Family matters july2014

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FAMILY MATTERS 17| THE VOICE JULY 31 - AUGUST 6, 2014

FAMILY MATTERS

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July 31 - August 6, 2014 | PAGE 17-24

ADOPTION IN FOCUS

INSIDE t Legislation: New children and families act

t Special feature: Sutton family finder t Adoption process: 10 steps to success

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page 18 page 19 - 21 page 22


18| THE VOICE JULY 31 - AUGUST 6, 2014

FAMILY MATTERS

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NEW CHANGES TO THE LAW WILL SPEED UP THE ADOPTION PROCESS The new Children and Families Act was given royal assent earlier this year and will mean changes to the law to give greater protection to vulnerable children SPONSORED FEATURES EDITOR Jacqueline Asafu-Adjaye

N

ew rules, introduced, aim to speed up the adoption system and reduce delay come into force this month. The changes are intended to reduce delays for black and ethnic minority children and give adopters a much more active role in finding children they might be suitable to adopt. Children and Families Minister Edward Timpson said: “We’ve seen promising progress in the last 12 months – a significant rise in adoptions and a huge increase in the number of adopters, but I’m determined to do everything in my power to make sure the 6,000 children waiting are offered safe and caring homes. “Our reforms to the register, greater use of fostering for adoption and the removal of unnecessary delay will mean would-be adopters can play a greater role in the process and help ensure children are placed with a new loving family much more quickly.� The reforms include: t 3FNPWJOH CBSSJFST CZ FOTVS

ing ethnicity is not prioritised over other factors – such as the ability to provide a stable, loving home. t "CPMJTIJOH SFTUSJDUJPOT PO the register so approved adopters can actively search for children they might wish to adopt t *OUSPEVDJOH OFX SVMFT requiring councils actively to consider fostering for adoption places where appropriate t 1MBDJOH B NBOEBUPSZ SF quirement on all councils to tell prospective adopters about their entitlements. The government has also introduced the adoption passport, which sets out the rights and entitlements of adoptive parents, and the new online adoption maps, which allow potential adopters to find out more information about services in their area. Other new measures to protect the welfare of children, include: t $IBOHFT UP UIF MBX UP HJWF children in care the choice to stay with their foster families

until they turn 21 t " OFX MFHBM EVUZ PO TDIPPMT to support children at school with medical conditions better t .BLJOH ZPVOH DBSFST BOE parent carers’ rights to support from councils much clearer t 3FGPSNT UP DIJMESFO T SFTJ dential care to make sure homes are safe and secure, and to improve the quality of care vulnerable children receive. t " SFRVJSFNFOU PO BMM TUBUF funded schools - including academies - to provide free school lunches on request for all pupils in reception, year 1 and year 2. t "NFOENFOUT UP UIF MBX UP protect children in cars from the dangers of second-hand smoke. The act will also help people to better balance their work and home life with the following measures: 'SPN "QSJM NPUIFST fathers and adopters can opt to share parental leave around their child’s birth or placement. This gives families more choice over taking leave in the first year - dads and mothers’ partners can

take up to a year, or parents can take several months at the same time. t 1SPTQFDUJWF GBUIFST PS B mother’s partner can take time off to attend up to 2 antenatal appointments. t "EPQUJPO MFBWF BOE QBZ XJMM reflect entitlements available UP CJSUI QBSFOUT GSPN "QSJM OP RVBMJGZJOH QFSJPE for leave, enhanced pay to 90 per cent of salary for the first 6 weeks; and time off to attend introductory appointments. Intended parents

in surrogacy and ‘foster to adopt’ arrangements will also qualify for adoption leave and pay. t &YUFOEJOH UIF SJHIU UP SF RVFTU n FYJCMF XPSLJOH UP BMM employees from 30 June 2014. Jenny Willott, Employment Relations Minister, said: Current workplace arrangements have not kept up with the times. The Children and 'BNJMJFT "DU XJMM CSJOH UIF XBZ new parents balance their working and home lives into

the 21st century. By enabling any employee to SFRVFTU UP XPSL n FYJCMZ XF want to remove any cultural BTTVNQUJPO UIBU n FYJCMF XPSL ing is only for women, or just for parents and carers. We want these reforms to bring about a culture change in Britain’s workplaces, allowing everyone to better balance work with their personal life in the way that works for them. By the summer the majority of councils will have virtual schools heads in post helping improve educational outcomes for children in care.

5IJOLJOH BCPVU BEPQUJOH Have you got what it takes to transform a child’s life? TACT welcomes adopters from diverse backgrounds living in London (within the M25 radius). We are particularly keen to hear from black and minority ethnic adopters and those able to consider large sibling groups.

Benefits of adopting with TACT: t $IJME GPDVTTFE DIBSJUZ t )JHI MFWFM PG TVQQPSU t 0OHPJOH USBJOJOH t 5IFSBQFVUJD TFSWJDFT t 3FHVMBS BDUJWJUZ FWFOUT For more information: 5 & BEPQUJPOEVUZ!UBDUDBSF PSH VL

UBDUDBSF PSH VL Registered charity numbers: England & Wales 1018963. Scotland SC 039052.


19| THE VOICE JULY 31 - AUGUST 6, 2014

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ADOPTION

FAMILY MATTERS

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Rishi (4) and Noor (3)

Sutton Family Finder

3JTIJ BOE /PPS BSF NBUFSOBM IBMG TJCMJOHT XIP IBWF been with their foster carers since March 2013. This is their first placement since birth parents were VOBCMF UP DBSF GPS UIFN 3JTIJ FTQFDJBMMZ IBT witnessed domestic violence at home and poor care from his parents. This has resulted in delay in his speech and development. 8IFO UIFZ BSF BQBSU /PPS XJMM BTLFE GPS 3JTIJ CVU 3JTIJ POMZ BTL BCPVU UIFJS NBMF GPTUFS DBSFS 5IFZ EP support and rely on each other. Noor is very good

BU TIBSJOH 3JTIJ m OET JU IBSE UP TIBSF FTQFDJBMMZ JG JU is something that he likes. /PPS BOE 3JTIJ IBWF CFFO PO IPMJEBZT UP .POBDP BOE &HZQU 5IFZ FOKPZFE UIFJS BFSPQMBOF FYQFSJ ence and eating out in restaurants, eating everything using their knife and fork. 5IFJS GPTUFS DBSFST EFTDSJCF 3JTIJ BOE /PPS BT UIF most challenging but definitely the most rewarding children they have had since they began fostering several years ago.

Noor

Rishi

Ethnicity: .JYFE $BSJCCFBO XIJUF $IJOFTF BOE 4SJ -BOLBO Family needed: " OVSUVSJOH UXP QBSFOU BEPQUJWF GBNJMZ XIP DBO SFn FDU PS BDUJWFMZ EFWFMPQ 3JTIJ BOE /PPS T ethnic and cultural identity. Contact: Indirect contact is envisaged with their birth family Legal status: 1MBDFNFOU 0SEFS BOE $BSF 0SEFS Support: Includes possible adoption financial support 1SFGFSSFE BSFB GPS QMBDFNFOU "OZ JO UIF 6, *G ZPV IBWF GBNJMZ UIBU DPVME NFFU UIF OFFET PG 3JTIJ BOE /PPS QMFBTF DPOUBDU 1BVMFUUF 'BDFZ Tel: 020 8770 4016 | Email: paulette.facey@sutton.gov.uk

Rishi is a happy-natured, delightful child who enjoys receiving positive attention from the BEVMUT JO IJT MJGF )F IBT B CFBNJOH TNJMF BOE B DIFFLZ TFOTF PG IVNPVS 3JTIJ JT B TIZ BOE quiet child taking time to get to know people and seeking assurance from his foster carers. )F HFUT B MPU PG DPOm EFODF GSPN IJT TJTUFS /PPS 3JTIJ JT BGGFDUJPOBUF BOE PGUFO TFFLT DPNGPSU GSPN IJT DBSFS 3JTIJ JHOPSFT UIF GBNJMZ DBU CVU JT UFSSJm FE PG EPHT BOE TVEEFO MPVE OPJTFT 3JTIJ IBT TQFFDI BOE MBOHVBHF EFMBZ CVU IBT NBEF B WBTU JNQSPWFNFOU TJODF CFJOH JO IJT GPTUFS QMBDFNFOU 3JTIJ DBO UBML JO TIPSU TFOUFODFT BOE IBWF B DPOWFSTBUJPO )F m OET DIBOHFT EJGm DVMU UP CFHJO XJUI TP XJMM OFFE B QMBOOFE USBOTJUJPO 3JTIJ BUUFOET NBJOTUSFBN TDIPPM BOE is now writing letters and enjoying it but has a short attention span. He struggled at school for the first month but with one-to-one support, he has made good progress. He also attends a HSPVQ o 4VQQPSUJOH $IJMESFO XJUI 4QFFDI %FMBZ )F IBT NBEF TMPX CVU EFm OJUF JNQSPWFNFOU JO MPUT PG BSFBT 3JTIJ T TPDJBM JOUFSBDUJPO IBT JNQSPWFE CPUI BU TDIPPM BOE BU IPNF 3JTIJ XJMM OFFE TVQQPSU BOE VOEFSTUBOEJOH BSPVOE IJT MFBSOJOH BOE EFWFMPQNFOU XJUI m SN CVU kind boundaries. 3JTIJ MJLFT IJT UPZ SPDLFUT BFSPQMBOFT DBST QMBZJOH JO UIF HBSEFO BOE HPJOH UP UIF DJOFNB

Noor as she is known, is a happy and outgoing child, she is very sociable and will initiate friendly interactions with others. Noor loves pre-school, soft play, being outdoors and playing with friends. Noor enjoys going to the cinema. /PPS JT B UZQJDBMMZ HJSMZ HJSM FOKPZJOH BMM UIJOHT QJOL BOE XFBSJOH OBJM WBSOJTI 4IF BMTP MJLFT playing pretend games. Noor likes the family cat but is still scared of the family dog. Noor occasionally has tantrums when she is unhappy with something or if she is tired. 4IF JT WFSZ JOEFQFOEFOU TPDJBCMF BOE MJLBCMF )FS DBSFST BSF BCMF UP UBLF IFS FWFSZXIFSF BT she is friendly and never causes any problems. 4IF IBT B HPPE BUUBDINFOU XJUI IFS DBSFST BOE UIFJS BEVMU DIJMESFO BOE QMBZT WFSZ XFMM XJUI babies, her peers, teenagers and adults alike. /PPS BUUFOET QSF TDIPPM NPSOJOHT B XFFL TXJNNJOH BOE TPGU QMBZ PODF B XFFL BOE TIF loves shopping. /PPS IBT BNB[JOH WPDBCVMBSZ TIF JT BCMF UP QMBZ IBQQJMZ XJUI IFS UPZT BOE IFS J1BE BOE TIF loves bags and putting things into bags.

ADOPTION

Sutton Family Finder

Caitlin (8) and Cameron (5)

Cameron

Caitlin

Meet Caitlin (8) and Cameron UIFZ are very close and would like to be adopted together into their forever families. The children are very sociable and are popular amongst their peers. They require caring adopters who will help them to understand their past and help them to continue to thrive as they have done with their current carers. The children are white British, as are their current carers who they have a good attachment with. THEIR FOSTER CARERS SAID THE FOLLOWING: “Caitlin enjoys playing outside and doing fun activities like riding her scooter, playing on the USBNQPMJOF BOE HPJOH UP UIF QBSL 4IF MPWFT HP ing on holiday with us. Caitlin loves playing with her brother Cameron. Caitlin also enjoys going UP #BEHFST FWFSZ XFFL 4U +PIOT "NCVMBODF Caitlin tends to play with children younger UIBO IFS 4IF JT OPX BCMF UP KPJO JO XJUI PUIFS children and will now play with other children wherever we go. Caitlin enjoys watching carUPPOT PS B %7% $BJUMJO DBO CF B MJUUMF CPTTZ UP her brother at times. Cameron makes friends with other children easily wherever we go. Cameron loves dancing and playing football. He is very loving and

FOKPZT UP DVEEMF VQ BOE XBUDI 57 XJUI ZPV $BNFSPO MJLFT UP XBUDI DBSUPPOT PS B %7% Cameron is very caring he would offer to share his sweets. He is doing well at school and meeting his targets. Cameron is willing to try new things like new foods and activities.� Caitlin is progressing well at school and is perGPSNJOH UP FYQFDUFE MFWFMT BDBEFNJDBMMZ $BJUMJO MJLFT UP DVEEMF VQ UP XBUDI 57 $BJUMJO OFFET encouragement to persevere with new things or work that she finds a little tricky. Cameron is a fun, energetic boy who loves to play outside on the trampoline or riding his scooter or go kart. He loves playing with his sister Caitlin. Contact post adoption: $POUBDU XJMM CF JOEJSFDU UXJDF QFS ZFBS WJB -FUUFS #PY CJSUI QBSFOUT *OEJSFDU DPOUBDU XJUI UIFJS maternal grandmother. "MM FORVJSJFT NVTU CF PVUTJEF PG UIF 4VUUPO BOE Croydon areas; there will be discussions about adoption allowance for the right adopters. If you are interested in finding out more about Caitlin & Cameron contact: 4IFSJGB "EFONPTVO PO 0208 770 4117 or sherifa.adenmosun@sutton.gov.uk

LEGAL STATUS: FULL CARE ORDER AND PLACEMENT ORDER GRANTED


20| THE VOICE JULY 31 - AUGUST 6, 2014

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ADOPTION

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Sutton Family Finder

Georgina (6) and Lily (5)

Lily

Georgina

Meet Georgina (6) and Lily UIFZ BSF WFSZ DMPTF BOE XPVME MJLF UP CF BEPQUFE together into their forever families. The girls are chatty and bubbly, they love to watch their favourite children’s programmes, dance and also play games or read books. The girls require caring adopters who will help them to understand their past and help them to continue to thrive as they have done with their current carers. The girls are white British, as their current carers. Both girls enjoy adult attention but also require boundaries, they enjoy good routines and are said to be doing very well in their infant schools. THEIR FOSTER CARERS SAID THE FOLLOWING: “Georgina is a real girly girl, she loves everything pink, dressing up, fairies and HPJOH TIPQQJOH 4IF FOKPZT IFMQJOH IFS DBSFST BOE MJLFT JU XIFO XF HP UP UIF TFB TJEF DJOFNB PS TIPQQJOH 4IF T BSUJTUJD BOE FOKPZT NBLJOH UIJOHT (FPSHJOB JT BO affectionate little girl who is very caring. Georgina is in the school choir and loves UBLJOH QBSU JO TDIPPM BDUJWJUJFT -JMZ JT B UPNCPZ HJSM XIP JT JORVJTJUJWF BOE GSJFOEMZ 4IF MPWFT -FHP BOE 4QJEFSNBO -JMMZ IBT TFUUMFE XFMM JOUP JOGBOU TDIPPM BOE FOKPZT USZJOH PVU OFX UIJOHT 4IF DBO CF TUSPOH XJMMFE BU UJNFT BOE UIFSFGPSF SFRVJSFT good boundaries. Being the younger of the two girls she likes to feel involved and not left out in activities. Both girls have healthy appetites; their two favourite foods are spaghetti Bolognese and also pancakes.� Contact post adoption: $POUBDU XJMM CF JOEJSFDU UXJDF QFS ZFBS WJB -FUUFS #PY CJSUI QBSFOUT %JSFDU DPOUBDU XJUI UIFJS PMEFS TJTUFS XIP JT BEPQUFE "MM FORVJSJFT NVTU CF PVUTJEF PG UIF 4VUUPO BOE $SPZEPO BSFBT UIFSF XJMM CF EJT cussions about adoption allowance for the right adopters. *G ZPV BSF JOUFSFTUFE JO m OEJOH PVU NPSF BCPVU (FPSHJOB BOE -JMZ QMFBTF DPOUBDU 4IFSJGB "EFONPTVO PO PS TIFSJGB BEFONPTVO!TVUUPO HPW VL

ADOPTION

Sutton Family Finder

Timothy (6) and Malachi (3)

Timothy

Meet Timothy (6) and Malachi (3), they are fun loving and active brothers who are looking forward to being adopted together into their forever families. They enjoy outdoor play and prefer this to watching the television. The boys have limited understanding of their current situation and therefore require caring adopters who will create a safe and open environment for them to develop and reach their full potential. The boys are of Caribbean descent and would require adopters who will CF BCMF UP QPTJUJWFMZ QSPNPUF BOE BGGPSE UIFN PQQPSUVOJUJFT UP FYQMPSF UIJT JEFOUJUZ They have thrived since being in foster care and have made good attachments with their foster family. THEIR FOSTER CARERS SAID THE FOLLOWING: “Timmy and Malachi have been with us for almost 2 years, Timmy was 4 and Malachi was 1. Both boys were very quiet, nervous and timid when they first BSSJWFE 7FSZ TMPXMZ UIFZ HBJOFE DPOm EFODF BOE USVTU BOE IBWF EFWFMPQFE JOUP very noisy, boisterous, loud, loving and active little boys. Both boys have a very strong attachment to each other and are happy in each others company. They can now swim without floats and can ride a two wheel bike very well. They love food and will eat most things, favourite foods would probably be fruit, pasta, curry and yogurts (with the obvious inclusion of ice cream and sweets). Both boys are very loving and demanding of attention. Malachi is developing normally and at 3 years old is very opinionated, he can be very cheeky and can show his temper if he doesn’t get his own way. Timmy has a more delayed development; he can get very frustrated and angry very quickly which is displayed by crying or acting out. Timmy has a squint in both eyes which need regular hospital check-ups; it does not however impact his vision, he also attends speech and language sessions, audiology and has input to strengthen his motor skills from an occupational UIFSBQJTU )F IBT CFFO SFDFOUMZ SFGFSSFE UP UIF MPPLFE BGUFS DIJMESFO T 1TZDIPMPHJTU to try to help him understand his current circumstances. The boys need an adoptive family who would be patient, tolerant have and have a good sense of humour with a good support network and have plenty of energy and love for the boys.�

Malachi

Contact post adoption: $POUBDU XJMM CF JOEJSFDU UXJDF QFS ZFBS WJB -FUUFS #PY CJSUI QBSFOUT "MM FORVJSJFT NVTU CF PVUTJEF PG UIF 4VUUPO BOE $SPZEPO BSFBT there will be discussions about adoption allowance for the right adopters. If you are interested in finding out more about Timothy and Malachi please contact: 4IFSJGB "EFONPTVO PO 0208 770 4117 or sherifa.adenmosun@sutton.gov.uk

LEGAL STATUS: FULL CARE ORDER AND PLACEMENT ORDER GRANTED


21| THE VOICE JULY 31 - AUGUST 6, 2014

ADOPTION

Sean

Sean (8) and Brihanna (4)

Sean: DoB: March 2006 (8 years old) Ethnicity: NJYFE XIJUF #SJUJTI CMBDL "GSJDBO

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Sutton Family Finder Sean and Brihanna have always lived together and have a good relationship although there is a natural level of sibling SJWBMSZ 4FBO MJLFT UP MPPL BGUFS IJT TJTUFS and will advocate for her and she looks to him for support. 4FBO IBT B DIFFLZ HSJO )F JT HFOFSBMMZ a happy boy but often focuses on negaUJWF FYQFSJFODFT SBUIFS UIBO UIF GVO POFT 4FBO JT WFSZ BDUJWF BOE JORVJTJUJWF XJUI B loving and caring personality, but can get upset quite easily. He shows signs of insecurity and often seeks reassurance and praise, especially if his sister has just been praised for something. 4FBO JT BDIJFWJOH XFMM BU TDIPPM FTQF cially in literacy. He is popular and plays with girls more as many of the boys are passionate about football and play all the time. 4FBO MPWFT NVTJD DPMPVSJOH ESBXJOH and making things, balls, cars and playing on the trampoline. He is interested in helicopters and fire engines and might like to be a fire fighter when he grows up. 4FBO DBO CF B GVTTZ FBUFS BOE BQ proaches all new vegetables with suspicion, but this summer started eating

strawberry’s and tomatoes for the first time. He likes home cooked food like shepherd’s pie or spaghetti bolognaise and roast dinners. Brihanna has a happy bubbly personality XJUI BO JOGFDUJPVT MBVHI 4IF JT WFSZ MPW ing and has formed good attachments XJUI IFS GPTUFS DBSFST 4IF MJLFT UP DVE dle, and will snuggle up close with her CSPUIFS 4FBO XIFO XBUDIJOH UFMFWJTJPO 4IF IBT B XJEF WPDBCVMBSZ GPS IFS BHF and will talk to trusted adults; however she is initially shy of speaking in front of strangers. Brihanna enjoys playing with dolls and prams as well as being in the garden on the slide and trampoline. Brihanna started nursery in January 2013 and has settled really well and didn’t NJOE CFJOH MFGU CZ IFS GPTUFS DBSFS 4IF loves meeting with her friends and playing with different toys.

Brihanna

FAMILY MATTERS

*G ZPV IBWF B QPUFOUJBM GBNJMZ GPS 4FBO and Brihanna please contact: Jennifer Walker Tel: Email: Jennifer.walker@sutton.gov.uk

.FFU 4FBO BOE #SJIBOOB IBMG CSPUIFS BOE TJTUFS

Could you be their forever family?

Brihanna: DoB: 4FQUFNCFS ZFBST PME

Ethnicity: NJYFE XIJUF #SJUJTI CMBDL "GSJDBO

FAMILY NEEDED: The children need an active family who can take them on outings to the theatre, the cinema, the park as well as organise out of school activities such as sports, arts and craft.

ADOPTION

Sutton Family Finder

Brooke (7) and Mercedes (4)

Mercedes

Brooke

Meet Brooke (7) and Mercedes (4), they are very close and would like to be adopted together into their forever families. Mercedes is known as 4BEJF 5IF DIJMESFO BSF WFSZ TPDJBCMF and are popular amongst their peers. They require caring adopters who will understand their past and help them build new attachments with them. The girls enjoy singing, playing outdoors and going on holidays with their foster carer and her family. The girls are white British, as are their current carers who they have a good attachment with. THEIR FOSTER CARERS SAID THE FOLLOWING: “Brooke is a very bright and articulate HJSM 4IF JT B WFSZ HJSMJF HJSM XIP UISJWFT on attention. Brooke loves art, singing and dancing and really enjoys the weekly dance classes she currently attends. Brooke responds well to clear boundaries and routines and has continued to make good progress at TDIPPM 4IF FBUT BOE TMFFQT XFMM BOE JT a pleasure to care for. 4BEJF JT B WFSZ CVCCMZ BOE FOFSHFUJD

little girl who responds well to very clear CPVOEBSJFT 4BEJF OFFET SPVUJOF BOE she continues to make good progress at school. she has become a popular NFNCFS PG UIF DMBTT 4BEJF FOKPZT nothing more than making people laugh; she enjoys singing, dancing and swimming but will join in a wide range PG BDUJWJUJFT 4BEJF JT JNQSPWJOH JO IFS delayed speech, she eats and sleeps well and is a pleasure to care for.�

Contact post adoption: Contact will be indirect twice per year WJB -FUUFS #PY CJSUI QBSFOUT 1MBOOFE direct contact with their brother who is adopted. "MM FORVJSJFT NVTU CF PVUTJEF PG UIF 4VUUPO BOE $SPZEPO BSFBT UIFSF XJMM CF discussions about adoption allowance for the right adopters. If you are interested in finding out more about Brooke & Mercedes contact: 4IFSJGB "EFONPTVO PO 0208 770 4117 or sherifa.adenmosun@sutton.gov.

LEGAL STATUS: FULL CARE ORDER AND PLACEMENT ORDER GRANTED


22| THE VOICE JULY 31 - AUGUST 6, 2014

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EVERY CHILD DESERVES A LOVING HOME BAAF UK’s leading adopting and fostering membership association takes you through the adoption process in 10 STEPS

1. EXPRESS YOUR INTEREST If you are just thinking or definitely considering adoption contact your local authority PS B WPMVOUBSZ BEPQUJPO BHFODZ "MM BHFODJFT have to work to agreed standards and are inspected regularly. 2. PREPARING TO ADOPT You may be asked to complete a form and invited to an information event where you can talk to social workers and adopters, or perhaps have an informal 1:1 meeting. You can then decide whether you want to SFHJTUFS ZPVS JOUFSFTU JO HPJOH GVSUIFS "U this stage you are selecting an agency you trust to take you through the assessment process. In England there’s a two stage process. 4UBHF 0OF DPWFST UIF CBTJDT :PV XJMM CF asked to supply references and will agree for medical and other checks to take place. :PV EPO U OFFE UP CF QFSGFDU UIPVHI /FYU you will be invited to attend a preparation group along with other prospective adopters to give you an insight into what adoption means today, learning more about the needs of the children waiting to be BEPQUFE *U XJMM IFMQ ZPV FYQMPSF XIBU ZPV are able to offer and whether you wish to DPNNJU UP UIF OFYU TUBHF "U UIF FOE PG 4UBHF 0OF UIF BHFODZ XJMM confirm that you’ve passed the checks and JOWJUF ZPV UP TUBSU 4UBHF 5XP 4UBHF 0OF should take no more than two months, but you may want to set the pace and take

more time to think things through, which is fine. *O 4DPUMBOE BOE 8BMFT UIJT NJHIU CF FYQSFTTFE B CJU EJGGFSFOUMZ CVU UIFSF BSF timescales and standards to ensure you have all the information you need from the outset, you have the opportunity to attend a preparation group and you know how to complete an application. The same goes GPS /PSUIFSO *SFMBOE FYDFQU UJNFTDBMFT aren’t prescribed.

3. YOU ARE ASSESSED The formal assessment process is required by law and carried out by a social worker. It is sometimes referred to as a home study. The assessing social worker will visit you at home and you will talk through why you want to adopt, the kind of child you would best be able to care for and your overall suitability. You will also be invited to attend more detailed training to prepare you for adoption. In &OHMBOE UIJT JT LOPXO BT 4UBHF 5XP BOE ZPV DBO FYQFDU JU UP UBLF BSPVOE GPVS NPOUIT 4. GOING TO PANEL Your social worker writes up a report for presentation to an adoption panel. You will CF JOWJUFE UP BUUFOE 3FNFNCFS UIBU NPTU people who go to panel are approved! The panel makes the recommendation, but it will be the agency that approves you. TURN TO PAGE 23

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23| THE VOICE JULY 31 - AUGUST 6, 2014

FAMILY MATTERS

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DISPELLING THE MYTHS AROUND ADOPTION

I

t is a sad fact when children are unable to live with their birth family and who, because of neglect, abuse or because their parents DBOOPU DPQF HP JOUP QVCMJD DBSF "EPQUJPO is one of the best ways of giving these children a family for life. -FBEJOH UIF XBZ JO CSJOHJOH BXBSFOFTT UP UIJT GBDU JT UIF #SJUJTI "TTPDJBUJPO GPS "EPQUJPO BOE 'PTUFSJOH #""' XIJDI CFMJFWF QBTTJPOBUFMZ JO the importance of families as children do best in life if they have a secure and loving family of their own – a family who will help them feel confident and encourage them to develop a positive identity.

"DDPSEJOH UP UIF #""' PWFS DIJMESFO BDSPTT UIF 6, BSF DVSSFOUMZ JO OFFE PG BEPQUJPO and yet there is a desperate shortage of adopters. In particular, children from some black and ethnic minority communities often have to wait longer for families to provide permanent homes - the majority of these children are over five years old and boys are particularly over represented as older children in the care system. " SFDFOU #""' SFMFBTF IJHIMJHIUT UIF NBOZ misconceptions surrounding the adoption QSPDFTT 4PNF QFPQMF DPOTJEFS BEPQUJPO CVU never look into it further, convinced they will be ruled out due to the many myths surrounding

XIP DBO BOE DBOOPU BEPQU 4PNF QFPQMF TUJMM don’t realise that being disabled does not automatically rule you out. Other misconceptions that persist include isTVFT BSPVOE BHF NBSJUBM TUBUVT TFYVBM PSJFO tation and income. But in reality, you don’t need to be under 40– there is no upper age limit; you DBO BEPQU JG ZPV BSF TJOHMF PS JO B TBNF TFY relationship; you don’t need to own your own home or be wealthy, and issues such as being overweight will not automatically rule you out. "T MPOH BT ZPV BSF PWFS BOE EP OPU IBWF B criminal conviction for certain crimes, you can apply to be assessed as an adopter.

1FPQMF GSPN BMM FUIOJDJUJFT BOE DVMUVSFT BSF OFFEFE BOE XFMDPNFE BDDPSEJOH UP UIF #""' 1BSUJDVMBSMZ OFFEFE BSF QFPQMF XIP DPVME QBS ent children from some black and minority ethnic communities; a sibling group of children who need to stay together; older children or a DIJME XJUI EJTBCJMJUJFT PS DPNQMFY OFFET 5IFTF are the children who wait longer for a forever family. 5IF #""' SFMFBTF DPODMVEFT CZ OPUJOH UIBU adoption is a lifelong commitment. It’s not always easy, but as many adoptive parents will tell you, it can be one of the most amazing and XPSUIXIJMF FYQFSJFODFT PG ZPVS MJGF

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 22 5. BEING LINKED WITH A CHILD "T TP NBOZ DIJMESFO BSF XBJUJOH BHFODJFT BSF FODPVSBHFE UP FY plore linking you to a child or children before final approval. If there doesn’t seem to be a good match locally, the net is spread wider UISPVHI &YDIBOHF %BZT "EPQUJPO "DUJWJUZ %BZT BOE OBUJPOBM GBNJMZ m OEJOH TFSWJDFT TVDI BT #""' T #F .Z 1BSFOU PS "EPQUJPO 6, T $IJMESFO 8IP 8BJU If you have been approved but not been matched after three NPOUIT ZPV TIPVME CF SFGFSSFE UP UIF "EPQUJPO 3FHJTUFS PG DIJM ESFO XBJUJOH BDSPTT &OHMBOE BOE 8BMFT 4DPUMBOE T "EPQUJPO 3FHJTUFS PS UIF "EPQUJPO 3FHJPOBM *OGPSNBUJPO 4ZTUFN JO /PSUI FSO *SFMBOE EFQFOEJOH PO XIFSF ZPV MJWF "TL ZPVS TPDJBM XPSLFS about this. 6. A MATCH IS MADE Once the link is made, you will be given more information about the child or children, including their family background, a history of their early years, why the child came into care, the child’s characteristics and any particular needs the child may have. When you have agreed the match, you will attend a matching panel, which will look at whether or not to recommend the match. In Northern Ireland prospective adopters don’t attend the matching panel otherwise it’s the same. Once again, the final approval will be given by your agency.. 7. MEETING THE CHILD You may have seen a video of your child, or even played together BU BO "EPQUJPO "DUJWJUZ %BZ 'PSNBM JOUSPEVDUJPOT NVTU XBJU UJMM UIF match has been approved. They are well planned by the social worker, yourself and the foster carer (assuming the child is in fosUFS DBSF :PV DBO FYQFDU UP WJTJU UIF GPTUFS DBSFS T IPVTF BOE QMBO outings, and the child will visit you at home, including overnight stays. Gradually, you will be getting to know each other and the child will move in as soon as you’re all ready. 8. MOVING IN "O FYDJUJOH BOE EBVOUJOH UJNF for all concerned! It doesn’t UBLF NVDI UP JNBHJOF UIF NJY PG FNPUJPOT UIJT DBO FWPLF Most importantly, it marks the beginning of your life together as a family. You are entitled to statutory adoption leave and pay, and will continue to be supported by your social worker. 9. MAKING THE ADOPTION LEGAL "GUFS B NJOJNVN PG UFO XFFLT you can apply to the courts for an adoption order. This is the final legal step. It means the child will be legally yours and can take your surname. 10. YOUR LIFE TOGETHER 1BSFOUJOH JT POF PG UIF NPTU SFwarding and most challenging KPCT JO MJGF 5IFSF BSF CPVOE UP CF VQT BOE EPXOT "EPQUJPO TVQ port is widely available to see you through, so please ask your agency when you need help.

SO VERY PROUD TO BE A FATHER!

NEED DONOR EGGS?

Michael Charles, 38 from London talks of his struggle to become a father and the pride he now has in his new daughter.

There is a marked decrease in women’s fertility after the age of 35, Michael explains, “I am so proud to be a fathertotoconceive my beautiful for princess Layla, my wife and and if you have been trying more than 12Patricia months I struggled with infertility issues for over 5 years and at times the pain was unbearable as I doubted that we no success then you must seek medical advice. wouldwith ever have a family of our own.� Like so many couples, Michael & Patricia entered in to marriage with high hopes for their future, they wanted a nice women home filled may with laughter to raise their children. But then came stumbling Some needand to happiness consider the use of donor eggs inthe order block – having children. The couple met at university in Leeds, they married in 2006, and spent the first two to achieve a pregnancy, however waiting lists in the UK can be as years of marriage working hard and focusing on their careers. Patricia, also now 38, decided when she was 32 that the time right to try for aifchild. long aswas 3 years and you need an Afro Caribbean egg there is no

time onmoon how long you ofcan wait.a father and the couple spent the first few months Michael was limit over the at the prospect becoming anticipating how much a child would bring to their lives and their relationship. But after 6 months, the excitement turned to anxiety, as month after month there was no sign of a pregnancy. Patricia consulted her But help iskeep at hand - Barbados Fertility Centre will be exhibiting GP and was told to trying. By the time Patricia turned 33, she knew something was wrong at and returned to her GP, who also decided that after a year of trying tests were needed to establish why the couple The Fertility Show at Olympia from Nov 2 to Nov 3 2013. Please come could not conceive. Everything was in good working order for Patricia and the Dr could see no reason why along and meet Dionne Holmes, IVF Donor/Recipient she wasn’t conceiving. However, the tests on Michael’s sperm showed that he hadCoordinator a very low sperm count and very low motility. The best course of action for the couple was to have In Vitro Fertilization (IVF). for more information on our EXCELLENT donor egg programme For more the work Barbados Centre please log on to: withinformation successonrates ofof72% andFertility no waiting list for treatment. www.barbadosivf.com or if you would like to speak specifically about the donor egg programme then email: Dionne Holmes, Donor/Recipient Coordinator – dholmes@barbadosivf.com

www.barbadosivf.com 001 246 435 7467 dholmes@barbadosivf.com

Organization Accredited by Joint Commission International


24| THE VOICE JULY 31 - AUGUST 6, 2014

FAMILY MATTERS

@thevoicenews

NOW IS THE PERFECT TIME There’s no doubt about it – adoption is a life-changing, emotional journey but with our help and advice, you could become the parent you have always wanted to be.

"

EPQUJPO /PSUI -POEPO BSF doing things differently, UIFZ SF TJY MPDBM BVUIPSJ ties; Barnet Camden, Enfield, Haringey, Hackney and Islington, who are working together in partnership to find families for the children waiting for the childhood they deserve. You don’t have UP MJWF JO /PSUI -POEPO UP BEPQU XJUI us, but you can live anywhere in or BSPVOE -POEPO 8F LOPX UIF DIJM dren waiting would welcome single parents or couples to guide them and give them the tools to be healthy, happy adults. 8F TUJMM OFFE GBNJMJFT UP BEPQU #MBDL BOE .JYFE )FSJUBHF children, siblings and children over four years old. 8F EPO U FYQFDU ZPV UP EFDJEF BCPVU BEPQUJPO

voicenewspaper

www.voice-online.co.uk

YOUR ADOPTION JOURNEY Contact the team and attend an information session † If we all agree to progress, you will be invited to attend some introductory training.

† We will help you to complete a workbook about your life experiences. † The next stage is an assessment with a dedicated social worker who ҕ QGV RXW PRUH DERXW \RX \RXU OLIH SDVW DQG SUHVHQW

† When your assessment is complete you will need to attend an Adoption Panel with your social worker.

† We will share details of children we think will help you become a family.

overnight but we are hosting a speDJBM JOGPSNBUJPO FWFOJOH BU 4UPLF Newington Town Hall, Church TUSFFU / +3 GSPN QN If you think you could be a parent through adoption, call to book your place on 0800 694 0101. We’ll have adopters there who have already built their family through adoption and they’ll give you open, honest answers to your questions to help you decide if adoption is right for you. Our friendly and knowledgeable team of workers will be on hand to discuss the process and let you know the sort of support that is available for you and your GBNJMZ +PJO "EPQUJPO /PSUI -POEPO PO 5IVSTEBZ "VHVTU – or if you have a friend or family member who would make a great adoptive parent, let them know about this event.

Live a life less ordinary

Adopt

Adoption is life changing. 5.30-8.00 pm Thursday 21 August

0800 694 0101

Come to our information evening at Stoke Newington Town Hall, Church Street, N16 OJR. Book a place today. We want to hear from you. Our team will help and support you through the process, every step of the way. Get in touch to find out more and to book a place at one of our information sessions.

www.adoptionnorthlondon.co.uk


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