10 minute read
Kids Say the Wisest Things
by Beth Long, PhD, LPC, BCBA
Teach Them to... PAUSE
Can you control your thoughts, feelings, and emotions? If you answered “yes”, think again. Adult thoughts, feelings, and emotions come and go as quickly as children when it is time to do chores. We have no control over them. The only thing we can control is our response. Appropriate responses are created when we learn to pause. Learning to pause is a multilayered process that requires you to understand more about how the brain works.
Our brains never stop talking to us. Some of the statements made by your brain are helpful, “Watch out for that car, that driver is texting” or “You were very rude to that clerk and need to apologize.” Some thoughts are simply untrue, “My son hates math, so he is never going to be able to keep a job” or “She made a rude gesture towards me in the meeting. She obviously does not like me.”
Like I said earlier, our brains never stop gathering information and attempting to make sense of it. When we draw conclusions, our brain provides options on how to interpret this information. Unfortunately, we often draw the wrong conclusions and react before we realize that the story our brain tells us is a lie. These stories are the real problem, not the thoughts, feelings, and emotions that led to the creation of the story.
Unfortunately, children do not yet know how to pause and evaluate the accuracy of the stories their brains are telling them. This is why we see huge emotional reactions when we say “no” to the second cookie. Your daughter’s brain may be telling her, “You will never be able to eat another cookie.” If your child cries every time you tell him a problem is incorrect on his math homework, his brain may be screaming, “I am so dumb, I can’t even do math.”
How do we teach them to pause?
1. Start by practicing mindfulness
with your child. No, you are not sitting cross-legged on the floor chanting with your children. Mindfulness is the habit of experiencing the present moment without judgement. For example, make statements like, “I am driving in a car” instead of “I am driving in an old car around other people with nicer cars.” Teach your child to recognize the facts of the situation instead of their judgements or interpretations of the situation. Practice this several times a day. Please do not attempt to do this when they are overly emotional. Do it when they are calm. Ask simple questions like, “What do you see, what do you hear, what do you feel?” Redirect their answers to the facts.
2. Begin using story language. Teach them to say, “My brain is telling me…” Use this language and model it regularly. “My brain is telling me that you had a horrible day at school because you are not happy this afternoon. Is that true?” Then, believe the given answer.
3. Model this story language for them.
Tell them stories every day about what your brain was telling you during a situation and then contrast that with the truth of the situation.
4. Create time for these practices.
Leave time in your schedule to have these conversations with yourself and your child. Yes, it is that important. Once your children begin to understand that they do not need to believe everything their brain is saying, they will begin to pause.
Dr. Beth Long received her education in Counseling Psychology from Chapman University. She is a Licensed Professional Counselor and Board Certified Behavior Analyst. Beth has worked in six unique clinical environments across the country and currently owns Works of Wonder Therapy in Montgomery. Beth utilizes the knowledge from a variety of different disciplines to give her patients the best care possible. To learn more visit www.worksofwondertherapy.com.
Alex City Jazz Fest
June 10 and 11 * 6 pm to 10:30pm The Alexander City Jazz Fest’s Friday night show will be at Strand Park in Alex City. The Saturday night show will take place at The AMP on Lake Martin. This is a free event! Visit theamponlakemartin.com/events.html for all the details.
Alabama Shakespeare Festival Through June 26
Festival Stage | 2 Hours Recommended Ages 13+ This smash OffBroadway hit takes us to the 1958 Springfield High School prom, where we meet and learn about the lives and loves of Betty Jean, Cindy Lou,
Missy, and Suzy: four girls with hopes and dreams as big as their crinoline skirts. When the Wonderettes reunite to perform at their 10-year reunion, we learn about the highs and lows the girls have experienced in the past decade and are charmed to find that no matter what life throws their way, they will conquer it together. Featuring more than 30 classic 50s and 60s hits, including “Lollipop,” “Dream Lover,” and “Lipstick on Your Collar.” Visit www.asf.net for tickets.
Juneteenth 2022
Sunday, June 19 * 10am to 2 pm With the Art Museum and Blount Cultural Park as our backdrop, this Juneteenth we’ll celebrate African American artistic traditions from Jazz and Soul to sculpture and images from as far back as the 1860s to as recently as 2019! Join us inside for this celebration of freedom centered on culture, creativity, and community. After enjoying the events in Blount Cultural Park, head downtown for the Rosa Parks Museum’s Annual Juneteenth Celebration from 11 AM to 6 PM and then over to the Riverwalk Amphitheater from 4 to 9 PM where the City of Montgomery Department of Cultural Affairs will round out celebrations with an event honoring Global African Diaspora Heritage Day. Visit www.mmfa.org for more info.
Kayak Trail Fun Run
Saturday, June 4 Come take an exciting ride down the Autauga Creek. Lots of beautiful sites, bamboo, waterfalls and beautiful foliage. You must provide your own equipment, (canoe, kayak, paddleboard, life jackets, sunglasses, drinking water, sunblock etc.). No glass or alcoholic beverages allowed. A bus will be waiting to shuttle you back (no charge) to the starting point. The last shuttle will leave the creek walk area at 9:45am. Creek Walk is behind City Hall in Prattville, AL. Visit www.prattvilleal.gov/.
The Fairy and the Lumberjack
Friday, June 10 * 6-8pm Troy University’s Davis Theatre
The Fairy and the Lumberjack is one of the most popular of all Korean folktales. Traditional dance, choreographed by Ms. Sudha Raghura, a native Indian dancer and Alabama screenwriter and director, Angela Dickson, have woven cultures together to produce a tragic love story. Presented by A-KEEP, a non-profit that serves as a bridge for unity between the Alabama and Korean cultures and languages. Tickets · $12.50 www.eventbrite.com/e/the-fairy-and-thelumberjack-tickets-277167835457
Pike Road Theatre Co. Presents Disney’s The Little Mermaid Jr.
June 17 and 18 Pike Road Intermediate School The Little Mermaid Jr. showcases the talents of 45 kids participating in the Youth Production Camp with the Pike Road Theatre Company. Making her PRTC directorial debut is award winning director, Kim Hutchens from Birmingham, AL. This classic Disney title contains all of the songs from the Academy Award® winning animated feature film as well as three new songs from the Broadway show. PERFORMANCE SCHEDULE June 17th-June 18th, 7:30 PM Tickets are $12 with group rates available and can be purchased at www.pikeroadtheatrecompany.org or eventbrite.com.
Biscuits Baseball Family Faith Night
Friday, June 10 * 6:35 pm * Riverwalk Stadium Enjoy fellowship as groups from churches all across the River Region join us for a night of faith-based music and games! Visit www.milb.com for more info.
Military Appreciation Days at the Zoo
June 14-16 at the Montgomery Zoo The Montgomery Zoo and Mann Museum invites all active duty and retired military personnel to visit the Zoo for free on Military Appreciation Days, June 14-16. Maxwell Air Force Base, the Zoo, the Montgomery Chamber, and local sponsors partner to hold this annual event that recognizes our national heroes. For more information, call (334) 625-4900.
Montgomery R&B Blues Picnic
Sunday, June 12 11 am until midnight In the heart of the city at River Walk Amphitheater, featuring: R&B and Blues music from the 80’s to the new millennium, Games, Family Fun (All ages event), Tasty Food, Yoga Sessions. You can bring your cooler ($35 fee), blanket, lawn chair, and umbrella. Visit www. rnbbluespicnic.com for details.
Eastchase Farmers Market
7 a.m.-noon * Saturdays through September More than 40 vendors featuring homemade breads, jams, baked goods, Wagyu beef, local honey and more! Visit theshoppesateastchase.com or follow The Shoppes on FB and Instagram.
Creekwalk Concert in Prattville
2nd and 4th Tuesday, June and July Beginning June 14 * 6:30 pm Bring your lawn chairs or blankets and enjoy a free concert by the beautiful Autauga Creek at Heritage Park. Creekwalk Concerts will be held on the 2nd and 4th Tuesdays of June and July and will feature local and regional bands. For information, call (334) 595-0850.
McKee Middle School boasts many wonderful teachers and this month we honor one of its finest, Aaron Franks. For 13 years, Mr. Franks has empowered young minds ranging from grades seven through nine, currently teaching 7th-grade Geography and Civics. He shares his inspiration, “The middle school years are the most impressionable years for most pupils, particularly African American males. These years require intense attention to detail and guidance.”
Mr. Franks is a graduate of Auburn University at Montgomery (Secondary Education Social Science) and the University of West Alabama (Master’s of Social Science). Currently, he’s in a Master’s Administration program.
Being a teacher aligns with Mr. Franks purpose. He never considered teaching a job, but a spiritual responsibility and esteemed profession. In his role, he values the responsibility of being a part of providing guidance, direction, and truth to youth. The passion that Mr. Franks exudes flows from his belief that teaching is God’s work, and molding the minds and perspectives of adolescents should not be taken lightly.
Since the beginning of his teaching career, Mr. Franks has maintained three consistent goals:
Aaron Franks
McKee Middle School
