Travellers: New Changes to OHIP

WE PROTECT YOUR DEPOSITS

ASK Franca

As a professional life coach, Franca Navarra assists people to create immediate and lasting change in any area of their lives. She helps individuals clearly define their vision, goals and dreams, and turns them into tangible results. Our readers asked Franca some of their most pressing questions about life, relationships and careers.

Q: I am a twenty-four-year-old female, and I have been in a relationship with my partner for two years. When I see pictures of my friends having a great time with their boyfriends on social media, I find myself comparing my relationship to theirs, which leads me to question my relationship. Although I am happy for my friends, social media makes me feel jealous, self-pity, and judgmental of my own life. Is social media sabotaging me and my relationship? — Devi from Toronto

A: Welcome to social media, my dear, where people welcome you into their personal life through their happy posts and pics.

I can see why you may feel a little insecure about your own life, especially in terms of your relationship. After all, people only tend to post the picture-perfect moments of their lives.

The reality is social media is not responsible for sabotaging relationships. People sabotage their own relationships with their limiting beliefs, expectations, conditions, and insecurities about themselves, which pour into their relationships.

The greatest thing you can do is to get to the root of what you are lacking within yourself. If seeing your friends happy on a date with their boyfriends leaves you feeling jealous or questioning why you are not experiencing this with your partner, let their posts and pictures inspire you to plan your own date night with your loved one.

It is this simple. No need to hate, celebrate what you have going on in your relationship.

Also, before you peruse your favourite platform, remember the reasons you and your partner fell in love in the first place. This will reignite beautiful memories of what you’ve shared, and it can also spark more of it for your future together.

You see, passion, appreciation, and connection exist when self-love is present. Enjoy your date night.

Q: My husband and I are deeply in love and have two children who add joy to our lives. However, spontaneous sex seems to have gone right out the window. What can we do to bring back the excitement we had before the kiddos were born?

A: Well, the great news is that you are amongst the many couples who have decided to have children. This can be an extremely rewarding experience.

However, as much as you love and adore your children, they really do change everything in your life — including your sexual relationship. Although it may seem difficult right now, it is important to maintain a healthy and passionate sex life.

The key to maintaining a healthy, vibrant, and passionate sex life is planning for spontaneity. When you are planning for spontaneity, you are not planning for sex. You are planning to spend private time together. Planning private time together alleviates the pressure to instantly be in the mood. There are no preconceived notions of what will happen. You are simply creating the time and space for your natural desires, connection, and passion to surface from the love you share for each other.

For example, arrange for the children to have a sleepover with their grandparents or for a friend or sitter to take care of them for a few hours one weekend afternoon. The idea here is that you and your partner know ahead of time there will be some alone time where you can focus on each other. If sex is not on your mind initially, that’s okay. Creating an atmosphere where you can enjoy a quiet dinner, cuddling with each other while watching Netflix, or just holding hands on a walk, encourages many great things to spontaneously happen, and one of them might be sex.

Just be sure to choose a caregiver you fully trust, so you can relax knowing your kids are well taken care of and happy. This requires you to trust and let go. When you are in this state, you can be fully present in the moment, appreciating your time with your husband. Happy planning!

FRANCA NAVARRA is a certified Master Life Coach, Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), International Best Selling Author, Trainer, Motivational Speaker, and Yoga Instructor & Reiki Practitioner.

Send your questions to franca.j.navarra@gmail.com.