TRANSITIONS MEDIATION
CONFLICT ASSESSMENT QUESTIONAIRRE 2017
DIVORCE BOOT CAMP ENGAGING THE PROCESS 1
1. Prior to engaging an attorney, what resources did you use to educate yourself about the divorce process? ______________ None ___________ Coparenting Website ______________ Website ___________ Kids First Parents Second ______________ Books ___________ Video/Youtube 2. What is your age (in range) ______________ 18-24
__________ 35-40
______________ 25-30
__________ 40-45
______________ 30-35
__________ 45 and beyond
3. How long did you know your spouse PRIOR to having children? ______________ 0-3 months
__________ 3-9 months
______________ 9 months to 2 years __________ 2 yrs to 5 yrs. 4. List the Highest Education level achieved _________________ High School _________________ GED _________________ Trade School _________________ College _________________ Masters/Doctorate 5. Prior to the Divorce, did you and your spouse engage in a marital therapist to work through differences in the marriage? _________________ Yes
_______________________ No
6. Did you and your spouse talk to your children about the divorce? _______________ Yes
________________ No
7. Are you paying /receiving support for your children based on a VOLUNTARY agreement you have with your spouse? ______________ _________________ Yes No 2
8. Are the children able to go see either parent after the separation? ________________ Yes _____________________ My Lawyer said Not to Allow it
_________________ No ___________________________________ My Lawyer said to wait for the temporary hearing
9. Three months PRIOR to the divorce what was your ability to work with your children’s other parent, with 10 being the greatest and 1 being the all time lowest. 1
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10. After the divorce started, what is your ability to work with your children’s other parent, with 10 being the greatest and 1 being the all time lowest. 1
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11. What is the level of understanding you believe you have in the legal process you will be involved in (with one being the greatest and one being the all time lowest). 1
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12. Before you begin the process, how important is it to you to be in control of the divorce process, with 10 being the greatest and 1 being the all time lowest.? 1
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13. Before you begin the process, how important was it to you to keep your children away from the legal process, with 10 being the greatest and 1 being the all time lowest. 1
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14. Do you believe that you have all the information needed for a judge to hear your case? ________________________ Yes
_________________________ No
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15. If your answer to Number 14 was in the affirmative, what additional information do you think the Judge needs before a ruling can be had in your case? _____________ Discovery _____________ Social Study _____________ Testing 16. Do you believe that divorce, in and of itself, hurts children? ________________ Yes
__________________ No
17. Do you believe that conflict in divorce hurts children? ________________ Yes
__________________ No
18. Do you believe that you are in need of resources to minimize conflict in your divorce? _______________ Yes _______________ No 19. Do you believe that a class that teaches you communication skills would be beneficial in your divorce process? ________________________ Yes
______________________ No
20. Would your answer to Question #16 change if the classes were for an extended period of time, say 3- 6 months. ________________________
_____________________
Yes
No
21. Ranking from 1 being the highest and 5 being the lowest - what are the level of priorities in your divorce? Privacy Cost Time Addressing Kids Needs Justice
_____________ _____________ _____________ _____________ _____________
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22. I need to go to a hearing to see a judge because: Ranking from 1 being the highest and 5 being the lowest priorities? Justice Win Money No other option Protect Kids
_____________ _____________ _____________ _____________ _____________
23. What are the factors that do not allow you to communicate with your ex? __________ Hurt Feelings (The Divorce) __________ Immaturity __________ Drug Usage __________ Mental Illness __________ Extended Family 24. Do you believe that your spouse is impaired, bi-polar or has other mental health issues that hinder your ability to communicate? ____________________ Yes
_________________ No
25. Do you believe that testing is necessary to determine if either spouse has a mental incapacity? ____________________ _________________ Yes No 26. Psychologists are an independent resource that parents can use to solve problems confronting their children. Do you believe that involving a psychologist would be beneficial to solving the problems confronting you in your divorce? _____________ Yes
______________ No
27. If mental health professionals can help you and your ex to work together to solve problems facing your child, would that be beneficial to you? _______________ Yes
_______________ Not interested
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CONFLICT ASSESSMENT 28. How Important is it to you to interact with your ex after the divorce? _____________________ None at all
_______________________________ We need to talk about the Kids Needs
_____________________ I’ll follow the court orders That’s it 29. Did you and your spouse attempt marriage counseling PRIOR to the divorce being filed? ____________ Yes
_________ No
30. Did you see a psychologist, LMFT or LPC to receive individual counseling when you began the divorce process? ____________ Yes
_________ No
31. Do you believe that the problems facing you in your divorce is simply based upon the fact that your child’s other parent will not LISTEN to your position? __________ Yes
_____________ No
32. Do you believe that the problem facing you in your divorce is based on the fact that your child’s other parent does not UNDERSTAND your position? ___________ Yes
_____________ No
33. Do believe that the problem facing you in your divorce is based on the fact that you and your child’s other parent are not EDUCATED on the issues affecting your child? ___________ Yes
____________ No
34. With 10 being the best and 1 being the worst, what level of communication do you share with your child’s other parent? 1
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35. Do you believe that you and your spouse simply need the issues ASSESSED by a neutral mental health professional to resolve the issues facing your dispute? ___________________ Yes
_____________________ No
36. Do you believe that you and your spouse need EDUCATION/SPECIALTRAINING on how to communicate with one another? _____________________ Yes
_________________ No
37. If your answer to question #3 was yes, please rate the level of training needed, with 10 being the most training needed and 1 being the least amount. 1
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38. Do you want your case being tried before a Family Law Judge? ___________
Yes
______________ No
39. How interested would you be in having your case being assigned to preemptive mediation PRIOR to having your case heard on a temporary orders hearing with 10 being the most interested needed and 1 being the least interested 1
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40. If you believe that a court should ultimately rule on your case. What is your decision based on? ___________ Going to Court Will Give me My Most favorable outcome ___________ There is simply no other option, I can not communicate with my ex ___________ There’s simply no other option, our children are in danger ___________ That’s How Divorces are Handled, right? ___________ That’s my lawyer’s call, not mine. 41. What is your opinion of the legal system, positive or negative? 7
________ ________ ________ ________
Judges are there to protect our children Judges are there to listen to my case and my feelings I hope I won’t need a Judge I’m scared about taking my case to a Judge, I don’t know why we just can’t work a settlement and be done with it.
42. Collaboration by definition is a team based approach where everyone puts their ideas out there and through a collective process problems are solved. Do you think that you would benefit from a team based approach to the problems facing you in your divorce? __________ Yes
____________ No
43. If you answer to #38 was NO, would it be beneficial for you to seek an evaluative position on your case PRIOR to trial, something similar to a cost/benefit assessment? ___________
Yes
__________
No\
44. If you answer to #38 was NO, do you believe that you and your wife have the necessary communication skills required to work through your dispute? ___________
Yes
__________
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No
PICKING YOUR MEDIATION TYPE 45. Have you ever heard of Mediation? ________ Yes
________ No
46. If your answer was yes, do you know that there are different types of mediation? ________Yes
_________ No
47. Do you think mediation would help your case? _________________ Yes
_____________________ No
If you believe that mediation would be beneficial, please answer #36. 48. Evaluative Mediation is a process that allows you to determine who has the best POSITION prior to coming to court. Parties strengths and weaknesses are evaluated and agreements are reached based upon their legal case. Problem Solving Mediation is a process that allows parents the opportunity to engage mental health professionals and the mediator to PROBLEM SOLVE their way through the divorce process. Transformative Mediation is a process that allows parents the ability to communicate between themselves with the mediator. The mediation is directed by the parents who (we suggest) communicate through the mediator on skype or zoom. _______________ Evaluative
_____________ Problem Solving
_________________ Transformative
THIS QUESTIONAIRRE WAS PREPARED BY TRANSITIONS MEDIATION 2017
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