Teens, Tweens & Screens

Devices as Christmas Gifts...

What You Need to Know

Christmas is here! I feel like we were celebrating last year’s Christmas, well, yesterday. Time sure does fly. I think being a parent immediately puts all of us in a time warp. Speaking of, how much do you miss the “old days” of Christmas? If you are north of 30, you know what I am talking about. Devices were not the “main gift”. We used to ask for bicycles, coloring books, Lite-Brites, Cabbage Patch Kids, or a baseball bat. Okay, maybe you need to be north of 40 to remember some of those, but the reality is that devices didn’t become the main attraction until about 10, maybe 15, years ago. Other than the occasional Nintendo, our parents were not out buying cell phones, iPads, or gaming devices that had access to the entire world.

I am also willing to bet if you had approached one of your parents with the idea of “do you want to buy a device that will allow your 8-yearold to have access to anyone across the world at all hours of the day,” they would have told you to take a hike. I think there is something to be said for the “go outside and play” generation. Our gifts usually brought us together with friends or, at the very least, spurred a safe, creative outlet.

But as much as we can wish for the old days, we are most definitely in a new and different generation. And if your child has their first cell phone or gaming device on their list, there are a few things we must consider first, as parents, to protect our kids. First, how old is your child? And I do not mean just chronologically. What is their maturity level? I have met many 16-year-olds I did not think should have access to any online activity. Take some time to think about how your child acts and reacts to situations. Do they follow your rules? Will they obey the boundaries you set, or will they test them at all times? This will help you decide if it is time for a device, if they need restrictions placed on it, or if they may not need one at all. Secondly, are you ready for a part-time job? What does this mean? The parents I work with always ask, “What is the ‘best age’ for a device?” I always respond with, “Are you ready for a part-time job?” Are you ready for your relationship with your child to change? Because the reality is that to protect children, we MUST look at what they are doing. This means we must learn how to operate their phone. You need to know how to use each app on the phone. How to access their folders and pictures. And then you must invest the time, weekly in the beginning for our young kids, doing random device checks. This is time-consuming. And the harsh reality is it will never feel like enough. You will always feel like you need to protect them more. And you will always wonder if they are doing things you cannot access and should not be doing.

Third, are you ready to set boundaries and rules around the device? You must do this to protect your child. Not just from others but from themselves. And, these boundaries must be established early. I encourage you to talk about kids before purchasing a phone or device. Because if the limits cannot be agreed upon, then it may not be time for a device in the home.

While all of this may sound exhausting and stressful, we must ensure we do what we can to protect our kids. If your gut feeling is that your kid is not ready for a device, it is okay to listen to that feeling. And to wait. They will survive. Maybe a “throwback” Christmas with toys that encourage time together is just what everyone needs.

Kristi Bush serves as a national education consultant and social media safety advocate. She is a licensed social worker with greater than 15 years of clinical practice and health care experience. She attended Troy and Auburn University where she studied social work and counseling. Kristi travels nationally and has spoken with thousands of children, parents, professionals and organizations about the benefits and threats associated with social media. You may reach Kristi through her website at www.knbcommunications.com.

Does it feel like your kids already have more toys than they could ever want? I love the holidays and the spirit of gift-giving, but every year, I wonder what toys my kids could possibly want and where they will go in our already crowded home. Experience gifts are a great gift option that has benefits for kids, parents, and other gift-givers.

Here are some excellent experience gift ideas for every child on your list.

One of my family’s favorite gifts is seasonal passes to local attractions. This saves us money and encourages us to get out, enjoy our city, and make memories along the way. Some attractions to consider are zoo admission, a local museum, amusement park tickets, or swimming season passes to the area pool.

Subscription box

A subscription box is a great gift idea especially for tweens and teens who are hard to buy for. They are now available for any age, interest, and price range. So if your child loves science, reading, art, games, or sports, chances are there is a subscription box that will fit their interests.

Classes and camps

Consider giving the gift of prepaid classes or camps that fit your child’s interest. Some ideas include dance, gymnastics, sports, cooking, art, or music. Classes and camps can be expensive but are worth the money and allow kids to try something new.

Travel

Consider combining your holiday and vacation budget by taking a family trip. Whether it’s an overnight trip to a nearby indoor water park or a cross-country trip, traveling is a great way to expose your child to different places and build family memories simultaneously.

Tickets to a favorite sporting event, concert, or show is a great idea for a gift for the whole family. Combine the gift with a T-shirt to wear to the event or a backstage tour to make the day more memorable.

Box it up

If your budget is a little smaller, try putting together several things in a box for your child to enjoy. For example, create a movie box with a movie or video rental gift card, candy, popcorn, and a warm blanket so the family can enjoy a movie night at home. Combine art supplies, sketchbooks, paints, and other craft items for an art box. You could also put together a cooking box, ingredients for homemade playdough with cookie cutters, or a gardening box with seeds, gloves, and tools. Get creative and combine your child’s interests to create a customized package.

Adventure gifts

For the adventurous child, look for experience gifts that give them a chance to try something they wouldn’t usually get to do. Some ideas could include horseback riding, fishing, camping, rock climbing, indoor skydiving, or a day at a gym with an obstacle course or trampolines.

With an experience gift, your child will create great memories while enjoying something they may not have had the opportunity to try otherwise. A bonus is that there is no need to store the item after the child has grown tired of playing with it. rrp

Sarah Lyons is a freelance journalist and contributing writer.