ARE WE Bathing SUIT READY?

- By Chris Crutcher

ell here it comes! Our first days in the sixties, followed by our first days in the seventies. (I’m talking degrees F, not age!) It’s about time! Can I get an “Amen!”

If there’s bad news connected to this, it’s that it won’t be long before we have to shed the layers that kept us warm and allowed us to appear as if we all have approximately similar body types. Now we’re forced to face that annual dilemma, “What in the world will I wear to the beach?”

As for myself, there was a time back when I swam competitively during which I was “passable” in my Speedo; now it looks like I screwed it on. Not a big deal, I’m seventy-six years old so I can say I forgot where the beach is. Or just say, “What’s a beach?” his here-comes-spring-and-summer beach theme comes to my mind because we as Americans, and probably human beings as a species, are so concerned with body image; with our narrow assessments of physical beauty. If I can claim any expertise in this regard it would have to come from my years working for a couple of decades with troubled kids (and their parents) as a therapist, but I also have a little personal experience: could not make it okay; could not give myself comfort. Funny as I thought I was (and many of my teachers thought I gave myself way too much credit) I found I couldn’t smile or laugh without covering my mouth, or turning away. I was never going to be the cool dude I wasn’t going to be anyway. My mom noticed that the fuse on my temper was growing shorter and shorter, and of course she figured out why...which is why she stopped me on my way through the kitchen one day after school and said, “You know, they can’t laugh at you if you beat them to the punch.” She was telling me to use my superpower before that was even a thing. s an adult who’s had plenty of chances to hear the woes of teenage outsiders, I always council, “Get ahead of them,” or “Find your superpower; everyone has one.” But as you can imagine that might work maybe one time out of six.

But comedy - such as it is - aside, these can be hard times; particularly for pre-adolescent and adolescent human beings. It’s hard to know the cost of the Covid years for our kids; some went through it relatively unscathed and others paid a heavier price. Statistics tell us there’s been an increase in suicidal ideation and in suicides realized, among that age group. Adults with different perspectives will come up with different ideas for causation - isolation, Internet bullying etc. - but only those who refuse to pay attention will deny the truth of numbers.

When I was fourteen, I had my front teeth knocked out doing my own stunt work, as it were, by a girl with a baseball bat. If you’re one of the three or four people who read my ill-advised autobiography, you know the rest of the story, but suffice it to say, I wasn’t looking good. The town I grew up in was too small to have a dentist, so for a week or so I went to school sporting a fat lip and badly broken-off teeth. After that my plastic front teeth were on a bridge that looked as much like real teeth, as a bad toupee looks like hair.

So I wrapped my “falsies” in a tissue, went to my Speech class, and delivered a brilliant talk on “Poithonous Thnakes of the American Thouthwetht. The following week I presented the class with an act of ventriloquism during which I placed the teeth in a hamburger bun and lamented the life of vaudeville hamburger.

It’s up to us to make the lives of broken adolescents easier to navigate. If we all got on board, it might take a generation or two to change the narrative on physical beauty, or prowess, or human worth; and it might never happen, but it sure seems worth a shot. remember student teaching back in the 1969-70 school year over in Monroe, WA. A really popular student, a mainstay on the basketball team, went fishing one evening and in a very unusual accident, capsized his boat and drowned. Monroe was much smaller at the time, and the entire school dropped into a deep funk the following day. Teachers didn’t know how to respond and for the most part, allowed the students to sit through their classes and talk quietly with each other, or read, or even play games. When the school day (mercifully) ended, a freshman boy, intellectually challenged and known to be loud and irritating to all who came within earshot, stomped across the school yard uttering loud invectives. I was standing in his path, talking to this really cool science teacher, who stopped mid-conversation and caught up with the kid.

He said, “Martin, what’s the matter?”

Martin said, “I bet they wouldn’t’a stopped school and made it okay for everybody to feel bad if I would of drowned-ed!”

Maybe the best thing I got out of my student teaching experience happened just then, when the teacher said,

“You know what, Martin? You might be right. We need to do something about that, don’t we? We need to show people your life is just as important as anyone else’s. I won’t forget that I heard you say that. We should sit down soon and figure out how to make that happen.” ccording to the Center for Disease Control, drowning takes the lives of more children aged 1 to 4 than any other human tragedy. The CDC also reports that swimming lessons can reduce the risk of drowning significantly.

Martin just stood there and cried, while the teacher stood with him, rubbing the middle of Martin’s back, which was about all the “touch” Martin could allow.

Maybe we can’t just get rid of our biases about...Whatever our biases are about. But we can by-God behave as if we can.

If you’re considering the life-saving choice of enrolling your babies in swimming lessons, these tips from experts like Josh Oakes, the City of Spokane Recreation Supervisor, might help better your odds of success. Dive into these tips for a little poolside assistance.

Practice in the bathtub

As silly as it sounds, your bathtub is a great place to prepare your toddlers for swimming lessons. “Get them used to getting their faces wet,” Oakes says. “Help them get comfortable in the water before their lessons.”

You can teach them to blow bubbles in the water, but only if they are ready. “Don’t make the water scary by pushing them to far,” Oakes says, “so go at your child’s own pace.” Learning the basics about water in the bathtub will make the transition to lessons much easier.

Read about swimming

Explore toddler books featuring character that are learning, too. There is a brief list in the sidebar, but your local librarian can help you find the best books to prepare your emerging swimmer. Knowing other kids are nervous, too can help your child cope with stress of their own.

Pick the right class

Before you sign up for a swimming class, do you research. “Sign up for the age-appropriate level,” Oakes says. “We have a toddler/parent assist class for babies 6 to 36 months for beginners, and many other choices.” If you’re not sure which level is best, “Just call the aquatics office at (509) 625-6960,” Oakes says. “Our spring activity guide has a flow chart to help you place your child in the right lessons.”

Pack a swim bag

“Come ready for the lesson,” Oakes says. Pack a waterproof bag with essentials including sunscreen, swim diapers, towels, a change of clothing and a post-lesson snack for your little tadpole. Check with your lesson sponsor to see if any other swim aids are required and pack those, too.

Be patient

Whether the day goes well or not, be patient with your little swimmer. If you grow impatient, you’ll add another fear to your toddler’s list—the fear of not pleasing you. Let them learn at their own pace and don’t add to anxieties by being disappointed.

f your family admires art and the fun that goes with it, mark June 2-4, 2023 on your calendar. The Northwest Museum of Art and Culture’s 38th annual ArtFest is sure to be a red-letter day.

Located back on the MAC campus at2316 W. First Avenue, ArtFest 2023 will feature the work of 78 different local creators competing in the juried art show. The diversity of artistic mediums includes ceramics, drawings, furniture, jewelry, textiles, paintings, photography, print making and more. Many will offer affordable works for attendees to purchase and take home.

Up 28 artists from the 2022 event, the vast variety of artwork will be featured at ArtFest, free of charge. But there is more to ArtFest than admiring local artisans. Live music will fill the air, adding to the merriment.

Food trucks and a beer garden will offer food and drinks for art fans of all ages. And kids 12 and under will be able to participate in the Make-it-Art workshops to create fine art of their own to take home, also free of charge.

Pastel and oil paint artist Shelia Evans won first place at the 2022 ArtFest for the first time after dozens of attempts. The graduate of Gonzaga University (1988, BA in Fine Arts) will be going for a second win in 2023.

The MAC campus has a lush, park-like atmosphere ideal for a popular public event like ArtFest. So join your friends on June 2, 3 and 4th—10:00 am to 7:00 pm on Friday and Saturday, 10:00 am to 5:00 pm on Sunday. On-street parking will be free and parking for the disabled is available at the MAC parking garage on Hemlock & Riverside.

Spokane Transit bus routes 20/33, 60 and 61 can drop riders off within a few short blocks of the MAC and bike racks are available near the main ArtFest entrance.

For more information, visit the MAC’s ArtFest website at www.artfestspokane.com.

BY: KELLY MILNER HALLS