A Very Misadventurous Vacation by Sarah Hill ’23 It was the middle of June on a hot summer’s day, and the Parker family was getting ready for their annual vacation. This year they decided to go to North Carolina, taking their family van as usual. The family made sure to pack everything they needed not only for the vacation, but also for the car ride, including snacks, drinks, and other things to keep them busy. The drive down there would be about 12 hours, which would be a battle in itself, considering three adults and two teenagers had to be stuck together for that long. To add to the chaos, the grandmother had separation anxiety from her beloved pet bird, Fred. The Parker family prayed that this road trip would go smoothly because then they would be able to truly relax at their destination. The first few hours of the trip went by quickly, as everyone was on their electronic devices except the driver, Mr. Parker. The radio was on the Grateful Dead channel, and Mr. Parker was swaying his head to the sounds of Jerry Garcia’s guitar solo. Everything was calm, that is until the grandmother asked, “where is Fred?” “Fred is at home with the other birds,” answered Mr. Parker calmly. “No,” said the grandmother, “I just saw him, where did he go?” The teenage son giggled, thinking his grandma was making up stories again. “Fred isn’t with us Grandma,” murmured the sassy teenage daughter. The grandmother was sure that she had just seen her yellow and green bird, but she eventually became quiet again, as she realized her family didn’t believe her. After some more driving, the family became very bored. The five of them ate all of their snacks and completed all of 44 | Spring 2022
the puzzles they brought for the trip. They had run out of activities to do and were desperate to get out of the car. The trip wasn’t even halfway over and the Parkers were already sick of being together. The grandmother tried to start conversations with her family, but they mostly ended up being about her bird. Due to this constant pestering, the rest of the family was quite exasperated. The teenage boy tried to lighten the mood, but even his attempts failed. Even with the upbeat sounds of the radio, the car always seemed to end up in silence. The grandmother couldn’t keep her mind off of her bird, while the rest of the family hoped their vacation would be much better than their frustrating car ride. After about five hours of driving, the family became hungry and stopped at a McDonald’s to stretch their legs. Mrs. Parker took the grandmother to the bathroom while Mr. Parker and the kids ordered food. “What do you think Grandma meant when she said she saw Fred?” the daughter asked her father. “She probably was just so worried about Fred that she thought she saw him in the car,” Mr. Parker stated dismissively. The family got their McDonald’s to go and went back on the road. The car’s mood instantly changed when “Playing in the Band” by the Grateful Dead came on the radio. The family was so overjoyed singing together that they almost forgot to eat their food. As the Parkers began to eat their meals, the son opened his bag. “Hey, who ate all my fries?” he said in a confused tone. Mrs. Parker looked at her son’s empty fry container and said, “That’s weird, you
