PROCESSION OF WEDDING PARTY & COUPLE

Before we talk about the procession and how your wedding party will enter the venue, let’s talk about the composition of your wedding party.

CHANGING UP THE TRADITIONAL WEDDING PARTY

Every time we ask a couple about the size and composition of their wedding party, the answers are almost always the same! It is usually some derivative of “4 plus 4”, or “3 on my side and 4 on his”, or “I have 3 and she has 2”. Our initial response is that this is your wedding and there should be no “sides” in this. In reality, you have each asked friends and loved ones to stand up with you and celebrate your union. They are participating in the wedding for BOTH of you. Even the labels “bridesmaid” and “groomsman” seem outdated and less relevant to today’s modern wedding ceremony. Gender lines have been eliminated and so too has the notion that each partner must have an equal number of attendants. So, with the wide variety in wedding party structure and participation that we now see, why do most ceremonies still involve the wedding party standing together in one contiguous lineup at the front of the service? This provides creative couples one more opportunity to mix things up and allow their guests to leave the ceremony saying, “I have never seen that before”, or “that was different”. It will leave a lasting impression to keep the memory of your ceremony alive for a long time.

The ways in which you can have your wedding party arranged are almost limitless, and here are just a few ideas to help get the creative juices flowing; • Have the wedding party stand in pairs • Have the wedding party seated in the front row, leaving all the focus on the couple • All the wedding party stand to one side in a non-symmetrical alignment • Stand the wedding party along the sides with just the bride and groom in the centre • The wedding party stands behind the couple – forming a semi-circle in which the ceremony is held The physical setup of the venue also provides options for the location of the wedding party. Consider placing them on a stairway behind the couple, on risers at different levels, or even arrange seating for them during the ceremony. Minor changes like this help make your ceremony more unique and memorable while still recognizing the tradition of a wedding ceremony.

NOW LET’S TALK ABOUT THE PROCESSION

The entrance of the wedding party (and the bride) is one of the most memorable parts of a ceremony for most guests. It is the “opening” of the ceremony and sets the tone for what is to come.

10 Unique Ceremony Processional Ideas

1 – Give the groom his own moment: In many ceremonies, the groom and his groomsmen will enter quietly from a side door without anyone noticing. They often don’t get their own music or any attention. So why not shine a spotlight on the groom? After all, he is an equal part of the wedding. Borrowing from Jewish tradition, the groom gets escorted down the aisle with his parents, usually after the bridal party is in place. Brides shouldn’t be the only ones with a special entrance!

2 – Mix up the escorts: We’re used to seeing a bride enter her wedding ceremony on her father’s arm. But there’s no reason why she can’t be escorted by someone else. The bride can walk in with both her parents, just her mom, her stepparents, grandparents, favourite aunt, brother, best friend, old boss – you get the point! If the aisle isn’t wide enough to accommodate all of the awesome people the bride wants to walk down with, she can still include her loved ones in the processional by sending them down the aisle ahead of her or stopping to hug them at the end of the aisle or along the way. 3 – Solo party: You know who else can escort the bride down the aisle? Herself! She can definitely walk in loud and proud by herself. After all, she is entering freely and independently into marriage, so why not walk independently too? This is an awesome solution for couples who feel a bit icky at the thought of the bride being “given away” by her father.

4 – Walk in as a couple, walk out as a couple: One of our favourite processional ideas is seeing both partners walk in together. Who better to share the spotlight with than the person you’re about to join in marriage? Both soon-to-be spouses enter the ceremony as equal partners heading into marriage together. As a slight variation, you could also have both partners enter at the same time from opposite sides and meet at the altar.

5 – Here, Fido! If you have a beloved furry friend in your life, incorporating him or her into the wedding processional is an awesome idea. We’ve seen dogs as ring bearers with little pillows on their backs and cats being held by their humans as they say, “I do.” If you do decide to include your fur baby, ensure you have a plan for Fido before and after the ceremony. The last thing you want is a leg lifted over an expensive white dress!

6 – Flower POWER & Rings Traditionally the Flower Girl and Ring Bearer honour goes to the cutest little humans, who very often “steal the show”, but if kids are not an important part of your life right now - why not change this up in unique and FUN ways? Many YouTube posts show one of the groom’s attendants dancing up the aisle to some funky tune (think “I’m Too Sexy”) while tossing flower petals all about. If you know someone (or someones) with a great sense of humour and at least a slight sense of rhythm – why not get them to entertain everyone with a spectacular entrance? Another option that is growing in popularity is having Grandma(s) or Mom(s) as flower girls. WHY NOT?!?!?!?! Even if you have a young person selected as a flower girl, having them share the fun with a Grandma or Mom would be super cute and unique. To spice up the entrance of the ring bearer, try to imagine a championship presentation in sports. The symbol of supremacy – be it the Grey Cup, Stanley Cup, Vince Lombardi Trophy, or even a Wrestling belt – is always ushered in with great pomp and ceremony. Why not do the same for your wedding rings? You can have them carried in, raised up high by an official ring bearer….or have a small human escorted by “security” (think Men in Black) with the rings under lock and key. The possibilities are limited only by your imagination.

7 – “Stagger” the entrance One of the most dynamic entrances we have “choreographed” is a staggered entrance for the entire wedding party. Picture this….the groom’s parents walk in together but stop and wait in the aisle, just before reaching the front. Next the groom’s attendants enter individually and stop at staggered points on opposite sides of the aisle. When the groom enters, he pauses in his walk up the aisle to received congratulations (shake hands, brohug, whatever) from each of the attendants as he progresses up the aisle. When he meets his parents, he joins them to be escorted the rest of the way to the front. As each of the bride’s attendants enter, one of the groom’s attendants’ steps forward from their spot and joins them to walk as a couple up the aisle to the front. Finally, the bride makes her grand entrance when the rest of the wedding party is assembled at the front.

8 – Skip the wedding party: If the idea of having a wedding party and sending people down the aisle isn’t for you, skip it! You do need people to legally witness your wedding, but no one says they have to walk down an aisle or even stand next to you. And if you don’t have young people in your life that you are especially close to, don’t stress to fill the roles of flower girl, ring bearer, junior bridesmaid, etc. As a slight variation, you can include your wedding party in the processional but ask them to sit once they’ve reached the end of the aisle. That way, they get to watch the ceremony and the moment becomes just about the two of you.

9 – Rock your own music: No, Wagner’s “Wedding March” (aka “Here Comes the Bride”) is not a mandatory processional song. You aren’t required to choose a church hymn or a love song for your walk down the aisle. Change it up! Play whatever music makes you happy. Traditionally, the music changes for the bride’s entrance but you could totally have a unique song for each partner when they walk in.

10 – Skip the processional all together! If the idea of walking down a long aisle with all eyes on you fills you with dread, skip the processional all together! Just show up at the front – you could discreetly enter from a side door or back door. You could even be there before guests arrive. Or you could mingle with your guests and slowly make your way to the front when you want the ceremony to start.

DON’T FORGET YOUR PARENTS We have conducted many wedding rehearsals where a discussion (and sometimes a debate) breaks out when the parents have a different vision of what the procession will be and whether they will be included in it. Let’s avoid that awkwardness and now think about when and how you want your parents to enter the venue.

BRIDE’S ENTRANCE The bride’s entrance is always a special moment in a ceremony. Sometimes it is the first time that the couple will see each other in their wedding finest. If the bride will be escorted up the aisle by a parent(s) or loved one(s), there should be a meaningful “transition” from walking the aisle to joining your partner at the front of the venue. Consider having the bride and her escort(s) pause before reaching the front (usually at the first row of chairs). Your partner will then step forward to join in as you hug and embrace your escort(s). This brief moment symbolizes the welcoming and joining of the families. The couple will then come together (lock arms or hold hands) and join the officiant at the front of the venue.