LIKEHOME © 2021 by COSTI Immigration Services is licensed under Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International. To view a copy of this license, visit http://creativecommons.org/licenses/bync-sa/4.0/ This paperback edition first published in 2021 Book design and illustrations by Laura Della Scala
Introduction Understanding culture shock What is culture shock? Culture shock stages Culture shock symptoms Dealing with culture shock: some tips
Reflection activities Activity 1 - Self-inspection Activity 2 - Who am I? Activity 3 - My life as an iceberg Activity 4 - Environment analysis Activity 5 - Relationships check-in Activity 6 - My expectActions Activity 7 - Coping strategies
table of contents
Journey Planner
Write and Sketch
Conclusion
There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind. C.S. Lewis
introduction
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Welcome! Do you still remember the instant when you realized it was time to embark on a new and exciting adventure abroad? It doesn’t matter if you have done it for work, study or vacation. You decided to step out of your comfort zone and your daily routine to face new challenges with unpredictable outcomes. You have just arrived in your new country or perhaps you have been living abroad for many years. In both cases, you don’t feel completely adapted to your host country, but you don’t understand why and how to overcome your difficulties. Culture shock affects billions of people who, just like you, decide to challenge themselves and overcome their limits. Although there could be many cultural differences, especially in the beginning, your goal is to adapt to the new environment.
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Purpose of this book The book consists of two main sections, both of which are beneficial in supporting you on your journey. The first part provides valuable information about culture shock that allows you to understand why you experience certain emotions during your stay abroad. The second part of the book guides you in processing those feelings and deeply reflecting on your identity. This section contains helpful self-reflection and self-analysis activities to identify coping strategies to overcome your challenges. This book can be used as a journal, as well as a tool to express your thoughts. Learn! Reflect! Live!
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You have more potential than you think, but you will never know your full potential unless you keep challenging yourself and pushing beyond your own self imposed limits. Roy T. Bennett
Understanding Culture Shock
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Immigration, an ever-present reality The word “immigration” is extremely relevant today. It represents a diverse world, as well as a phenomenon that has always characterized the life of human beings. Described as a permanent or temporary movement of people from their home country to another, immigration affects the entire planet, although the involved countries have changed over the years. What are the difficulties you may have to face on arrival in your new destination, in search of a better life? One of the most common challenges experienced by immigrants and international students is known as culture shock. On the following page, you will learn the meaning and characteristics of this concept.
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What is
Culture Shock?
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A new beginning In 1960, the Canadian anthropologist Kalervo Oberg introduced the concept of “culture shock.” It’s a term used to describe feelings of anxiety, loss, disorientation and conflict that you can experience due to a radical change in a social and cultural environment. You find yourself in new and unfamiliar surroundings where you don’t recognize its rules, and you consequently feel confused. In everyday life, signs such as words, gestures, facial expressions and habits are as much a part of our culture as language. When these signs are lacking, feelings of frustration and anxiety can arise.
Culture shock is a common and inevitable phenomenon. Although you may feel well prepared, it is difficult to predict its severity and form. Every situation is different, as is the way you have to deal with it. 15
Culture shock
Stages
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The U-curve Model According to the U-curve model, firstly introduced by the Norwegian sociologist Sverre Lysgaard, culture shock is divided into four stages: Honeymoon, Crisis, Recovery and Adjustment. On the following page, these four stages are explained in more detail.
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stages Explained in detail
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Not every stage is the same for every person, especially in terms of its duration. You could relate to some and maybe not at all to others. In the illustration below you can find a detailed explanation of each stage, including a summary of the main characteristics and a list of typical feelings and behaviours.
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culture shock
symptoms
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The way you react to culture shock may depend on many factors: previous experience abroad, the differences between the native and host cultures, the level of adaptability, the social support network and finally, mental health. Some people can manage the stress caused by the change and try to integrate into the new environment. Others put themselves on the defensive, refusing to accept diversity, and this generates severe psychological disorders.
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Being aware of all these culture shock symptoms is essential, but not to avoid them, as that is nearly impossible, but to accept and coexist with them. The illustration below shows the most common symptoms.
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Dealing with Culture Shock:
some tips
It doesn’t matter which country you have moved to. Culture shock is a temporary phase and can be overcome over time. Here are some tips you can follow to cope with it:
Try to understand the differences Cultural differences are a source of reflection and dialogue. Try to develop a sense of empathy and tolerance towards what you perceive as “different“ from you and your habits. Also, you could keep a journal, which would be a helpful tool to record experiences and emotions throughout your cultural adaptation journey.
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Give yourself time If you are not fluent in the new language, don’t put yourself down, you will improve with time. There will be things you won’t understand, or mistakes you will make, but all this will help you learn faster. It’s all a matter of time.
Remember that culture shock is normal All travellers at the beginning of their new adventures have to deal with culture shock. It’s a common transition and no one is excluded. Culture shock is part of the experience, and it will make your memories even more exciting.
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Keep an open mind Moving to a new country is an experience of a lifetime. Focus on all the advantages and possibilities you didn’t think you had and see things from a different perspective. Make the most of your opportunities, visit historical sites, learn new languages, and blend in with the locals. Maximize your experience.
Explore and meet locals Whatever you do, don’t isolate yourself. Go out, explore your new country and meet new people. Try to visit a different place every week, even if it is close to where you live. That will help you become familiar with your new environment and meet local people who can teach you about their culture and practice the language. The sooner you can make friends, the sooner you will feel at home.
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Keep in touch with family and friends regularly Living in a foreign country and building new friendships does not imply ignoring your family and friends. Keeping in touch with them regularly will make you feel less lonely and give you peace of mind, knowing that someone will always be waiting for you when you return to your native country.
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A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Lao Tzu
reflection activities
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Welcome to the reflection activities section! Now that you have learned what culture shock is and how it can occur, it’s time to start reflecting. In this section you have the opportunity to answer questions about your identity and your experiences to become more self-conscious. Also, you can create your personalized coping strategies to be used when facing difficult situations.
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Few tips on how to use this section at its best: • No rush. You You don’t don’t have have to to complete complete all all the the exercises exercises in in one one day. day. These activities can evoke all sorts of emotions, so you may want to take some time to reflect. There is no specific order, so feel free to complete them at your own pace. • When are are you you most mostinspired? inspired?In Inthe themorning, morning,as assoon soonasasyou youwake wake up? In up? the In evening, the evening, overover a cup a cup of your of your favourite favourite beverage? beverage? Or perhaps Or per- on your haps usual on your train usual commute? train commute? There is no There right is time, no right there time, is the there right is time the right for you. time for you. • If you feel comfortable, share your answers with people you love and trust. Talking to others is helpful and can make you feel better. Let’s get started!
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SELF-INSPECTION Activity 1 Feelings are important to listen to because they indicate your needs and desires. Moving abroad has certainly shaken you and triggered endless emotions. Look at the list of feelings below and identify those that are most significant for you at this point in your life or are related to your past events and experiences. What do they mean to you?
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Take some time to think about your feelings and then answer the questions on the next page. If you feel something that you can’t find in this list, you can write it inside the illustrated boards.
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HOW DO I FEEL RIGHT NOW?
HOW DO I WANT TO FEEL?
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WHEN AND WHERE DO I FEEL THESE EMOTIONS?
WHAT ARE THE THINGS I CAN DO EACH DAY TO FEEL THE WAY I WANT TO FEEL?
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WHO AM I? Activity 2 This activity helps you to better understand yourself before and after you moved abroad. Do you feel that you have changed? If so, in what exactly? Use the prompts on the right-hand page to reflect on your identity and how it has changed. Then answer the following questions.
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BEFORE I WENT ABROAD I...
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NOW THAT I’M ABROAD, I...
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WHAT HAVE I CHANGED OVER TIME?
HOW AM I THE STILL THE SAME?
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WHAT PART(S) OF MY IDENTITY AM I NOW MORE AWARE OF?
WHAT AM I LEARNING ABOUT MYSELF?
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MY LIFE AS AN ICEBERG Activity 3 Think of an iceberg. You can only see 10% of it while the other 90% is invisible to your eyes. Now imagine that this iceberg symbolizes your life and that people only see a small part of what you are facing during your cultural adaptation phase. What’s in this 10%? Things like learning a new language, adjusting to a different climate, tasting local flavours, discovering the surroundings and meeting new people. All these aspects are easily recognized and are common among those who travel abroad.
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Take a break to think about what people see of your 10% of the iceberg. Feel free to write or draw inside the iceberg.
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So what’s in the remaining 90% of the iceberg below the waterline? There are all those aspects that are invisible to people’s eyes, the ones that challenge you the most and hinder your progress towards a complete cultural adaptation. This part of the iceberg may include conflicting emotions related to a sense of inadequacy, loss of identity, relationship difficulties, and mental health issues such as anxiety.
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Take a break to think about what people don’t see of your 90% of the iceberg. Feel free to write or draw inside the iceberg.
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ENVIRONMENT ANALYSIS Activity 4 This activity aims to make you reflect on the reality you left behind and the one you found once you have reached your new destination. It’s important to balance nostalgia and reality in relation to both your home place and your new environment.
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WHAT I LIKED ABOUT WHEN I WAS AT HOME
WHAT I DISLIKED ABOUT WHEN I WAS AT HOME
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WHAT I LIKE ABOUT WHERE I AM NOW
WHAT I DISLIKE ABOUT WHERE I AM NOW
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WHAT SIMILARITIES DO I SEE BETWEEN WHAT I LIKED ABOUT WHERE I WAS AT HOME AND WHERE I AM NOW?
WHAT SIMILARITIES DO I SEE BETWEEN WHAT I DISLIKED ABOUT WHERE I WAS AT HOME AND WHERE I AM NOW?
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HOW CAN I INTEGRATE WHAT I LIKED ABOUT BEING AT HOME INTO MY LIFE NOW?
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HOW CAN I INTEGRATE WHAT I LIKE ABOUT WHERE I AM NOW ABROAD INTO MY FUTURE PLANS?
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RELATIONSHIPS CHECK-IN Activity 5 Relationships play a fundamental role in every person’s life, especially for those who live abroad. This activity helps you to reflect on your relationships, those that support you during your journey and those that hinder you.
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HOW HAVE MY RELATIONSHIPS CHANGED SINCE I WENT ABROAD?
HOW DO I FEEL ABOUT THAT CHANGE?
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WHICH RELATIONSHIPS CURRENTLY SUSTAIN ME?
WHICH DO I CURRENTLY FIND DRAINING?
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WHAT AM I MISSING FROM MY RELATIONSHIPS?
RELATIONSHIPS I WANT TO PRIORITIZE AND NURTURE
RELATIONSHIPS I AM WILLING TO LET GO
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MY EXPECTACTIONS Activity 6 This activity guides you to analyze the reasons why you decided to go abroad, what you hope to achieve, what you are currently achieving and what you could do to achieve your goals. Each question explores different areas of your life: personal, educational and professional. Also, the ‘other’ field allows you to think about other topics that you may feel are relevant to express.
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WHAT I HOPED TO ACHIEVE ABROAD
PERSONALLY
EDUCATIONALLY / PROFESSIONALLY
OTHER
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WHAT I’M ACHIEVING ABROAD
PERSONALLY
EDUCATIONALLY / PROFESSIONALLY
OTHER
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WHAT I HOPE TO ACHIEVE ABROAD
PERSONALLY
EDUCATIONALLY / PROFESSIONALLY
OTHER
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WHAT I COULD DO TO ACHIEVE WHAT I WANT
PERSONALLY
EDUCATIONALLY / PROFESSIONALLY
OTHER
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PROMISES I MAKE TO MYSELF
The promises you make to yourself are so important because they strengthen your willpower and reveal your desires. What would you like to promise yourself for your future? Write your promises below.
I PROMISE...
I PROMISE...
I PROMISE...
I PROMISE...
I PROMISE...
I PROMISE...
I PROMISE...
I PROMISE...
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COPING STRATEGIES Activity 7 Through this activity, you can reflect on your current coping strategies. You will realize which techniques you are actually applying, which results you are obtaining, and how you can improve your strategies to make them even more effective.
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LIST ALL THE WAYS YOU CURRENTLY COPE WITH CULTURAL ADAPTATION CHALLENGES
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IN WHAT WAYS DO MY CURRENT COPING STRATEGIES HELP ME FEEL THE WAY I WANT TO FEEL?
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IN WHAT WAYS DO MY CURRENT COPING STRATEGIES HINDER MY ABILITY TO FEEL THE WAY I WANT TO?
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Once you have identified both your successful and unsuccessful coping strategies, it’s time to reflect on how you can make them work even more effectively. Fill in the blanks in the exercise below.
WHEN I FEEL
I TEND TO COPE BY
WHEN I DO THIS, IT MAKES ME FEEL
HERE’S HOW I CAN MODIFY THIS COPING STRATEGY
WHEN I FEEL
I TEND TO COPE BY
WHEN I DO THIS, IT MAKES ME FEEL
HERE’S HOW I CAN MODIFY THIS COPING STRATEGY
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This list will help you through difficult times, reminding you that there is always a way to overcome them. Being able to create successful strategies will support you on your way to achieving your objectives.
WHEN I FEEL
I TEND TO COPE BY
WHEN I DO THIS, IT MAKES ME FEEL
HERE’S HOW I CAN MODIFY THIS COPING STRATEGY
WHEN I FEEL
I TEND TO COPE BY
WHEN I DO THIS, IT MAKES ME FEEL
HERE’S HOW I CAN MODIFY THIS COPING STRATEGY
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It is not the destination where you end up but the mishaps and memories you create along the way. Penelope Riley
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Own only what you can always carry with you: known languages, known countries, known people. Let your memory be your travel bag. Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn
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stickers!
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Take the time to put the camera away and gaze in wonder at what’s there in front of you. Erick Widman
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Conclusion Culture shock is a normal transition phase for all those people who move abroad. Living in a foreign country requires a significant cultural adaptation effort and determination. Moreover, stress and suffering could occur since cultural and family ties that help us overcome life’s difficulties are missing. Despite these challenges, human beings are social animals who can adapt anywhere. Once culture shock effects start to wear off, you can truly reflect on how lucky you are to live an experience outside your comfort zone. You finally realize how your journey enriches your inner self and makes you grow up stronger.
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References Adler, P. (1975). The Transitional Experience: an Alternative View of Culture Shock. Journal of Humanistic Psychology, 15, 13 - 23. https:// positivedisintegration.com/Adler1975.pdf Manz Sonja. (2003). Culture Shock - Causes, Consequences and Solutions: The International Experience. https://www.grin.com/document/108360 Hofstede, G. J., Pedersen, P. B., & Hofstede, G. (2002). Exploring Culture: Exercises, Stories and Synthetic Cultures (8/25/02 ed.). Nicholas Brealey. A quote by C.S. Lewis. (n.d.). Goodreads. https://www.goodreads. com/quotes/21690-there-are-far-far-better-things-ahead-than-any-we A quote by Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart. (n.d.). Goodreads. https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/7966934-always-believe-inyourself-and-always-stretch-yourself-beyond-your A Journey of a Thousand Miles Begins with a Single Step - Meaning. (2019, May 25). Literary Devices. https://literarydevices.net/a-journey-of-a-thousand-miles-begins-with-a-single-step/ A quote by Penelope Riley, Travel Absurdities. (n.d.). Goodreads. https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/153089-it-is-not-the-destination-where-you-end-up-but A quote by Aleksandr I. Solzhenitsyn, The Gulag Archipelago 1918– 1956. (n.d.). Goodreads. https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/517715own-only-what-you-can-always-carry-with-you-know Erick Widman Famous quote: “Take the time to put the camera away and gaze in wonder at what’s there in front of you.” (n.d.). Travel Quotes. https://www.treasurequotes.com/quotes/take-thetime-to-put-the-camera-away-and-gaze
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Have you moved abroad and are you feeling lonely, disoriented, or frustrated? Are you experiencing cultural adaptation challenges? What you’re going through is completely normal. It’s culture shock. This book will help you to: • Understand what culture shock is, its stages and symptoms • Reflect on your identity and record experiences while abroad • Identify helpful coping strategies to use when needed during your cultural adaptation process