2 minute read
THE LIST
T I P : A F T E R T H E B I R T H , G I V E Y O U R O L D E R C H I L D A G I F T “ F R O M T H E B A B Y ” T O G E T S O M E E X T R A B U Y- I N . M A K E I T A G O O D O N E !
From one to two
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Pregnant? Change is inevitable, but you want the transition to be as easy as possible. Here’s how to prepare your first kid for a new sibling.
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SPILL THE BEANS Share the news with your child as soon as you’re telling everybody else, even if your kid doesn’t completely understand. Otherwise, you risk Aunt Sheila saying something like, “Aren’t you excited about having a new baby brother or sister? ” at the next family Zoom call. The news should come from you.
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READ STORIES ABOUT NEW SIBLINGS Books can help kids understand big life changes before they happen, and you can reference the stories and characters once baby arrives to help your child feel understood. Visiting a family with an older child and a newborn serves the same purpose, but probably isn’t possible during the pandemic. 5
...BUT NOT TOO MUCH Your older kid should be helping because this is what you do in your family: You help each other out. But there’s a danger in the first child becoming “Mommy’s little helper” when they feel the only way to get your attention is by acting more mature than they really are.
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PROTECT BEDTIME The bedtime routine is sacrosanct. If it will have to change—if, say, the pregnant parent has been doing bedtime every night and is unlikely to be able to continue that—then do so before the baby is born.
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DON’T EXAGGERATE WHAT BABIES ARE REALLY LIKE Be careful not to build up the ability of the new baby to be a playmate and to satisfy the needs of the older child. Kids don’t understand that newborns can be pretty boring companions (and yet demanding, too).
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LET THEM HELP... When you’re online shopping for the new babe, allow your child to choose a newborn outfit, and when you’re decorating the nursery, let them help with that, too. Getting kids involved ramps up their excitement and builds buy-in.
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DON’T KICK THEM OUT OF THE CRIB You might want your big kid’s crib for the baby, but if your firstborn still loves their crib, don’t force them into a bed prematurely. Bite the bullet and get a second crib (borrow one or buy one secondhand).
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LISTEN AND VALIDATE Be emotionally available for your older child. Encourage them to express their feelings and thoughts, even if you don’t agree.
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