YouthESource Unplugged Vol. 9

unplugged, vol. 9

Doing Ministry Getting Guys A Lutheran Understanding of Discipleship Betwixt: Getting Along with Parents & Youth

2 3 7 9

Free Resources Do You Believe in Love?

Game/Plan Night Skit: Don’t Forget Your Umbrella Devotions

& culture

The Youth Worker All Things New Moving Outside the Church Walls The Challenges of Being a Young Adult Church Worker Boundaries: Secrets from DCEs who Thrived

youth

worker

the youth

free

resources

doing

ministry

unplugged , vol. 9

10 12 15 116 2, 10, 11, 25

18 19 20 22

Youth & Culture I’m Straight Marijuana and Faithful Choices Veritas: Looking for Answers

25 26 28 29

How to Stay in Touch with youthESource: For feedback, article ideas, submission guidelines and queries, contact the editor by sending an email to youthESource@gmail.com.

Visit youthESource online at: www.youthESource.com

Mailing Address: The Lutheran Church—Missouri Synod youthESource for Youth Ministry 1333 South Kirkwood Road Saint Louis, MO 63122 Phone: 314.996.1155

Follow youthESource: www.twitter.com/youthESource www.facebook.com/youthESource

The youthESource exists to provide Jesuscentered resources for those at work with youth in the Lutheran congregation and beyond. New resources, articles and blog posts are added to the website every week.

The Youth Ministry Office is: Rev. Dr. Terry K. Dittmer, Director Rev. Mark Kiessling, Associate Director – Gathering Program Jim Lohman, DCE, Associate Director – Servant Events/Gathering Arrangements Krista Miller, Associate Director – Gathering Registrar/Operations Amy Gray, Media and Publications Project Coordinator

Rev. Steven Cholak, Special Ministries Project Coordinator Renee Lorenz, Administrative Assistant Contracted Resource Personnel: Sherrah Behrens, youthESource Editor Jessica Bordeleau, LYF and Young Adult Ministry Consultant

youthESource unPlugged is published annually by the Office of National Mission, Youth Ministry of The Lutheran Church— Missouri Synod. © 2014 The Office of National Mission, Youth Ministry of The Lutheran Church—Missouri Synod

ministry

doing

Doing Ministry Doing Ministry is all about the work of Youth Ministry, whether it’s your job or your act of service. From practical tips to theoretical ponderings, if you do Youth Ministry, this should be your first stop for advice, ideas and tips.

In this section of the website, you’ll find the following categories: Apologetics Book Reviews Family Ministry Intergenerational Ministry LCMS Youth Gathering Media & Technology Communicating with Youth, Social Media

Middle School Ministry Betwixt: Middle School Ministry Blog, Confirmation Ministry Teams & Volunteers Volunteer Recruitment Outreach Servant Events Spiritual Development Accountability, Discipleship, Meditation, Prayer, Servanthood, Spiritual Disciplines, Stewardship, Worship Student Leadership Teaching Tips Theology

Urban Ministry Young Adults Youth Ministry Stories Youth Ministry Theory Assessment, Challenges/Joys of Youth Ministry, Community Building, Diversity, Fundraising, Game Theory, Girls, Goals, Guys, How To, Parents, Programming, Relationships, Risk Management, Traveling with Youth, What Is Youth Ministry, Youth Ministry Basics Blog

Devotion: How Long Shall I Put Up with You?

by Lisa Hellyer, DCE

seems to come on the heels of some doesn’t give in to the emotion for incredible spiritual mountaintops. As long, but instead moves to action as a fellow youth worker, I bet you are He heals the boy and then teaches nodding your head in complete un- the disciples about the power of derstanding. The thing that’s hard faith in Jesus. about discouragement is feeling Discouragement can sometimes all alone in it. But we are not alone. come with the territory, but Jesus It’s probably why I love the story of calls us to action. Discouragement Jesus and the disciples immediately becomes a teachable moment— following their time on the Mount of an opportunity to discuss with your Transfiguration. students the grace of God in your Matthew records the event for us life and theirs, and the power of in chapter 17 where the disciples faith in Jesus. With Him nothing is imwho remained behind were trying possible! without much success to heal a Reflect: man’s son of demon possession.

• What in your life might be caus“I brought him to your disciples, but ing Jesus to say, “How long shall I they could not heal him.” put up with you?”

“You unbelieving and perverse • Where in God’s Word can you generation,” Jesus replied, “how find encouragement to battle long shall I stay with you? How long the times when you are experishall I put up with you? Bring the encing discouragement?

Text: Matthew 17:14-20 One of the things I struggle with boy here to me.” Jesus rebuked Prayer: Heavenly Father, thank You for sometimes in ministry is discourage- the demon, and it came out of the ment. I’ve worked with teenagers boy, and he was healed at that mo- Your boundless gift of grace in our lives. In times of discouragement, throughout my 27 years of being ment.

My sense in Jesus’ tone was that Lord thwart the plans of Satan, and in full-time church work, and they have given me countless belly He was discouraged. We are not encourage us by Your Word and laughs, more than a few really great alone in this feeling. Being in min- Your presence in our lives. In Jesus’ memories and lots of discourage- istry means experiencing times of Name. Amen. published online June 2014 ment! And that discouragement discouragement. I love how Jesus 2| www.youthESource.com

“More violence.” help to attract and develop young That was my 16-year-old son’s re- men into disciples of Jesus? Below sponse to my question, “What would is a starter list to help think through bring more guys to church?” your programs, activities and wor“There should be girls, but not girly ship for its appeal to guys: stuff. You have to have action and 1- It’s gotta be dangerous… competition. We want to blow stuff Not the kind of danger that my up, shoot things and have fun. No brother used to love when he’d boring people, slow stuff or old-peo- hand me something with a lit fuse ple music that doesn’t relate. We and say, “Here, hold this and let’s should be able to get to know each see what happens…” other and hang out without all the It’s Jesus’ kind of danger. It’s danrules.” ger that teaches, dragging guys In thousands of years of non-evolu- through a storm at sea (Mt. 8:23-27). tion, it’s clear to see the male species It’s danger that tests, allowing guys is a great argument for creationism. to fail and showing them where their Not much has changed since Cain true strength lies (Mt. 26:69-75). Finaltalked his brother into going out into ly, it’s a dangerous call to a dangerthe field for some “guy time.” ous adventure, where guys are sumUnfortunately, many churches moned to die to themselves, pick up have tried to stifle the wilder side of a cross and follow a crucified Savior young men, and the result is a di- unswervingly (Mt. 16:24-26). minishing number of guys who are 2- It’s gotta be fun… active in the Kingdom. Rather than Hanging out with Jesus had to be a stifle what is part of the male make- kick. Yes, He suffered and died, and up, we are better off to channel it. yes, He was locked in a mortal strugWhat’s often missed in the Gospels gle with the devil, the world and the is that Jesus targeted guys and dis- Pharisees. But He also ministered in cipled them in ways they could re- ways that would create wonder and late to as men. Instead of trying to joy. (Joy is the theologically acceptget men to behave, He taught the ed word for fun.) In Matthew 17:24Twelve and modeled what a godly 27, Jesus has Peter pay a temple tax wild man looks like and lives like. to not give offense. How does He So what elements in youth ministry come up with the money? By hav-

thESource unplugged | 2014 | 3

ministry

by Rev. Jay Reed

doing

Getting Guys

ing Peter cast a hook in the sea and take the money out of the first fish’s mouth that he catches. Sure, there’s some good theological stuff in there, but focus on the method for a minute. Can you imagine Peter talking to John—”Yo, dude, you are never gonna believe what happened today…”

Adding the element of fun engages young men in the wonder and joy of the Gospel and gives them stories to share.

3- It’s gotta challenge…

Nothing bores young men quicker than predictability. Nothing loses young men quicker than things they can’t relate to. All too often ministries major in predictable truths in a language and culture not intelligible to young males. The challenge is to take timeless truths of the faith and present them in ways that keep guys off balance and challenge them.

After a killer day of ministering to a lot of needy people, Jesus tells His disciples to come away with Him and get some rest (Mk. 6:31).

What happens next is the ultimate bait and switch as they get to the rest stop and thousands of people are there waiting for them. Jesus, of course, full of compassion, preaches and teaches until it’s late. When the disciples have had enough, they suggest that Jesus send the crowds away to buy themselves something to eat. For our purposes, the highpoint of this story is verse 37, “YOU give them something to eat”—a huge challenge, which they immediately protest. But then He shows them how, by God’s provision, they could give the crowds something to eat. Suddenly they are part of God’s provision, being the hands that distributed the food.

Young men need to be challenged to see that Jesus Christ is the focus and power of the Kingdom among us today, and He uses their hands and lives to help bring it into the world around them.

4- It’s gotta promise greatness…

There’s a false notion in some circles that striving for greatness is unbiblical and should be discouraged.

This is a huge problem when you have little boys raised on super he-

ministry

doing

roes, white knights and zombie killers. Whether it’s via athletics, video games, academics, on the streets or a dozen other ways, guys want to be great.

The disciples were no different in their little spiritual arms race debate in Mark 9:33-37. In response, Jesus did not tell them to abandon their desire to be great. He instead redefined greatness as the One who is last and servant of all.

Every guy has a natural desire to be a hero. Our challenge is to help them see and work toward becoming great in the eyes of God first.

5- It’s gotta be about becoming “bros”…

The great hero stories always include “bros,” characters who are somehow instrumental in helping and can model, guide and coach the hero succeed. Lone Ranger had along the way.

Paul refers to this when he says, Tonto. Batman had Robin. Moses “Be imitators of me as I am of Christ” had Joshua. David had Jonathan.

Guys need a band of brothers to (1Cor. 11:1). It’s cliché by now but still share good times and have each true: following Jesus is more caught others’ backs in the times of battle. than taught. Our goal in mentoring They relate way differently in rela- is showing them the practice of a livtionships than girls do, but have the ing faith. It’s showing them how to same desire for deep bonds with rely on grace and forgiveness and other guys that are forged in life ex- the love of Christ in everyday situations. It’s allowing the Holy Spirit to periences.

Jesus had “rings” of disciples: the use our lives as a witness to His mer72 (Lk. 10), the 12 (Mk. 3:14) and the cy and power. God does the work 3 (Mt. 17:1). Although He had indi- as we allow Him to use us. Our whole vidual conversations with various life points to Christ.

Some mentors are, “I’ve been ones, when it came to life and ministry it is always reflected in commu- there done that,” types. They tend nity with one another. A major focus to reach back and help guys up the of Jesus’ prayer in John 17 is that ladder of life one rung at a time.

Other mentors are, “I’ll help you “they may become perfectly one, so that the world may know that get there,” types. They tend to enyou sent me…”(v. 23). God’s Spirit, courage and provide support and working through His Word, will draw direction from below.

Whatever the style, mentors say, “I guys to Jesus Christ. Our challenge is to help them see and experience believe in you as God’s own and in what it means to be teammates in what He is doing in your life. You are not alone. I will walk with you as you the body of Christ.

6- It’s gotta be about following Jesus… learn to follow Him.” Of all the starters listed above, This might be the most important one of all. Guys learn best by mim- having a mentor—someone to help icking what they see. Girls seem to process life and faith and the how have some sort of spiritual advan- to’s—is by far the most significant tage—kind of like breast-feeding— way to help guys grow as disciples they just seem to know what to do of Jesus.

Some reflection questions to help when the situation presents itself.

Not so with guys. Guys need men- you apply these to ministry to guys: 1-As we consider our church’s mintors, other men (and women) who have walked the way before them istry to young men, is it dangerous?

4| www.youthESource.com

What dangerous elements could we add to Bible study, worship and our other activities so that God’s Spirit might use His Word to teach, test and call young men to a deeper relationship with Christ?

2- How’s our “fun quotient”? What elements of fun can we add to Bible study, worship, servant events, etc.?

3- Are we challenging the young men in our ministry? What are some ways we could significantly and relevantly challenge them through our youth ministry?

4- How can we help guys see what greatness looks like in God’s eyes?

What opportunities could we create for them to try out becoming the least and a servant of all?

5- Do we have an environment that helps guys grow deep in relationships with other guys?

6- How can we be more effective at mentoring guys? Is there another church that is doing this well that we could learn from? Who are some adults who might be able to start mentoring?

A couple of books worth reading with some good practical ideas on the “how to’s” that are geared more for men, but have good application for younger guys too are Why Men Hate Going To Church by David Morrow and Wild at Heart by John Eldridge.

A good movie to see a secular example of how a woman mentors a group of young men is October Sky.

ministry

thESource unplugged | 2014 | 5

doing

4- Share the ownership. Get guys ChallengingSo how do we go from theory to 1- Greet & meet challenge- Tell practice? How do we implement involved as quickly as possible in the these qualities in our own unique process. They’ll be great champions your group they need to greet and for ideas they own. See yourself as meet three people they don’t know church/ministry setting?

1- Be unique. Each ministry is coach, cheerleader, mentor and and find out one interesting fact about each one. Give them little unique. God has blessed you and “process steerer” more than leader. pieces of paper to write down the your ministry with exactly what you Ideas: Some of these might not work in names of the people they meet and need as far as people and resources to accomplish what He wants. What your context or situation. Some might the facts. Encourage them to do this this means is, don’t spend too much not be bold enough. Some you can a few weeks in a row or maybe the time looking around at what other implement right away, others will same week once a month.

2 - Sermon application challengegroups are doing. Spend more time take some preparation and deeplooking to Him in prayer. He will show er planning. They’re meant to give Challenge your guys to take sermon you both direction and resources. you an idea of “what could be,” so notes and think of how the Word tweak appropriately to make them they hear on Sunday can apply to Be patient, pray deeply. their lives during the week. Provide 2- Get a team. Kids, adults, a sym- fit your ministry situation.

Also, keep the ladies in mind as the sermon notes sheets with a few pathetic dog—whoever you can find to help you pray and consider you come up with ideas to make starter questions and an applicahow to implement guy things into sure they’re not totally excluded. tion challenge at the bottom, such your ministry. Obviously you want to Generally, if your ministry is interest- as, “One thing from today’s worship grab a few guys for their input. But ing to guys, it will be to girls as well. I feel the Holy Spirit is saying to me this can sometimes be a frustrating But make sure you ask the “How will right now is…” process, because most guys are this fly with the girls?” question from Appeal to Greatness1- Great service- Get guys to comnot thinking along those lines. If you time to time in your planning. mit to serve before, during or after can get a few men, great—they’re Ideas to make worship… service in an appropriate capacjust bigger boys. Use the reflection Dangerous1- Foreign worship- Take your ity. A lot of churches leave this to questions from part one to do some group to worship at churches of dif- the adults, but offer a “youth month brainstorming.

3- Short term commitment. Ask ferent cultures. If you’re pretty much of service” or ask the older folks to your team to commit for a week- an all-white church, go to an all- mentor some of the youth as readend retreat, three meetings, twice black service. Let your group expe- ers, ushers, greeters and the like.

2- Great movements- Have your a month for two months or whatev- rience how Hispanic Catholics see er you think will get the ball rolling, God, how first generation Asians wor- team design a movement plan. This but give a definite end time. If it’s a ship in their native language or what is simply looking over who’s involved good team and you work well to- worship in an urban mega church or in your group and asking, “What opportunities are there for this guy to gether, you can agree to continue small country church looks like.

2- Blind worship- Blindfold the guys move forward in worship participameeting when you reach the end of and assign someone to guide them tion and how can we encourage your original commitment. for the Sunday morning experience. him?” The goal is to make sure you Debrief them afterwards and ask have opportunities and appropriate them what they noticed differently invitations for non-attenders to atabout worship. Ask the guides what tend regularly, for regular attenders it was like to watch over someone to become participators, for particiand help them with the experience. pators to become leaders.

Build BrotherhoodFun1- Check in prayer- Have guys 1- Sermon cartoon strip- During the sermon, have your guys draw the meet for five minutes before or afsermon as a cartoon strip. It can be ter worship to check in and pray for simple or elaborate, but no words. each other on a weekly basis. This Afterwards have them share their encourages them to be regular in creations, highlighting the major worship and keeps them connected in a simple but significant way. points of the sermon.

2- Tag team message- Work with 2- Surprise the worship team- Bring refreshments for the worship team. three guys and the pastor to deliver Grab coffee or treats for the pastor, a “tag team” message. Ask the pasmusic people and anyone else who tor to design it so that each guy presusually shows up early to set up for ents a brief portion of the message.

This is a great hands-on opportunity church.

ministry

doing

for the pastor to share how he goes about preparing a message.

Ideas to make Bible study…

Dangerous 1- Go on-site. If the passage is about the disciples catching fish, hook up with a local fisherman and hit the beach. If it’s about Satan tempting Jesus at the top of the world, take a hike to the highest point around. Retell the manger story in an old barn with real smells and real animals. You get the idea.

2- Deep sharing and application questions- Sometimes dangerous is simply allowing yourself to be vulnerable. Guys want to share their deep thoughts and feelings, too. Don’t be afraid to include deeper questions like, “What sin is weighing you down right now?” or “What destructive habit do you feel God leading you to address in your life this week?”

The Gospel says that no matter how bad the sin, how deep the pain, how destructive the behavior, Jesus Christ has given, is giving and will ultimately give us total victory through His life, death and resurrection. Allowing guys to bring their shortcomings, failure, hurts and fears in the context of God’s Word helps them to understand and appreciate the Gospel that much more.

Fun1- Tag team- Have three or four guys present the Bible story or lesson as a team, each guy getting to speak for only 10 seconds. They get to read the passage and have one minute to figure out who says what, then they’re on. The point isn’t to get it perfectly straight but to get them to process and then share under pressure.

2- Sculpture Messages- Give each person random art objects. As you walk through the study, have them create an art piece that represents the point of the study. They can either create individual pieces or work together in small groups or one large group.

Challenging1- Life Issues- Do a “Challenging Life Issues” study and go right after the topics we are most uncomfortable talking about. Include guys in picking the topics and figuring out 6| www.youthESource.com

how God’s Word applies in each week for six to nine months. Ask topic. Get your students to do the them to read Scripture each week research and help design the dis- and come prepared to discuss it.

The core of your time will be in each cussion format.

2- True or False?- Present a number person answering three questions: of sayings our society and culture “What do you think God is saying to accepts and challenge guys to spot you in this passage?” “How do you the untruth and explain why. See if think God is leading you to respond they can come up with ones they to what you have read?” “How can hear a lot at school or among peers, we pray for you?”

Want some more ideas in the area then challenge them to research of activities, serving, outreach and Scripture for doctrinal guidance. missions? Do you have something Appeal to Greatness1- Great teaching opportunities- you’ve done that someone else Ahead of the Bible study time, ask would benefit from? Share them one of the guys to read the passage in the comments of the online verand explain it in his own words dur- sion of this article to help us all in our ing the study. Before anyone opens common challenge of getting guys their Bible, ask the guy to share and to come and follow Jesus.

Find more ideas on getting answer any questions anyone has.

If he forgets something, or is wrong guys at http://2014.youthesource. about something, invite someone org/2013/09/05/getting-guys-part-2from the group to share. Thank him from-theory-to-practice/ published online September 2013 for his willingness to risk, then have the group open their Bibles and Pastor Jay Reed serves at Light of the look over the passage together. This Valley Lutheran Church in Elk Grove, CA. works best with Bible stories and nar- When asked about his passion for youth ratives. and youth ministry, Pastor Reed shares, 2- Celebrate greatness- Set up a “To see kids connected to Christ Monday system of recognizing and reward- through Saturday as well as Sunday. See ing Biblical greatness. Young men them living, breathing and walking in Him are already surrounded by the race every moment.” for greatness in the eyes of the world and usually the recognition and rewards are apparent. What about God’s view of greatness? Did someone serve in a great way, show great faith, love in a great way? What’s an appropriate way to celebrate that with your young men?

Build Brotherhood1- Bulls in the ring- In football, we’d make a circle and stick one guy in the middle. The coach would call out a number and that guy would run full speed and hit the guy in the middle, trying to knock him down.

This version is more spiritual than physical. At the end of Bible study, pick two or three guys to face the group. Everyone else can ask any question about the study, the Bible passage or how it should apply to life and the guys need to come up with an acceptable answer. If they don’t, they stay in the middle. If they do, pick another team.

2- Discipleship triads- Meet with three guys for Bible study once a

doing ministry

A Lutheran Understanding of Discipleship

by Dr. Dave Rueter, DCE

I recently got a new pair of glasses for the first time in quite a while.

Wisely, I took my wife to get her input on just what kind of glasses to get for myself. Getting her input avoided what might have been inevitable concerns caused by my own poor selection process.

In some respects, the current popular discussion of discipleship might fit into a similar category. As Christians, we are all disciples and therefore seem to have some basis by which to claim some knowledge about what being a disciple is all about. And yet, like my need to have my prescription checked, we would be advised at times to consult our theology as Lutherans in assessing the popular presentation of discipleship today. The theological lenses with which we view discipleship can have a radical impact on how we come to understand what it means to be a disciple and can,

in turn, reshape our practice of our respond to God’s working of faith in our lives with the development of theology.

There seems to be a false assump- holy living of our own. Yet, this is not tion that has been imported, at what is taking place. Mueller points least partially, across theological out that in sanctification, “we can traditions that has impacted how speak of a working with the Holy discipleship is often understood in Spirit… Because of the gift of faith, Lutheran circles. While we tend to we want to work with the Holy Spirit. get our understanding of justifica- Yet, even this cooperation is a prodtion down correctly, there seems to uct of God’s activities (Philippians be a misapplication of sanctifica- 2:13) and not something we can do tion that can radically reshape our by our own innate human power.”1 approach to discipleship. We know The tendency to make our diswith some clarity that we are justified cipleship out to be a work in which entirely by Christ. Being truly dead in we find a greater degree of persin, we recognize that we lack the sonal responsibility is rather natural. very capacity to respond, even in The very reality of God’s complete the slightest. role in our justification pushes back However, at times we seem to against our human desire to take assume that since God has taken charge and work out our salvation care of our justification, we now are ourselves. Thus the idea that we responsible for our sanctification. If would take a back seat to the work this were indeed the case, disciple- of the Holy Spirit in our sanctification ship would be all about us. Disciple- can, at times, seem to be too much. ship would be about our striving to We would much rather have the thESource unplugged | 2014 | 7

ministry

doing

aid of the Holy Spirit—truly no mainstream theological tradition would dispute that active role of the Spirit in discipleship—rather than have the Holy Spirit work out our sanctification within us. “(Discipleship) is not primarily about following a set of rules, engaging in ascetical practices or affirming certain doctrines.”2 Note that there is a place for faith practices in discipleship; they simply are not to have the central feature as though they are themselves a means to an end.

Here is where I think the real wrestling over discipleship takes place.

We desire to take an active role in our discipleship, or at least most discussions about discipleship tend to emphasize some form of activity, yet if the Holy Spirit is the prime mover in our formation as a disciple, what then is our properly understood role?

Is there a place for discipleship training or spiritual disciplines?

I would argue that yes there is indeed a place for each, but that they must be understood within a larger framework of our sanctification by the Holy Spirit. As disciples of Christ, we are not entirely passive receptors of the shaping formation of sanctification. Neither are we responsible to reshape ourselves by our own strength. Rather a middle approach is called for. It is by the power of the Holy Spirit that we are enabled to engage in discipleship training. (By discipleship training, I am referring to the more cognitive aspects of discipleship: Bible study, worship and one-on-one work with a discipleship mentor). It is also by the power of the Holy Spirit that we are able to adopt spiritual discipline practices in a manner that is truly beneficial.

Let me offer some examples of how spiritual disciplines can be misapplied. Fasting, which is a very scriptural practice, can be made into a practice that is seen as a “work” by which we exercise faith ourselves and thus we try to apply our own strength to grow our faith, rather than seeking the sustaining power of Christ through a fast. Further we may be led by some approaches to discipleship to make use of a “verse 8| www.youthESource.com

of the day” approach to reading we teach the Christian faith to a Scripture, which disconnects par- new disciple, or an old disciple for ticular verses from the flow of the that matter, we “disciple” them larger passage, and runs the real through the Word of God. Again risk of distortion. Thus two dangers the prime mover is the Lord as the are seen—one in which we see dis- author of the Word, but we particicipleship as our work and the other pate by presenting the Word in our in which practices become slaves teaching.

Thus discipleship is a core eleto our overly busy lives rather than ment of youth ministry specifically deep reflections upon the Word.

Rather than operating under the and Christian education generally. assumption that spiritual disciplines When we teach in formal and inforwork out our spiritual growth like mal settings, as we present learning weight lifting works out our muscles, in youth group, in small groups and we instead apply appropriate grace one-on-one mentoring, we particito our practice of spiritual disciplines, pate in the discipleship of our youth. allowing the Holy Spirit to take the At times we will disciple through catlead. This is truly freeing. We have all echesis as we teach the central elehad times in which we have strug- ments of the Christian faith. At times gled. We have all meant to take up we will disciple through spiritual dia particular spiritual discipline only to rection as we discuss the applicahave our best intentions met head tion of Scripture in our lives. At times on with the old Adam within. Rather we will disciple through spiritual discithan viewing this struggle under the plines as we read the Bible and pray Law, if we continually return to the together. At all times we will disciple Gospel, offering forgiveness even to the youth in our churches through ourselves, we are freed to rely upon the power of Christ and by the guidthe Holy Spirit rather than our own ance of the Holy Spirit.

What a joy it is to journey with our strength in our discipleship.

So what, in the end, is discipleship students through life! What a priviin Lutheranism? Discipleship is sim- lege it is to see the Holy Spirit at work ply our life as disciples, empowered in their lives as they grow and maby the Holy Spirit. Discipleship is not ture, while they wrestle and struggle some new application of the Law with the impact of their faith on their in the life of the believer. All believ- lives and their lives on their faith. I ers are disciples and thus are all in thank God for each of you who take a state of discipleship. Discipleship your part in this noble task.

1 is not a special spiritual activity that Mueller, S. P. (2005).Called to bewe are responsible for. Rather, dis- lieve, teach, and confess. (p. 299). cipleship is the sanctifying work of Eugene, OR: Wipf & Stock.

2 God Himself in our lives. Discipleship Peace, R. V. (2011). Discipleship. is God calling us deeper and deep- In G. G. Scorgie (Ed.),Dictionary of er into relationship with Him and Christian Spirituality (p. 406). Grand with our fellow disciples. Discipleship Rapids, MI: Zondervan. is both the successes empowered published online November 2013 by the Holy Spirit and the failures Dr. Dave Rueter has served as a Director caused by sinful natures. Disciple- of Christian Education in congregations in ship is our life in Christ. Discipleship is California and Texas. Dave currently serves the Body of Christ in action. as both the Youth & Family Facilitator for This brings me to my final point: the Pacific Southwest District as well as the what does the Body of Christ in ac- Director of the DCE Program at Concordia tion look like relative to this under- University, Irvine. He is married to his beautistanding of discipleship? We are ful bride Andrea and is dad to James and instructed by Christ to “make dis- Wesley. He enjoys serving the church as a ciples” (Matt. 28:19). How is it then volunteer, teaching adult Bibles studies on that we “make” these disciples? If Sundays and hanging out with the high the Holy Spirit makes a disciple origi- school youth on Wednesday nights at his nally through Baptism, then our role church in Anaheim. comes in through teaching. When

doing ministry

Betwixt: Getting Along with Parents and Youth

by Cassie Moore, DCE

It’s the conundrum every youth worker faces: the eternal balance between handling adults and teenagers.

It’s an odd balance, and one that we all struggle with—whether we’re newbies or old pros, male or female, or even paid staff or volunteer. On one hand, your job requires you to wear goofy outfits, sing karaoke and be familiar with hit pop songs so you can reach your students—and on the other side of the spectrum, you’re responsible for the safety and welfare (and usually the budget) of your youth. No matter where you are or what size church you may be at, you’re inevitably dealing with both youth and their parents or guardians at the same time.

So how on earth can you get along with both parents and youth?

Here’s a list of some of my personal “do’s and don’ts” to help you navigate this tricky topic: 1) Don’t use words like “groovy,” “awesome” and “totally” too often in adult conversation.

I know it can be tempting to speak like a 14-year-old since you spend so much time with them, but please remember…you are an adult. Sure, wear your trendy shirts and flip-flops and listen to your teenybopper

music—there’s nothing wrong with striving to make teenagers feel like you’re not a stuffy adult that they can’t relate to.

When you’re dealing with other adults, however, remember that you’re one of them. As much time as you may spend with teens, it’s still important to maintain a professional and responsible demeanor with parents. After all, they’re entrusting their children—and their kids’ faith educations—to you. Don’t make them doubt that by your careless jargon.

2) Don’t ever say the phrase, “Don’t tell your parents this!”

I don’t think I need to elaborate much on this. Rest assured, it’s the guaranteed way to make sure that every kid tells his or her parent about it. And that every parent will be irritated with you, as a youth leader.

3) Do remember to equip adults and teens.

Sometimes we lose sight of the fact that we’re working with entire families, not just teenagers. After all, you may feel like you spend a lot of time with your students—but parents and guardians spend vastly more time with their kids! It’s important for us, as youth leaders, to remember that we have a responsibility to equip parents just as equally as teenagers.

I’ve striven to provide parents with regular communication—so that they know what topics we’re talking about—but also with recommended resources, so they can have an active part in their children’s faith lives.

I’ve given out lists of recommended books, websites, shows and pod casts often so that parents can be learning right alongside their kids.

I’ve hosted meetings and training sessions to help parents understand and deal with their teens, and I’ve always tried to involve parents often so that they get the opportunity to partner with our ministries.

4) Don’t share personal stories or divulge confidences about their teens.

A big no-no in dealing with parents and teens occurs when you, as a trusted youth leader, flap your jaw about a student’s personal life without their permission. Even things that may seem minor to you—for instance, sharing a child’s crush with a parent without their permission— could cause a major rift in your relationship with your youth. It’s better to remain a caring, but trustworthy, adult that all your students can confide in—instead of one they think will blab to everyone. thESource unplugged | 2014 | 9

ministry

doing

Of course, if a student’s health, lipped boys hadn’t bothered to tell emotional stability or some other se- them about. rious problem comes to your knowl- 6) Do have a transparent ministry.

In my opinion, one of the unhealthiedge, you need to take proper steps to report or deal with the issue. est habits a youth leader can fall into Sometimes that requires connecting is having an “us vs. them” mindset with parents or other family, Child within his or her youth group. You’ve Protective Services and other staff at probably seen it, as I have—a youth your church or school. Problems like leader who has pitted teenagers this might include self-harm, abuse, against everyone else and created neglect or depression. Always seek an exclusive little “club” that seems counsel from other professionals in to be against everyone else in the cases like these, and always err on church and community.

Sometimes this can be as simple the side of protecting children.

5) Do keep parents involved through as a group of teens who only ever sit with each other in the back of regular communication.

I’ve always found that parents the sanctuary, or it could be a youth were much more supportive and in- group that never supports any other vested in our youth programs when events or functions because they I actively involved them. I’ve tried “do their own thing.”

Whatever habits a group might to send emails, newsletters and text messages, and connected with par- have, it’s important for leaders to ents face-to-face when they come strive for a transparent ministry—one in which events are open and invitto pick their kids up.

What we sometimes forget, as ing, leaders are forthright and comyouth leaders, is that kids might municate well, information is shared open up to us but not necessarily to frequently and people are welcomtheir parents at home. A few years ing of strangers. The last thing you ago, I had an incredible experience want is a closed-off group that sends of witnessing five middle school boys messages of hostility and exclusivity, share their faith with each other in and indicates that you’re against ways that brought me unparalleled families and friends.

7) Don’t try to explain inside jokes to joy, as their youth leader.

When I arrived home from that parents.

Rest assured, no matter how experience, I realized that these boys’ parents likely didn’t know how tempting it may be to try to explain proud I was of them, and what they to parents what goofy jokes were said on this trip. I sent an email to told in the back of the bus on the the group of parents, very generi- way home from your retreat, it’ll cally describing the experience but never make sense to them. Just spending time detailing what I had keep calling Tommy the “Poky Pickappreciated about each student’s le” and don’t bother trying to ansharing. Every single parent emailed swer his parents’ questioning looks. me back, telling me that they had Rather, cast the bait and let Tommy been in tears reading about their himself do the explaining to his folks. son’s experience—and thanking me 8) Do look for ways to creatively inprofusely for sharing what their tight- clude parents in your program.

10| www.youthESource.com

I’ve truly enjoyed involving parents and families in our ministry in many creative ways. I’ve had parents host prayer sessions while we’ve been away on trips, done live blogs and Twitter feeds of events and mission experiences and had parents host banquets and receptions for our youth—all with great benefit to our program.

Sometimes we’re tapped out of ideas, and it’s perfectly acceptable to let parents come in and think creatively about ways to be involved in ministry. Just discourage anything that has to do with “Messy Twister” and bottles of ketchup and chocolate syrup…trust me on this.

You’ve reviewed my personal list; now it’s time for you to do some reflecting of your own. How can you, in your ministry or volunteering, make a sincere attempt to balance both parents and teenagers?

Now that you’ve got your thinking cap on….get ready, get set….and balance! published online December 2013 Read more from the Betwixt: Middle School Ministry blog at www.youthesource. com.

Cassie Moore is a writer, speaker and Christian educator living in St. Petersburg, Florida. She grew up in Illinois and Minnesota, earned her degree from Concordia University in Irvine, California, and has served students in six states over the last decade. She is passionate about relational, Christ-centered ministry and outreach, and enjoys observing culture, exploring new places, painting, writing, reading, speaking professionally and talking to strangers. She lives with her husband Tyler, a pastor, and two Australian Shepherd puppies. Read more of her writing at her blog at zealousglow.wordpress.com.

free

Bible studies, skits, devotions, parent tips, and more…all resources you need to do Youth Ministry. So, what free resources do we offer?

Activities & Games Apologia Talks Evaluation of relevant doctrinal issues with Scriptural and doctrinal connects, all in bite-sized, easy to understand segments.

Bible Studies Written for use in congregational youth settings, but can be adapted for other settings.

Book Talks Reviews and discussion guides on popular books for teens.

Devotions Enhance your own devotional life, or use them with your youth.

Fundraisers Ideas Advent, Back to School, Christmas, Easter, Lent, Summer, Servin’ Lovin’ Praisin’ Blog, Thanksgiving Parent Tips Resource Kits Collections of resources related to a specific topic.

Retreats Retreats come complete with Bible study ideas, devotions, activities and more.

Skits and Dramas Find skits and dramas for use in worship, youth group, family event settings and more.

Word One Lectionary Studies A collection of Bible studies based on the readings for each Sunday Worship Resources Youth Ministry Webinars Youth Nights Everything you need to plan a youth night around a specific topic.

Devotion: Keep Going

by Lisa Hellyer

Text: Hebrews 12:1 One of the greatest memories in my life is the one I have of attending the 1996 Summer Olympics in Atlanta, Georgia. Watching track and field can be a little confusing, but I got better at paying attention to the events that were worth watching.

One event that didn’t seem worth watching was a women’s qualifying heat for some really long run around

the track. I don’t know how many marked out for us.” I love that! I wontimes they had to run around it, but it der if that Olympic athlete wanted was a lot. I watched them leave the to quit. I wonder if she questioned blocks, but as they settled in to their what she was doing among a group run, my attention eventually went of such gifted runners.

My friend, Jesus has called you elsewhere—until I noticed all the women were done racing, except to run the race of ministry. He has for one. I don’t know what country uniquely gifted you to do just that. she was from, but I’m guessing it was Hear His encouragement to keep a small place without much money going in the midst of fear, doubt, to invest in athletes. There she was, criticism and heartache. Hear His not a chance in the world of quali- words of calling in the midst of feelfying to run in the medal event, but ing inadequate. Hear the people He still running as if she was going for has surrounded you with to encourthe gold. This would be her only time age you in the journey. on the track. With her competitors Reflect: Who has God surrounded you off the track, she still had 2 laps to go. As she rounded the corner to with as a source of encouragement make her final lap, everyone in the to keep going? How can you be instands—and I mean everyone—got tentional about spending more time to their feet to cheer her on. It was with them? so cool! All eyes were on her. Every- Prayer: Lord, in the midst of my desire to one cheering her to run. And run she did! She could feel the encour- throw in the towel, allow me to hear Your voice along with the voices of agement of the crowd.

It reminded me then and it reminds those you’ve given to me. Strengthme now of Hebrews 12:1, “Therefore, en me, Lord, for the journey. Emsince we are surrounded by such a power me by Your Holy Spirit to run great cloud of witnesses, let us throw the race You’ve marked out for me. off everything that hinders and the In Jesus’ Name. Amen. published online June 2014 sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race thESource unplugged | 2014 | 11

resources

Free Resources

resources

free

Bible Study: Do You Believe in Love? Real Love?

by Bo Chapman, DCE

If love is love, and God is love, then isn’t same sex love okay? lovingly, intelligently and unasham- conversation to have a chance to Overview & Purpose 2013 was a busy year when you edly state what we believe, why we be fruitful, we need to maintain a look at the number of times the issue believe it and how that influences or high level of respect for each other.

A great rule of thumb is that in evof homosexuality hit the news outlets words and actions. erything you say, you should strive to in one way or another. There was Definitions matter…

[Leader - Because you want to honor yourself, honor others and to everything from the battle at the Supreme Court over DOMA, various make sure everyone is on the same honor God. Secondly, we want to make sure sports professionals coming “out of page when discussing this issue, the closet,” several states legalizing start by setting the “ground rules” of that we are all on the same page gay marriage, to the reaction over what is meant when a certain word when it comes to the words that we the remarks made by Phil Robertson is used. This will help bring clarity to use and the meaning behind them. from “Duck Dynasty,” just to name the conversation and will help in the So, we are going to establish the processing of the topic by allowing definitions for the following words a few.

Without a doubt, the whole issue of everyone to present their thoughts/ and use that as our foundation to homosexuality is a huge reality that ideas/questions in the context of an build upon throughout our study.

(The definitions below have been is impacting the lives of our students, unchanging foundation.]

Because the topic of love and garnered from dictionary.com and families and congregations in general. There is no avoiding the topic, homosexuality can be a potentially C. S. Lewis’ The Four Loves to help and because of that it is important “volatile” discussion matter, it is im- facilitate the conversation if the stuthat we really look at what God’s portant that we set a few “ground dents get stuck or can’t agree.)

Word says in its fullness so we can rules” for the discussion. First, for our 12| www.youthESource.com

thESource unplugged | 2014 | 13

resources

• 1 Timothy 1:9-11 – We also know that the law is made not for the righteous but for lawbreakers and rebels, the ungodly and sinful, the unholy and irreligious, for those who kill their fathers or mothers, for murderers, for the sexually immoral, for those practicing homosexuality, for slave traders and liars and perjurers–and for whatever else is contrary to the sound doctrine that conforms to the gospel concerning the glory of the blessed God, which he entrusted to me.

• Romans 1:26-27 – Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural sexual relations for unnatural ones. In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed shameful acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their error.

• 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 – Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.

free

After looking at those three pasHomosexual - a person who is sexually attracted to members of the sages, what type of love do you believe they are referring to if we utilize same sex Homosexuality - sexual desire or be- the definitions of the four types of havior directed toward a person or love listed earlier?

Are there other passages in Scrippersons of one’s own sex Agape love – the love of God or ture that you can think of that speak about God’s love?

Christ for humankind What type of love are those pasEros love – physical love; sexual desages referring to (agape, storge, sire Philia love – close friendship or broth- philia, or eros)?

God in His very nature is love, erly love Storge love – parental affection, the agape love. It is a love that goes instinctive affection which animals beyond anything we can imagine.

Humanity got a glimpse of that love have for their young as Jesus hung on the cross. Romans God’s Love With some definitions under our 5:6-8 captures that picture of love belt, let’s look at what God’s Word so beautifully by saying, “You see, at has to say about love. When it comes just the right time, when we were still to the topic of love, especially God’s powerless, Christ died for the ungodlove, three passages are used with ly. Very rarely will anyone die for a regularity. They are (have students righteous person, though for a good person someone might possibly look them up and read aloud): • John 3:16 – For God so loved the dare to die. But God demonstrates world that he gave his one and his own love for us in this: While we only Son, that whoever believes were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

That is love! But let’s get back to in him shall not perish but have the original question, “If love is love, eternal life.

• 1 Corinthians 13:4-8(a) – Love is and God is love, then isn’t same sex patient, love is kind. It does not love okay?”

Outside of true love, what are envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, some other aspects that make up it is not self-seeking, it is not easily the nature of God? (Some examples angered, it keeps no record of are perfect, merciful, faithful, judge, wrongs. Love does not delight in jealous, unchanging, etc.)

Just as God is 100% love, He is also evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, al- 100% holy. Sticking with the imporways hopes, always perseveres. tance of definitions, what would be your definition of holy? (Some examLove never fails.

• 1 John 4:7-12 – Dear friends, let us ples are set apart, a spiritually pure love one another, for love comes quality, one perfect in goodness from God. Everyone who loves and righteousness, etc.)

Scripture talks about God being has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does holy and the call for us to be holy. A not know God, because God is great verse to look up is: love. This is how God showed his • 1 Peter 1:14-16 – As obedient children, do not conform to the evil love among us: He sent his one desires you had when you lived and only Son into the world that in ignorance. But just as he who we might live through him. This is called you is holy, so be holy in all love: not that we loved God, but you do; for it is written: “Be holy, that he loved us and sent his Son because I am holy.” as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.

If God is 100% holy, He is without Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one an- sin. He is blameless and pure. God other. No one has ever seen God; hates sin. Through His word we see but if we love one another, God the practice of homosexuality (actlives in us and his love is made ing upon that sexual desire for someone of the same sex) called sin. complete in us.

Some great texts for this are:

resources

free

Throughout Scripture we see several things reveal themselves over and over again.

• God is love and love is at the very core of all that He does • God is holy and hates sin • The practice of homosexuality is sin [Have students process these statements carefully to make sure everyone is on the same page. If there are disagreements, go back and read through Scripture to see where the disagreements are coming from for your group. This may take you through various others passages, which is a positive because as students wrestle with this important topic in the lens of God’s Word—as opposed to what the world is telling them—it can really strengthen their the love of God that forgives sins, 10). Keeping these two aspects of heals lives, changes hearts, gives God in mind helps us to stand up for faith and understanding.]

If the three statements above are hope and saves souls. We have the the truth in regards to homosexuality all true, how do we respond to the chance to share with others about and to also give hope for those who are struggling. question at the very beginning, “If Jesus Christ.

[Leaders - My hope is that this Bible Continuing on from John 3:16, we love is love, and God is love, then study helps you and your students to isn’t same sex love okay?” (Let the read these powerful words: students really process through this • John 3:17 - For God did not send begin the hard conversations and to his Son into the world to con- continue to dig deeper into God’s question as well.) demn the world, but to save the Word to see what love truly is, what The world in general wants people God has to say about homosexualworld through him. to say “yes” to that question, and ity (and all sexual sins for that matWe also read later in John: if you disagree then it tends to get you labeled as homophobic, intol- • John 10:10 The thief comes only ter) and how we as believers can to steal and kill and destroy; I respond with love, conviction, and erant, or maybe even hateful. Yet, have come that they may have knowledge.] when we understand that God is published online March 2014 life, and have it to the full. love and God is holy, we also realize God is completely holy so He can’t that God doesn’t contradict Himself.

Bo Chapman, DCE, has been working in This allows us to have a firm founda- tolerate sin. God is also completely student ministry for the past 16 years and is tion from which to stand in regard to love, so He offers hope, forgiveness currently serving as the Director of Student and restoration for “those who re- Ministries at St. Peter Lutheran Church in the conversation of homosexuality.

But not only do we have a firm pent of their sins and turn in faith to Macomb, MI. He is extremely thankful for foundation on which to stand, we Jesus Christ, who suffered the pun- God’s blessing of a wonderful wife and two have something powerful and life- ishment for the sins of ALL people by vibrant kids. He also loves the opportunity changing to offer to those who are his death on the cross and rose from he has to be involved in the lives of students struggling with homosexuality and the dead to give those who trust in and parents on a regular basis. Most of all, to the world as a whole. We have Him new and abundant life, now Bo loves his Lord and Savior, and his desire the opportunity to share with others and forever” (John 10:10; 1 John 1:8- is to both share and live out the love and truth of Jesus Christ each and every day.

Word One Bible Studies are a collection of studies based on the Gospel lessons for Lectionary Series A. This series will include a study for every Sunday of the church year and for some festivals, allowing you to explore with youth the same texts that are heard in worship on Sunday morning.

Word One Bible Studies provide relational, group Bible studies in which participants have the opportunity to learn from each other. As participants move into the Word, they are encouraged to build relationships; to examine priorities, values and beliefs and to publicly share how God is present in their world.

14| www.youthESource.com

free

by Stephanie Warner, DCE

Water Balloon Volleyball - We Every year, usually in the summer, I sit at my desk surrounded by school have done this two ways: 1. Using district calendars, my personal cal- an actual net, kids partner up with a endar and our church’s master cal- towel held between them to catch/ endar and attempt to plan our entire launch water balloons, or 2. Park our year’s worth of ministry activities for two church vans together with a youth (usually August-August). While tarp in between—balloons must be I am the one responsible for making thrown underhand and attempted sure our acitivities do not overlap to be caught Slip n Slide Kickball - bases are something major at our church, I get my students to plan EVERYTHING we kiddie pools with a slip-n-slide into do—from special activities to ser- home plate.

Giant Tarp Slip n Slide - use several vice projects to topics we hit at our large tarps to create a slip n slide. weekly youth nights. Here’s how!

The weekend after school starts, Messy Game/Plan Night Split kids up into small groups we have a big “Game/Plan” Night.

We bring all of our students togeth- (we’ve done it by grade). Using an er for a night of crazy and out-of- old sheet or butcher paper and the-ordinary games. In August the ketchup and mustard to design weather is normally still decent, so their team “flag” for the event. Play we are able to do everything out- games such as the baby diaper side. We alternate each year be- chocolate bar game (common tween a Messy Game/Plan Night at baby showers but my students and a Water-themed Game/Plan loved it—they have to try and guess night. Here are some examples of the chocolate bar melted in the diaper), relay with digging gummy the games that we do at each: worms out of chocolate pudding, Wet ‘n Wild Game/Plan Night Water Balloon Name Toss - Toss pulling grapes out of a kiddie pool water balloons around a circle while filled with ice with their toes, Flour saying the person’s name you are Ball (flour “ultimate frisbee” with two tossing to—great for a beginning of trash cans and flour balls made out the school year activity when you of flour and panty hose) and Spam have new students. Start over every Ball (same concept as flour ball but with Spam). time a balloon breaks.

Stephanie Warner is a 2010 DCE/Education graduate of Concordia University Nebraska, and currently serves as Director of Student Ministry at Peace Lutheran Church in Arvada, Colo. She is currently finishing her Master’s degree in Family Life Ministry through CUNE. Stephanie is a proud nativeborn Texan, but loves exploring the mountains of Colorado. She loves adventures with her husband Andy and their two dogs, traveling, reading and talking to teenagers about Jesus and His incredible love!

thESource unplugged | 2014 | 15

resources

Game/Plan Night

This is the crazy part of the evening.

Generally we do this for an hour to an hour and a half, and I bridge to the planning part of the evening with a devotion on Baptism—being washed/wiped clean and being claimed as Christ’s own. A Baptism devotion works with either type of event and is a great way to kick off the school year with that reminder.

Then, we move inside to the planning part of our evening. We have four large sheets of newsprint with the following categories: Free Activities, Activities that Cost $, Ways to Serve, Topics to Discuss. We put an even number of kids around each sheet with markers, and give them two minutes to brainstorm on the sheet what they would like to do this year. After two minutes, every group rotates to the next sheet to fill in their ideas. After all the groups have gone through the sheets, we give each student two dot stickers per sheet to “vote” on what they want to do.

They go around to the sheets in their groups again, this time with a minute to decide what activities to put their stickers by. Once this is done, I collect the sheets, we pray, tell the kids what our next event is (the only one that I have pre-planned besides the Game/Plan Night) and send them on their way. I then take the sheets, compile the results into a word document, and place the high “votegetters” into our calendar where they fit best and our schedule is done! This way, the kids have a fun night planning out the year, I can get the entire schedule of events out to parents in September and the kids feel like their opinion on what we do matters! published online June 2014

resources

free

Skit: Don’t Forget Your Umbrella

by Mark Engelhardt, DCE

Based on Luke 9:51-62.

Joe is a good guy, a good Christian and has a great desire to share God’s Word. Unfortunately, Joe doesn’t have much success, and he wants God’s help in taking out his troubles on those who have rejected him and his attempts to share God’s Word.

(Person 1 is a businessperson. He crosses stage quickly while talking on cell phone. Joe approaches the person quickly and walks and talks with the same fast intensity.)

Joe: (speaking quickly) Hi, I’m Joe. Do you mind if I ask you a few questions about where you are going to spend eternity?

Person 1: (stopping suddenly, Joe stops too. Person 1 speaks into his phone) Hold on. Some jerk is interrupting me. (to Joe) Seriously? You can see I’m on the phone. What do you think you’re doing? I don’t have time for this. Get away from me, you moron. Go. Shoo. Right now.

(Joe, backs away, person 1 quickly leaves) 16| www.youthESource.com

Joe: (to himself) Well, excuse me for trying to give you something better to work towards then your own selfserving ways.

(Person 2 enters pushing stroller, she stops to tend to child who is fussing, Joe approaches her.)

Joe: Hi, I’m Joe, would you like any help? I’m great with kids, and I’d love to be able to share some Bible stories with you and your child.

Person 2: Get away from me, you weirdo. I don’t want your help. I’ve never even seen you before. Don’t try and talk to me about your little stories either. You come near my child again and I’ll call the police!

(Person 2 quickly pushes stroller away) Joe: Wait! I wasn’t… Sheesh! What kind of person does she think I am?

(Once woman is out of earshot he hollers back at the woman) You’ll be sorry you didn’t talk to me in 10 years when that little hooligan is the terror of the 7th grade! (speaks to self) Trust me, I know 7th grade hooligans. What an awful year that was..

(Persons 3 and 4 enter laughing and throwing a ball back and forth to each other. Joe goes over to introduce himself) Joe: Hey, you guys playing catch?

Person 3: You’re pretty quick there, aren’t you, Captain Obvious?

Joe: Oh, you must have me confused with someone else. My name is Joe. Person 4: Oh really? You know what, Captain? Whatever it is you’re selling, we don’t want any of it.

Joe: No, you don’t understand. I’m not selling anything. And I’m certainly not a captain. I just want to tell you about the love of Jesus.

Person 3: Look, Joe, we’re meeting a bunch of other people for a game here in a little bit. So, why don’t you do us all a favor and go love us a little less. Okay? Thanks.

Joe: But I just want to know if you know how much Jesus loves you.

Person 4: You need to leave us alone now, Joe, otherwise my friends BamBam and Thumper (flexes muscles and makes fists), are going to show you a little love. Take a hike.

free

was help people. I just wanted to share the Gospel with them. Is that so wrong?

Tom: No, Joe, there’s nothing wrong with sharing the Gospel. In fact. there’s nothing better than to be able to share the Gospel with someone. But you understand it’s not always going to be easy, right?

Joe: I do now.

Tom: Yeah, I guess you do. You know, sometimes people are just not ready to hear about the Gospel.

Jesus even told His disciples it’s not going to be easy. Some will want to hear it, and others, well, they just think they’ve got it all under control already. Can I ask you something else? I overheard you as I was getting here. Did you really want God to rain fire and brimstone down on those guys?

Joe: It’s not like they don’t deserve it.

They were jerks.

Tom: I’m not saying that. They may deserve it. But that’s kind of my point.

They deserve it. You deserve it. I deserve it. We all deserve it, don’t we?

After all, we are all sinners in need of a savior.

Joe: Yes, but we are sorry for our sins.

They are not.

Tom: Are you sorry for your sins? All of them? Including being judge, jury and executioner to those guys?

Joe: I get it now. “Judge Judy.” Ha, that’s funny. Yeah, I guess you’re right. It’s because of the Father’s great love for us that He sent His son to die for all of us, even the unrepentant people of the world.

Tom: That’s right. You know, just because you didn’t have success in sharing your faith with them…

Joe: (Joe interrupts Tom) Sharing my

faith with them? I barely got to share my name with them.

Tom: Don’t worry about it. Just because you didn’t get the chance to share the Gospel with them doesn’t mean they won’t listen to the next person. Maybe we just need to be persistent. Who knows, with the help of the Holy Spirit, maybe these people will be responsive to hearing the Gospel the next time someone approaches them.

Joe: I know you’re right, Tom. It’s still frustrating, though. I just want to quit and let God sort it all out in the end.

Tom: Don’t quit now, Joe. What does the Bible tell us in 1 Peter? “Always be prepared to give an answer to anyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have.”

And this next part is important, too, “But do this with gentleness and respect.”

Joe: Alright. I’ll stop calling down fire and brimstone on people and keep showering them with love instead.

Tom: There you go. That’s what I like to hear. Come on, I’ll buy you a soda. My treat. And who knows, maybe we’ll get another opportunity to talk to someone about that hope that we have inside of us.

Joe: Sounds good, Tom. Thanks, man.

You’re alright. No matter what everyone else says about you, you’re alright.

Tom: What are you talking about?

Who’s talking bad about me?

Joe: Gotcha!

Tom: Very funny. Come on; let’s get out here before we need a cast iron umbrella.

(Exit laughing with each other.)

End scene published online May 2013

Visit the new www.youthESource.com!

Offering the same great resources written by LCMS DCEs, pastors, teachers, and lay leaders, and now including resources from the National Youth Gathering, LCMS Servant Events and Young Adult Ministry

You can stay up-to-date with the latest content in a number of ways: Follow us at http://Twitter.com/youthESource www.Facebook.com/youthESource Go to the website and subscribe to the RSS Feed or the weekly email update. thESource unplugged | 2014 | 17

resources

(Joe backs away, turns around, crosses to opposite side of stage. Person 3 and 4 exit laughing at Joe.) (Tom enters, Joe doesn’t see him.)

Joe: (Muttering) Bam-Bam and Thumper. Humph. I wish I could go all Old Testament on them. They’d be sorry when it starts to rain fire and brimstone on their ball game. Not even a cast iron umbrella would help them.

Tom: Hey, Joe, what’s going on?

You’re looking a little frustrated right now. What’s up?

Joe: (with frustration) Hey, Tom. I’ll tell you what’s wrong. I came out here to just talk to people, to try and share the love of God with them, but people are being completely unresponsive. The first guy was too busy, and he shooed me away. The next lady needed help with her baby, and she threatened to call the police on me. And Hans and Franz over there just threatened to beat me up.

I mean, what is this? It’s like its 7th grade all over again. But they’re the ones who will be sorry. We don’t know the day or the hour, but they better hope it’s not today. Cause, if they don’t turn, they’re gonna burn.

You know what I’m talking about?

They better get sanctified or chicken fried. Am I right?!

Tom: Whoa, whoa, settle down there, Judge Judy.

Joe: And that’s another thing, why can’t anyone call me by my name?

I’m Joe, not Judy, Joe! Tom: (calmly) Okay, I’m sorry, Joe. I can see you are upset and I shouldn’t have said that. I’m sorry. (pause) Are you okay?

Joe: (pause) Yeah, I’m alright. It’s just so frustrating. All I wanted to do

worker

the youth

The Youth Worker You work with youth–full-time, part-time, professionally, voluntarily…. How do you keep yourself energized, excited, focused and refreshed? How do you keep learning and growing? Check out these resources!

Interns & Rookies All Things New: Intern Stories Blog, DCE Internship Longevity in Ministry The Stride Blog

Professional Development Book Club, Goals, Leadership Training, Mentoring Women in Ministry Girl Talk Blog Life as a Youth Worker Accountability, Balance, Burnout, Dealing with Discouragement, Encouragement, Health, Humility, Youth Worker Faith

We hope to add more to this section of the website! What topics would you like to see covered that deal with taking care of yourself and growing as a youth worker? Send your ideas to youthESource@gmail. com.

Devotion: First Things First

by Lisa Hellyer

think about what else you could be sidetracked by our own agenda. It’s doing. The important thing is to walk. easy to forget to keep first things first.

And we’ll do that one step at a time, We worry about what others around us can do better than we can. Our until it comes naturally.

Sometimes ministry is just like that. minds fill with all the things we could When Joshua was getting ready to be doing to be more productive. go into the Promised Land, God had But God says that what is most imsome clear instructions for him. He portant is spending time with Him— says in Joshua 1:7-9, “Be strong and through His Word, in conversation, very courageous. Be careful to obey among relationships that strengthen all the law my servant Moses gave our faith. As we do that one step at you; do not turn from it to the right or a time, we learn to walk daily with to the left, that you may be success- Jesus. We come to know Him better ful wherever you go. Keep this Book and to trust Him more and more.

God is so faithful! He calls us to rest of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you in the love He has for us. He invites may be careful to do everything us to discover Him in the pages and written in it. Then you will be prosper- pages of Scripture. And He longs for ous and successful. Have I not com- us to sit at His feet. He will take care manded you? Be strong and coura- of the details. geous.

Do not be afraid; do not be Reflect: Text: Joshua 1:7-9 One of my favorite Christmas car- discouraged, for the LORD your God • What causes you to lose sight of the priority of time with the Lord? toons is “Santa Claus Is Comin’ To will be with you wherever you go.”

Step 1: Obey the Word. Step 2: • What one step can you take toTown.” It’s pretty old school, but still day in order to sit at the feet of really great stuff! In this classic, the Don’t deviate from the Word. Step Jesus?

Winter Warlock has seen the error of 3: Do what the Word says. Step 4: Prayer: his ways and Santa is teaching him Meditate on the Word all the time.

Father, You are so good to us and Those were good words for Joshthrough song to just get started. He sings, “Put one foot in front of the oth- ua as he prepared to lead God’s you call us to sit at Your feet, to crawl er and soon you’ll be walkin’ ‘cross people, and they are good words onto Your lap and drink in the goodthe floor. Put one foot in front of the for us as we have the privilege of ness of Your grace. Give us strength other and soon you’ll be walkin’ out leading God’s people as well. It is so to push aside the distractions and to the door.” First things first. Don’t wor- easy to get distracted by our long focus on Your presence in our lives. ry about what others can do. Don’t list of things to do. It’s easy to get In Jesus’ Name. Amen. published online June 2014 18| www.youthESource.com

Generally, when I think of moving outside the church walls, I think of evangelism and getting church members active in the community.

That is certainly a crucial aspect of ministry, but it’s easy for us as church workers to lose sight of our opportunities to take our own experience, talents and expertise outside of our own congregation. I’m not talking solely about evangelizing, but also in looking at how we can use our gifts to impact others in the body of believers outside of our congregation. If we are not involved in anything outside of our congregation, I think we’re missing out on a great opportunity.

Serving outside of your congregation in a behind-the-scenes capacity is one option for moving outside the church walls. You can put in volunteer hours at a local food pantry, serve on a local committee or board or any number of other opportunities to impact your community. By serving in a role that is not up-front, leadership-based you are given a chance to develop your character as a servant, which in turn will impact

how you serve in your leadership role in your congregation. Serving others in the name of Jesus can be a very invigorating experience and can reenergize you for service in the parish. It’s essentially taking the idea behind a sabbatical (taking time away from the congregation to do something that will help reenergize and refocus you to return and posiRead more from the All Things New: Intively impact others in that role) and tern Stories blog at www.youthESource. living it out in a regular way through- com. out your time in the ministry. This is a Brandon Metcalf is currently serving as very healthy and beneficial practice a DCE intern at Christ the King Lutheran for all in church work.

Church in Lake Ozark, MO. The internship Not only are behind-the-scenes is his final year in the DCE program at Conopportunities ways that you can cordia University-Nebraska. Out of all his move outside the church walls, but ministry roles, he especially loves teachalso leading in other areas is just as ing and speaking to those of all ages. His beneficial. Sharing your expertise theme verse for ministry is Ephesians 6:19, with others is a benefit not only to “Pray also for me, that whenever I open my you, but also to those whom you mouth words may be given me, so that I are sharing with. I recently had the will fearlessly make known the mystery of chance to partner with an area Lu- the Gospel.” theran high school to help plan their annual Witness Workshop, which is basically a simulation station for evangelism. As part of that role, I taught religion for two days in the school and then led chapel on the thESource unplugged | 2014 | 19

worker

by Brandon Metcalf, DCE

the youth

All Things New: Moving Outside the Church Walls

day of the workshop. I loved being able to teach and share God’s Word with these students, and the school really appreciated having an outside person come in and talk about the subject. For whatever reason, as humans we have a tendency to give greater credibility to guest speakers than we do to those we hear from all the time. Even if you said the exact same thing as one of the local people, chances are that those listening will give it more weight due to the fact that it was presented by an expert or guest speaker. That’s one of the reasons why the National Youth Gathering has such an impact on youth. Sometimes it takes an outside person to reinforce the message that you’ve been sharing all along in order for it to sink in. As a youth worker, you can be that outside person for others around you not in your congregation, so share that blessing with others.

As youth workers, one of the best things we can do to prepare for our service in the parish is to go out and serve others outside of our congregation. Not only is this a benefit to us and our ministries, but more importantly, it is a way that we can impact a different group of people with the message of the Gospel. That’s a calling not just for youth workers, but for all followers of Christ. published online March 2014

worker

the youth

The Challenges of Being a Young Adult Church Worker

by Rebekah Freed, DCE

I helped a teammate lead a group surprised, reacted by simply asking, of middle schoolers on a youth re- “How old are you, anyway?”

Thankfully, I’ve learned to laugh off treat in another state a couple years ago. During some of the late night being mistaken for a middle school activities, I was looking to see if one student and my pastor lovingly enof my students was in the ridiculously couraged me with the words of 1 long laser-tron line when I heard an Timothy 4:12 before I left his office adult leader from another church the day of that meeting. However, start getting on to a student for cut- being a young adult in ministry certing in line. I continued on my pursuit tainly has its challenges. After talking of my student while listening to her with some other young church proget increasingly frustrated that the fessionals, here are a few of the top student was ignoring her. Eventually, challenges we face: I turned around to discover she was We “don’t know anything”.

“What can a twenty-something talking to ME. Fast forward a few years to a single tell me about parenting a meeting with my Senior Pastor and teenager?” Whether it’s talking a ministry leader from a local uni- with a parent about their teenager versity organization. As the meeting or trying to give input at a meeting wrapped up, my pastor indicated to of church leadership, many young the man that I am the one in charge adult church workers experience of college ministry and therefore, this idea of being “less than” simply future conversations would mainly because we are younger and therehappen through me rather than him, fore seen as not having enough exthe senior pastor. The young man, perience. It takes time and a lot of 20| www.youthESource.com

effort to earn the trust of older congregation members and/or staff.

Three years after being at my current call, I had a ministry leader approach me to share that for the whole time I had been there, she never really valued anything I had to say nor believed I should have been hired. She then apologized for acting that way the past few years, saying that her opinion was primarily based upon my age. She continued by saying that she could now see the gifts and experiences I brought to the team and was thankful for them. Just because we may be young does not mean that we are not equipped or capable of doing our jobs, but it seems that way to many.

We’re expected to know “everything.”

No, really?!? How CAN I encourage parents of teenagers when I’m barely out of teenage years myself?

While some people do think we don’t know anything, the reality is that we still have a lot to learn and we haven’t experienced everything in life yet. I have a lot of training and experience with kids and teenagers, but, I’ve never been a parent. However, much of our jobs are to equip and strengthen moms and dads as they parent their kids and help them grow in their faith. This messy paradox is often intimidating and overwhelming.

We want a life outside of work.

I absolutely LOVE leading the young adult ministry, yet it is also the source of many challenges in ministry and life. How do you build a friend group, when most of your interactions with people your age are also connected in some way with your job? Boundaries can also be an issue. When a young adult I know is struggling with something, I often have trouble figuring out which hat to wear as I help them: “friend” or “DCE”. Even if you’re not responsible for young adult ministry, most Christian young people who move to a new area for work likely find their friends at the church. What do you do when church and work are the same place?

volunteer, God has called you to serve His people in a specific place at a specific time. Cling to that calling and, more importantly, the One who called you. As God told Jeremiah: “Do not say to me, ‘I am only a youth’; for to all to whom I send you, you shall go, and whatever I command you, you shall speak” (1:7).

Run after God. Trust Him and let him worry about all the details!

(Oh, and don’t forget the benefits of being a young adult church worker too…college life prepares you well for staying up all night at lock-ins and eating pizza for a week on a mission trip!) published online September 2014 Rebekah Freed is a Kansas-grown girl who went to college in the cornfields of Nebraska before being sent to Tonawanda, New York, in 2010 on her DCE internship at First Trinity Lutheran Church. She joyfully continues to serve there as the Director of High School and Young Adult Ministries.

In the few warm months that Buffalo has, Bekah enjoys spending time outside hiking, facilitating the high ropes course at a nearby camp, or visiting the many parks and waterfalls in the area. The rest of the year, she bundles up inside reading, writing, playing her guitar and wishing it was warm out. She occasionally writes about ministry and life on her blog joyfullyblessed.wordpress.com.

Write for the youthESource!

Do you have an idea for a Bible study or skit? Are you an expert on a particular subject and want to share your thoughts with others? Consider writing for youthESource!

We’re always looking for new ideas and new writers. Send an email to youthESource@gmail.com to share your interest in writing. thESource unplugged | 2014 | 21

worker

Be patient and humble.

Go the extra mile even when it seems ridiculous. Dress professionally.

Be early. Wait three years if you have to. Do what it takes to earn trust. No, it’s not always fair, but sometimes it’s what we have to do. Also, don’t just ignore people in your congregation who may not value your input; get to know them and listen to them. Be confident in your skills, yet humble.

“For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you” (Romans 12:3).

Remember your calling!

Whether you’re officially called by a congregation or roped in as a lay

the youth

We’re still figuring out who we are.

The reality is that as twenty-somethings, we’re still figuring out key aspects of who we are. All humans come out of childhood carrying some “junk.” Sorting through that while trying to be a confident, effective ministry leader can be pretty confusing at times. Some of the other challenges above can introduce huge pressure to live up to a standard and “prove yourself” within the church. Trying to “prove yourself” while still figuring out the person God has made and called you to be isn’t the best combination for a healthy life and ministry.

So, What’s a Young Adult to Do? Run to God’s Word!

First of all, young adults, remind yourself frequently of passages that speak to the challenges you face. For example, the one my Pastor shared with me a few months ago: “Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity” (1 Timothy 4:12). Let God’s Word lead, guide, and comfort you rather than the challenges you may face or the expectations of others.

Find Mentors Older church workers and members, WE NEED YOU! Walk with us.

Encourage us. Challenge us. Help us grow in the areas where we really don’t have experience and call out the gifts you see in us. Also, if I may be so bold to say this, YOU need us as well! We bring different perspectives and ideas. Let’s work together in God’s Kingdom!

worker

the youth

Boundaries: Secrets from DCEs who Thrived, Not Just Survived

by Dr. Craig Oldenburg, DCE Each year dozens of professional church workers leave their position at their church. Why they leave is no secret to many of us. They have gotten to the point that they cannot control their workload; they cannot prove they are making any headway; they have poor communication with their colleagues; and they are just... spinning...their...wheels. Gr-i-n-d. Eeeeerk. Hault.

“My pastor doesn’t even talk to me.”

“My position is being eliminated.”

“I am just barely keeping my head above water.”

“Some days I don’t even know where to start.”

“I need someone who will just tell me what to do.”

22| www.youthESource.com

Whether you are saying these words right now, just thinking the words, or having the time of your life, there are secrets you should know.

The secrets that cause purposeful thriving and not accidental surviving.

Ask these four1 questions: 1. Do you stick to your original position description when setting your goals?

2. Do you write and promote all your goals or assume some can remain unwritten?

3. Do you know where your calendar is?

4. Do you read and live out the principles found in the book Margin (Swenson 2004)?

If you answered YES to 1 of these,

well, at least we know you are alive.

If you answered YES to 2 of these you, at least know some of the secrets.

If you answered YES to 3 of these, hopefully one of them was #3.

If you answered YES to 4 of these, you are on your way to thriving longterm as a DCE. Look at the essence of the four questions above and how you can make new choices about position descriptions, goals, calendars and margin.

Stick to Your Original Position Description Hero worship is big in America and you want to be that hero. Your pastor, quite innocently, asks for a special favor and you turn it into a new

thESource unplugged | 2014 | 23

worker

to write, but a place for you to plan out how to lead people forward.

You are the leader. So go find your calendar.

The Book Margin Richard Swenson wrote a marvelous book that every professional church worker should read and develop habits to live by. The book describes how we need to plan to maintain margin in our lives. Swenson measured the white space of a book’s page and estimates that about 40% of a page in the average book is empty space. He uses this as a metaphor for life and work. The important things in work and life should be planned into 60% of our waking time. We intentionally leave margin. A lot of margin. A lot of space.

Space for the events of life and ministry to happen without causing the feeling that you must pass by on the other side of the road instead of stopping for the real ministry of the church.

What does this mean? Giving some things up. Giving up...ummmm... well. Some of you pride your-

the youth

line on the “to-do” list. It isn’t related reading goals...they all make up to your position, your mission or your your ministry results. Don’t just write ministry goals, but you like the atten- down, “Take a hike with family,” either. That can result in a hike with tion and the praise.

There are times when emergencies the family checked off the “to-do” happen and you are the only one list while your mind was on all the trained to handle a particular situa- things you had to get done back tion. Fine. But your ministry is equip- at the office. No. That hike with the ping the saints, not entertaining the family (or friends) is a focused time of listening and laughing, celebratsaints with your fantastic abilities.

On the other hand, some of you ing and serving together. It is part of stick to your job description to a your ministry.

Goals are not “to-do” lists. They fault. You are not willing to go the extra mile when ministry calls you to are bigger. They look to what you stick your neck out. This faulty pro- want someone or something to betectionism is not a healthy bound- come, not to what you have gotten ary, but selfish minimalizing of what done. They are future oriented, not checklist oriented. They give you ministry really is.

Real heroes stick to the mission. something to run toward and give They discard all that makes them those you influence something to blend in with the crowd and do the run toward. You are not just teachjob they were called to do. They ing confirmation once a week to get don’t get sidetracked. Their mission content into junior highers’ brains; maximizes ministry because every- you are preparing a people to be one wants to be with them. Why? sent into the world to be a light to Because their mission is clear. It is the nations.

Your Calendar concise.

Do you know where it is? For many Put All Your Goals in Writing Many of you write the goals down of you it is in your head. Write it down you think people “over you” want to and get it out of your head. Boundknow, put those goals in a drawer aries allow you to put and then you continue on doing aside what is not yours whatever gets thrown your way. Hey at the time. There will kids. Class is over. Life is not a home- be so much pressure for work assignment. Put away your stu- you to “succeed,” but dent persona. One secret of being a if you are always “on long-term and happy DCE is to take call” you will not influence well and you will charge. This starts with your goals.

All right. You are going to cry once not stay healthy. Emerin a while even if you have every gencies aside, you goal clearly posted and have armies need to have “retreat” of people helping you to achieve time. Holy time. Time set them. But then at least you know apart with our Father.

Some of you have all why you are crying. Don’t be tossed to and fro like waves in the wind. Set you need on your cell your hand to the plow, brother and phone, iPhone, or Blackberry; others of you are sister DCEs. Oh, and the pastor. The pastor still writing things down who does not make his way down on your hands. These the hall to talk to you might not have are still “to-do” formats the same goals as you do. Well, duh! of living. Your calendar It is up to you to get him on board. needs to reflect your To dog him. Do your goals align with goals, not your to-do list. the goals of the congregation? Then The calendar is not a retrain your pastor up to be a partner active tool but a proacin those goals. Your goals are valu- tive tool. The calendar is not for you to write able...right!?

Remember, write down ALL your things down that your goals...like family goals, health goals, church leaders tell you

worker

the youth

selves in your ability to multitask. You don’t give a few things attention because you are afraid you might miss out on something. Swenson, an M.D., tells a story of giving up a nice car so that he could spend more time with his family. A nice car was not his goal, a nice family was. What is your goal?

Please tell me that your ministry is more than having a nice car.

Some of you have said YES to low paying DCE positions. But your goal is more outstanding. Some of you are envious of people who have more.

More money. More technological gadgets. More square footage in their homes. More toilets in their homes. But your goal has more momentum than all of this. All of this is a choice. What you place your value in is a choice. How you see yourself

as blessed or not is a choice. This is what Swenson writes ferociously to help us understand.

Position descriptions. Goals. Calendars. Margin. Four secrets revealed.

Quantifiably the most valuable tools in a leader’s belt. Four tools developed to give us freedom, not to bind us. When they are in place, they free us to take breaks while still handling our responsibilities. When they are exercised well, they free us to live with time for wiping tears and listening more sincerely. When implanted with discipline, they provide time for stopping because it is healthy, rather than stopping because we have no other choice. And that should never ever again be a secret.

So will it be survive or thrive?

1 These questions are absolutely NOT scientific. I just made them up

based on what I have observed new DCEs struggling with in the field.

They honestly represent the characteristics of DCEs who are struggling. They also represent the gifts, skills and actions of DCEs who, in my opinion, thrive.

Swenson, Richard. Margin. NavPress, 2004. published online May 2009 Craig has served in elementary education, youth ministry, outdoor ministry, and challenge course facilitation and development. He is the former DCE program director at Concordia University, Portland. He currently serves as the director of Camp Concordia, located on the Woodbeck chain of lakes north of Grand Rapids, Michigan. Craig and his wife Mary have one daughter, Whitney.

Save the Date!

July 12-15, 2015 New Orleans, LA

* Adults who attend #NATIONAL15 may qualify to receive one FREE Gathering Registration!

Learn more at www.nlywc.com under the “Rates” tab.

24| www.youthESource.com

youth

Explore the world of today’s teens, from the ways their minds work to the ways the world tries to work on their minds. Here are some of the topics we cover on this section of the website: Adolescent Development Church in Culture Emerging Church Hot Topics Bullying, Competition, Divorce, Drugs/Alcohol, Eating Disorders, Gossip, Grief, Homosexuality, Identity, Pressure, Relationships, Self Injury, Sexuality, Social Issues,

Stress, Suicide, Teen Parents, Tragedy Growing Up Church Work Careers, Life After Youth Group, Transitions, Vocation Pop Culture Books Teens Read, Celebrities, Current Events, Media, Movies, Music, Pop Culture Blog, Sports, Technology, Television, Year in Review Youth Culture In the World, Today’s Teens, Veritas: Truth from Youth

Do you have a passion for youth and youth culture? We want to build this section of the website and need contributors! If you would be interested in writing an article on an aspect of youth culture, or if you would be interested in starting a youth and pop culture video blog, send an email to youthESource@gmail.com!

Devotion: The Same Through the Ages

by Lisa Hellyer

looking so old.” The reminders that same through the ages, and that His everything changes just keep com- love for you is solid. ing. Our bodies change, our opinions Reflect: change, our lives change, our cul- • What changes around you tend to cause you the most angst? ture changes—everything changes.

It seems the rate of change contin- • How is the promise that Jesus is the same yesterday and today ues to accelerate, especially when and forever a source of encourit comes to technology. And so the agement for you? reminder from Hebrews 13:8 is such an encouragement, “Jesus Christ is Prayer: Jesus, You are our firm foundation, the same yesterday and today and our Rock, and our Mighty Fortress. forever.”

How incredible that promise is. Thank you for Your faithfulness! Help Jesus never changes! In a world us to cling to You when the changthat thrives on change, one thing es around us overwhelm. Remind remains—Jesus Christ is the light of us of Who You are—our Savior, our the world, the light no darkness can Lord, and our Friend. In Your name. overcome. He loves us uncondition- Amen. published online June 2014 ally. He sees us in all of our ugliness and shame. He knows our biggest Lisa Hellyer loves the Lord and has a fears, our greatest joys and our heart for connecting with His people. Lisa Text: Hebrews 13:8 You’ve heard the old joke: “How deepest dreams. Jesus sees us. He has been serving the church as a DCE for many Lutherans does it take to knows us. And He still loves us! Wow! 27 years. She currently serves the people of What a privilege it is to be His in- Lord of Life in Leawood, KS. Lisa is passionchange a light bulb?” “Change?!”

We don’t like it much. We like when strument. What a joy to carry His un- ate about coming alongside others as they things stay the same. We want some changing message to a lost and ev- seek to grow as Christ-like servant leaders. things in our lives to be reliable—nev- er-changing world. When you start When she isn’t working, Lisa loves to play er changing. But we are surrounded to feel like you can’t handle even golf, cheer for the Miami Dolphins and by a world that says, “Nothing stays one more change, open God’s spend time with her family, especially her the same.” “Change is inevitable.” Word to Hebrews 13 and take heart nieces and nephews.

“My, how you’ve grown.” “You’re in the promise that Jesus remains the thESource unplugged | 2014 | 25

& culture

Youth & Culture

& culture

youth

I’m Straight

by Jeffrey Meinz, DCE I can’t say that I’ve ever seen a the sin of homosexuality is no greater Hello. My name is Jeffrey Meinz.

I’m a Christian, a husband and a celebrity-clad magazine cover with than any other sin ever committed. father of five children. I’m a son, a the words, “I’m straight!” (There is, Romans 3:23 reminds us that, “…all brother, a nephew and a cousin. I however, a magazine called The have sinned a fall short of the glory was a camp director, a Director of Georgia Straight. The magazine of God.” For that reason alone the Christian Education and am now doesn’t have anything to do with church is an ideal place for a pera vicar. I’m a Los Angeles Dodgers sexuality but is about Vancouver, son who is struggling with homosexuality to belong. In fact, Jesus Christ and a Denver Broncos fan. I live in British Columbia, Canada.)

The question remains: What if you died for the sin of homosexuality Colorado…oh, one more thing… had a teenager approach you and and sends the Holy Spirit to help the …I’m straight. declare, “I’m gay.” Below are four Christian be healed from a sameThat sounded strange, didn’t it? sex attraction. Be reminded that JeWhen did it become so important steps to take: sus didn’t come to this world just so to define ourselves by our sexuality? 1.Embrace the person.

One reason the homosexual com- He could hang out with holy people.

Anderson Cooper publicly announced he was gay. Lance Bass munity is growing so rapidly is because Jesus came for the sinner, for the sick, did the same. Clay Aiken shocked they accept one another, they give for those in need of a Savior.

Consider Luke 5:29-32, “And Levi the world by declaring he was gay. each other a place to belong.

The truth is there is no better place made him a great feast in his house, Ellen Degeneres made TV history in 1997 when she accidentally an- for a person who is struggling with and there was a large company of nounced to Laura Dern over an air- their sexuality than the Church! The tax collectors and others reclining port intercom, “I’m gay.” Lady Gaga one, holy and apostolic church is full at table with them.And the Phariand Megan Fox have declared that of people infected with original sin. sees and their scribes grumbled at they are bisexual. Comedian Andy More importantly, the church is full his disciples, saying,’Why do you eat Dick and personal trainer power- of people who are forgiven and re- and drink with tax collectors and house Jillian Michaels admit they deemed by the death and resurrec- sinners?’And Jesus answered them, ’Those who are well have no need of prefer to simply fall in love, that gen- tion of Jesus Christ.

The teen needs to be assured that a physician, but those who are sick.I der doesn’t matter.

26| www.youthESource.com

& culture

thESource unplugged | 2014 | 27

youth

have not come to call the righteous already read them. That is why they first and foremost, define him or herare struggling. They know the Bible self by what Jesus Christ has done but sinners to repentance.’”

When we welcome a teen who is says homosexuality is a sin yet they still for them on the cross, in the tomb struggling with their sin into our midst wrestle with their feelings of attraction and at the waters of Baptism. Obviwe have the mission and ministry to toward the same sex. Nevertheless, ously, the more a teen can identify with Jesus Christ the less they will be gently encourage correction from diving into Scripture is ideal!

“All Scripture is breathed out by defined by their sexuality. sin and toward the Spirit. We remind them that the life of a Christian is God and profitable for teaching, for 4.Invite the parents and pastor into one of repentance, whether their reproof, for correction, and for train- the conversation.

This is foundational. The parents struggle is with same-sex attraction, ing in righteousness, that the man of gossip, greed, pride or anything else. God may be competent, equipped and pastor have to be a part of And we remind them that the life of for every good work”(2 Timothy 3: 16 this conversation. I understand that there are thousands of reasons why a Christian is one of grace and of liv- & 17 ESV).

You have to point the student to the teen would prefer to not talk to ing the new life that Jesus gives with the forgiveness of sins. The struggle Jesus while you point them to the the parents or pastor: they wouldn’t and temptation may remain, but Bible! Jesus and the Word cannot understand, the teen assumes they’ll none of us are alone in the fight. The be separated; they always go hand be kicked out of the house or the Holy Spirit fights with us, and we also in hand (John 1:1)! We know that church, the teenager isn’t ready to the proper use of the Law leads to come out yet, etc. Never provide have each other.

If you aren’t the pastor of your a repentant heart, which leads to an opportunity for yourself and a congregation, invite him into the the sweet message of the Gospel. teen to share a secret that doesn’t conversation (with the teen’s per- While studying the Bible and God’s involve the parents or the pastor. At mission, of course). Remind the teen clear stance on homosexuality as- the same time, you should never be that the pastor isn’t there to judge sure the teen with 100% certainty the one to let the cat out of the bag. or condemn, but there to listen, offer that they are loved by Jesus and You can encourage the teen to assurance and abundant forgive- that the Church is there for them as talk to their parents and pastor. You ness in combination of genuine re- they wrestle with their sexuality. Point can set up a meeting in your office pentance. Scripture offers an abun- them to their Baptism, their relation- where the teen can tell their parents dance of counsel on the matter of ship with Jesus Christ and His resur- and the pastor. You can ask if you teaching and correcting. Here is rection from the grave. Then, com- and the pastor can come over and forted with the fact that Jesus loves spend some time with the family in one example: “And the Lord’s servant must not them to death (quite literally), dive the privacy of their own home. Agree be quarrelsome but kind to every- into the Bible and seek God’s truth on a date with the teen that they will one, able to teach, patiently endur- about homosexuality. Repeatedly communicate with their parents.

It’s highly possible that the parents ing evil, correcting his opponents circle back to God’s love for them! with gentleness. God may perhaps 3.Encourage the student to not be will be upset, maybe even angry. grant them repentance leading to defined by their sexuality but rath- Now you’ve got another ministry a knowledge of the truth, and they er by their relationship with Jesus opportunity ahead of you: to walk with the parents while they wrestle may come to their senses and es- Christ.

Seek out ways to constantly re- with their teen’s sexual tensions. This cape from the snare of the devil, after being captured by him to do his mind the student that they are de- is tough work! It will not be easy! Be fined by their relationship with and in prepared to refer a Christian family will” (2 Timothy 2:24-26 ESV).

Jesus Christ, not by their sin. One sim- counselor if the matter goes beyond 2.Point the teen to Jesus.

The Word of God is true. It always ple activity would be to start each your or your pastor’s ability.

My name is Jeffrey Meinz. Jesus was, always is, always will be. Since meeting with a list. Ask the student to the Bible is a book written by a per- make a list of the things that define Christ loves me beyond anyone’s fect God we can conclude that the them (like the list I used to begin this understanding. Jesus died on a Word of God is 100% perfect. Believ- article). Where did the term “Chris- cross for me. He rose from the grave ing this can only cause a reader to tian” fall? Was “gay” higher or lower for me. He’s coming back some day surmise that homosexuality is a sin. In than “baptized”? Ask the student to take me home. I’m going to live fact, the Bible never speaks about what they mean by “gay” being with Him for eternity. Yet while I live homosexuality as something positive. part of their identity. Is it something on this earth…I’m a sinner. Praise If you ever find yourself in the sanc- they are still struggling with and want be to God that Jesus loves me too tuary talking to a teen about their sex- to change? Is it something they see much to leave me that way. I am no uality your first response might be to as somehow God’s will or doing? Or longer defined by my sin, but by my grab the closest Bible and start point- do they feel that indulging it, rather Savior. God grant me His Holy Spirit, ing out all of the verses that declare than fighting it, is somehow compat- so to believe, and so to live, in rehomosexuality a sin. The truth is they ible with being “baptized”? Begin pentance and in faith. published online March 2014 probably already know them. They’ve the journey of inviting the teen to,

& culture

youth

Marijuana & Faithful Choices

by AJ Mastic, DCE

Following Jesus means that every use. As a church, we decided that day we have to make choices. We we should address it, but how? We have to decide what actions in life could have just told people not to are an expression of the faith that smoke pot. However, we decided the Holy Spirit has created in us– to use it as a teaching opportunity. and which are not. As youth leaders, We came up with three questions part of our job is equipping Chris- that people could ask themselves in tian young people to make faithful order to guide them to a faithful dechoices. We must do more than tell cision on whether or not to use recthem what’s right and what’s wrong; reational marijuana. An action must we must equip them to evaluate life pass all three questions to be perchoices faithfully. We should also be missible. Below, you’ll see how we prepared to comfort them with the applied the three questions to recreGospel whenever God’s Word pro- ational marijuana use. I encourage you to think about teaching these duces repentance for past sins.

There are two big benefits to this three questions to your youth, in orapproach. First, you can never der to help them process through teach on every subject–so at some not just recreational marijuana use, point your youth will encounter a but a whole range of issues. dilemma that they’re not prepared 1. Is it prohibited by God’s Word? a. God’s Word does not directly for, if they aren’t equipped to think it through. Second, people are much address marijuana use. However, more willing to own an idea if they since getting high is in some ways arrive at it themselves. Consider similar to being drunk, we can look how Nathan approached David in at how the Bible treats alcohol. It fre2 Samuel 12. He could have busted quently tells us that drunkenness is a into the room and told David that sin (Ephesians 5:18) and harmful to he’s an adulterer. If he had done so, us. We are to be self-controlled (Titus David might have been very defen- 2:6) and sober-minded (1 Peter 5:8). sive. Instead, he helped David rec- Getting drunk or getting high would ognize his own guilt before deliver- go against that. b. However, could marijuana be ing God’s Word of Law. I live in Colorado, a state that used in small amounts, just as alconow allows recreational marijuana hol is not prohibited in moderation?

28| www.youthESource.com

Good question. While this might work out in theory, the practical answer is no.While the amount of alcohol consumed from a beverage can be regulated, it is almost impossible to control the amount of THC consumed from using marijuana, unless you’re going to get very scientific about it. So, if you use it, you’re almost certainly going to get high.

2. Is it prohibited by law (Romans 13:1)? a. Yes. Colorado and Washington have legalized recreational use of the drug, but it remains illegal under federal law as a Schedule I substance according to the Controlled Substances Act. While you’re not likely to get in trouble for it if you live in CO or WA and abide by state laws, using marijuana is still illegal in the United States.

3. Is it beneficial (1 Corinthians 6:12)? a. There’s a myth that smoking marijuana isn’t harmful, so I want to lay down some facts. If you check out the government’s site on drug abuse (http://www.drugabuse.gov/ publications/drugfacts/marijuana), you’ll find that marijuana is potentially addictive and impairs your judgment while under the influence.

Nothing new there. However, you may not know that it can also permanently lower your IQ by 8 points.

It’s also associated with lower life satisfaction, poor health and less career success. Snap. In addition, it’s a waste of money and your use of the drug may tempt others around you to sin. If you make a “Pros and Cons” chart in your head, there’s a lot on the Con side and pretty much just “It’s fun” on the Pro side.

So there you go. Using recreational marijuana failed all three questions. Plus, we didn’t force it on people–we equipped them to make the decision faithfully, according to Biblical principles. We took this approach not because we were afraid to speak truth, but because there’s value in equipping Christians to apply Biblical theology to everyday life.

With recreational marijuana, the case against using it is so clear-cut that a person would have to propose an extremely creative justifica-

& culture

the need to teach people to keep coming back to it (I even forgot to include it in my initial draft of this article), so stay focused on it.

I hope you’ll consider teaching these questions, or something similar, to your youth. If you keep bringing out these questions when dealing with tough issues, you’ll create a culture in which Christian youth go to God’s Word for faithful guidance and forgiveness. published online March 2014 AJ attended Concordia University Texas and served as a DCE for 5 years before becoming an SMP Pastor at St. John’s Lutheran Church in Denver, Colo. AJ is married to Megan and they have a beautiful two-year-old daughter named Sarah.

Veritas: Looking for Answers

by Carolyn Starkey youthESource asked a couple teens, “What questions do you have about your faith, or about God? What questions are your friends asking? Where do you go for the answers? How could your church help?” Here’s what one of them had to say: Something that I think is underestimated is how very hard it is to raise your hand in youth group.

I was firmly raised in the age of Google, and I know that the an-

youth

tion or simply be apathetic in order to arrive at the conclusion that it’s okay. In that event, speaking some truth in love to that person would be in order.

If your youth get in the habit of using these questions, I guarantee that at some point they will discover that they have been sinning. This sudden realization can bring on a whole wave of guilt. Because of this reality, I encourage you to teach a fourth question (from Romans 10:9); “Do I believe that ‘Jesus is Lord and that God raised Him from the Dead?’

Then God’s forgiveness is for me!”

We must be intentional about teaching youth to hear, speak and live in the Gospel–which frees us from our sin! The Gospel is so fundamental to our faith that it’s easy for us to forget

swers I can find about my religion on there are far from definitive. But it’s so much easier to ask the internet than it is to ask someone who actually knows me. It’s so much easier to sift through information I know better than to trust than to look my youth leaders in the eye and say, “Hey, my friends think we hate them, and to be honest I don’t blame them because historically we really haven’t been the best to the LGBTQIA+ community.”

It’s not just the eye contact that makes it hard. There’s the added worry about the other teenagers in the group. Even if they’re the nicest group of people in the world, the most understanding youth leaders you’ve ever met, you wonder if they’re going to laugh at you. If you’ll hear someone whisper something to one of their friends. If they’re going to think that you’re less of a Christian for having questions about what kind of bearing the Old Testament has on you following Jesus’ teachings.

The simple truth of it is that some of our questions won’t be asked anywhere but the internet. On the off chance they are, our friends usually won’t have the answers, either.

I find myself wishing, at times, for a website with unbiased, biblically supported answers from leaders that I can trust. Be it a forum or an ask.fm page, the option to find your answer as anonymously as you can on other corners of the internet is a piece of available technology that I wish more youth groups would make an effort to embrace. published online July 2014 Carolyn Starkey is a fifteen year old student who lives in Arkansas and spends slightly too much time on the internet. Her poem Sea Legs was published in the November 2013 print edition of Teen Ink.

thESource unplugged | 2014 | 29

LCMS Youth Ministry Helping young people grow in the faith

Resources and Services:

• Lutheran Youth Fellowship Teen Leadership Initiative • LCMS Servant Events, ongoing volunteer opportunities for youth • National LCMS Youth Gathering • Lutheran Youth Corps • LCMS Young Adult Ministry • LCMS U, a campus-ministry network • thESource, a website that provides Jesus-centered resources for those at work with youth

www.lcms.org/youth

@

Youth.Ministry@lcms.org

f LCMSYouthMinistry T @lcmsyouth