BRAIN FART
noun
BRAIN FART
A temporary mental lapse or failure to reason correctly.
A brain fart can happen at any moment, on any day of one’s life. The title of this book as “brain fart� refers to the inevitability of human error. In many ways, the process of making art can be
thought of as many consecutive brain farts. Through this process of lapses in reasoning, the brain always returns and pulls all reason and creativity together to produce a final piece.
CHARETTE PROJECT
The purpose of this project is to break existing habits and establish new behaviors. 1. Establish a system for the documentation of process. 2. Create (in miniature) a hybrid design practice 3. Create non-traditional design objects The hybrid object should push between graphic design and contemporary art. Method acting should be used to assume a persona and stay in character while producing a piece of work.
method acting actors embody a character, including the character’s thoughts and emotions in order to accurately capture that persona in performance.
Edith Piaf The Little Sparrow
Edith Piaf was born in 1915 in Belleville, Paris. Her mother was a cafe singer, and her father was a traveling acrobat. Her mother abandoned her as a young child, and her father left her with her grandmother when he went to fight in WWI. Her grandmother ran a brothel in Normandy, where she was looked after by prostitutes. Edith said later in life that she thinks living with prostitutes caused her weakness with men. From the age of three to seven, she was blind because of keratitis, until she was miraculously healed after a pilgrimage to St. Therese of Lisieux. At age 14, she joined her father in his acrobatic performances. After this, she began living with her best friend “Momone”, and they began making money by performing music on the streets. She gave birth to a daughter, Marcelle, at age 17, who soon passed away from neglect and meningitis. She was discovered by Louis Leplee on the street in 1935. Because of her small stature, and nervousness about performing, she was given the nickname “the little sparrow”. She appeared on stage only in black dresses with red lipstick. She began by singing songs of working class life, with its grit and sorrows.
Louis Leplee was murdered, and Edith was accused as an accessory because of her acquaintances in the mob, and then cleaned up her act in order to restore her public image. Edith had a series of intense relationships followed by extreme heartbreak and pain. She had countless lovers, and used love as her creative fuel for her music. The only true love of Edith’s life was the boxer Marcel Cerdan. He died tragically in a plane crash on his way to visit Edith. She married two men after Marcel later in her life, but never loved them the way she loved Marcel. She lived a tortured life, growing up on the streets and in a brothel. She struggled through many passionate, tumultuous relationships with men. She was involved in three serious car crashes after 1951, which led to an alcohol and morphine addiction. She passed away at the age of 47 from liver cancer. Although she had a rough life, on the other hand, she had very positive moments. As a person, she was lively, brave, talented and beautiful. She was confident and sassy, and had a wonderful sense of humor. Her life is a mix of adventure, trauma, passion, love and sorrow. She is regarded as a French icon, and will be remembered forever in a positive light.
Getting Into Persona
Edith Piaf has always captivated my attention. Her music evokes emotions in me that I didn’t know existed. She has a certain magnetic draw that is irresistable and powerful. When I started researching her and her life, I admired her strength and her struggle. The qualities in her that I wanted to embody were her intensity, her passion, and her desire to feel fully without reserve. I also wanted to embody her talent, confidence and sense of humor. I tried to feel what it would be like to grow up in her circumstances and think about how it would influence my behavior with others and what type of work it would lead me to produce. Each day during this project, I put on my black clothes, and put myself in the mindset of a French woman, with a vivacious personality, and pure intense emotion. Armed with all of this valuable information and a good idea of who Edith was, I attempted to get into persona and work. The first time I got into persona, I struggled with truly diving into another person’s brain, another person’s life. But as soon as I let go, I started to feel more confident. I felt like a music diva with a humble upbringing in the streets. I tried to think of myself as Edith right in the middle of a terrible heartbreak. I laid in bed and pretended to feel a great loss of a man I truly loved. I thought about how I would cope with this loss. What would make me feel better? What would give me the ability to move on? A song! An expression of my lost love and of myself.
image on left: Edith Piaf
I started looking at lyrics from Edith’s songs throughout her life, and I thought, “wow! these are intense, raw and beautiful...” I started writing a lot of lyrics, some of them sad, some about love. I thought about what medium besides singing would be appropriate to express myself as Edith. She grew up on the streets and in a brothel, so she had street sensibility and an influence from growing up with prostitutes. Through putting myself in her persona, I imagined an influence from the clothing of the prostitutes and scraps from the streets. I also imagined myself interested in the French aesthetic of the time and the patterns and textures related to it. She also loved to knit, and it was a lifelong hobby, so through all of this speculation and imagination, I found myself wanting to combine mediums Edith is familiar with. I found myself wanting to write more lyrics, and also to try out some sewing. With the mindset of a street sensibility, the influence of a broken heart, and the French aesthetic, I realized I could sew pieces of fabric together that me as Edith found beautiful. I went to the library and picked books about French fabrics to educate myself on the French aesthetic the way Edith would have been, since she lived there her whole life. I went to the fabric store and pushed myself into my Edith persona, and picked four fabrics I could sew together. The fabrics I chose combine the French aesthetic with Edith’s personal tastes.
Imagine you are the soul of Paris herself, tiptoeing around the bar drunk out of your mind, kissing and crying to all of your fans, raw, rapid, an emotional mess BUT you aren’t scared of anything because you are adored.� -Catherine Gonzalez, friend
printed fabrics from French Textile Books: French Textiles from 1760 to Present, and Printed French Fabrics - Toiles de Jouy
Hybrid Object
I did a drawing of how I wanted the fabric to look when I sewed the pieces together. I tried to think of an expressionist, and use my emotions to guide me. I eventually came up with an abstracted flower shape. I met with my friend, Abby Miller, from the fibers department and soaked up all of her sewing knowledge. I settled into the tedious task of sewing each individual piece together by hand. I chose to do this by hand because since I am embodying some-
image on left: Edith Piaf knitting
one from the past, I didn’t want to involve any sort of machine in my approach. I also wanted to do everything by hand so I could create a more expressive and flawed take. I wanted control over every motion, and to feel the tediousness of the process. As Edith, I thought of this as a labor of love. After losing someone, this is how I as Edith would cope, I would put my full self into something else that consumes my time and energy. The sewing machine would have taken away from this emotional process.
Writing
I also continuously wrote thoughts and lyrics throughout this process. I researched Edith’s lyrics and tried to write like her or her songwriters. Her lyrics have this intensity, this enclosing sorrow. I wanted to acheive that level of emotion in mine. I sat and thought how it feels to be heartbroken. To feel dramatically torn from something I still desire. To be in the world continuing my day to day life when I really just want to curl in a ball and never see the light of day again. I researched Edith’s lyrics and found a couple of songs that really spoke to me. Here is a translation of the song “La Vie en Rose”, which is the most well known of her songs. I am struck by the depth and intensity of her feelings in these lyrics. I love her true belief that he is hers for life.
Life in Rosy Hues Eyes that make me lower mine, A laugh that’s lost on his lips That’s the true portrait Of the man I belong to When he takes me in his arms, He whispers softly to me, I see life in rosy hues. He gives me words of love, Everyday words And it does something to me. He’s come into my heart, A share of happiness Which I know the reason for. He is for me and I am for him for life, He has told me, has sworn it for life. And as soon as I glimpse him, I can feel my beating heart. Endless nights of love,
Great joy then takes over Trouble and sorrow disappear, Happy, happy to die for When he takes me in his arms And speaks softly to me, I see life in rosy hues. He gives me words of love, Words of every day, And it does something to me. He’s come into my heart, A share of happiness I know the reason for. It’s you for me, me for him for life, He told me, he has sworn it to me, for life. And as soon as I glimpse him, I can feel my beating heart Another song that spoke to me is called Hymne a L’Amour, which is about the
boxer Marcel, who was the love of Edith’s life that died in a plane crash. The blue sky can collapse in on itself And the earth can cave in Little matters to me if you love me I couldn’t care less about the whole world As long as love will flood my mornings As long as my body will quiver beneath your hands The problems matter so little to me My love, because you love me
If you die and go far from me Little matters to me if you love me Because I will die too We would have eternity for ourselves In the blue of all the immensity In heaven, no more problems My love, do you believe that we love each other? God reunites those who love each other
I would go to the ends of the earth I would dye my hair blonde If you asked me to I would pull down the moon I would steal fortune If you asked me to I would disavow my homeland I would disavow my friends If you asked me to One could well laugh at me I would do anything I would do anything If you asked me to If one day life tears you away from me
progress on sewing
After researching Edith’s lyrics, I compiled all of the ones I had been writing throughout the process
Into the arms of another My heart aches My mind races I see him in my thoughts He is with me everywhere I go
“She preferred melancholy, mournful material, singing about heartache, tragedy, poverty, and the harsh reality of life on the streets; much of it was based to some degree on her real-life experiences” -billboard.com biography
He follows me His smile and love The emptiness is unbearable My heart is now a void Will he return my heart and soul
My writings throughout the project: can the birds carry me away back into your embrace what moves us apart brings us together again I fall under your spell My love is lost The world encroaches around me I drown in sadness I chase my sorrow Until I cant run anymore Sorrow chases me Until I slip away
I am bothered I am stormy The weather wont do Why are the skies bright Yet I feel so dark Why does the sun come up When my world has ended Why does the light follow me When I want to live in the dark My love brings me light He has rescued me
From heartache and uncertainty My love falls into me I fall into love We fall together in bliss Life is best with him He brings light and love Love transcends time The mundane falls away Nothing matters When your hand touches mine The world ceases to exist When I am in your arms I am haunted by a loss Day and night there is no rest My love is a ghost I adore him My eyes follow his charisma His peacefulness while he sleeps I am forever his and him mine my love is a weight I carry a burden I am grateful for
Why does the sun shine When my world is no more Porquoi le soleil brille lorsque mon monde n’est plus
if i were to lose him i would no longer be able to survive I am crushed under the weight of his love overwhelmed with his affection I sink deeper into the ocean of his love an anchor crushes my spirit into his and we become one his whispers resurrect my soul breathing life into me keeping me alive together we must be my dream my love ill surrender my heart risk it all for you My dream my love Live a dream with me Chase clouds by my side Hold my hand under the sky Keep me close My dream must come true
iPhone picture of finished sewn piece with letters written for placement