Volume 10, Issue 12 - THe Human Toll by Long Island Press

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Cherrywood Foot Care A BREAKTHROUGH LASER

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TREATMENT FOR TOENAIL FUNGUS Many people suffer from a condition called Onychomycosis (on-ni-koh-my-ko-sis), which is better known as toenail fungus. This condition is noticeable by a thickened, yellow or cloudy appearance of an individual’s toenail plate. The toenail can become rough and crumbly or can separate from the nail bed. There is usually no pain or other bodily symptoms unless the disease is severe. The condition can often affect a person’s ability to enjoy the simple things in life such as going barefoot or wearing sandals. Is there hope for sufferers of this condition? Cherrywood Foot Care in Nassau County has just introduced a medical breakthrough by offering the newest in laser technology for toenail fungus: the Cool Breeze Laser. Cherrywood Foot Care, led by founder Dr. Joseph Burke, has been a part of the Long Island community for over 24 years. They offer quality medical and surgical foot care. The facility features cuttingedge emerging technologies such as a diagnostic ultrasound and a state-ofthe-art operating room on premise and this new laser treatment for toenail fungus. Dr. Burke and his qualified staff have the most advanced training and use the most advanced techniques in the treatment of this condition and your entire foot and ankle healthcare. Cherrywood Foot Care and Dr. Burke are leading the industry with this revolutionary treatment that quite simply can eliminate toenail fungus. The laser treatment destroys pathogens that cause toenail fungus. This is a serious and powerful medical advancement that the public needs to learn more about. This revolutionary new laser treatment appears more effective than all previous treatment options. Laser therapy for toenail fungus is completely safe, painless and has no side effects. In most cases, usually only one treatment is needed. This treatment leaves patients with a significant improvement in the health and appearance of their toenails. The laser operates in a very tight spectrum of near-infrared light. The laser light passes through the toenail without causing damage to the nail or the surrounding skin. The beam created by this specially designed medical device

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kills the embedded pathogens in the nail plate and nail bed, leaving normal healthy tissue undamaged. Only minimal adverse reactions, injuries, disabilities or side effects have been reported in clinical studies with this new laser technology and treatment. In contrast, topical treatments are minimally effective. “Oral medications available today can cause side effects to the liver, kidney and eyes, and may even affect your senses of taste and smell,” states Dr. Burke. At the time of the procedure, the toenail will not become instantly clear, it takes time to grow out. A new healthy nail will be seen emerging from the cuticle area as the nails grow naturally. The average toenail replaces itself every six to nine months. Within one to three months of the procedure, a healthy new growth will be visible. The laser treatment is very effective, according to clinical studies performed in Sacramento, Calif. Most patients experience significant improvement. In most cases, the fungal nails are improved with a single treatment. The vast majority of our clients require only one treatment, which usually takes about 30 minutes. No anesthetic or injections are ever used and you will be able to resume all of your normal activities immediately after the treatment is done. It is recommended that after the treatment (just like you practice good oral hygiene to keep your teeth and gums healthy), you will need to practice good foot hygiene to keep your toenails healthy. Find out how to end your struggle with toenail fungus by visiting Cherrywoodfootcare.com or call Dr. Joseph Burke for a free consultation. Their professional medical staff will help you to feel welcome, relaxed and comfortable with a caring office experience. Cherrywood Foot Care can have you barefoot and smiling with confidence once again with this revolutionary new laser technology. It can eliminate unsightly toenail fungus giving you clear healthy toenails with an affordable one-time treatment! Put your “Best” foot forward.Call us today to see why we were voted #1 BEST Podiatrist On Long Island!

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Sound Smart at a Party Israel recently passed a law banning the use of underweight models in advertising and fashion shows. Models now must have a body mass index (BMI) of no less than 18.5, and will have to provide up-to-date medical proof of their weight when they go on jobs. The new law also requires advertisements to state whether an image has been altered to make the models appear thinner. Supporters of the bill believe that the constant images of extreme thinness are a major reason for eating disorders in young girls… A new study suggests that male humans aren’t the only ones who turn to the bottle after a dry spell. Researchers took thousands of male fruit flies and put them each into a container with a female that had just mated. When the male fly would try to get it on with her, she was clearly not in the mood: she would run away, kick the male and stick out her egg-laying organ to hold him off. These male flies went through three hour-long sessions of this rejection for four straight days, and afterwards were put in vials and given a choice of regular food or food laced with alcohol. Researchers found that the sexually frustrated males went for the alcohol more than the male flies

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single or multiple pulses, the tat could theoretically do different things for that had just mated did. Interestingly messages, e-mails and phone calls. No enough, after those flies were able to word yet on what would happen if you hang out with some receptive females, decided to change providers… their hankering for alcohol declined. Scientists believe that this is because Looters will hit up anything, there is a substance in the fly brain including a sunken cruise ship. called NPF, and its activity is boosted Underwater scuba thieves were able after pleasurable activities. The flies to slip by the Italian Coast Guard and that weren’t getting any had to seek the laser systems set up to measure other pleasurable activities like alcohol to make up for the deficit. If this turns out to be true in humans as well, the study may help scientists find new medications to fight alcoholism…

Phone company Nokia recently filed for a patent on tattoos that would sense when your cell phone is ringing. The technology would use metal ores inserted under the skin during a minor surgical procedure. Once activated, the “tattoo” would vibrate when the phone rings or when the battery is running low. Users would then have the option of scratching their arm to ignore the alerts. The company said that by using different sequences of

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minute shifts of the Costa Concordia shipwreck plus the police’s 24-hour surveillance to snatch a symbolic piece of the wreckage. Prosecutors are now investigating who may have stolen the ship’s bell, which is etched with the ship’s name and 2006, the year it was launched. The Costa Concordia killed at least 25 people when it capsized off the Tuscan island of Giglio after hitting a rock in January…

“It’s about kids in a horrible situation and there’s this girl who overcomes it and gives hope to everyone and they come together to do something about it.”

—actor Liam Hemsworth on the plot of his new film. Here he attends a special screening of the Hunger Games hosted by The Cinema Society and Calvin Klein Collection at SVA Theatre on Tuesday, March 20, 2012 in New York. (AP Photo/Evan Agostini)

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Windmill, Don’t Drill Dear Editor: Those with the “drill, drill, drill” mentality are either ignorant that we do not need more oil or are being purposely manipulated and used as shills by the big-oil conglomerates in order to increase their already unprecedented prodigious profits. Our country has a surplus of oil. Oil demand in our country is the lowest it has been in the last 10 years. In fact, since 1908 the United States has been exporting oil to countries such as Brazil, Mexico and Chile. Prior to that we had consumed all the gas we produced plus imported gas. Production is up, consumption is down and our oil surplus grows as does our export of it. Despite these

facts, our drill-aholics claim we need to “drill, drill, drill” for more, more, more oil to make us less, less, less dependent on foreign imported oil. More than mere nonsense, it is an outright lie. By repeating the misleading mantra, Obama is responsible for the high cost of gas, it has duped much of our population, vis-à-vis they hope, voters. Add to that the controversial Keystone XL pipeline. There seems to be as much of a surplus of misinformation concerning this potential disaster as there is the ever-increasing surplus of oil in our country. The TransCanada pipeline carrying heavy tar sands crude oil crossing our country from Alberta to Port Arthur, Texas, on the Gulf is not for American consumption at the gas pumps. Its oil will be refined and exported, and since the refinery is within a Foreign Trade Zone, the oil companies will accomplish their export strategy, tax-free. The only entity that would profit is the already super-profiteering oil giants. All this begs the question: Why are we all lamenting the need to import that evil foreign oil on which we are “dependent” when we have more than enough produced in our own country to satisfy our own needs? Obviously it’s rhetoric, since one need look no further than who is profiting by this ruse and who are their “drill, drill, drill” political beneficiaries. The disgusting fraud is perpetrated on our country by profit-motivated Wall Street traders and financial speculators. They purposely manipulate the price of oil to keep it high. Our enemy is not overseas, but within. The ultimate solution: Think Green! Nicholas Zizelis, Amagansett

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Take a Bite Out of Cop Crime Dear Shelly Feuer Domash: Without disputing your analogy of “a few rotten apples” [March 8 editorial] in the Nassau County Police Department, I still wonder who would want to drink the juice squeezed from a barrel of apples that contained “only a few” rotten ones? And how many “rotten apples” were part of the malfeasance that went on for years in the Police Crime Lab? And why haven’t I read about even one of those lab workers or supervisors being fired for what they did or should have done? Why hasn’t the lab’s director for all those years—or former Police Commissioner Lawrence Mulvey—been brought to justice for all the wrongdoing they allowed to go on in that lab, which is now costing law-abiding taxpayers millions of extra dollars? Richard Siegelman, Plainview

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The Target

Bloomberg—off target NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg outlaws food donations to homeless shelters because the city cannot assess the foods’ salt, fat and fiber content. Let them eat cake!

berg

Bloom

jets—off target After missing out on Peyton Manning, the J-E-T-S pull off—and then pull out of—a trade for the guy Manning will unseat in Denver: polarizing fundamentalist icon/ terrible quarterback Tim Tebow. As they say: If you can’t garner headlines by, y’know, actually winning, your next best bet is just to do the craziest, stupidest thing possible and force the Mets-Madoff scandal off the back page!

Jets NYT k

oo Faceb

LiLo

NYT—partial score A year after The New York Times puts up a pay wall on its website, the company announces it will now charge visitors to the site for access after they have viewed 10 pages, instead of the previous 20. For us journalists, this is sort of a good-news/bad-news thing: Good news because now newspapers might have a new revenue source! Bad news because now we can’t afford to read The New York Times!

Facebook—off target Some employers are now asking potential hires for their Facebook username and password in order to access their private profiles and vet applicants. If we’re going to be turned down for a job just because we “Like” Cougar Town… well, we didn’t want that job anyway! LiLo—partial score After last week’s hit-and-run incident which the actress says was staged, Lindsay Lohan decides to put herself under house arrest until her probation is officially over at the end of March to avoid any more potential probation violations. Well, it can’t be any less effective than all the times she’s been arrested by law enforcement! BK—off target Bobbi Kristina is seen wearing her mom’s diamond ring, as she dates—and reportedly gets engaged to— her adopted brother Nick Gordon, whom Whitney Houston had taken in and raised with her daughter when he was 12 years old and Bobbi was 10. Good to know growing up in that household didn’t mess them up at all!

The Pink Slip GEORGE ZIMMERMAN The facts are clear: George Zimmerman, a former Marine who flopped out of service with an “other than honorable discharge,” had been arrested twice in 2005 for resisting arrest and domestic violence, and was a fanatic wanna-be cop who took his neighborhood watch volunteer role obsessively—calling police 46 times since January 2011, reporting everything from open windows to break-ins. Last month, he shot and killed unarmed 17-year-old Trayvon Martin as he walked back to his father’s fiancee’s house carrying a bag of Skittles and an iced tea. Bad enough a Sanford, Fla., dispatcher told the vigilante not to follow the kid he’d deemed “suspicious.” Bad enough he still hasn’t been arrested. But for Zimmerman and police to justify the murder as “selfdefense” is just too much, even with the Sunshine State’s twisted Stand Your Ground law—which in 2005 changed Floridians’ responsibility to retreat from confrontations and gave them a green-light to shoot if they felt threatened. That rationale simply doesn’t apply here. Zimmerman, 28, hunted the teen down! He was the attacker, not Martin! Arguably, the youth’s shooting Zimmerman would have had better justification and protection under the law. Zimmerman, your severe psychosis alone is enough to warrant your eternal incarceration, but the Sanford police chief and Florida Legislature are equally as warped and deserving of similar fates… You’re fired, murderer!

The Quote

‘‘All I say is love is wonderful.’’

The Photo The Survivor Tree blossoms, Tuesday, March 20, 2012, at the World Trade Center in New York. One World Trade Center, left, now up to the 93rd floor, is scheduled for completion in 2013. The callery pear, salvaged from the rubble following the attacks of September 11, 2001, was nursed back to health and replanted at the National September 11 Memorial.

—U.S. District Court Judge Jed Rakoff, after reading off the terms of the settlement between Madoff fund trustee Irving Picard and Mets owners Saul Katz and Fred Wilpon, which ended the bitter year-old dispute that could have cost the team a billion dollars but may actually net them $16 n) iha nn Le million when the dust clears. (AP Photo/Mark

The Equation

front page of Daily News Thursday May 15, 2012

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Front page of New York Times sportS section Thursday May 15, 2012

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Guess which one of these newspapers is owned by the same people who own the New York Knicks? P r e s s P l ay

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3. GET YOUR 2012 EMPIRE PASSPORT: Many beaches begin charging this weekend and you don’t want to be one of the people cursing how you’re being charged up to $9 to walk the boardwalk in March, yes MARCH. Pay for the season upfront during your next trip to the local park and this annual pass will get you unlimited vehicle entry to almost all of New York State parks—more than 200 locations including beaches, forests and trails—all for $65 and it’s good until the end of March 2013. It’s a pretty sweet deal. 4. WATCH THE SEASON PREMIERE OF MAD MEN: The competitive, cutthroat lifestyle of the 1960s Madison Avenue advertising agency returns for your viewing pleasure, when the award-winning drama comes back for a fifth season. Falling behind? Never watched? No worries, the show is available on box set DVDs/ Blu-rays, as well as on Netflix. So play catch up this week and tune in to AMC at 9 p.m. on March 25. 5. RESERVE YOUR SPOT AT THE ULTIMATE MARVEL MOVIE MARATHON: Avenge until you can’t feel your legs. Starting at 11:30 a.m. on May 3, a slew of AMC theaters will host a marathon, leading up to the midnight release of The Avengers. For only $40, fans can see Iron Man, The Incredible Hulk, Thor and Captain America before the premiere. With the latter three in 3-D, you’ll be sure to get plenty of bangs for your buck. Tickets are on sale now at www.amctheaters.com.

6. LISTEN TO THE MARS VOLTA’S NOCTOURNIQUET: While early reviews continue to pour in, fans and new listeners alike can be sure to expect the signature schizophrenia the band has become infamous for; however, that’s not all they should anticipate. The band has shown a lot of growth in their songwriting, and has often spoken of simpler song structuring and different arrangements in interviews. The alternative/progressive rock outfit will release their sixth studio album on March 27. But, in the mean time… 7. JOIN DAYTROTTER: Daytrotter.com offers exclusive sessions of upcoming and emerging artists with users able to download multiple uploads per day. Each session is complete with custom artwork portraying the performance. The site has hosted many underground and critically revered artists, including Bon Iver, Wilco, Pete Yorn, Thrice, The Ting Tings, and Death Cab for Cutie. You can sign up for a free one-week trial on the site, and after that membership is still dirt cheap at only $2 a month. 8. EAT OUT DURING HAMPTONS RESTAURANT WEEK: Through March 25, participating restaurants (www.hamptonsrestaurantweek.com) will feature three-course meals for a fixed rate set between $19.95 and $24.95. Wineries are also offering discounts ranging from 15 to 20 percent off tastings, bottles and cases; and lodgings are offering specials and discounts on accommodations. 9. BUY LI DUCKS TICKETS: Game tickets for the 2012 season go on sale at 10 a.m. March 24 at Bethpage Ballpark, with players, coaches, QuackerJack, B-103, and tons of festivities. The line has already formed as of Wednesday. Stocked with a tent, sleeping bags, and plenty of food and water, the Kamer family arrived 75 hours early to stake their claim as “first fans in line” at 7 a.m.! 10. BEWARE MERCURY: Mercury is in retrograde til April 4. Scientifically, this means the planet can get ahead of the sun in orbit. Astrologically speaking, it means confusion down here on Earth, making it a bad time to write letters, form contracts, send text messages, drive, talk and basically leave your house. News

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2. DRAW YOUR BEST BATMAN: With The Dark Knight Rises coming to theaters this July, Design by Humans, a clothing company specializing in printing unique designs, is giving fans a chance to become directly attached to the Batman legacy. Through April 11, fans can submit their Batman designs for a chance at a cash prize and more. Franchise director Christopher Nolan will choose three winners. For details, head over to designbyhumans.com and click on The Dark Knight Rises promotion.

The Rundown

1. BID ON LADY GAGA’S MONSTER MASK: … or Bob Dylan’s Harmonica, Rihanna’s shawl, Justin Timberlake’s beanie, Katy Perry’s bodysuit, Neil Young’s guitar strap, Elizabeth Taylor’s beaded gown, Princess Diana’s hair pin, and a whole bunch of other really cool stuff featured in the Rock & Roll Pop Culture Auction running online from March 21-30. And while Gaga’s mask begins at $800 and Dylan’s harmonica at a cool $1,000, there are items that start as low as $50. Check out the goods at www.gottahaverockandroll.com.

The Book Fiction Noir: Thirteen Stories Multiple Authors Intense guilt brought Viola to the ledge of a 20-story building. She stood there wondering if anyone will miss her while contemplating the broken promises and lost hope that dominated her life. Does she jump? Characters throughout Fiction Noir: Thirteen Stories flirt with the dark side and find themselves contemplating life and death. Visiting the evil past of Nazi atrocities through the eyes of a 10-year-old child. Hiring killers to secure their futures. Cooking up schemes to fulfill their needs. Using their wiles to face down gangsters. Exploring the consequences of bad decisions. Avoiding the murderous ways of spies. Planning spousal murder. Solving crimes through careful inquisition. Exploiting the weaknesses of village losers. Protecting the innocent. And fighting organized crime in Sin City. This anthology, published by Hen House Press, can best be described as somewhere between pulp fiction and film noir, filled with intense stories, strong and dramatic narrative, compelling dialogue…and more than just a hint of the dark side. —Daphne Livingston

The average number of text messages sent and received by each teen per day in the United States, according to a new report from the Pew Research Center.

B-List B-Day JENNIFER “I CARRIED A WATERMELON” GREY March 26, 1960 Jennifer Grey AKA Baby, star of ’80s cult classic Dirty Dancing, is an Aries, an adventurous fire sign. While she started out wearing Keds and anklelength skirts, Grey soon embraced the fire inside, dancing in stilettos and a bra with Patrick Swayze. An Aries will go anywhere and do anything, like running with the bulls in Spain, climbing Mount Everest—or playing Canasta in the Catskills. Those born under Aries are prone to romantic turmoil—like defying Daddy and sneaking off to Johnny Castle’s cabin. A sign of action, the Aries woman refuses to sit idle while the world flies by—or while the entire Kellerman lodge sings “Voices, Hearts and Hands” when they should be getting down and dirty to “Time of My Life.” And when Grey takes the stage, she doesn’t just stick the lift, balancing on Johnny’s strong man-hands without falling head-first into the dessert table, she proves to all the signs of the zodiac why you should never doubt the Aries fire—or put Baby in a corner.

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Off the Reservation BY Jed Morey, Publisher, Long Island press Facebook.com/JedMorey

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From Watergate to Occupy “It’s a mess.” This was the sentiment offered by Bob Woodward at a Hofstra University luncheon on Tuesday when asked to describe the current political environment. After his flight was delayed by fog in New York for the better part of the morning, Woodward was late in joining the other half of the famous Woodward and Bernstein duo at the podium in the University Club. The hour prior to his arrival was the Carl Bernstein show as he regaled the packed room of attendees with stories of their travails in journalism during a road show marking the 40th anniversary of the Watergate affair. The luncheon was part of a series of high-profile political events Hofstra is hosting for the student body, as well as the greater Long Island community, culminating in the second presidential debate to be held there this fall. For his part, Bernstein was also chagrined at the state of politics today and his anecdotes were didactic in this regard. He broke through the haze of mythology that over time has shrouded

the Watergate story and boiled it down to the simple premise that no one is above the law and the entire system of democracy must function properly in order for this notion to be upheld. It was the latter sentiment that hung in the air like the fog that had held Woodward at bay on the tarmac for hours. Time has benefitted both men by allowing them to evaluate Watergate through the backward lens of history. Stepping away from their youthful selves (they were in their late twenties when they broke the story that catapulted them to the top of their newspaper careers), they even reevaluated some of their own beliefs such as the pardoning of Richard Nixon by his VP/successor Gerald Ford, a move that arguably cost him the election to Jimmy Carter. Bernstein recalled telephoning Woodward early that morning in 1974, saying “the son of a bitch pardoned the son of a bitch.” What he once viewed as ignominious Bernstein now considers magnanimous as Ford

believed this was the best way to heal the nation from its “long nightmare,” no matter the consequences to his presidency. Subtle reflections and anecdotes aside, the afternoon offered a glimpse into the thoughts of two devout Washington insiders who have witnessed a sea change in American politics. To be clear, these are not two old curmudgeons touting the “things ain’t what they used to be” line. They deftly fielded questions about new media and the surge of information as well as our ability to process the constant onslaught of news and commentary today. And while they were genuinely hopeful that their efforts four decades ago could be replicated by today’s reporters, they were less sanguine about whether the political climate existed to allow journalism to flourish and find its natural audience. The men who brought down one of the most toxic administrations in American history were lamenting the toxic state of today’s political environment. That’s pretty terrible. Bernstein spoke eloquently about the support their reporting received from The Washington Post but was careful to point out that the entire democratic machine had to function properly at every stage of the investigation in order to yield the historic results that it did. From the judicial system that forced President Nixon to hand over his personal tapes to the legislative branch that carried the articles of impeachment against the president, to the protection afforded the journalists in shielding their sources, democracy in all of its glory won the day. But Bernstein argued that it was the people who ultimately played the most critical role in judging the Nixon presidency as even staunch supporters of Nixon and the Republican Party were open enough to review the facts before them and draw their own conclusions. Ultimately, partisanship among the elected and the electorate was cast aside for the greater good. Bernstein went on to argue that money has corrupted the political system beyond recognition. He excoriated the Citizen’s United decision by the U.S. Supreme Court, which allows unlimited contributions from corporations and wealthy individuals in campaigns. Furthermore, he believes the glut and immediacy of information has had the unintended consequence of allowing people to reinforce existing beliefs rather than exposing them to new ideas or multiple sides of a story. The rancor that exists in Washington is a reflection of this phenomenon, and it has created a vicious cycle of partisanship with politicians pandering to the most extreme elements of our

society. It’s mob rule. As to how the system could be fixed, no solutions were offered by either man. Perhaps this is because there are none. The system is broken and I believe it to be irreparable. And that’s okay. Sometimes it’s easier to build anew than to salvage a diseased and crumbling infrastructure. I’m not being pessimistic here, either. To the contrary, I’m fairly optimistic about our chances because I believe the foundation and principles that have guided us to this point are strong enough to endure the collapse and rebirth of a functioning and more equitable system no matter how painful the process may be. This hope derives from the fact that the older generations are the ones who are fixed in their ways and reinforce their existing belief systems no matter how dangerous or antiquated they are. And quite frankly, the answer to this is rather simple math: They have far less time left on the planet than we do. It’s true that they have hoarded the world’s money and resources and polluted the Earth. It’s also true that they have left those in my generation and younger to foot the bill for their greed and consumption. They have “engineered” our food and contaminated our water and established a culture of pharmaceutical addiction. They’ve started wars around the globe in the pursuit of oil by blaming bogeymen while selling themselves as false prophets. Now they have a credibility problem because we no longer believe. And as sure as these are the truths they bequeath to us, so too is the truth that they will all soon be dead. Even the good ones like Woodward and Bernstein cannot escape the inevitable. We can take solace, however, that although we must someday lose them, so too will we rid ourselves of people like the Koch Brothers. Death is funny that way; forever indiscriminate. The youth of today, such as those in the Occupy movement, are wide awake and watching. Six months ago I didn’t believe this to be the case, but it’s real. So to you, Mr. Bernstein, I offer my thanks and some comfort as you and your venerable collaborator enter the winter of your lives. Your wisdom and work have better prepared us for the long, difficult task ahead.

to comment on “Off the Reservation” email jed at JMorey@longislandpress.com

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Jerry’s Ink BY JERRY DELLA FEMINA, Publisher, the Independent

Condoms And Life Savers On Feb. 27, Conan O’Brien opened his show and said, “As of tomorrow, Rick Santorum will be assigned Secret Service agents. Did you know that? Yeah, this is historic: It’s the first time Santorum has agreed to use any kind of protection.” Which brings me to my great marketing insight as to how over-thecounter sales of condoms made Life Savers the most successful and profitable candy brand of the 1950s. In 1957, when a 15- or 16-yearold boy would go into a pharmacy to purchase a box of condoms, it was the most tension-provoking, frightening purchase a young man could make. On one side were his raging hormones. On the other side was the church, the Legion of Decency (a powerful Catholic group), his family, society, censorship—a quietly repressive political climate that sanctimonious politicians used to win votes. It was a world of shame and guilt that Rick Santorum wants to bring back when he’s (don’t laugh) elected. Unlike the giant megastores of today, pharmacies in those days were tiny stores and there was a good chance the proprietor knew your parents. So one would slink in when the owner was out. Head down, you would make it to the front to where the condoms were kept behind the counter. You would look at the floor and mumble. A voice from behind the counter would say, “WHAT?” You then would look up into the eyes of a girl from your school who sat four seats away from you in your social studies class; this was her part-time after-school job. “What would you like?” she would say in a voice so loud you knew your mother sitting in her living room a mile away could hear. “I would like er … er … er … A PACK OF LIFE SAVERS!” I bought hundreds, thousands of packs of Life Savers. I was responsible for a full share point of their national sales. Sexual thoughts and hang-ups in Brooklyn started for a boy with his first kiss. I remember as if it were yesterday. It was summer. I was 12 years old, the most awkward child ever put on this Earth. I took my date (her name was Rose) to the Kingsway Theater on Kings Highway in Brooklyn.

Nervous? My body felt like it had a temperature of 106 degrees. My hands and feet felt 70 degrees colder. I was also nauseous because in preparation for this first “date,” I had brushed my teeth about 20 times and was in danger of dying from an overdose of Colgate toothpaste. Rose thought I was the strong, silent type. Actually, I couldn’t talk because I had a mouth full of Life Savers. I had consumed two packs of Wintergreen Life Savers from the minute I had picked her up at home. We sat in the balcony and I was too shy to put my arm around Rose so I put it around her seat instead. I spent the two hours in pain. My arm had cramped up in this awkward position and then it went to sleep. At one point I realized that I couldn’t move my arm and probably would never be able to move it again. I wondered if it would have to be amputated. This made me giggle hysterically to myself. Unfortunately, I had this thought during a love scene between Esther Williams and Howard Keel. Rose then said her first word of the afternoon to me: “Shuuuussssssh.” Finally, I decided to try to kiss Rose. My dead right arm, which I had counted on for foreplay and balance, was useless. So I had to try to move my body and sort of lurch at the same time. It put me off-balance and, even though I was aiming for her lips, I missed and sort of kissed her on the bridge of her nose and on her right eye. She sort of summed up what my sex life was going to be like forever when she said, “Stop that. We’re gong to miss the good part of the movie.” I may have been 12, but being thrown over for Esther Williams didn’t do much for my sense of self-esteem. It was then I decided to retrieve my right arm, but in order to do that I had to reach over Rose’s head with my left hand and pick up my dead right arm and swing it over her head. My hands were dripping wet with perspiration and I wound up dropping the arm and accidentally hitting her in the top of the head with my dead arm. “What’s wrong with you?” she said, thereby becoming the first person to ask a question that I’ve been asked many times since.

If you wish to comment on “Jerry’s Ink” email Jerry at jerry@dfjp.com

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Corporal Christopher Levi, an Army Ranger, is lucky to have made it back to Long Island alive. The 29-year-old Holbrook man remembers clearly the day in 2008 his legs were blown off, each limb landing on opposite sides of his Humvee when it rolled over an improvised explosive device in Iraq, mangling his right arm. His fatigues ran red with blood. His rifle was destroyed. After a lengthy stay at Walter Reed Army Medical Center in Washington, D.C., Levi now lives at home, where he continues his grueling rehabilitation, learning to walk again with prosthetics. Yet despite losing his legs, Levi seemingly evokes Revolutionary war hero Nathan Hale, who famously said his only regret was that he had but one life to give for his country. “I was a little bit more upset that I wouldn’t be able to rejoin my brothers in this deployment,” Levi told CNN. About 30 Long Islanders were among the estimated 4,500 Americans and more than 100,000 Iraqis who lost their lives

during Operation Iraqi Freedom, which began nine years ago this week, March 19, 2003, with a bombing attack thenPresident George W. Bush called “Shock and Awe.” That small figure neither includes those from LI who died while recovering stateside from injuries suffered in Iraq nor those who took their own lives while struggling with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Far outnumbering those lost are the at least 5,000 Iraq war veterans like Levi, who returned to LI. He is getting treatment, but an untold number of Iraq war veterans are still reluctant to seek help, for whatever reason. Meanwhile, the veterans and families of those lost are trying to ensure that the sacrifices our troops made are not forgotten as our country moves on. The U.S. withdrawal from Iraq on Dec. 18 inspires mixed feelings for Doreen Kenny of Bay Shore, mother of Army Spc. Jacob Fletcher, who parachuted into northern Iraq in the first week of the war. He became the third soldier from LI to die there when he was killed at age 28 by a roadside bomb Nov. 13, 2003. “The impact when they took the American flag down in Bagdad at the closing of the war, it was so bittersweet,” Kenny says through tears. “Sweet in the sense that most of our troops were coming home and I was ever so grateful. And then it became the war that was. The war that I lost my son in.” She copes by continuing her mission as head of nonprofit Jacob’s Light Foundation, which has sent a half million pounds of care packages to soldiers on the front lines over the years. The group is still sending packages to those serving in Afghanistan. Jacob’s Light is one of many places where the legacy of those who paid with their lives in Iraq can be found across LI. Streets, bridges, ball fields, scholarships, nonprofits and an array of buildings from Montauk to Manhasset bare the names of fallen hometown heroes. Northport’s John W. Engeman Theater is named after a chief warrant officer from East Northport who died in Iraq in 2006. One of the rare few to have a New York State law named in their honor is Army Spc. Thomas Wilwerth, a 21-yearold Mastic native who died near Balad, Iraq, on Feb. 22, 2006 when his tank was hit by an IED. “For the family of Specialist Wilwerth, they know that [he] is looking after any future Gold Star Families in New York to allow them to bury their son or daughter with the peace and respect that a fallen service member deserves,” says state Sen. Lee Zeldin (R-Seaford), who authored the Specialist Thomas Wilwerth Military Dignity Act. The term “Gold Star”

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refers to families who’ve lost loved ones in military service. “It gives them even more reason to believe that his sacrifice wasn’t for naught,” the senator says. The Wilwerth law prohibits protests within 2,500 feet of military services, funerals and processions— such as the anti-gay rights protest organized by Westboro Baptist Church, a fringe evangelical group, who appeared at Wilwerth’s funeral waving “God hates fags” signs. Zeldin, a captain in the U.S. Army Reserves, served in Iraq in the summer of 2006. He was fortunate enough to come home in one piece. But he cannot forget watching a friend of his, a platoon leader, being blinded by shrapnel while trying to help one of his men under enemy fire. “It greatly impacted me, seeing how quickly someone who had an entire life before him—an entire life still yet to live—and it was drastically changed in a moment,” Zeldin says. The experience has changed the lives of those who returned home without any visible wounds, too.

BOMBS OVER BAGHDAD

“After a year in Iraq, the worst six months in my life were the six months after I came home,” says Andy Roberts, director of the Rosen Family Wellness Center at North Shore-Long Island Jewish Health System in Manhasset. “Without a doubt. I’ve never been that miserable.” For almost a year he’s been running the Rosen Center, which helps provide free counseling to military and law enforcement personnel and their families living on LI and in the metropolitan region. Before coming to North Shore-LIJ, Roberts, now 37, was the deputy director of the New York State Division of Veterans Affairs. In the first week of April 2003, Roberts, who’d gone to West Point, was an Army captain leading 90 American soldiers as a field artillery battery commander. Stationed at an isolated outpost about 45 minutes from his supply lines, his troops were exposed to enemy attacks but it was nothing he didn’t expect. Then, almost overnight, his mission changed. He was looking after his soldiers and running a small city in Iraq, Balad Ruz. “I equate it to taking your local fire department and turning them into a bunch of police officers,” Roberts says. “It looks like everybody’s driving vehicles with flashing lights but it’s two totally different jobs.” w w w. lo n g i s l a n d p r e s s . c o m

andy roberts, of the rosen family wellness center at north shore lij, greets sen. kirsten gillibrand.

And for veterans of the Iraq operations, apparently, nationbuilding was far more stressful— and no less dangerous, according to John Javis, chairman of the Veterans Health Alliance of Long Island. “I have yet to have a veteran come up to me and say, ‘I was traumatized by what happened during the invasion.’ Not one… We went in there and we did what we had to do,” Javis says, noting that Saddam Hussein’s forces were crushed within weeks. But then came the insurgency and the long occupation. “The military trains people to basically blow stuff up…not to build nations... And so you’ve got very young people being asked to almost function as a diplomat.” Javis adds that the burden of dealing daily with IEDs, those diabolical booby traps insurgents deployed to such lethal effect, has also had “a tremendous psychological impact” on our soldiers. “People driving down the road today, they see a garbage bag and they think there could be a bomb inside,” Javis says. According to a spokesman for the Northport Veterans Affairs Medical Center, 5,272 veterans of Operation Enduring Freedom, Operation Iraqi Freedom and Operation New Dawn have been seen at the VA facility since 2001. Of those, 313 veterans had a diagnosis of traumatic brain injury (TBI), and 934 were diagnosed with PTSD. Last year, 80 of these veterans had TBI and 631 had PTSD. The VA facility has a wide range of services in addition to medical screening, including vocational training and other programs. “We have some pretty good techniques to help people with PTSD,” says Javis of the Veterans Alliance. “We don’t have that so much with traumatic brain injury because the brain literally is not functioning properly. It’s been damaged. A trained person can pick that up.”

Once diagnosed, TBI patients can be better served, he adds. Javis says mental health providers on LI are beginning to see a troubling trend: “A number of folks from Iraq have basically shut down and have stopped functioning. They’re living at home, they’re not going to work, they’re not going to school. They’re not participating in life.” These vets are in full retreat, he continues, staying indoors, playing video war games and “kind of numbing themselves” with alcohol and other substances.

LAST CALL FROM IRAQ

One Saturday morning in July 2007, Tim Scherer and his wife Janet were sitting in their den at their home in East Northport when the news came. “I was looking out the window and my wife was talking to me,” recalls Scherer, a former stock broker who runs the Vetsbuild “green construction” training program at United Veterans Beacon House in Bay Shore. “The next thing I knew I saw a woman in her greens come up onto the deck… I just froze… I was confused for a minute, but then I saw the second Marine come up. My wife saw my mouth fall; it must have hit the ground, and she turned around and started screaming, ‘Don’t open the door!’” Their 21-year-old son had been killed by a sniper while stacking sand bags in Iraq. He’d been shot through the armpit, where his body armor could not protect him. Corporal Christopher G. Scherer had wanted to enlist right after the Sept. 11, 2001 attacks, but his father persuaded him to wait. He became an Eagle Scout and played varsity lacrosse at Northport High School. A month after he graduated in 2004, he was in boot camp on Parris Island, S.C. In the spring of 2007, he and his fellow Marines of the 1st Combat Engineer Battalion, 1st Marine Division, left Camp Pendleton, Calif., for Kuwait,

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where he earned the rank of corporal on his mother’s birthday, June 1. “He was ecstatic when he got the rank of corporal,” Scherer recalls. “He was fulfilling one of his dreams. You can go through your whole life without finding that job that you love, and he enjoyed what he was doing… We have no regrets. We wish it would’ve ended differently— certainly for our son—but our son volunteered to be a Marine… You raise your children and you have to let them fly.” They had just spoken to their son a few days before his death and he’d asked for pairs of lighter boot socks. “And when we were ready to hang up, he says, ‘Wait! Can you do me a favor? Can you send some extras because some of the other guys don’t have families. They don’t get care packages.’ You don’t know that this is your last phone call with your son,” Scherer says. He e-mailed his son’s request to his friends for help and soon he’d received $2,500 to buy supplies for his son’s platoon. He shipped the packages to Iraq but Chris had died days before they arrived and every package was returned unopened. Then Scherer sent the supplies to his son’s friend who was also serving in Iraq and “that’s how we got started.” Before this Gold Star dad became a case worker for Beacon House’s Vetsbuild program, Scherer, his wife, and his older son and two twin daughters decided to honor Chris by setting up a college scholarship that has since blossomed into the “Semper Fi Fund,” the “Leave No Marine Behind Project” and “Team Chris.” With the help of other volunteers they’ve sent monthly care packages to men and women serving in harm’s way. For four years now on Memorial Day weekend, they’ve also sponsored a “I Did the Grid” fund-raiser in East Northport, which Scherer describes as “the Fenway Park of road racing… it’s 31 turns. You actually run up and down every block Chris grew up on…” Neighbors line the streets for the race, which starts and ends at Pulaski Road School, and there’s something for runners (and walkers) of every caliber, from a four-mile competitive run to a one-mile run for fun. The next one is Saturday, May 26. “Doing what I do here keeps Chris on my mind but not in a negative way,” says Scherer. “If he’d come home, I’d be fighting for him to get a job.” Like Scherer and many others who volunteered to join the fight, Continued on page 14

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Sgt. James Regan saw 9/11 as a call to arms. Unlike many others, he passed up a law school scholarship to enlist, serving two tours in Afghanistan before his second tour in Iraq ended in an IED blast that killed the 26-yearold Manhasset man. His family keeps his name alive with the Lead the Way Fund, a nonprofit dedicated to filling the gap in government assistance to the families of fellow Army Rangers who’ve died, been wounded or are still serving. Assisting a segment of the service that falls under the Special Operations Command, which is heavily used in the broader War on Terror, has become the fallen soldier’s last—and lasting—mission, filling a void among nonprofits dedicated to special ops units. “It needed to be done,” says Regan’s father, James, chairman and CEO of the fund. “You can only imagine being the spouse of a Ranger who’s been deployed 10 times.”

THE WAR WITHIN

Serving the country in the wake of the Great Recession makes adjusting to civilian life that much harder, say those who advocate for and support LI’s veterans. It doesn’t help the cause when employers think that these men and women who served may be suffering from untreated problems. “The majority of the people who have served come back stronger for what they’ve done,” says Roberts of the Rosen Center. “They’re better leaders, they’re team players, they’re mission-focused, and they’re disciplined.” But Roberts would not have gotten where he is today without seeking help—the hardest decision he says he ever had to make. “Three years after I got home,” Roberts recalls, “my dad said, ‘I still don’t think you’re behaving in a way that seems like you were before you left.’ That was shocking to me because in my own mind I thought I was behaving completely normally.” He’d been scanning the hillsides of California for the silhouettes of enemy soldiers, wondering whether vehicles on the highways next to him had bombs or weapons inside, even though he knew they didn’t. And once his girlfriend stepped on some bubble-wrap and “it was as though she’d fired an M-16 right behind me... She said that was the angriest she’d ever seen me.” And so, to get his dad off his back, he decided that he would have to get treatment himself if he were ever to become an advocate for veterans, something that he decided he really wanted to do. Without going for therapy, how could he tell someone else what to do? 14

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“It was as simple as having a conversation with somebody,” Roberts says today about his treatment. “I’ve been so involved with this stuff for years [now] I can’t believe I made such a federal case out of it, but I can relate to everybody who has such a hard time taking that first step.” Scott Castillo, deputy director of the Nassau County Veterans Service Agency, who served in Iraq and Afghanistan, similarly was reluctant to get help and now makes it his life’s work to show the wave of soldiers who are now returning home from the war that seeking assistance is not a sign of weakness. “When I got back, it took me seven months to become a civilian,” he says. “It was very difficult. Others take years. Some of them didn’t get back. You’ve got to start from square one.” Sadly, some Iraq war veterans who don’t seek treatment for PTSD have committed suicide. Families of these soldiers often suffer in silence since such cases typically don’t receive much attention, but that wasn’t the case with former Marine Bartholomew Ryan, an Iraq vet who hanged himself at Nassau jail last month. For nurse Hatty Baldwin, seeing her fiancé die last year of a bad combination of prescribed drugs for his PTSD pushed her to fight against such preventable deaths when veterans are years removed from the battlefield. John Jennings had served two tours with the Army in Iraq before he was discharged in 2005. He and Baldwin began dating in 2008. Four years later, she found him dead at age 34. “As far as I’m concerned, he’s a casualty of the war,” she says from her home in Calverton, not far from Calverton National Cemetery, where Jennings is buried. “The war doesn’t stop, the nightmares don’t stop,” she says. “It just keeps going and going and replaying in his head.” Baldwin says Jennings was in therapy for his PTSD but needed group treatment with other young men he could relate to—something he never got. Sen. Zeldin has since appointed her to a panel to help other vets find peer counseling, an initiative named in honor of Jennings, who’d campaigned for Zeldin. “I don’t think until the day he died he acknowledged how bad he was,” Baldwin says of her fiance. Nine years after “Shock and Awe,” with our troops still at war in Afghanistan, Javis of the Veterans Health Alliance hopes he starts hearing more “success stories” here at home about vets “who admit they had problems and went for help and got better! That’s the story for me.”

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Spring “Going Green” Trends What’s Hot... Besides The Weather By Licia Avelar lavelar@longislandpress.com

It’s never been a secret that a supposed “Doomsday” is scheduled to occur in 2012, but now that the end may be upon us, people have been ignited with a passion to take care of the Earth and their homes. While some think the Apocalypse is just a good excuse to forgo spring-cleaning and house upkeep, others are choosing to improve their abodes to ensure a brighter future for both the environment and their families. This year one of the most enticing aspects about “going green” is also saving some green! While not everyone is ready to shell out thousands of dollars to take on the “net-zero energy home” plunge, there are many affordable ways

to “go green” this spring. Adding windows lets you spruce up the home this spring and save energy. By adding more windows, you will increase the airflow and reduce cooling costs. Opt for low-maintenance, highquality Fibrex windows from Renewal by Andersen, that feature an energysaving design without compromising appearance. Another popular trend this year is the solar tube, an alternative to a skylight. The tube provides natural light for the room it’s installed in while it also gathers solar energy. For a grand entrance to your home, fiberglass is hot right now and has an even less impact on the

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environment than vinyl. It gives off an authentic wood door look without the maintenance needs of real wood and is weather-resistant with outstanding durability and saves our trees! For floors, linoleum is a popular choice for 2012. It’s made of natural materials and is among the “greenest” of floors and is available in everything from traditional marble patterns to solid colors and graphic designs and is not only durable, but very soft. “Linoleum is very big right now,” notes Brian Finegold of All About Floors in Bethpage. “Linoleum really has come a long way. It’s more moisture-proof than before.”

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LIP B3

Continued from page BB1

Bold colors are in style this spring, so be sure to use paint with a lower VOC or chemical-free quality. Painting an accent wall a vibrant color from collections such as Pristine Eco-Spec Paint by Benjamin Moore & Co. and Livos non-toxic paint and thinners by Livos Phytochemistry can really dress up a room for a small investment. Both of these paints can improve the air quality of a home, and aren’t like traditional paint that contains many VOCs [volatile organic compounds], including benzene and toluene. When it’s time to open the pool, there are ways to save on energy consumption with a variable speed pump, which is in high demand, according to experts who report it can reduce energy costs by up to 90 percent. Solar swimming pool heaters can be the most cost-effective use of solar energy. According to FD Solar in Lindenhurst, these innovative heaters not only extend the swimming season and cut down heating costs, they also require minimal maintenance. Eco-friendly furniture is also quite fashionable this season, such as environmentally conscious recycled furniture. Natural fabrics are popular too, including wool, seagrass and bamboo. Interested in wood furniture? Look for an FSC label: the Forest Stewardship Council grants certifications to companies that harvest wood in accordance with its strict standards. Placing houseplants throughout your home not only look beautiful they improve the air quality for free. Whether it’s eco-friendly furniture, pool pumps, solar tubes, windows or some pretty houseplants, there are many ways to go green this spring that will benefit both the environment and your bank account. With reporting by Michael Ventimiglia.

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If this doesn’t belong in your living room, neither do cheap windows. The folks who make cheap, vinyl and fiberglass windows clearly don’t consider temperature changes. Those window frames are only fastened with plastic, staples and glue… which are no match for our seasons. Those materials expand and contract, the glass seals break, the insulating argon gas escapes, and your comfort and money go right out the window.

By Licia Avelar lavelar@longislandpress.com

Everyone has their own habits, but come spring, plenty of folks share in one: spring cleaning. Although daunting, spring cleaning is a customary duty and one that the whole family can participate in. With springs arrival in full force already, it’s time to kick off your own annual cleaning tradition by putting on the garden or rubber gloves and breaking out the cleaning supplies from the closet where they had been hibernating all winter. Here are some tips for sprucing up your home’s interior and your pool and yard.

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Spring Cleaning

Start by getting rid of the things that are filling up your home and recycle, store, sell or donate items you aren’t using. Sort out the stuff you’re saving and reorganize them.

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It’s a simple and effective task. The Maids, a national cleaning company with multiple locations on Long Island, suggests using a spray bottle filled with water and dishwashing liquid, spraying the mixture on a cloth and cleaning the walls in sections. After a few minutes, wipe the walls down with a clean, damp sponge, top to bottom. 3. Fan Maintenance

Change the direction of the fan and clean the blades. “Even if you don’t use the ceiling fan to move warm air from the top of the room to heat your home more evenly during the winter, it is still a good idea to limit the annual buildup of dust and lint from its potential to become airborne and harmful to your lungs,” says Seth Selesnow of Alure Home Improvements.

6. Bathroom Mold Prevention

A consistently moist bathroom is the one place where mold can build up quickly in the warm months. Prevent this by checking the ventilation system and making sure fans are properly working and kept clean. 7. Clean Air Conditioning Filters

Remove air-conditioning unit covers and filters and clean or replace them. “The dirt and grime of the winter now only awaits blowing into the room unless you have effectively prepared the units for the upcoming cooling season,” advises Seth Selesnow of Alure Home Improvements. 8. Prep Pools With Algaecides

Dunrite Pools suggests using algaecides two weeks before opening the pool to swimmers. They’re highly effective products that can help keep pool water crystal clear and algae-free. When it’s time to open the pool, shock it and clean the covers. 9. Prune Trees

After the violent storms and hurricane scare last summer that left trees down 4. Freshen Up Your Fridge on every corner, invest in a tree expert. Pruning practices have a significant Unplug it and remove everything impact on tree strength and health. before cleaning. Take out the shelves and drawers, and wash them in the sink Poorly pruned trees have higher rates of failure during storms so protect with a mixture of water and dish soap. your property. Wash the inside surfaces of the fridge with the same solution before wiping 10. Prepare For Winter everything down with a clean cloth, advises The Maids. Now is the time to go solar. “People should think about oil prices and 5. Clean The Carpet how much they can save on their utility bills for next year,” says Scott Remove the dirt and grime that has Maskin of Sunation, who recommends accumulated in your carpet over the switching to solar power while LIPA winter by renting a carpet cleaner or is offering rebates. “Switch over now opting for a professional. Rolando Guzman of Carpet Depot says cleaning while conditions are good for it.” your carpet will help it in the long run, “[Dirt and dust] abrades the carpet and makes it wear [out] faster, ” he says.

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Inspiration’s Reform

becoming a household name within the online photo sharing community. The phenomenon has drastically risen in popularity over the past few months, and as of January, the site had acquired about 12 million members. Pinterest differs from the traditional inspiration board in the sense that you simply click a button to save an image to a virtual “board” instead of clipping out photos from sources like magazines and newspapers to tack them to a corkboard. This computerized action, called “pinning,” can either be completed by taking images from the website itself or from anywhere

By Mia Trentadue

In today’s world, you can do pretty much anything on the computer, in particular, via the Internet. After its launch in 2010, the website Pinterest has made it possible to create inspiration boards in this way: online. Ben Silbermann, founder, made the goal of the website “to connect everyone in the world through ‘things’ they find interesting.” Although it started out as a website popular to women obsessed with posting bridal pictures (don’t get me wrong, there’s still quite a bit of this), Pinterest is on its way to

across the Internet and saving them to one of your sets. On the site, you can also “like” pins. By liking a pin, you do not post it, but simply save it in a designated area of things that come close to reaching your inspirational standards. Although the general concept is the same as that of a regular pin board, Pinterest makes it quicker and easier to compile your ideas, aspirations, and, well, things you just like. And, best of all, it doesn’t leave a mess of paper clippings everywhere.

With a pin board, ideas and concepts tend to be thrown together in a collage-like manner making them a tad difficult to follow. Unlike a traditional cork inspiration board, Pinterest makes it possible to have multiple inspiration boards in one spot allowing you to organize your inspirations thematically. So basically: you see a pin that catches your eye, and you pin or repin it to the appropriate board. Although the concept is pretty simple, many people find the notion addicting…

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starting lineup: the queue at strat-o-matic’s glen head home offices on opening day 2012.

Diamond Heads

Strat-O-Matic brings baseball fans from across the country to Glen Head for one day—and then consumes them for the rest of the year By Dave Gil de Rubio It’s a brisk but unusually mild early February morning—perfect weather for shagging flies. And even though Major League Baseball’s 2012 season is about a month and a half away, Strat-O-Matic’s 37th Opening Day is in full swing at the company’s home office in Glen Head. The sun is shining down on a queue of around 80 people patiently waiting outside the non-descript two-story gray brick building that sits across from the Glen Head Long Island Rail Road station. Predominantly male and middle-aged, many of these Strat players are local—although there are a number of die-hards who’ve trekked from across the country to wait on this line. And they’re all eager to get their collective hands on the new game sets getting readied for sale to the public at the stroke of noon. What is Strat-O-Matic? Created in 1961 by Great Neck native Hal Richman, Strat (as it’s known to fans), is best described as Dungeons & Dragons for the fantasy sports set. Two regular six-sided dice and one 20-sided red die are used in conjunction with player cards, offering various hitting and fielding outcomes based on actual statistics from the prior season and thoroughly determined player ratings. And that’s just the basic game—there are also Advanced and Super Advanced versions, where mitigating factors like pitcher fatigue, ballpark dimensions, weather and matchups can be factored into a game’s outcome. There’s no need, of course, to line up on Opening Day to pick up the new Strat game sets—they can be purchased at any time online. But every year, people are here, on Long 32

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Island in February, waiting. This year, the devotees are made up of an interesting array of hardball enthusiasts. Philadelphia native Bryan Killen, for instance, has been playing Strat for 20 years, and is attending his 15th Opening Day. “This all stems from my love of baseball,” says Killen, sporting a battered Phillies cap and a wide grin. “Strat brings us together, and who has the time to otherwise get together?” Gene Abood, meanwhile, drove over from Pinebrook, New Jersey, in order to stake his place on line at 7 a.m. An aficionado since getting introduced to the game by his two older brothers in 1972, Abood is still recovering from losing his league’s championship series. “I just got back from playing our World Tournament in Las Vegas where I lost the World Series,” he says. “I wound up having to eat the card of Tyler Clippard, my game-losing pitcher, after I rolled a 4-9 and he blew the game for me.” Strat-O-Matic’s origins date back to when 11-year-old sports fan Richman decided to create his own baseball game after becoming dissatisfied with what was then available. “I had played a game called All Star Baseball and it only measured hitting,” recalls Richman today. “Once you started playing it as often as I did, the spinner used in the game wore down and threw off the averages tremendously. So I took dice in hand and rolled them 5,000 times; I created a probability table and from there started creating the game.” This nascent version of Strat eventually evolved to include player stats. When Richman was ready to

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graduate college, he sought to turn this childhood dalliance into a career. He made overtures for seed money to a variety of sources including board game titans Parker Brothers and the Brooklyn Dodgers. These investors took a pass, so it took a $5,000 loan from his father—with the agreement that if Richman were unable to pay back the money in a year’s time, he’d abandon his dreams and come to work at his father’s company. “The last thing I wanted to do was go into my father’s insurance company,” he recalls. “I borrowed the money with the hopes of being able to pay him back within the year, and fortunately, I was able to.” In the five decades since Strat-OMatic hit the market, the game has not only inspired a generation of baseball fans, but expanded to include football, hockey and basketball. Moreover, the game served as a childhood introduction to the inner workings of baseball for a fraternity of analysts, executives and players, including Bob Costas, Theo Epstein and Keith Hernandez, among many others. In an interview with NPR, The Numbers Game author Alan Schwarz declared that a 2002 poll he took of 50 baseball executives found that “exactly half had learned the game in large part by playing Strat-O-Matic as kids.” And while fantasy baseball is considerably more popular today than Strat, its origins can be traced to Hal Richman’s invention. “[Rotisserie Baseball inventor] Daniel Okrent was a major StratO-Matic player living in New York City,” explains Richman. “When he moved out to a small Massachusetts community to write a book, there were

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no Strat-O-Matic players in town. In order to keep his fingers on baseball, he developed the fantasy baseball game, or rotisserie, which is what it was then called. In a sense, you could say StratO-Matic played a part in creating fantasy baseball.” ESPN’s Bill Daughtry—a longtime Opening Day fixture—sees the correlation, but feels Strat is the superior product. “I’ve never done a survey on this but just in casual conversation, you’ll find that people don’t do both,” says Daughtry. “They’ll either do one or the other, and usually one side will frown on the other a little bit. Strat-O-Matic is a more consuming product. You can get into it for the ability to put together a team. Or you can get into it for the ability to manage a team in terms of being in the dugout. You can be the guy who puts the team together. You can be the guy in the front office. You can be the guy who does the statistical analysis.... In fantasy? It’s not the same.” Back on the line is Kevin Thomas, wearing a Cubs Hat, University of Illinois jacket and New York Rangers jersey with a portable suitcase parked in front of him. Thomas got up at 3:15 that morning at his Wheaton, Ill. home in order to catch a crack-of-dawn flight out of O’Hare International Airport. This is his ninth Opening Day. “I’m here to pick up cards for my league,” says Thomas. “When I first did this, I wanted to have the experience of doing it, and promised myself that I would only do it one time. At this point my league members have come to depend on my flying out here every year. And while the cards are released on Friday, sets don’t go out in the mail until the following Monday, at which point you don’t know when they’re going to arrive. We need a couple of weeks to pore over the stats, absorb everything and start strategizing for our draft.” According to Richman, the Opening Day crowd is usually between 150 to 200 people, on average. Richman admits that this devotion never ceases to amaze him. “One year we had a blizzard—it was snowing and the temperature was around 20 degrees,” recalls Richman. “And we still had 75 people show up. We’ve had people come from as far away as California to personally pick up their sets. I met some fellows today, one of them drove up from Alabama, stopped off to pick a friend up in Tennessee and hit Harrisburg to grab another league member before heading straight here. These friendships started out as work relationships and evolved into something more personal because of their participation in a Strat league.”

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Stony Brook University/SUNY is an affirmative action, equal opportunity educator and employer. 12021066H

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Long Island Press Arts, Entertainment & Nightlife

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NORTH KOREA @ OLLIE’S POINT Perhaps the best-kept secret Long Island has to offer is North Korea, a super-group featuring current and ex-members of Envy on the Coast, Dillinger Escape Plan and the Rivalry. With a rather low profile when compared to their other projects, the band released their second EP in February titled Basement Tapes Vol. 2 via Project Rodney for free. With updates few and far between, it came as a huge surprise after cryptic posts on their Facebook page started popping up in 2010. North Korea has been outspoken since their inception about their opinion on the music industry. This project will not be a full-time act in the sense of touring the country but rather writing songs they believe in and putting said songs out without a rush or pressure from anyone else. This Friday, North Korea joins fellow Long Islanders Sleep Bellum Sonno, NGHBRS, Con the Villain and DJ Nick Ghanbarian. Don’t miss the show—who knows when the next one will be. FRIDAY, 3.23. —Anthony Dobrini

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Week of March 22 - March 28, 2012

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Do This Event Listings

fast as you can

ongoing Healthy Baking, Zumba, GlutenFree Dinner, Yoga, CardioJam and Workshops @ Oh My Girls! For a full lineup of events, visit www. ohmygirls.com.

Beer Pong Tourneys @ Mulcahy’s $20 per team cash prizes, $6 pitchers. Wednesdays. Trivia Nite @ Napper Tandy’s Northport Flaunt your knowledge—or lack thereof—over a few drinks. Tuesdays. LI’s First 12-Hour Happy Hour @ Nutty Irishman Bay Shore The slogan pretty much says it all: “If you’re not here, you’re not happy…” Fridays.

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IRISH DAY & ST. PATRICK’S PARADE @ VILLAGE OF ROCKVILLE CENTRE At 12 noon, the annual parade kicks off on Maple Avenue with our very own Pressley the Panda in tow. And Irish Day takes over the village before and after, with restaurants, bars and all, opening their doors as early as 10 a.m. to keep the St. Patrick’s Day momentum going till the wee hours. SATURDAY, 3.24. —Jaclyn Gallucci

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thursday 3.22 Ringling Bros. & Barnum & Bailey Dragons @ Nassau Coliseum Elephants, tigers, trapeze artists, big shoes—yes, please! Through 3.26.

Singersongwriter

Fiona Apple

plays Music Hall of Williamsburg on FRIDAY, 3.23.

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POKER NIGHT @ SOCIAL SPORTS KITCHEN Put on your poker face...The Executive Business Association invites LI to a night at the casino presented by MercedesBenz of Massapequa. $100 includes open bar, food and entry into the free tournament. Registration at 6 p.m., games begin at 7 p.m. TUESDAY, 3.27. —JG

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Hofbrau Maibock @ The Good Life, Horace & Sylvia’s Publick House Both establishments debut the malty brew just in time for spring. friday 3.23 Hunger Games Party @ Dolphin Bookshop Twilight is so 19 seconds ago. Celebrate

for

the latest dark tween movie with food, music, ticket giveaways and games from 6:30 p.m.-8 p.m. Maureen McGovern @ Tilles Center Back in the early 1970s, Maureen McGovern made her hay with hits penned for disaster movies like The Poseidon Adventure and The Towering Inferno. McGovern’s current show is dubbed the “Long and Winding Road.” This salute to the music of the 1960s finds the Ohio native dipping into the canons of singer-songwriters as Joni Mitchell, Jimmy Webb, Paul Simon, Carole King, James Taylor, John Lennon, Paul McCartney and Laura Nyro.—Dave Gil de Rubio Flashlight Hike @ Connetquot State Park, 7:30-9:30 p.m. Reservations required: 631-5811005. Mark Yard @ Governor’s Comedy Also @ McGuire’s on 3.24. Eleventyseven @ Vibe Lounge Bernie Worrell Orchestra @ Brooklyn Bowl With The Chapin Sisters, Andre Lassalle (of SociaLybrium) Continued on page 36

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Do This Continued from page 35 /////////////////////

& Jimmy Destri (of Blondie). Rhett Miller w/ Salim Nourallah @ City Winery Wet Willie @ B.B. King Blues Club & Grill Marshall Crenshaw @ Grey Horse Tavern Call him the pop equivalent of Forrest Gump. In addition to crafting a wellrespected solo career that’s found a number of other artists covering his compositions, Marshall Crenshaw’s muse has found his finger in many different pies. He was a member of the road-show version of Beatlemania, played Buddy Holly in La Bamba, authored a number of rock & roll-themed books and toured as a member of DKT/MC5, a band of MC5 survivors. —DGdR A Storm of Light/ Mustard Gas and Roses (ex-ISIS)/ Magic Circle (members of Doom Riders, Mind Eraser & Rival Mob) @ St. Vitus

YOU’vE bEEN wAITINg fOR THIS.

t’s that time of year Isles fans. The games are ramping up and the players are ready to go. Join us as we push through the Eastern Conference against some of our fiercest rivals in the most intense action of the season!

Excision @ Best Buy Theater Also 3.24. Jefferson Starship @ The Paramount Also 3.24 @ B.B. King Blues Club & Grill. Tommy Castro & Joe Louis Walker @ YMCA Boulton Center For this double-bill, the Bay Area is represented in full force by this pair of singing blues guitarists—San Jose’s Tommy Castro and Frisco running buddy Joe Louis Walker. While the latter is out in sup-

THURSDAY, MARCH 29 @ 7PM vS. PENGUINS SATURDAY, MARCH 31 @ 1PM vS. BRUINS SUNDAY, APRIL 1 @ 3PM vS. SENATORS THURSDAY, APRIL 5 @ 7PM vS. JETS

port of his brand-new Alligator Records debut Hellfire and its stylistic nods to Johnny “Guitar” Watson, Hendrix and Bob Seger (!), Castro is still digging into his last outing, 2009’s Hard Believer, and its covers of Bob Dylan, Wilson Pickett and Allen Toussaint. — DGdR Phil Keith @ Book Revue Author of BlackHorse Riders. Robert Kelly @ Brokerage Comedy Also 3.24. Made in Brazil: Luciano Pardini @ Glo Great South Bay Tasting @ Bellport Cold Beer & Soda, 4-8 p.m. La Cage Aux Folles @ Dix Hills Performing Arts Center The uproarious musical tells the story of Georges, the owner of a glitzy nightclub in lovely Saint-Tropez, and his partner Albin. Also 3.24. saturday 3.24 Easter Bunny Breakfast @ Applebee’s Lake Grove Meet the Easter Bunny from 8-10 a.m. Advanced tickets required: 631-5852000, ext. 5. Goose Island Beer and Cheese Pairing @ A&R Beverage St. Patrick’s Day Continues @ Napper Tandy’s Miller Place

OUT LIKE A LAMB Put a little Spring in Your Step

Opening Weekend @ Adventureland, 2245 Broadhollow Rd., Farmingdale. LI’s famous amusement park opens with a bang, celebrating its 50th birthday with buy one, get one admissions. Saturday, 3.24 & Sunday, 3.25. Hofbrau Maibock Spring Kickoff Party @ Loyal Dog Ale House, 288 Montauk Hwy., Lindenhurst. 8 p.m.-4 a.m. Party with Germany’s own Julia Strauss and test your balance during the the famous mug holding contest. Thursday, 3.22. Evening Stargazing @ Custer Institute And Obseratory, 1115 Main Bayview Rd.,Southold. 7-midnight. Guided tours of the spring night sky through the observatory’s powerful telescopes. Saturday, 3.24. Spring Craft Fair @ Holy Trinity High School, Newbridge Road/Route 106, Hicksville. 10 a.m.-4:30 p.m. Spring crafts, merchandise, food, raffles and baked goods. Saturday, 3.24. Sun & Fun @ Napper Tandy’s, 229 Laurel Ave., Northport. Celebrate the first Monday of spring with two-for-one Sex on the Beach shots. Monday, 3.26. Seal Hike @ Montauk State Park, Montauk. Register at 631-668-3781. 2-4 p.m. Walk along the water and visit all the different types of seals that inhabit Montauk. Saturday, 3.24. Parading Down Main Street @ Northport Historical Society, 215 Main St., Northport. 1:30 p.m. A guided walking tour of Northport’s historic business district courtesy of a local history buff with a gift for storytelling. Sunday, 3.25. South Shore Clean Up @ All Island Marine, 480 Reina Rd., Oceanside. Volunteers will board boats and head out to remote islands to help clean up the local bay. Saturday, 3.24. Theodore Roosevelt’s Oyster Bay @ LIRR, Maxwell Ave., Oyster Bay. 2 p.m. Take a walk with a park ranger through sites connected to TR. Sunday, 3.25.

Primitive Weapons/ Old Lines/Bad Biology/Sannhet @ St. Vitus

—Jaclyn Gallucci

An Evening with Herbie Hancock & His Band @ Tilles Center

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Never one to cling to the hidebound viewpoint of many jazz traditionalists, Herbie Hancock went from 2005’s pop crossover project Possibilities to his most recent effort, 2010’s The Imagine Project. On it, Hancock continued to cross musical boundaries collaborating with everyone from bluesrock royal couple Susan Tedeschi and hubby Derek Trucks to Brazilian singersongwriter CeU, Malian icon Oumou Sangare, Pink and Los Lobos.—DGdR Ben Kweller @ Irving Plaza Those Mockingbirds @ Vibe Lounge Rachel Platten & Jeff LeBlanc @ City Winery Cam Meekins @ Ollies Point The Giraffes @ Mercury Lounge Rachel Platten @ City Winery Allman Brothers Band @ Beacon Theatre Also 3.25. Fire Island Volunteer Recruitment Day @ PatchogueWatch Hill Ferry Terminal Nickelodeon’s Fresh Beat Band Tour @ NYCB Theatre Ethel @ Madison Theatre Not your typical string quartet. St. Patrick’s Day Parade @ Hampton Bays Kicks off at 11 a.m. from Hampton Bays Middle School on Ponquogue Avenue. Barrel Tasting @

Pindar Vineyards St. Patrick’s Day Parade @ Brentwood Begins 1 p.m. at Washington Avenue and Clarke Street. Bebout, Johnson, Welden: Mixed Media Prints @ Jeanie Tengelsen Gallery Through 4.29. St. Patrick’s Day Parade @ Patchogue Starts 2 p.m. at Route 112 and East Main Street. Musician Meet-Up @ All Music’s Rock and Roll University This open mic networking event for musicians begins at 7 p.m. LIWPM (pronounce lip whip ‘em) is an organization for busy professionals who aren’t looking to quit their day jobs, but want to get together with other like-minded individuals, and play some music. Domo Irrera @ Governor’s Comedy Club Also @ McGuire’s on 3.23. Judy Carmichael @ The American Hotel Also 3.25. Yoga Stretch Class @ Family Wellness Center The Rainbow Fish @ Westhampton Beach Performing Arts Center Part of the Page to Stage family friendly series. The Babylon Chorale: Give Praise! @ Our Lady of Grace Kerry Kearney Band @ YMCA Boulton Center Casino Night @ Bay Street Theatre Try your luck with

professional dealers at each gaming table. sunday 3.25 Blackie and the Rodeo Kings @ University Café Canadian roots rockers Blackie and the Rodeo Kings return to Long Island in support of the recently released Kings and Queens, an album’sworth of duets in which the Kings more than holding its own alongside a number of notable female vocalists including Lucinda Williams, Rosanne Cash, Emmylou Harris, Cassandra Wilson and the incredibly reclusive Mary Margaret O’Hara.—DGdR

@ City Winery The Photo Atlas @ Vibe Lounge With Phone Calls From Home, Homebound, Six Stories Told, Cosa Nostra, A Crowd Like You, Opposite Orange & Jordi Rosen. Kyle Eastwood @ Highline Ballroom

St. Patrick’s Day Parade @ Montauk Begins 10 a.m. at Edgemere Road. Chowder served on the Montauk Green.

L’Arc-En-Ciel @ Madison Square Garden What is L’Arc-EnCiel? Only one of Japan’s hugest bands—an act with a French name, theatrical presentation and a sound that contains elements of U2 and Kiss—if Bono and/or Paul Stanley sang in Japanese. Celebrating its 20th anniversary, LAEC is playing its second show on American soil and is becoming the first Japanese act to headline Madison Square Garden. —DGdR

LI Pet Reptile Expo @ Hilton LI

The Wanted @ The Paramount

Women’s History Month Breakfast @ Unitarian Universalist Congregation at Shelter Rock With Dr. Lois Lee, Founder and President of Children of the Night, a nationwide not-for-profit dedicated to rescuing children from sex trafficking since 1979.

Toots & the Maytals @ Brooklyn Bowl

Star Shine 2012 Talent Show @ Patchogue Theatre

Bach’s 327th Birthday @ Central Presbyterian Church All string players invited to a free sight-reading session of Bach’s music from 1:30-4 p.m. Visit www.northportorchestra.org/bach. asp for details.

Gotye @ Terminal 5 With Kimbra. St. Patrick’s Day Parade @ Patchogue Main Street. Anything But Silent: Peter Pan @ Cinema Arts Centre The magical 1924 adaptation screens with live accompaniment by MoMA’s Ben Model. Family Math & Science Day @ Schechter School

King Giant/Backwoods Payback/ Order of the Owl @ St. Vitus

Hampton Theatre Company Auditions @ Quogue Community Hall Visit www.hamptontheatre.org for details.

Marcy Playground

Continued on page 38

Venue addresses and information can be found on Page 38

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Do This

New Exhibition March 31st at Coe Hall Mansion PLANTING FIELDS ARBORETUM STATE HISTORIC PARK

Continued from page 37 /////////////////////

Coe Hall open every day 11:30am – 3:30pm, through September 30th

COCKTAIL CULTURE The Glamorous Gold Coast Years From Prohibition to 1960

PREVIEW PARTY - Cocktail Culture: The Glamorous Gold Coast Years From Prohibition to 1960 Friday, March 30th / 6:00pm – 8:00pm Coe Hall Mansion Enjoy cocktails, live Cole Porter music and hors d’oeuvres in the Great Hall. Reservations required. Tickets $30 per person. Contact: Lilly McGurk (516) 922-8676 or emcgurk@plantingfields.org TOUR - Cocktail Culture Exhibition at Coe Hall With Curators Henry B. Joyce & Jimmy Raye Sat., March 31st / 2:00pm – 2:45pm Free with $3.50 admission to Coe Hall KIDS DANCE PARTY at Coe Hall Thur., April 12th / 2:00pm – 4:00pm Sunday, April 15th/2:00pm – 4:00pm

Free with $3.50 admission to Coe Hall Let the kids dance the afternoon away to the greatest party hits like The Electric Slide, YMCA, Macarena, and many more. Snacks and juice included. Free admission for members. Information: Michelle Benes (516) 922-8682 or mbenes@plantingfieds.org LECTURE - Cocktails 101 Saturday, April 14th / 7:00pm – 9:00pm Coe Hall Mansion Join Gregg Lewis owner of 1-800-BARTEND as he Shakes and Strains us through the hottest libations of our times. Reservations required. Tickets $20 per person for nonmembers and $10 per person for members. Contact: Michelle Benes (516) 922-8682 or email mbenes@plantingfieds.org

The park is open every day 9:00 a.m. – 5:00 p.m.

Best Public Garden

PLANTING FIELDS ARBORETUM STATE HISTORIC PARK

1395 Planting Fields Rd, Oyster Bay, New York 11771 For more information: 516-922-8678 or 516-922-8676 www.plantingfields.org

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The Venetia Fair @ Vibe Lounge

Bowery Ballroom Pink Ribbons, Inc @ Cinema Arts Centre

Thar She Blows! @ Cold Spring Harbor Whaling Museum

monday 3.26 Kimbra @ Mercury Lounge

Jim Hershberg @ Book Revue Author of Marigold.

Goose Island Beer Dinner @ Mirabelle Reservations required: 631-751-0555.

LI Writers Guild Reads @ Book Revue

Babylon Chorale Auditions @ Westbrook Elementary School Visit www.babylonchorale.org for details.

Tasty Tuesday w/ Brooklyn Brewery @ Tap & Barrel, 8 p.m.

All You Can Eat Wing Nite @ Napper Tandy’s Northport

Penny Auction @ VFW Hall Bellmore, 7 p.m.

Wellness & Entrepreneurs Exchange @ Family Wellness Center

Psychic Fair @ Huntington Hilton

Starting with the 1920s, the show is a veritable feast for the eyes and includes fabulous clothes by some of the greatest designers of their time such.

Robert Gordon @ B.B. King Blues Club

Under Their Thumb @ Great Neck Arts Center Author Bill German talks about how a nice Jewish boy from Brooklyn got mixed up with the Rolling Stones and lived to tell about it.

Game Nite @ Katie’s tuesday 3.27 Beer Dinner @ Rookies Sports Club Reservations required: 631-923-0424. Band of Skulls @ Music Hall of Williamsburg.

The Hundred Dresses @ Westhampton Beach Performing Arts Center wednesday 3.28 Hank & Cupcakes @ Santos House Party The Temper Trap @

Fight for the Cure Event @ Lord & Taylor Garden City Wacoal will donate $2 for every particpant plus $2 for every Wacoal bra, shapewear or b.tempt’d bra purchased. 11 a.m.-5 p.m.

Where it’s At Do This Venue Information www.boultoncenter.org Katie’s of Smithtown—145 W. Main St., Smithtown. 631-360A&R Beverage—3600 Manhattan 8556. www.katiesofsmithMerrick Rd., Seaford B.B. Kings Blues Club Unitarian Universalist town.com & Grill—237 West 42nd Congregation at Shelter Brokerage Comedy McGuire’s Comedy St. 212-997-4144. www. Rock—48 Shelter Rock Club—2797 Merrick Rd, Club—1627 Smithtown bbkingblues.com Bellmore. www.brokerage- Rd., Manhasset Ave., Bohemia. 631-467comedy.com VFW Hall—2400 Bedford 5413. www.mcguirescom- Beacon Theatre—2124 Broadway. 212-465edyshows.com Cold Spring Harbor Whal- Ave., Bellmore 6500. www.beacontheing Museum— 279 Main Vibe Lounge—60 N. Park Mirabelle—150 Main St., atre.com St., Cold Spring Harbor Ave., Rockville Centre. Stony Brook Best Buy Theater—1515 Dolphin Bookshop—299 516-208-6590. www. Napper Tandy’s NorthBroadway. 212-930-1950. vibeloungeli.com Main St, Port Washington port—229 Laurel Ave., www.bestbuytheater.com Northport. 631-757-4141. Family Wellness Center— Suffolk County Bowery Ballroom—6 www.nappertandys.com 641-B Old Country Rd., Delancey St. 212-533All Music’s Rock and Roll Plainview Napper Tandy’s Miller 2111. www.boweryballUniversity—531 Route Place—275 Route 25A, room.com Glo—737 Merrick Ave., 111, Hauppauge Miller Place. 631-331Westbury. 516-794-8022. City Winery—155 Varick The American Hotel—49 5454. www.nappertandwww.glonightclubli.com St. 212-608-0555. www. Main St., Sag Harbor ys.com citywinery.com The Good Life—1039 Park Applebee’s Lake Our Lady of Grace—666 Blvd., Massapequa Park Ballroom—431 Grove—3145 Middle Albin Ave., West Babylon Highline W. 16th St. 212-414-5994. Country Rd., Lake Grove Governor’s Comedy The Paramount—370 New www.highlineballroom Club—90 Division Ave., Levittown. www.govs.com Bay Street Theatre—The York Ave., Huntington. Long Wharf, Sag Harbor. www.paramountny.com Irving Plaza—17 Irving 631-725-9500. www. Great Neck Arts CenPatchogue Theatre— 71 Pl. 212-777-6800. www. ter—113 Middle Neck Rd., baystreet.org East Main St., Patchogue. irvingplaza.com Great Neck Bellport Cold Beer and 631-207-1300. www. Joe’s Pub—425 Lafayette Soda—417 Station Rd., patchoguetheatre.com Lord & Taylor Garden St. 212-539-8778. www. City—1200 Franklin Ave., Bellport. Patchogue-Watch Hill joespub.com Garden City Ferry Terminal—80 BrightBook Revue—313 New Madison Square Garwood St., Patchogue Madison Theatre—Molloy York Ave., Huntington. den— 2 Penn Plaza. College, Rockville Centre 631-271-1442. www. Pindar Vineyards— 37645 212-465-6741. www. bookrevue.com Route 25, Peconic. www. thegarden.com Mulcahy’s—3232 pindar.net Central Presbyterian Railroad Ave., Wantagh. Mercury Lounge—217 E. Church—240 Main St., 516-783-7500. www. Quogue Community Houston St. 212-260Huntington muls.com Hall—126 Jessup Ave., 4700. www.mercuryloungQuogue enyc.com Nassau Coliseum—1255 Cinema Arts Centre—423 Park Ave., Huntington Hempstead Tpke., UnionRookies Sports Club—70 Santos Party House— 96 631-423-FILM. www. dale. www.nassaucoliGerard Street, Huntington Lafayette St. www.santocinemaartscentre.org seum.com spartyhouse.com Tap & Barrel—550 Connetquot State Park— NYCB Theatre at WestSmithtown Bypass, Smith- Terminal 5—610 W. 56th Bohemia. 631-581-1005. bury—960 Brush Hollow town. 631-780-5474. St. 212-582-6600. www. Rd., Westbury. 877-598terminal5nyc.com Dix Hills Performing Arts www.52taps.com 8694. www.thetheatreatCenter—305 N. Service University Café—Stony Webster Hall—125 E 11th westbury.com Rd., Dix Hills. 631-656Brook University, Nichols St. 212-353-1600. www. Oh My Girls—140 Jericho 2148. www.dhpac.org Road, Stony Brook. www. websterhall.com Tpke., Syosset. 516-802- Grey Horse Tavern— 291 stonybrook.edu 5800. www.ohmygirls.com Bayport Ave., Bayport Brooklyn Westbrook Elementary Ollies Point—140 Merrick Hilton LI—598 Broad Hol- School—350 Higbie Lane, Brooklyn Bowl—61 Wythe Rd., Amityville. 516-208- low Rd., Melville West Islip Ave. 718-963-3369. www. 6590. www.clubloaded. brooklynbowl.com Westhampton Beach com Horace and Sylvia’s Music Hall of WilliamsPublick House—100 Deer Performing Arts Tilles Center— 720 North- Park Ave., Babylon Center—76 Main St., burg—66 N. Sixth St. ern Boulevard, Greenvale. Westhampton Beach. 212-486-5400. www. 516-299-2752. www. Huntington Hilton—Route 631-288-1500. www. musichallofwilliamsburg. tillescenter.org 110, Melville whbpac.org com

Nassau County

Social Sports Kitchen—1002 Hempstead Tpke., Uniondale

Schechter School of Long Island—1 Barbara Ln., Jericho

Jeanie Tengelsen Gallery—107 E. Deer Park Rd., Dix Hills

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YMCA Boulton Center—37 W. Main St., Bay Shore. 631-969-1101.

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looks count. See what $25 million in improvements look like at our March 28 open house.

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Adoption Pregnant? Consider a loving, courageous adoption plan. FINANCIAL ASSISTANCE, free confidential help, local agency, choose from preapproved families. Photos/updates available. Call Joy: 914-939-1180. www.ForeverFamiliesThroughAdoption.org.

Attorneys are investigating whether these banks violated NY law, and you may be entitled to compensation. Call Attorney Andrew M. Kennedy with the Kennedy Law Office today to learn more.

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Crossword SELF-POSSESSED ACROSS 1 Myron Floren’s boss 5 Malcolm- - Warner 10 Priam’s kingdom 14 Daddy duck 19 Adams or Sedgwick 20 Napoleon’s fate 21 Something to skip? 22 De Valera of Ireland 23 Start of a remark by Dan Post 26 Rectify 27 Sprinted 28 Part of a suit 29 Pastoral poem 30 Sherbet flavor 31 Norm 32 Rib 34 One of “Them!” 35 Dirty 37 Part 2 of remark 45 Colleague of Dolly and Loretta 46 Mature 47 Peachy-keen 48 Plumb crazy 49 “Maria -” (‘41 song) 51 College growth 52 Before, to Byron 53 Mendicant monk 54 Utter 56 See 90 Across 59 Dispute 61 Pigment 62 Hibachi residue 63 Oaf 65 “Love - the Ru-

ins” (‘75 film) 66 Part 3 of remark 69 “I Got a Name” singer 73 Add info 74 Mil. group 76 Genesis vessel 79 “Little -” (‘64 hit) 81 “Be my guest!” 82 God with a trident 84 Storms 85 - Dinh Diem 87 Paw part 88 Jergens or Astaire 89 Field of knowledge 90 With 56 Across, common appetizer 92 Chimney part 93 Duel tool 94 Part 4 of remark 97 Domino or Waller 98 Herriot title start 99 “Excuse me” 100 Western st. 101 Mugabe of Zimbabwe 105 Whetstone 107 Out of control 109 She’s a sheep date 112 Venerate 113 End of remark 117 “The Kiss” sculptor 118 One of the Waughs 119 “ East of Eden” director 120 Imminent 121 Upright 122 Michael of

“Cabaret” 123 Unkempt 124 “Vissi d’-” (“Tosca” aria) DOWN 1 Sport 2 O’Brien or Skinner 3 Mortgage, e.g. 4 Beer barrel 5 Baseball’s Derek 6 Shaft 7 Freshen a fuchsia 8 Cover girl Carol 9 Kapaa keepsake 10 Auto transaction 11 Actress Schneider 12 Fall birthstone 13 Craving 14 Lack 15 “- Lama Ding Dong” (‘61 tune) 16 Prayer finale 17 Hong 18 “The NeverEnding Story” author 24 - Office 25 Regret audibly 30 In the know 31 Nero’s instrument 32 Duplicate 33 Savored the seitan 34 Fall flower 35 David of “Dark Shadows” 36 Too tubby 37 Twist and turn 38 Bee flat? 39 Born

40 You’ll get a kick out of it 41 Texas landmark 42 Symbol

43 Buttercream, e.g. 44 Laramie or Sumter

45 Devour Dostoevsky 50 - carte 53 “Fee, Fi, Fo, - .

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. .” 55 Leading man? 56 Container 57 Arm bones 58 Annie of “Designing Women” 60 Jets and Sharks 63 Opening 64 UK honor 67 Delayed 68 Worn down 69 Cugat consort 70 Mississippi or Missouri 71 New York city 72 Bk. offerings 75 It’s in the bag 76 Skilled 77 Romeo and Juliet 78 Banjo locale 79 Grouch 80 Register 82 Hogan or Hindemith 83 Perfect 86 Word with baby or snake

87 Horner’s fruit 90 Sensed 91 New Jersey town 92 Adversary 95 One who no’s best? 96 “What a relief!” 97 Charlatan 100 Uncool 101 Hard to find 102 Miasma 103 Portend 104 Rohmer or Carmen 105 Sign of sanctity 106 “Glad All -” (‘64 hit) 107 Carpenter’s tool 108 Knight’s quaff 109 Kind of pitcher 110 “Huh?” 111 Bronte heroine 113 Horse hash 114 Endorses 115 Duncan’s denial 116 “Jurassic Park” stuff

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A Free Cell Phone And Free Monthly Minutes For New York Residents Eligible residents may now apply for Assurance Wireless, a Lifeline Assistance program brought to you by Virgin Mobile and supported by the federal Universal Service Fund. Whether you need a phone for emergencies, or to stay connected, Assurance Wireless provides eligible residents with a free cell phone and 250 free voice minutes each month.

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Long Island Press

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