Grammar Grinch

GRAMMAR GRINCH By: Sarah M. Booher

Garza Law Firm

STRONG EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE MAKES US BETTER LAWYERS

Lawyers are great at many things. When it comes to research, attention to detail, mental recall, and analytical skills, we’re top notch.

Where we don’t necessarily excel is in Emotional Intelligence, also known as EI.

THE EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE STRUGGLE FOR LAWYERS

EI is the ability for each of us to recognize, understand, and manage our own emotions as well as the ability to recognize, understand, manage, and influence the emotions of others. In other words, EI helps us in four primary ways: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship management. Unfortunately, our struggle with fostering good EI within ourselves begins long before we become practicing lawyers. As young people, those who are inclined to venture into the legal field already place a high value on academics, dominance, and leadership.1 Yet, empirical evidence indicates that the legal field has an inherent bias against EI awareness. Studies have shown that the LSAT places a preference on applicants who suffer from mild depression.2 As fully practicing lawyers, we prioritize thinking and suppress feeling to the point that the two become mutually-exclusive in our minds.

Don’t believe me? Let’s look closer. The general public ranks in the 50th percentile in skepticism, sense of urgency, and resilience. On the other hand, lawyers average in the 90th percentile for skepticism, in the low 70s for a sense of urgency, and 20 points lower than the general public when it comes to resiliency.3 This means, as a group, we have difficulty navigating situations that require trust and collaboration, we rush critical relationships which then causes tension. Moreover, we are more sensitive to our own mistakes and failures.

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE BENEFITS IN OUR LIVES AND IN OUR WORK

For attorneys who have a naturally-developed EI or who put in the effort to increase their EI, the payoff can be huge in a variety of ways. Sometimes, the little things mean the most. For example, when we have strong self-awareness, we can recognize our own bad days and how our emotions are impacting our work – and process that without blowing up at support staff for being out of our favorite K-cups, the printer being out of toner, or our spotty internet service.

For those of us focused on earning a good living, there’s good news there, too. Partners who scored higher in EI-related competencies also earned higher in revenue and gross margin. Employees who feel valued remain at a firm longer, lowering recruitment and training costs. Additionally, the capacity to hone in on the strengths of team members yields greater productivity and happier evaluations. But for younger attorneys who don’t necessarily think more money solves more problems, good EI skills still win the day, because they make bosses and teams put more emphasis on manners, personal attention, and more enjoyable business culture.

Perhaps the best news for all of us is that emotionally intelligent lawyers are better communicators, in both the written and spoken word. Not only does this make us more effective at our jobs, it decreases our professional liability and exposure. Poor communication is the number one reason for disciplinary and malpractice claims in the United States.4 Clients respond to warmth and competence, in that order!5 What’s more, attorneys with good EI can anticipate and read emotional reactions in those around them before the conflict starts, and when we communicate optimism, flexibility, and recognition of other human beings around us, we create the resilience we need for long term professional success and personal happiness.

HOW WE CAN BETTER DEVELOP OUR EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

1. Don’t take my word for it. Read about it. There’s the seminal 1996 bestseller from Daniel Goleman called Emotional Intelligence. More recently and specifically, publications like Herding Cats: The Lawyer Personality Revealed by Dr. Larry Richard, Evolutionary Road by Jordan Furlong, and Beyond Smart: Lawyering with Emotional Intelligence by Ronda Muir have all done deeper dives into how lawyers are affected by good EI. 2. Watch muted movies or television shows and see if you can follow the plot by reading emotional cues.6 3. On a regular basis of your choosing, assess what you’re feeling. Doing so with frequency will help you build your emotional vocabulary and expand your awareness. There are also apps for that. 4. Start at the top of your firm and work your way down. Often leadership is less-emotionally intelligent than its charges and chosen for reasons other than leadership qualities (such as seniority or professional connections).7 5. Actively seek feedback and carefully listen to the speaker and their words. Or, find a buddy strong in EI who can provide feedback on your reads of emotional conversations or situations. 6. Learn to monitor your and/or your firm’s “pulse” before and after major changes. Managing to identify, anticipate, and mitigate expected negative reactions before a change occurs creates opportunities for better risk management, decision-making, and succession planning, all of which create competitive advantages.8

1 Polly Botsford, Why lawyers need to be taught more about emotional intelligence, international bar association, available at https://www.ibanet.org/article/bc769d24a76e-447a-aff1-fd92903bbd60. 2 How emotional intelligence makes you a better lawyer, american bar association, Oct. 2017, available at https://www.americanbar.org/news/abanews/publications/ youraba/2017/october-2017/how-successful-lawyers-use-emotional-intelligenceto-their-advan/. 3 Gina Alexandris, Emotional Intelligence and Lawyers—an Old New Frontier, law practice today, Oct. 12, 2018, available at https://www.lawpracticetoday.org/article/ emotional-intelligence-lawyers/. 4 See How emotional intelligence makes you a better lawyer, supra note 1. 5 Ronda Muir, What Good is Emotional Intelligence in Law Management?, american bar association, Oct. 22, 2018, available at https://businesslawtoday.org/2018/10/goodemotional-intelligence-law-management/. 6 See How emotional intelligence makes you a better lawyer, supra note 1. 7 Id. 8 Marissa Vessels, Emotional Intelligence: A Critical Skill for Lawyers, meruscase blog, May 19, 2015, available at https://blog.meruscase.com/emotional-intelligence-acritical-skill-for-lawyers.