KHAYA NDZINGANI
There is Beauty in the Madness An inquiry into modernity
First published by Khaya Ndzingani 2020 Copyright Š 2020 by Khaya Ndzingani There is Beauty in the Madness by Khaya Ndzingani is licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike (CC BY-NC-SA) 4.0. To view a copy of this license, visit https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/4.0
Disclaimer: You are free to download, share and remix this work if you attribute it to Khaya Ndzingani, but you may not use it in any way for commercial use. First edition ISBN: 978-0-620-88034-3 Editing by Teboho Moleko Advisor: Avril Walters Cover art by DesignNext This book was professionally typeset on Reedsy. Find out more at reedsy.com
To humanity
Contents Preface
iii
Acknowledgement
vii
1
Surely This Is Madness
1
2
Survival above All Else
3
3
Picture Me
5
4
In Pursuit of Greatness
6
5
Take What Is Yours
7
6
Forever Ambitious
8
7
The Scriptures of Success
9
8
The Dream Imagined
10
9
Chasing the Greatness of Things
11
10 The Prisoner of Opportunity
12
11 Did You See It for Yourself?
13
12 To Pursue or Experience Happiness
14
13 The Prisoner of Dreams
15
14 Did You Miss It?
17
15 Always at War, the Enemy Camps at the Gate
18
16 Inflicting Pain to Self
19
17 In Good Times, Let the Brandy Flow
20
18 The Legacy Left Behind
22
19 To Have or Not to Have
24
20 Bearing Arms against the Madness
25
21 Cogs within the Machine
27
22 The Gift and Curse of Desire
28
23 The States of Things
29
24 Seeing beyond Its Surface
30
25 The Beauty in the Madness
31
26 The World Consumes Us All
33
27 Hardships Are but your Own Doing?
34
28 Let it Be
35
29 Blessings Come to All
36
30 The Nature of Purpose
37
31 Secure in the States of Things
39
Collaborate with Us
41
I See You
42
Preface
An enquiry into mental health and wellbeing in modernity. Suffering is not unique to this generation.
Rather, it is an
inescapable part of human existence. Humanity has always been confronted with suffering, often rooted in mental affliction, but one can’t help shake the feeling that we are witnessing a rise in the levels of dissatisfaction, anxiety, stress and depression. Is this the result of humanity reaching record levels of production and consumption? People are still advocating for an equitable society built on opportunity, merit, freedom, choice, justice, compassion, and expression but there seems to be something amiss. For all the economic progress and “freedoms” of society, what is it about modernity that is causing humanity prolonged suffering, where we sacrifice our mental health and wellbeing in the pursuit of life? An augmented reality. Reality in modernity is augmented using seductive language, making it harder to distinguish between what it is, or is not. Today, the emphasis on how to accomplish anything is placed on the individual, meaning success is seen as dependent on one’s initiative. This dominant worldview places every person’s actions at the centre of their outcomes and everyone is expected to follow this way of thinking. It shapes the meaning and pathway of life, and in accepting it, we forgo the opportunity to iii
craft our own meaning and pathway to fulfilment. The willing acceptance of this perspective is made easier through the use of seductive language. The nature of this language can inspire us into action but is also too elusive to grasp. Often poetic, it lures us into putting everything on the line to accumulate and consume to satisfy the void created in accepting the dominant. It was never ours to begin with, but we covet it as if it were our own. As poetic as it is, rarely do we ask, “what does this mean for me?� These whispers of sweet nothings blind us from reality (what it is!), pushing us to fall for the illusion of what we feel it ought to be. Pursuing, the madness constantly follows. We heighten our suffering by pursuing this alluring yet unattainable augmented reality. We pursue it with little questioning, yet more often than not, we fall short of the allure. Not matching up to the images of an augmented reality in our lived experiences, whether it be the accumulation of wealth and all the things attached to it, the perfect career, the highest level of education, or a world stamp of approval accompanied by fame or acclaim, we often view ourselves as inadequate. This augmentation of reality permeates into how we view ourselves, the types of interactions and experiences we share with friends, the ideals we have of partners, and even the expectations we place on our children. This pursuit inevitably sets us up for failure. We constantly perceive ourselves and those around us as failures when compared against the backdrop of an augmented reality. Failing to realise that this is a distortion of the lived experience, we hold on to every negative feeling about ourselves, others and our lived experiences. Stuck in the loop of being drawn in, and iv
then falling short of the allure, again and again. We put our metal health and wellbeing on the line in constant pursuit of the perfect, unaware that something has to give. Which will break first, the dominant view or our wellbeing and peace of mind? It is in these moments when the madness comes for us, affecting our state of mind beyond the levels of suffering reality. There is little rest from the dominant worldview. Though not new, today the augmentation of reality is perhaps more widespread and intensified. Whether it be advertisers selling products or individuals augmenting their personal brands on Instagram, at virtually every point we are bombarded with seductive language, usually accompanied by the perfect picture. With the constant reminder of our disappointments, we tend to relentlessly inflict pain on ourselves and others, screaming “the world is not fair!” or “why always me?” The unintended effect of this torment is losing the ability to put the good, neutral or bad into perspective. This dulling of the perceptive sense interferes with our activity of thinking, clouding our perception of ourselves and the world; choosing to only see our shortcomings, failures and mistakes. The soul becoming heavy, dark and numb. Seeing the beauty: revitalising the perceptive sense. Your perception of reality drives your experience of beauty. This perception can be cultivated through eternal knowledge. As revealed by Irish poet and philosopher, John O’Donohue, “beauty is the illumination of your soul.” The illumination captures the feeling of joy that arises from within when something or someone is exposed to the senses. Connecting with the inner self and revitalising the perceptive v
sense will help you pierce through the illusion and remove the veil of seduction. In doing so, one better experiences the beauty inside and around. This has been known by holy men and women, spiritual teachers, sages, philosophers, and in-tune layman throughout the ages. However, modernity encourages us to seek out the latest paradigms that occupy modern thought, pushing us to abandon eternal knowledge. We are often told through indirect messaging that the lack of prosperity is at the centre of our suffering. Surely this is madness? Scarcely are we given eternal knowledge which is intuitive and arises from the divine and the inner self, knowledge which is easily understood across the ages. It is for this reason that There is Beauty in the Madness addresses the human condition of suffering by nourishing the soul, connecting to the intangible and revitalising the perceptive sense. Drawing from and meditating on African spirituality, Christianity, Islam, Buddhism, Taoism, and Stoicism, eternal knowledge that has been realised by many people from different parts of the world, across the ages. We hope this eternal knowledge will sharpen your perception, and then perhaps one can come to realise that maybe there is beauty in the madness.
vi
Acknowledgement
To the Creator, uMdali, known by many names. Kaggen, Atum, Ra, Brahma, Yaweh, Allah, Ngai, Mwari, Thioab, Mvelincanti, Modimo, Qamata, Thixo and Jehovah. Praise and thanksgiving for everything! To the messengers and prophets of the Creator, Moshe, Jedidiah, Loa Tze, SiddhÄ rtha Gautama, Yeshua of Nazareth and Muhammad ibn Abdullah, whose teachings I continually draw from. Peace, love, joy and compassion be with us all. To the Lemurians and abaLozi, who provide spiritual guidance, divine revelations and inspiration, and protection from above. To the land, we draw great power, refuge and sustenance from it, and one day returning to replenish it. Let us always remember, the land does not belong to us, but we belong to the land. To the blood that runs in me. We are a diverse people: The San, the first nation, the KhoeKhoe, the men of men The Bantu, the Reeds People The wandering Masai, the Swati, amaBhaca The Xhosa, the abaThembu The Great Kalanga, the baSotho, the Bataung. vii
To the Kingship of uDzana, Khatsini, Mkhuma omnandi njenge zambane, Ncwabe, Mayeye, Mfuphi, Kaliphi, Ngxabalala, Simamkele, Nkushubana, Bhaca, Ngcofela. Ndzingani. To ooNdala kaMomamana, Mncotshe, Msunu, Sdumbu, Thole, Ngxunga, Smukumuku, Ndithinina, Kwesamathole, Mnange, Krili, Mtyeshela, Smukumuku, Mandiyeke, Urhama ngezembe ngenxa yoswela amalweyile. Mbhenge. To ooRadebe, Bhungane, Mtimkhulu, Ndlebentle’zombini, Makhulukhulu, Mafuz’afulele njengelifu lemvula, Mashabada owashwabadel’inkomo nempondo zayo, Mbucwa, Zikode, Sbhushwana, Ngelengele. Bulana. To bo Mokubung oa Tsatsi oa Choechoe, re sekhoja, kubu ntsha marota re bone, kubu e kana ka ntlo ea Moseme, tse nyane li ae sesa, tse kholo li tabola Maliba, re khomo ea metsi, ha e thule ka manaka e thula ka phatla, ke khomo e thjitja. To the lay teachers Ofenste Molefe, Tshiamo Tsogang and Teboho Banele Moleko who were revealed in different stages of the journey and helped draw revelations from within and around. Thank You.
viii
Forever wanting. The madness arises.
ix
1
Surely This Is Madness
Shoot for the moon, aim for the stars. Always grasping beyond your reach, this is the path to greatness. Never stopping to breathe, never settling to appreciate that which is in your care. Never quitting. Give no quarter, leave no ground unturned, your destiny is in your hands. Do it all and make it possible. Your potential is great and beyond everyone, you are the special one shining brighter than others. Never being content, the ordinary not good enough, always wanting more; a sign of ambition. How alluring yet elusive, but what does it mean? Pushing yourself to the limits, anything less is settling. Attaching the accumulation of things and titles to the status of self, not having bringing great despair. Always following the allure of the world, wanting to buy more and more, never recognising enough. The world keeps selling, German engineering is joy, a holiday to Bali is peace; always buying. Buying it all, emptiness comes, staying busy, sleeping when you are dead. Surely this is madness?
1
THERE IS BEAUTY IN THE MADNESS
Recognising the poetic nature of the allure and elusiveness of the world, you see it for what it is. Noticing the contradiction of accumulation, you are aware of the madness that follows with it. The car is a car, nothing more nothing less, able to appreciate the beauty without seeing yourself in it. Detaching accumulation of things to value, open to receive it as it comes, appreciating its use. Aware the machine makes profit. Joy and peace are cultivated and experienced, not prepackaged for sale. Filled with wealth from within, resting as needed, aware if one no longer wakes, it is no longer sleep.
2
2
Survival above All Else
The laws of the jungle dictate to all, the fittest shall survive, the meek shall perish. Where there was savannah, forest or mountains now lies high risers and concrete structures. Return to instinct, be the lion, eat or be eaten. The decision to be King is now yours. Knowing the rules of the game, rise to the top of the food chain, take life around you. Be the hunter of dreams, devouring as much as possible in sight, for you and your offspring. But returning to the watering hole, you see a reflection of a man, not a lion, mouth covered in blood. Upon seeing the unrecognisable to self; try console the spirit with things, for is this the face of survival? Recognising we are all human, you give life to all! Harvesting what has been made available to you. Mindfully gathering that which brings life but leaving behind for others, knowing others too seek life. Knowing there is enough in the world, unconcerned about hunting others, remaining true to self. Recognising 3
THERE IS BEAUTY IN THE MADNESS
all humanity, mindful that the ground must be replenished, nurtured for those to come.
4
3
Picture Me
Do you enjoy the picture or seeing yourself in it? For after all, the view is what it is, beautiful or unpleasant. Nothing needed, nothing taken away. In your daydreams, do you see it for yourself? The mind wandering away from what it is, in the state of possession. For the time being, cherishing the absent. As you are, did you experience the moment? Seeing it for what it is, no desire to possess or alter. Present mind, mindful body.
5
4
In Pursuit of Greatness
Be great, for if you work hard and are patient, never giving up, it comes. Never settling for what is in front of your eyes, reaching beyond your grasp. In more and more things, it will come. True greatness is achieved. Roll up your sleeves and get to it. Zoned in, you blank out everything around you, focused on the prize. Nothing else matters, busy in patience, taking destiny in your own hands. Others let life take its course, walking the many paths in front of them. Wide open to experience, looking at the entire picture, aware it is a journey. The prize doesn’t matter, mindfully nurturing, unconcerned by getting but receiving as it comes.
6
5
Take What Is Yours
Take what is yours, for it is due to you and you alone. A better life to those in full chase, charging towards the prize. The time is now, the opportunity is here, never again to present itself. Diminishing the appetite for failure, one chance presents itself to you. Crippled that all may be lost before it has been fully realised, you never let live. With no fault of yours, you do what you know best, carefully running towards it. Conscious that failure is the other side which informs success, it brings you no trouble. Liberated that it is a snapshot of the journey, knowing it is not the entire path, rather part of the cycle. Aware your mistakes prepare for what is to come, you let live, waiting for what’s next. Receiving as it comes, not consumed by taking. Effortlessly moving closer to it.
7
6
Forever Ambi ous
Forever driven by never ending ambition, but for how long? The sky is the limit, the world is at your feet. Envisioning beyond what already is, keep moving and make it happen. In dreaming, for a moment we die, unwittingly killing the natural self. Inattentive to the here and now, what already is present to take care – only an afterthought. Inspired in the absent, disillusioned with the current. Returning to the natural self, alive in the intended, breathing life into nature. Being as you are and allowing what will be, centered body, mind and spirit. Secure, grateful for every passing breath.
8
7
The Scriptures of Success
Attain the knowledge of success in the world and it can never be taken away, it now belongs to you. For it is known, the mind is the key to success, so in constant education, transform your life. File the key to unlock opportunity at every turn, opening the doors of success. Unrelenting in learning what the world knows, dressed in the veil of secrecy, only for a few to attain. Rooted in the absolute knowledge of fame and riches, secure in worldly secrets to unlock your future. Persistently filing the mind, are the grooves not blunted; is it still your key? Accepting what is from within, what rests with you arises and reveals itself. Now open to the realisation of obscure knowledge, aware of the relative truths of life and spirit. Not of the world revealed, the veil of success removed, the door opened to return to the center.
9
8
The Dream Imagined
The dream imagined is within your grasp, chase it, for it deserves every tool in your disposal. In all your effort, you can achieve it. Knowing that your destiny is in your hands and yours alone, chase it. Pursuing this happiness, what is in your grasp is never let go for hands to rest. Never bending, breaking, or folding, unrelenting in what was promised, forever busy. Something has to give, so you put the body, mind and soul on the line, giving way for the dream. Honouring the true self, happiness allowed to manifest from within, without effort. Letting go of the ideas that belong to the world, you close the eyes and ears and dull the touch. In this stillness, it organically reveals itself and the spirit recognises it, for it is a part of you.
10
9
Chasing the Greatness of Things
More and more, never settling for anything else but only greatness deserved. Elevated position, many things in possession, great admiration bestowed. Moving upwards, on top of the world and everyone in it. Unhappy in our current position, wanting what others have for ourselves, we work. Climbing the ladders of greatness, in a rush competing to the top. Toiling and never resting, whatever it takes. Betraying the true self. Accepting the states of things, understanding things change and are not entitled by action. Conscious that the greatness of the world belongs to the machine, rather choosing life. Nurturing and rejuvenating; we do what is required, honouring the true self.
11
10
The Prisoner of Opportunity
Take what is yours for it is due to you, and you alone can do with it as you please. A better life to those up for the chase, correct attitude and unwavering in pursuit. The time never so primed, the opportunity is now, never to present itself again. Rising to the challenge, the chance in front is all but in your hands. Crippled by fear that it will pass forever, the thought that all you possess may be lost. Through no fault of yours, you become a prisoner of opportunity. Stuck in the moment already ceased. Understanding that opportunity is random and comes back around, it arises again whenever, however. Without effort and fuss, you do the work that comes natural to you in flow, without thought of chance. Liberated that it is but a cycle in different states and conditions. Correct chance drawn to your work.
12
11
Did You See It for Yourself?
Everything can be yours if you can see beauty in it. Surely it can belong to you? With right work and attitude, pursue it, constantly busy and envisioning it. Precious things and high acclaim, stay busy for this is what you deserve. And then you saw it without it being revealed to you or placed in your care. For you were constantly looking at others, the robes were worn with grace and the house fit for a crown. That which was not wanted is now desired, yesterday’s desires long forgotten. When you closed your eyes, did you see it for yourself worn with the same grace as others? Without looking it crossed your eye and you saw it, and then you looked at it. Away from comparing it, you saw it on its own, grateful it was revealed, present to it. You saw it for what it is, not turning it into something else. Aware it is what it is. Fully awake, you saw the beauty in it, appreciating it for what it is for, unconcerned who owned it.
13
12
To Pursue or Experience Happiness
Eternally pursuing happiness, does it last forever once grasped? Beyond the horizon you can see it, it is yours – take it. Coming to those who are brave enough to seek it, in sweat and blood. Constantly changing; what made you happy as an infant is no more. Coming in the form of the things that please the age, so we work to attain things. Grafting to add and to become; pursuing the goal which forever changes with growth. Understanding change is to know pleasures of yesterday change with us. Today is today and it too soon will be yesterday, so we live in the moment. Experiencing it here and now, thereafter ceasing; grateful it came, never truly ours forever.
14
13
The Prisoner of Dreams
The world of the dreaming, filled with paradoxes, driven by success yet conflicted with purpose. Toiling the day away, chasing what is desired, lying awake at night, consumed by what is destined. Rest has become an afterthought, yet sleep has deserted you. Is this what dreams are made of? Armed with ambition and well thought out plans, we chase great fame or fortune. We think of the change only we can deliver to make a better world, our righteous work adorned. You have seen it in your vision, anything short of it is a failure of works or blessings. Inadequate in the present, yet anxious about the future. Have we not become prisoners of our dreams? Familiar with enough, allowing life to take its course, we give what is required while we wait. Knowing every contribution from the many brings about change, content with the part we played. Free from what it is supposed to look like, alive with possibility from what has already been done. Success and purpose seen with every step, recognising what is achieved; 15
THERE IS BEAUTY IN THE MADNESS
finally freed from the dream?
16
14
Did You Miss It?
Ask and receive that you desire, for blessings come when matched with adequate faith and works. Return to the old ways of your forefathers, uncompromising in instruction of ritual and offerings. For it is said, those who prospered and were not touched by sickness of body and mind were steadfast. Even in doings of the spirit, forever busy and consumed – in prayer and offerings – asking for the world. What care do ancestors and greater beings have for Versace robs and all things glittering? Unmindfully practicing, concerned by form. Missing blessings of observance bestowed in spirit. Attentive to spirit, constantly present and in tune with that which is greater. Always mindful, you hold the space, not fixated on the offering and the pomp of rituals. The substance is dense and the essence pure. The blessing recognised when revealed.
17
15
Always at War, the Enemy Camps at the Gate
The world and those who live in it are out to get us all. In the way of our dreams and things that bring happiness and peace. Hold your ground and fight, never wavering. The Great War is here. Always at war and fighting with the world, constantly looking for the enemy, at war with life and time. Not knowing peace, calling your God and those who walk in front of you to bear arms for you. The great enemy is at your doorstep, setting camp at the gate, the world is here. The walls are surrounded, laying siege to the mind and soul, always at war. Experiencing calm and peace in the world, you realise that you are at war with yourself. The enemy is inside, dormant or active, arising when the world is pursued, ceasing when the mind is still. Letting go of strategy and the tactics of the world, there is no need to outwit it. Being at ease with what is and the nature of the world, peace arises to quell the warrior spirit. 18
16
Inflic ng Pain to Self
Anything short of perfection is failure, reducing shortcomings to entire self, feeling unworthy. Always short of others, diminishing which is already a part of you, always lacking in comparison. Wanting to remove from the self, purging all that is imperfect, hating what is already there. Caught in the view on how you should or shouldn’t be, falling short of perfection, inflicting pain to self. Aware perfection is unattainable, knowing every aspect exists in self, understanding this is complete. Appreciating the virtues that tend the spirit, celebrating them when recognised, a part of everyone. Acknowledging your short comings, managing them as they arise. Taking time to know thyself. Aware life happens to all, remaining still, feeling you are whole in existence, not minding what happens.
19
17
In Good Times, Let the Brandy Flow
Double malts, triple distilled; let the brandy flow, this is the drink of success; aged to perfection. The good times are here, for yesterday we suffered for we only had water dulling our tongues. Laughter and cheers fill the air, the sound of accomplishment, enjoyed when pockets are full. Shared for good times, suffering kept to self. Many around, still loneliness follows, the drinks are here. As long as you’re buying, celebrating or brooding, the senses dulled, the mind loose, relief soon arrives. Staggering to bed, for a moment forgetting the way. Lost in the ad selling pleasures of success. Morning comes, the soul is low, the body thirsts. Will what made me sick make me better? Enjoying life, all is shared with others, when spending time alone, loneliness is a stranger here. Water is in abundance, sharing and replenishing, soul is heightened, body is balanced. Waking to a new day, the healing and cleansing is drank, aware that this sustains life. Evening arrives, appreciating the day 20
IN GOOD TIMES, LET THE BRANDY FLOW
spent, sober mind aware that water brings out the flavour of brandy.
21
18
The Legacy Le Behind
In pursuit of the world and everything in it, give it your all, leaving nothing behind for ourselves or others. Labouring for those we love, for the things we love. Not being present, accumulating inheritance for kin. Far removed from others, constantly adding things to the house one day built. Does this feel like home? So, preparing for what we know is coming, death always at the doorstep, waiting for everyone. Ready to do anything to provide and achieve one’s potential, robbing the living of time spent. Things and accolades accumulated on their behalf – will do for company. Leaving things behind so they too can go on, PlayStations console their hearts, TV’s soothe their souls. Aware breath of life ceases, every passing moment is appreciated, one day returning from where it came. Doing as required to sustain and nurture around us, taking care, gifting time for ourselves and others. Memories and teachings experienced with others, conscious that those are left behind, forever kept. When 22
THE LEGACY LEFT BEHIND
it is time, breath leaves body, the spirit lives on in hearts and minds, cherished endlessly.
23
19
To Have or Not to Have
Good things can come to those who do nothing, wait or work. This holds true about bad things; this is the nature of things. It was this way before we came to be and will remain so long after. Constantly doing, we forever yearn to have, to achieve the heart’s desire. So, to have, one remains still, waits, or works to gain the reward. And not to have, one remains still, waits or works, punished by the world. Accepting it as it is, we let go, take care, receive, and knowing enough is enough. So, one remains still, waits, and works for self and others, no reward or punishment in end. Understanding to have or not have, is only a comparison of states of possession.
24
20
Bearing Arms against the Madness
Looking to conquer the world, the ruler of vast lands is both feared and respected, breeding many titles. Strategising to expand far and wide, acquiring all things precious, forever taking, the world is yours. Remaining ahead of everyone else, fighting every battle everywhere, always in the mind. The enemy brings all hardships, plotting to take it all from you. Fight back hard, the world is coming. Restless and constantly fighting, peace coming in the form of things, neither having state or things. Calling upon the universe and those who walk below, for what? To wage war against the world. Everything and everyone against you, the madness pursued is coming for you. Never resigned to the states and what it is, always bearing arms in the conquest of what exactly? Resting and experiencing peace, you wait out the storm which always ceases, preparing for the next. During troubled waters, recognising and feeling the moment which passes, never owning for yourself. Seeking refuge from within to what is experienced, 25
THERE IS BEAUTY IN THE MADNESS
recognised from a different time, the friend never left. Accepting that life happens, no need to fight the world. Rather, negotiating peace with what is.
26
21
Cogs within the Machine
Unaware, the machine manifests a life of its own. By design, churning out that we desire, it is fit for purpose. And when the day ends, without fuss and worry it, it rests but never sleeps. Forever busy, the little woman working the machine can forget the breath of life. Betraying her nature, serving the machine, and overlooking her well-being. Forgoing her purpose, becoming a cog in the machine, a slave to its desire. Aware, she recognises that the machine is only but a system of dispensable parts. So, she stays true, knowing the machine is but a tool of the world. Alive in her virtue, taking care of what is indispensable to self. Life!
27
22
The Gi and Curse of Desire
Driven by desire, the blessing can consume and burden. Either when delivered or undelivered, is it but a gift and a curse of yearning. Is it not enough to be here, receiving as it comes and letting go what never came? The desired blessing delivered can satisfy the body, mind, and spirit, but for how long? Fulfilling that we desire then, pondering on more, separating us from what is now enough. Always busy, weighed down by what we have, consumed by what we do not. The desired blessing undelivered can leave the body, mind, and spirit disappointed. Leaving us empty, pondering on what was not, separating us from what is now enough. Once again, consumed or burdened by both what we have or do not.
28
23
The States of Things
It is what it is, before that, it was; after that, it will be – yet to become. All three states and those between them, cycling around each other. Acting together as one, no different from each other, only a reflection of the states of things. All over the place, away from the center, I didn’t have, I don’t have, I must have. Mind focused on the possession, away from the continually changing states. Never accepting it as it was, is or might be, reflecting on what is desired. Centre your mind to understand the nature of the states of things. Reflect on what it is, for it brings light to the state it occupies, accepting it changes. Understanding this, letting go of what was, taking care of what is, alive to the possibilities of what will be.
29
24
Seeing beyond Its Surface
How crafty the machine has become, luring the eye to focus on the surface. Drawing us away from what it is, mind creating an illusion. The machine always true to its nature, the aesthetics drawing us to the idea presented. The searching mind, moves the eye without thought, landing on what it desires. Attaching all notions of the world and admiration of others to it. Equating the thing to glory of the life, elevating above its purpose. The still mind knows the eye lands on what pleases it. Center the spirit, now look. Quietly observing, recognising its nature and state, revealed beyond its surface. Coming to know its purpose, appreciating its use, recognising the illusion.
30
25
The Beauty in the Madness
The World forever moving, never resting on one’s laurels or risk getting stuck, keep running the race. Planning every step, burning the midnight oil, rising early to catch the worm, always staying ahead. Thoughts of rest arise, remind yourself why you do it, imagine sipping cocktails by the beach house. Maybe paying off, one day buying back freedom and peace of mind. Worth the pain when finally arrived. Never here, thinking ahead, ironically stuck in traffic. Patience has deserted you, agitated you are here. Fixated on arriving, now punishing yourself for being late. Everyone in a rush but moving slow. For a moment, clearly seeing that this is madness, recognising that this is not it, feeling trapped in it. Wishing for escape, dreaming of your happy place, white beaches, and lush forest; the picture of peace. Sound of raging hooters, bringing you back to the chaos, a reminder that everyone is trying to get there. For survivals sake, you keep moving, the madness pushing you towards the machine. Again blinded!
31
THERE IS BEAUTY IN THE MADNESS
Where you are, presently alive; slowly moving with the traffic, leaving the rush behind, moving closer. Open to see it, through your window, can you see the trees remain still but sway with the calm? Did you look towards the horizon and see the birds float towards the sky? Lone bee doing as required, gathering, still guiding others to the smell of spring, aware the hive is one. Synchronising senses to life around, slowing down, noticing the splendor; a sight reserved for peace. Chaos thriving, the world in a rush to get there on time. But did you see the beauty in the madness?
32
26
The World Consumes Us All
The world consumes and then we die, but to what end? We turn the ground and work towards having. And as we toil for gain, the moment passes but the world continues. We labour until the seasons circle around, our toil bears fruits for harvest. It has now become our own, we consume, and it diminishes. Now the stomach is full, body is strong, self is satisfied but for how long? We are here and living, mindfully nurturing what already is in our care. Aware that it was never ours, attaining as needed, later replenished. Then, the mind is empty and the spirit is still, living and open to the present moment.
33
27
Hardships Are but your Own Doing?
Outcome is a result of action? Is this the law of the world, getting what is due by effort? Our conditions in the world matching all done before us, determining our futures. So, with right effort and attitude, pick yourself up, take charge of situation, vanquish strife. Hard times come; the mind is troubled, the world returning that you put in. Brooding in your thoughts, consumed by what was done and that which was not. With a heart so heavy, owning burdens which come. Why always me? Aloof from the world, understanding the nature of things; hardships arise and cease repeatedly. A thousand years before and after you, this is nature; the experience of the living, beyond man’s laws. Aware that it does not belong to you but a current state; the other side ceased, will once more arise.
34
28
Let it Be
Troubled times arrive, the rain brings the storm, clouds concealing the stars, hiding the path home. The merchant ship filled with precious cargo, carrying the dreams invested and on board but lost at sea. Now more than ever, the ship needs a busy alert captain, fighting against the rage sinking our hopes. Always resisting the circumstances placed at your feet, the world keeps testing, struggling against life. Latching on to what is seen for you, the machine always selling life, burdened by what needs to change. The storm lasts forever, unmoved that troubles subside, in your feelings, calmness deserts the ship. Learning to float with the raging sea, resisting the urge to always paddle against the flow, calm arises. Releasing things desired, which aren’t ours but belong to someone else. A lighter load, easily floating. The message in the bottle washes up ashore without effort, worry or control, it gets there after the storm.
35
29
Blessings Come to All
In different forms, blessings come to all, to those in need and those in abundance. Some earned in individual toil or nurture, others unearned through grace of others. In gratitude, take it for what it is, a gift for use, nothing more, nothing less. By action, some toil, others nurture, through works it is achieved. In material, it manifests in physical form; seen by the naked eye. Receive it all but resist from turning it into what it is not, a reward or symbol of good action. In stillness, some wait and remain idle, through perspective it reveals itself. By spirit, it is there, forever intangible and seen by the cultivated mind and centered soul. Understand its virtue, resist from turning it into what it is not, a reward or symbol of good action.
36
30
The Nature of Purpose
It’s all but a matter of time, ready for you to take control, the search starts and must have an ending. And then found, your life preparation has met opportunity, your journey now has a starting point. Now ready to answer questions so long on mind. The purpose revealed in one moment. Weighed down in the mind by finding it, wanting to know, understand, see, and own it; is it yours? Seeking the goodness to be carried by you alone, changing the world and all that is wrong. Driven by finding future actions for the greater good, robbing the present of what is there. Obsessed in building a “new” future in a lifetime, ready to see the results of all action, glory all yours. Aware that purpose is purpose, not knowing form and time; it is continuous and forever existing. Conscious that we are interconnected, purpose binding us all together, carried out through us. Secure that every contribution sustains the chain, it’s not for us to see, to keep or revel in. Unconcerned by knowing 37
THERE IS BEAUTY IN THE MADNESS
the objectives and seeing the outcome, is this the nature of purpose?
38
31
Secure in the States of Things
If it is meant to be, it already is and soon it shall pass, becoming was; circling around each other. One and the same thing, different states. With this revelation, let it be known that it is already done. Nothing required except to be and to walk the path laid towards the destination already reached. Constantly haunted by the past and consumed with the future, time to act has become limited. The past responsible for the present, your actions ready to determine the future, results of your doings. Robbing yourself of the moment, take control of all states, a prisoner of the past, a hostage of the future. Present, you are secure in the states of things; understanding time is but a marker of the states. Realising that the states simultaneously exist together, intertwined, moving as one in their own way. Experiencing the moment, free from taking absolute control; doing as required, the journey is enjoyed. ### 39
Recognising enough. The madness ceases.
40
Collaborate with Us
Has There is Beauty in the Madness evoked any familiar or unfamiliar thoughts? Provide your take of the madness or beauty in life by sharing: digital illustrations, narrations, poetry, a short story, music, dance, photography or even a meme; however you reimagine it. All we ask is that you follow the Creative Commons Attribution guidelines and share online under the #tbitm Send an email to khaya.ndzingani@gmail.com for any queries or to share any insights or thoughts. There is Beauty in the Madness by Khaya Ndzingani is licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike (CC BY-NC-SA) 4.0. To view a copy of this license, visit https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/4.0 Disclaimer: You are free to download, share and remix this work if you attribute it to Khaya Ndzingani, but you may not use it in any way for commercial use.
41
I See You
It takes a village to write a book. Thank you, for all your time, teachings, inspiration, interactions, experiences, guidance, counsel, influence, care, compassion, and love in shaping these revelations. Abraham-Swarts, Carto Anna, Monde Atta, Komla Bobi, Manthona Bosche, Crezane Bulana, Francinah Bulana, Fundiswa Bulana, Grace Bulana, Lebo Bulana, Madoda Ceslar, Daniel Chandia, Beatrice Chipulu, Kaluba Christiensen, Peter Cishe, Andiswa Cishe, Azile Cishe, Bandla Cishe, Lubabalo Cishe, Pumeza 42
I SEE YOU
Cishe, Thabile Cishe, Ziyanda De Jongh, Derick Diwu, Anda Dlodlo, Zinzile Dube, Mandla Edwards, Ivana Gouws, Dan Gwele, Vuyisa Gwenxane, Chuma Kayango, Christine Kayango, Dan Kayongo, Patrick Klaas, Dalindyebo Klaas, Maxoba Klaas, Nomise Kondleka, Deon Lehabe, Lerato Lotter, Marensia Ludidi, Musa Madiba, Maurice Maduneni, Ntsikelelo Mahlangu, Simpiwe Mahlelela, Lebogang Mahome, Neo Majeke, Khaka Maqeda, Camagu Maqoko, Buhle Mathobela, Mandisa Mchunu, Siya Mdisthwa, Sandise 43
THERE IS BEAUTY IN THE MADNESS
Mdiya, Leon Mdluli, Musa Mofokeng, Lebogang Mokoena, Dikeledi Molefe, Ofenste Moleko, Lebohang Moleko, Leseli Moleko, Mike Moleko, Ntabiseng Moleko, Pearl Moleko, Teboho Moleko, Thabang Moloto, Kwena Mroleli, Lihleli Msimang, Sifiso Msizi, Ndileka Mujuru, Mathew Mukadam, Munaf Mumba, Chibale Munro, Johnny Mxhego, Siyambonga Ndlazi, Sandisiwe Ndzingani, Andiswa Ndzingani, Bandile Ndzingani, Bongani Ndzingani, Bongiswa Ndzingani, Fikile Ndzingani, Maphelo Ndzingani, Mfuneko Ndzingani, Noxolo Ndzingani, Qukeza 44
I SEE YOU
Ndzingani, Sinazo Ndzingani, Sindile Ndzingani, Sitembele Ndzingani, Thabile Ndzingani, Vuyisa Ndzingani, Zimbini Ndzingani, Zimkhita Nqandeka, Hombakazi Ntubuzi, Gugu Ntubuzi, Mandisa Ntuli, Keabetswe Pratt, Carrie Ramsunder, Vash Rupango, Kudakwashe Sibutha, Marvin Simon, Manuel Tema, Sifiso Thebe, Thabang Thekiso, Tankiso Tsatsi, Mapule Tsogang, Tshiamo Tyamzashe, Nomfundo van der Merwe, Ben Walters, Avril Welt, Fabian Wynne-Trollip, Edith
45
