Kendra

kendra@auburnopelikaparents.com

Auburn Opelika

Lee County’s Foremost Parenting Source

Auburn Opelika Parents Magazine is founded on the principle that parenting is an exciting, diverse, challenging, and significant role in our community. Auburn Opelika Parents Magazine is a community advocate for families and the parenting process.

Publisher

Kendra Sumner

Kendra@auburnopelikaparents.com

Editor DeAnne Watson

Contributing Writers

Kristi Bush, LSW

Dr. Jordan Jensen

Gabriele Jones

Beth Long, PhD, LPC, BCBA

Cheryl Maguire

Cover Photography

Keightley Garnett

Simple Joy Photography www.simplejoyphoto.com

President Jason Watson

Director of Sales

Justin Sumner (334) 209-0552

Ad Design Tim Welch

Web Content Manager Scott Davis

Auburn-Opelika Parents magazine is published monthly by KeepSharing, LLC. Mailing address: 475 Bennington Ct, Auburn, Alabama, 36830. The phone number is (334) 329-8073 and fax is (334) 826-7303.

Auburn-Opelika Parents is copyrighted 2023 by KeepSharing LLC. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or part without written permission is prohibited. Opinions expressed in Auburn-Opelika Parents magazine are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the view of the owners, nor do they constitute an endorsement of products and services herein.

by Beth Long, PhD, LPC, BCBA

Helping Your Child Handle “Big Emotions”

How can I help my child and myself handle big emotions? The clinical term for “big emotions” is emotional dysregulation, which is the inability to control or regulate emotional responses.

The process of emotional regulation is complex and lifelong. Theoretically, we learn this skill first, the skill of relating to others second, and the ability to reason last. But, unfortunately, the skill of regulating is often not developed.

Think about the last time you lost your keys or cell phone. A family member asked, “Where did you have it last?” and you blew up. That person ap proached you with reason, but you responded without regulat ing your emotions. When dealing with difficult emotions, we must ensure regulation first, relation second, and reason third. Every time…In that order… Every time!

As we grow, emotional regulation skills develop through the rhythmic motion of play: running around the playground, swinging, kicking a ball back and forth, going across monkey bars, bouncing, throwing, and dancing. This rhythmic cycle starts when parents begin pacing or rocking to calm their crying infant. However, parents must continue to teach and model rhythmic motion skills to teach their children emotional regulation.

In my opinion, this is where toddlers’ use of handheld devices is most detrimental to development. If the child is given a phone to “help him calm down,” instead of being held and rocked or encouraged to engage in rhythmic motion, he is not learning how to naturally self-soothe. Instead, your child is learning to distract himself from difficult emotions. As parents, we all need to intentionally incorporate rhythmic movement into our daily lives: running, walking, dancing, etc. We need to say to children, “I am really angry about something that happened at work today, so I am going for a walk to help my brain and body calm down.” Parents must model that they are not overwhelmed by their big emotions. As children grow older, they will imitate what we model.

We model the skills of relating by showing empathy. The best way to relate through empathy is by telling stories. In younger children, we talk about what just happened. For example, “You grabbed the cookie, and I would not let you have it, so you started to cry.” We relate to older children, teenagers, and adults by talking about a time we went through the same thing. Do not “one up” the other person just to say, “me too”. Remember, it is alright for them to feel big emotions! They will continue to experience them throughout their life. They just need to know that they are seen, heard, and understood. We attempt to reason only after ensuring regulation and relation have successfully occurred. The step of reason usually occurs minutes, hours, or sometimes even days after the emotional dysregulation occurs. If we wait until our children can reason, their brains are optimized for the learning process.

Truthfully, the most common error I observe is that parents model emotional dysregulation. Therefore, your children’s ability to manage difficult emotions is directly related to YOUR ability to manage their uncomfortable feelings. Before reacting, make sure you are regulated, have spent some time compassionately relating to yourself or another person, and are fully able to reason.

Dr. Beth Long received her education in Counseling Psychology from Chapman University. She is a Licensed Professional Counselor and Board Certified Behavior Analyst. Beth has worked in six unique clinical environments across the country and currently owns Works of Wonder Therapy in Montgomery. Beth utilizes the knowledge from a variety of different disciplines to give her patients the best care possible. To learn more visit www.worksofwondertherapy.com.

MOMIX: Alice

On February 16, travel down the rabbit hole MOMIX-style, with Moses Pendleton’s newest creation, Alice, inspired by Alice in Wonderland. As Alice’s body grows and shrinks and grows again, Pendleton’s dancers extend themselves by means of props, ropes and other dancers. The Alice story is full of imagery and absurd logic—before there was surrealism there was Alice—an invitation to invent, to let imagination run and play outside. As with every MOMIX production, you never quite know what you are going to get. Audiences will be taken on a journey that is both magical, mysterious, fun, eccentric and much more. As Alice falls down the rabbit hole and experiences every kind of transformation, so will you. Gogue Performing Arts Center, 910 South College St. www.goguecenter.auburn.edu/momix-alice/

Campfire Cooking Desserts

On February 25, join this fun, casual cooking class that explores tips, tricks, and recipes for cooking over an open fire. Campfire

Cooking II builds on Campfire Cooking I but taking the first class is not required. Cyndi Czerkawski (In The Garden instructor) takes a farm-to-table approach to campfire cooking using fresh, local ingredients. Whether you are experienced or you are new to open fire techniques, you are bound to get something new out of this class, not to mention the great food and fun! Pre-registration is required. Campfire Cooking is $20 per person. Anyone under the age of 19 must be accompanied by an adult. Kreher Preserve & Nature Center, 2222 North College Street. Visit our website: https://aub.ie/ campfirecooking.

Auburn Gymnastics Meet

Join the top ranked Auburn Gymnastics Team for an evening of competition on the bars, beam, vault and the floor. Auburn kicked off the year with a 197.350 at the inaugural Super 16 in Las Vegas this past Saturday. The score was a program-best season opening mark as the Tigers finished third behind No. 1 Oklahoma (197.925), No. 4 Michigan (197.400), then-No. 10 UCLA (197.275). Get your tickets for February 10 against LSU and February 24 against Georgia. Neville Arena, Auburn Campus, 250 Beard-Eaves Court. www.aburntigers.com/sports/womens-gymnastics

Mardi Gras Parade in Downtown Auburn: February 18

Krewe de Tigris was born of myth and magic. For over 5,000 years, the tiger has represented power, passion, and a fierce spirit. Magnificent in a yellowgold coat striped with black, the tiger paces the plains of Auburn with grace. In 1808, author and poet William Blake told the tale by saying, “Tiger, tiger, burning bright in the forests of the night. What immortal hand or eye dare frame thy fearful symmetry? How powerful our God must be to fashion such a creature”. 3:00pm.

www.krewedetigris.com/parade

Daddy Daughter Dances with Auburn and Opelika Parks and Rec

February 10-11

Auburn’s 33rd Annual Daddy

Daughter Date Night: Auburn Junior High School Fieldhouse Gym, 405 S. Dean Road. This year’s theme is “Magic In The Air” and will feature a teal and gold color scheme with peacock feathers and glitter accents. There will be food, music, dancing, a photo op and a chance to visit with special guests. www.auburnalabama.org/parks.

Opelika’s Daddy Daughter Dance: Opelika SportsPlex, 1001 Sportsplex Parkway. $30 per couple/$10 additional daughter. Registration required by Feb 5. www.opelika-al.gov

CSO- Can This Be Love?

This a good question to ask, especially just after Valentine’s Day. We may not have a conclusive answer, but we do have a lot of evidence for your consideration. On February 17, we’ll explore romantic love, love of family, doomed love, love for all the wrong reasons, sacrificial love, and just about every kind of love there is. You’ll have to draw your own conclusions. www.rivercenter.org/event/cso-can-this-be-love/ RiverCenter for the Performing Arts, 900 Broadway, Columbus, Ga.

Sweethearts Day at The Montgomery Zoo

Moms bring your sons, dads bring your daughters to a wild day of adventure and fun at the Zoo and Museum, February 11. Purchase a regular daytime adult admission, and receive one FREE child admission. What a great way to spend the day with your special loved one. Admission includes

-- Entry to the Zoo and Mann Museum

-- Entry Waters of the World, open daily 10am - 3pm

-- Entry to Parakeet Cove, Petting Zoo, and Reptile Facility

-- Participate in Pygmy Hippo Day activities (10am - 2pm).

Montgomery Zoo, 2301 Coliseum Pkwy, Montgomery. www.montgomeryzoo.com/

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War Eagle Run Fest on Toomer’s Corner

On your mark... get set... go! Register for the second annual War Eagle Run Fest on February 26, 2023! This new half marathon begins at Toomer’s Corner and ends in Jordan-Hare Stadium. There will be a half marathon, 5K, and kids’ 1-mile run option. Half Marathon runners will start at the iconic Toomer’s Corner, run past the Auburn University President’s House, see the Duggar Concourse, Quad Drive, Haley Concourse, and Thach Concourse before running by the Outdoor training pool on Wire Road. After running a lap on the Hutsell-Rosen Track and seeing the Intramural Playing Fields and Football Practice Fields, runners will pass the Coliseum and Auburn Arena before turning into Jordan-Hare Stadium to #flydownthefield and finish on the 50-yard line. 5K runners will stage near Toomer’s Corner and start on Thach Concourse. The 5K course will take runners past the Intramural Playing Fields, Football Practice Fields, and the Coliseum before turning into Jordan-Hare Stadium to #flydownthefield and finish on the 50-yard line. Kids’ Mile- Limited to kids 13 years of age and younger, the War Eagle Kids Mile will start near Jordan-Hare Stadium and let kids #flydownthefield and finish on the 50-yard line. www.wareaglerunfest.com

Mother Son Gala

Mom and Sons date night goes formal on February 10-11! Ticket includes a meal, corsage, boutonniere and entertainment. $30 per couple/$10 each additional son. Registration required by Feb 3. Covington Recreation Center, Opelika Parks and Rec. 213 Carver Ave. www. opelika-al.gov www.facebook.com/auburnopelika.parents