Awang Ismail bin Awang Hambali Abdul Rani Haji Adenan
* Read our online version to access the hyperlinks to other reference articles made by the author.
04 09 ARE YOU READY TO BE THE LEADER OF YOUR CAREER?
10 INCREDIBLE FACTS ABOUT THE HARRY POTTER STORY AND J.K. ROWLING'S MAGICAL JOURNEY TO SUCCESS 11 THE POWER OF MENTAL REHEARSAL: A LESSON IN VISUALISATION FROM THE EDGE OF THE SOUND BARRIER THE POWER OF AUTHENTIC ALIGNMENT IN YOUR
FINDING
LET US KNOW
WHY YOU NEED TO ADD CONSENSUS DECISION MAKING TO YOUR APPROACH
BOOK REVIEW: CULTURE IS THE WAY: MATT MAYBERRY
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From the
Editorial Desk
COUNTING DOWN TO HUMILITY
It is hard to trace the origins of the countdown idea. Countdowns always start with bigger numbers and work downward Besides setting a date, the countdown towards any event usually requires a set of preparatory steps. There are moments in life when counting down can redirect our thoughts and emotions.
Even our lives and leadership journeys are a series of countdowns, whether counting down to the last days of school before festive holidays, the number of days until you get your driver’s license, or the number of days before your university graduation.
Our countdowns don't stop with these early milestones. They continue with the anticipation of the wedding day, the birth of our children, and not forgetting the pressure of meeting a report deadline. These countdowns are a constant in our lives.
Yet, we must also remember that many people don’t have the luxury of planning countdowns in such a precise way, and life events often come up abruptly because of failing health, family issues, or job concerns—or they may not be in a financial position to retire at all.
For those of us who are privileged, we have the opportunity to plan and prepare for countdowns. We should use this time and space wisely to set our goals and aspirations on the right path.
In a world of busyness, distraction, and noise, it’s hard to be still. A world in which what is NEXT can dominate our minds more than what’s going on NOW, and because of that, many find being present is one of the hardest things to master as a human being, to genuinely and authentically be in that moment.
“It Is Not the Years In Your Life; It Is The Life In Your Years. Make Your Leadership Count.”
- Abraham Lincoln
The Power of Authentic Alignment in Your Life
BY GREGG VANOUREK
The Problem of Lacking Authentic Alignment in Your Life
Are you being true to yourself? Is there a good fit between how you live and who you really are? In other words, do you have authentic alignment in your life?
If you’re living in authentic alignment (1), there’s a good match between your inner world of your thoughts, hopes, and dreams and the outer world of what you’re doing with your life. There’s coherence between your core values, beliefs, priorities, and actions. With authentic alignment, you’re more likely to have not only physical but also mental, emotional, and even spiritual health and wellness.
There’s great power in the integrity of what author Kevin Cashman calls “total congruence” between who you are and what you do. As well as in the wholeness of what educator and author Parker Palmer calls “an undivided life.”
"A happy life is one which is in accordance with its own nature. - Lucius Annaeus Seneca, ancient Roman Stoic philosopher"
There are many instances in which we can see the problem with misalignment. If your car tires are out of alignment, for example, you can have poor handling, uneven tire wear, reduced fuel efficiency, and suspension problems. What happens when the players on a team are all over the place instead of acting as a disciplined unit? How will it go if a married couple isn’t on the same page about children and finances? What happens to organisations when they’re not aligned?
There’s also a cost to lacking authentic alignment in your life. When it’s missing, you tend to:
» spend a lot of time doing things you don’t really want to do
» feel inauthentic, like a fraud
» fall into the trap of people-pleasing
» feel stuck in your life or work
» feel sad or disappointed that you’ve given up on yourself or your dreams
» risk forgetting who you truly are because you’ve been pretending to be something you’re not for so long
» be disconnected or cut off from yourself, making you feel off kilter
» suspect that you’re going through the motions of life
» be anxious, frustrated, or overwhelmed more often
» feel lethargic or exhausted
Source: Image is from freepik.com by @jigsawstocker
What’s more, misalignment undermines your ability to do good work and perform at your highest levels.
"…there can be no greater suffering than living a lifelong lie…. in the end what will matter most is knowing that we stayed true to ourselves.
-Parker Palmer, educator and writer"
Why We Do It
Lacking authentic alignment is common. But why? There are many factors that can disrupt the rhythm of marching to the beat of your own drummer, as the expression goes. For example, you may drift away from your core because you:
» don’t know who you are (or have forgotten it)
» feel a need to please others or feel beholden to other people’s expectations
» take too many things on because you’re overambitious about what you can do
» feel trapped in commitments you’ve made in the past
» have become a prisoner of success, perhaps due to an excessive need for recognition
Sometimes, an external shock can create misalignment. It can be moving to a new community, losing a job, having a health crisis, or losing a loved one.
Benefits of Authentic Alignment
When you’re playing your own tune in life, it can bring you many benefits, including:
» a sense of wellness, including inner peace and harmony
» more freedom
» more balance in your life
» a sense of gratitude
» more joy
» a sense of fulfillment
When you have authentic alignment, you’re more likely to feel content and secure. You’re better able to move on and let go of things that aren’t good for you. And you’re able to tap into your inner voice and intuition.
With authentic alignment, you’re also better at setting boundaries and bolder in doing the things you really want to do. You’re likely to develop and maintain better relationships because you’re no longer hiding yourself. People will get to know the real you as you show up in the world with more honesty and vulnerability, in turn fostering connection and intimacy. You’ll tend to attract people who are a better fit for you in things like friendships or romantic relationships.
When you have authentic alignment, you don’t fret about wasting time because you’re intentionally engaging in good things in your life. This can help you move from a vexing sense of doubt about whether you’re living well to a sense of clarity, satisfaction, and serenity.
Living in authentic alignment can bring you a sense of profound satisfaction, with no need to keep chasing things because you already feel whole. Finally, it can help you avoid the common regret of living your life according to other people’s expectations instead of a life true to yourself.
"Of all of the regrets and lessons shared with me as I sat beside their beds, the regret of not having lived a life true to themselves was the most common of all. It was also the one that caused the most frustration” (since their realisation came too late)… It is a pity that being who we truly are requires so much courage, but it does. It takes enormous courage at times. -Bronnie Ware, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying."
How to Create and Maintain Authentic Alignment How to go about creating more authentic alignment in your life? Here are 14 approaches:
1. Develop your self-awareness. Know yourself so well and deeply that you feel a sense of clarity and comfort about who you are and what makes you tick, helping you feel more comfortable in your own skin.
2. Strip away your ego, pride, and ambition. Set aside the expectations of others. Tap into your heart instead of your ego.
3. Remove your mask in front of those you love the most, deepening connection. Stop pretending to be something you’re not. Let them see the real you and invite them to reciprocate.
4. Explore the root causes that led you to want to avoid being yourself. Perhaps it was outside expectations? Or fear of judgment or failure? Fear of rejection, or of being hurt? Afraid to be seen for who you truly are? Sometimes, your life may be overly full, cluttered with too many commitments and too much “busyness.”
5. Return to your center by finding or creating sanctuary in your life. Sanctuary is a place or practice of peace in which you can leave the distractions, interruptions, and chaos behind and be present in silent, deep reflection. It could be a quiet room at home, a place of worship, or a quiet and solitary spot in nature.
6. Notice when you’re becoming misaligned. Pay attention to how you’re feeling. Is it frustration? Shame? Something else? Tune into your body and your emotions. Also, pay attention to the situations where it’s common: what are you doing and who are you with? See if there are patterns.
7. Practice disciplined self-care regularly. It’s easy to become misaligned when you’re tired, overworked, or burned out. Maintain healthy habits and rituals so you don’t fall into traps that get you out of alignment.
8. Discover your core values. Your values are what you consider most important in life, what’s most worthy and valuable to you. Are you living in accordance with your values?
9. Discover your strengths. What are the things you’re good at and that make you feel powerful when you’re engaging in them? Make sure that you’re using them often.
10. Discover your passions. What are the things that consume you with palpable emotion over time? How can you integrate them into your days more often?
11. Discover your purpose Think about why you’re here and what feels purposeful and meaningful to you. Are you living purposefully? This can be a tough one for people. Author Richard Leider points out that there are two types of purpose. First, is a “BIG P” Purpose (a noble cause or something you can dedicate your life to). But you can also have a “little p” purpose (daily choices of how to contribute to others). Leider notes that “little p” actions are just as worthy. Also, they can add up over time into something potent.
12. Craft a vision of the good life. Think about how you want to live. What’s a bold and vivid picture of that? Make sure you’re working toward living it.
13. Be vigilant in declining activities that aren’t a good fit while agreeing to ones that are in alignment. When opportunities and requests come your way, do you have a good way to screen them? Without some sort of criteria or filter, you can end up with days filled with things are far afield from what you want to do.
14. Pay attention to when you need to interrupt the pattern and make a more radical shift. In a Harvard Business Review article, Donald Sull and Dominic Houlder point out that you may need to break the cycle with a catalyst like a course or sabbatical so you can spot unhealthy patterns and give yourself time to make needed changes.
Conclusion
Though authentic alignment may sound straightforward, it’s common for people to drift out of alignment.
It’s essential to be honest with yourself. If you can’t admit to yourself that you’re out of alignment, you’re unlikely to get it back. It won’t help if you’re too hard on yourself when you drift. A little self-compassion can go a long way. Misalignment is common. If you find yourself judging yourself harshly and engaging in negative self-talk, change the channel and flip toward ideas for how to bring alignment back into your life.
It’s also important to have your own back. Go to bat for yourself just as you would your best friend. Finally, recall that authentic alignment is an ongoing process. Expect to have ups and downs. That’s okay, as long as you work to bring it back when you drift.
Wishing you well with it, and please reach out if you think I can help.
- Gregg
Postscript: Inspirations on Authentic Alignment
» “To thine own self be true.” -William Shakespeare, English poet, playwright, and actor
» “To be nobody-but-yourself—in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else—means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.” -e.e. cummings, poet, painter, and playwright
» “I know who I am. The more we try to be something we’re not, the less successful we’ll be…. I don’t care what I do as long as I adhere to certain values.” -Jael Kampfe, from our LIFE Entrepreneurs interview
» “Some time when the river is ice ask me mistakes I have made. Ask me whether what I have done is my life.” -William Stafford, from his poem, “Ask Me”
» “I think I’ve always had a strong sense of who I am, but allowing myself to be that person is more recent.” -Bridget Bradley Gray, from our LIFE Entrepreneurs interview
» “Being true to who you really are can be one of the hardest things to do in life.” -Carlii Lyon, Australian executive
» “Even if all these needs are satisfied, we may still often (if not always) expect that a new discontent and restlessness will soon develop, unless the individual is doing what he is fitted for. A musician must make music, an artist must paint, a poet must write, if he is to be ultimately happy. What a man can be, he must This need we may call self-actualisation.” -Abraham Maslow, psychologist
» “The thing that is really hard, and really amazing, is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself.” -Anna Quindlen, writer
» “…the secret of career satisfaction lies in doing what you enjoy most. A few lucky people discover this secret early in life, but most of us are caught in a kind of psychological wrestling match, torn between what we think we can do, what we (or others) feel we ought to do, and what we think we want to do. Our advice? Concentrate instead on who you are, and the rest will fall into place.” -Paul D. Tieger, Barbara Barron, and Kelly Tieger, Do What You Are
» “I can’t think of a sadder way to die than with the knowledge that I never showed up in this world as who I really am. I can’t think of a more graced way to die than with the knowledge that I showed up here as my true self, the best I knew how, able to engage life freely and lovingly because I had become fierce with reality.” -Parker Palmer, On the Brink of Everything
» “The ultimate goal in life is not to be successful or loved, but to become the truest expression of ourselves, to live into authentic selfhood, to honor our birthright gifts and callings, and be of service to humanity and our world… life is seen as a journey of personal and collective unfolding toward our true nature.” -Frederic Laloux in Reinventing Organizations
» “Afraid that our inner light will be extinguished or our inner darkness exposed, we hide our true identities from each other. In the process, we become separated from our own souls. We end up living divided lives, so far removed from the truth we hold within that we cannot know the integrity that comes from being what you are.” -Parker Palmer, A Hidden Wholeness
» “Trying to live someone else’s life, or to live by an abstract norm, will invariably fail—and may even do great damage.” -Parker Palmer, Let Your Life Speak
» “If you are experiencing unease or demotivation in your life, it is probably because you are not living according to your values.” -Andrew Bryant and Ana Kazan, Self-Leadership
» “Before I can tell my life what I want to do with it, I must listen to my life telling me who I am. I must listen for the truths and values at the heart of my own identity, not the standards by which I must live—but the standards by which I cannot help but live if I am living my own life.” -Parker Palmer, Let Your Life Speak
» “That’s who I am at my core, what I love. I mean, if a young person calls me and says, ‘Hey, can you help me? Can you listen to me?’ I can’t say no to that. It’s almost physically impossible for me to say no.” -Gerald Chertavian, from our LIFE Entrepreneurs interview
» “One dwells with God by being faithful to one’s nature. One crosses God by trying to be something one is not.” -Parker Palmer, Let Your Life Speak
» “I was dying inside. I was so possessed by trying to make you love me for my achievements that I was actually creating this identity that was disconnected from myself. I wanted people to love me for the hologram I created of myself.” -Chip Conley, author and entrepreneur, from our LIFE Entrepreneurs interview
Appendix: Related Concepts
There are several concepts related to authentic alignment that can help us understand it better.
Authenticity. When you’re authentic, it means you’re genuine, real, and true. Researcher and author Brene Brown defines authenticity as “the daily practice of letting go of who we think we’re supposed to be and embracing who we are.” Other researchers describe it as “the degree to which a particular behavior is congruent with a person’s attitudes, beliefs, values, motives, and other dispositions.” (Source: Jongman-Sereno, K. P., & Leary, M. R. (2019). The enigma of being yourself: A critical examination of the concept of authenticity. Review of General Psychology, 23(1), 133–142.)
Authentic Integrity. In our book, LIFE Entrepreneurs: Ordinary People Creating Extraordinary Lives, Christopher Gergen and I noted the importance of “authentic integrity”: “integration of all aspects of our lives in a way that coheres with our true nature.” It means living in alignment with our “core identity,” including our purpose, values, strengths, and aspirations.
"I just felt like I’ve lived a life that was true to itself…. Anybody who’s ever hung out in an ‘old man bar’—you know what I’m talking about—sees what happens when you don’t let that part of yourself do its thing. - Mary Cutrufello, musician and songwriter, in our LIFE Entrepreneurs interview"
Self-concordance. Originally, researchers thought of selfconcordance as being in touch with your deeper self. More recently, researchers are conceptualizing it as congruence between your implicit motives (unconscious, automatic drives) and explicit motives (conscious drives like personal goals). When you’re self-concordant, you tend to choose goals that are more personally productive and fulfilling. It enhances your ability to grow, achieve your goals, and feel happy. Researchers measure self-concordance via the relative autonomy index, with a continuum ranging from external to internal motivation. (Source: Kennon M. Sheldon and Erica A. Holberg, “Chapter Four—Using free will wisely: The importance of self-concordant goal pursuit,” Advances in Motivation Science, Vol. 10, 2023.)
Self-congruence. When you have self-congruence, you tend to behave consistently with who you really are and what you’re really like, according to researchers. This can include things like your “true self” or your attitudes, beliefs, and values.
True North. Authors Bill George and Peter Sims define your true north as “the internal compass that guides you successfully through life. It represents who you are as a human being at your deepest level. It is your orienting point.” Critiques. Not surprisingly, there are also critiques of concepts like “authenticity” and “true self” in the research literature. For example, in their article, “The Enigma of Being Yourself,” Katrina P. Jongman-Sereno and Mark R. Leary write: “the human personality invariably contains myriad personality dispositions, emotional tendencies, values, attitudes, beliefs, and motives that are often contradictory and incompatible even though they are genuine aspects of the person’s psychological make-up…. People are genuinely multifaceted."
“Very well then I contradict myself, (I am large, I contain multitudes.)” -Walt Whitman, poet
Do we truly understand ourselves, including our behaviors, and the reasons behind them? Are our self-perceptions biased, incomplete, selective, or even inaccurate, as some researchers suggest? Additionally, how much does nonconscious mental functioning drive our behavior?
Researchers have noted that there’s ambiguity and variability in the definitions of terms like “authenticity,” not to mention cultural differences. They also warn against having an idealized version of the self, because it’s unattainable, leading to potential feelings of inadequacy or failure. For some, the pressure to “be authentic” can result in significant anxiety and stress.
Jongman-Sereno and Leary also note that our ability to adapt our behavior to suit different situations is generally beneficial for our psychological wellbeing and social relationships. We often find ourselves playing various roles at home and work, and that’s normal. (But there’s a significant difference between making small adjustments to ease interactions and wearing a mask to disguise who we really are.)
This article was originally published on Gregg Vanourek.
Gregg Vanourek
Gregg Vanourek is an executive, changemaker, and award-winning author who trains, teaches, and speaks on leadership, entrepreneurship, and life and work design. He runs Gregg Vanourek LLC, a training venture focused on leading self, leading others, and leading change. Gregg is co-author of three books, including Triple Crown Leadership (a winner of the International Book Awards) and LIFE Entrepreneurs (a manifesto for integrating our life and work with purpose and passion).
Are You Ready to be the Leader of Your Career?
BY MICHELLE GIBBINGS
Source: image by storyset from freepik
Earlier this year, Roger Federer spoke at Dartmouth College in New Hampshire (USA). He asked the audience a question.
"In the 1,526 singles matches I played in my career, I won almost 80 per cent of those matches…What percentage of the points do you think I won in those matches?"
The answer was 54 per cent. "In other words, even top-ranked tennis players win barely more than half of the points they play… The truth is, whatever game you play in life, sometimes you're going to lose. A point, a match, a season, a job."
It's a reminder. We have good days and not-so-good days.
To become the leader of your career, you want to keep your feet firmly planted on the ground, keep an eye on the future and be ready to advance and adapt.
The world is changing, and so is how we work. To stay in the game, not even ahead of the game, it's important to get comfortable with career change and reinvention.
You don't want to be a passenger in your career with the future hurtling past you, nor do you want to be a backseat driver with no control or stuck on autopilot. You want to be the one who makes decisions about which direction to travel, how fast to go, any detours to take and the support crew you need to get you there.
You want to get in the driver's seat and be willing to make courageous decisions. Courage is being willing to do the work to change when needed.
To become the leader of your career, here are six tips to get you started.
Tip 1 – Be a Master Planner
Take time to actively plan your career by setting aside time to reflect on your current state, where you want to head, and your progress, and identify critical next steps.
This includes elevating your awareness of what is happening around you in terms of how your role, profession, industry, and sector are changing. Automation and artificial intelligence will impact the majority of the workforce, and you want to prepare for this.
Also, look at developments in other industries that may impact your field. This will help you widen your perspective about what's possible for your next career steps.
Consider:
» When did you last devote time to reviewing your career health?
» Are you abreast of changes to your industry and profession as a result of AI and other factors?
» Are you balancing your attention so you are learning from the past, being present in the moment and future-focused?
Tip 2 – Set Intentions
Dr Heidi Grant Halvorson, the Associate Director of the Motivation Science Center at Columbia Business School, talks about the importance of setting intentions. She suggests intentions are what help you progress, not goal setting.
When you focus on intentions, you are clear about what you are going to do in various situations. It works like this: If or when situation A happens, then I will perform behaviour B.
For example, you may say, "When I work back late at night, I will meditate before I go to bed." According to Heidi, research shows that you are more likely to follow through when you are clear about your chosen behaviour in a particular situation.
So, what are your intentions for your career and for your working day?
For example, write down what you want to achieve at the start of each day (or working week). Physically writing a goal, rather than just verbalising it, makes the intent harder to ignore. When intentions are spoken and committed to publicly, it provides additional impetus to complete the task.
Tip 3 – Articulate your USP
Everyone brings specific skills and ways of operating to their work. Think of this as your unique selling proposition (USP). It's the value you deliver through your work that makes you stand out from everyone else.
However, what employers value changes over time, so make sure your USP is meaningful, current and targeted.
As the author of Exponential Organisations, Salim Ismail said: "Today, if you're not disrupting yourself, someone else is; your fate is to be either the disrupter or the disrupted. There is no middle ground".
While his comment was about organisations, it is equally relevant to your career.
Consider:
» What's the value you bring to your work?
» Is that value current and relevant?
» Do you need to uplift that value?
» Can you clearly articulate that value as your USP?
Tip 4 – Get connected
Build a profile where you are known for something, are respected, and have a network of people willing to advocate for you.
Achieving this means spending time thinking about what you can do for others, rather than just focusing on what they can do for you. The more you proactively help others, the more they will want to help you. You are building your influential leadership skills as you do this.
Consider:
» How can you help a colleague or connection build their network? Is there someone in your network that you can connect them with?
» Have you got helpful knowledge or insight that you could share with someone?
» Can you help a colleague or friend with their career?
Tip 5 – Embark on Your Learning Adventure
Don't wait for the organisation you work for to develop you. Successful people know that learning is crucial to future career success and are constantly seeking out new ideas and ways to stretch themselves.
This includes taking the time to understand themselves and to develop their emotional intelligence, which, in many areas, is more important than technical skills as one progresses in one's career.
Consider:
» Buy a book on a topic you have always wanted to know about and differs from your day job.
» If you sit in an office all day, attend a course that requires you to use your hands to create something (e.g., woodwork, craft, or design).
» Go to a lecture or attend leadership training on a subject that will broaden your field of view.
» Subscribe to online news to get up-to-date information and knowledge from around the world.
» Invest in executive coaching so you can uncover your career aspirations and motivations.
» Invest in leadership development and learning more about yourself, your emotional intelligence and your emotional triggers.
» Be eager to receive feedback from others, including sponsors, mentors, colleagues, and peers. It's important to understand how people see us and how that differs from how we see ourselves.
Tip 6 – Get active
How you feel, mentally and physically, impacts your focus, productivity, decision-making capacity, and how you connect and engage with your work colleagues.
Also, today's work environment is stressful, and it's important to be able to regulate behaviour and manage stress.
Consider:
» Are you getting enough sleep?
» Are you eating well and exercising?
» Are you finding time to reflect?
» Are you setting aside time each day for you?
» Are you finding ways to recharge and maintain your energy levelyours?
Your career is an important part of your life, but it is only a part of it. This means it's important to plan and manage your career in the context of your 'whole-of-life' goals.
The legendary actress Mae West said, "You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough."
Michelle Gibbings
Michelle Gibbings is a workplace expert and the award-winning author of three books. Her latest book is 'Bad Boss: What to do if you work for one, manage one or are one'. www.michellegibbings.com.
The Power of Mental Rehearsal: A Lesson in Visualisation from the Edge of the Sound Barrier
BY JULIET FUNT
Have you ever noticed how the most accomplished performers in any field seem to move through their biggest moments with an almost supernatural confidence? As if they've been there before? Here's the thing—they have. In their minds.
The Edge of Wonder
This weekend, we enjoyed some family time at the Atlanta Air Show to celebrate my firstborn son Jake's 19th birthday.
Despite the 45-minute line for chicken nuggets and the mind-numbing heat, it was a magnificent day. We especially enjoyed watching the Thunderbirds, the United States Air Force's elite demonstration team. Having the privilege of working with the Air Force through our work at JFG (Juliet Funt Group), I have an even deeper appreciation for these remarkable pilots, who execute maneuvers as low as 100 feet off the ground at speeds exceeding 700 mph. The jets dance in spectacular unison and sound like they’re tearing the sky. The vibration reaches right down into your gut and moves through you. If you’ve never experienced it, jot it on your bucket list.
Still buzzing with excitement after the show and feeling inspired by the day’s display, we spent the evening watching The Blue Angels over sushi. The 2024 documentary by Prime Video & Amazon MGM Studios captures the brilliance of the US Navy’s demonstration team, but one scene, in particular, left me floored (to the point where I replayed it so many times that my family was ready to ban me from the remote).
Source: image from rawpixel.com on freepik
Chair Flying
If you’re not familiar with what the incredible aeronautic acrobats in demonstration teams do, the Thunderbirds (U.S. Air Force) and the Blue Angels (U.S. Navy) are specialised aviation squads that perform high-speed, precise aerial maneuvers in tightly synchronised formations to showcase the skill and discipline of their respective branches. During some maneuvers, they fly so close that there's only about 18 inches between their wingtip and the next aircraft.
When you're flying just under the speed of sound with only 18 inches between you and catastrophe, there's no room for uncertainty. The stakes couldn't be higher, and neither could the level of preparation. While most of us won't find ourselves in a fighter jet formation, we all face moments where the margin for error feels frighteningly slim—whether it's a make-orbreak presentation, a crucial conversation with a loved one, or a decision that could alter our career path. That's where "chair flying" comes in.
The scene that captivated me showed the Blue Angels pilots sitting together, still, eyes closed, while their leaders verbally guided them through an imagined flight.
The precision and unity with which these pilots could place themselves in this imagined reality was extraordinary. Whether executing their signature six-plane delta formation or performing combat maneuvers in their F/A-18 Super Hornets, they practice until the visualisation becomes as real as flight itself.
'Chair flying' has long been a cornerstone of preparation for demonstration teams. In the video below, you'll see another team's take on this mental rehearsal practice. They alternate between active rehearsal, using pens to trace their flight paths, and moments of completely still visualisation—eyes closed and minds soaring.
The Power of Seeing the Future
This practice immediately resonated with me because I've been doing my own version of "chair flying" for 15 years.
Before every keynote speech or difficult executive pitch, I visualise the experience in detail—right down to choosing my outfit in advance and requesting venue photos to make my mental rehearsal as accurate as possible. It's a practice that has enormously supported my performance on stage and beyond.
The “mental rehearsal” tool is something that’s long been used by some of the most triumphant and inspiring individuals. Consider this remarkable story about Olympic champion Michael Phelps and his coach Bob Bowman.
What Phelps and the Blue Angels understand—what I've experienced firsthand—is that our brains are remarkably sophisticated simulation machines.
Studies show that when we vividly imagine an experience, our neural pathways fire in patterns similar to actually performing the action. It’s been proven to improve performance outcomes by up to 23%, enhance decision-making confidence, and even increase physical strength through neural pathway activation.
"Chair flying" isn’t just for fighter pilots or public speakers—it’s a technique adaptable to nearly any area of life. For athletes, it means mentally rehearsing the movements that lead to peak performance; for professionals, it’s running through the nuances of a high-stakes meeting or presentation; for parents, it could be visualising a calm response in a challenging moment with a child. Visualisation lets you mentally walk through various scenarios, refining your responses and intentions so that when the real moment arrives, you’re grounded, confident, and ready.
Glide Toward Your Goals
You don't need hours for this practice. Even a moment or two of focused mental rehearsal can make a difference. Try it before your next important meeting, interview, first date, or difficult conversation. Picture yourself handling the situation with grace and confidence. If you can't "see" it, describe it to yourself in words or focus on the physical sensations of confidence and competence.
Try a little chair flying of your own. Close your eyes, or keep them open if you prefer, and walk through every step of what's ahead. Your mind will begin laying down the neural pathways to success, just like those Blue Angel pilots practicing their precision maneuvers long before they take to the sky.
I'd love to hear about how this practice impacts your next important moment, or how it has worked for you across your career. After all, the best performers in any field don't just chance it—they see their success before they live it.
Juliet Funt
Juliet Funt is the founder and CEO at JFG (Juliet Funt Group), which is a consulting and training firm built upon the popular teaching of CEO Juliet Funt, author of A Minute to Think.
The Paradox of Stress: Finding Your Balance for Optimal Outcomes
BY MICHELLE GIBBINGS
How to Harness the Power of Stress for Peak Performance and Well-Being
When you reflect on your most recent working week, what part did stress play? Did it help or hinder your performance and progress?
Stress is often seen as the enemy of well-being, productivity, and creativity. It’s associated with burnout, disengagement, and feelings of overwhelm.
Yet, research suggests that not all stress is harmful. Indeed, stress can be good for us under the right conditions and when managed correctly. It can motivate, be a catalyst for growth, and a factor that contributes to your success.
For example, I’ve learned that if I am too relaxed before a public speaking event, then I should worry. Why? Because it means I am not invested enough in the outcome. Stress in those moments motivates and inspires me to do my best.
So, the challenge for leaders is not to eliminate stress but to find the sweet spot where stress enhances performance and builds a positive work environment without overwhelming themselves, their team, or their colleagues.
The Paradox of Stress
We all experience stress at times; it’s a natural reaction.
Your brain detects what it sees as a threat, and your body’s natural defence mechanisms kick in – your heart rate elevates, and hormones like adrenaline and cortisol are released. These mechanisms are all designed to prepare you to confront that threat. In that context, stress is helping you be alert to the danger.
As Stanford University Professor Robert Sapolsky discusses in his brilliant book ‘Why Zebras Don’t Get Ulcers,’ the physiological changes that occur when you confront a threat can feel uncomfortable, but they can also enhance alertness and improve performance in situations requiring quick thinking and problem-solving.
The issue is how you respond, and that depends on the cause of the stress and your ability to respond.
Consequently, there are different types of stress. Researchers and psychologists distinguish between positive stress (‘eustress’) and negative stress (‘distress’).
Eustress is the type of stress that arises when you face challenges that push you beyond what feels comfortable, but still within your ability to manage. In this context, stress can improve focus and alertness, increase motivation, and elevate creativity.
In contrast, distress occurs when the demands placed on you exceed your ability to cope, leading to feelings of helplessness, despair, and even anxiety and burnout. In this context, stress can impair cognitive performance and lead to emotional exhaustion and physical health issues.
Find Your Goldilocks Zone
It’s all about balance.
The emerging perspective is that mild stress (i.e., manageable stress) can facilitate cognitive functions associated with memory, cognitive flexibility, or information processing.
However, chronic stress or stress that is beyond a person’s coping mechanism impairs. Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School Dr Kerry Ressler explains how chronic or persistent stress may rewire the brain over time. In this article, he describes how, with prolonged stress, there is less activity in the prefrontal cortex, which is associated with higher-level cognitive processing, and more activity in the amygdala, which is focused on survival.
So, with stress, it’s about finding the optimal level, what some people call the ‘Goldilocks zone’ where your stress level is ‘just right’.
Too little stress, and we get bored and apathetic. Too much stress, and it’s overwhelming. The zone of optimal performance is where our stress levels are at the right level to improve our performance. This is known as the Yerkes-Dodson Law. It’s based on the premise that performance improves with increasing levels of stress, but only up to a point. Beyond that point, performance deteriorates as stress becomes overwhelming.
Therefore, it’s crucial to focus on your ability to manage and regulate stress so you can maximise its positive impacts. For leaders, this means creating environments where stress is neither too scarce (which can lead to complacency) nor excessive (which can lead to burnout and anxiety).
Know the Warning Signs
You want to be alert to the warning signs because there is a fine line between productive and destructive stress.
Be alert to how your team feels and create open communication channels where they feel comfortable sharing their fears and feelings. Regularly check in with them and spend quality time with them.
Early recognition and helpful conversations allow for timely interventions. As a leader, this is you tapping into your emotional intelligence at work.
Cultivating the Optimal Environment
As a leader, your goal is not to eliminate stress but to create conditions in which stress can serve as a performance accelerator for yourself and your team.
Here are seven tips to apply.
Tip One – Set Challenging Yet Achievable Goals
Having goals can motivate people, but only when they feel achievable. You want the goal to be specific and clear. Remember the acronym SMART goals? They are particularly relevant in this context.
Tip Two – Promote a Growth Mindset
Challenges that stretch your team members’ capabilities, such as new projects, can serve as opportunities for growth, skill development, and achievement. Frame the tasks with a focus on opportunities to learn and emphasise the support you will provide.
To do this, you will want to foster a growth mindset in your team. When employees view challenges as chances to grow rather than threats to their competence and performance, they are more likely to embrace the opportunity.
Tip Three – Lead by Example
You will want to lead by example and role model healthy stress management techniques, such as practising self-care, setting boundaries, and seeking help when needed.
Also, by celebrating efforts, focusing on learning rather than just outcomes, and providing constructive feedback that encourages development, you are role-modelling your growth mindset.
Tip Four – Build the Structure
Flexible work schedules and remote work options can help your team better manage their stress by allowing them to balance work with personal responsibilities more effectively.
Build in reflection and check-in practices. That way, you regularly check in with your team members, and you know what’s going on. Take the time to celebrate both small and large wins. You want to celebrate progress because that motivates people (as I’ve written about before).
Tip Five – Foster Autonomy
One key factor distinguishing eustress from distress is a sense of control.
When people feel like they have more control over what they do and how they do it, stress is less likely to feel overwhelming.
Consider how you can frame your team’s work and where there are opportunities for autonomy. You can get your team members to set their own priorities, expand their decision-making authority, and give them greater freedom in how they work.
Tip Six – Provide Resources and Support
Offer resources such as coaching, stress management workshops, access to mental health professionals, and employee assistance programs.
One of the most effective support mechanisms is connection. My article on ‘Why You Need to Focus on Belonging at Work’ is helpful.
Tip Seven – Encourage Rest and Recovery
You will want to ensure that your team take regular breaks and have time to rest and recover.
Once again, this is where your role modelling matters. If you work long hours, never take a break, and are always ‘on’, your team will find it more challenging to find their ‘off’ switch.
Stress is not a one-dimensional story. It has an upside and a downside. The key is to recognise its motivation potential while actively managing how it unfolds at work to create a culture of resilience, happiness, health and progress with your team.
If you want more on this topic, this article from the Mayo Clinic is worth reading.
Republished with courtesy from michellegibbings.com
Michelle Gibbings
Michelle Gibbings is a workplace expert and the award-winning author of three books. Her latest book is 'Bad Boss: What to do if you work for one, manage one or are one'. www.michellegibbings.com.
10 Incredible Facts About the Harry Potter Story and J.K. Rowling's Magical Journey to Success
BY ROSHAN THIRANS
10 Incredible Facts About the Magic Behind the Harry Potter Story
Introduction
The world of Harry Potter is brimming with magic, from the grand halls of Hogwarts to the smallest details in Diagon Alley, but the story behind its creation is just as extraordinary. J.K. Rowling, who conceived the idea of a young wizard on an ordinary train journey, wove her own struggles, resilience, and imagination into every chapter of her series. Before the fame, the global fanfare, and the multi-billion-dollar franchise, there was just a woman with a dream and the determination to make it a reality. Each fact about Rowling’s journey unveils a piece of this powerful tale—a story of hard work, overcoming adversity, and, ultimately, the magic of belief. Here are 10 amazing facts that you may have not known about Rowling and the amazing Harry Potter adventure:
1. A Spark of Inspiration on a Train
In 1990, while riding a delayed train from Manchester to London, J.K. Rowling conceived the idea for the Harry Potter series. The character of Harry Potter—a young, bespectacled boy who would soon become the most famous wizard in the world—came to her mind fully formed. As she watched the English countryside pass by, Rowling started imagining a magical world hidden within our own, and by the time the train finally arrived, she had the foundation for what would become "Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone." Surprisingly, Rowling didn’t have a pen at the time, so she relied on her memory until she could begin writing.
2. The Profound Influence of Grief
Rowling’s life took a tragic turn with the death of her mother, Anne, who passed away at just 45 due to multiple sclerosis. This loss deeply impacted her, infusing the story with themes of love, loss, and resilience. The orphaned Harry, who carries the pain of losing his own parents, became a channel for Rowling’s personal grief. This sorrow brought an emotional richness to her writing, particularly evident in the Mirror of Erised, where Harry sees his parents, and in the Dementors, which embody her struggles with depression.
A poignant scene of a young woman writer sitting alone at a wooden desk, her expression somber and reflective, conveying deep grief. She is surrounded by notes, papers, and a photograph of an older woman, symbolizing her mother. Soft, gentle lighting creates a warm glow around her, but the room feels subdued, with shadows emphasizing her sorrow. Through the window, a faint morning light shines in, suggesting hope amidst grief. The setting captures a quiet moment of remembrance, loss, and inspiration for writing, with an atmosphere that balances melancholy and resilience.
3. Writing Through Struggles and Adversity
Rowling wrote much of the first novel while struggling financially and raising her infant daughter, Jessica, as a single mother. She often wrote in cafés around Edinburgh, as the warmth and affordable coffee provided some comfort amid her financial troubles. Living on a £70 weekly welfare check, Rowling poured her dreams and desperation into the pages of her book. Harry’s escape from Privet Drive into the magical world mirrors her own longing to escape her circumstances, making the story resonate even more with readers facing their own struggles.
4. Rejection by 12
Rowling’s manuscript was rejected by 12 publishers before Bloomsbury Children’s Books finally took a chance on the story in 1997. Christopher Little, her agent, believed in Rowling’s vision and persisted despite multiple rejections. The decision to publish the book wasn’t initially unanimous, but the young daughter of Bloomsbury's chairman read the first chapter and loved it—her enthusiasm ultimately convinced the publishers to buy the rights for just £10,000. It’s a reminder of the role that young readers played in bringing the magic of Harry Potter to life.
Source: image by storyset from freepik
A symbolic and evocative scene showing a determined woman at a desk with a stack of manuscripts and letters, symbolizing repeated rejections. She is sitting in a dimly lit room, with twelve rejection letters scattered around her, some with 'Rejected' stamps in bold red. Her expression is thoughtful and resilient, as she gazes at a glowing manuscript page, symbolizing hope and persistence. The atmosphere is warm yet dramatic, with soft, glowing light around the page, suggesting a spark of inspiration. Suitable as an inspirational image for articles on persistence and overcoming rejection.
5. “J.K. Rowling” Became an Identity Rowling’s publisher suggested she use her initials rather than her full name, fearing boys might be hesitant to read a book written by a woman. She adopted the pseudonym “J.K. Rowling”— adding the “K” to honor her grandmother, Kathleen. The name became iconic, with Rowling later reflecting on how this choice shielded her in the beginning, allowing her to keep a low profile while her story reached readers around the world.
6. A Meteoric Rise in Success
By the year 2000, Rowling was Britain’s highest-earning woman, making over £20.5 million in just one year. The Harry Potter phenomenon had exploded, with children and adults alike waiting in line for each new release. Rowling’s life transformed almost overnight, from struggling writer to literary superstar, proving the world’s insatiable appetite for the wizarding world she’d created.
7. The Birth of a Film Empire
The release of the first Harry Potter film in 2001 catapulted Rowling’s earnings into the stratosphere, with her total estimated wealth exceeding $100 million. The film’s success spurred the creation of an eight-part cinematic saga that became one of the most successful film franchises in history, grossing over $7 billion. Rowling’s story had not only charmed readers but enchanted viewers worldwide, sparking new interest in books, film, and the magic of storytelling.
8. A Commitment to Giving Back
With fame and fortune, Rowling remained steadfast in her commitment to social causes. She became the chair of the charity One Parent Families and later established her own charitable foundation, Lumos, which focuses on ending the institutionalization of children globally. Inspired by her experiences as a single mother, she dedicated her time and resources to supporting vulnerable communities, using her platform to advocate for a better world.
9. Magic Translated to Over 80 Languages
The Harry Potter books have been translated into more than 80 languages, including Latin and even Braille, allowing readers from every corner of the globe to experience the magic. The series’ cross-cultural appeal speaks to its universal themes of friendship, courage, and the triumph of good over evil. The global reach of Harry Potter has created a worldwide community of fans who, regardless of their native language, understand and cherish Harry’s journey.
10. A Legacy That Continues
Decades after its publication, Harry Potter remains a cultural phenomenon, inspiring theme parks, merchandise, and a thriving fan community that spans generations. Rowling’s story encourages young and old readers alike to imagine a world of possibility, where ordinary people can become heroes. Today, new generations are introduced to Hogwarts, proving that the power of storytelling is, indeed, magical.
Conclusion: Lessons for Our Own Journeys
J.K. Rowling’s path to success is a testament to the power of persistence, creativity, and the courage to share one's voice with the world, even amid personal battles. Like Rowling, we may face challenges that seem insurmountable or hear "no" more times than we’d like to count. Yet, her journey reminds us that every rejection is a step closer to the right opportunity and that our greatest strengths often emerge in times of hardship.
Rowling's story is a call to nurture our imaginations, to trust our unique vision, and to believe in our ability to create something meaningful. Her commitment to giving back—through charity, advocacy, and her ongoing work in storytelling—reminds us that true success includes a responsibility to make a difference for others. We, too, can take what we've learned, what we've earned, and what we've endured to enrich the world around us.
By following Rowling’s footsteps, embracing our own stories, and daring to bring them to life, we can find the magic within ourselves. Whether it's in the form of a book, a project, or a personal goal, every journey holds the potential for transformation, as long as we have the heart to see it through.
To read more Happy Potter articles and learn how to transform your life through Harry Potterism, click here
Roshan Thiran
Roshan is the Founder and “Kuli” of the Leaderonomics Group of companies. He believes that everyone can be a leader and "make a dent in the universe," in their own special ways. He is featured on TV, radio and numerous publications sharing the Science of Building Leaders and on leadership development. Follow him at www.roshanthiran.com
Why You Need to Add Consensus D ecision Making to Your Approach
BY MICHELLE GIBBINGS
What comes to mind when you hear the phrase 'consensus decision making'? Do you groan and think this will take too long and never get anywhere?
Consensus decision making evokes images of long debates that never get anywhere or agreements that have been so watered down that they're virtually meaningless. There's also the argument that it removes personal accountability and leads to groupthink.
As former UK Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher said: "To me consensus seems to be the process of abandoning all beliefs, principles, values and policies. So it is something in which no one believes and to which no, one objects."
Decision making is a process, and it's never a one-size-fits-all approach, which means there is a time and place to strive for consensus.
For example, in a state of emergency, you need a chain of command so it is clear who is in control. In these situations, centralised decision making is helpful because decisions need to be made quickly. This doesn't mean decisions are made in isolation. Data and insights are sought from the right people at the right time. It's targeted and swift.
In other situations, where securing sustained support for the decision is essential, a consensus model of decision making is useful.
The Benefits
There are four key benefits of applying a consensus decision making approach:
Resisting Business Change
» Inclusivity and Equal Participation - At its core, consensus decision making is about inclusivity. Every group member is encouraged to voice their opinions and concerns, ensuring that all perspectives are considered. This can lead to more well-rounded and thoughtful decisions as diverse views are integrated into the final outcome.
» Enhanced Commitment and Ownership - When people feel that their voices have been heard and their input has shaped the decision, they are more likely to be committed to the outcome. This sense of ownership can lead to higher engagement and motivation, as individuals feel personally invested in the outcome.
» Improved Relationships and Group Dynamics - The process of working together to reach a consensus can strengthen relationships within the group. For that to happen, the process must be based on open communication and transparency, with a safe space for people to share and raise concerns.
» Better Quality Decisions - The process encourages critical thinking and problem-solving as group members work together to address concerns and find a way forward. Also, because the process involves discussion and deliberation, it enables new ideas and solutions (that might not have emerged through more traditional decision making methods) to arise.
Ditch the Myths
People shy away from consensus decision making for several reasons: it's too hard, time-consuming, and costly.
Central to those concerns is the belief that reaching consensus means that everyone must agree on everything. That's not the case.
Consensus decision making is about reaching an agreement that everyone can live with. This means there may be parts that you don't necessarily like, but you won't object to them.
Focus on Connection and Process
To ensure the myths don't materialise into facts, as the leader, you will want to deliberate about how and why you strive for consensus. In your planning, it helps to consider three elements: structure, skills, and sensitivity.
1. Structure - It's essential to establish clear guidelines at the start. This includes defining what constitutes a consensus, how decisions will be made, and how disagreements will be handled. A structured process helps prevent confusion and ensures everyone is on the same page.
The group needs to own the process and be actively involved in designing and agreeing on how it will work. So, while you will spend time planning the approach, the group needs to be involved along the way.
Also, allocate sufficient time for discussion and deliberation. This ensures that all perspectives are thoroughly considered and the final decision is well-informed.
2. Skills - Effective facilitation can significantly improve the success of your process. Facilitators can help guide the discussion, keep the group focused, and ensure that everyone has an opportunity to contribute. Consequently, there will be times when you will want to bring in an expert workshop facilitator to help guide the process.
When I use this process with groups, the focus is on active, considered and reflective participation. Getting people up and moving is part of the process, as is time for quiet reflection and
contemplation. Through techniques of idea generation, sorting, and clarification, it becomes clear where there is agreement and where there are differences. The differences are welcomed because this creates the opportunity to explore the idea from multiple angles.
On many occasions, I find the differences can be based on interpretation or terminology, or it may go deeper and be ideologically or belief-based.
Giving everyone the chance to be heard enables the group to navigate through the differences and find a sense of common ground. This means there will be trade-offs, compromises, and creative solutions to reach the agreed-upon decision.
3. Sensitivity - Creating an environment where everyone feels comfortable sharing their thoughts and opinions is crucial. This means addressing any power imbalances so you can ensure all voices are heard, not just the loudest or most influential.
Of course, securing an agreement is much easier if there is 'goodwill' in the room and genuine intent to find a way to reach an agreement. So, laying the groundwork for how the group works together is an important step. You want to agree on the 'how' before you get into the 'what.
Your Reflection
When you think about your team and how and where you make decisions, what role could a consensus approach play? It helps to consider this question in advance so you are applying the optimal process to the decisions that need to be made.
Republished with courtesy from michellegibbings.com
Michelle Gibbings
Michelle Gibbings is a workplace expert and the award-winning author of three books. Her latest book is 'Bad Boss: What to do if you work for one, manage one or are one'. www.michellegibbings.com.
In Culture Is the Way: How Leaders at Every Level Build an Organization for Speed, Impact, and Excellence, former NFL Pro, world-renowned keynote speaker, and management consultant Matt Mayberry delivers an incisive and hands-on blueprint for employee engagement and peak productivity.
Through the chapters, the author describes culture as the essential roadmap to organizational transformation, unbendingly focusing on its importance in the workplace.
Seeking to improve the performance of their team members, the author explores how leaders, at every level, can build a workplace culture that drives organizational excellence and unleashes every employee's full potential.
Besides listing Five common roadblocks that prevent leaders from using culture to get the best from their people and how to overcome them, Matt Mayberry includes the HOWS of the items listed below as the main contents.
» How leaders at every level build an organization for speed, impact and excellence.
» How to build a culture where people can become the best version of themselves and transform organizational performance.
» How to implement your playbook for cultural excellence across your entire organisation.
"Culture is to an organization what oxygen is to living beings. Culture is what makes the organizations' heartbeat"
- Dr. Deep Bali, Columbia University
DIANA MARIE
Diana Marie is a team member at the Leadership Institute of Sarawak Civil Service attached with Corporate Affairs who found love in reading and writing whilst discovering inspiration in Leadership that Makes a Difference.
“The deep-seated purpose of an organization, what it does daily, and the level of impact it has internally and externally are all aspects of its culture.”
