Lessons Learned: Reflections from a Retiring Lawyer

LESSONS LEARNED: REFLECTIONS FROM A RETIRING LAWYER By: John Eldridge

KINDNESS

In the Practice of law, there are certain practices within the Practice that will serve you well, and the greatest of these is kindness. Kindness is the trait that makes the practice of law enjoyable.

You have the heard the expression, “Kill them with kindness.” Well, it works. No difficult situation was ever made better by returning evil to the evil that has been done to you, but most every difficult situation gets better when, instead of evil for evil, you respond with kindness to the evil before you.

Everyone wants to be treated with kindness; it is human nature. So, why do we not do what we know we should? I will go out on a limb here and assert that we are not kind because we are stressed. We don’t have time to be kind. There is too much to do, and that deadline looms.

I have known people who use every encounter with another person, regardless of who it is, to try to bring a ray of sunshine into that other person’s day. That is, they look for some common ground or how they can inject a little humor here, or how can help be given. When you see a smile, a grin, a laugh, these rare people have injected some sunshine on someone else. I deeply admire that ability to enhance others’ days, and when I can, I try to practice just that.

Does practicing kindness pay off? If you are kind, will it make for a meaningful law practice? I learned early in my career that the deputy clerks that enable the machinery of the courthouse to flow smoothly are a wonderful source of help, especially to a beginning lawyer. And to the lawyer in practice for a while, these deputy clerks probably know more about their court and their judges than you do! Smile. Be kind.

Say a thoughtful word. Such actions bring their own reward and may even get you a referral.

Remember Plato’s old adage: “Treat everyone with kindness, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” How true!

I also learned that kindness to your fellow attorney also pays off. A lawyer who is always kind will not be avoided. In fact, it will be the kind lawyer who gets his phone message moved to the top of the heap. A lawyer who is kind will get a judge to be more lenient with her. A lawyer who is kind will find that she gets more referrals; no one wants to be represented by a meanie.

Kindness to others is the grease that makes the practice of law enjoyable; use kindness every day, all day long!