May 2017 The La Trobe Juris Doctor includes: – an internationally relevant and contemporary perspective on the law – access to the Secretariat of Australian Lawyers for Human Rights (ALHR)
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6
Letter From the Editors
May 2017
7 LTSU President Welcome 8
From Your Vice-Chancellor’s Desk
10 Welfare Report 12
Aladdin on Broadway: Review
14 Freedom 15 Stigmas 16 An Alcoholcics Daughter 17 Seagull 18 Assumptions
CONTENTS
20 Chronically Fed-Up 22
The Morning I met Dave Makoshark
24
A University Student’s Guide to Self-Care
26 Sweet Eats 29 The Top 8 30 The Homeless Problem 31 The Independent SHE 32
Mastering the Art of Parenthood
34 Horror and Hope 36
The Case for Universal Basic Income
39 National Union of Students 40 Aurora Internship 41
Two Birds One Scone
42 Board Games 43 Cosmosis 44 Student Wellbeing 46
Humans of La Trobe
48 Cold Coffee 50 Two Years Lonley 52 Songs of Prosperine 54 Untitled 55
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Chior, A Natural De-Stressor
56 Train
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May 2017
Getting involved with clubs and societies on campus is undoubtedly beneficial. I have made some of my best friends through different clubs on campus who have saved me from failing my degree/overloading with stress many times.
LETTER FROM THE EDITORS It’s ok not to be ok. One thing most of us have in common at university is the struggle to adjust to life away from home, high school and friends.
There are even those among us who have it tougher and need help. Alcohol and drug abuse.
Renting.
Anxiety.
Assignments.
Mental illness.
Working.
Lack of family support.
Going out.
Physical impairments.
Studying.
Etc...
Etc...
What can we do about it? Create this collective, within a magazine and give the voices that have historically been neglected a platform to speak their truth, their trials and tribulations.
It’s quite odd, in our opinion, how in high school no one trains you to ‘survive’ out in the real world. There’s no high school subject or manual that warns and you about how lonely, tough, frustrating and draining adult life can be.
I believe university is about exploring and challenging ourselves and ideas. That’s why I joined clubs that I usually wouldn’t have. This gave me the opportunity to learn what I did and what I didn’t like.
Stress.
This is your welfare issue. Z&K
PRESIDENT’S WELCOME Hello and Welcome to the Welfare edition of Rabelais! This month has been absolutely hectic! We’re in full swing with classes, assignments and, of course, social activities. It’s around this time of the semester I usually decide to get involved with clubs because I realise I can manage my study load and some extra-curricular activities
Aside from joining clubs, I also constantly go to the Student Union for help if I’m in need. I understand this is a bit of a shameless plug, but you’ll thank me - trust. You’ll thank me because not a lot of students realise the advocacy, legal and financial services we have available for those in need. The welfare department has done a brilliant job in setting up free food twice a week, emergency housing for those in need and financial counselling for people who struggle with the $$$. As for our education team, they’ve set up free food once a week and advocacy services for those who get an academic misconduct, or misdemeanour hearing. This stuff right here can often be the difference between a student living below the poverty line and succeeding at Uni. The message is clear: get involved and get help if you need it. After-all that’s what the LTSU is here for. Cheers,
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Jake
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May 2017
FROM YOUR VICECHANCELLOR’S DESK JOHN DEWAR
What can La Trobe University do to support/ address students who are studying while dealing with being homeless? What support networks exist and have they been able to work? It’s sad to think that any of our students are dealing with homelessness, but I understand that homelessness affects many people in our community, and I know there are some students who are struggling financially and are without stable housing. Homelessness can result from many issues including low income, lack of affordable housing, family and relationship breakdown, poor physical and mental health, drug use and domestic violence, and we have services to support students when they need help. There are times when some students are unable to utilise their normal support networks, or do not have the resources to obtain housing. The University provides support services including emergency financial aid, and the La Trobe University Student Union can help with emergency housing. Our Equity & Diversity team can also help you manage your study plans and commitments if a period of homelessness impacts your academic progress. If you or someone you know needs support because of homelessness there are also a range of community support services available, including: Youth Central- visit www.youthcentral.vic.gov.au or call 1800 825 955 (free call, 24 hours) for information on homlessness, renting and cheap accomodation Safe Steps- Famil Violence Response Centre for women and children experiencing family violence. Call (03) 93222 3555 or toll free 1800 015 188
attend university, and many times I have seen these students lead the way for the rest of their family – and in some cases their local community – by showing what can be achieved through university study. It’s one of the ways that we are able to make a real difference to the lives of individuals and communities. Of course education is more than just being able to find a job, and the skills learnt at university will serve you throughout your life, and impact positively in other ways. An education gives you the ability to think critically and analyse information, a skill that can help you in many aspects of life, from negotiating relationships to sorting through the masses of information that we are faced with these days. In terms of driving human welfare and progress, universities play a crucial role in building knowledge. We can look back and see that our understanding of the world develops over time, as each successive generation builds our collective knowledge of the world. As well as teaching the next generation, universities are custodians of historical knowledge, and in these two capacities we bring together the ingredients for critical reflection on the past and advancement of theories and ideas to guide the future. Is La Trobe working towards becoming a more accessible university for non-abled body students and staff? What can students, and indeed staff do better help their disabled peers around university?
In your opinion, how does higher education positively drive human welfare and progress?
We have just begun the process of developing a Disability Action Plan for the University. This will cover a range of areas including the physical built environment and academic and support services, as well as the particular needs of individual staff, students and visitors to our campuses. As part of this process we will work with a range of groups including staff representatives, student representatives and support services.
Education is transformative, and by that I mean it can give people the ability to change their lives in ways that would not be possible without the knowledge and skills that come through learning. La Trobe has many students who are the first in their family to
In undertaking this important work, we are guided by the principles of the Disability Discrimination Act (DDA), and we support its aims of eliminating discrimination against people with a disability, supporting their rights, and promoting recognition
Centrelink and the Departmnet of Human Services can also provide rent and bond assistance as well as loans which are paid off slowly over a year. See www.humanservices.gov.au
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and acceptance of their rights in the wider community. We support people with a disability to fully engage in all aspects of University life, from participating in sporting clubs and having full use of our buildings to engaging with the curriculum. Often students are unaware of the services that are available to help them in their studies. Students with a disability can talk to a Disability Advisor who can assist them. As well as giving you advice on managing your studies, Disability Advisors can help with making adjustments to your assessment and academic requirements if needed. Tell us more about the Olga Tennison Research Centre and how it will change life for people with autism. OTARC is Australia’s leading research centre dedicated to autism spectrum disorders, and is committed to creating lifelong positive outcomes for people with autism – from early childhood through to adulthood. It provides a vehicle for research activities, evidence-based intervention programs, and training opportunities and collaboration between community services and research centres and universities involved in autism research, both in Australia and overseas. Our researchers in OTARC work on many different projects, but it’s worth mentioning the phenomenally successful app that they developed last year to help with the early detection of autism, called ASDetect, which has enabled hundreds of families to begin early intervention with children at risk of developing autism. This app is the first of its kind and received worldwide attention when it was released last year, including winning a Google Impact Challenge. The
app is being translated into Chinese and Spanish, further spreading its impact and helping people across the world manage the impact of autism. OTARC typifies the way that research can be applied to real-world problems. OTARC researchers are helping people with autism and their families by developing evidence-based strategies to support people with autism to be active members of our community, and at the same time they are advancing knowledge about the nature and causes of autism spectrum disorders. Any tips for getting through stressful exam and assignment seasons? Everyone deals with stress differently, but planning ahead and being prepared for exams and assignments is essential to success. It’s also important to reach out for help when you need it. Our new Learning Futures Study Support website provides a range of resources to help students develop the academic skills they need to do their best, including online self-help resources for those who can’t get to campus or who prefer to study at home. Our Peer Learning Advisers (PLAs) can also help with assignments and learning skills, and you can meet with one of our PLAs without making an appointment. Our PLA teams are located in the library on each campus. Visit the PLA website to see the timetable at your campus.
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HAVE YOU PAID FOR AN
WELFARE REPORT Hey La Trobians, our names are Shae Williams & Ha Le. We are your 2017 Welfare Officers at the LTSU.
Each week we run events like the free BBQ and free breakfast on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. It has been our pleasure to represent your welfare and wellbeing thus far and we look forward to doing heaps more throughout the year. So far we have worked tirelessly to improve our services by making them more efficient and heaps bigger. This year we have been seeing massive turnouts to all of our events which has been so amazing to see. One of our aims going into this year was to help give students a reason to stay at Uni outside of their contact hours, and it has been so amazing to see students interacting and meeting new people at our events. We have also worked with the National Union of Students on their #FixCentrelinkNow Campaign where we received hundreds of signatures from you all, and we also got the most signatures in the country. More recently, we had the NUS Welfare Officer, Jill Molloy, visit us to come see or Penalty Rates Campaign, where we had conversations with heaps of students. It was amazing to hear all the stories of how the cuts to penalty rates affected students. So thank you. We have big things like Stress Less Week being planned, which is a week dedicated to de-stressing students before the exam period and highlighting the significant stresses and mental health issues students go through while studying at La Trobe. So get keen because there should be super cute puppies and heaps of other cool stuff.
ASSIGNMENT ONLINE? If you submit it, that’s called Contract Cheating AND THE PENALTIES ARE SEVERE
Being caught for cheating can lead to: - Immediate expulsion from Uni - Cheating recorded on your transcript - Your student visa being cancelled
IT’S NOT WORTH IT!
Regards, Shae Williams & Ha Le
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FIND HELP NOW: www.latrobe.edu.au/students/support/achieve www.latrobesu.org.au/advocacy
STUDENT LA TROBE
UNION
UNIVERSITY
latrobesu.org.au
May 2017
DISNEY’S ALADDIN
THE MUSICAL IS A VISUAL SPECTACLE NOT TO BE MISSED BY MEG KENNEDY
As the kids these days say it, I’m Disney “trash” [1]. Aside from the classics, I have seen the new Beauty and the Beast film five times, I know all the words to the songs from Tangled and I absolutely love the Star Wars and Marvel films, all of which are Disney property. So yes, I would be lying if I didn’t come into the Broadway musical production of Aladdin with a tiny bit of bias – although this didn’t always help in my favour. When I was waiting eagerly in line, I was starting to question whether my love for such a timeless film would be changed - as I’m sure many of you would be wondering the same. “What if the musical ruins my childhood imagination? Will my love for the film be ruined? Oh, god forbid, what happens if the Genie doesn’t live up to the late, great Robin Williams’ legacy?” were some of the thoughts that rushed through my mind as I waited for the show to start.
Another one of these was “Holy s***” Waleed Aly and his family are sitting right next to me!” But that’s a story for another time. After careful viewing and much enjoyment, I can easily say Aladdin the Musical is full the pure Disney magic you lived for as a child. Although the classic songs return and the story is almost a carbon-copy of the original 1992 film, additional plot and character details, as well as new characters all together, give the story a breath of fresh air.
Firstly, the costumes are beautiful. Bejewelled to the max; the way in which the diamonds shimmered from the reflection of the stage lights was almost (yes, I’m going to say it) magical. The iconic colours and outfits of the original are used, from Aladdin’s chest baring get-up to Princess Jasmine’s iconic turquoise crop top and pants. The cartoon is rather plain with its characters’ clothing, so to see not only the costumes come to life, but tailored for the stage with an incredibly intricate design was amazing to watch. Secondly, and I’m sure this is the part you’re waiting for, Michael James Scott’s performance as the Genie was easily one of the most incredible theatre performances I’ve ever seen. Although as pop culture-aware and fourth wall breaking as Williams’ Genie, Scott knew how to capture the audience with such ease.
His sassy, hilarious and high-energy performance created an all new and just as enchanting (another magic pun, I’m sorry!) interpretation. The classic “Friend Like Me” number is redone hilariously and with the aid of incredible music, set and lighting, received the only standing ovation in the middle of a show I’ve witnessed. As a whole, the musical a stage show extravaganza, with the added mixture of Disney childhood nostalgia. It’s fun, thrilling and exciting, and left my mouth wide open from pure imagination - just like Disney did for my eight-year-old self. Disney’s Aladdin is currently performing at Her Majesty Theatre until October. You have enough time to bring in that money on a student budget, because it will definitely be worth it! [1] If you aren’t aware of popular youth slang, according to the Urban Dictionary, “trash” is “when your entire reason of existing is a certain thing, you are ____ trash. More obsessed than a fan, but not a stan.” I know. 2017 everyone.
This allowed me, as much of a Disney fanatic I am, to view the show with new eyes. When I reflect on the production, two things completely step out in my mind – the incredible costume design, and Michael James Scott’s new rendition of the iconic Genie.
Photo by Deen Van Meer
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May 2017
STIGMAS BY SEV YAHYA
So many people think that the difficult part of having a mental illness or a chronic disease is dealing with it daily. They’re not wrong, that is quite difficult, but I wouldn’t say it’s the most difficult. That is reserved for the stereotypes and stigmas associated with the titles of the illness. “You have diabetes? Is it because you’re...you know... fat?” “You have depression? Why? Your life is great, you should be thankful. I mean look at the kids in Africa, compared to them you have no reason to be sad.” “Why are you anxious? Just calm down. You have no reason to be scared.” These are the statements and questions I get when I tell people about my illnesses. I won’t say they’re wrong, they’re just redundant to the situation, which ends up frustrating me so much. I’m sure that I’m not the only one who gets these comments daily and for this reason I want to take the time to explain a bit about what it is that I, and people like me, deal with and what that entitles. After all, clarity leads to harmony. I am someone who has dealt with diabetes since the age of nine. Let me clear a few things up here: 1.No, I did NOT get diabetes because I was/am “fat” and 2.Yes, there is more than one type of diabetes and it can be caused by things other than obesity. I developed diabetes at a young age because it was coded in my genetics. The doctors said it was bound to happen at some point in my life. I was just unfortunate enough to live through a “traumatic” event so early on and have it develop earlier than it was predicted to. This was the worst news I have ever received, even to this day, but I’ve learned to adapt and turn it into a positive. To me, diabetes is about maintaining a healthy lifestyle. I can’t say I do that
successfully, but I can say that if it wasn’t for this disease I would be worse off. So, I am grateful for that every day. I am grateful that I am forced to have the motivation to live a lifestyle as healthy as I can. I was diagnosed with severe case of chronic depression and anxiety. Once again, both are genetic and brought on by the same “traumatic” event early in my life. Just to clarify, I didn’t go through anything life changing per say. As a child, I moved countries with my family with the intent to live there from then on. However, plans changed after I got ill and we returned to Australia. That small amount of time that I did spend there was enough to bring up these problems. During that time, I started isolating myself from the world. I was too afraid to do anything or even try. I became a ‘lone wolf.’ I didn’t want to make friends or associate with others. I just wanted to do what I had to and move on with my life. To be frank, I didn’t want to live anymore. But I fought back every day, as I still do. This is a constant battle I face in my life. It will never go away or get better. It is not just a matter of being “sad” or “scared” or to “pluck up some courage and face your fears” or even to “stop being a pussy.” No. This is a matter of a chemical imbalance in my body that messes with my mentality and rationality. No amount of “encouragement” will fix that. However, support is appreciated as is patience. My point here is, the stigma behind these mental illnesses doesn’t quite reflect the struggle and willpower it takes to actually improve oneself. To grow beyond these illnesses. For that reason, I will conclude with this; Never underestimate yourself. The things you go through, the struggles you face are yours and yours alone. Do not let the stigmas and stereotypes behind these illnesses define you. You are a beautiful individual who is much more than just your illness. Your illness is PART of you but not ALL of you. Embrace that and show everyone else how great you are.
FREEDOM BY HUSNA ACISU Edition Three/ Page 14
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AN ALCOHOLICS DAUGHTER BY AISHWARYA
An alcoholic’s daughter? Yup, that is me! I don’t know why you tear me up inside I don’t know why you seem to not understand
I was lost that day, lost forever The glass of dreams that I had engrossed myself in had been shattered My world slipped away right under my feet Too quick like sand through my fingers
I don’t know when you became one of them Nor do I know how to make you come out of the den
But why me, why me and not someone else? It could be her, it could be him, but no, you chose it to be me Your lonely target I was, intentional it may not have been
How could you foul-mouth me? Is it proof of pure love? I wish I knew, I could have answered the breaking barrier of innocence Were you not supposed to be the man I ran to when in need? Then how could you forget that you were my inner strength
Unintentionally let it be, but I was the target you had thought it should be As a child I remember spending long hours trying to imagine Was it my mistake that you be my father? Behind bars should I be for being the daughter of a man like you? Guilt should overshadow me, or sin bewilder my head for wanting you to live Life if it took, I would fight death itself to have you by my side
The daughter of an alcoholic, yes that is me Whose fault is it that I am at the centre of My mistake? I don’t know, rectify it I would if I could But nothing was my choice but pure chance
Why this much love father, why this much Too much I see it is, hurting to hold on I wish I could let go and fly to the skies But I am bound by a restriction now called affection
Trying to fool myself that it was all a play rehearsal It was my mother and sister that you raised your hand at You should have known better, after all I was only a little one
Running away I would have if I could But mum’s pain was too much that it overshadowed mine I guess Who was she going through all this for? After all I was one reason holding her back Why this much pain, stop hurting us, we don’t want to live in this constant vein
Come out of it now, now it must be Any later, then there is no need for turning back For once when you will turn if not now, nothing will remain, even the trail Let it go, it is a demon, eating not only you but us from within
The time I saw you fall head over heels to the ground That was the day that my inner conscience was shattered Broken into too many bits and pieces it was too hard to find Letting go was easier than searching low and high!
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Give us some peace, at least now give it to us Learn that without you there is no happiness for us Understand your importance, we are tired of explaining Come back and be the rise of the sun, bringing with you the rays of joy
SEAGULL BY PALLAVI SINGHAL Edition Three/ Page 17
May 2017
More often than not, people make assumptions about people with disability. As a carer of a child with disability, I notice these assumptions and the impact it has on the treatment of the person. I’d like to shed some light on these misconceptions and explain why we should avoid this train of thought. Assumption 1: That person with disability is unhappy. We need to understand that people with disabilities are just average human beings. We all go through hardships and sometimes they might affect us mentally and emotionally and sometimes they may not. As a matter of fact, research has revealed that people with disabilities consistently report a good quality of life.
ASSUMPTIONS BY ASEEL SAMMAK
Making this incorrect assumption changes the tone and the attitude of the conversation; the topics often focus on the health of the individual and their general wellbeing and don’t really venture beyond that.
Assumption 3: people with disability can only converse about their health or disability. People with disabilities are just like everyone else, they have interests; they can have intellectual and interesting conversations. In fact, one of the most politically aware students that I know is a man in a wheelchair. Assuming that all they care about is their health or condition is unfair on the individual and as a matter of fact offensive. We need to learn to look beyond the disability to find out more about the individual in front of us, what they care about and what our commonalities are.
Assumption 4: They lead a boring life. Again, we need to stop looking at the disability itself and get to know the individual in front of us. For all you know this person could have climbed Mount Everest, or written a book, maybe they are into the same movies as you or the same books.
Assumption 5: The person with disability are a burden on their family. As a carer of a child with disability myself, this particular assumption hits home. It really grinds me when people ask me how I manage, or if I am tired of caring for my brother. Living life with a disability does require a strong network, family friends who will support and push you forward. In no way does this mean that the person is a burden, many times in fact the person teaches all those around them many lessons of life, they bring joy, love and a fresh perspective into life.
hese five assumptions are only a few of the many assumptions made about people with disability. In refuting these assumptions, I do not intend to generalize or categorize all people with disabilities within one bubble. We are all individual humans and we all lead different lives.
Assumption 2:People with disabilities are incapable of doing anything independently. It is common that the general expectation is that a person with a disability is incapable of doing anything on their own. This is inclusive of things like working, driving, socializing, studying and even sometimes getting married or having a relationship. There are many programs around, that focus on people with disabilities to prepare them to be able to live their day to day lives independently. In fact there is a “deaf café” right here in Melbourne called Tradeblock café!
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May 2017
CHRONICALLY FED-UP Dear Student Body,
BY JESSIEANNE GARTLAN
My friends think I don’t want to see them anymore. My parents think I’ve disowned them. And if I fail this last semester, it is definitely not my fault. I swear! Okay, so I may have clocked enough hours on Netflix to make it send me multiple “Are you still alive?” prompts, but it’s still not my fault. It is the fault, however, of a little condition known as chronic fatigue syndrome. If you haven’t heard of it I wouldn’t be surprised in the least. Most of my doctors barely know what it is. It’s a very misunderstood condition, which makes explaining why it’s not my fault that I forgot to take off my slippers and put on my work shoes before leaving the house even more difficult. Here’s how it works - it’s kind of like there are clouds in your mind and small weights attached to your limbs. Every thought and every movement takes an excessive amount of effort, and each effort drains the little energy you do have. The specialist I saw believed my brain was akin to an iPhone 5 battery. When most people sleep, their battery packs recharge all the way to the top. You wake up, you have 100 percent battery and it slowly declines throughout the day, right? Not so for those of us enjoying the whimsically random symptoms of chronic fatigue syndrome. Sore muscles, despite the marked lack of exercise? Yep, chronic fatigue. Needing to wear sunglasses for night driving in order to avoid the bright lights? Yep, chronic fatigue. Forgetting your phone number half way through giving it out in a voicemail? Okay, that one happens to everyone, but I’d like to think that it only happens on an extremely occasional basis for most people. Not so with chronic fatigue. I’ve even constructed obsessive rituals for myself to ensure I don’t do things like leave the gas on, burn my house down and roast my tiny cat alive while I wander about the streets in search of chocolate, blissfully unaware of the inferno blazing back home.¬¬ ¬¬¬¬ We are never fully ‘charged’. We are never fully prepared for, well, anything. To try and make up for it, we plan our weeks with the military precision of a US drone assault. There are lists to remind us to check our lists. Phone alarms, Google alerts and emails to yourself that read, “Dear self, do not forget to wash your underwear today. Also, eat something other than cheese”. Side note - this was the year in which I discovered aged cheddar. Maybe there is a God. Life becomes a cycle of re-washing out your only pair of sweatpants, because you’re too tired to give a rat’s
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arse about your appearance. Watching the entirety of “Scrubs” for the eighth time, preferably with cheesecoated chocolate in your face. Life becomes very confusing, especially when trying to navigate the cluttered halls of academia.
ONLY
25
$
Turning up to any class before 12pm is a mission. Actually contributing to class - like, with words and stuff - is even more of an effort. Frankly, what comes out of my mouth before 12pm will only add to the impression that I’m not all there - because I’m not.
for STUDENTS $40 for nonstudents
Let’s not even talk about work. I think I should be given an award just for making it in and not falling asleep on shift. That’s what the staff awards should be about – making it in when you nearly fell asleep on the drive over. I’ll tell you one thing though. Chronic fatigue cures any worries you may have about what your friends think of you. At the risk of sounding bitter (which I am), when you have an illness that isn’t understood in the least, where half the GPs you come across will doubt its legitimacy, you can bet that your friends will doubt it even more. There is an equation that comes into play here. Take one friend losing it at you because you’ve bailed on a night out in a noisy pub, surrounded by noisy people, because you just can’t deal with that much stimuli. Add one face-to-face confrontation, and what you get is a bizarre, one-sided argument. Your friend yells at you, but in all your emotional exhaustion, you can’t really give back. You kind of come across as a bit of a psychopath. You just can’t muster the energy to engage with the emotional state of your friend, who now takes it as a further sign that you don’t care. The truth is, you are trying to muster up some kind of emotional response but there’s just nothing. It is as depressing as it sounds. At the end of the day, there doesn’t seem to be much for chronic fatigue sufferers to do but manage it and learn to trust themselves. To trust that, even when everyone is holding expectations for them, even when everyone their age is able to do two or three times as much as they are. To know they are doing the best that they can, and to trust that they know what their bodies need. It’s a lesson we all need to learn in the end, but life has moved it up in the schedule for those of us blessed with such debilitating illnesses. Yours Truly, Chronically Fed-Up
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It was a Monday morning, Labor Day to be specific. I woke up at about 7:15 and remembered we were out of coffee. Luckily, there was a café nearby that sold the coffee I really like, so I put my shoes on and away I went. Due to it being a public holiday the café wasn’t open yet, so I went for a bit of an extended walk, and ducked into Woolies to buy some stuff for brekkie. The café still wasn’t open when I’d finished shopping, so I found a place to sit outside the café and patiently scrolled through my social media.
THE MORNING I MET DAVE MAKOSHARK BY TYLER TREVASKIS
It was a quiet morning, something I wasn’t used to, considering there were three cafes and a train station; all bunched together on this little side street in Flemington. When it’s this quiet, you tend to notice when someone walks near you. When I saw Dave across the street walking towards me, I immediately prepared myself. He was carrying a tray with two coffees in one hand and a plastic bag filled with Lipton iced teas in the other. Was he going to ask for money, or for a lighter? Was he just after a chat? I had no idea. When he asked me, “You here for the interview mate?” I knew I was probably in for a stitch up. “Ahh … I don’t think so?” I anxiously replied, not knowing what was in store for me. “Yeah, the interview … you know … the job interview? For my company, Cowbell Corporations. We go around to music festivals, weddings, birthdays, whatever, and we ring cowbells.” “Oh” I said. “No? That sounds good but I’m not sure that’s me mate.” “Mate, Luke Beveridge told me you’re the guy and that I’d find you here.” Dave said confidently.
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May 2017
I’ve got everything I need!” I say, going with the joke.
Just chuck me a follow or whatever, it’s a public profile so...”
“No no no …” said Dave. “Like what equipment are you gonna bring? I’m talking a mop, a bucket …”
Then Dave asks me how old I am.
“Rubber gloves?” I say.
“Mate, I tell you what, you have the greatest times of your life coming up.” says Dave.
“Yeah, bloody oath! You know, these are pretty big events. I get pretty wasted, so I need someone to clean up all my shit!” Dave’s reached his punchline, and promptly begins to laugh hysterically. I just laugh nervously. “Right.” Dave says, as he puts down the coffees and iced teas on the bench next to me. “I’ve got a few jokes for ya, you’re gonna love this.” He lights a cigarette, takes a sip of the coffee and stands in front of me. “You’re gonna love this!” he repeats.
“Twenty” I say.
“From now it’s just 21sts and weddings.” He whistles and waves his arm in an upwards fashion. This was when Dave gave me some of the best advice I’ve ever heard. “I tell you what though mate, when you have your 21st or your wedding, make it yours. Because if there’s one thing I learnt after getting divorced, it’s that life’s way too fucking short to not be yourself. Mate, look at me. I’m wearing a Russell Coight hat, a fucking Doggies sweater and shorts, what kind of idiot dresses like this? Me. I dress like this.” He takes a draw from his cigarette.
“Red paint.”
“Don’t be a fish or a sheep like everyone else, they all follow the herd. You’ve got one thing above everyone else and that’s that you’re you. There’s no one else in the world who has that. So I’ll tell you now, don’t wait until you’re bloody 34 to be yourself. From right this second, just be unapologetically yourself. Fuck everyone else, do what makes you happy. Because being yourself is the key to happiness.”
Dave loves it, and laughs again. “You’re alright” he says.
A complete stranger just delivered the most honest advice I’ve heard from anyone.
He then sits next to me, and extends his hand. “I’m Dave.”
I told him that I would, and he said he’d hold me to that.
“Tyler, pleasure to meet you mate.”
“Anyway, I’d better get moving.” He said, picking up his coffee tray and bag. “Wicked meeting you mate” As he shuffled his cigarette, tray and bag into one hand so he can shake mine.
He then tells me a few jokes, although I can’t remember what they are. I begin to relax, and share one of my own. “What’s red but smells like blue paint?” I say.
Luke Beveridge, for the non-footy lovers of you, is the coach of the Western Bulldogs the current AFL Premiers. Dave was sporting a Western Bulldogs Christmas-style sweater, so I figured he was a huge Doggies fan. The Bevo reference made sense. He then asked me what I’d bring to the job, apparently a janitor’s position. It was obvious now that Dave was having me on.
Dave then tells me about himself. How he got divorced two years ago, and moved to West Footscray. We talk a bit about footy, the Bulldog’s premiership win, and about Hawthorn (my team). He then informs me about a few great local pubs, and tells a few stories of houses he used to live in nearby. He asks me to look him up on Instagram and Facebook, and I promptly do so.
“If Luke Beveridge says I’m your guy, then I think
“Yeah mate, Dave MakoShark. M-A-K-O-Shark.
“The pleasure is all mine” I say, still trying to process everything Dave had just said. Dave then starts off down the road, before turning and saying “You got the job by the way, you start on Monday!” and we both laugh at each other, before I enter the café to buy my coffee. Just be yourself.
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May 2017
A UNIVERSITY STUDENT’S GUIDE TO SELF-CARE BY EMMA SOETERS
Are you struggling to pay attention during lectures? Tired? Overwhelmed? Do you find yourself counting down the days until mid-year break?
Take breaks
It’s okay to ask for extensions
Sometimes the best thing to do when you’re stressed is take a step back.
This is a guide to taking care of yourself while you’re studying at university, so you can get the most out of this experience without having to sacrifice your wellbeing.
We’ve all been there before: reading the same sentence over and over again, trying to work on an assignment when the words just aren’t coming to mind, getting frustrated with our own lack of progress.
Your tutors actually want you to pass the class! It can be easier to approach them for an extension on an assignment now, rather than worry about it closer to the deadline. If you think that you’re going to struggle to hand work in on time, please meet your tutors and discuss your situation with them so they can give you an extension if it’s necessary.
Take care of your body
Take a short break and get some fresh air. Half an hour thinking about something other than what’s stressing you out can change your perspective. Stress can make a molehill look like a mountain! When you come back to that work that seemed an equivalent feat to climbing Mount Everest, you might find it’s actually a hill that’s not so difficult to surmount.
Never underestimate how important it is to make sure that you’re functioning. Your study commitments shouldn’t take priority over getting enough sleep, food and physical activity. Without sleep, you’ll have difficulty concentrating and retaining information that you’ve learned. Pulling an all-nighter doesn’t make sense because you’ll be working inefficiently. Repeat after me: coffee or energy drinks aren’t a substitute for sleep! Please remember to eat regularly, especially during exam period. You’re at a greater risk of getting sick if you don’t meet your nutritional needs. Money-poor students can visit the Student Union office for a food package, no questions asked. Time-poor students can rely on the academic tradition of microwaved baked beans and packet noodles, or arrange to have dinner with a friend once in a while.
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Make time for what you enjoy Here’s a short list of things that you might enjoy: - Taking advantage of your Netflix subscription - Learning a new skill, such as knitting or playing guitar - Listening to music - Painting your nails (cost-effective fun!) - Taking a walk (doubles as exercise!) - Reading a book or magazine (Rabelais counts, you’re doing it already!)
Talk to someone if you’re doing it tough La Trobe University has great support services for students. Take advantage of the food bank, accessible through the Student Union office. Familiarise yourself with the rooms on campus specifically designated for women, queeridentifying and mature aged students. Counselling Services can be found on campus. They offer free sessions where you can disclose as much information as you feel comfortable, and discuss what’s going on with an impartial third party. There are dozens of clubs and societies which you can join at any time during the year, to meet other people who share your interests. You can find out more about them by asking at the Student Union office, or going to the website: www.latrobesu.org.au/clubs
Just talking to someone on the phone can help make things easier. Many organisations offer 24/7 anonymous support through their hotlines. Beyond Blue: 1300 22 4636 Kids Helpline, for people under 25 years old: 1800 55 1800
You are worth more than your grades Imagine that you had to describe yourself in ten words or less. You wouldn’t just say ‘I’m a university student’ and leave it there, right? If you don’t get the grades you hoped for when the end of semester comes around, please remember that they don’t measure ‘you’ in your entirety. Ten words couldn’t do you justice! You’re an amazing, complex individual with your own needs and desires. Self-care is all about recognising that your needs should be met. Hopefully, this guide has given you a better idea of how to take care of yourself while you’re here at university.
It’s important to achieve a balance between your obligations and time for yourself.
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May 2017
SWEET EATS ILLUSTRATIONS, PHOTOGRAPHY & ARTICLE BY JERRICA LOOI @JERRICALOOI ON INSTAGRAM
N2 What I got: a ‘Brokeback Moment’ ($9) I finally tried this infamous gelato, and yes, it was still delicious even being half-melted as I had taken too long to photograph it. IG @n2australia
SON IN LAW What I got: Thai Milk Tea Sizzling Roti ($14) The place was cozy and staff were as sweet as the roti I ate. I only wish that I had space in my belly for the delicious Thai food like on the couple’s table next to mine. IG @soninlaw_melb
HOKKAIDO BAKED CHEESE TART
PIDAPIPO What I got: two scoops of Rose-Honey-Nougat and Ricotta-Honey-Lemon-Lavender ($6.50) I was baffled to see that my options went from a single scoop to a one-litre tub. It all made sense when I got my gelato, I was tasting the joyful tears of mother nature herself. Their gelato is hand-made each day, and they have both milk-based and dairy-free gelatos, as well as hot Nutella. It was divine and well-worth my $6.50. If only I had gotten the tub. IG @pidapipo_gelateria
AQUA S
BETTY’S BURGERS
TWISTED SISTA
What I got: a ‘House-made’ Frozen Custard or ‘Concrete’ in Lemon Raspberry Cheesecake ($8)
What I got: a Gay-time Crunch Mega Milkshake ($13.95)
What I got: one Hokkaido Baked Cheese Tart ($3.90 each)
What I got: a Sea Salt Cone with palmier biscuit, mochi and fairy floss / cotton candy ($8)
This Frozen Custard’s texture was unlike anything I’ve had in other ice creams and proved to be quite the delight. I had to stop myself from eating it all before I could photograph it. I will be returning to have some more and also try their namesake burgers. Offmenu vegan options are also available. IG @bettys_burgers
Do yourself a favour and bring a date with you, I could barely finish one by myself. Other flavours include Berry Bliss, Choc Fudge Brownie, Cookie Monsta and more. The Northland branch is convenient for a spontaneous after-study snack and more if you’re lucky. They also have classic and quirky gelato flavours (one of which is banana and adorned with Minion figurines). IG @twistedsista_cafe
A single tart was not enough. It’s no wonder 20,000 of these lil’ guys are sold a day. I wasn’t the biggest fan of cheese until I had one. Prepare yourself for the sweet and savoury hug of sunshine you didn’t know you needed. IG @hokkaidoau
The Aqua S store is as cute as its product decked in pastels and photo-worthy. Their signature flavour Sea Salt is in their namesake colour - Aqua blue. You can also get popcorn, popping candy or a grilled marshmallow added to your cone. If that’s not enough, the soft-serve can be served on a slushy and new flavours are introduced fortnightly. IG @aquas_au
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THE TOP 8
May 2017
BY NINA SUNDAY “Change pen colour for each new topic,” says Nina. “Your notes become colour-coded to help you visually separate and recall the details of one topic from another.” BISTRO MORGAN
KITKAT CHOCOLATORY
What I got: two doughnuts ($5.50 each)
What I got: a 4-finger non-custom bar ($6)
Bistro Morgan belongs to sixteen year old Morgan Hipworth who is still attending school whilst running his own doughnut shop #Goals. Aside from the ‘Seriously Good Doughnuts’ you can also grab a custom doughnut ice cream sandwich, milkshakes and both sweet or savoury ‘Daffles’ a doughnut-jaffle hybrid. New flavours are offered each week so don’t forget to ask! IG @bistromorgan
If you need a last-minute gift, the KitKat Chocolatory has you covered. It’s stocked with unique flavours like passion fruit & chilli, matcha, espresso cookie hazelnut and more that are all regularly updated. If you’ve got more time to spare, you can drop by Melbourne Central to create a custom KitKat package, choosing your chocolate base, ingredients and even the box and flavour name. IG @kitkatanz
1. Preview for the big picture
5. Postview
Review your notes for a minute or so, skimming through the manageable chunk you’ve chosen to pick up the gist and flow of the information.
Perform a postview, scanning only those lines you have ticked or highlighted as important. By doing this you are reading only the important parts of the manageable chunk of information. This is your final ‘cram’ before starting to make your notes for immediate recall.
2. Use key headings Make an outline for your notes or memory map, dividing your page into segments and leaving space to add the detail later. Keep your headings short – use key words or short phrases only.
3. Read for understanding
SAN CHURRO What I got: ‘Churros for one’ ($8.95) I can’t wait to go back and try their funnel cake and fondue. Their cooked-fresh-to-order churros were a satisfying snack. IG @sanchurro_au
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GIRLS & BOYS What I got: a ‘Pimped Out Soft Serve’ of the day - Coconut-Vanilla with Pina Colada dressing ($12) This little vegan cafe in Fitzroy took me by surprise. With a veggie bar adjacent, you could grab something substantial (but still vegan) for later. It was efficient and still funky, with a giant wall of lights for you to enjoy with a smoothie, coffee, gelato or ‘Pimped Out Soft Serve’ in hand. One wouldn’t have thought to transform Pina Coladas into a sundae but they have done it with ease. I’ll be back to try the Baklava one! IG @girlsandboysfitzroy
Re-read your notes to acquire and absorb the information. For any important keyword or key idea that sums up what the sentence or paragraph is about, place a tick in the margin next to the line you are reading or highlight the key word. Remember the 80/20 rule: 80 per cent of the ideas come from around 20 per cent of the work.
6. Start note-taking – first from memory As soon as you have finished the postview, cover your reading material and add whatever you can immediately recall to your notes. Use the headings in your outline as memory triggers for the detail you’re adding.
7. Add notes, using another colour When your notes are complete with as much as you can retrieve from memory, only then open your reading material again. Go through the text and cross-reference, that is, check whatever you ticked or highlighted is included in your notes. If not, add it in using another colour. Take a ten-minute break.
4. Reread a little faster Reread to check you’ve absorbed everything truly important. Tick and highlight your notes if there is anything important you’ve missed before.
8. Retell After your ten minute break (no longer), verbalise what you can remember out loud to yourself or to someone you know. Review again after 48 hours, then 7 days.
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May 2017
Being a mother is a wonderful job. I want to congratulate every mother, including myself, who are successfully handling this responsibility. I want to thank my husband, too, for taking on that role in my absence.
THE HOMELESS PROBLEM
When I came to Melbourne to do my Master’s degree, I realised that staying away from my 3-yearold daughter Ira was going to be hard. People had told me before. But my answer was, “though I agree that being a mother is a blessing, is that the end of a woman’s life?”
BY ABOOD SHEHADA
Homelessness is a serious problem in Australia. The 2011 census found that 105,237 people in Australia, with just slightly more men than women, were homeless. Charity organisations except that this number will only dramatically grow. In Melbourne, the problem is only getting worse with more and more people, known as “rough sleepers” found sleeping in the CBD. In fact, a recent survey by the Melbourne City Council found that 247 people were sleeping in the streets of Melbourne CBD. This represents an increase of 74% in the past two years alone. In addition to this, charity organisations have stated that they have been overwhelmed by aid and housing requests with an unprecedented demand. However despite this growing crisis, homelessness was not mentioned a single time in the federal election which took place a year ago. If this wasn’t bad enough, the action of council officials have made the issue worse. On a number of occasions over the past year, police, on orders by the council, have removed homeless people from various locations around the CBD. This begins with police shutting down a homeless settlement in City Square and asking people to move on. In January of this year, people were removed from the CBD including along Flinders Street ahead of the Australian Open. Council officials have denied a connection between the timing of the actions and the Australian Open. This was preceded by the removal of a homeless camp under Sandridge Bridge, close to Southbank. At the end of January, police once again moved in to remove rough sleepers from along Flinders Street as well as protesters who had joined in solidarity with the homeless people. In addition to the removals, council officials have received over 200 complaints about rough sleepers in the CBD.
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To help solve this problem, charity groups including the Salvation Army and Launch Housing have ramped up efforts to find housing for rough sleepers. In addition, the Victorian state government announced in November of 2016 a $109 million plan to tackle homelessness across Victoria over the next 5 years. This plan will include money for building units, providing accommodation as well as aid payments and housing subsidies. It aims to help the 19,000 people who are suffering from homelessness. A further $9.8 million was announced in January of this year, with the money being spent to help move people on the streets of Melbourne into housing which will be built by the end of the year. This package also includes aid services such as for mental health and addiction. Launch Housing also signed an agreement with VicRoads in January to build 57 single bedroom units on empty land in Footscray and Maidstone. These will be filled by rough sleepers in the CBD. While the council and people may have legit concerns about the homelessness problem such as the people sleeping the street, drug use and increasing rubbish. This is no way to deal with people who are in trouble. We should be pushing the councils as well as state and federal governments to provide more money to helping get these people off the street, into proper housing and helping them get their lives back on track including through rehabilitation, education and employment. We should be sympathetic to people who have lost one of their basic human rights, not ashamed and try to hide them.
In Indian society, there are plenty of highly educated women who gave up their career, their passion and their ambition to bring up their children. But they have no idea that they are also losing their identity.
THE INDEPENDENT SHE BY GAYATARI VEDPATHAK
My mother was the most independent woman and my first role model. She told me to be a strong and independent lady who would never depend on another person, even her husband. You have permission to be strong, to be smart, to learn or not to learn, to wed or to stay single, to have children or not have children. It’s your life and you have a choice To be strong, you may have to make a tough decision, but you should believe in yourself. A woman can stand alone, but it doesn’t mean that she is alone, just strong enough to manage everything on her own. But for an Indian woman, her family is first no matter what. She is there to make sure her spouse, her children, and her family is content, but can forget her own existence and sense of self. She can forget that she has a right to live, a right to dream, and strive hard to turn that dream in to a reality. A family should push you to be yourself and achieve, but most importantly stand by you even when you want to stand alone. My husband encouraged me to pursue higher education. He knew that I wouldn’t give up and quit even after giving birth to our daughter. He stood by me. He’s a real, gentle man who can understand his wife’s dream of a career. “A man is truly gentle if he can understand a woman’s well-being.” I made the decision to go to La Trobe University. It took a lot of effort to get here – looking after my home, my daughter and concentrating on studying. But when I think of my daughter, I know that it’s worth it. You should be your child’s first role model, their mother, and let them learn from you. Don’t be idle, chase your dream, or they will never understand the value of chasing life. Wake up, be ambitious, and give your everything. Make yourself a powerful woman. The world is your oyster.
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May 2017
MASTERING THE ART OF PARENT HOOD Is conservative parenting just another form of slavery?
BY SHAN FRIEBE
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“Many parents are under the assumption that they own their children.” I’ve spent many nights casually chatting with- and occasionally venting to- my good friend, Will, as I labored my way through my Philosophy Honours degree last year. I’m pleased to say it all went well in the end, but it wasn’t without its obstacles, such as the first 5,000-word essay I had to write for the course. Will and I often discuss a wide variety of topics in great lengths, such as those attributed to politics, society and of course, my Philosophy degree every now and then. The essay I was writing at the time examined the psychological relationship between masters and slaves, particularly how the master governs the slave by reducing them to a lifeless entity in order to remind the master of their own power and authority. Therefore, the slave is lesser than human and nothing without the master’s governance. This sounded all too familiar as I knew of parents who repressed their children with the agenda of inflicting their own beliefs upon them, or putting limits on their children’s goals and dreams because they were not in accordance with their own expectations, thus sacrificing their child’s freedom and happiness in the process. So I asked Will if he believed there was a correlation between dictatorial parenting and soft slavery. He replied with the opening quote of this paragraph. To understand what it means to ‘own’ a child is to understand what it means to simply ‘own’. Coming to own something- in most cases- means purchasing or accumulating a material object or a creature inferior to humans to not only fulfil the desires of the owner, but to adjust and utilize the object according to how the owner pleases. When a parent does not value their child’s individuality and their right to selfgovern, it matters not how wise or capable the child is: the main objective for the master parent is not to Build a Responsible Adult™, nor is it to preserve their childhood out of fearing of their children becoming independent adults. Conservative parenting has little to do with understanding and respecting the identity of their child or accepting their changing needs and desires. The parent’s objective is to diminish the personhood of a child until it becomes a compliant servant who will live out the dreams and demands of the parent. If this sounds far-fetched, don’t take it from me but take it from the philosophical masters themselves, if you pardon the pun.
Under Roger Deacon’s theory, a child who is not a ‘slave’ masters themselves because they possess a priori knowledge of their self-worth; in other words, they know their self-worth is real, independent of other factors, most likely because their parents have confirmed this truth to them. This means the liberated child of any age understands that only they are entitled to govern their own lives because they know they are beings of individual worth. The master parent, on the other hand, does not raise a confident child but a detached, contingent one. Frederick Nietzsche describes a slave as “passive” and “powerless, the oppressed, those festering with poisonous and hostile feelings”. The slave child therefore experiences resentment, justifying why many suppressed children rebel eventually, either by exerting distressed emotions, running away, lashing out violently and engaging in self-destructive behaviour. After all, it is feasible to see how stress, anxiety and depression can arise from an individual’s loss of agency, because humans are not meant to be owned, at least forever. When it comes to the making of a master parent, Deacon declares that mastery is explicitly “confined to an elite”, illustrating not only a hierarchical division between master and slave, but that the master, unlike the slave, believes they are entitled to not only master themselves, but dominate over their slaves because, well, they are happy to do so. The master is content and self-affirmed, believing they are “complete men, overloaded with power and thus necessarily active” in governing their world. So ego and narcissism is also involved here, as well as the natural lust for power. But how is it that the parent succeeds in dominating over their agentless child? Aside from holding unwavering beliefs of their own, an overbearing mother or father will demand nothing but obedience from their offspring, but when the child shows signs of resistance- such as pursuing a path in life they choose themselvesthey are punished. These parents will indoctrinate their submissive children into feeling guilty for not obeying their demands, and at times, threaten with intimidation, strict curfews, shaming and even violence. They do this via tirades of verbal abuse, yelling, pointing fingers, name-calling, throwing or breaking things- most preferably objects of importance to the submissive child. This kind of radical behaviour is in the same vicinity of the
spine-chilling exchange between Dirk Diggler and his overbearing mother in the 1997 classic, Boogie Nights: “You’re a loser! You’ve always been a loser… stupid!” They then abandon the child they never asked for, disregarding their individual merits and failing to praise and support their personhood: “You leave here; you leave with what you’ve got: nothing!” If the master parent can’t have a slave, they don’t want the child, and now the lines between human being and non-human entity is tragically blurred. The defenseless child is now a non-self, deserving of any blame and abuse cast upon them. Sadly, many children around the world- young or grown- can empathize with this scenario. Conservative parenting evidently extends beyond the comfort of our Western homes, and in significantly more unfortunate, extreme cases, some young women in the Middle East are stoned for dishonoring not themselves, but their families and communities, further adding salt to the injury of the child betraying the values of their community. In devout Christian communities across Central Africa, young girls are circumcised upon reaching puberty to discourage them from a life of promiscuity and immodesty. These communities are run by masters bound by strict customs, ideas of honour, pride and loyalty to culture and community, and are motivated to punish all those who insult their integrity. The slave children who disobey their masters are traitors, and live like masters estranged from cultural constraints, until they succumb to chastisement. In the master’s world, there is peace until resistance. It is idiotic to claim modern day conservative parenting in Western countries is comparable to conservative parenting in developing countries, but the foundations of similarity remain. And do not be fooled: the domestic prison sentence does not end when the child extinguishes their eighteen birthday candles. For many, it is the only beginning, as total freedom entitled to the adult child is restricted beyond the reaches of the supreme court. In Plato’s allegory, a prisoner realizes his self-worth upon escaping the cave he was held captive within, similar to how individuals are thrown into the world via their birth. Upon being enlightened, it is the prisoner’s duty to return to the cave and educate the unenlightened prisoners, not govern them. After all, the human is master to no one but themselves.
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HORROR AND HOPE:
May 2017
THE WORST HUMANATARIAN CRISIS IN 73 YEARS BY TONY MILINE,
DIRECTOR, CAMPAIGN FOR AUSTRALIAN AID One and a half million children facing death from hunger. It’s a confronting reality and so it should be. The situation is so dire, UN officials are calling the famine gripping East Africa and Yemen, the worst humanitarian crisis since the end of the Second World War. The rapidly escalating food crisis unfolding in Yemen, South Sudan, Somalia and Nigeria, is becoming known as the ‘Four Famines’.
Right now, the world is desperate for courageous leadership. The kind of global leadership we see the Government referring to over and over again. Australia has the ability to lead the way by making a bold announcement of funding and calling on other countries to do the same. Of course, the Government can also continue to stand by, commit to doing the bare minimum and hope Australians don’t notice.
Nobody’s life is worth more than another person’s - we imagine a world where all people, regardless of their gender, race or place of birth, live a free, happy and healthy life. Opportunities in life shouldn’t be based on the luck of where you’re born. People all over the world share the same hopes and dreams.
Contrary to the belief of some, this funding is not welfare, it’s justice. The decisions of the developed world have helped cause the climate change that has led to drought and stood by while conflict has deepened in these countries. We have a moral responsibility to act. This emergency money would provide immediate food to children and pregnant women so they can breastfeed infants. It helps to respond tothe effects of malnutrition and gives people access to healthcare. This funding helps the next generation of people living through this humanitarian crisis and the ability to make a better future, a reality. Australians care about others, are compassionate and want to work together with others to rectify injustice and ease suffering.
Every single life is precious and each day, the famine crisis is worsening. Each day,we see more and more disturbing images filter through in pockets of the media. As horrendous as the situation is, there is hope. The UN has said that $5.8 (AUD) billion is needed by this July to avert a catastrophe. If the global community acts now, we may be able to prevent the worst and help one and a half million children at risk to have a chance at life.
The f-word is used reluctantly by the UN and has a very specific definition and the following criteria: 1.Over 20 percent of households don’t get the recommended caloric intake daily 2.Over 30 percent of people are in a state of malnutrition 3.There are two deaths per 10,000 people daily
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Will the Australian Government reflect those values or will it stand by while the equivalent of almost the entire population of this country faces a severe food crisis? There is hope if the global community acts now - if you believe Foreign Minister Julie Bishop needs to act boldly and urgently before it’s too late, join over 15K people and sign this petition that calls on Australia to at least double its current contribution levels: http://australianaid. org/action/famine/ Edition Three/ Page 35
May 2017
THE CASE FOR UNIVERSAL BASIC INCOME BY BELYAN MATTHEWS
The concept of a universal basic income (UBI) has been flirted with for centuries, yet its relevance and potential necessity has never been greater. Back in 1516, Thomas More wrote of a universal basic income in his book Utopia, and as we are currently far from such an optimistic state of affairs, it seems a good time to revisit the idea. So what is a UBI? It does not stray far from what the name suggests, consisting of providing a regular subsistent wage to every resident of a particular geographic location, though some trials have focussed instead on a demographic (such as the unemployed). This income is not enough to make anyone rich, but it is enough to eliminate the stress and risk of falling below the poverty line. The maximum rate of payment for a single person on Newstart (including rent assistance and other supplementary payments) was $97 below the $400 poverty line for a single adult in Australia (Australian Council of Social Service, 2015). In replacing a means-tested, income dependant, social welfare system, the UBI provides a security our current social services do not. We do already have social welfare in Australia, and don’t get me wrong, Centrelink is a service I have personally been thankful for my entire life. However, growing up in a single-parent, lowincome family, I noticed that the ins and outs of navigating the Centrelink system to be not only evidence of the inefficiency of bureaucracy, but also that it discourages working extra hours when receiving payments, as the benefits lost makes it not worthwhile. Thus, the system as it is does not incentivise an increase in economic productivity. The UBI provides the security of a minimum wage to
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combat growing employment instability. In doing so, it encourages social mobility, as well as creative and career risks that can advance society both culturally and economically. Where Centrelink’s complex, time consuming and ever-changing system wastes money and can be challenging to navigate for those who need it most to survive, the UBI’s fixed-rate and universality appears to be able to allocate benefits more efficiently and directly, as well as providing a long-term security for the beneficiaries. The capitalist model of our society and economy relies on inequality to function. For some to become richer, others must become poorer. Exploitation of labour of the masses enables the richest few to continue to increase in wealth, while simultaneously dwindle in number. The UBI has the potential to retain the benefits of market competition, while also allowing all citizens true equal freedom of opportunity for social mobility and economic success. It is not about ensuring everyone earns the same wage, but rather seeking to counter-balance the tendency for those born in wealthy families to themselves become rich, and those born into poverty to live their lives in the same cycle of economic hardship that their parents faced. It is about empowering the UNemployed and UNDERemployed. Which in turn would allow the low-income earners, with an equal opportunity to reach their career and education goals. It would also enable a balanced work-life for people on every point of the income spectrum. Thus, providing the possibility of greater creative, cultural, technological and intellectual advancement. It releases us from the stresses of meeting basic daily needs such as rent and food costs every week. Not only would us students benefit from the implementation or trial of a UBI, but so would stay-at-home parents and others who sacrifice
their employment opportunities to care for family members, such as the elderly and disabled. Would a UBI discourage productivity, decrease competition or stump motivation? Far from it. The UBI trials already conducted around the world prove its success. In June 2015, Sovorno, Italy trialled a UBI to the 100 poorest families in the small city, which was extended in January this year. Many trials have been conducted in India, such as Madhya Pradesh in 2010, where for 18 months financial security was provided to every adult and child across 8 villages, with significant increase in infant nutrition, school attendance and healthcare. Finland is set to roll out a large-scale trial which will benefit 10,000 residents for two years. There are a variety of approaches to trialling the concept, which is necessary, given that each country and culture has different needs to be met and resources available to meet them. The only way we can find out what works though, is to TRY. The willingness to continue these attempts by the governments who have already implemented them, is a testament to their prospective benefit to us all. While workplace productivity is steadily increasing, penalty rates have been slashed and wages are not growing at the same rate as capital. Casual, short term and ‘flexible’ employment is on the rise, leading to a lack of regular and long term financial security for minimum wage earners and middle class. The UBI provides an alternative to our broken social welfare system and could help to combat growing wealth inequality around the world. It by no means is a cure for all our societal ails, but could be a significant step in liberating those who struggle the most, in simply keeping them afloat.
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All LTU students can access our support services
ADVOCATES Help with academic and administrative problems within La Trobe
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NATIONAL UNION OF STUDENTS BY JILL MOLLOY Recently, Mr Birmingham said students aren’t completing their degrees because they’re not putting enough thought and consideration into what they study. I disagree with this statement entirely, it’s out of touch and unhelpful. Students are not able to finish their degrees because of the cost of living and all the stresses associated to this. My name is Jill Molloy and at the end of 2016 I was elected as the welfare officer for the National Union of Students (for 2017) for which I am very grateful. As the welfare officer, my job is to develop and roll-out campaigns across campuses around the country, while raising awareness and lobbying the government around welfare issues. The university experience can be an incredible time to find ourselves, however I’ve also seen it as a time that can be plagued with stress around finance or a lack of available support systems.
May 2017
And we’re not stopping here. Given the announcement of cuts to penalty rates in industries like hospitality and retail, which are typically occupied by students, it has been necessary to launch the next part of the campaign. This was released just last week, and is titled ‘Your Rights at Work’. This campaign will focus on the importance of penalty rates for already low income earners, the issue of junior pay rates, speaking against unpaid and underpaid internships, as well as making sure casual and part time workers know what they should be getting paid. With this, we hope to make sure that student associations around the country are equipped to help inform working students of their rights. In addition, the second semester will see the NUS Welfare Department look into on-campus mental health services, disability and carer support, and the launch of a national housing audit regarding the cost of student housing. Concurrently to the Your Rights at Work, Uni and Home campaign, I will also be running a collaborative campaign with The Butterfly Foundation regarding body image and body positivity. This is an issue very close to my heart and an issue that can affect anyone. All in all, university should be an enriching and rewarding experience for every single student. In order to make this possible, I really encourage everyone to keep up with the campaigns and get involved! https://www.megaphone.org.au/petitions/ fixcentrelinknow-it-s-time
This why the NUS Welfare Department has launched the campaign Your Rights at Work, Uni & Home. We’ve launched a petition to #FixCentrelinkNow, which responds to the Centrelink debacle. The automated debt-recovery scheme has seen Centrelink send fake debt notices to students because of issues with the cross referencing of data. Not to mention, in order to prove the debt is illegitimate, the onus is on the individual. This issue has made many angry, and our petition has gathered more than 2,500 signatures around the country. Moreover, the campaign has focused on the call waiting times and pay delays which are a source of unfair and unnecessary stress for welfare recipients. Around these issues, we’ve had thousands of conversations and lobbied members of parliament to highlight the impact of a failing safety net for struggling students.
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May 2017
AURORA INTERNSHIP BY JESSIE LEA SKILLICORN I like to joke that I ‘bloomed late,’ starting University at the tender age of 30. For the first year I was in awe of the fact that I was finally here at university. I was doing it! I had almost forgotten that there were a million other opportunities available to me, so when my anthropology lecturer mentioned the Aurora Internship Program, my interest was piqued. I decided it was worth giving it a go; I would apply and see what the interview process was all about. I certainly never imagined that I would be offered the internship. I was heading to Central Land Council (CLC) in Alice Springs! Leaving the cold Melbourne winter and heading to sunny Alice Springs where the weather was still hitting 28 degrees was a huge added bonus. I began to organise and prepare to present my best ‘intern’ self by enquiring as to the dress code at CLC. I was sent a text from my soon-to-be supervisor saying that the dress code was neat casual, adding that there was absolutely no bare-feet in the office, not even just to go to the photocopier! Right. All sounding very relaxed, and that was exactly the vibe I came to expect in the CLC office. CLC staff were casual yet professional, friendly, fun, welcoming and warm, while at the same time hard working, passionate and insightful. CLC are a well-resourced and supportive organisation. They arranged to have me picked up from the airport and took me for a quick meet and greet at the office. Everyone came up to eagerly introduce themselves and make me feel welcomed and comfortable in the office. This was the case for my entire internship. People constantly introduced themselves to me and checked in to see how I was going and even asked me things like “Who is your favourite anthropologist?” – a question I still don’t know the answer to. During my time at CLC I was given a whole bunch of research tasks regarding local Aboriginal groups within the Northern Territory, their cultural similarities and differences, as well as intricate skin systems. My personal expectations were that I was
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the intern and the intern was the slave. But nobody was giving me any mundane office jobs! I have learned so much, and the few occasions that I did some shredding, printing or photocopying, I made sure I always kept my shoes on. I feel like I have a better understanding of some of the fundamentals of Aboriginal Communities, of how Native Title works and how places like CLC work to make Native Title claims a reality for the communities they work for. I have an in-depth knowledge of Walpiri Skin Systems, including Kirda (patrilineal) and Kurdungurlu (matrilineal) and the local Jukurrpa (dreaming tracks). The sub-section systems and Kirda/Kurdungurlu are interrelated classification systems that relate to who can marry who, as well as who is responsible for dreamings and ceremonies. For CLC workers to work well with their indigenous clients, they require an intricate understanding of how local cultures work, and this is illustrated throughout the office with many staff speaking fluent Aranda language as well as other language groups from the Northern Territory area. I also had the privilege of accompanying another anthropologist from CLC on a trip to Arlparra, in Utopia, during which I was able to exercise my fine fire making skills. This trip gave me first-hand experience of what anthropologists do in Aboriginal communities and how they consult with traditional owners to get clearances for work in communities. All in all, my internship with CLC was a unique experience which I will always remember. The visit has developed my knowledge and interest in anthropology, Aboriginal Australia and Native Title. I would encourage anyone to apply for an Aurora internship, and seek out their own unique internship experience. http://www.auroraproject.com.au/ aurorainternshipprogram. Applications for Summer and Winter 2018 open August 2017.
TWO BIRDS ONE SCONE:
CLUB AT LA TROBE UNIVERSITY BY MELISSA LEE PRESIDENT
VISION: “not about changing the world, but changing someone’s world…” Having saved 3, 500 kg of unsold food collected from campus vendors in 2016, Two Birds One Scone continues to minimize food wastage by collecting, packing and distributing to local churches for community lunches and diners with the disadvantaged. Collecting from over 8 vendors in La Trobe University, student volunteers take some of their time after university hours, to collect and package unsold food, otherwise trashed at the end of each day. We have been mentioned to be one of the “fastest growing clubs in La Trobe University history” and with the support of the Student Union and student volunteers, the club has been of great success. We aim to grow nationally and magnify our services. Having expanded to Monash University under a different name, the idea of every college in Australia doing what we do pushes us to work harder and move beyond our comfort zone. Future plans involve sanitary and hygiene products being distributed along with the food, donated by students on campus. We are also aiming to initiate a student-tutoring program for unfortunate kids in our local area, giving La Trobe University ‘Education’ students an opportunity to not only gain some experience in their field, but help a child through their struggles. We would like to thank Café Veloci, Bake n Bean, Caffeine, Café Spice, Grain Express, Fuel Juice and Charlie’s for contributing to our cause and being so supportive. A big thanks also goes out to the Student Union for being our day one supporters and our very own volunteers. Looking forward to another successful year! For volunteering enquiries please contact me: twobirdsmelbourne@gmail.com +61 434 436 039
www.auroraproject.com.au
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BOARD GAMES BY MATTHEW SEAN DEVLIN What do I look for in a board game? My friends and I have been asking ourselves this question over the last few months. It is something we enjoy thinking about. What attracts us to certain games and certain mechanisms over others? For those who are unaware, we are currently in the midst of a modern board game revolution. Back in the 90s, a few euro-games made their way across the ocean and captured the imaginations of gamers everywhere, sparking a surge in the board game industry. They were simple, elegant games: Settlers of Catan, Carcassonne, and El Grande. The difference between these games and other popular games of the time, such as Monopoly and Scrabble, is the mitigation of luck. Monopoly, for example, is almost entirely based on luck; you roll the dice and move that many spaces. This is effective in making each roll of the dice exciting, as the player is hoping to land on specific spots while, at the same time, avoiding others. Perhaps the designers wanted players focusing more on negotiation than manoeuvring their pieces around the board. In Settlers of Catan, on the other hand, the dice are rolled at the start of each turn; their value determines which hexes on the board produce resources. However, it is up to the player to decide where they will place their settlements. They know that, with two dice, a 6 is far more likely to be rolled than a 2 – so building a settlement adjacent to a 6 will produce resources more often. The result of dice remains random, but the players can choose which risks they wish to take. These games are now considered old, but they In a game like El Grande, in which players are
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vying for a control of Spain by placing agents and manipulating the king, there are no dice at all. Each round five ctions are made available and players bid on which action they wish to take. After bidding, the actions are taken and pieces are added to and moved around the board. At first glance, El Grande might appear overly simplistic and chaotic but I assure you it is not. In a game with little to no luck, victory requires some very clever planning and manipulation. remain among my favourites; El Grande, especially, is among my most coveted possessions. They are classics, and their influence can be felt in most modern board games today. So, what do I want in a board game? In a few words, that might appear somewhat contradictory, I want control and restriction. I want my actions to be limited and, therefore, made meaningful. When my choices are restricted and I must operate within a set of rules, each decision feels significant. Unlike some of my friends, I don’t enjoy games that offer complete freedom in what I do. As quite an introverted person, I particularly like games that facilitate social interaction between me and my friends. I definitely prefer Cosmic Encounter, Pandemic, and Troyes over heavy, dry games like Caverna.
May 2017
COSMOSIS BY LACHLAN REARDON A POEM ABOUT MENTAL HEALTH Aren’t you made from the same stuff as stars? The same comets and planets that lead you to drink in whiskey bars? If you die in the middle of the night, then your ambitions will die with you. Your drive and your thoughts will all be for naught if your death occurs. Take up a seat for two and ask inside if your self-referencing word should be I, me or you. Create some self-reverence mixed with self-loathing and ask yourself if you want to be drunk, sober or stoned. You’re one-hundred years old with frail bones that causing wailing moans. Arthritic bones mixed with gin leads to pained knuckles and worrying.
If you haven’t looked into it, I highly recommend checking out some of the games that have been released over the last ten or so years. One of the things about discovering something you love is that you feel compelled to share it with everyone. When it comes to board games, there has never been a better time to be alive.
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May 2017
Student Wellbeing services at La Trobe University provide a range of supports and programs to promote inclusion, diversity and wellbeing. While many students might be aware that we have free counselling and disability support at La Trobe, they might not be aware of some of our other programs, such as our LGBTIQ supports, our support program for students with a refugee background or our new SPEAK UP service.
If you’re questioning, coming out, or you’re out and want to connect with other people dealing with similar experiences, come and join us! You can contact the Bundoora Campus Queer Counsellor on 9479 2956, or by Student Wellbeing also run ALLY training for staff and students to help the La Trobe community better understand the lived experience of LGBTIQ staff and students and create more inclusive campuses. For further information see www. latrobe.edu.au/LGBTIQ email at counselling@latrobe.edu.au.
The Counselling Service
STUDENT WELLBEING
The Counselling Service provide free and confidential short-term counselling for La Trobe University students. We also have specialist counsellors such as our Indigenous Counsellor, our Queer Counsellor and CASA (Centre Against Sexual Assault) staff available one afternoon a week, beginning in May. Check out the Counselling website to find out how to make an appointment and to learn more about our free group sessions and workshops around study-related skills, health and wellbeing at each campus. www.latrobe.edu/counselling
Queer Supports The La Trobe University Counselling Service is actively queer-friendly! We have a dedicated Queer Counsellor at our free, confidential counselling service. We also organise the Pride Festival (usually week 4 of semester 1) and celebrations of awareness days at Bundoora to increase visibility and safety for our students of diverse sexuality and gender. We run a Queer Chat group, co-facilitated by the Queer Counsellor and Queer Peer students, which is a safe space to meet other likeminded students and chat about all things queer over lunch every week. It’s light and fun but there is also space to share hard times with people who understand, or you can just listen. Queer Chat celebrates all genders and sexualities (including bisexual, pansexual, fluid, asexual, questioning, transgender, non-binary and intersex students). Edition Three/ Page 44
Disability and Equity Supports If you are a student with a disability, mental health issue or ongoing medical condition or if you care for a person with a disability, Disability Advisers can help you meet the requirements of your course. They can look at what is happening as a result of your condition and recommend adjustments to assessment and academic requirements as well as advice on managing university study. If you have a condition and are concerned about your study, working in groups, going on placement or work experience or just don’t know what is available, make an appointment to meet a Disability Advisor or go to our website www.latrobe.edu. au/disability for more information. In addition to supporting students with a disability, Student Wellbeing also offer a range of bursaries which aim to support students from particular Equity Groups, such as the Care Leaver bursaries (for students who have spent time in foster, kinship or formal out-ofhome care) Equipment Bursaries for low SES students experiencing disadvantage and Travel Bursaries. We also have a support program for students from a refugee background which provides some financial support and a contact officer on each campus (information available at www.latrobe.edu.au/refugee). See our low-incomewebpage for more details on our bursaries www.latrobe.edu.au/lowincome
Speak Up This is a new service designed to assist students with unacceptable or difficult behaviour. We’ve designed the Speak Up service to help you get support for yourself and others in relation to intimidation, harassment, discrimination, all forms of violence (including sexual and physical assault), and other forms of unacceptable behaviour. You can also use the service to flag welfare concerns, including behaviour that is negatively impacting an individual or group, mental health concerns or any other concerns related to behaviour or wellbeing. So Speak Up and get advice and support from our experienced and supportive staff. Information available at www.latrobe.edu.au/speakup
Respect at La Trobe University Respect a La Trobe is about promoting and embedding a culture where everybody respects each other and their differences even if this can be challenging at times. Promoting respectful relationships, addressing and preventing unacceptable behaviour is a priority. We want to create an engaging university experience, where everyone can get involved and participate as fully as possible. To achieve this, we need to provide a University environment where everyone feels safe, supported and encouraged to actively participate in and contribute to our community. We all have a role to play in contributing to this environment and we want students and staff to role model respectful behaviours and to challenge or report behaviours, which are unacceptable in a respectful manner. If you would like to learn more about the programs and supports run through Student Wellbeing, check out our webpage at www. latrobe.edu.au/wellbeing
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May 2017 This is your first degree, however you entered as a mature aged student. Why is that? I suppose I found my course through five gap years.
I studied in Argentina when I was 17 and that led
HUMANS OF LA TROBE
me to seek work in the education department. I was working at an English Language school for a few years. However all the teachers there were more than just teachers. Some were artists etc.… That inspired me to go further with my studies. I found myself doing the Bachelor of Arts Majoring in Linguistics. That was too scientific to me. So you mentioned travelling and studying abroad when you were 17? This led you to go straight into the work force for nearly 5 years. How did this come about?
BY KEVIN KAPEKE AND KAYTLIN HANCOCK
So I did my schooling in Canberra. It’s worth noting that we have high school to year 10, and then the remaining two years you go to college. So it’s more of a university setting. More relaxed. I was bored. I wasn’t interested in what I was doing. I needed to explore. I didn’t really choose Argentina, I spun a world map and it landed on Argentina and here I am now.
Bachelor of International Development
You travelled for one year at the age of 17. How was the experience? Did you live by yourself?
Why did you choose your course? I initially started out in a Bachelor of Arts. I remember in my first year in Spanish class we went round the room saying what our aspirations were and how we were getting there. There was a girl sitting next to me who had similar aspirations as me – wanting to work for refugees and she was studying International development. I didn’t even know it was a thing. I transferred immediately. I think the things taught in International Development are values and lessons that we all need to know seeing the way the world is now.
I lived with a family, a host family, in a little village in the south of Argentina. It was a cultural exchange so it wasn’t academically challenging. The culture shock wasn’t too much. The family unit took some getting used to but it wasn’t too bad. It took me about 6 months to grasp the language though. So that was one year, what about the other 4 years? Was university never on your radar? I never anticipated going to university. My father set some money aside to help me with my studies but I was always adamant I wouldn’t go to university. It wasn’t until I was working full time that I realised I had more ambition than sitting in an office all day. I had more energy than that. Tell us about your university. La Trobe. What’s the campus like for you? How often are you on campus during the week? I’m here about 4 days a week. However I’ve been working in marketing for La Trobe Melbourne about the entirety of my course. So I’m here all the time. I don’t take part in many activities around campus. I’m not in clubs and associations or out in the agora
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doing stuff, but I love the atmosphere. I like that it’s far away. It smells amazing. It’s in nature, its more calming. I quite like that. What do you think the university could improve? Good question! Hard question! I think the staffing situation and what’s happening in the agora with cuts to education. I guess that’s more in the hands of the Government but I think the university is investing in things we don’t realise. We are however confronted with these cuts and our classes are disappearing and so are our teachers. So we tend to realise that more. Well I mean my course has disappeared so yes, we tend to realise that more. I know you take an interest in Global Politics and America plays a big part in your life for a few reasons. What do you think of their political climate? Donald trump? Yay or nay? I’ve seen this question a couple of times actually in the previous editions! Has anyone said ‘yay’ yet? (*Kevin shakes head*). Well there you go. I think the way the situation is, its normalising evil. What I’ve learnt about the United States has been through the lenses of Latin America. And the atrocities they’ve caused in that region are plenty fold. I do think Donald trump is validating racism. It’s not quite fair. I am moving to the United States upon completing my degree. So it is a difficult time. Yeah, not a fan. It’s waking people up though and that’s a good thing.
So what’s your next step? What’s your 10-year plan? Well I currently am just waiting on my VISA for the United States as I am moving there. I want to study a Master’s of Juris Prudence in International Development at the university of Washington. In ten years I hope to have my Masters! I want to be working in Policy between the United States and Mexico and helping migrants get into the United States. The boarder crossing from Mexico into the United States is one of the most dangerous migrant tracks in the world. There’s this train called ‘The Beast’ and all the poorest migrants jump on top of in order to get into the United States. There’s police, gangstas, human traffickers, corruption – the lot. It’s a very dangerous route. I think only about 50% make it, or perhaps much less! What’s your advice for incoming university students? What are mistakes you made that you can advice us not to make? I think I would confidently say find opportunities to further your prospects. Whether its internships, exchange, talk to your teachers, because there’s always stuff out there. And the academic staff know what’s out there. Make yourself known to relevant staff because there will help you. I wish I had looked for more opportunities. I wish I had networked better or even made a LinkedIn account earlier. Maybe joined the Rabelais team or even the student union. There’s a lot one can do at university.
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May 2017
COLD COFFEE BY EAMONN MCGRATH-LESTER
You wore a red jacket that day. The jacket was a good choice; it was cold outside where you sat. Though, I feel that you would have worn it had it been thirty degrees warmer - for that was your ‘going out’ jacket. Aviator sunglasses shielded your likely hideous eyes from a nonexistent sun. You sat there rolling a cigarette. From the look of you it was clear you had done that many, many times before. Your skin was wrinkled like a sultana. Unlike a sultana, though, you would not be rejuvenated when placed in water – born again, plump and juicy. No, you would simply drown. The spawn of Satan is not taught to swim. I remember not your hair, but for the sake narrative flair and ammunition to insult, let us say that you were bald – pink and grey spots clinging to your dry scalp. Your voice was husky, but not the sexy kind. If you were on the radio, receivers all over the world would spontaneously combust. Death by fire, a more palatable option than listening to the metal-on-metal rasp that escapes from your mouth. I would describe you as a rough bloke, but that would be insulting to rough blokes. You were something else. “Hey mate,” I say with all the faux-hospitalityhappy I could muster. “What can I get for you?” “Large cappuccino,” you excrete from your weathered and leathery lips. I walk back inside. Order up! A large cappuccino you did not receive. Shame.
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You brought me over The Abomination: the small cappuccino. This is not what you asked or, you tell me. I apologise. It was cold, you tell me. (Read: not hot enough for you.) Once more I apologise. I did not make that one, I tell you. I will take The Abomination from your scaly hands and make you exactly what you ordered. But this did not satisfy your insatiable craving for conflict. You could never help yourself, could you? “But I told you what I ordered!” You poke at my chest with a knobbly, arthritic finger. Not hard enough to hurt - no, that would have broken your calcium deprived bones - but hard enough to assert your perceived dominance over me. I drop my hospo charm and tell you again that I did not make this one and that your temperature woes are not my problem. Impolite on my behalf, I know. But we all make mistakes – I know you certainly have. You storm out. I make your coffee.
Knowing you have been beaten by logic, you resort to a thing you know so very well; misplaced anger. “Oh fuck off!” you reply. Admittedly, you did catch me off guard. “Excuse me?” I ask with all the embarrassing sass of a teacher who has lost control of their classroom. Once again, you storm out, slamming the door. I am sorry. I am sorry that life has made you this way. That your parents never really loved you the way they loved their other kids, your brothers and sisters. I am sorry that school wasn’t easy for you. Numbers and letters can be really tricky, I know. I am sorry that people weren’t always nice to you because of your droopy eye. I am sorry that your dreams and ambitions were replaced by substances that gave you an ephemeral sense of
After our previous run in, I decide to stay silent. I deliver your large, hot coffee and scurry away, hoping not to anger you further. Oh, but unbeknownst to me, I did.
accomplishment. I am sorry that in your darkest moments you see yourself for the failure that you have truly become. I am sorry that anger bubbles away inside you, that it consumes you and keeps you awake at night. I am sorry for your miserable existence.
As the minutes pass I relax, thinking that you are satisfied, that the stars have realigned and that the demons that live within you have calmed, no longer gnawing at your soul. But there you are, darkening my doorway. Interrupting a conversation I am having with another customer, your anus-mouth spews the question: “Mate, what’s with all the cold coffees?!”
But I do feel for you. Life is hard. Sometimes we ask the universe for hot, but it gives us cold. Sometimes we pray to God for large, but he gives us small. But it does get easier. I know it does. Anger subsides, love finds us and we find love. The storm clouds of the mind clear and an eternal calm begins to grow within us. Life does get better. Until then, we’ve just got to keep swimming. Alas, you never learnt.
That is the hottest I can make without burning the milk, I lie – I had burnt the milk already. The smell still clung to the back of my throat.
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TWO YEARS LONLEY BY KELLY WALKER
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I haven’t had a job in over two years. Well, I had a job, poor excuses for one really, but I looked after my study, you see? I came to the game late, so I wanted to make sure I did this uni thing right. But look what happened? Younger kids with more experience are getting the jobs I want, my cover letters aren’t even getting interviews, and my savings are running out. So where does this leave me? Volunteering. Sounds good. But with bills looming, youth allowance isn’t going to keep me above water for long. What about a casual job, one that isn’t in my field? Well, I tried that too but a job in a clothing store can need a bachelor’s degree in commerce, and a position in a garden shop needs horticulture experience. I’m generalising, I know, but I’m scared, and my phone isn’t buzzing. I’m putting lots of effort into my cover letters; researching the company’s values and making sure I say how good they are. But along comes the ‘unfortunately…’ email. So what do I do now? Write off my $40,000 professional writing degree and get a trade? I don’t know. All I know is I’m not far off having to borrow my way out of this, and I might have to move to the country one day, which sucks because I’ve just gotten used to the trams.
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May 2017
SONGS OF PROSERPINE BY JACOB PILKINGTON
I cannot stop the screaming my lover’s-corpse emits, I cannot stop the singing from the gashes in my wrists. I vomit blood over graves I pass – Their inscriptions say “Dickinson”, “Poe” Martyr to the torments I created, Like Wells’ Doctor Moreau. Now I run with wolves, For the cheery hunt, the scent of blood – Eyes are laughing like needles in the night. I would have all the murder I could. She helped me to sharpen the blade discreetly, To pause at the belly and tip it in. The blade seared through my belly, The wound exclaimed deeply And teased through the flesh Like a lover’s ode. To smile and caress with a telling soul Rip up and down feeling the belly explode Lift left and right without the kiss So alarmingly felt in Hari Kari. Now I roam with the spirits From town’s graveyard to the moor. Trembling in investiture. I wheedle and wail in those horror hours, I shriek with banshees, I impinge with the ghosts, Laid bare like stark nothingness. I recount with the goblins That time you left me in the dark When I thought you would lead me to light.
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She lay me tenderly on the table And sliced down my neck and chest to my navel. My intestines she lovingly placed in a jar; As so my kidneys, pelvis, my liver, In glass jars I feel my body parts given And sit on a shelf above my empty corpse, Though I never knew she would keep my heart And leave the hole in my chest gaping like a lark, Like a pit where only a fiend would dwell, Whoose every tender feeling he would sell. Now I live as the cursed, Those without souls. I weep and cringe in rancour Lifted by the wings of the night, A spirit without anchor. Now I weep with Thrawn Janet And she remembers flesh and organs, I remember the leap of faith towards love, Screaming with the fallen. She told me clearly, softly of heaven – A golden life in love’s dew, A garden, a gate, a ship of sorts, Like lifting the veil after the last resort. She talked of visions through a lizard’s scale; She talked of heaven when life did fail And my mutilated body left on the surgeon’s table Now dreams, golden dreams in my sanitized crypt
The sun, shone once, is now forgotten, My claws curl like camp fire tales of the night, A wretched cave, a hive, a burrow. I am nothing but a coward in flight. I shriek with the sirens on the poignant reef And tell myself life is underneath, Or roam with the bloody hounds over the heath. A chocolate box with poison sweets, The lover’s feint to touch my cheek. The sun will not shine again today. I take to the air with the skeleton lich. I pour my dreams into the phantom Lethe. The taste of the violent ale she brewed, That drunk and disgusted I now abuse. E. do not let me fall back in my grave As a knave, underrated I will not save, For the beetles will misuse me, The maggots have their way And left in eternal night I’ll shriek as I may. She gave me arms, legs and torso, Mask and maw but did not forgo A life she left out, Just a boy on a lead To dance as a marionette with the Zombie Queen.
I scream on the moor where my bonny E. left me. I like to tell a tale of a million heroes. I peek through the hollows That see into the dark Away from sunbeams wrought And the tears that whet my despair In a good dream, life is left as the only resort.
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May 2017
My nose is numb. Is it still there. My warm breath Cuts through frozen air. Another cold night City winds down. The journey home
UNTITLED BY SHEREE PRATT
Begins in town Streets lit up Red orange green Grinding to a halt Is Man the machine. Returning home To the warmth of fire Some will burn on Only to drop when tired. Sleep will find them While others lie awake Bed is their sanctuary Refuel. Tomorrow’s another day.
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CHOIR, A NATURAL DE-STRESSOR BY CLAIRE KEOGH
A way to beat those uni blues- making friends and having fun I remember when I first discovered La Trobe had a choir, at an O-Week stall. I was stoked – a choir at uni? Really? Yes, really. The La Trobe University Choral Society, affectionately shortened to “LaTUCS” by members. The full name is one heck of a mouthful at times (try saying it three times fast and you’ll see what I mean). LaTUCS, in its current iteration, started seven or so years ago. I’ve been a member since O-Week of last year (2016). When I first heard about it, I was concerned about being able to commit to the evening rehearsals and meeting new people. Would I get along with them? Once I plucked up the courage to go, however, I realised I needn’t have worried. The choir community is a great group of people who look after each other. Plus, it’s so much fun! We have students and nonstudents alike in LaTUCS. Some of us have been around for a few years and others, like me, joined more recently. We welcome everyone – you don’t even have to be able to sing or read music. What’s more important to us is having fun, connecting with people and maybe having a few new experiences along the way. Let me take you through a typical choir evening It’s always such a relief to know that for a couple of hours every Wednesday, we can leave our uni concerns behind us and focus on having a good time instead. The fun starts around 5pm in the Eagle Bar for dinner, where we gather and socialise to unwind from the day. Eagle Bar has “Open Mic” afternoons on Wednesdays from 4-6pm, which provides a great atmosphere. Sometimes choristers even have a go singing in front of the mic themselves, though it’s never compulsory. The time spent at the Eagle Bar is a great way to make new friends and get to know choristers before rehearsal. We talk about lots of different things, from funny to serious stuff. Rehearsal starts at 6:30pm, or thereabouts. We make our way in groups up to the Davidson Room at Glenn College, our rehearsal room. There we form into sections based on our vocal range, Soprano (high), Alto, Tenor and Bass (low). Don’t worry if you have no clue what I’m talking about! Like I said at the beginning, you don’t have to know how to sing in order to join. We help each other out,
with our conductor guiding the way. We rehearse for a couple of hours, with a drinks/toilet break in the middle. At the end of the evening we walk in clumps back to our transportation home, though sometimes we extend the night by going to the Stolberg pub first or “Stollies”, for those who don’t know). Past social evenings have included SingStar ‘competitions’ (where singing is non-compulsory, competition is only as fierce as you want it to be and everyone has a laugh) and pizza nights. Sometimes we use rehearsal time to prepare for a concert, that we then put on for the wider La Trobe community. Last year, we sang in the Agora during Pride Week. The year before that, we joined together with the La Trobe Society of Music (LUSoM) and the La Trobe Pipe Band to perform in September 2015. We’ve also performed in a few other bigger communityorganised works. It’s great fun. LaTUCS is a great way of making friends and not just with other LaTUCS members. See, as well as being our own society, LaTUCS is also part of a national association of university choirs - Australian Intervarsity Choral Societies Association (AICSA). This means we’re connected with about 12 university choirs across the country. It’s a giant network of friends – I’ve made several through it already. Every year this network gathers for a major event, an Intervarsity Choral Festival, for socialising and rehearsing, to perform in a concert. In January 2018 the festival is in Melbourne, with LaTUCS as a host choir. Our conductor is even one of the convenors, and our President and Vice-President are the social secretaries (organisers of the socialising). We’re going to be part of something awesome! Choir is such a fun relaxing space. I’ve made some really strong friendships from participating. It’s a place where we’re free to be ourselves and have fun, maybe even with a little bit of singing thrown in. Whether you’re just looking for a relaxing fun-filled chill space, or to be a part of a big community, LaTUCS has something for you. Come and try us out! If you’re interested, like the LaTUCS page: https://www. facebook.com/LaTUCS/, send an email to latucs@ latrobe.edu.au or come along to a rehearsal. Like I said above, we run every Wednesday night from 6:308:30PM, with time in the Eagle Bar from 5PM. Hope to see you there!
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TRAIN BY MATTHEW SEAN DEVLIN
This morning, on the 7am Vline train to Melbourne, I find myself sitting across the aisle from four teenage girls and I can’t help overhearing their conversation. Their word of the day is ‘disgusting’, but they have dropped the ‘dis’ and replaced it with an ‘ah’. So, as they complain about their boyfriends and argue over eyeliner, I hear the frivolous non-word “ah-gusting” every so often. From my window I can see the city and the buildings Now the train jolts into motion and the tracks screech under the wheel-set. We move slowly at first and, from my window, this creates the illusion that the train is stationary and it’s the scenery that is moving. However, my brain works quickly, without any effort on my part, to rectify this misconception. I have a copy of my favourite book, SlaughterHouse5, which was introduced to me in my first year at La Trobe, but my attention is drawn away from it because the girls are now discussing which of their lives would make the most interesting reality TV show. Megan, who appears to be the leader of the group (or at least the loudest), presents her arguments: “I am in year 8 so I’m older than you, I train horses in my spare time, and I have the hottest boyfriend”.
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Soon the train makes its first stop. A middle-aged couple board and sit in front of me. The woman sits by the window resting her forehead against the glass and the man seems to have fallen asleep instantly. After a few moments the woman turns to ask her husband a question but finds him quietly snoring. She looks at me and mouths a silent laugh. I miss the next few stops because I have my nose between the pages of my book. Billy Pilgrim has just been abducted by the Tralfamadorians and they are taking him back to their home planet. Soon they will explain to Billy their perception of time and just how blind the human race is. are lit up like beacons by the glare of the morning sun. Across the aisle the girls are plugged in from their ears to their phones, as if they’re recharging. One of them rips open the curtains and the sunlight rushes in revealing the specks of dust and skin particles floating on the air. “Is that all dead skin?” she asks. “That’s ah-gusting!” I agree, it is disgusting, but it is also unnervingly intimate. I see a carriage full of strangers slowly inhaling each other. In his essay, The Last Messiah, Zapffe ends with some advice for humanity: “Know yourself – be infertile and let the world be silent after ye.” I have this thought while trying to ignore a mother running down the aisle, chasing after her screaming child. At the end of the carriage, the child realizes he is cornered and his panic intensifies. The other passengers start shifting in their seats uncomfortably and sharing wide-eyed looks of frustration. The mother brings down her open palm and a muffled slap silences the child, only for a moment. “Be infertile and let the world be silent after ye.” After a 2½ hour journey we arrive at the daunting Southern Cross Station. Exiting the train, I’ve never been so grateful to be standing up straight, free of the cold sardine-like existence in that rectangular tin. A curved ceiling hangs high above and a robotic voice-over echoes throughout the enormous area, announcing train times, advice, and warnings. People everywhere, dressed in greys and blacks, are hurrying from one place to another; all so sure of their bearing in the world, or so it seems. I wet my lips and take a breath of the warm recycled air, tasting engines, leather, and sweat. The Shepparton crowd huddle together, filter through the ticket gate one by one, and then scatter in different directions.
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CELEBRATING 50 YEARS OF WORLD-CLASS RESEARCH CREATING A POSITIVE IMPACT ON PEOPLE’S LIVES La Trobe has a proud heritage of groundbreaking research to improve human welfare. A recent example includes our free ASDetect app. It’s designed to help parents identify if their child may be on the autism spectrum, leading to earlier diagnosis and better outcomes. Another exciting development is our Transgender eToolkit that helps families navigate the mandatory court approval process needed to access hormone treatment and create a more positive and efficient experience for their child. La Trobe has the highest possible rating of ‘well above world standard’ in 19 fields of research by Excellence in Research for Australia 2015, which exemplifies our commitment to innovation.
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