G o d ’s G i f t
Tom McGrath
TOGETHER Eucharist
Preparing at Home for First Eucharist
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For as long as we’ve been married, my wife and I have hosted Thanksgiving dinner. We invite both sides of the family
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to attend. Sometimes quite a crowd gathers around our expanded dining room table as we bow our heads in thanksgiving then carve the turkey. One year when the number of attendees was at an all-time high, Kathleen and I awoke on Thanksgiving morning feeling nervous. Even before early Mass at our parish, we were pulling chairs up from the basement, cleaning every nook and cranny, and running to the store for last-minute ingredients. Later, as the time of our guests’ arrival slowly drew closer, you could feel the tension mount in our house. It was clear that there were far more “nice touches” we could do than we had time to accomplish, and Kathleen and I were getting on each other’s nerves. So we went for a walk. We put down the dust rag and the spatula and took a stroll around our
neighborhood. As we walked in the refreshing air, we recalled the times we had enjoyed around our dining room table with the relatives we so loved. We began to talk about Thanksgivings we’d celebrated when we were growing up, remembering the people who had welcomed us to their table and into their lives. We even recalled a few words from the homily we heard at Mass that morning that spoke of gratitude as the way to open our hearts to the goodness of life. When we arrived home, everything had changed. We had spent a lot of time and worry preparing our house. Finally, we had taken time to prepare our hearts. And that made all the difference. — Tom McGrath, author of Raising Faith-Filled Kids, Loyola Press
Pray for Your Family God, help us to be open to the grace to recognize the gifts and talents you have given us and to use them for the good of the world.
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YOUR CHILD’S SPIRITUAL DEVELOPMENT: Recognizing Our Gifts
When very young children begin to realize that they are individuals apart from their mothers and fathers, they look for clues as to who they are. The feedback they get from those around them shapes their understanding of who they are, what they are like, and what they have to give to the world. We all discover our talents through the feedback we receive from family, classmates, and friends. If we hear “You’re smart” or “You’re stupid,” it hardly matters what our real IQ is. Until we discover otherwise, we will play to the perceptions we take in from trusted people around us. That’s why it’s important for parents to help their children discover and recognize their true talents and gifts, whether those might be the ability to solve math problems, a knack for fixing mechanical things, or the gift of helping others feel welcome. All good gifts come from God and are intended for the good of all and the healing of the world. Here are some steps you can take:
1
When you see your child demonstrating a particular gift or talent, take time to talk oneon-one, eye to eye, and tell your child what you see; for example, “God has given you a real knack for numbers. You will have lots of opportunities to use that talent in your life to do good work and help others.”
2
Encourage your child to explore a wide array of interests and experiences, including experiences that nurture her or his spiritual life.
3
Welcome your child’s interests, even though you might not understand or even appreciate them. Receive and celebrate the gift of who your child is rather than forcing your plans or expectations of who your child should be.
Catholic Fact The Church’s philosophy behind the offertory collection is summed up nicely by Saint Justin, who wrote in his first “Apology” in the second century: “Those who are well off, and who are also willing, give as each chooses. What is gathered is given to him who presides to assist orphans and widows, those whom illness or any other cause has deprived of resources, prisoners, immigrants and, in a word, all who are in need.”
One Family’s Story One evening my family was having a terrible time at dinner. Then I remembered something from a book that I had recently read. The author wrote that his mother used to make him and his three siblings say three nice things about one another every night before going to bed. I quickly adapted this idea to our family by asking everyone around the table to take a turn describing something nice that each person in the family had done for them that day. Needless to say, it changed the whole mood of the meal. Since then, my six-year-old daughter
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will occasionally ask that we repeat that exercise at the dinner table. It reminds us how important each one of us is to the success of our family and how much we rely on each other for help in matters large and small. Sometimes it turns out that our six-year-old has done the nicest things for the rest of us.
—Anonymous Read more family stories at www.loyolapress.com/godsgift.
Learn
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Together Follow Steps 1 to 4 to work through Chapter 5 of God’s
Gift: Eucharist. This chapter helps us learn how we prepare for the Eucharist.
Step 1 3-Minute Family Retreat Gather in a comfortable place. Ask all present to stand and take three slow, deep breaths. When all are ready, invite them to have a seat and close their eyes. Slowly read aloud the following meditation: It’s probably easy to remember the best gift you ever received. In fact, you could make a top-10 list pretty quickly, right? But what about the best gift you ever gave someone else? Can you remember a gift that made someone really happy? What was it about that gift that made the person so happy? Was it because you made the gift? Was it because you thought about that person and found just the right gift for him or her? Discuss this for a moment. Now think of a time when you did something for another person that made him or her happy. Maybe you cleaned your room without being asked. Maybe you helped a friend. Did you realize that those were gifts too? God welcomes our gifts, no matter what shape or style. They’re never the wrong color or the wrong size for him! Let’s open our eyes and talk about our gifts.
Step 2 Let’s Imagine . . . . . . we’ve been invited to star in a talent show. But this talent show is not your usual song and dance. This show hands out prizes for the most different talent, a talent no one has brought to this show before. If you could make up any unusual talent for this show, what talent would you like to have? Why? How would you show everyone this talent? Discuss this for a moment. You know, you already have some pretty amazing talents that you might not recognize as talents right off the bat. Let’s think of what to put on your talent-show application. Suggest examples: beautiful handwriting, a sunny smile, a laugh that makes other people laugh too, a gift for spelling or math, the goofiest silly face, a great passing game in soccer, a sense of generosity. There’s a story in the Bible about a boy who had a talent for generosity and a gift to share that didn’t seem like much at first, that is, until Jesus welcomed his gift. Let’s read about it. Turn to pages 42–43 in your child’s book and read aloud the Scripture story “An Amazing Meal.” This passage from John 6:1–13,47–51 tells the story of the fish and the barley loaves. Next, discuss the following questions and, if your child has not done so already, complete the sticker activity: What did the boy offer to the disciples? (He offered to share his lunch of five loaves and two fish.) What did the disciples think at first? (They wondered how so little could feed so many.) What did Jesus do with the boy’s lunch? (He gave thanks to God for it.) What happened next? (The disciples were able to feed everyone, and there was food left over.)
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Step 4 Let’s Pray Engage in your family prayer ritual. Each of us has great gifts and talents to share with the world. When we offer them to God, he welcomes them and makes them bigger and better than we ever could on our own. Let’s give those gifts to God.
Step 3 Let’s Dig In Our talents and gifts come from God, so he’s really glad when we use them and share them. We have a chance to give some gifts to God at Mass. See if you’ve ever noticed these gift-giving opportunities at Mass. Turn to pages 44–45 in your child’s book and read aloud together “Presentation and Preparation of the Gifts” and “The Blessing of Our Gifts.” These sections describe the procession with bread and wine, the collection, and the priest’s blessing over them. After you read these pages, continue the lesson: Remember when we talked about those surprise gifts you gave when you shared your time or your help? God absolutely loves those gifts too. We offer those to him at the same time at Mass. Turn to page 46 in your child’s book and read aloud together “An Even Greater Gift” and “I Think About This.” Then continue the lesson: So, not only are we giving our gifts at Mass, but we are getting the very best gift ever: the Body and Blood of Christ. With this gift, he’s sharing his time and his help. It’s a great big gift of love that he offers to us every time we receive the Eucharist.
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Turn to pages 48–49 in your child’s book. Choose one person to be the prayer leader and one person to be the reader. Or you may use your own words to thank God for your personal gifts and for his gift of his Son. Close by praying the Lord’s Prayer.
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IDEAS FOR LIVING THE LESSON
COMPLETE AS MANY OF THE FOLLOWING ACTIVITIES AS YOU AND YOUR CHILD DESIRE.
Look and Listen YO U WI LL N E E D > > a shoe box with lid > > wrapping paper > > scissors > > tape > > bows, ribbon, or other package decoration > > slips of paper > > pencil or pen
This Little Light of Mine
Surprise Gifts
Expand your child’s idea of what a gift is by identifying the good your family does each day. With your child, wrap a shoe box and lid, each part separately. Cut a slit in the lid large enough to accommodate your slips of paper. Decorate the box as desired. Each day at dinner or bedtime, talk over the ways your family gave time, support, encouragement, or other gifts to others that day. Write those gifts on slips of paper and drop them into the box. Soon your child will recognize and even look for opportunities to share his or her talents and gifts.
Sing this well-known song with your child.
This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine Let it shine, Let it shine, Let it shine.
Hide it under a bushel? No! I’m gonna let it shine Hide it under a bushel? No! I’m gonna let it shine Hide it under a bushel? No! I’m gonna let it shine Let it shine, Let it shine, Let it shine
Sometimes we have talents and gifts we’ve never even discovered. It can be exciting to learn a new skill and perhaps even share it with the world. Trying new things also offers you the chance to learn about yourself and your child. Together, write two things each of you would like to try or learn to do in the next six months. Add to that list two things your family could try or learn to do as a group. Ideas might include a new language, a new recipe, a sport, a concert—start wherever your interests lie. Most important, take the steps necessary to actually attempt something new, and keep in mind that failure is an acceptable outcome—the point is to be open to discovering, learning, and growing.
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EDITOR’S n ote
A FRIEND RECENTLY OFFERED THIS comparison: “Me trying to understand the Eucharist is like a chipmunk trying to understand Shakespeare. It’s never going to happen.” On one level, I suppose my friend is right. I know I can never completely grasp the doctrine of transubstantiation—our belief that the bread and the wine become the Body and Blood of Christ. But there are many ways of knowing, and the heart may know what the head cannot. The preparation for First Eucharist that you and your child are entering into is not merely about grasping facts. In the Eucharist, we enter into the mystery that Jesus loves us so much that he offers his actual presence to us in this blessed sacrament. One way to help your child prepare to embrace the truth and the practice of the real presence of Christ in the Eucharist is to offer your real presence to your child throughout your time of preparation together. Share your time and attention. Share what you know and what you believe. Talk about the times the Eucharist has fed you. Talk about the example of others whose devotion to the Eucharist awakened your own. I encourage you to take this opportunity to help pass on your faith by going through the lessons in this family guide together and sharing them heart-to-heart. I know you’ll discover many blessings during this time together.
Tom McGrath Editor
Tom McGrath is married to Kathleen, a former middle-school math teacher. They have two grown daughters, who still remember preparing for their First Eucharist with their parents.