Summer 2014 - Issue 11
Dear Friends, As always, Oasis has been very busy and I would like to thank you all for your continued support. We are now in our 20th year and we have been celebrating. Past residents have been coming back to us to work on a creative art project that will express the journeys that they have experienced. One of our support sessions found our women discussing the idea of being like driftwood before arriving at Oasis and now feeling a sense of permanence and grounding. Oasis has long been a refuge and due to our very nature a secret refuge that not many knew about. We now also work out in the community supporting families that are living in their own homes as well as those not safe enough to stay. We have found overwhelming support from those of you in the community and are glad to see that the word of mouth of our great work precedes us. Over the past 20 years Oasis has forged good contacts not only with the community but with services that support those we help. We are constantly looking to improve and continue our work and hope to see another 20 years of helping the Thanet and East Kent community with your fundraising efforts and support. Thank you all once again, Hazel Community Fundraiser The Fundraising team
If you would like up to date information about Oasis fundraising events please join Oasis Domestic Abuse Service on Facebook Follow us on twitter @OasisDAService
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Oasis Domestic Abuse Service 20th Birthday A Survivor’s Story Sandy* stayed in the Oasis refuge, and is sharing her survivors story to celebrate the 20th year of Oasis’s work and to help us raise awareness of domestic abuse. She discusses the manipulation and control she experienced before her time with Oasis, and how her life is now. “My husband used to be very controlling and manipulative. He would say he was going to kill himself and accuse me of having affairs. He would lock me up in the house and take away my phone. He would even accuse me of sleeping with a lifelong female family friend, so I no longer had anyone I was allowed to talk to.
“Without Oasis and the donations of food and clothes I couldn’t have done it.”
So when I left and came to Oasis it was very daunting. I came with just one bag and luckily I had all my paperwork with me. I came on the Friday so it was funny really - I went to go for a walk to have a look around and I couldn’t work out how the security door worked, so I went and asked the other women staying there how to get out, they all rushed to show me and were all very helpful. Oasis helped me to set up my job seekers allowance, but the money didn’t come through for four weeks so without Oasis and the donations of food and clothes I couldn’t have done it. They also put me in contact with a solicitor to help me get a divorce and injunction against my husband. I had tried to leave before - I spent two days at a friend’s house and I went back to him. That is the difference with Oasis, the support you get and the people you meet really help to keep you from going back and let you know what you are doing is right. Continues overleaf...
A Survivor’s story continued... Everyone - my husband and my children - were sending me horrible messages when I first left. He even attempted to put a tracking device on my phone to find me – luckily the team at Oasis spotted it and prevented
“I thought I was being selfish and should put everyone else first because I didn’t deserve to be happy.” it from working so I didn’t have to leave. I didn’t respond to any of the messages, but they were upsetting. Right at the start I thought that’s all I’m worth and maybe I should go back because I didn’t deserve any better. I thought I was being selfish and should put everyone else first because I didn’t deserve to be happy. Everyone at Oasis helped me stay strong though. The staff and the other women in the refuge they help make you believe in yourself, so I didn’t go back. I know I wouldn’t be where I am now without “I know I wouldn’t Oasis, they just know be where I am now the right people to get without Oasis.” in touch with. I know the support is still there if I need help, I know I can call up and someone will be happy to help me and give me advice on what to do. I used to get bored when I was in the refuge so I used to help out with odd jobs and so on - helping out with admin and some fundraising things. I was asked at an event once what I did at Oasis and I just said ‘I live here, I’m a victim of domestic abuse’. I didn’t have to say that but I didn’t see why I shouldn’t. Without Oasis I wouldn’t be in the place I am now. I am so grateful and everyone has made such a difference to me. I want to help Oasis, and if sharing my story helps people understand the great work they do is then good.” *names removed for safety reasons.
If you would like to help Oasis Domestic Abuse Service celebrate its birthday then please make a donation of £20 to help us continue our work in supporting and changing the lives of those living with domestic abuse.
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Your Fundraising Efforts Thanet Squash and Racket Club Thanet Squash and Racket Club of Broadstairs recently raised £250 through their quiz and raffle night. Over 70 people attended this brilliant event, and we would like to thank Peter Davis and all those that joined in with fundraising for Oasis.
Mentmore House Mentmore House raised £243.70 through their coffee mornings. This simple but effective way of fundraising means that Oasis can continue to deliver the holistic services that make the true difference to an individual’s life, both for those in the refuge and the East Kent community.
Inner Wheel Broadstairs The Inner Wheel of Broadstairs kindly donated £400 a fantastic sum that will go a long way to continue our outstanding services, both within our refuge and the Thanet community. Additional funds enable us to deliver supportive services for children, the forgotten victims of domestic abuse, as well as providing additional holistic therapeutic care, alongside the practical care we give.
The Broadstairs Inner Wheel donating £400 to CEO Deborah Cartwright and Trustee Margret McManus
Sewing machine Westgate and Birchington Inner Wheel have donated a sewing machine, materials and spirograph to mark their centenary anniversary. We would like to thank them for this generous donation which has already been put to good use with previous residents in our refuge teaching new residents how to sew, a life-long skill that can make a real difference to confidence and pride. The materials donated will go towards projects such as creating cushion covers and curtains for residents getting ready to move on into their own Hazel Hedges presenting Hazel Eddy with and Westgate & Birchington Inner Wheel donations homes will give them the ability to furnish them with items they have made.
PO Box 174, Margate, Kent, CT9 4GA * www.oasiswomensrefuge.org * charity number 1126198
Can you help Oasis? The essentials Our refuge aims to offer the women and children that come through our doors the necessities they need to feel comfortable and safe. Many of the families come with nothing but the clothes on their backs. From shampoo and shower gel to basic food essentials, we try to offer items that offer a calming reassurance and dignity. The ability to provide a meal for your children and have a wash during what is an extremely stressful time can make a real difference to someone’s life. You can purchase items so that they go straight to Oasis via our Amazon wish-list which can be found by clicking on “Wish List” in the top left corner and searching “Oasis Domestic Abuse Service”. If you can also donate items such as food or toiletries please either call or email hazel.eddy@oasisdaservice.org.
Charity Shop Our charity shop project is well under way as we continue to gather shop fittings through generous donations from local stores. If you or someone you know might be interested in helping with the charity shop is some way please contact with Kathy and email her on kathy.westlake@oasisdaservice.org.
Oasis In The News Love Shouldn’t Hurt Together with help from East Kent College we have created a film with teens exploring the different natures of domestic abuse, and the pressures young people are under when it comes to their personal relationships. Our young adult mentors worked with drama students to understand domestic abuse and the students went on to create the scripts for this short film. This film is currently being edited and when it is ready will be posted on the Oasis website and shared with schools to raise awareness of the different types of abuse and difficulties young people can face in their relationships.
The Freedom Programme Oasis has be selected as a local charity supporting victims of crime by the Kent Police & Crime Commissioner to receive £12,000 of funds that will go towards running group work that is aimed at educating victims about abuse, and abusers, and supporting the victim to move forward into a more positive life. These group sessions allow victims to take back control of their own lives.
Did you know? That last year our Independent Domestic Violence Advisors (IDVAs) supported 1854 people in Kent. (KDAC, year one service report 2014) Kent & Medway IDVA Service
Volunteers are needed not only for the charity shop but for other activities such as organising the distribution and collection of donation pots, fundraising boot fairs and event helpers. If you would like more information on this please email hazel.eddy@oasisdaservice.org.
Year One
Service Report
Because love shouldn’t hurt www.kentcriminaljustice.org
Please pass this newsletter to a friend when you have read it so that they can find out about Oasis too.
Forthcoming Events Postcard auction 2014 This year’s auction held on the Margate Harbour Arm will be in aid of Oasis Domestic Abuse Service and the Margate Caves Trust. Artwork will be on display in the Margate Harbour Arm Gallery from August 30th until the date of the auction, which is September 6th. Artwork is currently being collected from local artists and contributors so that 100 pieces will be auctioned, artwork that is not chosen to go into the auction will be sold throughout the week in the gallery for £10 which will go towards the two charities involved. If you would like to be involved with the postcard auction or would like more details please email hazel.eddy@oasisdaservice.org.
If you have any queries about this donation form please contact us at:
fundraise@oasiswomensrefuge.org or call 01843 290891 domestic abuse service
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2014
Residents exploring the use of colour to express emotion
International Elimination of Violence Against Womens’ Day November 25th marks International Elimination of Violence Against Women day, a day that we usually hold our Annual General Meeting. Here we discuss our progress as a charity and discuss the work we do. All supporters are invited to our AGM, invitations and notice will be given closer to the time. Our AGM will coincide with an artistic event that our refuge support group are currently taking part in with local artists at Resort Studios. The artwork that is being developed and created will be available for viewing at Resort and will also be showcased at our AGM. Cliftonville First (Community First) have kindly donated £1000 of funds towards the exhibition and the work that the artists are doing with some of our previous refuge residents. This project is supported through the Community First Neighbourhood Matched Fund programme administered by CDF for the Office for Civil Society.
Swimathon We are looking for teams that will take part in this year’s swimathon to raise essential funds for Oasis. Organised by the Rotary Club of Margate, the swimathon offers a great challenge for any group as well as raising funds for good causes. If you would like to form a team either of friends or colleagues please email hazel.eddy@oasisdaservice.org.
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Please return the completed form to: Oasis Domestic Abuse Service, PO Box 174, Margate CT9 4GA. By signing the form I confirm that I have read and accepted the terms and conditions below. Please pay the amount detailed above and thereafter the same sum on the same day of each succeeding month until further notice to the account of Oasis Domestic Abuse Service, account number 00021110, sort code 40-52-40.
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Beat The Bog We also have a team of Oasis staff and supporters taking part in Beat The Bog, a 5 mile long course with over 50 obstacles, which will be held on Sunday 26th October. If you would like to enter into the event please visit www.beatthebog.co.uk and set up your justgiving page by searching Oasis Domestic Abuse Service.
Address Postcode Email Contact number GIFT AID Thanks to the Gift Aid scheme you can give an extra 25p per pound. I confi rm I have paid or will pay an amount of Income tax and/or Capital gains Tax for the current tax year(6 April to 5 April) that is at least equal to the amount of tax that all the charities and Community Amateur Sports Clubs that I donate to will reclaim on my gifts for the current tax year. I understand that other taxes such as VAT and council tax do not qualify. I understand the charity will reclaim 25p of tax on every £1 that I have given.
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Did you know? 20 women are housed in our refuge every 6 months.
Registered charity no.1126198 and as a company in England & Wales no. 05810653 www.oasiswomensrefuge.org
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PO Box 174, Margate, Kent, CT9 4GA * www.oasiswomensrefuge.org * charity number 1126198