Kansas Women's Lifestyle Magazine – Spring 2023

Beyond

Dreaming, dancing and daring with Kansas City’s own Elaina Paige Thomas

SPRING 2023 $8.00

Alex Defendorf

Jeff Biggs John Kabus

Alyson Oliver Travis Oliver Thomas Stringer

Bob Abel Leann Roberson

Nikki Beach Diane Bretthauer

Caden McAfee

Courtney Saathoff

MANAGING EDITOR & CREATIVE DIRECTOR

Anj Riffel

SOCIAL MEDIA & ADVERTISING DESIGN

Kacie Stepp, Kasten Green

EDITORIAL CONSULTANT

Michelle C. Booth

PHOTOGRAPHY

Jason Dailey, Matt Poole

EMAIL COMMENTS TO editor@KSWomensLifestyle.com

ADVERTISING INQUIRIES

Meredithe McCormick VP of Business Development

Meredithe@KSWomensLifestyle.com

DISTRIBUTION (KS)

Baldwin City ⋅ Eudora ⋅ De Soto

Lawrence ⋅ Lenexa ⋅ Shawnee

SUBSCRIPTIONS

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PUBLISHER

KMG Marketing

PRESIDENT & CEO

Mark Kern

Writers SPRING 2023 To learn more about our writers, visit KSWLMagazine.com/writers

MELIA STOCKHAM Productivity Coach / Author

JAYNI CAREY Cookbook Author

JULIE DUNLAP Storyteller

AMY C. KELLY Community Volunteer / Attorney

KERRY HAGNER Massage Therapist / Yoga Teacher

KIM GRONNIGER Writer / Marketer / Explorer

KELLI SZROT Nutrition Coach / Singer / Actor

KATIE HOKE Architect

HEATHER PERRY Fashion Blogger

LONITA COOK Film Critic

Meal-In-One SPRING DINNERS

by

Jayni C arey // photography by Jason Dailey

Once spring arrives,

the local farmers’ market comes alive with fresh vegetables and even the vegetable section in the grocery store perks up. I love combining several seasonal vegetables with a protein to make simple, colorful meals-in-one.

In celebration of spring, I offer two favorites. The first recipe features small gold potatoes, mushrooms, asparagus and Black Forest ham. Toss it all together with brown butter and sprinkle with fresh dill to add the finishing spring touch. The second recipe for an Asian-inspired chicken and vegetable salad meal, calls for shredded chicken breasts, tender-crisp carrots and sugar snap peas. Add sliced celery and green onions then splash with a soy-ginger vinaigrette. Up the crunch by placing the chicken salad on a bed of romaine lettuce leaves and garnish with salty roasted peanuts.

CONTINUED P. 10 »

TASTY AS THESE MEALS ARE, both recipes are ripe for substitutions. For the potato recipe, the gold potatoes can be replaced with new red potatoes, while the asparagus can step aside for snow or sugar snap peas. Mild red onion works in place of the green onions, and if you are a lucky mushroom hunter, you can use morels instead of the baby bellas. Top with a poached egg for additional protein, or eliminate the ham and go meatless for a vegetarian meal.

The chicken salad recipe is equally good with snow peas or asparagus spears instead of sugar snaps, and thin strips of red bell pepper make a colorful addition. For a heartier meal, skip the lettuce and serve the chicken salad on a bed of warm jasmine rice.

Gold Potatoes, Mushrooms, Asparagus & Black Forest Ham with Brown-Butter Glaze

INGREDIENTS

1½ pounds petite gold potatoes

2 teaspoons kosher salt

8 ounces mini or baby bella mushrooms

2 tablespoons olive oil

12 ounces asparagus spears, cut into 1-inch pieces

3 green onions, thinly sliced on diagonal

3 ounces Black Forest ham (room temperature), cut or torn into bite-size pieces

1/3 cup unsalted butter

Salt and freshly ground black pepper, to taste 2 tablespoons fresh dill, chopped (or 1 teaspoon dried dill)

INSTRUCTIONS

Rinse potatoes and halve or quarter them, depending on size. Boil in a large pot of water with 2 teaspoons kosher salt until tender. Drain well; place in a large bowl. Clean mushrooms and halve or quarter them. Sauté in olive oil over medium heat in a non-stick skillet for about 5 minutes. Transfer mushrooms to the bowl of potatoes. Cook cut asparagus spears in boiling water until tendercrisp, about 2 minutes. Drain and add to bowl. Add the sliced green onions and Black Forest ham.

To make brown-butter glaze, melt the unsalted butter in a small skillet over medium heat until it begins to foam. Stir constantly until butter becomes golden-brown and gives off a nutty aroma, 2 to 4 minutes. Take care not to burn the butter. Immediately pour over the potato mixture. Toss gently and season with salt and pepper. Sprinkle with chopped dill and toss again. Serve warm or room temperature. Makes 4 to 6 servings.

SUGGESTION: Top each serving with a poached or fried egg. CONTINUED

Chicken Salad with Asian Flavors

INGREDIENTS

Soy-Ginger Vinaigrette

1/3 cup soy sauce

3 tablespoons seasoned rice vinegar

1 tablespoon ginger root, minced

1/3 cup roasted peanut oil

Chicken Salad

1½ pounds skinless, boneless chicken breasts

1 (14-ounce) can low-sodium chicken broth

2 medium carrots (1 cup), peeled and sliced into ¼-inch rounds

6 ounces sugar snap peas, strings removed

2 celery stalks (1 cup), thinly sliced

3 green onions, thinly sliced

Romaine lettuce leaves, torn or chopped

1/3 cup salted, dry roasted peanuts, coarsely chopped

VINAIGRETTE INSTRUCTIONS

Combine the soy sauce, seasoned rice vinegar, ginger root and roasted peanut oil in a small bowl and whisk to combine. Set aside.

SALAD INSTRUCTIONS

Place chicken breasts in a pot, pour in chicken broth and enough water to cover. Bring to a boil over high heat, cover and reduce heat to low. Simmer chicken until tender and cooked through, about 20 minutes. Remove from pot and cool for about 5 minutes. Shred chicken while still warm and place in a large bowl.

Bring a small pot of water to a boil, add sliced carrots and cook for about 2 minutes, until tender-crisp. Remove from water with a slotted spoon and add to chicken. In the same pot of water, cook sugar snap peas for 1 to 2 minutes, drain and add to chicken. Add celery and green onions to bowl and toss to combine.

Just before serving, whisk vinaigrette and pour as much as desired over the chicken salad. Toss gently to combine. Place lettuce on four to six individual plates. Top with chicken mixture. Garnish with chopped peanuts. Best served immediately. Makes 4 to 6 servings. n

April is World Autism Awareness month.

It hits closer to home for our family this year, as we’ve recently discovered that our daughter is on the spectrum.

The diagnosis has felt overwhelming and life changing in many ways. And yet, Birdie has not changed. She is still the wonderful, smart, creative soul that she was before we knew she had autism.

I’ve been learning a lot and have realized that I held some false ideas about autism – which initially made it difficult to accept her diagnosis. Talking with other moms of autistic children, like Mellisa Hutchinson, of Lawrence, Kansas, has been eye-opening and comforting.

Hutchinson’s son, Wyatt, was diagnosed with autism at age seven. As a social worker, Hutchinson is no stranger to the work associated with advocating for a child’s needs. Their family embarked on a long and ongoing journey to support their son.

She quickly learned that many people have no idea what autism really looks like. Social media, movies and television often paint a vague and stereotypical picture. Those broad strokes leave room for misconceptions about what autistic individuals are capable of.

Autism Awareness A Mother’s Perspective

by

Here are a few things we would love for people to know:

1) Autism looks different for everyone. From level of functioning to communication to social skills – it really is a spectrum. If you’ve met an autistic individual, you’ve met one person with autism.

2) It’s okay to be curious and ask questions to better understand how autistic people (and their families) experience life. For example: “Tell me what autism looks like for your child.” This helps open a discussion of ways to interact with and support others in future encounters.

3) If someone in your life is diagnosed, prioritize selfeducation and familiarize yourself with resources. It’s often helpful to connect with a community for ongoing support and recommendations. Ask a lot of questions and don’t be afraid to advocate for the child – and yourself.

There is still much to learn about autism spectrum disorder (ASD), but we have made strides and raising awareness helps continue to move the needle. As mothers helping our children navigate life with autism, we want the same thing for our kids that most moms want: for them to be treated with kindness. n MUNITY

K elli S zrot

Michelle Rogne

midlife momentum

by K im G

hether provoked by empty-nest syndrome, the desire to get out of a rut or other life events, it’s common for women in their 40s and beyond to reexamine their lives. Thankfully, midlife doesn’t have to be ho-hum, nor provoke a crisis. It can be a rich time to plant and prune, making room for dormant dreams to flourish, or simply adding more joy to each day.

Whether midlifers reconnect with childhood passions or pursue new pastimes, they can reap multiple benefits including improved mental health and personal satisfaction.

“I’m a big fan of hobbies,” says Nancy Ann Hamilton, associate professor of psychology at the University of Kansas. “Even if you’re not the best at an activity, you’ll get better at it through repetition.”

Aside from tangible rewards, such as handknit scarves, colorful paintings or perfected soufflés, Hamilton says midlife hobbyists may experience eudaimonia—happiness derived from pursuing potential and fulfilling purpose.

How Learning Something

New

Can Create Joy, Improve Health and Reconnect You with Dormant Goals

“With whatever hobby you choose, you can increase your sense of self-efficacy and positive emotions, which can give you more confidence and contentment in other areas of your life too,” she says. “These activities have an organizing effect on your brain that can increase creative problem solving, and you’ll also have experiences that will make you more interesting, no matter what.”

Some people pursue hobbies out of curiosity. Others seek a meaningful diversion precipitated by catalysts such as divorce, death or the desire for career reinvention.

A New Career Path

Michelle Rogne, a ceramics teacher at the Lawrence Arts Center, moved to Lawrence 10 years ago, intent on earning a graduate degree in paleontology following a 15-year career as a field biologist. While preparing for the Graduate Record Exam and working in food service at the University of Kansas, she took a life-changing ceramics class at the Lawrence Arts Center.

“My mom did ceramics when I was a kid, painting pieces that had already been made,” she says. “I always liked painting pottery, but I really wanted to throw pots, and [later in life] I had the time to try it.”

Immediately hooked, Rogne scrapped her graduate school aspirations and drew from her biology background to design ceramic wildlife and other pieces, which she sold at small art fairs.

“I really enjoy creating things that I like myself and playing with imagery from parts of my life that are very personal to me,” says Rogne, who incorporates a lot of birds into her work.

While polishing her pottery skills is rewarding both as a profession and a pastime, Rogne says the most gratifying part of her career shift has been selling the items she’s made.

“Cute animals make people happy, and it’s fun connecting with customers over their selections,” she adds.

Rogne initially interned at the Lawrence Arts Center to learn how to make glazes and load and fire kilns. She had to persevere through rough patches, but enjoyed success early on in selling her work.

“It was difficult at first with so many steps to perfect to get to the end of the process,” she explains. “But I love problem solving and I kept at it until I finally conquered it. I almost quit at one point, but eventually it got easier.”

Now an instructor herself, Rogne’s personal experience combined with professional expertise helps her relate to students and reassure them when their initial efforts go awry.

“I’m able to ease their frustration and reassure them about their progress,” she says. “I see them improving faster than I did, because I can show them how to avoid the issues that once gave me trouble.”

Just for Kicks

While some hobbies may become a way to earn money, most are about experimentation and play. Hamilton says it can be life changing to let go of expectations that may have held people back in the past.

“In midlife, we often have more money and time to pursue our passions and the goal should be pleasure, not perfection,” she says. “Find something that connects with your values and have fun.”

My mom did ceramics when I was a kid, painting pieces that had already been made. I always liked painting pottery, but I really wanted to throw pots, and [later in life] I had the time to try it.”

– MICHELLE

Michelle Rogne, a ceramics instructor at the Lawrence Arts Center, enjoys creating pottery that makes people happy.

ROGNE

HAMILTON has revived a few dormant skills herself. She studied French in high school and college but retained little of it. Later in life, she picked it back up using the Duolingo app, hoping to converse with locals on a family trip to Europe. Since then, she has continued studying the language by reading French literature.

Hamilton also started sewing again to maintain a connection with her mother, a skilled seamstress and painter who died in 2018.

“Sewing was something we had always shared,” recalls Hamilton. “I loved the problem-solving and spatial rotation aspects of sewing back then, and now it’s cool to wear what I’ve made.”

Captivated by trending granny square apparel and accessories, Hamilton turned to YouTube videos and online sewing groups for instruction and inspiration. While online classes, resources and libraries can prove helpful in exploring ideas and honing skills, she says meeting in person can provide additional benefits.

“Socialization is so important. Not just for our emotional health, but our physical well-being too,” Hamilton says. “Learning with others is a great way to make friends. There’s nothing wrong with watching TikTok videos, but I think my grandmothers’ quilting bees were a great way to combine creativity and conversation.”

Hamilton’s grandmothers were prolific quilters and crocheters during the Depression, resulting in a treasure trove of inherited tatted handkerchiefs, embroidered pillowcases and doilies.

“Even though they had few resources, they tried to make the items that they used every day beautiful,” she says. “We deserve to give ourselves permission to create and bring beauty to our lives through our interests, just for our own pleasure, without apology.” n

Permission to Pursue Your Passion

Sip your favorite beverage and sit with yourself awhile to spark ideas. What do you want at this point in your life? Whatever you settle on, there’s a community resource or URL waiting to tell you more. Here are a few ideas to get you started.

CURIOUS ABOUT COOKING?

The Culinary Center of Kansas City

7920 Santa Fe Dr., Overland Park, KS | kcculinary.com

Sweet! Baking & Candy Supply

Fairlawn Mall, 5331 SW 22nd Place, Topeka, KS  sweet-baking-supply.shoplightspeed.com

Taste Buds Kitchen

5336 W 151st St., Leawood, Kansas  tastebudskitchen.com/leawood/

LOOKING FOR A BOOK CLUB?

Rainy Day Books

2706 W 53rd St., Fairway, KS | rainydaybooks.com

Roundtable Book Store

826 N Kansas Ave., Topeka, KS roundtablebookstore.com/book-clubs

The Raven

809 Massachusetts St., Lawrence, KS | ravenbookstore.com

NEED TO KNOW HOW TO KNIT?

Yak ‘n Yarn, Fairlawn Mall

5331 SW 22nd Place, Topeka, KS | yaknyarn.net

Yarn Barn of Kansas

930 Massachusetts St., Lawrence, KS | masterclass.com

The Studio

9555 Nall Ave., Overland Park, KS | thestudiokc.com

WANT TO RIDE BIKES?

Cycling Kansas City cyclingkc.org

Kaw Valley Bicycle Club kvbc.org

Lawrence Bicycle Club lawrencebicycleclub.org

LIKE ONLINE LECTURES AND LESSONS? Master Class masterclass.com

One Day University

onedayu.com

Take Lessons takelessons.com

BONUS TIP IF YOU’RE 60+

As a non-degree-seeking Kansas resident, you can take free college courses. No homework required!

Nancy Ann Hamilton

Fractured Focus? Get CRAFTY!

by M elia sto C kha M , p h D

It’s after dinner. Dishes are done and it’s time to relax, right? Not so fast – your son has a game tomorrow. After scouring his room, you find his jersey in a filthy wad under the bed. You toss it in the wash, remembering in a panic that you signed up for snack duty. As you’re rummaging the cabinets for anything that resembles a healthy snack, your daughter asks for help with algebra. You rack your brain trying to remember the order of operations (something about PANDAS?), then finally plop down on the couch. Wow, that evening went fast. The next morning you hear, “Hey Mom, where’s my jersey?” Um, wet in the washer. Whoops.

Or, how about this? Beep-beep-beep! You grab your phone to silence the alarm and see two new email notifications and a calendar reminder. What’s that reminder for? You click it. Wasn’t that cancelled? You go to your email to confirm but start reading new messages instead. Now your mind is spinning with tomorrow’s growing to-do list. You head upstairs to brush your teeth. Bing! Calendar reminder. Wasn’t that cancelled? Oh right, you meant to check on that. You find yourself standing in the middle of your bedroom and can’t remember why.

Your focus is fractured. It’s okay. Everyone’s is. If you’re ready to face fractured focus head on, go ahead and throw your phone out the window – and your kids while you’re at it. Sound ridiculous? So is the idea that you can magically remove every bing, bloop and “Mom!” from your day.

Instead, try adding focus. Even 10 minutes of mindful attention can help increase your sense of calm, boost your overall self-esteem and leave you feeling refreshed.

We’ve all heard about the benefits of meditation and yoga. But here’s another idea – channel your inner Martha Stewart and get crafty.

Crafting simply involves manual dexterity and a little creativity. You don’t need talent or expensive supplies, just an avenue for you to use your mind and your hands in a tactile way. Choose a small activity that you can finish in one sitting or make progress toward a larger project. The results will be the same: a little dopamine boost for the brain that makes you feel accomplished and awesome. n

PROJECT IDEAS

Paper Crafts

Making Cards

Folding Origami

Collage & Decoupage

Rolled Paper Beads

Yarn and String Crafts

Knitting & Crochet

Embroidery & Cross-Stitch

Friendship Bracelets

Paint Crafts

Tape Stencils

Pour Painting

Pulled-String Painting

Pen & Pencil Crafts

Coloring Books

Calligraphy Tutorials

Sharpie Dot Ceramics

Household Goods Crafts

Coffee Filter Flowers

Wine Cork Wreaths

Ribbon- or Lace-Wrapped Jars

Painted or Colored Clothespins

Elaina Paige Thomas

Take a Step Back To DESTINY

by L onita C ook // phot ography by Jason Dai L ey

“Who run the world? Girls.” – Beyoncé

Young Elaina Paige Thomas hears a voice, faint in the distance. That means you, okay?

Light sweeps over her third-grade face as she sits at the brown wooden desk, the chatter of peers all around, threatening to pierce the veil. But she doesn’t quite hear them either. She’s between worlds.

Elaina’s daydreaming delivers a potential destiny. Three major points revealed in her reverie become guideposts for her future: 1) work with her idol – renowned dancer and choreographer, Debbie Allen; 2) become a professional dancer; and 3) open a studio/agency.

With the powerful force of innocence, little Elaina Paige accepts fate’s assignment.

SPOTLIGHT: ELAINA PAIGE THOMAS

Networking is not about take, take, take. It’s about mutual take and give. How can we help each other? Not just help me, help me.

I established awesome relationships early on because I was genuine. I’ve always been the type to want to help everyone.”

– ELAINA PAIGE THOMAS

THE NEXT PAIGE TALENT AGENCY, Kansas City’s first Black- and woman-owned talent management company, was born of that future-gazing moment of its owner and founder. Thomas, a Kansas City native, is a popular figure in entertainment. She’s been a background dancer for Beyoncé, toured Asia as a professional and returned home as a gift to aspiring Kansas and Missouri creatives of all ages.

Today, Thomas offers her experience to those she represents, bolstering their talent with professional tools. But several twists, turns and leaps of faith came first, as the light that warmed that dreamy day in third grade illuminated her path.

“A lot of people don’t know this about my story, but I actually got kicked out of Lincoln – for fighting,” Thomas recalls.

During her middle school years, Thomas attended the prestigious Lincoln College Preparatory Academy in Kansas City up until this incident.

“My mother made a huge sacrifice and moved us to Lee’s Summit,” says Thomas.

Self-disappointment loomed over a Thomas too young to understand the phrase “take a step back to leap forward.” But fate showed its face and started to make good on the vision. As it turned out, this bit of “throwing these hands” led her to the school where she would get her introductory taste of becoming a first: Thomas was crowned the first Black homecoming queen of Lee’s Summit North High School.

Columbia College Chicago is where her calling came into full view. Thomas was transformed from a pre-professional – having trained from the age of three in ballet, tap and modern – into a developed dancer, poised for the global stage.

“I was exposed locally to the arts, to the mentorship and to many people who believed in my talent. When I went to train in Chicago, I had the foundation and then I was able to layer on development pieces I needed to be successful,” Thomas says. “Having the foundation really helped, but having access to a larger market, the educators, mentors and networks – those resources helped navigate me toward successful outcomes.”

Wanting to be a well-rounded artist, Thomas enrolled in history, anatomy, business, writing, speech and finance in addition to dance.

“I was embedded in the industry and became more than just a dancer,” she says. “I learned how to understand the business aspect of it. I became a performer and learned to be a brand.”

It was here that the first goal was checked off her childhood to-do list when Debbie Allen set one of her dance pieces. Thomas combined this experience and her education into showwomanship. This put her in an excellent position to achieve her second checkpoint: becoming a professional dancer. With the fortune of good timing on her side, a friend within her network phoned to invite her to audition for none other than Queen Bey.

“It’s a lot about who you know, the connections – no – the relationships that you’ve made,” Thomas says. “Networking is not about take, take, take. It’s about mutual take and give. How can we help each other? Not just help me, help me. I established awesome relationships early on because I was genuine. I’ve always been the type to want to help everyone.”

It was well-cultivated relationships, ballet technique and vogue learned from the culture that helped secure a spot on Beyoncé’s 2011 “Run the World” debut performance on Oprah Winfrey’s final show.

“I loved the shoulder action. That is a staple. In rehearsals, our shoulders would be so tired. But we had to get the undulations and isolations of the shoulder patterns just right. We were in rehearsals eight to ten hours working shoulders. But that was one of my favorite moves.”

Thomas synthesized her talent, education and childhood dreaming into an international tour with Bey. It didn’t come without hard work, which is something she has in common with the multifaceted star.

“Bey is an amazing woman to work with. She would come to rehearsals. She is a haaard worker. People have no clue. She is a business woman. That, itself, impressed on me, to see her work ethic,” Thomas recalls.

“Being on the road is tiring. The money is great, but they wear you out. [Even so], I would never trade that magical moment in our lives. The day of the first show, we were backstage praying together. We were right there, holding hands with Beyoncé.”

It was in this enormous moment that Thomas found alignment, reminding herself to stay focused on the prevailing innocence of her third-grade inner child as she scaled up. Post-tour, Thomas returned to the Kansas City area where she continued to elevate her resume, strategizing and choreographing for artists like Black Eyed Peas, Tyrese and Genuine. She also

worked with former Kansas City Chief, Tamba Hali, as he transitioned into his music career.

She was successful, and yet there was a third aspiration waiting to be realized. Thomas had that feeling, a déjà vu sensation summoning her to the vision, reminding her of the blueprint. That inner girl was tugging on her soul like an attentiondemanding child pulling on coattails. She was saying, It’s time. But Thomas stayed put in her fulltime artistic role.

Her sister urged her forward, “‘You just need to quit – just let it go. Just go ’head and start your spot.’” Thomas recalls her sister’s encouragement. “And I’d say, ‘Yeah, yeah, I should. One day.’”

As she continued to drag her feet, it seems other forces aligned to give her a nudge. Thomas was terminated from her safe, full-time job. Fate once again teaching her to take a step back so she could leap forward into purpose.

“I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know where to turn,” she says. “A month after that, I was able to get the keys to this spot.”

This spot is a brick-and-mortar business owned by Thomas. The Next Paige Talent Agency aims to be an oasis for searching and aspiring Kansas and Missouri creatives, artisans and technicians vying for representation, training and networking. There are classes and workshops, plus scholarships through The Next Paige Foundation. Thomas wants to make professional development and talent management accessible, the kind that could result in international credentials for students.

Professional actor and model Jamie Addison believes there are many talented people in the community who can benefit from Thomas’ input.

“Elaina is an exceptional woman and I’m forever grateful that God placed her in my life,” Addison says. “It was her guidance and belief in me that led me to really get serious about the craft of acting…a journey that has blossomed from actor, to writer and soon-to-be filmmaker.”

According to Addison, the agency unlocks access to the industry and equips students with training resources to sharpen their talent while covering topics such as etiquette, networking and branding.

Thomas is happy to open her doors wide and wants to help provide a purpose for the next generation.

“I don’t want to scale up in my business. I want to scale deep in this community,” she says. “As I scale, I stay focused on the young girl I was. I sit in this space and think, ‘I dreamed of this.’” n

& I Do’s I Don’ts

Caitlyn Westerhouse at J. Lynn Bridal

That magical moment of pure bliss when you know you’ve found The One. No, not your partner – the dress! There’s nothing quite like it. The fit, the fabric – each delicate detail dancing in rhythm to personify your personality.

When you’ve found the look you’ll rock on your wedding day, nothing can bring you down. Forget the burnt appetizer, the sweltering heat, Aunt Susan breaking into the tequila six hours before her self-imposed speech at the reception. No matter what uncontrollable factors may arise, YOU get to choose your dress and can face it all looking amazing.

So how do you find the ultimate dress to impress? We spoke with two wedding attire experts to get the inside scoop on what’s trending in bridal wear for spring and summer.

earls are popping up everywhere – the dress, the veil and even the shoes. We are seeing more delicate jewelry and accessories with a statement heel.”

– EMILY HART

above photo courtesy of emily hart bridal, kansas city

Dress to Dazzle

A colorful dreamscape is emerging for brides searching for head-turning wedding dresses. According to TheKnot.com, pastel shades in blue and blush are growing in popularity, a softly whimsical take. Some brides, however, are going full glam with bold metallics, eye-catching print and bursts of popping color. Others who want versatility may opt for two styles, adding a jumpsuit or cocktail dress as a “second look” outfit.

Contemporary touches like matte lace, super sparkly fabrics, slits and detachable sleeves are cutting edge. But for a timeless look, think ivory pearls.

“Pearls are here to stay,” says Emily Hart, owner and designer of Emily Hart Bridal in Kansas City. “Pearls are popping up everywhere – the dress, the veil and even the shoes. We are seeing more delicate jewelry and accessories with a statement heel.”

Minimalism paired with a gasp-worthy shoe is something Jena Lynn Dick can get behind. The owner of J. Lynn Bridal in Lawrence recommends block heel sandals. These trendy, wide-based shoes allow for maximum support and relief for staying on your feet all day.

Finishing Touches

In addition to classic pearls, hair accessories like headbands, large hairpins and combs, and mini-length veils have been spotted down the bridal runway. Oversized is IN – embellishments such as white feathers and large bows invoke royal ambitions.

To prepare for uncertain weather forecasts, consider shawls and capes as an alluring addition that does double-duty to keep you comfy and cozy.

“I like my brides to take into consideration that it’s a long day wearing their wedding dress,” Dick says. “There are many things to consider: comfort, warmth, restriction of movement. The last thing I want is for a bride to regret their dress decision.”

Your choice of wedding venue sets the vibe and undoubtedly influences the dress decision. Hart offers up some Pinterest-worthy inspiration: “A long train looks stunning in a cathedral; an intimate rose garden is the perfect location for a romantic lace gown; and a sunset on the beach makes the perfect backdrop for a flowy chiffon skirt to blow in the wind.”

ll the rules are out the window, in my opinion, for mom. Wear what color and style you love so you can feel 100 percent confident that day!”

– JENA LYNN DICK

#BrideSquadGoals

Instead of choosing matching gowns for your wedding party, it’s becoming popular to offer coordinating options. This allows bridesmaids the autonomy to represent their personal style and select something they would wear again. Mixing and matching fabrics like silk and velvet is an elegant way to maintain color consistency.

Mothers are also getting more say in choosing what they want to wear these days. Even black is back on the table.

“We spend a lot of time choosing pieces that a mom can feel her very best in — like the guest of honor that she is,” says Hart. “All the rules are out the window, in my opinion, for mom. Wear what color and style you love so you can feel 100 percent confident that day!”

One thing that will never go out of style is letting brides have their moment.

“It’s still not cool to outshine the people getting married. That will never be a trend. Just a reminder to those that need that reminder,” Dick says with a smile.

Happily Ever After

The new season offers plenty of exciting styles and inspiration for brides to draw from when creating a fairy-tale wedding day. Dare to be bold or go classic. Whatever style you choose, it will be a unique reflection of you and your partner’s love story.

Ultimately, according to Hart, “All that matters is that you feel beautiful, and comfortable and loved.”

CONTINUED P. 38 »

Emily Hart Bridal is a dreamy escape from the ordinary, where each bride and her entourage can spend quality time finding their perfect dress. “At Emily Hart Bridal, you will experience a cozy, unique and special time unlike any other shopping experience,” says Hart. “Each and every person that walks through our doors can feel the energy and love that will surround them during their time here.”

Jena Lynn Dick has made blissful dreams come true at J. Lynn Bridal for 10 magical years. She’s pleased to provide the time-honored experience of wedding gown shopping for Lawrence brides. “We truly are a small business. I interact with my employees and customers daily. We really listen to our clients and take their input to heart,” Dick says. n

Dear Mama,

I’m divorced and still getting back in the swing of dating. I’ve been seeing somebody for about a month, and he recently surprised me by booking a dream vacation to Italy. Here’s the kicker—I’d been planning to break it off before the trip came up. He’s really nice and I keep trying to talk myself into liking him. But…I’m just not that into him. Can I still go to Italy? Please? There’s no way I could afford this trip otherwise, so this feels like my only shot!

– Trippin’ in KC

IMO–In Mama’s OPINION

Dear Trippin’,

First of all, congratulations on getting back out and dating again. And double cheers for being able and willing to assess whether your dates have potential to be mates rather than settling for the first fidanzato who comes along.

It sounds like you’ve had a fun month getting to know this guy and have shared enough hopes and dreams with each other to inspire him to book this bucket-list trip. Unfortunately, it also sounds like the relationship, like old prosecco, may have lost its fizz.

Before you decide whether to fly off into the Italian sunset together or let him fly away solo, you need to have an honest conversation with him. Be extremely clear that—prior to this invitation—you had intended to cool your jets and don’t want to prolong the inevitable or mislead him by joining him on a romantic European adventure.

Note: In Mama's Opinion is for entertainment purposes only.

(I assume he was planning on paying for this trip? Tbh, I’m not sure if such a grand gesture at this point in a relationship is incredibly sweet, ballsy, or creepy…but I digress.)

If he fully comprehends your dwindling feelings for him yet still wants to travel with you, and you trust he will honor your boundaries, AND you would enjoy traveling with him for who he is, as he is…then insist on splitting the tab, paying for your own room and going as travel buddies.

However, if your only interest in continuing the relationship is to get an all-expenses-paid trip, then you probably need to be the nice gal who will say arrivederci and set him free to find someone who will reciprocate his feelings. n

fortuna, Mama

Buona

Mary Doveton

LIFE BEYOND THE LIMELIGHT

Theatre Lawrence’s Mary Doveton Stages

Her Exit, Ready to Take on New Roles

by A my C. K elly // photogr A phy by JA son DA iley

IT’S HARD TO TALK TO MARY DOVETON WITHOUT DISCUSSING THEATRE AT SOME POINT. If you don’t mention it, she probably will. This isn’t surprising, in light of her 45 years in the business.

But there’s more to discover about Doveton’s life behind the scenes. Married 52 years, with two grown children and four grandchildren, there has been plenty to occupy her time. And now, she finds herself with more opportunity to explore interests beyond theatre.

In March of 2023, Doveton retired from Theatre Lawrence, an organization she founded in 1977. The endeavor evolved from a small, spirited group of amateur theatre enthusiasts and grew to become an award-winning community theatre, housed in a 35,000-square-foot facility.

Doveton’s love for theatre began early in life. By age five, she was an avid reader and recalls being swept away by the magic of storytelling after seeing a production of “Rumpelstiltskin.”

“They spun straw into gold!” Doveton relates her childhood excitement with glee. “My whole life, I have loved stories. I love reading them, creating them, visiting them, sharing them, drawing people into them. The idea of exploring new and different worlds just enthralls me.”

Her love for storytelling soon developed into a career aspiration. An Iowa native, Doveton continued living at home while majoring in theatre at Clarke University in Dubuque. Her path took an unexpected turn when she moved to Lawrence to pursue a master’s in theatre at the University of Kansas.

The late 60s and early 70s were turbulent times. Race riots, arson and civil protests were becoming commonplace. As a graduate student, Doveton attended the May 8, 1970 rally where Chancellor Laurence Chalmers, surrounded by Black Panthers, was deciding whether to close the KU campus.

As Doveton cheered and jeered at the speeches, she noticed that the tall, buttoned-up Englishman sitting next to her was equally animated. The pair hit it off. In early June, she accepted John Doveton’s proposal of marriage, only weeks before he left to work as a petrophysicist at an oil well site 200 miles outside of Calgary, Canada. Six months later, the newlyweds honeymooned onsite after John smuggled his bride in, defying the “no women allowed” rule.

Mary Doveton found living in Calgary captivating. The booming oil industry attracted people from all over the world. She had never seen anything like it.

“Because the weather was so frigid, the social life was amazing,” she recalls. “The Foreign Film Society was hugely popular!”

Doveton felt she was among her people, though the culture was not without its pitfalls. When she applied to be a drama specialist at the University of Calgary, Doveton was required to pass a spelling and typing test—because she was a woman.

The Dovetons ultimately landed back in Lawrence, where John taught at KU and worked for the Kansas Geological Survey. Mary was teaching in Topeka when she had the idea to start a theatre company. She gathered a fledgling group of volunteers who pooled their resources and raised $500 (the equivalent of about $2,500 today). Using a cigar box as the “box office,” Mary selected and directed the company’s first show, now with little 18-month Clare in tow.

The theatre had to operate on a cash basis because securing a bank loan was out of the question. In 1974, women had only just secured the right to apply for personal credit cards in their own names.

“Mostly we got laughed at,” Doveton says of her attempts to secure financing. It would be another 10 years before a woman was allowed to get a smallbusiness loan without a male co-signer. None of this dissuaded Mary Doveton.

“She’s a take-charge person,” her husband says, “but she rarely brought her work home.”

Mary agrees that she tried to maintain her private life apart from her work life as much as possible, considering the nature of her career.

Sometimes, however, she did bring her work home—cast parties were said to be frequent and lively. The couple also enjoyed entertaining scientists from all over the world through John’s university connections.

Mary Doveton is a recipient of the prestigious Art Cole Lifetime of Leadership Award given by the American Association of Community Theatre (AACT).

Meanwhile, the Dovetons were raising two children.

“It was never unusual to think that a woman could do whatever she wanted, or that having art as a career was anything but normal,” Clare Doveton says of her childhood.

After her mother’s theatre company landed its first home at 15th and New Hampshire, Clare and her brother, Mike Doveton, would often pop over to the theatre after school. Clare fondly remembers exploring the costume shop, visiting the green room where the actors prepared and napping in the vintage pews that served as audience seating.

“A theatre is a magical place to raise a kid!” she laughs. “Everywhere we went, people knew my mom. It was as if we were a part of it.”

The family would typically spend a few hours together over dinner before Mary headed back to the theatre for rehearsal. John spent most evenings at home, “sitting with his pipe by the fireplace, and a yellow legal pad in his lap, writing a book,” according to his daughter.

Though he was sometimes called the “odd one out” for being a scientist, Mary says her husband was crucial to her success with the theatre.

“I could not have done anything I have done without John,” she says. “He is the most supportive person I could ever wish for.”

Raised in post-World War II England, John Doveton watched both of his parents work through the war and continue to work afterward in rebuilding efforts. In later years, his father managed the White Rock Theatre in Hastings, so he knew live entertainment venues could be successful.

CONTINUED

Top: Mary and John Doveton

Bottom: (left to right) Doveton with Theatre Lawrence technical crew member Danny Rogovein and technical director James Diemer

I could not have done anything I have done without John. He is the most supportive person I could ever wish for.”

– Mary Doveton

More importantly, he knew his wife.

“She had been told growing up in Iowa not to push herself forward or be assertive, and yet was strongly encouraged to do whatever she wanted in life,” he says.

Mary Doveton did precisely that. With calm persistence, she ushered a community theatre through four decades of growth and challenges (including small floods and a 2003 fire). She staged hundreds of productions, engaged thousands of volunteers and entertained generations of people. Her unwavering resolve also led her to spearhead a $7.2 million capital campaign to build a new facility at Bauer Farm.

All the while, the Dovetons continued to help guide their now-adult kids and have joyfully embraced grandparenthood.

“Mom retired? This I cannot envision!”

Clare Doveton laughs at the idea. “She needs to be busy. I cannot imagine her not doing something. It will be rather exciting to see what grabs her attention.”

Many others in the Lawrence community, who think of Mary Doveton’s name as synonymous with Theatre Lawrence, quite likely share this sentiment. Doveton herself seems to agree.

“I am looking forward to the next adventure!” she says. For whatever that may be, Doveton is ready. n

Top: Mary and John Doveton

Middle: (clockwise) Mary, John, Clare and Mike Doveton

Bottom: The Doveton family in 2023. (left to right) Mike, Jayda, Maya, Andrea, John, Mary, Willis, Clint, Clare, Jackson

Mom retired? This I cannot envision!”

– Clare Doveton

Clare Doveton is a contemporary artist in Lawrence. Mike Doveton is a park ranger doing educational programming and exhibits at Independence National Historical Park in Philadelphia.

The Jayhawk Club has a wide-range of membership options for people of all ages. From our most popular Golf membership, which includes full access to the 18-hole championship golf course, to our Social membership, where you can enjoy the family-friendly, resort-style pool and exciting social calendar with events scheduled throughout the year; The Jayhawk Club has something for everyone.

FASCIA » THE BODY’S OVERACHIEVER

Could Your Fascia Be a Hidden Source of Pain?

B y K erry H agner , LMT, BCTMB

Fascia is quite the buzzword as of late and rightfully so. But what is it, exactly?

Simply put, fascia is a connective tissue that envelops all muscles, organs, vessels and nerves. It connects the whole body, gives us our structure and creates our posture.

Until recently, fascia was merely known as the tough stuff anatomists cut through when studying the human body (much like layers of plastic wrap). We now understand that fascia is an organized matrix of collagen fibers suspended in a gel-like substance. When healthy, these fibers balance stability with flexibility.

Where It Goes Wrong (Or Too Right)

The nature of fascia is to thicken and harden under chronic strain or injury to provide extra stability to vulnerable structures. Similarly, fascia adapts to held postures, such as slouching at the computer or looking down at our phones. It mirrors the way we hold ourselves, thickening in areas where we are out of alignment with gravity.

Fascia is very good at its job—often too good. Rigidly bound fascia becomes dehydrated and inflexible, causing pain and reduced range of motion. It can put immense pressure on the areas it envelops, as much as 2,000 pounds per square inch – ouch!

Myofascial Release to the Rescue

Myofascial release (MFR) therapy uses our body’s natural processes to promote fascial restructuring and restore hydration and flexibility. Gentle, sustained pressure on restricted fascia triggers a neuro-chemical response that increases blood flow, reduces inflammation and elongates tissues.

No two MFR sessions are the same. There are common fascial restriction patterns, but ultimately your fascia is the unique architectural story of you. A session will often start “where it hurts” and lead to unexpected places. Fascia connects your whole body, and like a snag in your favorite sweater, a pull in one corner may cause a pull in another.

To find a myofascial release therapist near you, visit mfrtherapists.com. n

SUPPORTING YOUR FASCIA

Bring awareness to how you hold your body in stillness. Over time, these positions become reinforced by your fascia.

Our bodies are not designed to be stationary. Make time throughout the day for gentle movement.

Kerry Hagner is a Lawrence-based massage therapist and yoga teacher specializing in myofascial release. Visit her at surefootingbodywork.com for information about upcoming workshops on self-MFR.

Yin

yoga and restorative yoga – or any practice where gentle stretches are held for long durations – support the health of your fascia.

OUTDOOR LIVING SPACES

Outdoor living rooms have become one of the most requested features in new home construction and renovations in the Midwest.

While this boom was initially prompted by the pandemic, mild weather continues to inspire homeowners to create comfortable four-season living areas in their backyards. These spaces are luxurious and welcoming with amenities like fire pits, all-weather televisions, outdoor kitchens, spas and swimming pools.

Whether you’re looking to host family gatherings or simply provide a place to unwind after a long day, you can transform your outdoor living space into a welcoming extension of your home with the right design elements and furniture.

CONTINUED P. 54 »

NATURAL POOLS are a great alternative to traditional chlorine pools using perennial plants and water flora instead of chemicals to filter the water.

PLANNING

There are several questions you should answer to create an outdoor living plan before you start designing:

USE: How will you use your outdoor space? Do you like to entertain or would you prefer a quiet space to relax? Is lounge seating important? A dining area? Outdoor cooking? Your answers will help determine how the space interacts with your home, neighbors and other areas of your yard.

LOCATION: How does the outdoor room connect with your interior living spaces and existing yard? Do you want to create a space directly off your main living room or kitchen, or are you looking for something more removed and engaged with your yard and landscaping?

EXISTING CONDITIONS: Take note of what you already have in your yard. For instance, is there a large tree or pool you would like to feature? Consider the views both into and out of your outdoor room. What might your neighbors see and hear? What scenery would you like to enjoy?

ENCLOSURE: How much structure do you want to create for your space? Would you prefer an open-air, covered or a fully screened patio?

FEATURES: What other aspects do you want to incorporate into the space? Heaters, water fountains, gardens and yard games are all fun elements to include.

A small freestanding pool house contains a private shower and dressing room as well as a covered outdoor kitchen. The pool deck wraps around the pool and integrates with the main house, connecting the two spaces and creating an outdoor lounge area.”

DESIGN & CONSTRUCTION

Once you define the parameters of your space, you can begin the design and construction process. Depending on the size and scope of your outdoor living area, you might consider hiring a landscape designer and contractor to help bring your vision to life.

To find the right team, start your search online for local companies that specialize in outdoor rooms and landscaping. It’s a good idea to interview least two companies. Review their portfolio and referrals for similar-sized projects and ask whether they provide both design and construction, or if you will need to hire a separate contractor. You’ll also want to inquire about landscaping installation, plant warranties and maintenance plans.

It’s important not to rush this process. Make sure you’re happy with the design decisions and allow enough time for a quality build out. Timing for this phase will depend on the size of your project and weather conditions, but a reasonable schedule is four to six months from start to finish.

TRENDS & FEATURES FOR OUTDOOR LIVING ROOMS

If the footprint of your outdoor room is already defined on a deck or patio, adding furniture and accessories is a great DIY spring project. Here are a few ideas to refresh the look and feel:

FIREPITS, FIREPLACES AND HEATERS: Most outdoor rooms include a heat source. Our relatively mild winters in Kansas lend to hanging out around a firepit with smores and enjoying the night sky. Overhead heaters are a great addition, offering instant radiant heat for a cozy outdoor space.

ENTERTAINMENT: Why not enjoy an outdoor game on a lovely spring day? Weather-resistant speakers and televisions make excellent additions for entertaining friends and family. Consider including Jenga, chess, corn hole or other games that are fun for all ages.

KITCHENS: Our region is home to barbeque for good reason – we can use grills and smokers almost year-round. Many homeowners also include pizza ovens, refrigeration and sinks to create a true outdoor kitchen experience.

SCREENED PORCHES: Most new homes feature a screened porch as part of the outdoor living room, offering protection from bugs and rain. A ceiling fan is essential for comfort on hot summer days and nights.

PATIO GARDENS: You don’t need acres of land to have an herb and vegetable garden. Using methods such as square-foot gardening, you can create a bounty of produce using large-scale plots and planters. A container garden adds lovely color and texture to the décor.

LIGHTING: Ambient lighting is a key feature for your space. You don’t need to light up the whole yard, just the areas around seating and dining. Keep it simple –small battery-operated outdoor table lamps and string lights are a great way to add a soft glow.

FURNITURE AND SEATING: Design your seating area much like you would an indoor living or dining room. Large outdoor sectionals paired with side chairs create a cozy lounge feel. For the dining space, a simple large table with chairs and a bench work well for everyday family use while offering the flexibility to host larger parties. Side tables and small decorative accessories make the whole space feel more relaxed and inviting.

Now that spring has sprung, there’s no time like the present to start planning your outdoor living space. With the right tools and techniques, you can easily transform your backyard into an oasis. From adding a deck or patio to creating a garden or outdoor living room, there are plenty of ways to make your backyard more enjoyable and inviting, with the potential bonus of increasing the value of your home. What’s not to love? n

Katie Hoke is owner and principal at Hoke Ley Architecture & Design with offices in Lawrence and Kansas City. She has more than 20 years of experience and leads the interior architecture and design studio at the firm.

Women & Financial STRATEGIES

Provided by Christopher A. Adams

Women who share money management duties with their partner tend to take on a lion’s share of the responsibility for the household finances. Yet only 18% of women feel very confident in their ability to fully retire with a comfortable lifestyle.1,2 Although more women are providing for their families, when it comes to preparing for retirement, they may be leaving their future to chance.

WOMEN & COLLEGE The reason behind this disparity doesn’t seem to be a lack of education or independence. Today, women are more likely to go to college and graduate than men. So what keeps them from taking charge of their long-term financial picture?3

One reason may be a lack of confidence. One study found that only 55% of women feel confident in their ability to manage their finances. Women may shy away from discussing money because they don’t want to appear uneducated or naive and hesitate to ask questions as a result.4

INSIDER LANGUAGE

Since Wall Street traditionally has been a male-dominated field, women whose expertise lies in other areas may feel uneasy amidst complex calculations and long-term financial projections. Just the jargon of personal finance can be intimidating: 401(k), 403(b), fixed, variable. To someone inexperienced in the field of personal finance, it may seem like an entirely different language.5 But women need to keep one eye looking toward retirement since they may live longer and could potentially face higher healthcare expenses than men.

If you have left your long-term financial strategy to chance, now is the time to pick up the reins and retake control. Consider talking with a financial professional about your goals and ambitions for retirement. Don’t be afraid to ask for clarification if the conversation turns to something unfamiliar. No one was born knowing the ins and outs of compound interest, but it’s important to understand in order to make informed decisions.

COMPOUND INTEREST

What’s the Hype?

INSIDER LANGUAGE Compound interest may be one of the greatest secrets of smart investing. And time is the key to making the most of it. If you invested $250,000 in an account earning 6%, at the end of 20 years your account would be worth $801,784. However, if you waited 10 years, then started your investment program, you would end up with only $447,712.

This is a hypothetical example used for illustrative purposes only. It does not represent any specific investment or combination of investments

The content is developed from sources believed to be providing accurate information. The information in this material is not intended as tax or legal advice. It may not be used for the purpose of avoiding any federal tax penalties. Please consult legal or tax professionals for specific information regarding your individual situation. This material was developed and produced by FMG Suite to provide information on a topic that may be of interest. FMG Suite is not affiliated with the named broker-dealer, state- or SEC-registered investment advisory firm. The opinions expressed and material provided are for general information, and should not be considered a solicitation for the purchase or sale of any security. Copyright FMG Suite.

Securities offered through Registered Representatives of Cambridge Investment Research, Inc., a broker-dealer, member FINRA/SIPC. Advisory services offered through Cambridge Investment Research Advisors Inc., a Registered Investment Adviser. DM Bruce Associates and Cambridge are not affiliated

1. HerMoney.com, April 12, 2022; 2. TransAmericaCenter.org, 2021; 3. Brookings.edu, October 8, 2021; 4. CNBC.com, June 8, 2022; 5. Distributions from 401(k), 403(b), and most other employer-sponsored retirement plans are taxed as ordinary income and, if taken before age 59, may be subject to a 10% federal income tax penalty. Generally, once you reach age 73, you must begin taking required minimum distributions.