Brock About Town

IS IT JUST ME, OR HAS THIS ALREADY BEEN AN INSANE SUMMER? In the wake of the CDC’s declaration that fully vaccinated adults are OK to go out without a mask, provided they’re not in a crowded indoor area, the good people of Iowa City have totally lost their minds. People are licking the handrails on the bus, sharing ice cream cones with strangers. I was in a bar last night, and there was a couple making out in the doorway to the women’s bathroom. Of all the inconsiderate behavior! Of course, I couldn’t judge them too harshly, because I was making out with the bartender at the time. Consider this column my formal apology to those who did not get their drinks.

Yes, it seems as though the pandemic, in conjunction with Megan Thee Stallion, has revived the concept of the summer fling. I highly recommend you try it. What could possibly be more romantic than picnics in the park, day trips out to Lake Macbride and making promises you have no intention of keeping after the first leaf hits the ground in September? See below for some hot tips for your hot girl summer:

• Go easy on yourself. After a year of Facetiming your mom and stammering your way through weekly conversations with

Bread Garden cashiers, there is no way you’re going to resume your pre-COVID game immediately. Forget about pickup lines. If you can manage to brush your teeth, put some real pants on and get through a whole coffee date without listing all the brands of antiperspirant that didn’t work out for you, you’ll be fine. Everyone else is just as desperate as you are.

• Vet potential partners before you get too involved. This might seem obvious, but the list of questions has basically doubled in the last year. Now, along with “When was the last time you were tested for STDs?” and “You’re wearing that Hawaiian shirt ironically, right?” you have to ask questions like “Have you had your COVID vaccine? If not, is it because you think it contains a microchip that will allow Joe Biden to control your mind via remote, or do you just have an autoimmune disorder or something?” Don’t get caught unawares, people.

• Take all the usual precautions. I know it feels like the Earth was narrowly missed by an asteroid and every day is a blessed miracle, but you still need to use condoms. And wear sunscreen. And consume something other than piña coladas and mozzarella sticks from Yacht Club. You want to be fighting fit for cuffing season.

Doesn’t matter if you won by ONE vote. You won. Hopefully next time you won’t be so fortunate. —Marcia C.C.

I would like her to follow her own advice ‘At that time, Miller-Meeks thanked Hart for her decision, and said, “It’s time to move forward, to unite, as one group of people supporting Iowa’s 2nd Congressional District.” —Sherry D. The Meeks shall not inherit anything except Donald Trump’s traitorous legacy. —Tim A.

The very first issue of little Village hit stands 20 years ago on July 1, 2001. What were you doing then? Do you remember picking up the first lV?

I didn’t see the issue but when I heard about it, I was happy something from Icon survived. —William B. I don’t remember much about this issue but this is how I discovered Greg Brown! Still am a fan of his!! I grabbed it to read while I ate my lunch!! —Tarrill A. Riding my motorcycle cross country two months from moving to IC. Sadly I think it was a couple of then [sic] before I picked up a copy. —Dan S. I moved to Iowa City On August 11, 2001 so I have never known IC without LV. —Melissa N.

STRESS FRACTURES

JOHN MARTINEK

“Myself alone, here awash, walking / screens onto screens / entangled with a fitbit for Christ’s sake.” —McGuirk, from a poem read on the Ped Mall for Mission Creek Summer Sessions, June 10

“I hope the people of Iowa City have seen how hard I have worked to listen to all voices and will give me the opportunity to continue serving them as we move past this difficult time into a period of growth, healing and betterment for our future.” —Iowa City Mayor Bruce Teague, announcing he is running for reelection to the city council, June 17

“I think we [Iowa lawmakers] expected those carrying signs to do more work than we were able to do in that moment, and when they were unable to because they caught felony charges fighting alongside us, we didn’t carry the weight as strongly as they did. And it shows.” —Iowa Senator and 2022 Democratic candidate for Iowa governor Ras Smith on the state’s failure to pass more policing reform

“I am so proud of this moment. I’m so happy.” —Royceann Porter as the Johnson County Board of Supervisors voted to change the county’s eponym to Lulu Merle Johnson, a trailblazing Black University of Iowa graduate

Zak Neumann

“The journey has been hard. It hasn’t been easy. An immigrant, Muslim woman and a person of color, I have been through a lot—a lot, a lot—breaking barriers … But for Iowa City, it was a price worth paying.” —Mazahir Salih, announcing she would not be running for reelection to the Iowa City Council, and endorsing Shawn Harmsen, June 23

“I think we’re off to a good start. A lot of work to do, via campaign but I’m very optimistic about it.” —Cedar Rapids Mayor Brad Hart on selecting members for the new citizen review board, June 22

TWITTER DRAMA

Starring three local Democrats: John Green, newly elected Johnson County supervisor; Lonny Pulkrabek, former Johnson County sheriff; and Lyz Lenz, Cedar Rapids-based author.

@modestholdings (Jon Green) [Shares Gazette opinion piece by Tara McGovern: “Local police in Iowa do not need military tactical equipment”]

@LonnyPulkrabek: yeah, nothing against a musician, but that is not where Iowan’s [sic] seek public safety advice.

Green: With respect, as public servants, it seems to me we should seek input from all of our constituents.

Pulkrabek: The silent majority wants you to let law enforcement do their job and keep them safe. That includes giving them the tools to carry that out. MEGA STORE littlevillagemag.myshopify.com PRINTED By UNION LABOR IN IOWA

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