Behind Blue Eyes: How an ERISA Attorney Shed Everything That Underpinned His Existence to Transform Into a Modern Day Adventurer

By Mark S. Miller

published by Sheathed quill press reviewed by JenniFer SMith

Apartner in one of the largest law firms in the United States, author Mark Miller had a thriving ERISA practice and was a billing machine for his firm. But in 2013, at age 52, he was burning out. Miller was concentrating on his clients’ issues rather than his own, and he didn’t want to wake up at 65 wondering where his life had gone.

With The Who’s “Behind Blue Eyes” playing in the background, Miller decided that he needed to take an “adult time out” and find out who he was—in other words, Who was the man behind his blue eyes? Miller recognized that a significant roadblock to his planned time out would be that “Big Law” lawyers really don’t take vacations, let alone extended ones. And even if they do manage to escape abroad or to a beach somewhere, their work tends to follow them. He also was aware that even proposing a long vacation might be perceived as a path leading to eventual sepa- ration from the firm.

Because asking for a time out in his circumstances was (so far as he could tell) unprecedented, he was unable to find resources to help him pitch this request to his firm. So, he made his own. Specifically, he devised a 13-step framework he called his “Jerry Maguire manuscript,” so named for the 1996 movie about a sports agent who is fired when he proposes a new way of doing business. Miller sent this manuscript to his managing partner and, after some negotiation—and to everyone’s surprise—the firm accepted the proposal, and Miller secured a four-and-a-half month sabbatical.

Miller launched his adventure with a 29-day voyage on a container ship from Newark, New Jersey, to Genoa, Italy. The long, slow trip helped set the stage for the rest of his time out—largely cut off from emails and phone calls, Miller wound up meeting many interesting people along the way. Once in Italy, he traveled the country enjoying great food and wine.

In contrast to the first phase of his sabbatical, Miller next traveled to Cape Town, South Africa. There, he connected with a welcoming running group but also climbed Table Mountain solo. He traveled up the coast visiting surfer towns like Saint James and Jeffreys Bay and eventually made his way to Mozambique to enjoy that nation’s beaches and sailboats. A tour of Uganda followed, including safaris featuring chimpanzees and gorillas, as did a grueling climb of the Rwenzori Mountains. Later, in Tanzania, he even summited Kilimanjaro.

Miller ended his journey in Europe, first returning to Italy to take in the impressive architecture of Rome and Vatican City, the beaches of Tropea, and the running trails of Sicilia. Finally, he set out for France, where he ran a marathon in Bordeaux and spent a day exploring Paris. He then returned home to Houston.

As Miller acknowledges in the book, he wasn’t entirely “unplugged” from work throughout his time out—predictably, remote meetings and long-distance phone calls followed him overseas—but he did manage to keep to his planned course and adventures. And more than just experiencing those adventures, Miller’s time away from his practice allowed him the space to reflect on his life and career, reflections that evolved as his journey progressed. And while much of the book offers the reader a chance to live vicariously through the author’s globetrotting, perhaps a more significant aspect of it is its encouragement that each of us seek out our own adult time out to discover—or, for some, rediscover—who we were meant to be.

Jennifer Smith is director of communication and associate corporate counsel for PPI Quality & Engineering, LLC.