Eastside MamaMag Oct/Nov 2017

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EASTSIDE

mamaMAG Oct/Nov 2017

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spring has sprung You are now looking at the new and improved 40yo Sarah! Do I look different? Nah! I don’t really feel any different. I had an awesome party with all my nearest and dearest though and felt about twice that age the next day #toomanybubbles! It was a really special night having everyone I love in the same room. Mama even had the kids along for a few hours till cake time. Sent them home before speeches though, phew! And now it’s October. Um, really? How? It’s certainly been an exciting few months but boy have they flown. The big birthday party, a trip to the snow (complete with igloo building), my Yarra Trail feature launched (you can meet the other Trailblazers on page 12), my son took out the best and fairest for his U9 soccer team (proud mama) and the kids adopted a greyhound (thankfully at their Dad’s house so I’m off the hook on getting a dog for a while longer!). With only one more school term left and the weather warming more every week, Spring makes me so excited. The kids were only home with me for the first week of school holidays but there was much fun to be had. A trip to the show, movies, roller skating and play dates. This issue we are focusing on fashion and beauty and I’ve caught up with some fabulous ladies doing ace things in the fashion world. I met the delightful stylist to the stars Lana Wilkinson and her gorgeous kids, I spent a day with the fabulous Jenni from Styling Curvy. She is doing great stuff for women and their body confidence. Plus we also chatted to Felicia Palanco from Flor Dancewear. She is really shaking up the tween fashion market with her new active wear range. So I’m forty and fabulous. Fabulously single, but I’m ok with that for now. I’ve got some amazing friends in my life, a business that brings me more passion and fun than I could ever have imagined and I’m really beginning to believe that love will find me when I least expect it. And until then, I’m going shopping. Mama needs a new summer wardrobe. Love is just a word until someone comes along and gives it meaning.

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Local fun for everyone • Bayside • Eastside • Northside • Westside


Contents Permission to be yourself 6 Styling curvy confidence Parklife 8 Fawkner Park, South Yarra Dress remarkably 10 Dress how you want to feel Trailblazing 12 Meet two amazing women Queen of style 14 Taking to Lana Wilkinson Turn the page 16 Book picks from Story Mama Social media obsessed teen 18 How to deal with one We love a mother 20 Felicia Palanca, Flo Dancewear Nursery design tips 22 To inspire the imagination Mama can cook 24 Mr & Mrs Wilkinson’s new book Lovely locals 28 Exploring East Melbourne Mother’s guilt 30 Time to jump out of it Four weeks for you 35 Give to yourself Summer skin saviours 36 All the essentials Mindful shopping 40 Slow your fashion down The other mother 42 Stepmum Kelly Chandler Slip on your shades 44 Protection your child’s eyes Colour to WIN 45 WIN Despicable Me DVD packs Sleep tight 46 Don’t let the bed bugs bite MamaMag Oct/Nov 2017

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MamaMag® is published bi-monthly for the mums of Melbourne’s East by Grizzle Design Pty Ltd ABN: 26 042 138 550. PO Box 8018 Brighton East 3187 Phone: 1300 771 446 Email: info@mamamag.com.au www.mamamag.com.au | www.grizzledesign.com.au

10,000 copies per issue across Melbourne’s East including Stonnington, Boroondara, Yarra and Melbourne. 40,000 copies across all four areas: Bayside • Eastside • Northside • Westside Editor in Chief: Sarah Cavalier: sarah@mamamag.com.au Eastside Editor: Kara Wilson Advertising enquiries/Key Account Manager: Georgia Place: georgia@mamamag.com.au or download media kit from our website Want to write for us or have an article idea? submissions@mamamag.com.au The opinions expressed herein are not necessarily those of the publishing staff. Reproduction in whole or part is prohibited without permission of the publishers. Health related articles are designed to be informative and educational. They are not intended to provide specific medical advice or replace one-on-one advice from your health practitioner.

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PermIssIon to be yourself This is your summer, you know the one where you actually enjoy yourself and get involved in ALL the water fun and give no shits about what others think of you. It’s time to play with your kids ‘in’ the pool, taste the salt water ‘on’ your lips and love that body of yours ‘more’. It’s time for body confidence. Body confidence is something I have in bucket loads, but trust me it wasn’t always that way. Oh, sure people would say I’ve always ‘been confident’ but being ‘body confident’, well that took time. These days I’m passionate about helping women get in touch with their inner goddess (we all have one) and achieving positive body confidence. Body confidence to me is partly about letting go. Letting go of all the negative internal dialogue and poor habits from the past. Let them go and replace them with a positive internal dialogue bringing you ‘achievable positive daily change’ to create a life you love from the inside out. 6

It doesn’t happen overnight, but it will happen. Hey, isn’t that a shampoo ad? We are all on our own journey, some of us are winning at having fabulous body confidence, some of us are creating change and some are just plain stuck. We are all at different stages, and that’s ok. When I posted a pic of myself in a bikini all the ladies on the internet cheered. Kinda weird because I didn’t bring about world peace, but I get it. My photograph gave women everywhere of all ages, sizes and stages of life permission. Permission to just bloody be themselves, even on the beach. What is it with woman judging other women? If you’re the judgey type, STOP! If you are on the internet make the effort to encourage other women and while you are at it when you post a pic use the hashtags #yourbodyconfidence and #cossieconfidence so we can all cheer you too.


Meanwhile if you need more confidence on the beach this summer here’s a few tips…

By Jenni Eyles, Styling Curvy - Styling a vibrant life from the inside out

• Get a spray tan or try an ‘at home’ job

www.stylingcurvy.com

• Spoil yourself with a pedicure, shellac will last months

“Women, no matter their size, want on trend fashion that makes them feel special, included and that relates to their lifestyle. Yarra Trail Woman delivers on this which is why I was delighted to be a part of their Summer Trailblazer campaign” says Jenni. Woman summer 2017 is designed for everywoman across Australia, be inspired at www.yarratrail.com.au/woman

• If lippy makes you feel better then wear it, even on the beach • Invest in a quality cossie with power mesh panels and adjustable straps • Wear a rashie for sun protection and modesty • A sarong doubles as a skirt, dress or wrap • Buy yourself a special beach towel and bag • Try colour or print (or both) in your cossie • Give less fucks! People aren’t staring so live your life now! How’s your body confidence? Is it better than it was 6 months ago? How do you think you will be in 6 months time?

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Parklife fawkner park, south yarra If you have kids who love to climb on everything, or just need a decent run around, this park is a must. The tree-lined park itself is beautifully landscaped and has paths crisscrossing everywhere, allowing easy pram and scooter access to the playgrounds. There are actually three playgrounds – one is quite close to busy Toorak Rd (where you’ll be able to get your caffeine fix), and is suited to the school-aged kids. Unfenced but nestled in the middle of a vast open green space, the other two playgrounds sit side by side and have something for every age group and ability. The play structures are simple and maybe a little dated compared with a lot of the new adventure playgrounds, but they are extremely

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popular on the weekends. The neighbouring school uses it during recess and lunch times, so if you have very little ones, it’s best to go outside of those times or expect an onslaught of excited and energetic big kids. There’s a large circular sandpit so bring your trucks and buckets. There are four swings, various slides and ladders, monkey bars and walkways, a three-person motorcycle springer, sea-saws, and a large climbing web. There are a good number of park benches, a BBQ space, picnic tables, water taps, and the public toilets are a short walk away. For the sports-mad kids, there’s a basketball court, and plenty of grass to set up a game of soccer. Something for the whole family!


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DRESS REMARKABLY There are times when I am at least 165 world’s away from feeling remarkable. Like after every baby I’ve ever had, or when I’m sad, or stressed. Or when I’m sleep deprived because my 4 year-old has Disney witch dreams, and my 10 year-old has growing pains, and my 12 year-old hears noises in the middle of the night because of those dang possums (repeatedly!) having allnight dinner parties in my roof.

Project Runway judge, Nina Garcia, sums this up to perfection in The Little Black Book of Style: ‘This instant language is much smarter than it gets credit for at times. They are just clothes, shoes, and bags, you could say. And people do say it, day after day. But I think they are more than clothes, shoes, and bags. They are a large part of a woman’s character and tell us a bit of her story without saying a word.’

Not feeling so remarkable then?

I used to play these little games back in fashion school, where I would challenge myself each morning to mix as many remarkable pieces together as possible (there is a LOT of pressure to look never-endingly fabulous in fashion school!). I remembered back to that time, and thought ‘I should start doing the same’. Well, sort of. Instead, I became very deliberate about choosing ONE remarkable piece to wear each morning (rather than my fashion school standard of 36 pieces all at once - I was a true fashionista back then - Aka: hot-mess - don’t recommend it!).

But we all know that such an enormous part of being an ambitious mum is about putting a spotlight on the remarkable. Right? Being unique. Being unforgettable. Being that one-ina-trillion. And so we try to create a remarkable brand, a remarkable product, remarkable content.

But, what about us? What makes us remarkable? Some time ago it hit me like a tonne-of-bricks that whenever I felt unremarkable on the inside, I became equally unremarkable on the outside. Do you know what I mean? It was as if the way I wore my clothes became a bright mirror with blazing lights focussed only on my very uninspired, rather downright depressing feelings. Like I was telling the whole-wide-world my secret story of exhaustion, uncreativity, and sadness (not a great look for a sparkly, go-getting, want-to-change-the-world style entrepreneur).

Feeling, blah! Dressing, blah! That’s just how it was for a bit. Until this one wonderful day (after too many terrible days) – I decided I wanted to tell a different story. I decided to stop dressing how I felt, and start dressing how I wanted to feel. And I decided to dress like the woman I was working hard to become, even though I hadn’t become her yet. I decided to dress remarkably again.

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Just ONE remarkable piece, each time I walk out the door, is all it takes for me to feel beautiful, confident, and in control… as well as giving me a zillion compliments in the process (wink!). Because just ONE remarkable piece tricks people into thinking I am waaaaaaay more fabulous than I really am. Cheeky. Seriously. Try it. Each morning, when you are dressing your gorgeous-on-the-inside, soon-to-be-gorgeouson-the-outside self for the day, think of one specifically selected piece you could add to your outfit to transform it into something remarkable. And, when I say ‘remarkable’, what I mean is: worthy of remarking upon. Now, I don’t want you thinking to yourself that you need to be wearing some out-ofthis-world, outrageously gorgeous, completely WOW! outfit every time you scurry up to the corner store to grab yourself some Nutella.


No. Not so. What I am saying is – if you are popping out in a simple t-shirt and jeans, you can elevate your entire look to remarkable, by adding a little something with a pop of colour, a pattern, a touch of sparkle, a bit of leopardprint, or by simply draping yourself in a fulllength fur coat (kidding!). But go a little crazy. Be a touch dramatic. Stand-out. Have fun! And, THEN look for other women doing the same! I love this little tidbit in the book Amazinger Face where Zoe Foster Blake says: “And so I urge you: if you see a woman with a terrific smile, or great skin, or nice hair, or shoes or frock, say something! There is a very good chance that she put in some extra effort, which is precisely why you noticed whatever it was you noticed, so give her a verbal high-five, why don’t you? You’ll feel good, she’ll feel wonderful, and somewhere out there a pixie will finally be granted her golden wings.”

Throw compliments around like confetti! Celebrate beauty. Encourage creativity. “Because who doesn’t want a pixie to be granted her magical golden wings? By Clarissa Grace, online personal stylist, confidence coach and founder of www.WakingUpInParis.com. Clarissa helps ambitious mums embrace their bodies, believe in their beauty and transform themselves through the power of personal style. She is professionally trained in fashion design, costume design, and haute couture through The Paris American Academy, and created hundreds of couture wedding gowns for brides under her self named label.

ONE remarkable piece tricks people into thinking I am way more fabulous than I really am. Cheeky. Seriously. Try it.

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TraIlblazIng I was thrilled to be a part of the current Yarra Trail ‘trailblazers’ campaign where they featured myself and two other awesome woman, celebrating what we do best. Jenni and Georgia were both inspiring in their own rights and here I share with you part of their amazing business and life journeys. x Sarah

Meet Trailblazer Jenni Eyles of Styling Curvy. My job is to help women live a ridiculously awesome life, from the inside out. And I do this through personal styling and body image, and just talking about everyday life that women can relate to. I also run workshops and do public speaking. Almost five years ago, I received a cancer diagnosis that turned my world upside down. And I decided that I wanted to make my life and working life matter. I knew I couldn’t go back and do the regular work that I used to do in my old life. But I still had a need to connect with women and to tell my story and to be creative with personal styling, which is my history. So, I started talking online through my website. I love a chat, and women responded. I tried to be as relatable as I could be, as honest, authentic, and fill a need, which was talking about body confidence, body image and personal styling. Before cancer, I was like many other women. I was on the treadmill of work, children, schedules, all the rest of it. When I got cancer, I was 136 kilos and I couldn’t move. Literally every part of my body would seize up, I had loads of health issues. I went through cancer treatment and both my breasts were removed and eventually rebuilt. 12

It was very hard for my children, and it’s been hard for me as my mum. Because in a way, I brought that to their life and changed their outcome. I don’t know what their outcome would have been if cancer hadn’t invaded our lives. Who’s to say? I always cry when I talk about my kids because it messed one of my kids up. And I don’t often talk about that ... I never really write about it publicly. But I think it’s important for people to know that children, no matter what their age, especially in the teenage years, it’s really hard. They’re so much more aware and they’ve got so much angst and self-discovery that they’re trying to do anyway, and then all of a sudden, that’s thrown into the mix and it can really mess them up. I can see some upside in how they live their lives now. And I’m extremely proud. I see them resign from jobs that aren’t making them happy. And probably five years ago I would have had a heart attack about that because it’s like, no, you don’t resign from a job sort of thing. But I think, more power to you, because they understand that what the life they’re living right now matters, not the title that they hold or status in society. They’re making themselves happy. This journey is what helped me start Styling Curvy. It opened up this amazing community where I can connect with women and change lives. I love my Styling Curvy community, they are supportive and uplifting. I think innately


women want to support other women, and Styling Curvy is all about that. I’m an everyday mum from the burbs and there’s no BS. I’m just doing my thing, and they can totally relate. www.stylingcurvy.com

“I believe cancer was a gift for me, beca use it has completely changed how I thi nk about life. I don’t sweat the small stuff anymore.”

Meet Trailblazer Georgia Harding of Well Nourished. I’ve been a naturopath for 20 years now and for me it’s always been about giving. I love to give. But I wanted to reach more people than just those who came to see me in private practice. So, I started Well Nourished, a blog where I could share my passion for practical health advice, delicious recipes and try to help as many people as I could. I had been running my own private practise and caring for our two children, but it was a lot to juggle. I decided to become a full-time mum and found myself at a crossroad as to where I wanted to be professionally. I wanted something that I could enjoy and give back too. So developing Well Nourished seemed like the perfect place to do exactly that.

get families to eat well. Sure, I don’t make a living like I used to as a naturopath, but I have a lot more job satisfaction. Well Nourished has truly gone from strength to strength. I’ve written recipes for jamieoliver.com and was selected as one of the ten ambassadors worldwide for Jamie’s Food Revolution. He’s a hero of mine so it’s a dream come true for me. I’ve also created recipes for Wellbeing’s Eat Well Magazine, and now here I am as a Yarra Trail Trailblazer! It’s been such an amazing experience. I think the biggest barrier for most people, in making healthy choices, is just confusion. There’s so much information out there about what you should and shouldn’t eat. Being healthy is all about getting in the kitchen, cooking food, enjoying it, sharing it with friends and family. It doesn’t need to be complicated. Good food should be simple. I’m a huge fan of butter. I think it just adds so much flavour and diversity. I don’t advocate any particular style of eating. I’m very much about bio-individuality, which is eating to suit your own body and your own taste as well. For that reason, I try to make my recipes quite versatile. I cater for lots of food intolerances and I’ll always give options; dairy free, gluten free, egg free, nut free, etcetera. Well Nourished is quite a versatile place. It’s fad free, real food and most of all it’s delicious. wellnourished.com.au Check out the complete Yarra Trail Summer range at www.yarratrail.com.au g “Healthy eatin style, habits are a life g tin Ea . et di a not life.” well is a way of

Writing a blog was completely different to anything I had ever done. I’d never been on Facebook, never used Instagram, and here I was, totally out of my comfort zone, creating a website from scratch. I really threw myself in the deep end! For me, it’s never been about money. It’s always been about sharing my passion and trying to 13


QUEEN of style Lana Wilkinson is best know as a celebrity stylist, fashion influencer and mum to two gorgeous girls. Lana has dressed some of the most well-known faces in our media landscape including Bec Judd, Megan Gale, Ashley Hart, Samantha Wills, DJ Havana Brown, Zoe FosterBlake, Elyse Knowles, Scherri Lee Biggs and Nadia Bartel. Normally preparing other women for the spotlight, Lana recently collaborated with online children’s boutique LM Bambini where she, and her daughters Ava (three) and Elle (one), featured in their latest campaign. LM Bambini’s collection features high end designers including Dolce & Gabbana, Kenzo, Stella McCartney and Hucklebones London, Diesel and Fendi.

What were you doing prior to becoming a celebrity and fashion stylist? I worked in brand, PR and retail marketing for seven years and was a project marketing manager. It was co-workers and friends seeking style advice that got me into styling early on. In 2009, I started to do a lot of test shoots. I never assisted anyone as I’d previously managed the fashion campaigns for the companies I worked for. It was blood sweat and tears that got me to where I am today.

What are your mama style essentials for this Summer? A good blazer with a tee or shirt, a great pair of jeans and sneakers or loafers so that I look “DONE”

What are your favourite brands for kids at the moment? LM Bambini is my go to for all things fashion for my girls. They stock amazing brands like Kenzo, Stella McCartney, Hucklebones London and even the mini Sophia Webster shoes! They are my favs. 14

Are there any stand out women that you have loved dressing and working with? I love working with all women that want to feel good about themselves and choose fashion as a way to express themselves. Whether it’s a celebrity or a personal client or brand, my job is to bring a feeling or a vision to life. I believe when you achieve that, the work then speaks for itself.

What has been your biggest highlight in your career so far? I’ve been fortunate to have had so many exciting clients and brands to work with. But a huge pinch me moment was definitely working with Rachel Zoe, when she was in Australia for The Style Icons for Chadstone- The Fashion Capital. She is my hero and working with her and her team, styling her looks was truly an experience I’ll remember forever. I felt like, if I stopped styling today I would be okay because that experience was amazing.

How do you juggle work life with home life? The struggle is real as is the juggle; I think this is the case for any parent. Balance is something I find really hard to achieve and the one thing I beat myself up about. Ultimately in a perfect world you could be a gun in all areas of your life, but I’m trying to just control the controllable. I have an amazing support in my husband Liam whose constant encouragement means more than I could ever say. He is such a hands on dad to our daughters and my mum Annette is truly my best friend.

When you’re not working you are… Hanging out at the park with my two girls Ava and Elle and my husband Liam.


What was your most exciting achievement this year?

What’s your funniest or most embarrassing parenting story?

Being the face of the Spring/Summer children LM Bambini campaign with my daughters. The images will be photographs I will cherish forever and for my family, they were so excited. Often my work takes me away from my family, so to involve them in my work was so special. From a career point of view, it felt empowering that Natalia of LM Bambini entrusted myself and my girls to be a part of her company’s brand story. A privilege I don’t take lightly.

There are too many to recall. With two daughters there is a lot of emotion in our household. My kids bring me undone all the time. I think given the industry I work in, it also keeps me grounded. I love them to death and whether they are repeating things I say (which is often, and almost always inappropriate!) or screaming in public, all kids should be allowed to be kids. I’ll just remind myself of that the next time one of them throws a tantrum!

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turn the page Melbourne Word by Word Take a meander through Melbourne’s iconic landmarks and hidden gems and soak up the distinct Melbourne atmosphere, word by word. This book is just so Melbourne. With a single word to a page it is a celebration of trams and Brighton bathing boxes and includes landmarks like Puffing Billy, Flinders Street Station, the Skipping Vinegar Girl, the Shrine and even a couple of pages featuring the footy. It is a simple read - perfect for kids learning to read or for reading aloud to younger kids. We highly recommend it for ages 2-6. It will tug at the heart strings of those that call Melbourne home.

Fancy Nancy and the Butterfly Birthday Nancy thinks butterflies are simply exquisite. And that is why she can’t wait to go to her friend Bree’s Butterfly Birthday! It’s going to be the fanciest party ever! But when Nancy finds out she can’t go because her grandparents’ fiftieth anniversary party is the same day, she is furious! How will she overcome this disappointment? In a glorious twist everybody’s favourite fancy girl gets a sparkling lesson in fancy from her own grandparents. Maybe being fancy runs in the family after all! This is a cute story, full of Fancy Nancy fun and big fancy words. It suitably deals with a child missing out on a party for an important family occasion. If you have a child into glitter, butterflies, and sparkly things they will love Fancy Nancy. Recommended for ages 4-7.

Pig the Star Aaron Blabey Pig just LOVES attention. In fact, he’s a great big SHOW-OFF. But when another star appears at the photo shoot, Pig doesn’t like it. No Pig doesn’t like it at all. In this story Pig is off to the pet photographer. He and Trevor get to wear costumes and everything! Pig even does his own little rap tune. When he gets angry that Trevor seems to actually be the star of the shoot, he gets his usual comeuppance. Told in rollicking rhyme with a touch of slap stick humour (Pig always ends up in bandages!) This is a great fun read aloud and a good lesson in sharing the spotlight. We highly recommend for ages 3-8.

Home in the Rain by Bob Graham Francie’s going to have a new baby sister very soon. But what will her name be? Francie has so many ideas! On a long drive home from Grandma’s house with Mum, in the pouring rain, maybe they’ll find one that’s just right. This Children’s Book Council of Australia Picture Book of the Year is recommended for ages 3-8. The story explores how different animals and people experience the rain. Her dad is working far out to sea and has been gone for 3 weeks now. This is a gentle and heart-warming story about a journey, and deciding on a name for the soon to arrive baby sister.

Debbie Hatswell is the Founder and Director of Story Mama. Story Mama is an online children’s bookstore featuring a huge range of carefully curated, parent recommended, high quality books for children ages 0-9. You can shop online by age, by interest, by award winners or even by milestone. Buy these titles online or find out more at www.storymama.com.au 16 16


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How to Deal wIth a SocIal MedIa Obsessed Teen It is rare that I meet a girl who doesn’t have a phone in her hand. She usually has at least one eye on her online status while she’s talking to me. Some may find this rude, but I personally don’t. I understand why. If teenagers aren’t online they don’t exist, so they stay connected 24/7. They don’t want to be invisible, just in case they miss out. Our daughters have a love - hate relationship with their phones. They can’t live happily with them but they also can’t live without them. They admit to being addicted. In fact, the average teenage girl sends 4050 texts per month . That’s more than six texts per waking hour! It’s also why they need us (rather than want us) involved in their online world. Without us it’s highly possible they could lose their way. Mums tell me that although their daughters may not be sending nude images or talking to paedophiles, they are constantly distracted and disengaged. They aren’t paying enough time to their schoolwork, family time or dayto-day jobs. It’s like this generation is in a relationship with their phones instead of being in relationship with the people who love them. They are not present in their actual lives. Dealing with a social media obsessed teen is tricky. Let’s face it, there are no magic solutions to social media. It’s a real battle for every family. Here are my top six strategies which I find critical for parents of teens under the age of 15 to focus on. If you do nothing else when it comes to social media, these are a must!

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Never a gift If you buy your daughter a mobile phone (or phone plan) as a gift it is really difficult to take that gift back. After all she will argue that a gift is owned by the one who received it! That’s why I suggest that parents own all technology in their home and give their children the privilege of using it if they use it responsibly. If the parent owns technology they are also free to install any safety software they feel necessary.

Crystal clear agreements I think it’s ridiculous to have a written agreement for everything that happens in a home. I’m not personally great at keeping checklists on my kids’ chores on whiteboards or charts. I prefer a bit of random chaos. But when it comes to social media a written contract really is essential. Nothing should be left unsaid.

Buy a toolbox Parents have said to me that no matter where they hide their daughter’s phone they always find it. So, there are times when I’ve suggested it is in everyone’s best interest to buy a toolbox from a hardware store, that has a lock and key. During family times, meal times and homework times the phone goes into the toolbox.

Schedule time to check accounts In the busyness of life parents often forget to keep connected to what their girls are doing online. They assume all is okay, and sometimes it just isn’t! It’s a good idea to schedule regular times to check teens accounts (and google their name). Installing the right safety software on technology will eliminate the need for you to have their password. Getting teens passwords is a nightmare!


Set a shut down time The amount of girls who sleep with their phones in their bedroom, and even under their pillow, astounds me. Schedule a shut down time and ensure phones are charged in a place where they aren’t accessible. Our daughters need uninterrupted sleep! I would suggest an 8.30pm shut down time to allow them time to unwind before bed.

Talk about the elephant in the room Our daughters do face real challenges online. We know they are there. They know they are there. We just don’t talk about them very much. The more we talk about the elephant in the room the more likely we are to save our daughters from danger. Parents I promise you that your girls are looking for an adult to delve straight into their world ‘boots and all’. The reality is that nothing will test your relationship with your daughter like social media. Social media gives our teenagers an opportunity to rebel. It ticks all the boxes. It’s an area where teenagers have power over their parents and it is easy for your daughter to exercise that power. That is why no strategy can replace our relationship with our daughters. When it comes to social media, relationship is everything! Michelle Mitchell is the founder of Youth Excel. For more great parenting advice, check out Michelle’s new book “Parenting Teenage Girls in the Age of a New Normal” (Ark House $24.99), now available at all good book stores. Visit www.michellemitchell.org

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we love a mother Balwyn mother of two Felicia Palanca is a former senior artist with the Australian Ballet Company and is now the creative mama behind Flo Dancewear, an innovative children’s dance label. Designed in Australia and using fabrics sourced throughout the world, Flo Dancewear takes Felicia’s passion for dance and combines it with the comfort and flexibility essential for wearable children’s clothing. Firstly, you’re a mum, tell us a little bit about your kids and where you live. I have two children, an 11 year daughter, who was my inspiration for Flo Dancewear and a 7 year old son. Both children are so amazing and talented and so completely different to each other which is lovely. We live in Balwyn, backing onto a big spacious park, which we love. Has dancing always been your dream? How old were you when you started? From the day I started dancing at 3 years of age, I never wanted to do anything else! I remember having music and dancing in my mind the entire time, practicing steps meticulously over and over in my head – and then on my own and in ballet class. I wanted to be the best I could be and I soaked up all the knowledge my amazing teachers passed on to me like a sponge. You were a Senior Artist with the Australian Ballet for over 10 years, what was your highlight of your time here? There have been so many…. Dancing the leading role of Kitri in Don Quixote in Shanghai and being promoted onstage afterward. Performing the lead roles of Swanhilda in Copelia, and Clara in The Nutcracker. Across all of my time with the Australian Ballet I was fortunate to work with amazing choreographers, incredible dancers and beautiful musical scores. These were all major highlights. How did Flo come about? Did you have fashion experience before this? I designed for a large international dancewear company towards the end of my ballet

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career and then for years after I retired. The company was based in Sydney and my role involved a lot of overseas travel. We moved to Melbourne when I was pregnant with Isabella and after taking a year off to immerse myself in motherhood I started back at work and realised it was too difficult to balance work and family life with my head office interstate. Motherhood was my main focus but I also wanted to use what I had taught from designing and being a dancer myself – That is when Flo Dancewear was born 9 years ago. I have an interest in photography and before I started Flo I was taking some photographs of Isabella. I took one of Issy lying on a big pile of beautiful tulle and it ended up being my first Flo Dancewear marketing shot. She was my inspiration. I wanted to create a range of dance inspired pieces in beautiful easy to care for fabrics that were perfect for ballet class or for play. Looking at the 2 – 7 age group, it was important that the range was special but also well priced. In 2015 you launched Flo Active, offering a range of dance inspired clothing with a sporty fashion twist. Tell us more about this range. Flo Active was a natural progression from Flo Dancewear. The collection was designed specifically for the tween market. According to the Piper Jaffray survey on youth spending, gym and activewear now account for one third of teen fashion purchases - up from just 6% in 2008. When I launched Flo Active, there didn’t seem to be anyone focusing on the 8-14 girls market and designing activewear specifically for them.


What can we expect next from Flo? Actually it’s a really exciting time here at Flo headquarters - we are growing rapidly and we are super excited to announce that we are about to launch with a major department store in the USA. We have also now launched a selection of our own Flo Dancewear pieces online here at www.flodancewear.com.au in addition to having Flo Dance and Flo Active stocked nationally at Myer and David Jones stores. We are always pushing forward into new markets whilst striving to look after our loyal Australian customers, rewarding them with new and exciting seasonal prints and ranges. What is the best thing motherhood has taught you? It has taught me the true meaning of love - the love that you have for your children is forever and endless and you would do anything for them. It has also taught me to be more patient and to savour every moment with them because they grow too fast! Any advice for budding young ballerinas out there? Simply to follow your dreams, work hard being a ballerina as it is an amazing career that offers so much joy, travel and life experiences that are hard to put into words. The practicing is hard but well worth it so if it’s what you want to do, then listen to your teachers and just go for it. What’s your funniest parenting story? I have so many of those but my kids laughing makes me laugh the most, so my funniest parenting story was at my own expense. Their favourite story was when I was collecting them from school and I took them to the grocer and whilst carrying too many bags, I pointed to them to make sure they didn’t trip over one of the bumps on the path ahead of us, at which point I of course tripped and flew in the air along with all the groceries! We all ended up in stitches of laughter, as we slowly and surely collected all the lost groceries. As all mums out there know, I was so worried about them falling that I didn’t look out for myself – but the laughs we had were worth it. Find the Flo range at flodancewear.com.au

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NURSERY DESIGN TIPS THAT Add your magic touch to bub’s special place this spring. Here are five on-trend nursery design tips from Elka Voigt, co-founder of Elk & Bee that will inspire the young and the young at heart.

The adventure starts in the nursery Little ones are becoming the world’s most seasoned travelers without even leaving the nursery. Parents are looking to inspire their bub to take their own adventure with travel and adventure themed décor high on trend. Whether it is adventure in the mountains, by the sea or outer space, our impressionable young things can be encouraged to explore all the universe has to offer. Designing your babe’s oasis can be as easy as displaying souvenirs from your own travels, adding a teepee or how about a nautical map on the wall to inspire a wandering imagination?

Statement feature on a minimalist backdrop Clean lines, simple layouts and minimalistic features are key to the contemporary nursery. Perhaps this helps us bring order to an otherwise complex and fast paced modern world. But to add some playfulness to your little one’s room without the clutter, you can simply add single statement items that are both functional and an art piece. For example quirky storage baskets could become part of the room décor or an animal themed kids’ chair could be both a place for pondering and dreaming and a nursery highlight.

Mother nature knows best With more shoppers looking for sustainable and eco-friendly product options, it’s no wonder natural wood is showing up in many ways in the nursery. From wooden furniture to more subtle accent pieces such as shelving, picture frames, toys and décor, the natural tones of 22

wood creates warmth, texture and charm. With a nod to midcentury design, natural wood combines the rustic with the contemporary adding character to any space. Light wood such as beech, oak and pine have been popular, with reclaimed hardwood now on the rise. Add a stylish touch to your nursery this spring by borrowing from mother nature.


INSPIRE THE IMAGINATION Neutral colour tones with a vibrant pop The modern nursery is all too often characterised by neutral colour tones such as white, beige, pale grey and the occasional pastels. If you’re looking to create more energy and want to keep your nursery looking fresh, you can easily accessorize with colourful accent pieces through your décor, pillows, prints and rugs. Keep these accents minimal and the colour consistent. Try picking one or two colours to highlight; you will be amazed what a few small additions can do to create vibrancy.

Animal instincts There is something special about children’s love for animals and who can deny the warm fuzzy feeling you get from our innocent friends. Why not bring this into your little one’s space? If you had a favourite animal as a child, you can pick this as a focus and feature it across a couple of pieces. While adding animal themes to the nursery is nothing new, there are many modern options where you can stylishly add in the wild and wonderful. Whether it’s geometric animal patterns on your throw, a minimalist animal wall print or a rocking ‘horse’, it’s easy to add some animal flair.

Written by Elka Voigt, mama of 10 month old Owen and co-founder of Elk & Bee with her sister Bianka. Elk & Bee was created as a way to inspire the imagination through beautiful nursery and kids’ room décor. Elkandbee.com.au

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mama can Cook! Silverbeet & feta filo triangles

My Mum taught me how to cook spinach and feta pie as a teenager. Making the pie into triangles was a revelation as you can bake and freeze them in advance. Cooking time: 20 minutes Makes: 18 Ingredients:

20ml extra-virgin olive oil 700g (1 large bunch) silverbeet, stalks removed and roughly chopped 1 leek thinly sliced, white and light green part good pinch of freshly grated nutmeg good pinch of salt flakes 200g feta, crumbled 50 g cream cheese 2 free-range eggs, beaten 12 filo pastry sheets 50g salted butter, melted

We make a white version and replace the silverbeet and leek with 1 cauliflower and 1 onion. Blitz them in a food processor and combine them (raw) with the remaining ingredients, then continue as per the method.

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Method:

Heat oil in a large frying pan over a medium heat, add the silverbeet, leek, nutmeg and salt and sautĂŠ for 3 minutes. Transfer to a mixing bowl with the feta, cream cheese and eggs, and mix well. On a floured work surface brush two sheets of filo with melted butter then lay one on the other. Cut the sheets with a sharp knife from top to bottom lengthways into three equal-sized strips. Move the strips slightly apart. Place a tablespoon of the filling bottom left of one strip, then fold on a diagonal to meet the right edge and make a triangle. Fold the triangle up and align with the right side. Continue to fold until you have reached the end of the pastry strip. Brush with the melted butter. Continue with the remaining pastry sheets and filling mixture until all the filling has been used and you are left with 18 filled triangles. Bake in the oven for 20 minutes.


I like to whip up this quick, simple lunch salad when I’m in a rush. The poached chicken can be made in advance and refrigerated until needed.

This is an edited extract from Mr & Mrs Wilkinson’s How It Is At Home by Matt Wilkinson and Sharlee Gibb published by Hardie Grant Books RRP $49.99. Available in stores nationally. Photography © by Patricia Niven

Chicken and miso noodle soup Total cooking time: 24 minutes Servings: 2 Ingredients: 1 x 200g free-range boneless, skinless chicken breast 180g soba noodles 1 cucumber, diced 1 carrot, cut into thin strips or grated 3 spring onions, sliced salt flakes freshly ground black pepper chilli sauce, to serve (optional) Dressing 1 tablespoon togarashi* 1 ½ tablespoons red miso paste 1 teaspoon white sesame seeds 2 tablespoons mirin 2 tablespoons soy sauce 2 tablespoons rice vinegar 75ml non-GMO vegetable oil

Method:

Bring 500 ml (17 fl oz/2 cups) water to the boil in a saucepan. Add the chicken breast, reduce the heat and simmer gently for 6 minutes, then remove the pan from the heat and leave the chicken to poach for 15 minutes, or until the liquid is cool enough for you to remove the meat with your fingers. Dice the chicken breast and set aside. To make the dressing, mix together the togarashi, miso and sesame seeds in a small bowl until combined. Whisk in the mirin, soy sauce and rice vinegar then lightly whisk in the oil. Cook the soba noodles in a saucepan of boiling water as per the packet instructions, rinse under cold water and add to a large mixing bowl together with the poached chicken and all the other ingredients. Pour over the dressing and mix together thoroughly, then leave to sit for 3 minutes to allow the noodles to absorb all the flavours. Season to taste and serve with a little chilli sauce, if you like (I do). For extra flavour, try adding aromatics like herbs and spices or citrus rind to the poaching liquid (which can also be kept and used later as chicken stock). *Togarashi is a Japanese spice mixture available at good Asian supermarkets and specialty stores. 25


We call these pirate cookies as the freckles look like colourful treasure.

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Zucchini and feta frittatas Makes: 12

Method:

Ingredients:

Squeeze out the grated zucchini over the sink to remove any excess moisture, then transfer to a large bowl. Add the feta and mint and mix together well. Stir in the beaten egg, then add the dry ingredients a little at a time, stirring with a fork as you go, until well combined.

2 small–medium zucchini (courgettes), coarsely grated 150 g (5 ½ oz/1 cup) feta, crumbled 10–12 mint leaves, finely chopped 1 free-range egg, beaten 70 g (2 ½ oz) plain (all-purpose) flour 1 teaspoon baking powder 2 teaspoons cornflour (cornstarch) ½ teaspoon ground cumin ½ teaspoon salt flakes 3–4 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil cucumber yoghurt, to serve

Heat 1 tablespoon olive oil in a large frying pan over a medium heat. Add tablespoonfuls of the fritter mixture to the pan to form 3–4 rounds each about 7cm in diameter. Cook for 3 minutes on each side until lightly golden, then remove from the pan, place on paper towel and cover with a tea towel (dish towel) to keep warm. Repeat with the remaining batter, adding another tablespoon of olive oil to the pan with each batch. Leave the fritters to cool completely before packing up into airtight containers ready for popping into lunchboxes or the fridge, where they will keep for up to 3 days. We like to serve these with a simple yoghurt and cucumber dip. To make it, stir together 3 tablespoons natural yoghurt, 1 grated Lebanese (short) cucumber, 5 chopped mint leaves and a pinch of salt flakes in a small bowl.

Pirate cookies These are seriously easy, though because they are so simple it’s worth hunting out good-quality flour and butter to use here as you will notice the difference. Makes: 24 Ingredients: 180g unsalted butter, at room temperature 165g raw (demerara) sugar 1 free-range egg 1 teaspoon vanilla paste 225g plain flour 35g coconut flour 1 heaped teaspoon baking powder 24 chocolate freckles, to decorate

Method: Preheat the oven to 180°C. Line two baking trays with baking paper. Using an electric mixer, beat the butter and sugar together in a mixing bowl until creamy. Add the egg and vanilla paste and continue to beat until light and fluffy, then stir in the flours and baking powder with a wooden spoon, adding a little at a time, to form a dough (it will be quite a dry one, so you’ll need some muscle power to stir everything together!). Scoop out a teaspoonful of the cookie dough and roll it into a ball, then place it on one of the prepared baking trays. Place a freckle on the top of the ball and press down to flatten it slightly. Repeat with the remaining dough and freckles, leaving 5 cm (2 in) space in between each to allow room for the cookies to spread. Bake the cookies for 15 minutes or until lightly golden. Remove from the oven and leave to cool on a wire rack before eating. Keep stored in an airtight container for up to 5–7 days.

TIP: I usually only cook half of the dough when I make these; the remainder of the dough I push into a sausage shape and roll well in baking paper, then put in the freezer. When I need more cookies, I slice them off the roll with a hot knife and bake from frozen. Just add the freckle once the dough has started to soften in the oven. 27


lovely locals 1.

EXPLORING EAST MELBOURNE 1. Fire Services Museum – For the fire engine enthusiasts The museum is located in the original Metropolitan Fire Brigade headquarters, and boasts one of the largest collections of fire-fighting memorabilia, including a display of vintage fire vehicles and other appliances, helmets, 18th century uniforms, badges, models, and much more. It’s run by volunteers who are mostly retired firefighters, happy to regale your kids with a lively story or two. Open Thursdays, Fridays, and Sundays. Check the website for times and entry fees.

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www.fsmv.net.au. 39 Gisborne Street. 2. Cohen Cellars Wine Bar – For a cosy date night or after-work drinks A warm, cosy and inviting bar specialising in boutique wines, an array of craft beers, and a delicious grazing menu. Sit back and relax with a glass of artisanal wine, and enjoy their homemade sausage rolls, wonderful juicy olives from Andalusia, pizzas featuring the best salami from the other side of the Yarra, or choose from their wonderful cheese selection.

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www.cohencellars.com.au. Tribeca Plaza, between Albert St & Victoria Parade. 3. East Melbourne General Store – For all your essentials and old-school favourites The current building was erected on the site of a Dairy, built 150 years ago. The Dairy later started selling groceries, and you’ll still find retro 1970s milk bar café menu, with an old-fashioned level of service. The store caters for everyday needs and essentials as well as offering a range of gourmet and organic goods. It also features a dry-cleaning service, newsagent, take home meals, bottle shop, fresh fruit and veggies, and local bakery goodies. www.eastmelbournegeneralstore.com. 53 Hotham Street.

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4. Kellee Flowers – For all your floral needs Do you need wedding flowers, birthday flowers, or flowers for that special someone? Shop online and order a same-day delivery in Melbourne, or pop into the shop, which is conveniently located near the hospitals and the CBD. www.kelleeflowers.com.au. Tribeca Plaza, 178 Albert Street. 5. Mr Tod Café – For breakfast, lunch, or wine and nibbles Located in a beautiful heritage building, Mr Tod includes a café, patisserie, wine bar, private function room and an adjacent courtyard - an oasis in the heart of Melbourne. Go for a fresh and modern breakfast, or for lunch you can enjoy their quality daily-changing specials. The bar is the perfect place to unwind with work colleagues or catch up with friends; relax in the privacy of the wine room, or listen to live jazz. 2 Parliament Place, corner St Andrews Place. 28

5.


Get more from mama - www.mamamag.com.au | Get social with mama - @localmamamag

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mother’s guilt One emotion that mothers often experience at some point, or for some quite regularly, is that of ‘mother’s guilt’. Mother’s guilt can feel like even when you are doing your best it’s still not good enough for you child or that there is more you could and should be doing for the betterment of your child.

Where Mother’s Guilt Comes From Becoming a parent makes you realise just how dependent children are on their caregivers. As a mother, you feel utterly responsible for not only their safety, but also their happiness and wellbeing. Your love for your child and desire to ensure they are content can lead to worry or fear that at times you are not good enough or doing enough for them. “Before I had children, I would feel guilty about something every once and a while, but since having children I haven’t stopped feeling guilty.” The expectations you place on yourself to put the needs of your child first and give them the perfect start to life can make it feel as though any decision that you make that is for yourself is coming at the expense of your child’s needs. “You feel guilty for everything…guilty that you left your child with someone, guilty because you should have breastfed for longer, guilty because you went back to work. These were all times that I struggled with feelings of guilt in the first year.” Other times, mother’s guilt rises from any situation where there is a sub-optimal outcome. In these instances, what often escapes us is the fact that when it comes to mothering there’s not many win/win scenarios. Often there is no “perfect” outcome or path forward. “I realised how crazy this all was when in the same day that I felt guilty for not cleaning the house whilst I spent time with my baby, I then felt guilty because I cleaned the house and did not spend time with my baby. I couldn’t win – the guilt was there either way.” 30

Whilst mother’s guilt is natural – as we are constantly wanting to do the best for our children – it is not so helpful when it leads you to feel inadequate or harshly judge yourself.

Getting Over the Guilt One of the keys to letting go of guilt is to keep things in perspective. It is important to understand what it is that you are feeling guilty about and why you feel this way, and then try and make sure you are keeping the expectations that you place on yourself in perspective and realistic. Too often mothers place too much emphasis on doing everything, doing it all the “right” way, and/or doing it all perfectly. In reality though, there is usually not one right way to do something and absolutely no one is perfect, so having perfection as your standard is setting yourself up to fail and then feel guilty. To take the pressure off, think hard about the standards you have for yourself, where they come from and if they are simply too high to be achievable. To be realistic, your standards should come from within you and be personalised to you. Think about your strengths and your weaknesses, the parameters of your life and the nature of your child and then set your expectations for yourself accordingly. One of the hardest things about being a mum today is that ‘points of comparison’ are everywhere, especially with the rise of social media. Try to avoid looking at and comparing yourself to what others are doing. People carefully curate what they want you to see and hear about their life – especially on social media and especially when it comes to motherhood. When you look at what some other mother says they are doing and compare it to what you are actually doing, you are literally comparing their fiction to your reality. It’s not an accurate comparison or how you should measure yourself as a mother or what is best for your child.


Just as it is important for you to accept that you are not perfect, it is important for your child to know and understand that their mother, and life more generally, is not perfect either. This will make it easier for them to realise and accept their own imperfections one day. Plus, the adjustments your child will have to make to adapt to your imperfections and our imperfect world can be important for their own physical and emotional development as well as their resilience. Finally, try to remember that the reason you feel guilty is because you care – which is the most important thing. Striking the balance of caring while also being realistic and keeping perspective is a fine art. It may take some time and discipline, but it is a key to managing mother’s guilt.

Help beat the Mother’s Guilt and join MotherJumpers MotherJumpers is an annual charity event where mums (and their friends and family) jump out of planes, in a tandem skydive, all over Australia (or do one of the world’s highest abseils in Tasmania) to raise funds for wonderful charities in Australia that support mums. This year, the MotherJumpers jump will take place on November 11 and 12, inline with the start of Perinatal Depression and Anxiety Awareness Week, and will be raising money for COPE – Centre for Perinatal Excellence. COPE is a not-for-profit organisation dedicated to improving the emotional wellbeing of parents before and during pregnancy, and the year following the birth of a baby. Find out more at motherjumpers.com For high quality, practical information to help YOU work through all the emotional challenges of becoming and being a parent visit cope.org.au

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Building better futures

for children with disabilities

Do you want to talk to a professional about your child’s development or behaviour?

We're a family operated store, running for over 16 years, and a part of the local community. We’re best known for our friendly staff, great personalised recommendations, large children's section and 'hard to find' book search service. We also offer free gift wrapping!

Noah’s Ark offers the following services for children with a disability or additional needs: ✓ Playing Together. ✓ Getting ready for Child Care, ✓ Supporting Positive Preschool or School. Behaviour. ✓ Supporting ✓ Coordination of Inclusion. Supports.

DYMOCKS CAMBERWELL

✓ Parent Connection and Support.

The Well Shopping Centre Shop 114, 793 Burke Road Camberwell (03) 9882 0032 or email camberwell@dymocks.com.au

✓ Parent Education. ✓ Speaking and Listening.

We’re here to help Call 1800 819 140 www.noahsarkinc.org.au

The Art Factory will be the highlight of your child’s week. Enrol now for Term 3. Art Parties for Kids 4-14 yrs

Kids love art parties! Each guest creates a masterpiece! Fully hosted by our wondeful party hosts.

Kiddy Art for Kids 2-5yrs

Explore a new theme each week and take home a masterpiece that your little artist can show off with pride!

After School Art for 5-12yrs A fun, expressive art enrichment program that your budding artist will love. Mon-Fri 4-5.30pm.

School Holiday Workshops

Brilliant workshops for kids 4-14 yrs. See our website for more details.

theartfactory.com.au

Balwyn Nth, Essendon & Malvern 9576 0135 Mention this ad for your free trial class! 32

Live Local - Shop Local - and don’t forget to mention MamaMag!


@CamberwellShops

CamberwellShopping.com.au

Camberwell Junction may be a historic street shopping precinct but there is always something new going on. You need to take a look at what lies behind busy Burke Road. A fresh new look Target and Woolworths are only part of the revamped area known as Camberwell Central which now includes Aldi. Located off Station Street this is also where the Camberwell Fresh Food Market is and this 85 year old traditional market has also had a facelift with a striking new entry from the car park and a relaxing break out space inside. The car park on the other side of Burke Road has also undergone changes with a new entry via Burke Ave and a revised layout offering safer pedestrian access to The Well Shopping Centre. The Well is getting new toilets as the start of an upgrade of this small by convenient mall; the parents room was already 5 star but will now look prettier. Other changes in the precinct include a cool mural by street artist Stephen Baker in the post-office lane and new stores like Sheridan Studio, Provincial Home Living and boutique Ebony M. DINNER WITH THE AUTHOR EVENTS: October 10: Jane Webster shares her passion for France and you go into the draw to stay at her French chateau [valued at $19,000] plus all attendees get a $30 voucher from Blue Illusion Camberwell. Irish author Marian Keyes – October 25, the iconic Kerry-Ann Kennerley shares her stories on Nov 8 and Mike Willesee is on Nov 22. Tickets and more info at Camberwellshopping.com.au Find out more about Camberwell shopping precinct, including shop news, store offers, community events and competitions at Camberwellshopping.com.au

WIN A $1000 SHOPPING SPREE

To help you celebrate the arrival of spring in style, we’re giving away $1000 to spend on a new wardrobe. Explore StyleJunction.com.au for our new season fashion and tell us what you love, or spend $25 or more at Camberwell fashion stores for your chance to win*! Enter online at CamberwellShopping.com.au

CamberwellShopping.com.au Camberwell Shopping | Burke Road & The Junction *Terms & Conditions apply - see website for details. Entries close 31/10/2017.


• TOOLS & HARDWARE • KITCHEN APPLIANCES • WHITE GOODS • BATHROOM & PLUMBING • HOMEWARES • TOYS • AND SO MUCH MORE!

Don’t miss our Pack a picnic lunch and prepare yourself for a unique shopping experience. Whether you are a green thumb, a handyman, a mum to be or a DIY specialist, we have a huge range of products to suit your needs at amazing prices. Come and experience our new Christmas and fairy range!! FIND US AT 2 GORDON LUCK AVE, ALTONA NORTH OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK TEL: 9369 4277 NIGHTINGALECC.COM.AU

Carpark BONANZA Sale

Sat 7/10 - Sun 8/10 Crazy bargains, a sausage sizzle, lucky dip & on the spot prizes!

FEELING GREAT ABOUT HOW YOU LOOK DOESN’T HAVE TO COST YOU A SMALL FORTUNE. FWFY is an online interactive four week program for style, beauty and fashion. Similar to an online fitness program, minus the sweat! The program looks at your skin tone, body shape, face shape and other core elements to create your own style and look. “I want someone to ‘help me’ and ‘hold my hand’ through the process of getting my groove back. I am too drained to do this myself but I do want it to happen.”

This one of a kind program is only $89, and will be available for the first time in November. Visit www.fwfy.com.au to register your interest. 34

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Four weeks for you Women are great givers. Sometimes however we find it difficult to take time out for ourselves. This can get particularly challenging once children come along.

beauty and style professionals to make me over ‘Miss Congeniality’ style. So, I did a style advice package online, which was good but not overly engaging, and I just ended up with a pile of paper. I wanted to go to a proper stylist, but that felt too expensive, too self-indulgent.

Three years ago, after the birth of my second child, I decided to shift the focus from overhauling my body with vigorous exercise or diets, to accepting who I was now and making the best of that.

This led me to think why not merge the vibe of an online fitness program, with a program for style, hair, beauty and a bit of self-love and owning what you’ve got thrown in.

Don’t get me wrong I am all for a new diet/ fitness program (I have tried many), but I was tired, busy and sick of thinking I will just buy new clothes when I lose the baby weight. I wanted to feel ok in the moment. There was enough other stuff to think and worry about! At the time I also suffered post-natal depression which made the pressure to keep the façade of coping and having it all together overwhelming. Mix in multiple rounds of mastitis and the cracks were becoming evident. To get back on track I realised that if you feel good you look better and vice versa. I chatted to other mums and realised that most of us feel the same way and go through a tough time in how we look and feel after children. I had never fully appreciated the link between looking and feeling good. Clothes, makeup, hair (having a shower) had become a chore, not something enjoyable. I thought about how to achieve ease with my style and realised that I would need some help! A crack team of

Four Weeks For You was born out of this experience and is great for any women who wants to give back to herself and explore how she wants to look and present her best self to the world. The program is not just for women with kids, but for any woman who feels a little bit overwhelmed with all the blogs, street style, Insta updates and keeping up with the Kardashians. My background is not style or fashion (however I have always enjoyed it) but I have found this journey of discovery, and meeting people in this space, very fun and exciting. I have put together a team of experts in their field who, are warm and lovely, to not only help you look your best but to make you feel comfortable and supported. We all deserve that, whatever stage of life we are at. By Catherine Williams, Four Weeks For You. This one of a kind program will be available for the first time in November of this year, visit the website www.fwfy.com.au to register your interest. 35


summer skin saviours Tips for Stunning Spring & Summer Skin As the first blooms begin to blossom in parks and gardens all over Australia, the next sign that spring is here - and that a long hot summer is not far away either - is the sight of sun-loving Australians shedding their wintry clothes and showing some skin.

But if your skin doesn’t look its best? It’s a perfect time to invest in rejuvenating treatments that will improve the appearance - and the good health - of your skin to ensure you’re showing the very best version of yourself to the world as the weather warms up.

Skin Protection - For Life Your skin is your body’s largest and fastest growing organ and, despite the important job it does in protecting us against the elements, you probably don’t invest enough time and effort into looking after it the way it deserves to be treated. Looking after your skin now is an investment in time and money that will deliver huge rewards for years to come - with skin that keeps you looking fresh and vibrant, even as you age.

Great Skin Starts From Inside Out Helping your skin have a beautifully healthy glow begins with a good diet. That means avoiding sugary soft drinks and too many other sweet treats and focusing on filling your body with clean, simple nutrition. It’s not hard. Simply by avoiding packaged foods, you’re off to a positive start. Buy fresh fruit and vegetables - choose organic, if your budget allows - and when it comes to fluids, minimise your alcohol intake and choose cool, clear water.

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Skin Deep Beauty Yes, true beauty is more than merely skin deep but there are active steps you can take to keep your skin looking its best as you grow older. At The Skin Boutique sstaff are already reporting a boost in people preparing their skin for the revealing summer season ahead. The clinic offers various options for smoother skin, including Laser Genesis treatment - a safe and effective rejuvenation treatment that offers a gentle way to treat a variety of skin conditions. It works by stimulating the production of collagen and elastin re-growth. How? Micro-pulses of light safely heat the upper dermis just below your skin’s surface to reduce the appearance of fine lines, visible pores and scarring. The result is skin that feels and looks firmer, with a more even skin tone and a look you’ll love.

What skin conditions does the Laser Genesis treat? • reduces redness • evens skin tone • softens fine lines and wrinkles • smoothens scars • reduces pore size • promotes collagen and elastin production

Fruity Wonders Fresh summer fruits, such as blueberries, strawberries and melons are all fantastic natural ingredients to put in your body for a healthy, clear complexion. But did you know that fruit also works wonders on the outside of your body?


Try an Aspect Fruit Enzyme Peel for gentle exfoliation that dissolves dead skin build-up to allow the laser treatment, and any other subsequent skin treatments - such as your basic at-home cleanse, tone and moisturise routine work even more effectively. Post-treatment, a Société Gel Peptide Mask can be applied to your skin to add an extra level of soothing hydration.

Your Skin Is Unique It’s important to remember that your skin is unique. For fantastic skin results in spring and summer, it’s important to talk to a skin treatment specialist, rather than blindly select treatments that may not be right for your skin type and skin issues. Different peels suit different skins, with some being more suitable for very sensitive skin and others offering great solutions to skin of all colours and textures.

Patience is a Virtue Of course, getting great skin for spring and summer doesn’t happen overnight. With the change of season just underway, it’s the ideal time to plan your perfect summer skin now, and start changing those old habits that will help your skin face the world with confidence. It’s rare to find any skin treatment that promises amazing results in a one-off treatment, so be realistic and plan your summer skin now, by exploring a multiple-treatment regime that will get your skin’s fresh new look off to a brilliant start for those sunny days ahead.

UV rays. These days, with so many brands on the market, you can shop around to find sun protections solutions without the chemical nasties - but do check their SPF rating to make sure you are properly protected.

Lunchtime Loveliness While the ongoing duty of looking after your skin is a commitment for life, the great news about some rejuvenation treatments is that they can offer a quick fix pick-me-up to give you that extra sparkle for an important event such as the busy spring racing carnival season and Christmas function season, when all that rushing around from parties to work event can leave your skin looking and feeling tired. The Laser Genesis treatment, for example, is popularly known as a ‘lunch-time’ facial, because it’s considered a minimally-invasive treatment. You can book it in during your lunch-break and be back to face the day and resume most normal activities immediately after your treatment. Of course, everyone’s skin is different and there may be a slight redness - but that should disappear within a few hours of treatment. Your skin deserves to be pampered and with so many treatments offering truly effective results, you can help your skin look its best with just a little planning and sensible care. So look after it - for life! By The Skin Boutique Elwood, Southland and Melbourne CBD www. theskinboutique.com.au

Fresh air and sunshine is a wonderful thing for a vitamin D boost after those months of being rugged up indoors but remember to apply a sunscreen to protect yourself from harmful

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MINDFUL SHOPPING Fast fashion? let’s slow it down... Mindful shopping… finding calmness amongst the chaos How to be a mindful shopper Do you feel overwhelmed when you look in your wardrobe? Or even underwhelmed? Does your wardrobe inspire you to take on the day in style or does it leave you grabbing the first two pieces that you see in the hope that they will resemble some kind of an outfit? With the rise of fast fashion, our purchases are more impulsive than ever before. Seduced by the shiny and new, and constantly chasing trends, we continue to purchase items in the hope of creating the perfect wardrobe, but instead find ourselves agonising over a wardrobe full of clothes saying “I have nothing to wear”. By slowing down your shopping habits and learning to shop mindfully you can make smarter purchases that will not only save you time and money, but also help to reduce the impact fast fashion is having on the environment. This will lead you to create a cohesive wardrobe, of pieces that you love, that will always give you something to wear. Here are my top tips for shopping mindfully and turning a wardrobe of chaos into calmness and creativity…

Be inspired, but not overwhelmed Social media has revolutionised the way we see fashion and buy fashion. It can be a great platform to find inspiration, but don’t overdo it, too much can clutter the mind and have you chasing trends rather than developing your own unique style.

Shop your wardrobe first Take some time to appreciate what you already have and shop your own wardrobe. The opportunity to bring new life to the pieces

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you already own will inspire you to be more creative and help you to realise how much you do actually have. It is also an ideal opportunity to rearrange your wardrobe and even say good bye to those pieces that are no longer working for you. Clear out the clutter and send them to a new home to be appreciated.

Identify the gaps Once you have a clear idea of what is in your wardrobe identify the gaps which need to be filled to make the current pieces’ work. It is highly likely that you will need to purchase the key essentials, neutral pieces that gel everything together; basic tee’s, jeans, black pants, a blazer or belt. Have a goal to buy these pieces first before you buy anything else. Bring it back to basics.

Set a shopping list and budget Always set a list and budget before you hit the shops. This will help you to stay focused and ensure you come home with what you need. Consider setting a budget for a season rather than an item as this will feel less restrictive and assist you to plan out the entire season’s wardrobe giving you the ability to prioritise what pieces to spend your money on. Think cost per wear when purchasing timeless pieces as it’s ok to spend that little bit extra when you know you’ll wear them time and time again!

Shop like a stylist When I’m working with clients I’ll always look for timeless pieces that have longevity. These are the pieces that will work hard in your wardrobe and continue to look amazing after multiple wears. Look for great craftmanship, quality fabric and fit. Sizes, shapes and cuts differ from store to store and even with pieces within the same store so always try things on and make sure you’re choosing the right piece for your shape and style. Don’t compromise on fit and style just for the price.


Get to know your brands Improve your environmental and ethical footprint by getting to know more about the brands you buy from and where and how your clothes are made and sourced. After all, feeling good in what you wear is more than just about looking good. Knowing you’re doing your bit to help the environment and ensure ethical work practices is sure to make you feel more special about the pieces you are wearing.

Someone else’s trash is your treasure Sometimes the best gems are often found at the op shops or vintage stores, where you can pick up a bargain or find something truly unique to add to your style. Increase your chances of scoring the best pieces by getting to know your local op shops and the days they receive new donations.

Shop with a friend Shopping with a friend you trust is a great idea. It’s not only helpful to have that second opinion but it also means someone else will be accountable for your spending.

Not on your shopping list?

Don’t be seduced by the red SALE sign Do you feel like it’s a little win when you buy something at a cheaper price? I’ll admit I have done a happy dance over many bargains in my lifetime. However, it’s important to consider if you would have purchased the item had it have been at full price? If the answer is no, maybe it’s not a win after all. Stick to the classics at sales time and steer clear of trends that may not make it to the next season. So, the next time you hit the shops treat yourself to a ‘mindful moment’ in the fitting room. Remember your style should be unique to you and help present the best version of you. If a piece doesn’t make you feel amazing, it’s not worth the investment. By Simone Thorpe - fashion lover and personal stylist, who believes style shouldn’t cost the earth – both figuratively and literally speaking. Simone is passionate about empowering women to feel amazing from the inside out through group style workshops, shopping tours and one on one personal styling services. stylewithsoul.com.au

Found something you love but it’s not on the shopping list? Put it on hold and think about it for 24-48 hours. In many cases, you’ll walk away and forget about it, however if you can’t stop thinking about it ask yourself the following six questions. • What value is it adding to my existing wardrobe? • Will it still bring me joy long after today? • How will it work back with my lifestyle? • Is it a need or a want? • Does it truly represent my style? • Would I be happy to remove an item from my wardrobe to include this purchase? If you can provide a valid answer to all of these questions maybe it’s worthy of that valuable space in your wardrobe.

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The other mother To help me decide whether or not to fall for a man with two little kids, I asked my stepmum to meet me for a cup of tea at a tiny cafe around the corner from my apartment.

and nodded yes. ‘It’s quite a different role that you’re going to have to fill,’ Fiona added, ‘but my advice to you would be – don’t wait for him, Kelly.’

Fiona’s expertise in the realm outstripped mine. She’d been Dad’s colleague in the late 1980s, before they fell in love. He had two kids. After my parents broke up, Dad and Fiona moved into an old house where my teenage brother and I drank all the orange juice and cultivated mould in spare bedrooms. Each fortnight, Fiona braced and waited for us to leave. She hadn’t been around teenagers since high school. Over the next decade or more, I turned hating her and my father into an art form, a durational piece in which I played the role of a live electric fence.

I didn’t. I jumped straight in with this chap and his two small charges, and quickly learnt for myself how strange the smell of no-more-tears shampoo can be to a woman who hasn’t been around kids since she was a child herself.

Now pushing forty and less charged, we had that cup of tea and I asked what she thought I should do. Although she’d been my stepmum for twenty years, we’d never actually hung out like this before, just the two of us.

Over the next decade or more, I turned hating her and my father into an art form. ‘It was hard, but it got better,’ Fiona said, ‘and now I have you and your brother.’ She reached across the table and put her hand on mine in an unprecedented display of public affection. I took a deep breath and said I had feelings for a chap, Pete, who I’d worked with a while back and had gradually become one of my most trusted comrades. Since the breakdown of his marriage, thirty-something women had been circling him like pretty vultures. I, too, recognised good love material when I saw it, having spent years cultivating crushes on booty callers with closed-down hearts. ‘Do you love him?’ Fiona asked me. I knew I wasn’t going to lose a clear chance at love to a nebulous panic about life with small children,

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Conversations about god and death and cats and shoelaces caught me off-guard So I wrote notes whenever I found myself on awkward angles with these two preschoolers. I took a deep breath and leapt down the rabbit hole at bedtime with a copy of Where is the green sheep without incident. Then on our first outing to Luna Park, I escorted Pete’s five-yearold on the big dipper and halfway round he told me he thought he would probably die on the way down. In the spirit of nearly killing my eldest stepson on our first date, I realised that as a community we needed to talk more broadly about the emotional rollercoaster, the sleeplessness and the surprise joy that comes from stepping into an instant family. Maybe I wasn’t the only thirty-something ex-trashbag who had found herself in love with someone who came with permanent attachments, and an ex, and her partner, and her parents too. Conversations about god and death and cats and shoelaces caught me off-guard with the five year old, and while I loved it, I was nervous about whether I’d mess up his head by sharing my opinions. Other times, a few choice words hit me straight in the heart. Like whenever Pete’s youngest, at three years old, told me: ‘don’t say words’ or ‘stop that dirty smell’. I knew I shouldn’t take it personally, but I took it all personally. I didn’t know how to be a grown-up.


It was a few years down the track when I knew I wanted to write a book about steps. We were sitting at the kitchen bench in front of another dinner of carrots, broccoli, beans and meat before 6pm. The boys were trying to figure out what to call me. ‘I think I’ll call you my spare mum,’ said the youngest, with such tenderness that I nearly popped a valve. ‘And that makes us your spare sons.’ I didn’t expect to find myself in this place, with a husband and two stepsons and then a baby on the way to show Pete and I what it truly meant to be outnumbered. I’m not sure what I expected from love, but I never expected it would include a whole new spare family on top of my existing spare family: people I was at first shocked to be around, then slowly realised I had come to love. Becoming a step-parent is still one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. Few people are ever really ready to bring kids into their life: that’s why parents throw first birthday parties – it’s a ritual to remind them that they have survived this shocking loss of freedom and sleep and privacy and intimacy. There are no such rituals to help step-parents through their first year (however long that first year lasts for them – in my case: five).

‘I think I’ll call you my spare mum,’ said the youngest. One in five of all families are blended these days, or more depending on who you ask. We’re everywhere: stepchildren studying the new grown-up entering our childhood castles; step-parents watching their new charges in primary-coloured playgrounds. Peeling our fingers while peeling apples; keeping a check on our various fears, regrets and jealousies. Somehow, some of us find a path through the dirty laundry, and sometimes even find love – as parents and children – in unexpected places. By Kelly Chandler. Kelly Chandler’s book, The Other Mother, is out now through Affirm Press this year.

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SLIP ON YOUR SHADES Did you know children are more at risk of eye damage from the sun than adults?

Those of us of a certain vintage would remember Sid the Seagull singing the Slip, Slop, Slap message to us on our TV screens. Launched in 1981 by the Cancer Council, this was one of the most successful health campaigns that Australia had ever seen. Sid educated us all to “slip on a shirt, slop on sunscreen and slap on a hat” to help protect ourselves from skin cancer. 26 years later in 2007, the Cancer Council message was updated to add two more “S’s” to the mix – Seek shade and Slide on sunglasses, highlighting the importance of protecting our eyes from the sun’s damaging UV rays. And this is particularly important when it comes to protecting children’s eyes from the sun. A child’s eye lens is not as mature and cannot filter the sun’s ultraviolet (UV) rays as easily as an adult’s. This puts them at an increased risk of greater damage to the retina when exposed to sunlight. Children spend more time outdoors with studies showing that more than half of our lifetime exposure to sunlight occurs before the age of 18.

A 2006 study conducted by the University of New South Wales found that Australian children as young as 8 are showing signs of serious eye damage from the sun. 26% of 9-10 year olds showed damaging changes, while a huge 81% of 12 – 15 year olds showed damaging changes.

Short term effects of UV radiation on eyes include: • Discomfort, blinking and swelling, snow blindness.

Long term effects of UV radiation on eyes include: • Cataracts (cloudiness of the lens) • Macular degeneration (damage to the retina) • Solar keratopathy (cloudiness of the cornea) • Cancer of the conjunctiva or the membrane covering the white part of the eye • Pterygium, a growth of tissue on the white of the eye that may extend onto the cornea where it may distort or block vision • Skin cancer of the eyelids and facial skin Being outdoors has many health benefits for growing bodies and children’s eyes actually need exposure to daylight to prevent or slow the development of myopia (near sightedness). The good news is that good quality sunglasses will still let light through, but will protect children from harmful UVA and UVB rays. It is important to choose sunglasses that comply with the Australian and New Zealand Standards. So no need to keep the kids inside, just protect their eyes as you would their skin when they are outdoors playing sport or just having fun in the sun! By Patricia Feehan, Founder, Pyewear www.pyewear.com.au Pyewear Sunglasses are specifically made for active kids for sport, active play, or chilling by the pool! The lenses are all polarised, lightweight and made from shatter-resistant polycarbonate.

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Join Gru as he teams up with his long lost twin brother Dru to defeat a new enemy named Balthazar Bratt, a 1980s child actor who grows up to become a villain! WIN the Despicable Me 3 DVD (available October from major retailers, RRP $39.95) and add to the summer fun with 3 packs of Minion themed

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Sleep tight – don’t let the beg bugs bite Did you know that after 5 years, up to half the weight of an unprotected mattress is made up of your own bodily fluids, skin cells, bacteria and mould? Half… eewww! And let’s not get started on all those yellow stains. It’s not hard to believe really when at least a third of our day is spent on said mattress, and the average person loses up to 1L of fluid a day, through the skin, pores and mouth, as well as millions of skin flakes. Here are some more nasty bed facts:

SLEEP We spend one third of our life sleeping. New parents lose between 450-700 hours of sleep in the first year of their child’s life and not everyone is blessed with ‘good sleepers’. I certainly wasn’t. My daughter didn’t sleep through till she was almost 5! From restless sleepers, colds and illness, dummy losers to bedwetting, all parents understand the frustration and exhaustion loss of sleep can cause for both themselves and their child.

SWEAT Humans sweat up to 1L of body fluid per night and lose millions of skin flakes. After 5 years, half the weight of a mattress can be made up of our own body fluids, skin cells, mould and bacteria that seep into our bedding. Yuck! I like to think that I only lose sweat in my morning workouts, but it simply isn’t true. No wonder we have to change the sheets so often. Bring on Summer so I can actually hang them outside on the line.

BEDWETTING & INCONTINENCE If you’ve ever suffered from any form of incontinence, you’re not alone. Estimates are that 4.6 million Australians suffer from some form of urinary incontinence, so it is not an uncommon concern, especially after having children. Awkward sneeze anyone?!! Incontinence is not something that is under a person’s voluntary control, and it is not a condition that should cause shame, humiliation or embarrassment, but it’s often part of a mum’s life. Night time accidents in children are practically a given in raising children. Nappies and pullups can fail us at the best of times overnight and while many of us have waterproof protectors on our children’s beds, we neglect to protect our own. I’ve lost count how many times my daughter has crept in to my bed in the night only for both of us to wake up in her puddle.

BED BUGS If the thought of bed bugs roaming freely in your bed at night has you feeling a little less than comfortable, here’s some more facts guaranteed to make you squirm: Bed bugs are small, wingless insects that feed on the blood of humans. Fortunately, their bite is painless however for many people, the bites can become itchy and swell into reddened welts. There has been an increase in the number of bed bug infestations of around 5,000% in Australia since the year 1999. Bed bug infestations often take a long time to detect, and are extremely expensive to eradicate. Bed bugs prefer to hide in bedding, and on mattresses, where they have ready access to a source of food, you!

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Half the weight of an unprotected mattress is made up of your own bodily fluids, skin cells, bacteria and mould.

DUST MITES Dust mites can lurk in an unprotected mattress and are a major cause of asthma and allergies. Despite their tiny size, dust mites produce 1020 waste particles per day! Talk about being regular! Each of these contains a protein known to trigger allergic reactions and asthma. If that weren’t bad enough, these proteins are so light that they float when disturbed and disperse into the air, ready for us to inhale. Recent studies show that as much as 30% of the population are allergic to dust mite waste (the other 70% simply don’t like it!).

The average person loses up to 1L of fluid a day, through the skin, pores and mouth.

So how clean is your mattress? Mama’s tip: When you buy a new mattress, you need to protect the mattress from you (1L of body fluid, gross). But when you have an older mattress, you need to protect yourself from the mattress (and all my daughter’s wee stains!). While both my kids have had Protect-A-Bed® mattress protectors for years, after learning the above facts I recently got myself a top-notch mattress protector to protect myself from my bed!! Happy sleeping for me! A quality assured Protect-A-Bed® mattress protector is like an insurance policy for your mattress. Find out more at protectabed.com.au By Sarah Cavalier

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