Dealing with the Loss of Your Best Friend

WRITTEN BY CHELSEA SALERNO Copy Editor

The beginning of 2023 was a difficult time for the Lowcountry Dog family. We had spent the last few months watching the decline in our dear friend Peanut’s health, and it was time to say goodbye. Peanut served as our Chief Canine Officer and the void she left at the magazine as well as in our hearts was a big one. Peanut was an amazing foster mom to puppies and kittens alike, nap buddy of both humans and fellow canines and a friend who touched so many lives in her seventeen years. One of the hardest parts of pet ownership is knowing that you will one day have to say goodbye, but rest assured that you are not alone in your grief. Though we miss Peanut every day, her legacy lives on through LCD and every dog saved through one of the many rescues featured in our magazine.

There is no timeline for grief; everyone handles loss differently and that is expected - we are all individuals. There are many resources available to help you along in this journey. Pet Rest Cemetery and Cremation Service of Charleston and McAlister-Smith Funeral and Cremation are both available in this difficult time, from cremation and burial services to creating a celebration of life keepsakes and memorials, to offering grief support for those struggling to move forward. They pride themselves on the respect and dignity they show clients and their furry friends. Perhaps most importantly, Pet Rest and McAlister-Smith both host pet loss support groups so you will always know you are not alone. You are encouraged to move on at your own pace, and the support groups will help you do just that. Meeting with those who have or are dealing with the same heartache, and are there to lend an ear and helpful advice, can be a huge help to those really struggling with the loss of unconditional love and the companionship a furry friend offers.

There are plenty of ways to memorialize your best friend once they have crossed the Rainbow Bridge. Pet Rest posts obituaries regularly, including one for our dear Peanut, with the option to send flowers to the grieving families, for example. They offer beautiful urns, or caskets and access to their pet cemetery if you would prefer to lay your pet to rest there, as well as pet memorial stones that can be placed in your yard. They have keepsakes such as small urn necklaces and hand painted personalized ornaments with your pet’s face and name. My personal favorite is the clay paw print, featuring the name of your beloved pet and an imprint of their paw. These can be turned into ornaments or displayed somewhere in your home as a memorial. Finally, Pet Rest will take your photographs and video footage and combine them with music to create a legacy memorial video for you and your family to appreciate for years to come.

Taking care of your mental health during this time is imperative. It is a major life change so feeling depressed or anxious after losing your best friend is inevitable, but it is of the utmost importance that you do not let the darkness take hold. Try not to think of how you’re feeling in this difficult moment as bad, wrong, or unreasonable. It is natural to process your grief in your own way. Grief has no expiration date and there’s no such thing as “taking too long” to get over loss. Those who have never known the intense love a pet brings as a family member may have trouble understanding this, but that doesn’t invalidate your feelings of sorrow. Allow yourself to feel and grieve, but be sure to tend to your own well-being. Go on fresh-air walks and spend time outdoors, or immerse yourself in exercise or a hobby to distract your mind a bit. Self-care is crucial during this time, and that looks different for everyone. A support group can be extremely beneficial to those feeling alone, whereas planting a memorial garden might be more helpful for someone who would rather grieve by themselves. There is no rule book for grief and the less pressure you put on yourself, the better.

The most important step you can take in grieving the loss of a pet is to be honest about your feelings. Denying your pain, anger or feelings of guilt will only cause continued pain and only by examining and coming to terms with these emotions can you begin to work through them. There is no right or wrong path when grieving. If you are interested in visiting Pet Rest’s Pet Loss Support Group, please contact Brian Calhoun at brian.calhoun@PetRestCarolina.com or you can simply walk-in to one of their meetings every 2nd Monday of the month at 7pm at 132 Red Bank Road in Goose Creek. McAlister-Smith’s website also has many online resources for virtual support groups which can be viewed at https:// www.mcalister-smith.com/grief-support/griefresources.

Finally, please remember you are not alone. Every pet parent will likely go through this stage eventually, so never hesitate to reach out to a support group or even pursue individual counseling if that is what you need. ■