perfect idea. If you do, it will become increasingly obvious.

Have you ever wondered why some people seem to be lucky, enjoying the best fruits from the tree of life while others receive only the culls? The answer is that the so-called lucky ones have a lucky mind set. They have painted a great, wide, wonderful world for themselves, and they live in it. They are creators of reality, their reality. Adepts are all creators, and they begin creating their world each day, toward the end of their Rest of Light. They think over what has happened and then think about what will likely happen.

Next, they engineer the best outcome possible, trying several likely possibilities until they find the one that fits best. They learn from all past experiences and consider what might well have happened if they had acted differently, for they know that each event may have several endings.

The final ending depends upon how a chain of events is allowed to progress. The process is something like setting up a chain of dominoes.

The falling of the final domino is affected by all of the other dominos in line before it.

Another difference between a wise man and a fool is that the wise man is consciously aware of his own attitude, and he adjusts it moment by moment. This does take practice and no small amount of self control.

However, the wise man realizes that his life depends upon his ability to do this. Therefore, he has created a positive matrix or attitude and lives within its framework, never allowing himself to step over the boundary lines.

For example, something is drawing you to learn more of the Gnosis. You may be aware of your reasons or not. It doesn't matter; you are here just the same. However, it is your attitude that counts. If you have a positive attitude, and come looking for just one grain of useful knowledge, you will likely find it. On the other hand, should your attitude be sour, your attention focused upon some other problem, you will come away with nothing and will have wasted your time. Notice that the advisor's time wasn't mentioned. You can bet the advisor gained something for his or her

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trouble. The CBR Keys of Wisdom are filled with little gems of knowledge.

No one can pick up on all of them at one sitting. That is why in a Luciferian home, the CBR Keys to Wisdom are read cover to cover over and over again, a key at a time. The children hear it from the cradle on until they begin reading it to their children. Human beings, like other small animals, are not born with inherent wisdom and knowledge, but must be taught by their parents and peers. The frequency and severity of the lessons depend upon how good of a memory the younger develops and how fast he or she dose it...

"Raising worthy children is like finishing a piece of fine furniture. Much polishing is required to bring up the shine."

The Seven Scrolls of The Black Rose (Children of The Black Rose Scroll #4)

ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT

All the world is a stage, but you are just an actor. Even so, it is possible to adjust the script to your liking. Remember, all adepts are spiritual warriors, and what do warriors do? They prepare for battle. One of the most important single variables of which an adept has control is attitude.

Here is a secret. We are all living an illusion. Call it a grand stage play if you wish or compare it to something that makes more sense to you.

Whatever it is, you can rewrite the script simply by changing your attitude.

Even the tone of your voice can have a profound effect. Try it and see...

All great stage plays are made up of many scene changes, each one requiring a different attitude. Is life not treating you as well as you would like? Well, perhaps you need to become a better actor.

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USE THE REST OF LIGHT TO BEST ADVANTAGE

As adepts gain experience they learn to value the Rest of Light and greatly revere it. In itself, it is a valuable tool for gaining control of the attitude monster. Some even think of it as an instant replay device that enables them to quickly run through past events, plugging different attitudes into them and watching the outcomes change as if by magic.

Successful military generals use this trick. They call it strategy. With a little practice, an adept can even forecast the outcomes of future events and the effects of his or her attitude upon them. The rest is up to how great an actor he or she ultimately becomes. Remember, one of the many excellent reasons for the Rest of Light is to solve problems, even attitude problems. It is amazing what this little ten minute period can do for you.

Even if you don't have such a problem, it can be of benefit in solving a plethora of other problems, even the problems of others. It is a wise investment in time management. By the way, one of the best tools an adept can develop is the lost art of assessment... That's looking at something and actually seeing what it really is, then assessing its value, its availability, and your access to it. During your Rest of Light, you might just try doing a little assessing, you might be surprised. Soon, you will find that you can adequately assess other people. Oh yes, when you find your answers, be sure and write them down in your journal as memory tends to fail in later years.

Is all this becoming a little heavy? Remember to pace yourself as these qualities take time to understand and even longer to accomplish. Is it worth it? Yes! Some adepts work on these keys of wisdom for years. For most, they become a lifetime project. This does not mean that you can't travel further until you achieve success, but do keep on chipping away at them. The whole point of all this is learning self discipline and self control.

Now, why would anyone want to do that? The answer is: anyone who has ever amounted to anything at all has learned these lessons. More than that any successful magician who has managed to survive has mastered them.

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"There have been those who could do miracles. Of course, the question arises as to how could they accomplish such feats, and the answer is always that they believed that they could. Their word was law, and they lived by it. Naturally, when they said that something would happen, it did.

Why? Because they said it would."

STILLING THE MIND

We all need a dependable way to rest and refresh ourselves, and the process of stilling the mind is used by adepts to consciously slip into a restive state, untroubled by outward conditions. In this restive state, both the body and the mind may be recharged so that they can perform at a high level of efficiency. Also, this restive state, untroubled by spurious, extraneous or intrusive thought may be used for spiritual and communicative purposes.

Generally, the subconscious mind will block us to some extent, so we practice "Little Deceits" to achieve our goals. In other words, we run a freight train by as a decoy so we can slip in a mouse.

Often daily events happen so fast they make our heads swim, or we end up talking to ourselves. The Keys of Wisdom allude to the practice of stilling one's mind. Believe it or not, this is just as important as fast thinking. An experienced adept can step out of the race, sit down, and still his or her mind in a few seconds. This has the effect of taking a nap, resting both mind and body at once. What is the advantage? Your adversaries will be tuckered out while you are rested. Think strategy! Many people try to rest, but instead, their minds race. Because of this, they get no rest and arise tired and sore, feeling worse than before. Some call this insomnia. Adepts call it foolish. There is a time to work, a time to play, and a time to rest. Do not attempt to mix them up. That is to say, take one thing at a time.

To some, stilling the mind is a foreign concept, and they will dismiss it as a crackpot idea. Before doing this, ask yourself: was Thomas Edison a

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crackpot? He did it many times each day, and look how successful he was. With a little practice, you will be successful too. Stilling the mind is most useful during your Rest of Light, and with just a little practice the two will soon be twins, one helping the other. This is how we open the closed doors to our spiritual self or higher nature, the one that can exist in the presence of the Force and the whisperings of those who have gone on before.

In the beginning, should you have trouble stilling your mind enough so that you can readily evaluate your innermost and private thoughts, remember this bit of wisdom: a song will soothe even a savage beast. Music can be a wonderful tool to help you change your thoughts from troubles, woes, and cares, to those of a happier, calmer nature. Try to play light, happy music to raise your vibrations to a higher level. Try to pay attention to the type of music you select to alter your mental state or mood. To relax and calm the mind, select smooth, flowing music. Flute music is fine. Somehow, the mind latches onto the simple, breathy melody and is carried away by it.

Obviously, loud music with a strong rhythmic beat and exciting lyrics won't do.

A radio or some other musical device is not necessary. Music can be created within the mind. Some adepts simply envision themselves sitting in some restive environment, playing their own instrument. It is not even necessary to know how to play the actual instrument in the every day world. In the reality of the mind, all things are possible. A flute is still a fine bet as it is simple. Many become so involved in their music that they forget the stress of the outside world and gain their desired restive mental state.

Another way is to concentrate on something simple. Envision yourself walking down a shady lane, looking at nature. Look for detail and realism; feel the breeze. Walk a dog if you wish, but don't allow any outside or extraneous thoughts to enter your mind. Simply brush them away as motes of dust floating in a sun beam. Become a part the scene, separate from your everyday world. Soon you will come to a slow, quiet, meandering stream of pure water. Allow yourself to flow along with the

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water, and let it swirl you into your desired restive state. At this point, you will be able to listen to spiritual input, think clearly, adjust your attitude, or just rest.

Try as many little deceptions as necessary to calm your mind to the desired restive state as long as you remain in total control. Keep trying, as one will work for you. Obviously, mind altering drugs and such take control away from you and are to be avoided. You will learn nothing from them. In fact, they weaken your will and open you to the assaults of the opposition. Experienced adepts have learned the value of being clean of spirit, mind and body. All are assets and must be carefully maintained for further use. Stilling the mind and understanding what you are thinking is not an easy task. However, it is a challenge that pays off! The trick is to lift your mind out of its ruts and place your thinking on a solid foundation; the deeper the rut, the greater the dividend! Think of it like this: you are learning to be a spiritual warrior. You are one who knows and can overcome any and all darkness.

You are learning not only for yourself but for those whom you will eventually advise. Admittedly, you must learn to conquer yourself and overcome your fears and limitation, but are you losing anything? No. Are you gaining something? Yes. Is it worth the effort? Yes. Think of all this as mental martial arts. What is the duly earned reward? A knowledgeable adept is never at the mercy of anyone or anything. Ever. However, with the knowledge, comes the responsibility. What responsibility? The responsibility to pass along your knowledge to those who need it, and to aid and assist when and where possible so they too can grow in stature.

I know that there are those among you who don't give a fig whether anyone else learns the Keys of Wisdom or not. However, The Force, or Lucifer, if you will, does reward those adepts who further his work by helping to build His spiritual army against the day when all Hell will surely break loose. He rewards with an increased allotment of power.

That is what we mean by growing in stature. Those of great stature have great power. The small- minded individuals have no power at all. Surely, you don't that Lucifer would increase the power of an idiot do you?

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LEARNING THE WAY

Does some of this sound repetitious? Do you know a better way to learn?

Stick around and watch your rose unfold. Perhaps, now would be a fine time to remind you that knowledge without experience is worthless. You guessed it, you have to practice what you learn for it to be of any value.

The more you do, the more you can do! That is a very selfish reason for teaching your down line. Just remember, the stronger they are, the better they can support you. Of course, you don't have to get carried away.

There is nothing wrong with keeping a couple of tricks out for yourself.

"There is much to learn, much to teach, and so little time in which to do it."

TAKING CONTROL

Here is something to ponder: Adepts who practice the right way to live also practice the right way to think. They have learned to work hand in hand with each other and in harmony with the Force. They have also learned to adjust their thinking accordingly.

Being chips off the Old Block, they realize that they are creators, some to more extent than others. Of course, all of this comes with practice.

Here is an example of right thinking, and an experiment that you can do: when you need to park on a busy street and know that a parking place will be hard to find, just ask for a space to be waiting for you, one just big enough. Visualize it, and you will know it when you see it. After all, you have made known your request to the Force and room has been made for you. Why not? It works for us. Is this magic? Yes. By the way, don't forget to say thank you! Here are other experiments that you can do: when you are out in the midday and become too warm, why not ask for a cloud to shield you from the sun? It's a plausible request isn't it? After all, there are

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a lot of clouds hanging around doing nothing.

Why not have an elemental move its cloud over a bit and shade you with it?

Oh yes, don't forget to say thank you, as you may grow warm again. Get the idea? Want a breeze? How about holding back the rain for a few moments while you get inside? Stock market tips and such come later to those who persevere. Lucifer takes care of his own. Need we say more?

THE PATH GETS STEEPER

Congratulations! You have survived the first twelve Keys and it's time to sharpen your sword so you can travel further. You know already about the old Law of Reason that states: "Never expect more out of something than you put into it," and becoming an adept is no different. You have already learned to look at life differently than you once did, live in the here-and-now, and get your head on straight. You have also learned to calm down, adjust your attitude, and rewrite the script of your life one line at a time. In fact, when you shake it all up and put it together into a whole, you have gained a wonderful new faculty. You have learned to see, assess, and change things to suit your purpose, all on the fly. Now, that's a pretty large accomplishment, considering that most people around you still don't even know the time of day and can't find their car keys.

However, what you have learned so far is just the tip of the ice berg, and there is much more wisdom and knowledge waiting in the wings for your inspection and use if you are willing to invest the effort to learn more.

Again, whether you are reading this book on your own or learning from one of your mentors, you must really desire to receive the full benefit of the Keys, be willing to practice them, and one day teach others who need it as much as you. Nothing is free, and the contract must be kept. All adepts pay for their higher education by passing on their knowledge along

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with the wisdom to use it. As we say, "The youngers shall follow the advice of the elders, and the elders shall show favor to the youngers." Do you see? All adepts run in circles, or perhaps, we should say, complete their circuits. After all, you can't get electrical current to run in a shorted circuit, and neither will the Force.

As always, you must ask for further understanding as you will need help in making sense of what follows as it is a process of growing as much as learning. Fortunately, there is plenty of help available for all who ask with a right heart, and for those who remain convinced and steadfast, there will be great reward.

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First week starting on the 30th You might not be able to see past the obstacles in your path, but to all outward appearances you have all the answers. Sometimes the mere appearance of having the answers (rather than actually having them) is more important. Tuesday and Wednesday, propelled largely by your agreeable nature, the world will be much more amenable to your desires than you expect. Suddenly you're sailing down the river at an incredible speed. Thursday and Friday you hit a weird patch in the current, and Saturday is stalled by the needs of your family. But Sunday is a stellar day.

Week Starting On the 6th

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Walk boldly toward your future on Monday. The beginning of the week is, to paraphrase a certain romantic comedy, the beginning of the rest of your life, and you might as well approach it with your all. Happily, romance is certain to figure in somehow. And, on Tuesday and Wednesday, so is a new activity -- something healthy, perhaps cardiovascular -- something that you genuinely enjoy doing. Thursday is for taking care of business, and Friday and Saturday likewise find you paying bills, making phone calls, answering the door. On Sunday, pretend you're a plant that needs shade: Stay in.

Week starting on the 13th Find your comfort zone as the week begins. Use any time off to burn off some excess energy, do some thinking and become more centered. Don't let a mishap throw you. Around Thursday and Friday, your personal fire's burning bright, and you're ready to do what needs to be done -- not to mention light up the night. Work should go great, and when it comes to play, think different, bigger and better. When the weekend comes, it may be time to take a look at your motivations. Is what you're up to in alignment with what's in your heart?

Week starting on the 20th You need to say no to new activities on Monday and Tuesday -- not because you aren't ready for them, but because you need to focus on whatever is right in front of you. Midweek is a much better time for exploring and taking action. Your good energy should push you in interesting new directions at this time. You're somewhat more focused on your possessions than usual as the weekend begins; you may need to deal with car or house repairs. Take it easy on Sunday and try to defer any heavy emotional business until later.

Week starting on the 27th Spring out of bed and into action on Monday -- you're ready for it, if the

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stars have their say! On Tuesday and Wednesday, it's more about concentrated thought and concerted effort. Take your time (especially if numbers are involved). Phone calls, emails, text messages and all manner of quick (and maybe flirty!) contact are favored at the end of the workweek, so stay connected. Don't be surprised if messages overlap in a way that's clearly kismet. This weekend, tidy up your place. While you're at it, get your thoughts and feelings in order, too.

First week starting on the 30th You're in the mood for love on Monday, and love is in the mood for you too. It's a day of perfect timing. If, walking out of a store, you happen to think of a good pal, you might run into them ten seconds later on the sidewalk. Tuesday and Wednesday leave you little time for such strolling, what with how chaotic they are (a word to the wise: Don't make any decisions concerning money), but Thursday and Friday are dominated by friends, food, security, contentment and (possibly) board games. Saturday is suited toward puttering around the house. On Sunday you may be asked to settle a dispute.

Week starting on the 6th Your evenhandedness and your sympathy toward others precede you on Monday, and, sensing this, someone might ask you for your help in resolving a dispute. Only get involved if you're genuinely impartial; the last thing you need is small-potatoes controversy. Tuesday and Wednesday are entirely uncontroversial (unless someone has a problem with you

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having fun, you holding a certain someone's hand, you being around friends, you having money in your wallet) and Thursday though Saturday are (if this is possible) even better. Lucky you! Sunday is intense -- you feel strongly about someone.

Week starting on the 13th You want a balance of 'seeing and being seen' and quiet time as the week begins -- and don't neglect any extra-close connections, which can definitely deepen now. Let your emotions flow. Around Thursday and Friday, both money and philosophy are in the stars. If you think they're unrelated, it's time to reexamine your career path as it relates to your ideals, plus what role finances play in your relationships. If you've got time for it, this weekend is perfect for a day trip -- and it needn't be an extravagant one. Pack a picnic!

Week starting on the 20th You're in a really good, solid position early in the week -- so much so that you may want to take a risk and get started on projects that seem pretty far-out or unfathomable. Don't let anyone rush you on Wednesday or Thursday, though you can be certain that certain people will try. Dig in your heels and do things at the pace you know they need to be done. The weekend should be great fun, as you're in a good mood and ought to have some entertaining activities planned. Slow down just a little bit on Sunday, though.

Week starting on the 27th Taking the first option you're presented with on Monday may be easy, but there's likely a way that's better for everyone involved. Find it, and look like a star. On Tuesday and Wednesday, be lavish with the compliments: Find the good that's all around you and be generous with your fine self.

Life's as sweet as you make it. Be aware of lost time toward the end of the workweek; you'll have to apply yourself to whatever it is you want to get done, workwise or personally. This weekend's perfect for socializing,

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and if you host, you're definitely the one with the most!

First week starting on the 30th You'll wish you were made of steel on Monday, as a challenge requires superhuman strength. Combine what brawn you do have with a tremendous amount of your brain and you should be set. Tuesday and Wednesday are an extended juggling act -- and you're not even juggling typical stuff, you're juggling fire hydrants and mattresses. What you really need -- and what you're not going to get on Thursday and Friday -- is a break. Instead, you'll be putting out fires, guarding your territory and telling friends to simmer down. What an exhausting week! It isn't until Sunday that you get to be yourself.

Week starting on the 6th The amount of time between coming up with ideas and executing them is quite short on Monday -- in other words, nothing can stop you now. Others may play devil's advocate, but you see the usefulness in this and don't let it deter you (or stifle your enthusiasm). Tuesday through Thursday, finding better ways to express yourself is the best use of your energy. Friday brings the week to a fun close -- energy, laughter and (perhaps) adventure figure in -- but Saturday overwhelms you. Sunday, happily, is slower,

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reflective and restorative for mind and body.

Week starting on the 13th Monday may be a fun day, but you find yourself becoming absorbed in more in-depth matters at the beginning of the week, too. Conduct some investigations. Around Thursday and Friday, you're extra sharp in terms of intellect, but you'll want to exercise some emotional intelligence, too. Be conscious about the tone of your interactions, both verbal and nonverbal.

And if something's confusing this weekend, don't just sit there all flummoxed -- get back into your investigatory mode. You'll bring interesting aspects to light.

Week starting on the 20th Your job is taking up more of your mental energy than usual on Monday and Tuesday, but it shouldn't be any more stressful. Apply yourself and you might impress exactly the right person! You may want to keep pushing throughout the week, in fact, as your tenacity is a key selling point for bosses or clients. At some point on Thursday, you need to take a little time out to reconnect with your core goals; speaking with a family member you respect may be the key. Sunday is nearly perfect, and you should be largely free of responsibilities.

Week starting on the 27th Get an expert opinion on Monday, whether it's for work or a personal dilemma. A trusted source points you down the right path. On Tuesday and Wednesday, cut out the gossip, and the drama will die down with it;

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then you'll have the stage set for productive conversations that build real bonds. With your current brainpower, you'll have lots to discuss -- and your personal electricity will amp up at the end of the workweek. Some sparks of the flirtatious variety will even start to fly! This weekend, fun may beckon, but get organized, too -- you'll want to reach out to someone far away.

First week starting on the 30th A group of people is the center of your thoughts on Monday. Friends, most likely: People you enjoy spending time around. If you're enjoying a meal together, show up with something festive -- a pineapple, say, or a sheet cake with tons of gaudy frosting flowers. Tuesday and Wednesday are overwhelming with the amount of work that must be done, but Thursday strikes you as a day of inspired new beginnings, and this, in turn, propels you to start even more new projects on Friday and Saturday.

Leave all the details for later. Your motto on Sunday is 'the bigger, the better.'

Week starting on the 6th You're not interested in deals or bargains or 'it's right here so it's good enough' on Monday. You are a person of standards and you're willing to give up whatever it takes to get what you want. Otherwise, what's the point? Tuesday through Thursday, an emphasis on the smaller things

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provides a healthy balance. Return some phone calls, set a few dates, clean the kitchen. You'll be happier on Friday and Saturday if the house is clean, what with domestic conflict looming, ready to be addressed. A certain amount of upheaval figures into Sunday.

Week starting on the 13th Enjoy an active Monday. After that day, your energy changes to focus on more emotional matters. If making a choice seems difficult during the beginning of the week, it may just be that it's tough to be detached now.

Don't pressure yourself. Around Thursday and Friday, find something to do at your own pace; you'll look good doing it. (If it benefits someone else, too, you'll look even better.) Whatever you're up to this weekend, be clear in your communication and don't avoid any little issues that pop up. You can swing things in a very positive direction now -- take the initiative!

Week starting on the 20th Your intuitive powers are quite strong -- maybe even eerie -- early this week, so pay attention to what your gut is trying to say and then take quick action. By Wednesday, things should settle down a bit in your life, though others are running around like crazed puppies. Take some time to reflect on where you've been lately. The early part of the weekend is a great time to take care of domestic matters, from paying bills to intense family discussions. Make sure you're listening carefully to what your friends are saying on Sunday.

Week starting on the 27th

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What you suspect is afoot on Monday may or may not be what's really happening. Find out before you voice it. On Tuesday and Wednesday, people are loving you -- share your feelings and your ideas, and have a plan in your back pocket for any and every situation. Give somebody a pleasant surprise! It's you that may be surprised -- at yourself -- near the end of the workweek. Acting out of character frees your heart and mind.

And this weekend, well, you're just plain hot. Do what makes you feel great -- you'll definitely look great while you're at it.

First week starting on the 30th Your frustration on Monday isn't so much that you don't like being a cog in a machine -- it's that you don't like the machine you're part of. Find a way to bust out of this familiar territory; infiltrate a new social group. Tuesday or Wednesday, if someone invites you to a party, convey your enthusiasm with a magnificent piece of fruit. Or a hulking sunflower. Or a nice bottle of something. Don't be afraid to go splashy. Thursday and Friday see a return to conservatism in the social realm -- why come on too strong, after all? Saturday fills you with a warm, wonderful glow, and Sunday's utopian.

Week starting on the 6th You are sprinting toward a finish line on Monday, and you've never looked better. You don't mind hearing a cheering crowd, but it's not the reason

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you set out in the first place -- your satisfaction runs much deeper.

Tuesday through Thursday, concentrate on the stuff that you've been setting aside: the bills, the house, feeding the dog. Take the long view on your future. Friday and Saturday, you are plugged in -- getting people to agree with you takes virtually no effort -- but Sunday you begin to wonder if you aren't better off going the next phase alone.

Week starting on the 13th Monday's perfect for getting your fun on -- friends and the out-of-doors go great together now. By the evening, though, and through Tuesday and Wednesday, more serious matters require your concentration. Apply your intellect, and also let your instincts have their (very important!) say. If you're in the market for romance (or looking to spice up the one you already have), Thursday and Friday are prime time -- you're endlessly alluring, fun and funny to boot. This weekend, lend a friend a listening ear or a helping hand -- what you want can wait (at least a little while!).

Week starting on the 20th Though you may not be in the best mood ever as the week begins, you do have a creative edge that forces you to see the world differently. It might be a good time for you to try something new and adventurous. Wednesday brings someone into your life who opens up a few new possibilities that are equally exciting and intimidating. Pick and choose and see where they lead. Issues with authority tie up your Friday and Saturday, though you ought to be able to talk your way out of any long-term repercussions.

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Week starting on the 27th Stretch your mind on Monday, and your heart will expand accordingly.

There's pleasure in new knowledge, satisfaction in new skills and joy in new people. On Tuesday and Wednesday, though, proceed with caution: You're under a microscope now, and everything you do reflects on you.

Act modest even if you know you're the bomb. Friends, coworkers and pretty much the world as a whole are back on your side at the end of the workweek. Share your latest, greatest ideas and your hopes and feelings, and listen to theirs, too. This weekend, that little voice is trying to tell you something. Hear it roar!

First week starting on the 30th Everyone else has to take three strides to equal one of yours on Monday.

And the length of your legs has nothing to do with it. Your birds-to-stones ratio is just higher than everyone else's right now. It's almost as if you're magic. Tuesday and Wednesday, you are absolutely in control of your destiny. If you are, for example, jubilant, these days will be filled with men in fedoras and shiny shoes dancing around light poles -- and who wouldn't want to see that? Thursday through Saturday, your world is considerably less theatrical, but Sunday is busy in a very pleasant way.

Week starting on the 6th You like to control the game plan, it's part of your personality, but there

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are absolutely too many variables in play on Monday. Your flexibility -- and your enthusiasm about being flexible -- is crucial. Tuesday through Thursday, you can have your way with one thing: Cleaning up. You can clean up however you like -- blast the stereo and make a game of it. As you go, you'll come up with a billion new ideas for projects. Friday and Saturday, you're stumped when it comes to making a decision. If a partner is involved, you should defer to them; it's good for you to get used to doing that.

Week starting on the 13th Recreation may be on the schedule for Monday, but your energy all through the beginning of the week is decidedly intellectual. Your inquiring mind wants to know, and the more you know, the more informed and finely tuned your instincts become. To get the most out of life around Thursday and Friday, you're going to need to let it get a little messy. Quell that instinct to organize and control, just for now. By the time the weekend comes, things may be going in a very good (and even very romantic!) direction. Let your imagination take the lead.

Week starting on the 20th On Monday or Tuesday, say no to anything that comes your way and involves shuffling around work or personal projects. You just don't have enough time or space quite yet! If anyone persists, you may lash out at them in the middle of the week, thanks to an infusion of feisty energy that makes you quick to defend your interests (as well as those of the people you love). By Friday, you settle down somewhat and become more contemplative, possibly diving into a new book or conversation that

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provokes deep thought. Work issues pop into your mind on Sunday, and you need to deal with them right away.

Week starting on the 27th Whoa, there! Standing up for yourself is one thing, but on Monday you're liable to get a little aggressive about it. Take as many deep breaths as necessary, and reassess. On Tuesday and Wednesday, you're meshing with others much better -- take delight in those you find especially compatible, and they'll love you. You're able to identify problems at a glance at the end of the workweek, but shouting them out may not make you the most popular person. This weekend, put together a meeting of the minds, a fun group outing or a great date (or all three). You've got the skills for sure.

First week starting on the 30th Heaviness prevails on Monday. If you're wearing a backpack, take it off for a second. If you must have a donut, how about an unfrosted one? Follow a deep conversation with a funny pop song. Tuesday and Wednesday you have a lot to talk about -- find someone, or a rotating cast of people, to share these days with -- but Thursday you're better off keeping your head down and working than you are with trying to explain yourself. Friday and Saturday, as much as you may feel like jumping ship on a project, don't.

Someone needs an answer on Sunday, and they'll rely on you for it.

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Week starting on the 6th Your taste is hard to beat these days -- people look to you for recommendations on everything from books to music to where to go for an evening out. The TV can be so dull, can't it? Tuesday through Thursday, you're not in the market for dull. You're finding things out about friends you never knew, simply because you're asking penetrating questions. (Be sure to answer their questions in return. Fair's fair.) Friday and Saturday, a romantic encounter, or a series of them, lifts you up, makes you lighter on your feet. By Sunday, you're already becoming possessive.

Week starting on the 13th Get back to nature on Monday. Even if it's just going out to a park, it'll feed your heart and soul. Tuesday and Wednesday are much more work-oriented, so dive in and get major stuff done. You're especially eagle-eyed with numbers and money matters now. Then, on Thursday and Friday, it's all about words -- and communication of the more subtle, unspoken variety. People are likely to respond to you resoundingly positively now, especially in the love department. The weekend has you concerned with the past. Make sure you process, rather than dwelling.

Week starting on the 20th Your eye for beauty is a key asset early in the week, letting you help someone who really needs you. It's a good chance to forge a stronger relationship, and you should find things picking up after just a few days.

It's a great time to advance romantic partnerships or pursue new work buddies. Friday and Saturday require your objective judgment -- though you may find it difficult to keep from taking sides before you've heard everyone speak. Sunday brings a wave of mental energy that's great for

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getting things done.

Week starting on the 27th You like things nice and balanced, but confronting an issue or a person head-on might be called for on Monday. (You can still use your signature diplomacy, after all.) On Tuesday and Wednesday, life seems to be getting back in harmony, and you're likely to be whistling happily while you work and while you play. A certain duet sounds sweet now, too. Feed that mind of yours toward the end of the workweek, whether it's with a new skill, some art or whatever inspires you. The weekend looks busy; carve out time in advance for some free-form you time.

First week starting on the 30th Doing battle with an opponent isn't the way to go on Monday. You have your pride, sure, but giving in would clear up your time for a bunch of other things. Flexibility, fluidity, not being too attached -- these are useful qualities. Tuesday and Wednesday, you are tempted with a financial risk (don't do it) and Thursday you're considering going somewhere you've never been for dinner (absolutely do it). Friday and Saturday, the world yields happily to your desires, especially, paradoxically, if you don't try too hard. On Sunday, play it cool.

Week starting on the 6th

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Monday is not the right time to call attention to yourself, especially at work. The boss will be on the warpath, and anyone in the wrong field of vision will become an unwitting target, so it's not the time to violate the dress code or anything. Tuesday through Thursday are great days -- quiet, modest in scope, but fascinating to you, stimulating, enriching -- and Friday and Saturday are easy-going. Then comes Sunday, a 24-hour period best described as magical. You radiate a sense of possibility and power, and you have everyone's respect.

Week starting on the 13th If Monday morning finds you a bit befuddled, just give it a little time. Fresh energy's en route -- energy of the sort that brings all your finest qualities to the forefront. You're sharp as a tack, dynamic and generally fabulous through Wednesday. Just don't get carried away around Thursday and Friday, when you really ought to analyze what's happening around you (not to mention your place in it all) realistically. The weekend finds you nicely in balance, not to mention playing nicely with others. Enjoy time spent with friends, family or a certain special someone.

Week starting on the 20th You start to see new possibilities in an old situation early this week, and your imagination is enough to get you moving in a bold new direction.

Everything seems to line up for you, as long as you're taking the initiative and getting started on whatever's firing you up. Watch out for a too-intense focus on Friday or Saturday -- you don't want to neglect any of the important parts of your life while chasing your dream! The fine print might trip you up next week if you don't take a little extra time to look at it on Sunday.

Week starting on the 27th

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Dial down that innate intensity on Monday. For best results, take a cautious, measured approach to people and situations, and save the drama. On Tuesday and Wednesday, the kind of courage you need isn't the brave and bold sort -- it's the type that will allow you to open up and be vulnerable, to look for common ground instead of separating yourself.

Embrace your world now. If you do, something that seems little could have a big impact at the end of the workweek. Just make sure you don't judge a book by its cover. This weekend, a fresh perspective and a deepening relationship bring you joy.

First week starting on the 30th Choose one battle on Monday -- it doesn't need to be contentious, just something you care about -- and explain to others why it's important to you. On Tuesday and Wednesday you think of yourself as the leader of a movement in the old-fashioned mold, the strength of which is based on the strength of relationships. On Thursday and Friday, expect to negotiate varying levels of engagement among a group of very different people; on Saturday, asking questions is a brilliant way of drawing interest out of others. On Sunday, something very fortunate is bound to happen.

Week starting on the 6th You're having daydreams of a tropical vacation on Monday, or maybe you actually have tickets to go somewhere. Whatever the case, travel is on the brain. Tuesday through Thursday, the more time you spend around others,

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the more you're going to wish you were on a jet plane -- it's not them or you, exactly; there's just something glitchy in the social chemistry. But Friday and Saturday, you and your pals get along like characters in a sitcom. There's about as much laughter as in a sitcom too. Decisions might be hard on Sunday, but connecting with people won't be.

Week starting on the 13th Monday's energy is sunny and bright, so seize the day and have your way with it! By evening time and for the next couple of days, your outlook may be more changeable. Perhaps you're acknowledging a problem and processing it; maybe you're in a dreamy state of mind. By Thursday and Friday, though, your personal forecast is super. Regardless of the actual weather, there's much to delight and surprise you in your world. You're radiant now, too; people want to bask in your glow! Seek out music, art and culture this weekend -- the inspiration really takes hold.

Week starting on the 20th You see or overhear something on Monday that resonates with you -- and reminds you of a troubling situation in your own life. You may want to ponder this for a while to see if you can draw out any lessons. Your love life improves quite a bit midweek, even if you had thought it was already as good as it could possibly be! It all boils down to having fun with the right person. On Friday, you may be motivated to help out around the house or in the community, and that spirit is rewarded handsomely. Try not to let your family drive you insane on Sunday.

Week starting on the 27th You're extra active and all sorts of fun on Monday, if the stars have their say. Get this week started right! On Tuesday and Wednesday, keep the good energy going by helping someone out -- a coworker, a neighbor, a

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friend. Life looks a little hectic at the end of the workweek, but you'll be able to sort out what's important from what can wait until later. Just apprise friends, your boss and so forth of your updated priorities. This weekend, you're questioning everyone and everything. Your inquiring mind wants to know!

First week starting on the 30th Monday should, above all else, be fun. If there's a lot on your desk that can wait, well, clear off your desk and do a puzzle -- a complicated nature scene, maybe. Tuesday and Wednesday, the challenge in front of you is to fly straight through a cloud of gossip and distraction. Thursday and Friday, arrows are landing in bull's-eyes left and right, thanks to your clarity of mind. Saturday is equally successful on the small scale, which in turn leads you to think more about the big scale: long-term goals, you in five years, stuff like that. Sunday is best spent around as few people as possible.

Week starting on the 6th You're being pulled left and right on Monday -- especially at work.

Everyone is acting as if you owe them something. It's a frustrating day, but after Monday, the week only gets better. Tuesday through Thursday are full of discoveries, minor breakthroughs and long-lost friends. It's funny how someone can resurface at exactly the right moment. Friday and Saturday, your energy is high but your timing is dismal: No matter how hard you work, the pieces just won't snap into place. Not yet, at least. A

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conversation on Sunday puts everything into perspective.

Week starting on the 13th Force yourself to focus on anything and everything other than work on Monday -- get outside, connect with friends, enjoy life! There's plenty of time to catch up on Tuesday and Wednesday, when the stars say you'll be extra organized and decisive -- perfect. Around Thursday and Friday, a favorite project or plan may go awry, but don't despair. Rethink and regroup, and get a consultation from a friend, a mentor or somebody in the know. When the weekend comes, the wheels are greased for whatever it is you're looking to do. Enjoy some serious kismet!

Week starting on the 20th Your intuitive powers are almost overwhelming on Monday and Tuesday -but make sure you listen! Your gut is trying to tell you something of paramount importance. If you get bad news midweek (things could go either way for you), make sure not to give up. Your persistence will guarantee the best possible outcome. By Thursday, you deserve a break from the hustle and bustle, and your good energy should allow you to make the most economical use of your time. On Sunday, watch out for people who don't take things seriously.

Week starting on the 27th Monday may hold delays, endings or sudden changes. You'd prefer stability, but even if this stuff's unsettling, there are opportunities here, too. On Tuesday and Wednesday, cultivate some warm and fuzzy feelings -- and share them. You can really heat up your world now (especially the

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region of romance!). Then get to the heart of a certain matter at the end of the workweek. Beating around the bush just stirs up unrelated fuss. This weekend, projects around the house are favored. How about that spring cleaning?

First week starting on the 30th On Monday you find the key that opens the door that unlocks the mystery that explains the long-standing question -- it's one of those days, as if you're in a children's book or something. Tuesday and Wednesday, the storybook is much more grown-up: The plotline involves a little (or perhaps a lot) of smooching. Thursday and Friday are a sort of reality check: You are reminded that the world is not one non-stop fairy tale; responsibilities loom. Saturday, do something active, something good for your body, because Sunday you'll want to sit around the house writing music, or at least listening to it.

Week starting on the 6th You're struck by lightning on Monday -- not actual lightning, but a bolt of brightness, of inspiration -- and the suddenness of the revelation is extraordinary. Creativity flows out of you unbidden. Use it to your advantage Tuesday through Thursday when dealing with others, as it will present a variety basket of challenges. (Everyone has their own agenda and not everyone is altogether forthcoming.) By Friday and Saturday, you'll have broken down some barriers and you'll be engaging with real people --

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instead of being aloof and cool, be interested and kind. Sunday is slow but deep.

Week starting on the 13th Do something you normally wouldn't even consider on Monday. The venture out of your comfort zone might just feel very freeing. Tuesday and Wednesday probably find you focused on what's happening at work -- or what should be happening in your career. It could be time to get proactive about your path. Find a community you share values with around Thursday and Friday. A political event, the arts, whatever unites people on common ground finds you at home. And when the weekend comes, have a plan -- or just resign yourself to something, even if it's getting very little done!

Week starting on the 20th Your spiritual side is making noises early in the week -- noises that you would do well to listen to with care. There's more going on around you than you realize, but you can find a more peaceful way to live if you want.

By Wednesday, you should be amazed at the results, thanks to quick integration of your new understanding. Watch out for a little emotional crash later in the week that manifests more as boredom than depression.

Hey, life can't be a roller coaster all the time! Your creative energy starts to peak on Sunday.

Week starting on the 27th Your own inimitable style's hot stuff on Monday -- how you look, how you approach situations and people ... not to mention general flair. Work it! On Tuesday and Wednesday, watch for coincidences, symbols and signs. The universe works in funny ways now, and you're just the one to figure them out (and to see the humor in all of it). And speaking of hot stuff, make a

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move in the romantic department at the end of the workweek. You're sizzling, and a love discovery awaits. This weekend, home and nature are both satisfying. How about dining in followed by a starlit walk?

First week starting on the 30th Beauty presents itself to you again and again on Monday, but so do a number of illusions. Before you go gaga over someone or something, make sure that they (or it) actually possess(es) the qualities that appeal to you. Tuesday and Wednesday, as the efficacy of certain illusions dawns on you and begins to dissolve, you have this frustrating situation to deal with: Everything you thought you knew for sure is called into question. Thursday and Friday, interestingly enough, find you in a theatrical mood, conveying illusions yourself. Saturday is romantic, but Sunday is private.

Week starting on the 6th Everyone's got their own goals, their own friends, their own secrets -- and that's okay. You don't have to form an opinion on every aspect of a person if they're worth befriending. When meeting someone new on Monday, trust your gut. Don't abide gossip. Tuesday through Thursday, you're honing your relationship skills further. You're trying to be a model of helpfulness, spontaneity and enthusiasm -- that's how you would want someone to act toward you. Friday and Saturday you decide to stake your ground on something, pick your path, and others respond well. Sunday is a big day.

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Week starting on the 13th Work's not where it's at for you as the week begins -- you're dreamy, you're slow to judge, you're much more about the process than any goal.

It's terrific stuff for any creative pursuits, and for relationships ... and for experiencing the world in all of its glory. Save more action-oriented endeavors for Thursday and Friday, when you're sharper -- a problem-solver and a negotiator. This weekend, practice moderation, as more than a little of anything goes a long way -- plus you'll love the variety involved in mixing it up a bit!

Week starting on the 20th You have the first couple of days of the week to apply your terrific energy to pretty much any project that appeals to you -- or to reserve it for later and just enjoy each day as it comes. A mystery appears on Wednesday and absorbs you for a little while, though you're just as likely to walk away from it after a while as you are to solve it. You've got something to say this weekend, but your excellent word choice and presentation may be covering up hidden feelings, especially resentment. Something small changes in your life on Sunday. Pay attention, because this alteration may have long-term consequences.

Week starting on the 27th In a haze on Monday? Could it be love? If not, just you wait -- Tuesday and Wednesday turn up the heat on romantic matters, and your way with words (not to mention the nonverbal stuff) is remarkable. Let your imagination wander now. It's your prerogative to change your mind, and

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you just might be doing so with frequency at the end of the workweek.

Perhaps notifying someone of your latest take on things is premature -- the shift may be fleeting. This weekend, you're on firmer ground, and you're both inspired and inspiring.

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On the sentimental side, you're likely to be mistaken, to take a purely physical attraction for something much more important and profound.

Rather unstable health, with risks of respiratory problems or hepato-biliary pains.

You'll hardly be motivated to fight, and you won't really know what you want.

If you wish to try your luck with gambling, go ahead this time; the cosmic influxes will probably bring you pleasant surprises; but don't stake too much.

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A relaxing atmosphere will reign in your home.

Closely watch over your children's health; make sure they are be up-to-date with their vaccinations.

A project that you really have your heart set on will require a lot of efforts, but success is guaranteed.

You'll live your love affairs as on a roller coaster, but this won't be without charm.

Be careful of certain friends.

During this month nothing is more prejudicial to you than pessimism; but if you're definitely optimistic and realistic, you can gain some nice successes on all fronts.

Lucky month: your failures and sufferings will be transformed into joys and peace.

A favorable climate for plans of amorous unions, for a durable engagement and, concerning lonely hearts, for a determining encounter.

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You'll by no means be willing to tighten your belt; fortunately, you'll have a completely unexpected money entry.

Taking your health at heart, you'll undoubtedly be interested in organic products; and you'll be right, because organic products are undoubtedly of better quality than standard ones.

You are likely to face important problems if you give in to your present tendency to making fun of everything all the time.

It'll be necessary to remain on your guards in your professional environment: the more you gain successes and the more numerous your adversaries will be.

Good month for health: your vitality will reach its peak.

Good accord at home, which will be a true haven of peace for you; however, a little more tenderness and generosity from your part would be advisable; don't try to repress or dissimulate your sentiments.

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It'll be difficult for you to make some savings, but prudence will be essential in the financial domain.

With your outrageous criticisms you're likely to tire out your best-intentioned interlocutors.

You'll have many opportunities to meet a partner to your liking who, in addition, will share your passions; have an honest comportment.

Be careful of overwork and its damaging consequences; certainly, you'll want to do well, but your resistance will be declining, and you'd better slow down your pace temporarily; sleep more.

Your relations with your family circle are likely to be a source of cruel frustrations for you.

You'll suddenly want to put something else into your existence, more readily turning towards philosophy or religion.

Be realistic, don't embark on obviously unbounded undertakings.

The discussions in your family are likely to degenerate into arguments; therefore content yourself with keeping silent; an easing of the situation will take place shortly.

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Discussions and arguments will cause agitation in your family life.

On the sentimental side, be sure that your desire to immortalize everything immediately isn't an easy solution, a way of excusing yourself from thinking, of tranquilizing yourself.

Be an opportunist and consolidate the relations that are likely to be useful to you.

Watch out, you'll have a clear tendency to live well above your means; don't think that you'll always be able to get away with it; you're likely to find yourself at a dead end.

If you're not afraid of failure, then it's failure that will fear you this time and

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will keep away from your path; so dare to launch original initiatives and take calculated risks.

Your professional ambitions will be rewarded.

Luck will smile to you in your practice of new leisure activities.

You'll be given discrete assistance.

Don't abuse wood-fire or barbecue cooking: it can be toxic and have a cancerous effect because of burned particles; about this subject, know that microwave ovens are much healthier.

Your love life will suddenly bloom.

Ideal month to get engaged or married.

For once, you can manage to conciliate work and family life.

No serious health problem to be coped with; you'll have a good appetite, but don't abuse sweet things.

Avoid dealing with any kind of litigious matter; play for time.

Events will be favorable to you on the professional plane; nevertheless, intensify your efforts if you want to achieve your goals.

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A good month to finish a delicate job or to put an end to some bad habits.

Your nerves will be skin-deep and you'll have a hard time controlling your impatience.

Your passions will turn from hot to cold at close intervals, and you'll vacillate between carnal passion and almost ethereal tenderness.

Avoid mingling questions of money with your current good relationships with your friends; never try to borrow money from them; also refuse to lend money to one of them, even though he really needs it.

Your relationships with the other sex will be tinted with romanticism; very pleasant sentimental encounters in view.

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Your projects will start to be structured, but don't hurry and run the risk of seeing everything turn turtle.

Some headaches, which could be due to a slight overwork; take it easy, make sure to get enough sleep.

Think about getting rid of those relations that don't bring anything to you and that only make you waste your time and even your money; only keep those of whom you're sure and who share certain interests with you.

You'll have a very good chance to satisfy your heart's deepest aspirations.

Grant your children some degree of autonomy; if you feel overwhelmed, ask for help or advice.

Your reflexes will be slower and less precise: be careful in your gestures.

You'll skillfully carry out a financial transaction.

Put your business in order; wouldn't this be the moment to sort out your projects and plans, and to launch immediately what can be achieved in a short term?

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Other Great Sites

http://wetstags.ning.com

http://bacaworld.org/

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AwolNation Live 105 BFD 2011 Sun. Jun 5, 2011 11:00 AM Shoreline Amphitheatre..

Mountain View, CA

Back In Black 100.3 Jack's Throwback Sat. Jun 25, 2011 7:00 PM Gexa Energy Pavilion Dallas, TX

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Black Veil Brides Vans Warped Tour Fri. Jun 24, 2011 11:00 AM Gexa Energy Pavilion Dallas, TX BUY TICKETS

Sat. Jun 25, 2011 11:00 AM Sam Houston Race Park Houston, TX BUY TICKETS

Sun. Jun 26, 2011 11:00 AM AT&T Center San Antonio, TX BUY TICKETS

Wed. Jun 29, 2011 11:00 AM NMSU Practice Field Las Cruces, NM BUY TICKETS

Thu. Jun 30, 2011 TBA Plaza Hotel and Casino Las Vegas, NV BUY TICKETS

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Fri. Jul 1, 2011 11:00 AM Pomona Fairplex Pomona, CA BUY TICKETS

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Deftones Mon. Jun 6, 2011 7:00 PM Verizon Theatre at Gra..

Grand Prairie, TX BUY TICKETS

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Dilinger Escape Plan Deftones with The Dillinger Escape Plan Wed. Jun 15, 2011 7:00 PM The Fox Theater-Pomona Pomona, CA

Henry Rollins 2011 Bonnaroo Music Festival - 4 Day Pass Thu. Jun 9, 2011 TBA Bonnaroo Manchester Fa..

Manchester, TN

Hinder Sat. Jun 25, 2011 8:00 PM Wild West Arena North Platte, NE

Iron Maiden Thu. Jun 2, 2011 TBA O2 World - Hamburg Hamburg, BUY TICKETS

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Mon. Jun 27, 2011 7:30 PM Le Bercy BUY TICKETS Tue. Jun 28, 2011 7:30 PM Le Bercy

Papa Roach Thu. Jun 2, 2011 8:00 PM Cajundome Lafayette, LA BUY TICKETS Q101 Jamboree 2011 Sat. Jun 4, 2011 12:00 PM First Midwest Bank Amp..

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Seether Q101 Jamboree 2011 Sat. Jun 4, 2011 12:00 PM First Midwest Bank Amp..

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Wed. Jun 29, 2011 8:00 PM Commodore Ballroom Vancouver, BC

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Steel Panther Fri. Jun 3, 2011 11:30 PM House of Blues-NV Las Vegas, NV BUY TICKETS

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Arcade Fire Arcade Fire Portsmouth 6/8 Wed. Jun 8, 2011 7:00PM NTELOS Wireless Pavilion Portsmouth, VA BUY TICKETS

2011 Bonnaroo Music Festival - 4 Day Pass Manchester 6/9 Thu. Jun 9, 2011 Bonnaroo Manchester Farm Manchester, TN BUY TICKETS Arcade Fire 6/28 Tue. Jun 28, 2011 8:00PM Le Zenith: Paris

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Bon Jovi tickets here Wed. Jun 22, 2011 Murrayfield BUY TICKETS Fri. Jun 24, 2011 Old Trafford Cricket Ground Trafford

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Sat. Jun 4, 2011 7:00 PM The Wiltern Los Angeles, CA BUY TICKETS

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Dave Matthews Band Tickets Fri. Jun 24, 2011 1:00PM Bader Field Atlantic City, NJ

Def Leppard Wed. Jun 15, 2011 7:30 PM Cruzan Amphitheatre West Palm Beach, FL BUY TICKETS

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BUY TICKETS

Sat. Jul 2, 2011 7:30 PM Mohegan Sun Arena-CT Uncasville, CT BUY TICKETS

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Summerfest - Def Leppard and Heart Tue. Jul 5, 2011 7:30 PM Marcus Amphitheater Milwaukee, WI

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Kid Rock Atlantic City 6/18 Sat. Jun 18, 2011 8:00PM Borgata Casino Event Center Atlantic City, NJ BUY TICKETS

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Kid Rock and Sheryl Crow Cincinnati 7/2 Sat. Jul 2, 2011 7:00PM Riverbend Music Center Cincinnati, OH BUY TICKETS Kid Rock and Sheryl Crow Milwaukee 7/3 Sun. Jul 3, 2011 7:00PM Marcus Amphitheater Milwaukee, WI BUY TICKETS Kid Rock and Sheryl Crow Burgettstown 7/6 Wed. Jul 6, 2011 7:00PM First Niagara Pavilion Burgettstown, PA BUY TICKETS Kid Rock and Sheryl Crow Hartford 7/7 Thu. Jul 7, 2011 8:00PM Comcast Theatre - CT Hartford, CT

Fri. Jul 8, 2011 8:00 PM Sound Academy - ON Toronto, ON

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Fri. Jun 24, 2011 7:45PM Spokane Arena Spokane, WA BUY TICKETS Mon. Jun 27, 2011 7:45PM Abbotsford Entertainment & Sports Centre Abbotsford, BC BUY TICKETS Wed. Jun 29, 2011 7:45PM The CN Centre Prince George, BC BUY TICKETS Sat. Jul 2, 2011 7:00PM MacDonald Island Park Fort McMurray BUY TICKETS Wed. Jul 6, 2011 Centennial Park - ON Sarnia, ON

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Lynrd Skynrd Fri. Jun 24, 2011 7:00 PM Family Arena Saint Charles, MO BUY TICKETS

Sat. Jun 25, 2011 7:00 PM Divots Events Center Norfolk, NE

Mumford and Sons Fri. Jun 3, 2011 6:30 PM City Market Kansas City, MO BUY TICKETS 2011 Wakarusa Music & Camping Festival - Saturday Sat. Jun 4, 2011 Mulberry Mountain Ozark, AR BUY TICKETS

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Sun. Jun 5, 2011 8:00 PM The Pageant Saint Louis, MO BUY TICKETS

Tue. Jun 7, 2011 8:00 PM Asheville Civic Center Asheville, NC BUY TICKETS

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Raleigh, NC BUY TICKETS 2011 Bonnaroo Music Festival - 4 Day Pass Thu. Jun 9, 2011 TBA Bonnaroo Manchester Fa..

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2011 Telluride Bluegrass Festival - 4 Day Pass Thu. Jun 16, 2011 TBA Telluride Town Park Telluride, CO BUY TICKETS

Sat. Jun 18, 2011 11:00 PM Sheridan Opera House Telluride, CO

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Robert Plant Wed. Jun 8, 2011 8:00 PM Copley Symphony Hall San Diego, CA BUY TICKETS 2011 Bonnaroo Music Festival - 4 Day Pass Thu. Jun 9, 2011 TBA Bonnaroo Manchester Fa..

Manchester, TN BUY TICKETS Thu. Jun 9, 2011 7:30 PM San Manuel Indian Bing..

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Mon. Jun 13, 2011 8:00 PM Palace Theatre Columbus Columbus, OH BUY TICKETS

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Saint Louis, MO BUY TICKETS Thu. Jun 16, 2011 8:00 PM Ravinia Highland Park, IL BUY TICKETS

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2011 Telluride Bluegrass Festival - 4 Day Pass Thu. Jun 16, 2011 TBA Telluride Town Park Telluride, CO BUY TICKETS

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Sat. Jun 25, 2011 8:00 PM Borgata Casino Event C..

Atlantic City, NJ BUY TICKETS

Fri. Jun 24, 2011 7:00 PM Salle Wilfrid- Pelleti..

Rush tickets Wed. Jun 8, 2011 7:30PM Bi-Lo Center Greenville, SC BUY TICKETS Fri. Jun 10, 2011 7:30PM New Orleans Arena New Orleans, LA

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BUY TICKETS Sun. Jun 12, 2011 8:00PM Frank Erwin Center Austin, TX BUY TICKETS

Tue. Jun 14, 2011 7:30PM Don Haskins Center El Paso, TX BUY TICKETS Thu. Jun 16, 2011 7:30PM US Airways Center Phoenix, AZ BUY TICKETS Sat. Jun 18, 2011 7:30PM Cricket Wireless Amphitheatre - CA Chula Vista, CA BUY TICKETS

Mon. Jun 20, 2011 7:30PM Gibson Amphitheatre Universal City, CA BUY TICKETS

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Fri. Jun 24, 2011 8:00PM MGM Grand Garden Arena Las Vegas, NV BUY TICKETS Sun. Jun 26, 2011 7:30PM Sleep Train Pavilion at Concord Concord, CA BUY TICKETS

Tue. Jun 28, 2011 7:30PM Sleep Country Amphitheater Ridgefield, WA BUY TICKETS

Sat. Jul 2, 2011 7:30PM Gorge Amphitheatre Quincy, WA BUY TICKETS

Thu. Jun 30, 2011 8:00PM Rogers Arena Vancouver

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Steve Miller Band Thu. Jun 23, 2011 8:00 PM Fraze Pavilion Dayton, OH BUY TICKETS

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U2 Wed. Jun 1, 2011 7:00PM Commonwealth Stadium - AB Edmonton, AB BUY TICKETS Sat. Jun 4, 2011 7:00PM Qwest Field Seattle, WA BUY TICKETS Tue. Jun 7, 2011 7:00PM Overstock.com Coliseum Oakland, CA BUY TICKETS Fri. Jun 17, 2011 7:00PM Angel Stadium of Anaheim Anaheim, CA BUY TICKETS

Sat. Jun 18, 2011 7:00PM Angel Stadium of Anaheim Anaheim, CA BUY TICKETS Wed. Jun 22, 2011 7:00PM M&T Bank Stadium Baltimore, MD BUY TICKETS

Sun. Jun 26, 2011 7:00PM

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Spartan Stadium-MI East Lansing, MI BUY TICKETS

Wed. Jun 29, 2011 7:00PM Sun Life Stadium Opa Locka, FL BUY TICKETS

Sat. Jul 2, 2011 7:00PM Vanderbilt Stadium Nashville, TN BUY TICKETS

Tue. Jul 5, 2011 7:00PM Soldier Field Chicago, IL

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Welcome my kinky friends!

And another packed month of fetish fun to keep yourselves more than amused ;)

On a personal note if anyone goes to any of these events please oh please let me know and maybe send me a pic or a little write up on it so I can let others know whats hot and whats not!

Happy Playing my beloved friends TQ

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June 1 - 5 NY Fetish Marathon New York, USA www.nyfetishmarathon.com

June 3 - 5 Womans International LeatherFest Dallas, Texas, USA www.womansinternationalleatherfest.net

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June 3 - 6 Kinky Karnival Wichita, Kansas, USA www.twistedtemptationsks.net/kinkykarnival2.htm

June 9 - 12 Southeast LeatherFest Atlanta, Georgia, USA www.seleatherfest.com

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June 9 - 12 Twisted Tryst Midwest, USA www.twistedtryst.com

June 10 - 12 WyldFire Central Texas, USA www.touchofleather.org

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June 10 - 12 FarmCon Kentucky, USA www.dulca-scenes.org

June 10 -13 DESIRE Palm Springs, California, USA www.desireleatherwoman.com

June 11 - 13 Gulf Coast Gummbalaya Weekend New Orleans, Louisiana, USA

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www.lsrubber.net

June 14 - 19 Fires Of Venus Darlington, Maryland, USA www.freespiritgathering.org

June 18 - 19 Leather Pride Weekend & Folsom Street East New York City, New York, USA www.leatherpirdenight.org

June 22 - 27 Dark Odyssey North Baltimore, Maryland, USA www.darkodyssey.com

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June 26 - 28 Butchmanns Experience Mens Weekend Phoenix, Arizona, USA www.butchmanns-experiencemensweekend.org

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The Seduction

by Andrew

As I look into your deep blue eyeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, And touch your velvety soft skin, Running my finger ever so gently across your jaw line, As I bring my lips to yours, Kissing you deeply as I take your breath away, As our lips are about to part, I bite down on your lower lip as I pull away, A romantic evening we have had, Dancing under the crescent moon, It would be a shame to leave you in such bliss, As you feel the cold steel blade, Running between your thighs,

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As the silk fabric seamlessly parts, At the sharpness of the blade, As it glides along your side, Then up between your breast, As the dress floats to the ground, And your breath quickens with anticipation, As he lays out the ropes before you, And begins to intricately work the knots, Harnessing your breast and between your thighs, As each of your arms are bound behind your back, As you are suspended in the air, You know you are moments away from feeling your Masters Love, With flogger and crop, He works your sensitive breast, And swollen wet lips, Bring you tears of pleasure and pain, With whip and crop, He takes you to the point of rapture, As he then takes you himself, With violent forceful passion, Bringing you screams of erotic pleasure, That takes you to your climatic state, And brings him to his knees, Once more you feel that cold steel blade, As he delicately tease your flesh as he cuts you free, Now my obedient Queen; Will you submit solely and fully unto meâ&#x20AC;Ś.

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(Lesbian, Gay, Bi-sexual, Transgender community)

an article on LGBT news: contributed by Persephone Parents keep child's gender secret Jayme Poisson STAFF REPORTER “So it’s a boy, right?” a neighbour calls out as Kathy Witterick walks by, her four month old baby, Storm, strapped to her chest in a carrier.

Each week the woman asks the same question about the baby with the squishy cheeks and feathery blond hair.

Witterick smiles, opens her arms wide, comments on the sunny spring day, and keeps walking.

She’s used to it. The neighbors know Witterick and her husband, David Stocker, are raising a genderless baby. But they don’t pretend to understand it.

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While there’s nothing ambiguous about Storm’s genitalia, they aren’t telling anyone whether their third child is a boy or a girl.

The only people who know are Storm’s brothers, Jazz, 5, and Kio, 2, a close family friend and the two midwives who helped deliver the baby in a birthing pool at their Toronto home on New Year’s Day. “When the baby comes out, even the people who love you the most and know you so intimately, the first question they ask is, ‘Is it a girl or a boy?’” says Witterick, bouncing Storm, dressed in a red-fleece jumper, on her lap at the kitchen table.

“If you really want to get to know someone, you don’t ask what’s between their legs,” says Stocker.

When Storm was born, the couple sent an email to friends and family: “We've decided not to share Storm's sex for now — a tribute to freedom and choice in place of limitation, a stand up to what the world could become in Storm's lifetime (a more progressive place? ...).”

Their announcement was met with stony silence. Then the deluge of criticisms began. Not just about Storm, but about how they were parenting their other two children.

The grandparents were supportive, but resented explaining the gender-free baby to friends and co-workers. They worried the children would be ridiculed. Friends said they were imposing their political and ideological values on a newborn. Most of all, people said they were setting their kids up for a life of bullying in a world that can be cruel to outsiders.

Witterick and Stocker believe they are giving their children the freedom to

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choose who they want to be, unconstrained by social norms about males and females. Some say their choice is alienating.

In an age where helicopter parents hover nervously over their kids micromanaging their lives, and tiger moms ferociously push their progeny to get into Harvard, Stocker, 39, and Witterick, 38, believe kids can make meaningful decisions for themselves from a very early age.

“What we noticed is that parents make so many choices for their children. It’s obnoxious,” says Stocker.

Jazz and Kio have picked out their own clothes in the boys and girls sections of stores since they were 18 months old. Just this week, Jazz unearthed a pink dress at Value Village, which he loves because it “really poofs out at the bottom. It feels so nice.” The boys decide whether to cut their hair or let it grow.

Like all mothers and fathers, Witterick and Stocker struggle with parenting decisions. The boys are encouraged to challenge how they’re expected to look and act based on their sex.

“We thought that if we delayed sharing that information, in this case hopefully, we might knock off a couple million of those messages by the time that Storm decides Storm would like to share,” says Witterick.

They don’t want to isolate their kids from the world, but, when it’s meaningful, talk about gender.

This past winter, the family took a vacation to Cuba with Witterick’s parents.

Since they weren’t fluent in Spanish, they flipped a coin at the airport to decide what to tell people. It landed on heads, so for the next week, everyone who asked was told Storm was a boy. The language changed immediately.

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“What a big, strong boy,” people said.

The moment a child’s sex is announced, so begins the parade of pink and barrage of blue. Tutus and toy trucks aren’t far behind. The couple says it only intensifies with age.

“In fact, in not telling the gender of my precious baby, I am saying to the world, ‘Please can you just let Storm discover for him/herself what s (he) wants to be?!.” Witterick writes in an email. ** Stocker teaches at City View Alternative, a tiny school west of Dufferin Grove Park, with four teachers and about 60 Grade 7 and 8 students whose lessons are framed by social-justice issues around class, race and gender.

When Kio was a baby, the family travelled through the mountains of Mexico, speaking with the Zapatistas, a revolutionary group who shun mainstream politics as corrupt and demand greater indigenous rights. In 1994, about 150 people died in violent clashes with the Mexican military, but the leftist movement has been largely peaceful since.

Last year, they spent two weeks in Cuba, living with local families and learning about the revolution. Witterick has worked in violence prevention, giving workshops to teachers. These days, she volunteers, offering breast-feeding support. At the moment, she is a full-time mom.

Both come from liberal families. Stocker grew up listening to Free to Be ...

You and Me, a 1972 record with a central message of gender neutrality.

Witterick remembers her brother mucking around with gender as a teen in the ’80s, wearing lipstick and carrying handbags like David Bowie and Mick Jagger.

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The family lives in a cream-colored two-storey brick home in the city’s Junction Triangle neighborhood. Their front porch is crammed with bicycles, including Kio’s pink and purple tricycle. Inside, it’s organized clutter. The children's arts and crafts projects are stacked in the bookcases, maps hang on the walls and furniture is well-used and of a certain vintage.

Upstairs they co-sleep curled up on two mattresses pushed together on the floor of the master bedroom, under a heap of mismatched pillows and blankets. During the day, the kids build forts with the pillows and pretend to walk a tightrope between the mattresses.

On a recent Tuesday, the boys finish making paper animal puppets and a handmade sign to celebrate their dad’s birthday. “I love to do laundry with dad,” reads one message. They nuzzle Storm, splayed out on the floor. The baby squeals with delight.

Witterick practices unschooling, an offshoot of home-schooling centred on the belief that learning should be driven by a child’s curiosity. There are no report cards, no textbooks and no tests. For unschoolers, learning is about exploring and asking questions, “not something that happens by rote from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. weekdays in a building with a group of same-age people, planned, implemented and assessed by someone else,” says Witterick. The fringe movement is growing. An unschooling conference in Toronto drew dozens of families last fall.

The kids have a lot of say in how their day unfolds. They decide if they want to squish through the mud, chase garter snakes in the park or bake cupcakes. ** Jazz — soft-spoken, with a slight frame and curious brown eyes — keeps his

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hair long, preferring to wear it in three braids, two in the front and one in the back, even though both his parents have close-cropped hair. His favorite colour is pink, although his parents don’t own a piece of pink clothing between them. He loves to paint his fingernails and wears a sparkly pink stud in one ear, despite the fact his parents wear no nail polish or jewelry.

Kio keeps his curly blond hair just below his chin. The 2-year-old loves purple, although he’s happiest in any kind of pyjama pants.

“As a result, Jazz and now Kio are almost exclusively assumed to be girls,” says Stocker, adding he and Witterick don’t out them. It’s the boys’ choice whether they want to offer a correction.

On a recent trip to High Park, Jazz, wearing pink shorts, patterned pink socks and brightly colored elastics on his braids, runs and skips across the street.

“That’s a princess!” says a smiling crossing guard, ushering the little boy along. “And that’s a princess, too,” she says again, pointing at Kio with her big red sign.

Jazz doesn’t mind. One of his favorite books is 10,000 Dresses, the story of a boy who loves to dress up. But he doesn’t like being called a girl. Recently, he asked his mom to write a note on his application to the High Park Nature Centre because he likes the group leaders and wants them to know he’s a boy.

Jazz was old enough for school last September, but chose to stay home.

“When we would go and visit programs, people — children and adults — would immediately react with Jazz over his gender,” says Witterick, adding the conversation would gravitate to his choice of pink or his hairstyle.

That’s mostly why he doesn’t want to go to school. When asked if it upsets him, he nods, but doesn’t say more.

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Instead he grabs a handmade portfolio filled with his drawings and poems. In its pages is a booklet written under his pseudonym, the “Gender Explorer.” In purple and pink lettering, adorned with butterflies, it reads: “Help girls do boy things. Help boys do girl things. Let your kid be whoever they are!” * Storm was named after whipped winds and dark rain clouds, because they are beautiful and transformative.

“When I was pregnant, it was really this intense time around Jazz having experiences with gender and I was feeling like I needed some good parenting skills to support him through that,” says Witterick.

It began as a offhand remark. “Hey, what if we just didn’t tell?” And then Stocker found a book in his school library called X: A Fabulous Child’s Story

by Lois Gould. The book, published in 1978, is about raising not a boy or a girl, but X. There’s a happy ending here. Little X — who loved to play football and weave baskets — faces the taunting head on, proving that X is the most well-adjusted child ever examined by “an impartial team of Experts.”

“It became so compelling it was almost like, How could we not?” says Witterick.

There are days when their decisions are tiring, shackling even. “We spend more time than we should providing explanations for why we do things this way,” says Witterick. “I regret that (Jazz) has to discuss his gender before people ask him meaningful questions about what he does and sees in this world, but I don't think I am responsible for that — the culture that narrowly defines what he should do, wear and look like is.”

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Longtime friend Ayal Dinner, 35, a father two young boys, was surprised to hear the couple’s announcement when Storm was born, but is supportive.

“I think it’s amazing that they’re willing to take on challenging people in this way,” says Dinner. “While they are political and ideological about these things, they’re also really thinking about what it means and struggling with it as they go along.”

Dinner understands why people may find it extreme. “Although I can see the criticism of ‘This is going to be hard on my kid,’ it’s great to say, ‘I love my kid for whoever they are.’”

On a recent trip to Hamilton, Jazz was out of earshot when family friend Denise Hansen overheard two little girls at the park say they didn’t want to play with a “girl-boy.” Then, there was the time a saleswoman at a second-hand shop refused to sell him a pink feather boa. “Surely you won't buy it for him — he's a boy!” said the woman. Shocked, and not wanting to upset Jazz, Witterick left the store.

Parents talk about the moment they realize they would throw themselves in front of a speeding truck to save their child from harm, yet battle the instinct to overprotect. They want to encourage independence. They hope people won’t be mean. They pray they aren’t bullied. No parent would ever wish that for their child.

On a night after she watched her husband of 11 years and the boys play with sparklers after dark, Witterick, in a reflective mood, writes to say we are all mocked at some point for the way we look, the way we dress and the way we think.

“When faced with inevitable judgment by others, which child stands tall (and sticks up for others) — the one facing teasing despite desperately trying to fit

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in, or the one with a strong sense of self and at least two 'go-to' adults who love them unconditionally? Well, I guess you know which one we choose.” * Diane Ehrensaft is a California-based psychologist and mother of Jesse, a “girlyboy” who turned his trucks into cradles and preferred porcelain dolls over soldiers when he was a child. Her newly published book, Gender Born, Gender Made, is a guide for parents of nonconforming kids.

She believes parents should support gender-creative children, which includes the transgendered, who feel born in the wrong bodies, and gender hybrids, who feel they are part girl and part boy. Then there are gender “smoothies,” who have a blended sense of gender that is purely “them.”

Ehrensaft believes there is something innate about gender, and points to the ’70s, when parents experimented by giving dolls to boys and trucks to girls.

“It only worked up to a certain extent. Some girls never played with the trucks, some boys weren’t interested in ballet ... It was a humbling experiment for us because we learned we don’t have the control that we thought we did.”

But she worries by not divulging Storm’s sex, the parents are denying the child a way to position himself or herself in a world where you are either male, female or in between. In effect they have created another category: Other than other. And that could marginalize the child.

“I believe that it puts restrictions on this particular baby so that in this culture this baby will be a singular person who is not being given an opportunity to find their true gender self, based on also what’s inside them.”

Ehrensaft gets the “What the heck?!” reaction people may have when they

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hear about Storm. “I think it probably makes people feel played with to have that information withheld from them.”

While she accepts and supports Jazz’s freedom “to be who he is,” she’s concerned about asking two small boys to keep a secret about the baby of the family. “For very young children, just in their brains, they’re not ready to do the kind of sophisticated discernment we do about when a secret is necessary.”

Jazz says it’s not difficult. He usually just calls the baby Storm.

Dr. Ken Zucker, considered a world expert on gender identity and head of the gender identity service for children at Toronto’s Centre for Addiction and Mental Health, calls this a “social experiment of nurture.” The broader question, he says, is how much influence parents have on their kids. If Ehrensaft leans toward nature, Zucker puts more emphasis on nurture. Even when parents don’t make a choice, that’s still a choice, and one that can impact the children.

When asked what psychological harm, if any, could come from keeping the sex of a child secret, Zucker said: “One will find out.”

The couple plan to keep Storm’s sex a secret as long as Storm, Kio and Jazz are comfortable with it. In the meantime, philosophy and reality continue to collide.

Out with the kids all day, Witterick doesn’t have the time or the will to hide in a closet every time she changes Storm’s diaper. “If (people) want to peek, that’s their journey,” she says.

There are questions about which bathroom Storm will use, but that is a couple of years off. Then there is the “tyranny of pronouns,” as they call it. They

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considered referring to Storm as “Z”. Witterick now calls the baby she, imagining the “s” in brackets.

For the moment, it feels right.

“Everyone keeps asking us, ‘When will this end?’” says Witterick. “And we always turn the question back. Yeah, when will this end? When will we live in a world where people can make choices to be whoever they are?” http://www.parentcentral.ca/parent/babiespregnancy/babies/article/995112-parents-keep-child-s-gender-secret

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