Transport Trouble

By Emily Albers

I want to preface by saying that I fully support the tube strikes, and I only have myself to blame for ending up in the situation I did. Mistakes were made. Lessons were learned.

Wednesday night was our class dinner at Wagamama, but none of the tube lines were running that day due to a strike and trying to get anywhere was extremely difficult. For whatever reason, I’d convinced myself we were meeting at the Wagamama in Soho, so I decided to spend the day there to avoid any transport delays. I was right on time when five o’clock rolled around, but I didn’t see any familiar faces as I looked around the restaurant. An employee asked if he could help me, and I told him I was supposed to be meeting a large group of people there, under the name Klayder. He typed something into a mini iPad and told me that there weren’t any big groups booked under that name.

My brain finally returned from vacation long enough to give me the good sense to check our GroupMe. If I’d thought to do that earlier, I would’ve seen that it was the Wagamama in Covent Garden, not Soho. I berated myself for not thinking ahead - or thinking ahead but doing it wrong - knowing that given the tube strikes, I probably wouldn’t get there until six. But thankfully, Mary had made it optional, so I grabbed a sandwich from the Marks and Spencer across the street and set my sights on getting to the bar I had made reservations for at seven. I’d made the reservation a few weeks prior thinking I was smart to book one in Whitechapel because I didn’t need the tube to get there. I could take the bus. But from what I’d encountered trying to get a bus to Soho that morning, it wasn’t going to be the easy twenty-five minute trip I’d planned for. Again, thinking ahead, but doing it wrong. Still, I had time and I thought I could manage it. I was so optimistic, so naive, and so terribly wrong. I waited at the closest stop and tried several times to get on a bus, but they were practically spilling over with people and the drivers would only allow one or two people on. Sometimes the doors wouldn’t open at all, and people would bang on the windows and shout at the driver to let them in. I felt like I was in a zombie apocalypse film. By this point it was ten past six and I knew that walking was my fastest option, but it still would’ve taken an hour. Plus, I’d spent the last five days walking all over London and my feet hurt so badly I could barely stand, let alone walk that far. I thought about trying my luck with hailing a taxi, but there were so many cars on the road that traffic was basically at a standstill. It would’ve taken hours just to get out of Soho, let alone make it to Whitechapel. But the buses had their own lanes, so they were able to bypass the worst of the traffic. They were my only hope. I had to keep trying.

There were two bus stops on Regent Street that had buses going to Whitechapel and luckily they were only a few yards from each other. I stood at the stop with the least amount of people to increase my chances of getting on, then I looked down Regent Street until I saw one coming. If it was one of the buses that stopped at my station, I’d try to squeeze through to the front of the crowd only to have the doors close in my face. If the bus stopped at the other station, I’d do a painful sprint down to that one. What transpired over the next forty-five minutes was nothing short of my very own live-action version of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode “Rock Bottom”. For those unfamiliar, SpongeBob gets on the wrong bus and ends up in a creepy town at the bottom of a trench. His only hope of getting back home is to catch a bus, but this proves exceedingly difficult as the bus only arrives when he’s not looking or leaves the stop, and it only stops for a split second.

It was almost seven and not only was it too late to make my reservation, but I was becoming increasingly concerned that I wouldn’t even be able to get back to our hotel. It was dark, cold, and the steady drizzle of the day had turned to a downpour. My phone had died, my backup charger had died, and the laptop I used to charge the charger had died. I was ready to just give up and sleep in the bedding section of Marks and Spencer. But then I witnessed something miraculous. A bus stopped in front of me and one by one, every single person got off. No one else got on. It sat there idling, empty save for the driver. I knew it was too good to be true; the bus simply terminated there. However, a thought occurred to me and with it came a surge of newfound hope. Other buses would need to use that stop. It had to move, to go somewhere. And anywhere was better than there. So, with Pink Panther music playing in my head, I snuck onto the bus through the back. A few seconds later, it started to move. I gave a silent cheer and a sigh of relief - I was getting out of there! But my joy was short lived as we’d only gone a few blocks before the bus pulled to the curb and the lights shut off. The driver turned around and looked at me, confused.

“What are you doing here?” He asked.

“Oh, I thought this was going to Holborn.” I lied.

He shook his head. “No, no, you have to get off.”

So I did, utterly defeated. But as I looked around, I noticed that the area he’d stopped in wasn’t quite as busy. I wandered around for a bit before I found a bus stop and by then, I’d made up my mind that I was going to get on the next bus; it didn’t matter how full it was or where it was going.

Of course, that was easier said than done. The first bus didn’t arrive until eight and it had obviously just come from Regent Street as there were so many people on it, top and bottom, that it looked like it was about to tip over. There was no chance of getting on that one. Two more buses came. Same thing.

It was so late by the time the third bus arrived that the crowds had thinned out a bit. Not a lot, but just enough for me to squeeze on. It was still a packed bus and everyone’s faces were shoved into everyone’s backs but I didn’t care; I was relieved beyond measure. I’d accomplished the hardest step, now I had to figure out where we were going and more importantly, how to get back. I looked at the list of stops and saw that I was in luck; one of them was Euston Station which was a big transport hub, especially for buses. There had to be one there that would take me back to a hot shower and a cozy bed. The bus made several stops along the way and at every station, I looked out the window at the people who hadn’t been as lucky as me. They all looked exhausted; some stared at the ground, forlorn, while others glared at us with envy.

I was so thankful that I could finally rest my aching feet that I hardly noticed it took 30 minutes to drive two miles to Euston. I stepped off and my heart leapt at the sight of bus stops all around me, each with only a handful of people. I checked the schedule, found one that would stop on Gloucester Road, and had no trouble getting on when it arrived. It was a quarter past ten when the bus finally reached my station. I practically had to drag my body back to the hotel and as soon as I got to my room, I collapsed on the bed and fell asleep. The next morning the tubes were up and running by nine. They warned that there would be delays, but that seemed minor compared to what I’d been through the day before. I’d never been more thankful to be hurtling through those tunnels and I hope it’s sooner rather than later when the tube workers are given the pay rise they deserve - for everyone’s sake!

Jane Horrocks’ Bio

By Emily Albers

Born in Rawtenstall, Lancashire in 1964, Jane discovered she had a penchant for performing at a young age and loved to mimic famous singers like Julie Andrews and Barbra Streisand. At age eighteen, she was accepted to RADA (Royal Academy of Dramatic Arts) and moved to London. Upon graduating, she spent two years at the RSC (Royal Shakespeare Company) before breaking out into film and television. Her early credits include The Dressmaker (1988), The Witches (1990), the cult classic Life is Sweet (1990), and a guest appearance on the TV series Red Dwarf (1992).

In 1992, Jane landed the role of Bubble in Jennifer Saunders’ universally beloved Britcom, Absolutely Fabulous. A year later, she starred as the titular character in Jim Cartwright’s hit West End play The Rise and Fall of Little Voice, which was written specifically for her to showcase her incredible talent for mimicry. In 1998, the play was made into a film (Little Voice) and received massive critical acclaim. By the early 2000’s, Jane had established herself as a tour-de-force and her momentum never slowed. She continued to charm audiences with performances in films such as the claymation classic Chicken Run (2000), the biopic Gracie! (2009), and the musical Sunshine on Leith (2013), as well as television series such as The Amazing Mrs. Pritchard (2006), Trollied (2011-2015), and Inside No 9. (2015). Currently, you can see her as Wendy in Bloods on Sky Comedy. Later this year, you can hear her reprise her role of Babs in the Chicken Run sequel and see her as the strawberry blonde Victoria Dalton in COBRA. Check out @littleshopofhorrocks on Instagram for more!

Ethan is a senior at KU, majoring in Biochemistry and Anthropology from Overland Park, Kansas. He serves as the Executive Director for the Center for Community Outreach and loves being involved at KU and in Lawrence. He also enjoys playing video games, volleyball, and hanging out with his friends. He enjoyed non-British cuisine in London and visited Westminster Abbey and St Paul’s Cathedral.

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