broke ass beeotches A cheap, easy and friggin’ delicious guide to cooking
Lauren and Miranda Lightholder-Betz
broke ass beeotches
Table of Contents Our Story 4 Shopping Guide 6 Terms 8 Wakey, Wakey 9 LUNCHTIME 15 What’s for Dinner?
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Nibbles 28 Sweet Tooth 33
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Our Story Once upon a time we were young and broke and living in Hawaii. Lauren had just moved out and had not found a job yet. We were struggling to get by on one income. Shopping for good and cheap food was tough. Since we are not really huge fans of instant noodles, we decided to get creative with what was affordable and accessible to us. Our goal is to help you not feel like you have to eat instant noodles everyday just to get by! You ready to have your mind blown on a budget? Much Love,
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Shopping Guide Meats! Chicken Drumsticks Thighs Canned chicken
Beef Ground beef Beef tips
Turkey Ground turkey Sliced turkey
Fish Tuna (canned) Salmon (canned) Tilapia
Pork Ham steak Pork chops
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Easy Eggs Ham and Cheese Scramble What You Need
Now Cook, BEEOtch!
◆ 2 Eggs ◆ 1/4 cup of Shredded Cheese ◆ 2 tsp Butter ◆ 1 Tbsp Milk ◆ 2 slices Deli Ham ◆ 1/2 tsp Salt ◆ 1/2 tsp Pepper ◆ 1/2 tsp Dried Parsley
1. Crack eggs in a bowl. Throw in milk. Throw in spices. Mix that ish together. Tear ham into lil pieces, and throw into to egg mixture. Set aside. 2. Add butter to skillet, and turn that heat to medium. After butter starts melting, pick the skillet up just above the heat and roll that pan around letting the melty goodness coat it. 3. Once skillet is nice and hot, pour egg mix into skillet, stirring as eggs cook. 4. Once eggs are fully cooked, add shredded cheese and melt. 5. As soon as cheese is melted into eggs, remove from heat and get after it!
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Good Gravy Creamed Beef on Toast What You Need
Now Cook, BEEOtch!
◆ 1 can Dried Beef ◆ 1-2 cups Whole Milk ◆ 2 Tbsp White Flour ◆ 2 Tbsp Butter ◆ 1 tsp Paprika ◆ 1 tsp Black pepper ◆ 2-4 Slices of Bread
1. Open can of beef, tear into strips. Set aside. 2. Throw butter in a medium sized pan and turn on heat (low to medium). Once it is 1/4 of the way melted, toss in beef strips, brown a little. Sprinkle in flour. Mix with a fork into a paste. This is called a roux. Fancy, huh? 4. Slowly start pouring in about half of the milk and keep stirring til it thickens. Toss in paprika and black pepper. Keep stirring and add a little more milk. Cover and let simmer for about 5 mins. Look at Insta for a min, stir, check your email for a min, stir... don’t walk away. It might burn. 5. Make toast. Put toast on plate and spoon gravy on top. Like in the picture. Get down on it.
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That’s a Wrap Tuna Lettuce Wraps
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What You Need
Now Cook, BEEOtch!
◆ 2 cans of Tuna ◆ 1 tsp Red Onion ◆ 4 Tbsp Mayo ◆ 1 tsp Soy Sauce ◆ 1 tsp Black Pepper ◆ 1 chopped up Dill Pickle ◆ 2 Tbsp Shredded Cheese ◆ 4 large Lettuce Leaves
1. Combine the tuna, onion, pickle, and shredded cheese in a medium bowl. In a small bowl mix the mayo and soy sauce. 2. Add the mayo mixture to the tuna and mix that ish right on up. 3. Arrange the lettuce leaves on two plates, and fill with tuna. Sprinkle a dash of pepper on top like that on dude with the ponytail.
let’s talk turkey Turkey wrap
What You Need
Now Cook, BEEOtch!
◆ 1 Sun Dried Tomato Tortilla ◆ 1-2 Tbsp Cream Cheese ◆ 1-2 Tbsp of Crumbled Bacon ◆ Salt and Pepper ◆ 5 Slices of Roma Tomato ◆ Iceberg Lettuce Leaves ◆ 2 Thin Slices of Cheese ◆ Thinly Sliced Turkey Breast
1. Layer cream cheese, bacon crumbles, turkey slices, tomato slices, lettuce, and cheese like you’re making a pizza. Sprinkle salt and pepper. 2. Roll it up, cut it in half, get after it.
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Plenty o’Fish Salmon Patties
What You Need
Now Cook, BEEOtch!
◆ 3 6 ounce Cans of Salmon ◆ 1 1/2 cups Butter Crackers ◆ 1 cup mayo ◆ 1/4 cup Bread Crumbs ◆ 1/4 cup Dried Onion ◆ 1 Stalk Celery ◆ E xtra virgin olive oil ◆ 1 tsp Tony Cachere’s Creole Seasoning
1. Drain salmon and set aside. In a large bowl add crushed crackers, minced vegetables, all the spices, mayo and stir til it’s all mixed up. Fold in salmon and bread crumbs. 2. Heat about 4 Tsps of olive oil in a skillet over medium heat, put those lil salmon pancakes in and brown for about 4-5 minutes per side until golden brown. 3. Patties can also be placed under the broiler and cooked for about 8 minutes per side. If you are too busy to cook like a real beeotch.
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Shake-a-Leg Chicken Drumsticks
What You Need
Now Cook, BEEOtch!
◆ 4 1/2 to 5 lbs (1 large pack)
1. In a small bowl, stir together: onion, 2 Tbsp mayo and all the spices
chicken drumsticks ◆ 1 medium Onion, chopped ◆ 2 Tbsp Mayo ◆ 1 tsp Garlic Powder ◆ 1 tsp Black Pepper ◆ 2 Tbsp Seasoning Salt
2. Place chicken drumsticks into a large mixing bowl or soup pot then pour on the marinade and toss to coat. Cover with lid or plastic wrap and refrigerate, go watch a 2 hr movie. 3. When you’re done with the movie, line a rimmed baking sheet with tin foil and bake skin-side-up at 400˚F for 45 minutes then turn drumsticks over (skin-side-down) and bake another 15 minutes. Don’t forget to set a timer on your phone. Chances are you’ll forget they are in there until you smell them burning. Don’t do that.
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