AUGUST 2019
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Cousin Fun:
Celebrating Your First Best Friend
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COUSIN CAMP
BACK-TO-SCHOOL
HOMETOWN HERO
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NANA’S KITCHEN
CRASHING WAVES
PASSPORT TO PURITY
Contributing Writers Jeanette Anderton Hilary Andrews Cindy Beckman Andrea Champlin Eden Corley Melissa Gates – Cover Story Marisa Hicks
WINC team Summertime is a great season to spend some extra time focusing on the family. With the kids out of school, summer is an ideal time to take some time off work and have some fun in the sun. Regardless of whether your vacation consists of exploring new destinations, staying close to home or perhaps carrying on an annual tradition, the key to making the most of it is relishing time with loved ones. As the start of a new school year looms and summer break begins to draw to an end — even if the summer temperatures show no sign of leaving soon — this issue of WINC takes a look back and celebrates family time and summertime. Our cover story introduces readers to a local family’s tradition they have carried on for more than 30 years. As their family grew, so did the celebration, a week-long camping trip they loving refer to as Cousin Camp. Nowadays, the family members travel from all over the U.S. and beyond — one couple lives in Japan but returns to Arkansas each year for Cousin Camp — to enjoy family, food and fellowship at one of the The Natural State’s own treasured camping spots. Another family celebrates love in WINC’s featured wedding story. The couple bonded over a passion for education and traveling. As they honeymoon in Florence, Italy, the bride shares a few tidbits about their new blended family.
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The Majestic Mama knows her daughter well enough to know the tray she bought for the girl’s jewelry is too bland for the tweenager’s vibrant personality. Armed with some art supplies, Majestic Mama shows how she transformed the tray into a daughter-approved masterpiece. Parents looking to help their children navigate through the tough issues that often arise at school such as peer pressure, dating and more should take a look at WINC’s Passport to Purity article, where a local mom shares her struggle of knowing how to talk about the tough subjects with her growing kids. ‘Nana’ offers up a hearty chicken tetrazzini recipe straight from her kitchen in Greenbrier, along with some family anecdotes. A local police officer shares his story in this issue’s Hometown Hero. One family raves about the ‘back-toschool fairy’ that helped them get ready to go back to school. As readers begin to think about gearing up for the upcoming school year, they can reflect on exceptional men in education with WINC’s Look Back at some local legends in the classroom. Enjoy this issue, and soak up the last few days of summer with your loved ones. School will be back in session before we know it. As for the cooler temperatures, well, hopefully they’re not too far behind.
Ron Beckman Andrea Champlin Lulu Photography – Cover Story Advertising Sales Executives Kelly Booy Crystal Geraldson Leigh Anne Gray Editorial Board Cindy Beckman Andrea Champlin Eden Corley Melissa Gates
Questions or Comments? Call (501) 327-6621 e-mail: editorial@thecabin.net or write to: 1121 Front Street, Conway, AR, 72032 www.womensinc.net
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Cousin Fun: Celebrating Your First Best Friend By Melissa Gates
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So many summer memories frequently revolve around family time; which for most means great time with cousins. Those ‘almost siblings’ essentially become your first best friend. There’s nothing like running through the sprinkler in grandma’s front yard with them, hunting Easter eggs with them, or like in my case, putting on a musical/magic show with them for older family members to enjoy in your grandma’s basement. Families like the Bowlin/Butler/Stewart group seem to set the standard when it comes to celebrating generations of cousins. Every summer for more than thirty years the group has gone to the Tannebaum area of Greers Ferry Lake to play, relax, and make memories for a week; some families call it ‘Cousin Camp.’ The family matriarch, 88 year old Geneva Bowlin, always decided who slept where in the large house they all rent and share; and what everyone will eat. In recent years her daughter, Vicki Butler has taken over that responsibility. Butler says, “Figuring the meals is a challenge. I usually have a meal list done six weeks in advance.” The kids are expected to chop vegetables, set the table, and keep up with a chore chart. “We are trying to teach responsibility. This year our 13-year-old made the chore chart. She’s so proud of it,” Butler says.
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Family members gather from all over for the reunion. Some come from Florida, and neighboring states, while two come all the way from Japan. There are 25 great-grandchildren aged 2-17 that attend. Family members plan activities for the cousins like spa night for the girls, fishing, swimming, boating, crafting, and movies. One year learning to make Japanese origami was the biggest hit. But the favorite event of the week is when Great Grandma gets out her special handmade ceramic bowl. She fills it with money, has the tallest person hold it way up high, and lets the kids each take a turn reaching into it. Everyone gets a Ziploc baggie for their treasures. Butler says, “The dip into the bowl is the best. The kids look forward to that all year! She used to just put coins in the bowl; but now she adds bills too.” Family members say it’s very important for them to gather every year and cherish making memories together. They know loss all too well. Over the years they’ve lost precious family members; some way too soon. Vicki’s dad, daughter, and husband all passed away in a two year time period recently. Butler’s daughter Katie says, “There’s more motivation to cling together. We don’t take each other for granted. Many of us live within one mile of each other and help with each other’s kids.” 8 WINC. | August 2019
“We don’t take each other for granted. Many of us live within one mile of each other and help with each other’s kids.” – Katie
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A typical day on vacation includes towing the great-grandkids around the lake on a tube, heading in for lunch, getting back out on the boat, or taking a nap. Later they all gather for dinner around a twelve foot long table surrounded with twenty chairs. Vicki Butler says, “Everyone always knows what’s for dinner always. It’s structured chaos!” Some of the girl cousins’ favorite memories include braiding each other’s hair at bedtime, and telling each other stories. “It’s like one big slumber party,” Butler says, “I get to learn the cool hip language from the younger ones and learn about the latest ailments from the older ones.” That week spent at the lake, the parents don’t over-manage their kiddos. The cousins are given space to run and play. Family member Savanah Butler says, “They learn how to problem solve because we don’t hover. They are always told family is first.”
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“She’s happy and peppy while we’re there. She loves to give and receive love.” – Vicki Butler
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And for family matriarch, Geneva Bowlin the time together is invigorating. “She’s happy and peppy while we’re there. She loves to give and receive love,” says Vicki Butler. And there’s no one better to do that with than your first best friends. “I love overhearing the girl cousins’ conversations. They’re so sweet together. They share secrets. They talk about this trip all year long,” says Butler. If you haven’t vacationed with or spoken to your first best friend in a while; this summer might be the perfect time to organize your own ‘cousin camp.’
If you haven’t vacationed with or spoken to your first best friend in a while; this summer might be the perfect time to organize your own ‘cousin camp.’ 12 WINC. | August 2019
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Nana’s Living by her own design would bring his family back to Dumas, Arkansas, until managePatsy Southall is a woman of ment opportunities called him to all trades. She was a telephone Gainesville, Florida. operator in the 1960s, has “Gainesville was a beautiful city extensive knowledge of computers with hills and trees,” Patsy says. and worked and trained in the “It was a lot like Arkansas, and we field, was an interior designer and were there 27 years. We became a college football coach’s wife. Gator fans. I worked in the comShe sews wedding gowns and puter center at the university. I designs specialty invitation cards eventually got tired of working and for an art gallery. She enjoys opened my own design company. I entertaining and she travels all was having fun!” over the world. When Elbert died suddenly in But in her modest home in 2010, Patsy admits she was unsure Greenbrier on an early summer about the future, but had money afternoon, she’s happy to share to help others and move wherever her favorite recipe and stories she wanted to. about her original artwork “I moved to Branson in 2012 throughout the house. Her living to be near my brother and sister room is impeccable, designed in a in law,” Patsy says. “I bought a deep royal blue and pops of bright mountain home with lots of orange – homage to the Florida windows – it was like having my Gators, her favorite team. Florida house in Branson.” Patsy is originally from Lake There, she hosted family Village, Arkansas, and attended the reunions, class reunions and University of Arkansas at Montichurch groups. “I entertained a lot cello, where she met her husband, while I was there,” she smiles. “It Elbert. was as part of my Branson church Elbert coached football in the family that I went on my first late 1960s and early 1970s – at mission trip to Iran. UAM and then at a school in I’ve since been to China, Greece, Blytheville and then to a university Israel and Jordan. In July, I am going in Monroe, Louisiana. back to Israel because I didn’t get It was there Elbert was recruited to become an insurance to see everything. I am going with the Branson group.” agent with State Farm. His choice
By Kelly Sublett
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In 2014, Patsy moved to Greenbrier to be nearer to her children and grandchildren. She raised two sons and has seven grandchildren who call her “Meme (Mimi).” “I came up with that,” Patsy beams. “When I was at the University of Florida, there was a girl who worked for me named Mi Tai, and we called her Meme, and I always liked that, so I wanted my grandkids to call me Meme.” Her son Mike and wife, Stacie, live in Florida and have two children – Payton, 14, and Avery, 12. Her son Pete and wife, Pricilla, live in Greenbrier and have five children – Madelynne, 17; Morgan, 15; Mia, 11; Mickey, 7; and Magnolia “Maggie,” 6. “When I was in college, I studied home economics – decorating and sewing,” Patsy says. “I wanted to be a fashion designer. And cooking was important, too. I taught my boys how to cook. And both of them still call me when they need help with something.” And part of her passion – for entertaining, teaching and even cooking – is all grounded by her own mother. “Mama liked the kitchen,” Patsy recalls. “She would not just throw us in, but she would show us how. 16 WINC. | August 2019
“The most fun memory I have is making fudge. She showed us how, and when my aunts and uncles would come to play cards, my older sister and I would make fudge.” – Patsy Southall
“The most fun memory I have is making fudge. She showed us how, and when my aunts and uncles would come to play cards, my older sister and I would make fudge.” And having that sense of memory making and something special is not lost on her own children and grandchildren, who have picked up things along the way. “They all like my chicken nuggets,” Patsy says. “Pete makes them for his family.” And Patsy’s kitchen has it’s own story. Aprons hang on the oven and are used regularly, especially when she’s baking with grandkiddos and at Christmas when she bakes for neighbors and friends. She has several of her mother’s kitchen pieces still in rotation – a gravy boat and cloth napkins used during holidays. But the best item, and the one she keeps on display in her kitchen for all time, is a paper towel holder featuring a wooden, painted duck. “This, this is so special because one year I was at her house for Christmas,” she begins to laugh. “We went out to a craft market and I made the comment about these ‘dab blame ducks’ everywhere. You remember those? They were baby blue and crafty and everywhere! Anyway, later on when we were opening gifts, she took a video of me opening this thing. I will never be without it.”
Chicken Tetrazzini • 3 large chicken breasts, deboned and boiled • 1/2 white onion chopped • 1/2 bell pepper • 2 Tbs melted butter • 1/2 small jar chopped pimentos • 8 oz. pkg spaghetti noodles • 1 can cream of chicken (no water) • 8 oz. pkg. Velveeta Cheese, cubed • Salt and pepper Saute onion and pepper in butter. Stir in pimentos – take off heat. Cool chicken and cut into bite-sized pieces. Save broth. Cook pasta and drain. Place soup and Velveeta in large bowl and microwave until melted. Add veggies, chicken and pasta. Add broth if dry. Pour all in greased casserole, cover and bake at 350 degrees for 30 minutes.
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Back-to-school Fairy By Andrea Champlin
I’m always surprised when it’s time to start buying school supplies again. Our summers seem to fly right by. Believe it or not, sometimes going back to school is not so popular at my house. My daughter is usually excited, my boys are usually not. However, there is one thing that all of my kids are excited about: the back-to-school fairy! I have to thank my California cousin Melissa for this fabulous idea. She surprised her girls with a fun, school-related item the morning of the first day of school from the back-to-school fairy. I loved the idea and I adopted it in our home too. I’ve been doing it since my daughter was in pre-k3. She’s about to be in sixth grade, so it’s been a while. The concept is simple. It’s just like the tooth fairy, except your kids don’t have to lose a tooth and the back-to-school fairy brings school-related items. Every year our fairy has brought new backpacks and lunch boxes. I only get things that I would have to buy anyway. But Andrea, you say, I want my kids to pick out their own backpack and lunch boxes. Well, me too! Did you know I have a direct line to the back-to-school fairy? Kind of like Santa.
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I let my children look at backpacks and lunch boxes and they tell me what their favorite is. I’ve also been known to sprinkle a tiny bit of (fairy) glitter in the Target backpack aisle, you know, for authenticity. Yes, I carried glitter with me to the store. I know. This was when my children were younger and I was clearly trying too hard. I now show them backpacks on Amazon. The back-to-school fairy has another added benefit, besides being super fun: my kids jump out of bed on the morning of the first day of school. This is a small miracle. If you’re like our family, your bedtimes get later and you rise (a lot) later during the summer. I’ve seen many articles and blog posts about slowly working your way back into school hours the week before school.
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would buy anyway, only the presentation is different. My son showing off his new backpack from the back-to-school fairy. My daughter is old enough to know that the back-to-school fairy is me, but just like Christmas morning, that doesn’t stop her from jumping out of bed to see what’s in her locker. I’ll have to do something a little different for her this year, as she doesn’t need a backpack. It will most likely be a new outfit to wear on the first day of school. In my years of being a mom, I have found that kids can get really excited about some pretty simple things. This is one of my favorite family traditions and you better believe my kiddos will have a box from the back-toschool fairy on their first day of college.
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Whatever. We live it up the last week of summer. And that’s ok.You know why? The back-to-school fairy. My kids get completely adjusted to the new school schedule in one day. They are usually wide awake way too late the night before school starts, they get up super early to see what the back-toschool fairy brought them, and then that night they pass out at 7:30 because they’re exhausted. Boom. Back on schedule. I love going shopping for school supplies with my children and picking out folders and notebooks. None of that has to change. Just save an item or two, get it when your kids aren’t with you, and give it to them the morning of the first day of school. One of my favorite parts of doing the back-to-school fairy is that it’s things that I
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Crashing Waves I laugh at our vacation beach pictures from a few years ago because most of them shout “we are having the time of our lives... wish you were here!” The truth is, our vacation required a lot of patience and well, work. Taking a one year old anywhere takes patience and work. Taking a one year old to a place he really doesn’t love brings that to a whole new level. We even came home a whole day early due to our exhaustion! The first night we walked the gorgeous sunlit sand, sweet Asher screamed his head off. He wouldn’t even let us put him down. We knew he might be a little undone by it all, but we weren’t really expecting the terror that was etched on his face. Eric and I looked at each other, laughed, and said it might be a pretty interesting week. The second day wasn’t much better on the little fellow. He was battling an ear infection and the words sand and sea weren’t making it any better. The third day we were determined to make Asher take some baby steps. After all, he can’t be a member of our family if he doesn’t like the beach, right??? I was beginning to wonder if he had been switched at birth. We started building a sand castle right where the waves come in. Asher would run to us, stay until the next wave came in, and
then run away screaming as fast as his little chubby legs would carry him. The fourth day, any time we put him down, he would start running. Away from the water and towards our beach house. As fast as he could. The fifth day, we decided it was high time for him to get in the water. Eric scooped him up so he would be safe and sound. Asher wouldn’t even have to touch the water, but we wanted him to conquer the fear of the waves and be in it so to speak. He screamed his head off. I looked at that boy, shook my head, and said to myself, “Eric is holding him. What on earth is he afraid of?” Boy, howdy, the Spirit of the Living God was all over me in that moment. God has carried me kicking and screaming into oceans of unknown. I always yell at Him and tell Him I absolutely do not want to go there. He has carried me kicking and screaming into oceans of suicide, miscarriage, depression, financial hardship, crushed dreams, cancer diagnoses, isolation, and rejection. Each crashing wave becomes a new part of my story as the salty brine leaves my skin rougher and more worn. I think of Asher in that moment and how I wanted him to know that everything
By Becke’ Stuart
was alright for one reason only: he was in his daddy’s arms. There wasn’t a single wave that would reach Asher that wouldn’t go through his daddy first. Isn’t that what God was trying to tell us all along? “When you go through the sea, I am with you. When you go through rivers, they will not sweep you away. When you walk through fire, you will not be burned, and the flames will not harm you. I am the LORD your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior. “ Isaiah 43:2 Why do we fear when He has redeemed us and now calls us by name? Why do we scream when He never, for one second, has dropped us or made us leave the security of His strong arms? If 42 years have taught me anything, it is this: we are going to go through the sea, whether we like it or not. Your waves are going to look differently than mine. It is what we do with the “I am with you” part that is going to define our journey. Is God alone enough for us in those heart wrenching seasons? Experience has taught me that He truly is all we need.
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Summertime is Fun Time I don’t know about you, but I absolutely love summer. Maybe that’s because I’ve spent the majority of my adult life indoors and the four walls begin to close in on me sometimes. Could be that I’m preaching to the choir here and many of you feel the same way. Unless it’s oppressively hot, most afternoons after work you’ll find Shirley and me sitting out back in the shade with a glass of tea, reading a book, and listening to the birds.Yeah, we sound like a couple of old folks, but that’s okay with me. In 1963, the great Nat King Cole recorded Those Lazy Hazy Crazy Days of Summer. It was a very popular song and reached No. 6 on the US pop chart. It might surprise you that the song was originally written in German! I guess people everywhere love summer. Expanding on the opening line, “Roll out those lazy, hazy, crazy days of summer”, the nostalgic theme makes reference to “sodas and pretzels and beer” along with “sandwiches and weenies” and beaches with “girls in bikinis.” Sounds pretty good doesn’t it? While the living may not necessarily be easy, we should all adopt a “schools-out” attitude in summer. From the WebMD archives I found a fun and factual little article that suggests that summertime is a perfect time to improve your health with practically little effort on your part. Here are some healthy tips the article listed, covering things from diet, fitness, stress, and vision. Give your diet a berry boost. A cup of mixed fresh berries like blackberries, blueberries, and strawberries will help load you up with antioxidants. Antioxidants definitely
help prevent tissue damage and are shown to reduce the risks of age-related illnesses. Blueberries and blackberries are extremely high in antioxidants. As a bonus, berries are also high in fiber, which is good for cholesterol control and colon health. Sign me up for this one, because I never met a strawberry I didn’t like! Get dirty – and stress less.To improve your stress level,WebMD suggests that you plant a small garden or flower box, or even just a few pots. Actually getting your hands in the dirt is called “grounding.” It may sound silly, but I actually love to get outside and dig in the dirt. It doesn’t matter whether it’s digging up a dead plant and putting a new one in its place or planting some springtime annual flowers – I get a great deal of satisfaction from the activity. Granted, I might be stiff and sore for a couple of days, but it’s definitely worth it. Get outside to exercise.This one is a no-brainer. Go on a hike with your kids, or in our case, grandkids. Conway has some great walking trails and Petit Jean Mountain is also an excellent spot.We took our two oldest granddaughters up there just a few weeks ago and hiked down to Cedar Falls and had a great time.When families play together, they get fit together and create many memories. Pack a picnic lunch and just get out there. It’s a great way to combat stress and depression. Be good to your eyes.We often talk about the importance of sunscreen for your skin to protect against harmful UV ray exposure, but rarely mention the importance of wearing sunglasses that block at least 99% of ultra-
violet A and B rays.Why is that important? Proper sunglasses that block these rays can actually help prevent cataracts and those dreaded wrinkles around the eyes.You don’t have to spend a mint on high quality sunglasses, but don’t buy the cheapo ones either. Function is much more critical than fashion. Take that much-needed vacation.Vacations have multiple health benefits. Unless you bite off more than you can chew, they can help lower your blood pressure, heart rate, and stress hormones such as cortisol.You’re all familiar with good old cortisol, aren’t you? You know, that’s the one which contributes to a widening waist and an increased risk of heart disease. So leave the office and your business obligations at home.Turn off your cell phone and sit on the beach and listen to the waves roll in. Here’s one last thought, go light on the alcohol. If you drink, choose a lite, chilled alcoholic beverage instead of hard liquor. In moderation, defined as one to two drinks daily, alcohol can protect against heart disease. Have a safe and fun summer. David Smith is the owner and chief pharmacist at Smith Family Pharmacy where he works with his wife Shirley and staff. He graduated from the UAMS College of Pharmacy in 1974 and has been taking care of people in the Conway and surrounding areas for more than 43 years. He loves spending time with family and is No1POP to 5 wonderful grandchildren.
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WN METO O H
H E RO
Hometown Hero: Tim Gray by Marisa Hicks Tim Gray began working for the Conway Police Department in late 2011. Prior to his law enforcement career, he served in the military for 20 years. His service ultimately prepared him for his second chapter as a Hometown Hero. “My time in the military prepared me for my career in law enforcement,” Gray told the Log Cabin Democrat. “Patrolling the streets of Baghdad was like being a police force … and law enforcement seemed like a natural progression or extension of the military.” The Conway resident joined the U.S. Army in 1990.
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Gray had hoped to enlist in 1989, but was forced to wait one year because he had kidney stones. At the time, he was a student at the University of Central Arkansas working toward obtaining a computer science degree. However, money was running low. Gray continued working at American Cabinets, a factory that was stationed where Virco Manufacturing Corporation sits today, until he was able to enlist. He was a student and a father and a military man by the age of 23. Joining the military opened up more opportunities and experiences than Gray initially saw himself taking in life. “I wanted to better myself and I knew the military was a route I could take to
better myself. I was also really interested with the military. My dad was in the Navy,” Gray said. The Conway man said he always had an eye for a military career, but never saw himself becoming a police officer. “As a kid, I was just fascinated with the ships, airplanes and helicopters,” he said. “I was always interested in the military, the hardware and the weapons.” Upon joining the U.S. Army, Gray became an Abrams Tanks armor crew member. Through the years, he progressed through the ranks and moved his way up to a platoon sergeant and an Abrams Master Gunner. Before working with tanks, he went through basic training, which proved to
be a challenge. Gray was older than the other teens who enlisted straight out of high school. While the age difference and lack of maturity level around him was distracting, Gray continued pushing forward toward his goals. “Basic training is a big, mental game,” he said. However, the struggle urged him to become stronger and pushed him to be better. “The goal back then was that they wanted to break you down so they could build you up,” he said. “I gained a lot of things that I carry over into today – a good strong work ethic, completion of tasks, discipline, doing the right thing when nobody’s watching. I got a lot of that from joining the military.” Gray had the opportunity to learn a great deal about the world’s history during his time in the military. First, he was stationed in Mannheim, Germany, during Operation Desert Storm. He recalled troops being sent over to Saudi Arabia. “But, the war was over so quickly” and he wasn’t actively involved “in the fighting.” When he wasn’t learning and seeing all the history Germany had to offer, he served as a loader and tank driver. Twice, Gray was deployed to Iraq. He was deployed in 2003 during the initial invasion of Iraq as the Iraq War began. This move gave Gray the true feeling of patriotism as he backed his country. Gray later went back to Iraq in 2005. Being deployed to Iraq during that time was something “most soldiers wanted to do because it was right after 9/11,” he said. “You definitely felt that sense of
patriotism; that sense of duty; and a sense of doing your part. It was definitely a time of uncertainty.” During the initial invasion, Gray was a tank commander and a platoon sergeant. “I was in charge of my own tank, plus three others,” he said, adding that he was also in charge of 15 other soldiers. Along with direct combat, “we would do check points and trap control points, patrol the streets of Baghdad” while stationed in Mosul. The tank company was attached to the 101st Airborne Division. Gray said this was unique and “generally unheard of because they just don’t have tanks. We supported the 101st Airborne’s operations.” The second time Gray was deployed to Iraq, he was stationed at Camp Taji. While there, he performed various jobs from maintaining security along supply routes, clearing routes for IEDs (improvised explosive devices) and more. As his 20-year, military-based career drew to an end, Gray decided to trade one uniform in for another. Following his service in the U.S. Army, Gray decided to begin serving others as a law enforcement officer. Gray was discharged in 2010. At the time, he lived in Jacksonville, Florida, and took a
six-month police academy course. Because the city of Jacksonville limboed and argued over budgeting with its police department, he was not hired on. About 150 other current Jacksonville officers were laid off from the department at the time. It was at this point that Gray said he realized “God had other plans for me” and came back home to Conway. He still wanted to be a law enforcement officer, but when he first moved back to Arkansas in July 2011, he began working as a cashier at the Walmart on Dave Ward Drive. That didn’t last long, though. By October 2011, Gray was hired on as a 911 dispatcher for the Conway Police Department. After getting his foot in the door, he was able to begin his career as a patrol officer in January 2012. Serving the Conway community is more than a blessing to Gray. “I had the opportunity to serve my country, and I was able to come back to my hometown to serve my community,” he said. While the area is “not the same town as it used to be growing up,” Conway is home and has a police department filled with dedicated professionals, he said. womensinc.net 27
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“This department cares about the community and about gaining and maintaining the trust of the community,” he said. Through the years, he has learned police officers wear many hats. “Sometimes you’re asked to fill the role of an impromptu counselor,” he said. “And, sometimes you’re helping to find resources for someone who’s down on their luck and needs money for food.” Gray also recalled a time he helped a woman who ran out of gas make her way to the next gas station. Small, simple acts are what help make up strong, encouraging and supportive officers, he said. “Being able to fill all those roles and to do it honorably is one of the most important things,” Gray said. Gray comes from a family with a military background. His father, Louis, served in the U.S. Navy and his son, Karac, served in the Air Force as a Korean linguist. Gray has been married to Leigh Anne Gray since October 2016. Together, the two collectively have four children: Karac, 32; Lauren, 26; Anna, 17; and Matt, 15.
Uncle Barney’s Chicken A special highlight of Cousin Camp is Uncle Barney’s chicken. Even for those that can’t stay for the entire week of Cousin Camp fun, Uncle Barney’s chicken is a favorite that’s worth the drive even for a one-day treat! Featured below is Jim Stewart, Grill Master Extraordinaire, who grills enough chicken for anyone present and plenty for leftovers later. Funny History: The recipe was passed down from another family who had enjoyed it for generations. While there may not be an Uncle Barney in this bunch, his legacy is kept strong by the Bowlins, Butlers, and Stewarts. We hope it offers your family as much family-bonding fun as it has for us over the years. Bon Appetit!
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Uncle
Barney’s chicken
1 stick of butter 1 medium bottle Worcestershire sauce 2 tablespoons dry mustard 1/2 teaspoon Accent 1 medium bottle soy sauce 2/3 cup vegetable oil 8 lemons, juiced Salt and pepper to taste Squeeze the lemons, saving one rind to cut up and add to the sauce. Put lemon juice and all the ingredients in a medium saucepan. Add one cut up lemon rind and simmer for 15 minutes. Remove from heat and baste chicken liberally while grilling. *We use bone-in chicken thighs and legs. The sauce works best with chicken that still has the skin on. 30 WINC. | August 2019
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Passport to Purity By Andrea Champlin I remember when we took our first baby home from the hospital. I desperately wished there was a handbook or manual that we could follow.You know, if they cry, check these three things. I had no idea what I was doing. I’d spent so much time reading about pregnancy and childbirth, that I kind of forgot to read anything about what to do after the baby got here. Somehow we made through, and enjoyed being parents so much we had two more babies. 32 WINC. | August 2019
Fast forward a few years and my oldest will soon start her second year of middle school. Things are certainly different these days with social media and the internet. Anything goes and everything is ok in this topsy turvy world. How do you teach your child, in a loving way, to be in the world, and not of the world? How do you get your children to talk to you about life’s most intimate questions, instead going to their friends? How do you teach them about morality and values in a loving way, without seeming like you’re completely out of step with the times? We first started talking about the
hard stuff when my daughter was 8. I read a book, that I highly recommend for tweens, called “Six Ways to Keep the Little in Your Girl” by Dannah Gresh. It changed the way I parent. She also has a book for boys. There were lots of changes when we hit middle school and the Christian program, Passport to Purity, for girls and boys ages 10-12, was just what I was looking for. Several of my friends have done this program with their children. I took my daughter, Annabel, away for a weekend in Bentonville so we could have some big conversations with Passport to Purity as our guide. So what does Passport to Purity cover? Well, pretty much everything that will make you blush: peer pressure, puberty, dating, and sex. And I’ll be honest, this mama had to shut the book the first time I started reading it and go get a glass of wine. I tried again the next night when I was more mentally prepared. It’s not the text that’s disturbing, it’s the thought of discussing the text with my 10-year-old that caused me to almost hyperventilate. My parents NEVER discussed any of this with me. Anything I learned I had to learn from a book, sex ed class, or my peers. Talking to my daughter about these things, instead of ignoring it and trying to hide it from her as long as possible, was very counterintuitive for me. But I also knew that I wanted a totally different relationship with my daughter than I had with my mother. So I prepared. I read the book and listened to the five sessions of information before we left on our Passport to Purity weekend. I also prepared the projects suggested. There are five sessions and the book gives a schedule on when to do each one, which we followed. Passport to Purity calls for a weekend away with your child, with one fun event to break up the conversation during the weekend. We’d originally settled on Dallas, but I quickly realized that most of our time would be spent talking in our hotel room. So we changed our plans to the much closer Bentonville and the Crystal Bridges Museum. We left on a Friday afternoon and listened to part of the introduction CD on the way there. We did the rest of Session 1 (Introduction) and Session 2 (Peer Pressure) after we got to the hotel, and then headed out for sushi. If there’s one thing my girl loves, it’s sushi. On Saturday morning, you need to get an early start. The schedule recommended getting started at 8:30, but we didn’t get started until 9:00. Session Three (Puberty) and Session Four (Sex) are the heaviest womensinc.net 33
sessions. There’s a lot of information and a lot of discussion. At one point Annabel was lying down on the sofa with a pillow over her face. It’s just a lot of information. At 12:15 and Annabel was so hungry and overloaded with information that we headed to our restaurant for lunch without doing the optional 20 minute session that I had planned to do. Luckily, I had my airpods, so we each put one in our ear and listened to the session while in the Eleven restaurant at the Crystal Bridges Museum. It was actually pretty nice. We held hands at the table, looked at the beautiful view, and finished the session before our lunch arrived. After touring the museum, we went shopping at a local mall and picked up some fun things. The main thing is to do something your daughter enjoys and spend time together. We went back to the hotel and did our final session, Session 5 (Dating), before our dinner reservation. This session defines dating as when a boy and girl are alone together. It also defines the purpose of dating as finding a spouse. My head almost exploded this year when Annabel told me some of her friends were dating. I quickly
realized that we did not have the same definition of dating. At the end of this lesson there is a “Wait to Date” contract for your pre-teen to sign. It basically says that she agrees to wait to date until her dad and I think she’s mature enough. Annabel reluctantly signed it; even at 10 she thinks she’s ready to date. Her father and I disagree. The book also suggests giving a present as a memento for the weekend. I struggled with this. A lot of parents give a purity ring, but I didn’t want to do that. I just feel like it’s too much pressure. So I gave Annabel a ring that her father had given to me while we were dating, as a reminder of the love, admiration, and respect her father and I have for each other. We want her, and our sons, to settle for nothing less. I once got some advice that the key to being a confidante of your child is to remain calm, no matter what they tell you. I really try my best to follow this advice. For example, my daughter has a ten minute bus ride after school every day.You wouldn’t think a lot could happen in ten minutes on bus full of fifth graders. But one day, as she got off the bus, she told me that another fifth grader had shown her a pornographic image.
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Now, on the outside, I was calm. On the inside, I was planning the murder of a fifth grade boy that I did not know. I know our conversations are working because Annabel had a friend advise her not to tell me. This friend told Annabel she would get in trouble for seeing it. Thankfully Annabel ignored this advice, came to me, I contacted the school, and the boy was disciplined. He now hides from Annabel. Perfect. I was so proud of Annabel for telling me. You’re not protecting their innocence by not talking to them about pornography, dating, sex, or puberty. Even if you don’t do Passport to Purity, make sure you talk to them. If you don’t, you’re risking their views being shaped by their friends or classmates. Think about it. If your child learns what sex is from peers or during sex ed class at school, where do you think they’re going to go if they have questions or are confused about something? Most likely not you. Talk to your kids. I know it’s uncomfortable, but you have to do it anyway. And you have to do it earlier than you think you should. If you’re not talking to them, I promise, the world is. Some days I still feel like we’re just home from the hospital and I have no idea what I’m doing, but we just keep plugging along, doing the best we can. And that’s all you can do.
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A Look Back...
Exceptional Men in Education By Cindy Beckman It’s been said it takes a village to raise a child and many dedicated individuals have devoted lifetimes to ensure the children of Conway and surrounding areas received a good education. Community leaders also invested time, effort and money into making sure those schools (and colleges) were well equipped to meet the needs of the students.That tradition continues and is one of the big reasons people move their families here. As another school year gets underway and children return to their classrooms, here’s a look back at some of the men who helped develop Conway’s great school system.The district honored each by naming a school building for them. Carl W. Stuart (1923-1993) served as principal of Conway High School for six years before becoming the district’s superintendent in 1969. Mr. Stuart was superintendent during the entire time I attended Conway schools and was also my first boss when I became a teacher in the district in 1985. In 1988, the district recognized his service by naming a new middle school after him. In 1993, the new elementary school in west Conway was named after Jim Stone, long-time educator in the district. Mr. Stone served as a principal of Conway Middle School and Conway Junior High before becoming assistant superintendent. Many teachers will remember his professional development classes during the Program for Effective Teaching (PET) era. In those classes, teachers all learned to “monitor and adjust.” Stone was inducted into the Conway Public School Foundation’s Hall of Honor in 2019. The next year, another new elementary school in east Conway was named for veteran educator, Theodore Jones (1924-1999), who taught agriculture at Pine Street High School for 16 years 36 WINC. | August 2019
and then served as the school’s principal until it closed in 1970. He then taught career orientation at Conway Junior High until his retirement in 1985.While in his career orientation class, I applied for my first Social Security card. In those days one did not need a card until you were old enough be employed. Bob Courtway (1927-1997), Hendrix College coach and athletic director until 1992, served on the Conway School District Board of Education. He started the high school swim team and organized the program which offered swimming lessons to all third graders in the district. Bob Courtway Middle School was named in his honor in 1997 but was recently renamed Bob and Betty Courtway Middle School to honor his wife who taught kindergarten in Conway for many years. In 2006, a new intermediate school was named the Raymond and Phyllis Simon Intermediate (now Middle) School after a couple who had invested most of their life in education. Mr. Simon served as Conway’s assistant superintendent for finance and then as superintendent from 1991 to 1997. He then was Director of the Arkansas Department of Education from 1997 until 2004 when he became U.S. Deputy Secretary of Education. He was inducted into the Conway Public School’s Hall of Honor in 2014. Woodrow “Woody” Cummins was honored in 2008 when a new elementary school in west Conway was named for him. He was the district’s first special education teacher and then served as principal of Ellen Smith Elementary, Conway Middle School and Conway Junior High. He briefly served as assistant superintendent of support services and federal programs before joining Worthen National Bank of Conway in the mid-1980s. In 1994, Cummins came back to education as UCA Director of Development. Later, he served as state deputy director of education under Ray Simon. He became a financial consultant with
Photo courtesy of Conway Public Schools
Carl Stuart
Photo courtesy of Conway Public School Foundation
Jim Stone
Photo courtesy of Anthony Hoskins, Pine Street Museum
Theodore Jones
Photo courtesy of conwaypedia.net
Bob Courtway
Stephens, Inc. after leaving the Arkansas Department of Education. In 2015, he was inducted into the Conway Public School Foundation’s Hall of Honor. In April 2019, the Conway Board of Education renamed Florence Mattison Elementary, which opened in 1981, to honor the educational contributions Mrs. Mattison’s husband, Preston, also made to the district. Preston Mattison was the principal of Pine Street School from 1923 to 1947. Preston and Florence met while at Philander Smith College, marrying in 1916. In the early 1920s, they came to Conway. She taught at the school where he was principal. In addition to the schools named to honor former educators, Conway School District has also honored other men by naming facilities in their honor. James H. Clark (1930-2019), for whom the district auditorium was named, served as coach, high school principal and finally superintendent before retiring in 1991.
Cindy Beckman is a local freelance writer. She writes A Look Back, a weekly Tuesday column; A Look Forward, a bimonthly Sunday column; and the daily Yesterdays column for the Log Cabin. She has also authored several local history books and articles. She may be reached at beckman@windstream.net
Photo courtesy of Conway Public School Foundation
Ray Simon
photo courtesy of Arkansas State Archives
Preston Mattison
Photo courtesy of Conway Public School Foundation
Woodrow Cummins
Photo courtesy of Conway Public School
James Clark
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Conversations with a
Katya (Ligon) and Jeff Pitchford Children: Lizzie and Sophi Ligon 11 and 9 years old Schools: Ruth Doyle and Woodrow Cummins schools. During summers girls go to various educational camps at the University of Arkansas and complete one research project. “They always complain about it, but they learn a ton, even during summer!” Katya says, “I am always busy. I thought I ll have a lot of free time after completing my Ph. D In Leadership from UCA, but I am as busy as I was 2 years ago. I guess I tend to over schedule myself a lot!” Q: What’s the last music you listened to as a family while driving? A: Bon Jovi Q: What’s your guilty pleasure? A: Cheese Q: What’s the one thing in your home you want to get rid of but that your spouse won’t allow? A: We do not have a home together yet. But when we ll merge into one living accommodation, my Grey living room couch will have to get lost and the king bed that he has will be coming to the new home. Q: Who is your favorite animated character? A: Belle from the Beauty and the Beast. Q: What are you most passionate about? A: Education and expending international boundaries of the mindset... I hope my story creates interest for young people, my students, to learn about other cultures and countries. All countries are interconnected in today’s world so appreciation for various cultures helps decrease ethnocentrism and build stronger international connections on various levels. 38 WINC. | August 2019
Q: What is the furthest you’ve been from home and why? A: Arkansas – my home town is Dnipropetrovsk, Ukraine. From Arkansas home – it will be Italy, where I am right now on my honeymoon ... I am responding from Florence Q: Do you prefer mountains or the beach? A: Mountains Q: Who do you most admire? A: My grandmother, Alexandria she was a strong intelligent woman with incredible tactful and negotiation skills. She lost her mother, Elizabeth during Ukrainian Holodomor and was raised with her sister Maria by their father Kirill, who never remarried. Alexandria was a nurse during World War II and traveled from Dnipropetrovsk to Berlin with the Red army; later she received doctor of medicine in physical therapy degree and became hospital administrator. She was my father’s mother. Q: Which is your favorite restaurant in town? A: Market Place Q: Is your family more Elvis or Beatles?
A: Elvis, our first dance as a married couple was “can’t help falling in love with you” Q: Who is the better driver? A: Jeff is Q: Who is the calmest? A: Jeff is Q: What is your family’s favorite hobby? A: Playing Chinese checkers or exploring existing places Q: Where do you go to church? A: The church of Rock Creek In LR Q: What is your favorite memory as a family? A: Visiting Ukraine with my family and introducing them to my Ukrainian family members – they never met before, talking to my school teachers, touring my school, university and eating incredible Ukrainian food. Cody Sublett is a native to Faulkner County. He is a local business owner and enjoys sharing the personalities of the people he meets. Whether it is another small business owner or a family he has had the pleasure of working for, the Cadron Creek Craftsman is happy to share a little bit about the people who make Central Arkansas unique and diverse.
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The Majestic Mama: Acrylic Tray with Resin By Andrea Champlin My daughter has started to acquire a lot of jewelry, and I thought it might be nice to have something to put her favorite pieces in on her dresser. I found this cute little acrylic tray at a local store that was the perfect size, but it was a little too boring for my vibrant tweenager. So I decided to give it a little makeover. Using paint and resin I turned this plain acrylic tray into functional art.You can do it too! This project includes resin, but don’t let that scare you. The brand I used was very easy to work with. You Will Need: Acrylic Tray Acrylic Paint Floetrol mixing cups popsicle sticks rubbing alcohol small paintbrush metal leaf adhesive (I use Mona Lisa adhesive size) rose gold foil resin (I use Art Resin) small culinary blow torch 40 WINC. | August 2019
Instructions: 1. First, clean your acrylic tray. I used rubbing alcohol. 2. Mix your acrylic paint with floetrol. I used pink, blue, yellow, red and lime green.You want your paint to be the consistency of syrup, because you want it to flow across your acrylic tray. 3.Pour paint. Now here’s where you can experiment. I don’t have photos of this in process (worst blogger ever), because this result is about the twelfth time I poured the paint in. If you don’t like what your paint is doing, simply remove the paint with a paper towel, rinse with water, and start over.You may need to clean the sides with rubbing alcohol. 4. Tilt your tray so the paint moves and completely covers the bottom of the tray. 5. Let dry in a covered area. I put mine in a box.You want to do this because the paint will take a couple days to dry and you don’t want something to get stuck in the paint. I may or may not have had to remove a gnat out of my paint with a toothpick because my box wasn’t closed all the way. 6. After it’s dry, use a small paintbrush and brush metal leaf adhesive on areas you want to accent. 7. Apply rose gold leaf (or silver or gold). Brush off excess. 8. Once this is completely dry, mix your art resin according to package instructions. 9. Pour resin over paint. Tilt tray and use a popsicle stick to push resin to the edges. 10. Use a torch and gently go over the resin to remove air bubbles. This will ensure it dries crystal clear. 11. Cover and dry. Follow drying times on resin instructions. And there you go. This project will take a few day because of drying time, but I love this tray now! In fact, I liked it so much I decided to keep it in my bedroom! It was so easy, I’m going to make another one for my daughter. Some of the products I’ve used for this project can be found on my blog, TheMajesticMama.com. womensinc.net 41
It’s Game Time amazing there is no place for filters or enhanced images in real estate photography. You need professional, staged images The pressure to “keep up with the that accurately portray your property’s Joneses” is very real in today’s world. But when putting your house on the market to size and features. You have one shot to make a good and lasting impression on a sell you don’t want to “keep up” want to potential buyer. Ninety-nine percent of “out shine” those Joneses. If your goal is to get a quick sale for the the time that one shot is going to be the photos of your home listed online. It is the most money then you’re going to have to get a game plan. But before you stress out, photos of the home that will entice potential buyers to come look at it in person. just keep reading. ERA TEAM Real Estate Since good photography plays such an has a proven five-step plan for serious important role in getting your property sellers. So, get your game face on and let’s noticed, ERA TEAM Real Estate only play! works with the top local professionals to photograph our listings. Listings with STEP 1: STAGING high-quality photography sell 32% faster Home staging is one of the hottest than the competition and often for more trends in real estate- because it works! money! According to Real Estate Staging Association, homes that are professionally staged STEP 3: PRICE spend 73% less time on the market. In real estate, we have what is called the So, what is staging? I’m so glad you asked! There is a huge difference in staging “kiss of death”. This is when a property has sat on the market for months on end vs. decorating. People decorate their homes to suit their personal taste. Staging creating the perception to buyers that there must be something wrong with the is the opposite. When a home is staged property when in fact it just isn’t priced correctly potential buyers are able to see right. the function of the room and therefore The correct pricing of a property is able to envision how they would use and / multifaceted. There are multiple factors that or decorate the space. Staging is showing directly affect the proper pricing of a home. the functionality of a room by using the A well trained real estate agent will know most neutral pieces on display. You want that in order to help advise and guide you to give potential buyers the ability to see to properly price your property they will their vision for that space rather than be need to do a CMA (Comparative Market distracted by your style of decorating. Analysis). A CMA takes all surrounding Not as easy as it sounds folks. Now, and necessary factors in to account when the majority of the time you have to pay estimating a fair price range. Factors such for this professional service. But, you are as neighborhood, home updates, square in luck!! ERA TEAM Real Estate not only trains their agents on staging but they also footage, etc. ERA TEAM Real Estate offers have two in house certified staging agents. all potential sellers FREE CMAs! Oh, it gets better… and this professional STEP 4: Game Face service is FREE to our sellers!! A 2018 If a seller is serious about wanting to get survey found that 85% of staged homes his property sold then that seller needs to sold for 6-25% more than their unstaged be ready at a moment’s notice for agents neighbors. to show the home. This means that the sellers are going to have to double up on STEP 2: Professional Photos cleaning chores or hire a cleaning service These days everyone with a cell phone thinks they are a professional photogoften because keeping your home “show rapher. While technology and filters are ready” is vital to a quick and easy sale. By Morgan Tidwell
42 WINC. | August 2019
Flexibility of the seller during the time the property is listed is also very important. Being able to vacate the home quickly for potential buyers is necessary to sell. A missed showing is a missed opportunity to sell your home. If you set too many restrictions on when it’s available to view, busy buyers will simply skip over your listing and move on to the Joneses next door. STEP 5: Marketing You will find that many agents are still marketing their listings the same way they did 20 years ago… put a sign in the yard, put the listing on the MLS and pray it sells. Well, this just isn’t going to fly for serious sellers. 93% of buyers search for real estate listings online! That is why ERA TEAM Real Estate invests in a marketing plan created by our marketing team called “Marketing to Move” for each and every listing. To ensure your listing appears in the places where buyers are most likely to look, our multi-level promotion strategy includes pre-launch activities designed to seed the marketplace as well as post-listing activities and tools to ensure that your listing stays top-of-mind with potential buyers. By utilizing online and social marketing platforms to connect with consumers and offline channels to connect with local real estate agents, your property gets maximum exposure to prospective buyers. If you are serious about listing your home then call ERA TEAM Real Estate today. We are a company of highly trained and educated professionals ready to advise, guide, negotiate for and protect you through your selling process. So, no more “keeping up with the Joneses”, it’s game time and we’ve come to win!! ERA TEAM Real Estate 1600 Dave Ward Drive Suite A7 Conway, AR 72034 501.327.6731 www.erateamrealestate.com
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Celebrating Our #1 In 2018, Conway Regional was named #1 in Central Arkansas for
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