Melbourne MamaMag Aug/Sept 2022 by MamaMag

Aug/Sept 2022 MELBOURNE Support and fun for the Melbourne mum WINANEMMA COMFORT MATTRESS WORTH UP TO $1499 Health & Wellbeing Steph Claire Smith Pelvic floor perils Good mum v’s bad mum Remember your dreams

Let their learning story start with us. enquiries@shel.edu.au 1300 786 794 shel.edu.au At Story House, every child’s story matters to us. We believe that each child is on their own unique journey that shapes the person they are and who they’ll become. Black DoreenDiamondDarleyClydeCheltenhamBundooraRockNorthCreek MerndaLynbrookLaraKewKeilorForestEppingHillDownsEast WarrnamboolTarneitSpringvaleNobleMtMeltonWaverleyParkSouth Sat 10 Sept 10am – 2pm OPENNationalDAY

The littlest of our Haileyburians have the perfect environment to shine, like Tailin from our Early Learning Centre. Tailin’s creative zest for life shines through her impressive piano skills, bringing joy to her fellow classmates and teachers alike. And fostering her new-found passion for art has seen our hallways turned into art galleries! Best of all, she’s just starting to make her mark!

haileybury.com.au

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Departures and passports, could there be a sweeter combination in the one photo, especially after the couple of years we’ve had? This mama was lucky enough to escape Winter for a couple of weeks and head to Italy (my step mum lives there) in the July holidays. It’s the first time in my 10 years of being a single mum that I’ve taken my kids overseas and to say I was a little bit nervous was an understatement! Thankfully Etihad looked after us amazingly and we even scored a little business class upgrade! #winning. Two weeks in the Tuscan sun was exactly what this mum needed to recharge the batteries and reconnect with my self and my kids. Of course we’re all back to reality now and it’s almost like it never happened, but it’s equally great to be back in the office with the team working smashing out our fab Health and Wellbeing issue of MamaMag. Mama was lucky enough to chat with Steph Claire Smith this issue, one half of the dynamic duo behind Keep It Cleaner, about how she’s juggling being a new mum with her health and fitness empire. There so much great Health and Wellbeing stuff happening at this time of year and we’re exploring many great topics like dreams (make sure you enter our Emma Mattress giveaway for the ultimate dreams!), collagen options, pelvic floor perils (I hear ya!), hearing loss (get involved in Loud Shirt Day!), egg freezing and more. So enjoy the read and stay healthy Mama!

5MamaMag Aug/Sept 22 CONTENTS The opinions expressed herein are not necessarily those of the publishing staff. Reproduction in whole or part is prohibited without permission of Mama Creative Group. Health related articles are designed to be informative and educational. They are not intended to provide specific medical advice or replace one-on-one advice from your health practitioner. For your chance to win enter www.mamamag.com.au/emmaat Entries are open to Australian residents only. Competition starts August 1st 12.01am and closes September 30th 2022 at 11.59pm. One winner will receive an Emma Comfort Mattress in their choice of size, single, king single, double, queen or king, valued at up to $1,499. Visit www.mamamag.com.au/competitions for full entry terms and conditions. The Choice® top scoring Emma® Comfort Mattress Learn more about Emma at emma-sleep.com.au WIN Mama, you deserve a great night’s sleep! Australia’s Top Scoring Mattress by Choice® 2021 and 2022, the all foam Emma® Comfort Mattress features Emma’s Zero Motion Technology. Whether you sleep with a partner, a child, or a pet, their tosses and turns won’t ever disturb your much-needed 8 hours of zzzs. Plus it keeps your body cool and dry –even on the hottest summer nights. KIC’ing goals 6 We chat to Steph Claire Smith Pelvic floor perils 10 Managing and even curing incontinence At your local pharmacy 12 Five things you didn’t know you could do Perfect pouts 14 Lip care from Winter to Spring Good mum V’s bad mum 16 Working mum’s health implications I’m sorry, what? 20 Talking about hearing loss Collagen 24 Are you a firm believer? How to remember you dreams 26 Try these tips from Rose Inserra More fish, more veg 30 Recipes from Chef Tom Walton Fostering care 34 A foster carer’s story Smooth shaving 36 How to get the best experience Identity after motherhood 38 Why women must fight for it Equitable egg freezing 40 Making the case for equal access Busting common oral health myths 42 Sharing truths this Dental Health Week New on the shelf 44 Mama’s latest book picks Find your best skin 48 Hannah English’s new book Taming negative emotions 50 How we can harness the negative Iron deficiency in children 52 Are your kids getting enough iron? WIN 1 of 5 Paws of Fury movie packs 53 Simply colour to win! Fussy eating 54 How we can help our kids enjoy food Cold water dipping 56 It’s about time you started Vaccination 101 60 The long and the sort of it The art of grieving 62 5 self-care practices to help Worthupto$1499

KIC’ING GOALS WITH STEPH CLAIRE SMITH

When it comes to celebrity health and fitness, one of our fave’s has to be Steph Claire Smith. One half of Keep it Cleaner (KIC), along with her bestie co-founder Laura Henshaw, in 2021 Steph also added motherhood to her long list of accolades. As a co-founder of Keep it Cleaner, Steph oversees their growing health and wellness empire which includes the incredible KIC App featuring workouts, recipes, meal plans and more, in addition to a grocery range stocked nationally in supermarkets, a popular podcast and a huge Facebook community. So we chat to her about how she juggles it all! Harvey turned 1 in May! They grow so fast. What was your favourite, and least favourite, part of being pregnant? The female body amazes me. I loved watching my belly grow and feeling him kicking around. I was really lucky to have a magical experience with my pregnancy. My least favourite part of pregnancy would’ve been the amount of unsolicited advice that just kept coming from all angles, whether it was about pregnancy do’s and don’t or parenting post birth, I heard it all. Towards the end of my third trimester is where it hit me the hardest because it was the tail end of the experience. All I wanted was to have him in my arms and when I look back I wish that I just relaxed a little more, and blocked out the noise a little earlier, as it all started to overwhelm me and make me quite impatient! How did your relationship with exercise change after Harvey was born? Moving my body has always been a huge part of who I am. I was so excited to reach that six week clearance, purely so that I could get a little bit of ‘the old me’ back. Exercising is the most powerful tool for my mental health and has always been a priority to me, but one thing I’ve learnt about myself is that Harvey is now my number one priority. My goal is to be the best mum I can possibly be, but in order to be a good mum, I need to make sure I’m feeling my best, and the most effective way to do that is by moving my body. Now that I’m back at work, I’m learning to juggle me-time and mum-time, so I can fill my cup from both directions! My relationship with exercise is still the same, but my routine has absolutely changed! How did KIC come about to begin with and how has motherhood influenced the business now?

Laura and I first met back in 2012 when we were modelling for Melbourne Fashion Week and we formed an instant bond over our past experiences with toxic diet culture and excessive exercising. We understood how harmful it can be for young people, in particular for women, and we shared this drive to ‘do our part’ to help change this. But we never imagined it would grow to be what KIC is today! We initially launched an e-book in 2015 with healthy and affordable recipes - that actually taste good. We then evolved to an online workout program and launched our KIC app in 2018. We now have over 700 dietitian-approved recipes, 570+ workouts and 70+ meditations, with so much more in the pipeline. Our vision at KIC is to support our community through all ages and stages of life, and my experience with motherhood has definitely played a big role in our product evolution. We launched KICBUMP, our pre and postnatal pilates program in May 2021, which happened to be one week after Harvey was born, the timing was crazy! Through this we saw a massive spike in conversation around pregnancy and parenthood within our

community. It was important to Laura and I that we created a safe and inclusive space to celebrate this exciting stage of life, without overwhelming our core KIC community. So, naturally KICBUMP, the podcast and Facebook community was born. Motherhood is now a huge part of who I am, and I have big plans for our KICBUMP program! How are you managing to balance motherhood and work? Did you take much time off work? Ahh balance… I’m not going to lie, it has been a struggle. In the early days I took time off to enjoy my newborn bubble, but I didn’t have a traditional mat leave. The thing is, KIC was my first baby. I think when you’re a business owner, and you’re truly passionate about what you do, it’s hard to fully switch off. I started tuning in to our weekly team meetings which was really helpful as it gave me a ‘short & sweet’ update on all of the exciting things that were happening. I knew that the business was in good hands, it was more-so I could reduce my FOMO! When Harvey was nine-months-old I returned to work four days a week. We have a hybrid working model with our team but I prefer to head to the office on my work days as I can get so distracted at home knowing that Josh and Harvey are having fun without me! The juggle of work-mum-life is something I’m still working on, I’m not sure it’s ever something we ‘perfect’, it’s all about learning as you go and doing what’s best for you and your family. I’m at a stage now though where by the end of the working week, I’m craving Harvey time, and at the start of the work week, I’m excited to head into the office! So I think I’ve got the breakdown of days right for me now anyway which certainly helps. Community is a big part of what makes KIC so popular. Tell us more… Honestly, we wouldn’t be where we are today without our community, they are the heart and soul of KIC. Our private Facebook group has over 46K members and it blows me away how positive and supportive everyone is. Whenever I’m feeling down, I’ll jump into our Facebook community and read the comments and instantly smile. Our members have made life-long friendships through KIC, it’s so beautiful to see! But nothing beats connecting with our community in person. Earlier this year we had our KIC Tour in Melbourne, Sydney & Brisbane where we worked out with and met over 2,000 members. It’s so special to hear how KIC has helped them build healthy relationships with food and exercise, and learn to move their bodies for the way it makes them feel. It’s the favourite part of my job!

What’s your favourite KIC grocery item (mama loves the apple cider vinegar with ginger, turmeric and chilli!)? Josh and I love pasta, honestly we eat it about three nights a week! The chickpea penne pasta is perfect for when I’m looking to increase my protein intake. I also absolutely love our WPI Vanilla protein powder, it’s so creamy in smoothies! Plus of course as a mum, the Keep It Cleaner toddler range from Coles is always in my shopping cartHarvey’s a big fan of the vanilla wheat free oats and the pasta and pasta sauce!

I know I’ve had a really good morning when I’ve done two things - moved my body and spent quality time with Harvey. That’s what I need to really fill my cup. We’ve just launched KIC Minis, which are our 5-10 minute workouts. I love that if I’m running short on time I can smash out one of these and still get the endorphin hit to fuel me through my day.

to eat intuitively, which means listening to my body and giving it what it wants, when it wants, which is something we preach and teach at KIC! Chocolate is a nonnegotiable for me, it’s something I eat every night because it makes me feel good. My favourite chocolate at the moment is Cadbury Marvellous Creations! YUM.

What’s at the top of your list when it comes to your daily wellbeing rituals?

What’s your favourite ‘naughty/cheat’ meal? I don’t look at foods as ‘naughty or cheat meals’. When you restrict yourself from certain meals, or food groups, you’re building a negative relationship with food. KIC’s dietitian, Liv Morrison, has taught me how

And finally, what’s the worst piece of parenting advice you’ve ever received? When I entered 40+ weeks with Harvey it wasn’t just one piece of advice that got to me, everyone around me thought it would be helpful to share old wives tales to bring on labour. I know they meant well, but I really struggled during this period and had to switch off from social media. I think it’s so important to give expecting mums their space in the lead up to labour. “Have you had your baby yet?” can be such a triggering question, and of course we’ll share the exciting news once they arrive, you just need to be patient. But since being a parent, to be honest, I would just say if you’re going to share any piece of ‘advice’ make sure it starts with something like ‘some people do this’ or ‘this might work for you’ rather than ‘you should be doing this’ or ‘don’t do that’ or ‘I would never do that’. You can find your feel good with a 14-day KIC free trial. Sign up here: keepitcleaner.com

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“Incontinence is preventable and treatable in the majority of cases. The key to preventing or better managing incontinence comes down to protecting and strengthening the pelvic floor and adopting a few healthy lifestyle habits,” she Apartsaid.from pregnancy and childbirth, there are several risk factors for developing incontinence. These include age, being overweight, smoking, menopause, conditions such as diabetes and following bladder and/ or pelvic injury and surgery.

Information on how to do pelvic floor exercises correctly can be found on the Pelvic Floor First website at pelvicfloorfirst.org.au

They’re easy, free and completely discreet, yet most women of all ages neglect the most effective method of preventing, treating, managing and even curing incontinence.

In the lead up to Women’s Health Week from Monday 5 to Sunday 11 September, the Continence Foundation of Australia wants to remind women of all ages there is much they can do to reduce their risk of incontinence. And that doesn’t just mean older women or mothers.

Specialist Women’s, Men’s & Pelvic Health Physiotherapist, Shan Morrison, says “I see a lot of women who have reduced their engagement in exercise and other enjoyable activities and have withdrawn from life physically, emotionally, socially, and sexually.”

Mrs Cockerell, said pelvic floor exercises can be done anywhere, any time. “You can do them on the bus, at your desk, while you’re standing in line for a coffee, and nobody will even know you’re doing them,” she said. And the exercises don’t just help with continence. They can also improve sexual function.

The other important thing to remember, is that there is help available. There is a national continence help line staffed by nurse continence specialists, as well as specific sections on the website with simple instructions on how to perform pelvic floor exercises, and links to resources designed with younger women in mind.

The Continence Foundation was established to promote bladder and bowel control health, and to reduce the stigma and restrictions of all aspects of incontinence across the lifespan. Many people are embarrassed about any incontinence issues. We know that it can lead to some people limiting their social and sex lives and then we start to see it having an impact on their mental health. People think it’s just a normal part of ageing, but it absolutely isn’t, and nobody should feel they just have to put up with it.

According to a survey of more than 15,000 Australian women, less than two out of ten (17.6%) do their pelvic floor exercises daily despite incontinence affecting one in three women who have ever had a baby. And while incontinence can certainly affect men, 80 per cent of those reporting living with incontinence are women.

PERILS

FLOORPELVIC

A 2018 Australian study found that one in three netballers experience incontinence and many women may stop exercising after giving birth due to incontinence.

11 And given it’s such a common issue, there really should be no stigma attached to it. Visit continence.org.au for information, including videos, on how to do pelvic floor exercises, as well options for further help and treatment. Or call the National Continence Helpline on 1800 33 00 66 between 8am and 8pm Monday to Friday. The Continence Foundation of Australia is a not-for-profit organisation and the national peak body promoting bladder and bowel control health, incontinence prevention, management, education, awareness, information and advocacy. With representation in each state and territory, the Foundation provides information, support and resources for individuals, carers and professionals. www.continence.org.au Women’s Health Week is Monday 5 to Sunday 11 September 2022. Women’s Health Week is a nationwide campaign of events and online activities – all centred on improving women’s health and helping you to make healthier choices. By the Numbers • 80 per cent of those living with incontinence are women • One in three women who have ever had a baby live with incontinence • Over half of women living in the community with urinary incontinence are aged under 50 years • One in three netballers experience incontinence • 10% of young women aged 15 to 24 experience incontinence

Visiting the pharmacy to pick up medications or everyday hygiene items is a pretty common practice.

Did you know that approximately 500 tonnes of medicines end up in Australian landfill and waterways from incorrect and unsafe disposal each year? That’s a lot of unnecessary and potentially toxic waste. Luckily, many pharmacies offer a free service where you can return empty blister packs and any unused, expired or unwanted medication. This makes for a much safer, environmentally conscious disposal. Chat to your local pharmacist today to find out if this is a service they offer.

There’s nothing quite as frustrating as having to find someone to witness the signing of a stat dec any time you need to verify your age, renew your passport or make an insurance claim. What few people realise is that you can head down to your local pharmacy to have a pharmacist witness your signature instead. Provided your documents are legitimate and legible, it’s likely you’ll get your stat dec signed in record time! DIDN’T KNOW YOU COULD DO AT YOUR LOCAL PHARMACY

But despite the amount of time we’ve all spent browsing the pharmacy aisles while we wait for a prescription, it’s likely many of us are unaware of some of the handy services offered there. So here’s a little run down…

It’s easy to be overwhelmed by the various brands of medication on offer at your local pharmacy. As a result, you might not be aware that some of the more well-known brands are significantly more expensive than their generic alternatives (while containing the exact same active ingredients). If you’re someone who is regularly purchasing medicine, opting for the generic option is a great idea – and you’ll likely save a small fortune in the long run! If you’re unsure of the appropriate generic brand, just ask your pharmacist and they’ll be happy to point you in the right direction. Popular brands like APOHEALTH, Chemists’ Own or Blooms The Chemist have a wide range of quality generic products at a much lower price, and are available at most community pharmacies.

Book a health test or screening

Save money on medications

Get your stat dec signed

There are a number of important medical tests that you now no longer need to visit the doctor for – a great option if you’re short on time. Participating pharmacies can conduct tests like blood glucose testing, anaemia testing, bone density testing or even bowel cancer screening. So, next time you’re looking to get a medical test on your lunch break, pick up the phone to your local pharmacy and find out if this is a service they can provide.

Get an absence from work certificate Did you know you can easily obtain an absence from work certificate at your local pharmacy? Many people are pleasantly surprised by this convenient hack – a much simpler process to the alternative of long wait times in a doctor’s office. An absence from work certificate covers you if you need to take a day off due to a minor ailment – like a headache or mild cold – and need to provide your employer with evidence. It’s worth noting that obtaining this type of certificate incurs a fee, and it can’t be used for severe injuries or illnesses. In certain situations, a medical certificate from your GP may be your best bet but it’s handy to know your options!

Dispose of blister packs and expired medications safely

5 THINGS YOU

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Dr Bronners Organic Peppermint Lip Balm (RRP $6.55) Made with organic beeswax, this lip balm provides a protective barrier to the elements with no synthetic ingredients! Organic jojoba, avocado and hemp oils help with extra moisturisation and only the finest essential oils are used for fragrance.

Ethique Juicy Lip Balm™ (RRP $12) Almost 200 million plastic lip balm tubes are binned every year and the vast majority are never recycled. So, Ethique has delivered 100% plastic-free, home compostable packaging. This sweet, yet citrusy lip balm is scented with pink grapefruit and vanilla and works hard to hydrate, smooth and nourish lips.

Hemp Heavy Duty LipCare (RRP $12) Packed with hemp seed oil to soothe and hydrate this heavy-duty lip care helps to protect your lips from the elements. Keep it in your pocket on days out to prevent ultra dry lips.

Frank Body Lip Balm (RRP $13) This moisture rich lip balm is multi-purpose, made with clean ingredients to hydrate lips, cuticles, brows, and dry patches all day long. Use pre- or post-pash and let the blend of coffee seed oil, vitamin E, and lanolin smooth, repair and protect for your plumpest pout yet.

Moisturise and protect your kisser all day long with this fruity lip balm. This silky smooth SPF 30 sunscreen lip balm with added aloe and Vitamin E will protect and moisturise all day long... just try not to lick it off.

Angel Wings Lip Balm Duo PackMamma & Mini (RRP $55) This gorgeous set includes a lip balm for Mamma and her Mini. Rich in nourishing oils and flavoured with zingy organic peppermint, the tinted Mamma lip balm has a super smooth (not sticky!) finish. The Mini Me has a sweeter organic peppermint taste and just a touch of tint to keep it fun.

SunBum Original Lip Balm Watermelon (RRP $3.99)

With the weather changing as we head into Spring, it can be hard to find the perfect product to provide that all important protection for your lips. Hydration is key and protection from the elements is still as important as it was last season. Mama has put together her top lip products to keep your pout just perfect!

PERFECT POUTS FROM WINTER INTO SPRING

Biode Tinted Lip Balm - Lilly Pilly (RRP $24) An all natural tinted lip balm formulated to deeply moisturise and protect your pout whilst adding the perfect wash of colour for that “your lips but better” effect using pink clay, Alkanet Root and a hint of rose essential oil. Doubles as a light cheek and eye stain for triple the benefits from one little tube.

Kiehl’s Lip Balm #1 in Mango (RRP $17) Coveted since the late 60s, it shows true determination if you can smooth on this mango-flavoured balm without licking it off in seconds. Replenishing squalane rises to the occasion alongside aloe vera and vitamin E, working together to give dry, chapped or cracked lips a new lease on life, instantly. Pop it on and let it sink in.

Dr Roebuck’s Darling Lip Therapy (RRP $18.00) A super-nourishing lip balm to hydrate and protect this delicate skin, Darling Lip Therapy delivers all your lips need to weather dehydrating indoor and outdoor environments, especially during the cooler months. Aesop Protective Lip Balm SPF 30 (RRP $20) A hydrating balm enhanced with UVA and UVB filters to shield lips from the sun’s damaging rays, while botanical oils soften, hydrate and nourish. Formulated without silicone, paraffin, beeswax or other animal -derived ingredients.

Burts Bees Ultra Conditioning Lip Balm (RRP $6.99) Kiss dry lips goodbye with this ultra-hydrating lip conditioner infused with rich Kokum, Shea and Cocoa Butters. The moisturising lip balm nourishes and makes your lips feel luxurious. 100% natural and free of parabens, phthalates, petrolatum and SLS this will beautify and revitalise your lips.

We Are Feel Good Inc. Cocoa Lip Balm SPF 50+ (RRP: $19.95) Enriched with Vitamin E, Cocoa Oil, Shea Butter and Omega 3, 6 & 9 for extra hydration and nourishment, the Cocoa Lip Balm SPF 50+ is broad spectrum and up to 4 hours water resistant to protect your lips from the harmful rays of the sun.

• pain,

As a society, one that is edging very slowly towards gender diversity in the workplace, there is still a discord, in my belief, in the expectations placed on working mothers. “Good mums” can work as if they don’t have children, and parent as if they don’t have a job. If we are able to compartmentalise ourselves in the workforce, without kids interfering with the way we perform our profession, then we are doing good in society. “Bad Mums” find themselves at times in that messy middle, having moments where we need to finish early, or god-forbid, alter our work hours so we can parent and work effectively. How does being in this constant framework of flux impact on the way our brain perceives our health? And how does it contribute to the mental load of mothering and home life that we are working within daily? Our amazing brain is designed to handle stress. We have systems in our body that keep us safe when we need to respond to get away from predators, or think hyper-focused when in a tricky situation. The thing with this amazing part of our brain is that it isn’t supposed to be on ‘alert’ all the time. The last two years have primed our brains to be on high alert. Add in to this navigating the stressors of mornings, getting kids where they need to go, showing up in your workplace without vomit on your pants from your baby and with a focus on the job at hand… to only realise you need to pump at lunchtime, try and eat, and not take too long so you can have a shorter day and get the kids before the sun goes down. It’s a chronic form of low grade stress that is impacting on ourWehealth.know that stress affects everyone differently, yet if you look down this list how does stress show up for you? And is this stress causing you to have more of those “I’m a bad mum” thoughts? including back pain focus or not anger

• headaches • upset stomach • forgetfulness • lack of energy • lack of

• overeating

• difficulty sleeping • drug and alcohol misuse • loss of interest in things you once enjoyed GOOD MUM VS BAD MUM THE SOCIAL IMPLICATIONS OF WORKING MOTHERHOOD ON OUR HEALTH

So which one are you? Good or Bad? As working mums, we are thrust into determining how we fit into this paradigm of good vs bad. The concept of being either a good working mum or a bad working mum can be arguably embedded in our psyche as we move into the working mum world. Yet who decides what is good and what is bad?

eating enough • easy to

2. Drink more water (and maybe a bit less of that sweet nectar of the gods - coffee).

1. Move your body (even for 10 minutes in the morning whilst the kids watch Bluey), to wake up your brain and get your synapses firing.

4. Connect with a friend. 5. Call in support – partner, professional – however you can get it. For society as a whole to allow working mothers to thrive within their family units and support the next generation, honouring how we can destress this generation of mothers, without the mum-guilt, is where the magic lies for all of us. Dr Ali Young is a Chiropractor and author of Work.Mama.Life. She works with women in her online courses, and is passionate about supporting working mums to reclaim their health, find their self and have ripple effects on the next generation of humans inheriting our planet. www.draliyoung.com “I speak with 100s of mums each month, and they are commonly struggling with figuring out how to dial down stress responses”

3. Write that next day’s list before you go to bed… it can gift you a better quality sleep (and whilst you’re at it, hit the hay 30 minutes earlier).

I speak with 100s of mums each month, and they are commonly struggling with figuring out how to dial down stress responses so they can be calmer in their day, more connected with both their peers and their families, and find some joy again. The hot tips that I give them are pretty simple, yet if we can master one or two of these, it can go a long way to dialling down our stress response, and allow our health and self to restore again.

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Hearing loss affects 3.6 million Australians a year, with a further 1.3 million living with a hearing condition that could have been prevented, so it was great to see Mattel recently announce the launch of a new addition to its Fashionista line, a Barbie with behind-the-ear hearing aids. To accurately portray the hearing aids (which are pink, of course!), Barbie consulted US educational audiologist and hearing-loss advocate Dr. Jen Richardson who has 16 years of experience performing over 12,000 hearing loss interventions with children, to help accurately portray hearing aids for the doll in the Barbie line. But back to the real people… Kelly Sanders, a Perth mum, is one of the 3.6 million Aussies suffering hearing loss. She was born with hereditary acute hearing which caused her to experience hearing loss when she was seven years old. Growing up was difficult for Kelly as prior to diagnosis she faced issues at school including teachers not understanding why she couldn’t follow directions. “I’d already been in school for a couple of years when my hearing loss manifested. The teachers thought I was misbehaving or naughty, but I didn’t understand why. I’d get in trouble for little things like colouring in with crayons when we were told to use pencils, things like that. But it turns out I simply wasn’t hearing the instructions.”

The teachers were concerned so her parents took her to get her hearing tested. Once the issue was worked out she got hearing aids, but as a result she always felt different to her peers which left her feeling isolated and unable to form close connections.

Whilst chatting with Kelly on the phone, you’d never know she was deaf. But she’s worked with the right teams, especially her audiologist from Audika, to ensure she lives life to the fullest. Eventually hearing aids were not enough, but today, thanks to a Cochlear implant, she’s a bubbly, enthusiastic mum of a 2-year-old boy, and quite hilarious if I’m honest! But that doesn’t mean she hasn’t, and still doesn’t, endure being treated differently.

“I’d only wear one hearing aid and hide it behind my hair to try and look normal. They were huge, massive and I made it so much harder on myself by trying to blend in and be normal. The irony was that most of the people around me didn’t even realise I was deaf.”

“When I got my cochlear activated I could hear my cats bell for the first time! And when the microwave beeped I had to ask my husband what it was! It was really hard to put an understanding to what I was hearing, but it was amazing.”

I’M SORRY, WHAT?

• About 2 in 5 of people with hearing aids feel they have better conversations, 1 in 3 feel more connected to their family, and 25% say there is less stress on their

•include:objective tests, such as auditory brainstem response testing, which measure the electrical activity in the brain in response to a sound

• don’t respond when called

hearing issues can run in the family Kelly has some anxiety that her son may become deaf one day. But she is comforted in knowing she’s in a great place to support him should the time come.

Some signs that your older child may have trouble hearing include that they:

• talk too loudly • watch the television with the volume turned up too high

Signs of hearing problems in older children

Diagnosis of hearing problems in children

www.audika.com.au

If you have any doubt at all about your baby or child’s hearing, have them tested. The type of tests used to diagnose hearing loss depends on the age of the child, but can

• appear inattentive and prone to daydreaming.

Hearing defines how we communicate, how we understand one another, and how we connect. When someone has hearing loss, it doesn’t only impact their day-to-day life, it impacts their relationships. This can have an enormous impact on mental health. Audika offers hearing checks, free for people aged 26+, and it’s as easy as booking online.

• two-and-a-half to three-and-a-half years – has clear speech with a good vocabulary.

• 1 in 4 people globally will be living with hearing loss by 2050, and a further third of those people will live with it untreated.

• Globally, one in three (30%) of people associate family history to hearing loss

• pronounce words incorrectly

• simple tests such as shaking a rattle nearby and observing the child’s response (behavioural observation audiometry)

• using Sound Scouts, an Australianinvented, online game app test for children.

• 12 to 18 months – knows the names of favourite toys, begins to imitate simple words and sounds

• six to 12 months – turns head towards known voices or sounds, starts to babble

• tests with an audiometer – a machine that produces sounds such as beeps and whistles. Whether or not the child can hear certain sounds helps to pinpoint their degree of hearing loss

If you have any doubt at all about your baby or child’s hearing, have them tested. The earlier hearing loss is identified, the better for the child’s language, learning and overall development.

• 18 to 24 months – has a small vocabulary of single words, and can understand simple directions such as ‘Give mummy the ball’

Signs that your baby can hear well • newborn to eight weeks of age – startles or widens their eyes at sudden noises nearby, and is woken or stirred from sleep by noise

• have a dip in school grades (because they can’t hear the teacher)

• complain of a ringing sound in their ears (tinnitus)

• eight weeks to four months – looks towards direction of sound, and may quieten while listening

Knowingrelationshipthather

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Our skin is made up of almost 80% collagen, which is why, for a very long time, these supplements have been regarded as the ‘eternal youth’ miracle to improve and maintain skin health as well as joint, gastrointestinal and bone health. The magic of collagen doesn’t stop there though. It’s also used for its weight loss abilities and its capability to reduce inflammation and the prevalence of cellulite. #winning Of course, the biggest driver of collagen supplement sales across the world is the potential to help slow down the skin’s natural ageing process and the best type of collagen for this is Type 1, mostly found in marine collagen. The best benefits of collagen

• reduces the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles

• promotes hair & nail health & growth

• improves gut health and digestion

Beginning to see what all the fuss is about? So what does a Collagen supplement actually do for a mama?

• increases skin elasticity

• helps build muscle

• improves cellulite • helps the body fight infection

• reduces inflammation and joint pain

Sounds like a hot beauty trend that’s here to stay right?

• increases skin turnover for more youthful-looking skin

COLLAGEN–ARE YOU A FIRM BELIEVER?

Why do I need to add a collagen supplement into my diet?

• increases bone density

As soon as we hit 25, our bodies produce less and less collagen, which results in sagging and wrinkles. However, whether in powder form, liquid or capsule, Collagen supplements promise to stop the hands of time ticking. They’ll give you back your luscious pre-baby locks, flawless skin & nails to die for, as well as help heal your stretch marks and promote general good health starting in the gut!

If you’re into skincare you’ll more than likely be taking a collagen supplement, and if you’re not, you probably will be after reading this! I take it every day, swirled into a glass of water, usually washed down with a coffee chaser (I’m trying my best) and I’ve definitely seen a marked improvement in my skin! The reason us collagen lovers are devout is because the results are clear to see without a needle in sight!

I’ve put together a few of my favourite collagen supplements to get you started. It can take a few goes to find one that fits your lifestyle, your needs and your taste buds but I’m certain, once you start seeing the results, this is one beauty trend you’re going to stick with!

Skinstitut’s new Collagen Plus (RRP $49.00) is scientifically proven to support skin firmness, hydration and elasticity and uses hydrolysed marine collagen which is easier to digest and absorb, maximising the benefits. Collagen Plus is flavourless, odourless and heat stable, so you can add it to whatever you wish!

Australian owned SUP helps boost collagen production and skin elasticity and firmness, minus the one-hour skin routine! Drink your supplement on-the-go with these handy super shots (RRP $34.99 for 8 vials) which contain 5000mg of marine collagen, vitamin C & jasmine green tea to help you glow on the go! SUP is a range of functional supplements designed to help you get more out of life. Nourish your skin, hair and nails from within with Collagen Beauty™ Wildflower, a naturopathically formulated blend to help you glow from the inside out with VERISOL® Bioactive Collagen Peptides, vitamin C and zinc. This Wildflower flavour is a delicious way to drink Collagen Beauty™ straight on water and is a fruity and floral infusion of vibrant berries, sweet pear and beautiful violet undertones. (RRP $42.95) The Broth Sisters Bone Broths are mineral rich infusions made by slow cooking the bones of healthy pasture raised animals. These delicious broths have deeply nourishing and healing properties that are missing from many modern diets.

Integrating these Vida Glow natural marine collagen sachets into your daily routine, has been clinically proven to smooth fine lines and wrinkles, increase skin firmness and enhance skin elasticity, so us mamas can shine at every age. This Vida Glow formula is infused with real peaches, adding a subtly sweet, fresh flavour, so what food or drink you mix it in is up to you. (RRP $70 for 30 servings)

26 HOW TO

There are many physiological and psychological reasons for forgetting your dreams, but the most important thing is to consider whether or not you have consciously stopped dreaming your inner dreams, your passions. When there’s a drought in your vision there will be a greater chance that you forget your dreams. Dreams need to be mined like gold or silver or diamonds; their value lies in their uniqueness to you. Dreams are the secret wishes of your soul, the connection to your deepest intuition. Try these tips and see how your dreamwork progresses. Intention. Before going to bed, set the intention to remember your dreams. You may want to re-read some of your previous dreams in your dream diary to strengthen the waking to dreaming bridge, or meditate on a question you’d like answered. Everybody dreams, so if you can’t remember your dreams set your intention before going to bed. Ask for a dream. Tip: write the intention down and put it under your pillow. Use lavender oil to awaken your memory sense and make sure you are relaxed before going to sleep. Use alsoguidedtechniques,meditationmusicormeditation.Youcanfindanumber of apps to help you with going to sleep. Keep a dream journal. Write down the dream as soon as you wake up, using as many details as possible including the date. Most importantly, list all the emotions you felt during the dream. Within five minutes of waking up you lose 50 per cent recollection of what you dreamed and, after 18 minutes, 90 per cent of the recollection will be gone. Occasionally if the dream is a vivid one you will carry a part of it with you for the day, but most of the smaller details will have been forgotten. Record your dreams daily.

Tips For Remembering Your Dreams

If you find you can’t remember your dreams you’re not alone: most of us forget our dreams on waking. Many people declare they never dream, but everybody has several dreams per night. As most dreams occur at the end of the sleeping cycle (REM sleep) and are often interrupted by having to get up in a hurry in the morning, there is no time for your brain to take a moment to recall the dream vividly unless it has had an emotional impact on you.

Tip: keep a blank journal by your bed and write down everything you remember. As you keep a journal over the years you’ll notice the rhymes and loops or cycles in your life. Dreams are like looking after a garden: they will bloom and thrive if you pay attention and tend them Sketchregularly.ordraw if it helps you to record your dreams. The dream you recall the most will be the last one you had before you woke up; if you remember just a fragment, try not to judge or interpret it. You will have a series of dreams – some people remember up to 10 dreams per night – but you may consider the fragments

REMEMBERBETTERYOUR DREAMS

Tip: avoid using an alarm clock. Train your body to wake you up instead; you’ll be amazed by how accurate your body clock can be.

Persistence. As with any area in which you want to succeed, you have to persevere with the activity until it becomes part of your routine. The more you engage with the world of dreams the richer your connection with your inner self will be. Make it a priority to read books on dreams, share dreams with friends and family, keep a dream journal and incubate dreams when you need guidance. Don’t neglect your dream world. Deepen your practice for long enough and you will consider your dream journey the most essential history of your inner life. Recording dreams will allow you to get in touch with your inner wisdom and assist you in using your intuition to make decisions about your waking life.

Connect common images to specific situations in your waking life. Ask yourself: does the theme remind you of anything or anyone in your life? What’s been going on in the last few days or weeks? What event or emotion may have triggered the dream? What emotions were felt during the dream and when you woke up? With regular use of your dream journal you will find you can create your own personal dictionary of symbols. When you analyse your dream it helps to identify how you feel. Once these emotions are brought to the surface you can deal with the issues related to them if you choose. Tip: keep twin journals: a journal of the day and a journal of the night. In the night journal record your dreams, and in the day journal track signs and synchronicities you see in your daily life so you can open up to awareness of the world around you.

Be gentle with your waking self and beware of the sudden jolt between being in deep sleep and fully awake.

27 incomplete and unimportant. Every part of the dreamscape is essential, with many gold nuggets being found in the fragments.

Edited extract from Inside Your Dreams: An Advanced Guide to Your Night Visions by Rose Inserra (Rockpool Publishing $29.99), available where good books are sold and online at www.rockpoolpublishing.co

If you remember your dreams, start with them. If you don’t, start with whatever thoughts and feelings are with you as you welcome the new day or in that interval between two sleeps (the sleepwake state), when creative ideas, precognitive visions and spiritual awakenings often stream through. Keep your eyes closed and remain in your waking position. The dream can easily be dislodged, especially if you are thinking of your day’s schedule. Stay present with the dream, like you are holding a precious young baby. Be gentle with your waking self and beware of the sudden jolt between being in deep sleep and fully awake. That abrupt severing could cause you to lose the elusive dream, which will flit and fly away if you don’t gently encourage it to remain with you.

All donations over $2 are tax-deductible. ABN 81 462 345 159 Thanks to the amazing contributions of supporters like you, these are just some of the programs and services that are made possible through Red Nose Day: • Peer-support sessions • Specialist bereavement counselling • Treasured Babies • Hospital to Home • 24/7 support line • Safe Sleep Advice Line • Safe Sleep Training • Research grants

loudshirtdayFriday21October All proceeds raised support life-changing services for kids to learn to listen, speak and achieve their goals. Wear it loud for kids with hearing loss Sign up today

Season by season, his book is bursting with easy-to-make recipes, and sauces, that celebrate the abundance of top-quality local ingredients and make it a breeze for you to eat more fish, more veg and is a great cookbook for Father’s Day or for anyone wanting more fish and veg in their diet and repertoire.

In Tom’s new cookbook, More Fish, More Veg, he walks you through the key cooking methods for perfect fish and veg step-by-step, and provides pointers on sustainability and seasonality that will take the guesswork out of what fish to buy. He’ll also show you how to make veg the star of the show with his vibrant dishes that are full of life and colour.

Makes 1 ¼ cups: ½ cup hulled tahini Juice of 1 lemon 2 cloves garlic, finely crushed Sea salt flakes and ground black pepper

Garlicky whipped tahini: This is my everything sauce – I literally spoon it over everything from fish to a tray of roast veggies. It also makes a killer dip and is a great vegan replacement for yoghurt. I love this sauce as it is, but you could add so many other flavours to it like chilli, spices, miso – it really is that versatile.

Chef Tom Walton, who lives with his wife and three young children between Sydney and Byron Bay, is an award-winning chef and restaurant entrepreneur. He grew up in the Blue Mountains west of Sydney, where he was immersed in the vegetable gardens and kitchen of a Lebanese neighbour, his adopted grandmother. Her influence opened his heart and palate to a world of Middle Eastern food and culture that continues to fuel and inspire his cooking today. In recent years, his family-friendly recipes for the home cook have inspired a tribe of dedicated fans who love his approach to food which he calls ‘deliciousness’: less-ismore, riotously colourful, veg-centric, boldly flavoured food that just happens to be healthy.

Combine all the ingredients in a bowl and season to taste. Store in an airtight container or jar in the fridge for up to 1 week.

MORE FISH, MORE VEG

Let’s get saucy!

Makes 1 ¾ cups 1½ cups (390g) natural Greek-style yoghurt 2 cloves garlic, crushed 1 tablespoon sumac Juice of 1 lemon 2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil Sea salt flakes and ground black pepper

Sumac yoghurt: This is the perfect no-fuss, make-ahead sauce to have on standby in the fridge. Sumac has such a wonderfully fresh, fragrant, slightly sour flavour that really livens up dressings, salads and fish. You’ll find so many uses for this sauce – I use it throughout the book. You could also thin it out with water and drizzle it over salads. Try stirring through some chopped fresh mint and grated cucumber and serving it as a dip.

Place all the ingredients in a blender with 2/3 cup water and blend into a smooth paste. Adjust the water and lemon juice until you have a silky consistency. Alternatively, combine the ingredients in a bowl with a whisk or fork, whisking in the water slowly until smooth and combined. Store in an airtight container or jar in the fridge for up to 1 week.

The Heart Foundation recommends we eat 2-3 servings of seafood per week, but most Australians don’t or are a little nervous about cooking fish. But with a few super simple techniques in your tool kit you’ll be confident to give it a go.

31 This dish is simplicity at its best, taking no longer than10 minutes from start to finish. It makes the perfect light meal in the warmer months. For a more substantial bowl, toss the seared tuna through some cooked pasta!

4 x 150–160g tuna steaks Sea salt flakes and ground black pepper

Seared tuna minute steak

1/3 cup olive oil 1 clove garlic, crushed 250g red grape tomatoes 250g yellow grape tomatoes 1/3 cup pitted kalamata olives, roughly chopped 1/4 cup capers, rinsed and Handfuldrainedflat-parsley leaves, roughly Handfulchoppeddillsprigs, roughly 1choppedlemon,cut into wedges Extra virgin olive oil, to drizzle 400g cooked spaghetti, reserving ½ cup starchy pasta cooking water (optional) Dried chilli flakes (optional) Method: Preheat a large non-stick frying pan, char-grill pan or barbecue over high heat. Season the tuna steaks with salt and pepper and drizzle with 2 tablespoons of the olive oil. Cook in batches for 30 seconds on one side and remove from the pan without flipping. If you prefer your tuna well done, cook for 30 seconds each side and then transfer to a plate to rest for 1–2 Addminutes.theremaining olive oil to the pan with the garlic, tomatoes and a pinch of salt. Cook until the tomatoes begin to burst, then add the olives, capers and a crack of pepper. Add the herbs and stir through. To serve the tuna as it is (pictured), spoon the tomatoes over it. Squeeze the lemon juice over the top and finish with a drizzle of extra virgin olive oil. To serve the tuna with pasta, slice it into thin strips and combine with the cooked spaghetti, tomato and herb sauce, reserved starchy pasta cooking water and a good glug of extra virgin olive oil. Finish with a squeeze of lemon juice and dried chilli flakes, if you like.

Serves: Ingredients:4.

Method: Soak eight 12 cm bamboo/ wooden skewers in water for 10 Placeminutes.thefish in a bowl with the ras el hanout, some salt and pepper and 2 tablespoons of the olive oil and toss to Cutcoat.one of the lemons in half lengthways and then cut each half into eight thin slices. Thread the fish onto the skewers in between the lemon slices – you want three pieces of fish and two slices of lemon per skewer. If you have time, place the skewers in the fridge for up to 1 hour to marinate. Preheat a barbecue or chargrill pan to high. Toss the onion in the remaining olive oil and season lightly with salt and pepper.

Ingredients: 600g firm white-fleshed fish, such as ling, Spanish mackerel, swordfish, gemfish or barramundi, in 3cm pieces 1 tbsp ras el hanout (North African spice mix, available at well-stocked supermarkets) Sea salt flakes and ground black pepper ¼ cup olive oil 2 lemons 1 brown onion, in 1 cm slices To serve: 8 small Lebanesestyle flatbreads 1 cup (220g) hummus 3 handfuls of your fave herbs 1 tomato, sliced 1 Lebanese cucumber, sliced ½ cup sumac yoghurt (see previous page), or natural Greek-style yoghurt

Cook the fish for around two minutes each side, and the onion until it’s charred and gnarly, about two minutes. To serve, lay the flatbreads out, spoon some hummus onto them and top with the herbs, tomato, cucumber and the charred onion. Place a fish skewer on top, then pull the bamboo skewer out and discard. Finish with the yoghurt, wrap it all up and dive in! Serves: 4 Images and text from More Fish, More Veg by Tom Walton, photography by Rob Palmer. Murdoch Books RRP $39.99 thisor

Fish shawarma-style wraps

Smoky whole eggplants with crispy chickpeas, olives and tahini

To serve 2/3 cup garlicky whipped tahini (see preivous page) 2 tablespoons za’atar 1/3 cup pitted kalamata olives, roughly chopped 1 cup roast chickpeas

Ingredients: 5 Seaeggplantssaltflakes and ground black pepper

2 tbsps extra virgin olive oil 2 tbsps chilli oil Juice of 1 lemon 2 tbsps pomegranate molasses

Handful dill sprigs and mint leaves, roughly chopped

Serves: 4. No other vegetable gets me more excited than charred eggplant – it’s a feast for the senses and takes me straight back to my childhood. Cooking vegetables whole this way is so often overlooked, but it’s a great technique for coaxing amazing flavour out of ingredients without fuss.

Method: Preheat a barbecue to high and cook the eggplants whole for 15 minutes, turning throughout, until the skins are charred and the eggplants are soft. Alternatively, working in batches, place the whole eggplants over an open gas cooker flame and cook for 10 minutes, turning throughout, until soft. You can also bake them by placing them directly onto the oven racks and cooking at 230°C (450°F) for 20–25 minutes, until soft (though you won’t get the same smoky flavour). Place the cooked eggplants on a wire rack set over a plate or tray and allow them to drain and cool for a few minutes, then carefully peel off the burnt skin, leaving the eggplants whole and the tops intact, if possible. Carefully transfer them to a serving platter, season with salt and pepper, then drizzle with the olive oil, chilli oil, lemon juice and pomegranate molasses. To serve, spoon the garlicky whipped tahini over the eggplants and sprinkle with the za’atar. Top with the olives, crispy roast chickpeas and herbs, and dig in.

Jen and Kirk made the decision to ease into the caring experience by doing some respite care. After a couple of years of this they were invited to provide specialist foster care to a 12-year-old with complex needs.

“People often ask us how we go about saying goodbye to someone after they’ve been a part of your family for more than a year, but thankfully it doesn’t really happen like that. Jamie has now gone to a foster carer that also looks after her younger brother. We’ve now become her respite carers, so she still comes to stay with us every other weekend. It also makes it easier because we are so happy with where she has gone to live now; the fact she is back under the same roof as her brother is such a wonderful outcome for “Foreveryone.”usithas just been such a joy getting to know Jamie. You get to see the young person past their behaviours. Often people who hadn’t seen Jamie for a while would tell us how much she’s changed since being with us – things that you don’t necessarily notice day to day; that she’s more chatty and confident for example, or that she’s looking you in the eye when she’s talking to you.”

“We’re a blended family, we have six kids between us. Some weeks are very busy and then others more quiet – it can be particularly noisy when our three teenage girls are home! We had a baby daughter at the time too, she was at the age where she needed a lot of care and attention, so someone would always be at home to spend time with Jamie and support her.”

“There were some difficult times during Jamie’s stay with us, but the good times completely outshine the bad. It reminds me of when you’re expecting your first baby – everyone tells you what it’s going to be like, but you don’t really know until you’re going through it yourself! You have the sleepless nights for example, but you don’t dwell on them because you get these little moments that are just so rewarding, and it makes it all worthwhile.”

Even before Jen and Kirk met, they had both thought separately about becoming foster carers. It wasn’t until they saw an information session on foster care advertised through Anglicare Victoria that they decided to find out more about it as a family.

FOSTERING CARE

Since Jamie’s placement ended, Jen and Kirk have continued to care for older children and teenagers. They’re currently looking after two siblings from the same family. “We always have a break between having one young person leave and the next one arrive, it means we can have a period of reflection, to talk about how we can improve as foster parents, and to reconnect as a family.”

For more information about becoming a foster care with Anglicare Victoria, please visit anglicarevic.org.au/fostering

“Jamie* came to us after spending three months in a residential care home. The team at Anglicare Victoria were really keen to get her into a home where she could feel safe and supported by a family,” the couple said.

“We’ve seen Jamie make enormous steps forward. I think her knowing that we weren’t going anywhere helped her feel at home with us. She absolutely loves spending time with Nina –our youngest – and the challenging behaviours she arrived with have stopped occurring.”

“The most important thing for us is that the young person knows that our home is always a safe and consistent place for them to be. If and when they want to open up to us, we’re here, and we’ll provide a warm and welcoming home for as long as they need it.”

Get more from mama - www.mamamag.com.au | Get social with mama - @localmamamag 35 Our children need caring homes. Call 1300 889 335 or www.anglicarevic.org.au/fosteringvisit BECOME A FOSTER CARER

5. Shave in one direction To help prevent annoying ingrown hairs, avoid shaving in different directions. Without adding too much pressure, downward blade strokes work best. With a superior 5-blade razor, one pass is usually enough to remove the hairs easily. Gently stretching out the skin with the other hand makes a smoother surface for effortless shaving. Avoid re-shaving over delicate areas. With the right prep and care (and the right razor!), there will be less trauma and a more enjoyable shaving experience.

2. Fresh razor heads work best Quality blades make a huge difference in the quest for a silky smooth bikini line. A dull blade tugs delicate skin and can cause inflammation around hair follicles, increasing the risk of razor bumps. With a razor subscription, fresh, recyclable razor heads get delivered on demand. Because you control your subscription, the convenient delivery of new blades fits perfectly with your regular shave routine.

It’s always best to avoid heavily scented products on your delicate areas. Exfoliation is a major must because it teases out ingrown hairs and lets the blades get even closer to your skin, for an up-close, personal shave that is as smooth as silk.

lightly with a body scrub, washcloth, or loofah with soap also helps—but remember to be gentle: less is more!

SMOOTH SHAVING

6. Rinse the razor between shaves In between each shaving stroke, rinsing the razor helps prevent clogged blades. Removing debris and hair build-up means a sharper shave.

36 Ahhh, the old bikini line. Sure it’s the middle of Winter and you might have let the old girl go, but before you know it the sun will be shining again and you’ll be reaching for the bikini, and the razor once more. But ouch, the bumps, the rash, it’s not all roses. The Bachelor’s Abbie Chatfield talked about it a while back on socials - but we know she isn’t alone in experiencing shaving bumps down there. The reality for the reality TV star—and everyone, really—is that shaving bikini lines can cause irritation.

If you’re a woman who chooses to groom her bikini area, use these top tips from Make My Shave for a smoother shaving experience:

1. Invest in a quality women’s razor Picking a premium women’s razor that’s designed to suit sensitive areas is the first step in making sure your bikini line is left smooth and Whenrash-free.choosing your razor, look out for three things: multiple blades, a lubricated cushion, and a flexible head. 5-blades make a touchable difference and give a much closer shave around your precious parts. A quick, gentle shave means less risk of nasty nicks and cuts, and less chance of unsightly (and annoying) irritation.

3. Don’t forget the pre-shave prep! Moist skin is an essential part of a safe, smooth shave. If shaving happens in the shower or bathtub, make sure to wet the bikini area with warm water before getting started. By softening the outer layer of skin, hair removal is easier, with less drag and less chance of uncomfortable razor Exfoliatingburn.

4. Match shaving cream/gel to your skin type When shaving your bikini area, extra slickness can make all the difference. Whatever product you choose, make sure it’s fragrance-free to reduce irritation risk. Letting the cream or gel soak in will help soften the skin before shaving. Look for eco-products especially designed for pubic hair

11. Clean and dry your razor Rinsing the razor thoroughly with hot water after each shave will help protect the blades and prolong the life of your razor.

12. Choose sustainable Technically, whether or not your razor of choice is friendlier to the planet doesn’t make it friendlier for your skin. But it’s definitely friendlier for your soul! Luckily, smooth, easy shaving doesn’t have to cost the earth. Make My Shave’s sustainable shavers subscriptions plants trees for Australian wildlife, provides free carbon offset delivery, and includes a free compostable mailer so that customers can send back their used heads for recycling! makemyshave.com.au

9. Soothe and moisturise for baby smooth skin Moisturising after shaving is a body care must-do! Stick to unscented, alcohol-free moisturisers. Aloe vera, jojoba oil, and vitamin E are great skin hydration and will help skin feel as good as it looks.

7. Close those pores! After shaving, make sure all traces of shaving foam or gel have been rinsed away before running cooler water over the area to close the pores and prevent bacteria or dirt from getting under the skin. To avoid the risk of irritation and reduce razor burn, one sneaky tip is to hold a cold compress on the delicate area.

8. Treat with tea tree if needed No matter how careful you may be, sometimes small nicks still happen. Using a natural tea tree antiseptic spray or lotion can help relieve any stings and minimise the risk of infection.

10. Don’t forget sun protection Shaving that silky smooth bikini line may be all about getting beach-ready (especially if there is a tropical holiday on the agenda!) but it’s important to remember that freshly shaved skin is sensitive to sunburn and needs protection. Plan shaving for 24 hours prior to sun exposure for safest results.

I don’t have to remind you that we’re bloody exhausted, but I think we all need reminding that present mothers are not born from zero sleep or losing ourselves in the cycle of giving to others. When we finally reclaim our identities, our children will be much better off for having an interesting (albeit possibly more embarrassing—according to any teenager) mother who is being herself, pursuing her desires and reclaiming what’s hers.

38 IDENTITY

MOTHERHOODAFTER

Why women must fight for their identity after motherhood I knew motherhood would have its challenges, what I didn’t expect was the persistent guilt every time I took time out for myself. There’s an expectation even today that a woman should, at the cost of her career, friendships, social life and identity, immerse herself into motherhood faultlessly. It’s little wonder that when we eventually emerge from the fog of early motherhood, we no longer have any idea who we were or who we’re supposed to be. There’s a narrative that continues to tell us that unless we’re superwoman juggling an impossible number of tasks with an Instagrammable-body we aren’t worthy or we’re doing something wrong. When mothers are written into stories, we are often given the role of nurturer or fun police, employed to reign her partner and children in when things become too rowdy. Don’t even get me started on fairy tales, where mothers are dead, missing at sea or evil step-mothers.

Why do we so often reduce women to such limited roles? We don’t want it all, I’m not even sure we ever did, because most of us are just trying to get through the day. It’s difficult to recall our desires, pleasures, hobbies, sexuality, and intellectual stimulants when society keeps reminding us that once we’re mothers it’s not our role to be fun. Women have had to fight for everything— the vote, property rights, equal opportunity and pay, even what we do with our own bodies. Luckily, motherhood is not for the fainthearted and what we do retain is usually a fighting spirit and a sense of humour. How else could you possibly deal with the (beautiful) horrors that are childbirth and all the delightful post-partum things that no-one warns you about.

The bad news is the only way to reclaim who you were or who you want to be is to become a little selfish. We’ve been brought up to believe that selfishness is one of the worst qualities a person could possess, and yet every time I travel, I’m reminded that I should fit my own oxygen mask before aiding others.

What if being a little selfish could transform us into better human beings? Perhaps carving time out for ourselves, without guilt, is the key to retaining or reclaiming our identity after motherhood. We also shouldn’t think that the time we spend apart from our children must be productive. You don’t have to be changing the world or writing a novel, you could be bingeing Netflix or having a quiet coffee alone in a café like an actual adult. Whatever it is that brings you back to zero and reminds you of who you are and what you have to offer the world, is what you should be doing.

By Dani Vee. Words and Nerds Podcast legend Dani Vee has over 52,000 listeners every month and has just released her very own kids’ book in August, My Extraordinary Mum! See page 44 for more details.

5–11 September 2022 Artwork by Tam BowerJean Hailes is supported by funding from the Australian Government. womenshealthweek.com.au

Instead, it’s claimed under item numbers that are used for standard in vitro fertilisation (IVF) cycles. This suggests the funding scheme for egg freezing hasn’t been specifically considered. If there’s a “medical” indication for egg freezing (that is, a “medical” threat to fertility), Medicare rebates about 50% of the costs. However, the increasing number of people seeking “elective” or “non-medical” egg freezing because of age, must self-fund the entire procedure.

Our latest research suggests that women think more financial support is needed to help access egg freezing. The changing landscape of egg freezing Egg freezing has been offered in Australian assisted reproductive technology (ART) clinics since the late 2000s. Since then, several things have changed:

• We became better at freezing and thawing eggs.

• The scope for egg freezing widened—while initially used by people with “medical” threats to fertility (for example, prior to cancer treatment), many are now seeking egg freezing as a pre-emptive measure against the onset of age-related infertility. Despite these changes, many policies governing egg freezing haven’t been revised since its introduction into clinical practice. Currently, egg freezing isn’t a standalone item for rebate in the Medicare Benefits Scheme.

40 Latest Australian data indicates that the number of human eggfreezing cycles performed each year has increased more than 1000% from 2010 to 2019. Despite this, egg freezing remains prohibitively expensive, with a single cycle costing up to $10,000. Due to these costs, individuals may delay accessing egg freezing. This, however, comes at a biological cost, as the number of good-quality eggs decreases with age, meaning the chance of falling pregnant using these eggs will be very low.

FREEZINGENSUREMAKINGEGGEQUITABLEFREEZINGTHECASETOACCESSTOEGGISEQUITABLE

• In 2012, the American Society for Reproductive Medicine removed the experimental label from egg freezing.

Regardless of indication for egg freezing, the reason that all egg freezing is needed is to safeguard a chance at having genetically related children. Having the opportunity to have children is highly valued—if it wasn’t, we wouldn’t have the ART industry. However, much like other ARTs, the costs of egg freezing are significant, and are a common barrier to access. Healthcare dollars are limited, so controlling access to funding may be unavoidable. But since having access to subsidised treatment can greatly influence who can access egg freezing, we need to ensure the criteria used to distribute funding are ethically justified. This is particularly important since, in the absence of affordable treatment and/or public funding, alternative funding schemes are emerging that potentially introduce further ethical issues.

A growing trend is the introduction of egg freezing as an employee benefit. Companies in Australia are beginning to offer this, but there are unresolved concerns about whether this is appropriate, and what impact this may have on employees’ decision-making around family-planning. A medical solution to a social problem?

It’s worth noting that the rising need for “nonmedical” egg freezing does point to larger problems. For one, the low public awareness of the limitations of fertility and ARTs, as well as the social barriers, such as the structure of educational institutes and workplaces that make having and raising children while maintaining a career difficult. However, while considerable efforts are needed to improve our social policies to better-support people to have children when they desire, there’s still a place for egg freezing. Having access to generous family-friendly policies will be of no use to individuals not in a position to have children due to personal circumstances, such as not having a partner.

Our recently published study investigated women’s views on funding egg freezing. Of the 656 women who completed the survey, almost one in two participants thought Medicare should cover the full cost of medical egg freezing. In addition, approximately two-thirds thought there should be some financial support for non-medical egg freezing—with 42% indicating that Medicare should subsidise the costs. As one participant put it: “Why should wealthy people be able to access it, but not poorer people?”

Not only do these findings not align with the current approach to funding egg freezing, they also suggest that some people think public funding should be available, regardless of whether it’s sought with a “medical” or “non-medical” indication.

This raises an interesting question as to whether the indication for needing egg freezing should be relevant when determining who gets access to Medicare funding. Until recently, prioritising funding to medical over non-medical egg freezing hasn’t been challenged. However, in August this year, France enacted a new bioethics law that included allocating public funding to support individuals to access both medical and nonmedical egg freezing. France’s policy is the first instance where, for the purpose of determining eligibility for funding, the indication for needing egg freezing is irrelevant—meaning access to egg freezing isn’t influenced by whether the threat to fertility is considered to be medical or non-medical.

Support for more financial assistance

While egg freezing won’t guarantee future genetic parenthood, for some people it will greatly improve their chances. Therefore, care is needed to ensure access to egg freezing is equitable and just. By Molly Johnston, Assistant Lecturer, Monash Bioethics Centre; Teaching Associate, Obstetrics and Gynaecology, Monash Health. This article was first published on Monash Lens.

Impact on access to egg freezing

For Dental Health Week 2022 the Australian Dental Association (ADA) is urging people to do a little bit every day to keep their mouth in great shape.

Truth: There’s a whole industry of wellness products filling chemist and supermarket shelves and many include fluoride-free toothpastes. But without the essential ingredient of fluoride, the toothpaste may not protect the teeth as much as necessary for optimum protection.

There’s a very large body of evidence showing that fluoride toothpastes prevent more tooth decay than non-fluoride toothpastes.

It’s in our water too and Australian studies show this reduces tooth decay in children by 26–44% and 27% in adults. Tooth decay is a largely preventable disease and the addition of fluoride to most Australian water is a substantial help in preventing decay. Despite the claims of minority groups, there’s extensive research that shows there are no adverse health effects from fluoride, a naturally occurring mineral, when used within recommended limits.

Some commonly-held myths and the truths behind each. Myth: It doesn’t matter what toothpaste you use so long as you brush.

There’s a lot of misinformation and noise out there around the best ways to keep your mouth healthy. Here are some of the most common myths the ADA hears about through its members – and the right way to do things so your mouth will love you for it.

“If you look after your teeth by observing the ADA’s four key messages, you can have your teeth for life,” said the ADA’s Oral Health Promoter and dentist Dr Mikaela Chinotti. “That means brushing morning and night with a soft bristle toothbrush and a pea-sized amount of fluoride toothpaste, flossing once a day, eating a nutritious diet low in added sugar and visiting your dentist regularly. “And none of these habits take long. These routines added together amount to around only five or six minutes a day– and they’ll benefit you for your entire life.”

BUSTING COMMON ORAL HEALTH MYTHS

FROM THE AUSTRALIAN DENTAL ASSOCIATION

Truth: If you’ve done it correctly, two minutes will do the job. Brushing beyond that isn’t needed if you’ve done a thorough job during the recommended two-minute period.

Truth: This is not the case. One study showed that on average, less than half of dental plaque was removed when bushing with a manual toothbrush for 2 minutes. With so little plaque removed and it then building up again throughout the day, brushing teeth twice a day is recommended by the nation’s dentists to keep control of plaque levels.

Myth: Charcoal toothpaste is healthy for teeth. Truth: This is not the case for all toothpastes or powders containing charcoal. A 2019 report in the British Dental Journal showed that for people with periodontal disease (gum disease affecting the gums, bone and ligaments that hold the teeth in place), there was the potential for charcoal particles to collect under the gums and cause the gum tissue to appear grey/black in colour, or build up in the grooves of the teeth or surface defects on white fillings. Needless to say if this happens at the front of your mouth it will show! The report also found that 92% of charcoal toothpastes or powders included in the study didn’t contain fluoride and that the charcoal could be abrasive and may cause wear of the tooth surface.

Myth: Brushing once a day is enough.

Truth: We all like a sugary treat but keep your daily consumption to within World Health Organization guidelines of six teaspoons a day maximum. After eating or drinking something containing sugar, rinse your mouth with water. It can take at least an hour for your teeth to recover from acid attacks caused by sugar, so wait an hour before brushing as doing it too soon will damage the tooth enamel softened by sugar.

Myth: I can eat something sweet so long as I brush straight after.

Myth: Brushing alone will keep teeth and gums healthy. Truth: You need to clean between your teeth every day, in addition to twice-daily brushing, to remove the bacteria and food particles from between the teeth. Toothbrushing can’t reach these areas, no matter how well you do it. Cleaning between the teeth with interdental brushes or floss helps keep gums healthy. Gums are hugely important as they’re a part of the foundation that holds the teeth in place.

Myth: The longer you brush the cleaner your teeth will be.

Truth: If you haven’t had your mouth checked by a dentist recently, you won’t know if you have an untreated crack, cavity, exposed root or other problem you can’t feel. If the bleach escapes from the standard-sized bleach tray that comes with off the shelf whitening kits, and it gets into that untreated area, you could suffer pain from the teeth or from your gums. It’s always advisable to get your teeth checked first and even better to get them whitened with a dentist’s supervision, either in a clinic or at home with a dentist-supplied kit as they can monitor your progress.

Truth: Dental researchers working in this area have found plenty of evidence to show how oral health affects the rest of your body, particularly in relation to diabetes, and cardiovascular disease, where gum disease is not only a risk factor for these conditions, but also a factor in causing these conditions. Research has shown that people with gum disease have a 2.5 times increased risk of having a heart attack compared to the same group of people without gum disease. What they have yet to determine is if the prevention or treatment of gum disease reduces the number of heart Don’tattacks.have a regular dentist or one who’s nearby? No problem - the ADA’s Find-a-Dentist search engine at www.teeth.org.au makes it easier.

Myth: what goes on in my mouth won’t affect the rest of my body.

Myth: Tooth whitening kits off the shelf are OK to use unsupervised.

My Extraordinary Mum by Dani Vee In this quirky picture book, Dani Vee invites readers to rethink what they know about mothers via an original and fun story, rich in visual prose. You’ll meet an extraordinary mum who reflects the many forms of modern mums among us. She moves to the beat of her own drum, encouraging her daughter to lean into the unknown, to try new things, and above all else—to be herself.

Published by Larrikin House. RRP $19.99.

Published by Larrikin House. RRP $24.99.

new on the shelf kids

The Sea Below my Toes by Charlotte Guillain You love who you love, and you build a great team, because family’s all that you dream it to be. From Byll and Beth Stephen, the writers behind the ABC TV musical sensations Teeny Tiny Stevies, comes a gorgeous reimagining of their much-loved song, Family (Love is Love).

Published by Walker Books. RRP $25.99.

Published by HarperCollins. RRP $29.99.

Ella and the Useless Day by Meg McKinlay Ella’s house is full of things… useless things! At least that’s what she and Dad think. But when they decide to have a clean-up day, something very curious happens. Maybe what is useless to them is treasure to someone else?

Meowster Chef by Sarah Speedie Tonight is the night. The show of the year. The crowds hurry in, ready to cheer! Just one of these cats will win the chef’s crown, and the keys to a sparkly new restaurant in town. But... with a splash of hijinks and a dash of drama, will any of these contestants make it to the end and be crowned Meowster Chef? Or will their big ideas go up in flames?

Where? by Jordan Collins

1) Find Thor’s beloved hammer

Published by Walker Books. RRP $16.99.

156-Storey Treehouse by Andy Griffiths Andy and Terry are celebrating Christmas in their 156-storey treehouse which now has 13 new storeys, including an aquarium wonderland, a wishing well, a world record breaking level, a TV quiz show hosted by Quizzy the quizzical quizbot, a lost property office, a lost sausage office, a super-stinky stuff level and the amazing mind-reading sandwich-making machine, which makes the perfect amazing sandwich for you—every single time! Well, what are you waiting for? Come on up!

Published by Allen and Unwin. RRP $15.99.

As the train Wolf Girl is driving hurtles towards the locked gates of an enemy city, the last thing she expects to spy out the window is her own long-lost sister! Soon Gwen and her dogs are on an epic chase across country, encountering deadly enemies and plenty of prehistoric surprises. But just when things seem most dire, help arrives in unexpected form!

A heartfelt picture book that challenges racism from an exciting new voice that is both a cry of pain and a demonstration of inner strength, which takes us on an intergalactic journey past collapsing stars and glowing nebulae to remind us not of our differences but of our shared humanity. Published by Allen and Unwin. RRP $24.99.

Odin has given Loki another chance to prove himself worthy of Asgard. But earning everyone’s trust is tricky, and when Thor’s hammer goes missing, everyone blames Loki! Outrageous! To clear his name he must:

2) Uncover the real thief

Published by Pan Macmillan. RRP $14.99. Loki: A Bad God’s Guide to Taking the Blame by Louie Stowell

45 t(w)een

3) Force everyone to admit they were wrong

Crash Course: Wolf Girl 7 by Anh Do

An easy feat for someone as handsome and clever as Loki…

Five months after Mel told her husband to leave, a ghost moved in upstairs. A young man who reminds her, with eerie intensity, of a past lover, someone who changed Mel’s life and then vanished. When the man’s travelling girlfriend joins him, Mel’s obsession with the couple upstairs builds and the boundaries between the two homes begin to blur, with devastating consequences. The Couple Upstairs is about one strange summer of dazzling, curdling infatuation. Writing with both a light touch and vivid intensity, Holly Wainwright explores love, regret, whether you can stop history repeating, and whether or not you should.

Published by Pan Macmillan. RRP $34.99

COOK by Karen Martini

Published by Hardie Grant. RRP $19.99

The Couple Upstairs by Holly Wainwright

46 adults

Karen Martini’s COOK: The Only Book You Need in the Kitchen is the essential Australian cookbook for the food you’re cooking at home today. Covering a generous breadth of cuisines and ingredients across well over 1000 recipes, this book bursts with Karen’s love of cooking, inspiring ideas and enduring principles that make her flavours timeless. COOK will stay fresh in your kitchen for years to come, providing for the everyday as well as life’s special occasions. Be guided to pull multiple dishes together to build an inspired meal, or to omit ingredients for your dietary preferences. Karen will lead you to bold, simple and satisfying results time and time again. Published by Hardie Grant. RRP $100.

Together We Can by Claire O’Rourke

Inspiring stories about people around Australia who are taking action on climate change, helping create a better future for our children and for the planet, while at the same time deepening connections with each other. These stories show how contributing to healing our broken world also enriches our connections with each other. It’s what we need to face uncertain times.

You’ll Be a Wonderful Dad by Ailsa Wild You’ll Be a Wonderful Dad is your practical and emotional guide on fatherhood in the lead up and months following the birth of a baby. Once a letter to a dear friend and quickly passed on from dad to dad, Ailsa Wild’s warm and encouraging words of precious love and excitement have expanded into a beautiful hardback book to be shared on the parenting journey. You’ll Be a Wonderful Dad is a kind and important guide on how dads can be proactive in supporting their partners and family through the lead up to birth and new parenting. Complete with illustrations from Bernard Caleo, this is a must-read and perfect gift for new or expecting fathers.

Published by Allen and Unwin. RRP $32.99.

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If I had a party on the weekend, I’d attack spots using a scrub or a squeezing tool. Of course, this made it worse. I put toothpaste on spots after reading about it in a magazine, and one time I even used Borax – a house and laundry cleaning product. It’s used for cleaning so maybe it would ‘clean’ my skin? Unfortunately not. It gave me a chemical burn, and it definitely made the spot worse. At the time, my parents insisted all would be OK and that the acne was due to changing hormones. It was, but it was still painful and I had terrible self-esteem. This is not uncommon – skin conditions are linked to issues with mental health and body image, and there is even an emerging field in medicine called psychodermatology, combining a doctor’s experience in dermatology with an understanding of mental Breakinghealth.outdoes not mean your skin is dirty, nor does it mean that you are dirty. It’s a medical condition, much like a headache, and it can be managed. I’d love never to see the word ‘dirt’ in marketing copy for a face wash again. What dirt? Did you dive into a garden bed? Although my skin has never truly been oily, I moved on to a 3-step skincare system designed for oily skin. But almost any skin type can break out, not just oily skin. Naturally, using a harsh skincare system twice daily, and once again neglecting to moisturise, did me no favours and left my skin angry and stripped of its natural defences.

Classmates commented on my breakouts in a less-than-kind way and I had a couple of partners (whose opinions I gave more time to than I should have) who would criticise my skin, teeth and weight. That’s a discussion for another day but if your partner treats you this way: Dump! Them! Immediately! All of this led to bouts of low self-esteem in my teens to early 20s, as you’d expect. The ’00s were a different time, which is something people always say before they try to justify something awful that used to be ingrained. It was trendy to be sample size, breakouts were not seen in media or advertising, and tabloid journalism consisted of unflattering swimsuit photos of women along with comments about their cellulite (which is completely normal by the way) – the perfect recipe for body dysmorphia, distorted self-image and eating disorders. I came to deeply dislike the use of ‘before and after’ photos for weight loss, procedures, skincare and makeup. While they can be used scientifically if photographed in the exact same conditions or using a special camera, in advertising the two images are often so clearly different. The ‘after’ photo is shot in a studio with makeup and great lighting – and almost definitely retouched in post-production. You can’t compare yourself to Eventhat.though body acceptance has come a long way, these attitudes are still prevalent today in beauty and fitness. We’ve moved from diet culture to wellness culture, but it’s the same thing in a different outfit – ‘you need to lose weight’ is now packaged as ‘everything must be clean, pure and natural’. Both are rubbish. You are valid at any weight, and striving towards wellness leaves behind those who can’t, such as those with a chronic illness. You are valid, ‘well’ or ‘unwell’. This moving target intentionally makes us feel bad about ourselves and our lives, to encourage us to buy more stuff.

FIND YOUR BEST SKIN

48 Like more than 90% of teenagers, I had acne throughout late primary and high school. I tried to punish my skin into shape with harsh and stripping products, used a foaming acne cleanser, and was too scared to moisturise in case I broke out. I couldn’t understand why my acne wouldn’t clear up. I thought that thorough cleansing would clear the acne because my skin must be dirty. Sound familiar? My acne did clear up when I was 19, but it came back in my mid-20s. Sigh. Contrary to popular belief, a lot of people do not ‘grow out of it’. Adult acne affects 64% of people aged 20–29 and 43% aged 30–39.

Now, in my early 30s, my skincare has taken a turn towards ‘anti-ageing’ , but this terminology doesn’t sit well with me either. I know we’re all afraid of showing our mortality, but I also know that looking like myself only a few years older is hardly the worst thing in the I’veworld.also seen the phrases ‘authentic ageing’ and ‘well-ageing’, but I don’t love those either. There is no obligation to age well, or authentically. You can age as inauthentically as you like. Because who is the judge of that? What’s the benchmark? Let’s just keep our skin happy and functional and enjoy ourselves and our Let’slives.not assign a moral value like ‘good’ or ‘bad’ to our skin as we tend to internalise this kind of messaging and think of ourselves as ‘good’ or ‘bad’ as a result. Then we punish our skin when it really needs some love. If you have acne or another skin condition, your skin isn’t bad, it’s simply not functioning as well as it could be. I’d rather build towards being happy and healthy and that’s exactly what we’re going to do together. This is an edited extract from Your Best Skin by Hannah English published by Hardie Grant Books. RRP $29.99.

One Christmas, my aunt gifted me a copy of Don’t Go to the Cosmetic Counter Without Me by Paula Begoun. It changed my life.

Paula’s book got me excited about the science behind beauty and the development of skincare, and showed me that you can use your understanding of science and your skin to decide whether or not a product will work for you. In my years of trying and reviewing products, I can tell you that some people will love and get fabulous results from products that I hated on my own skin.

But… I’ve always loved beauty. I started wearing makeup at an early age—10 years old—and wanted to be a makeup artist even though people insisted ‘You’re too smart for beauty’. This is in itself a problem. There are many smart, hard-working scientists, business people and beauty therapists involved in the BIG business of beauty.

I’d always enjoyed and had a natural aptitude (or what we now know as ADHD hyperfocus) for science class, so it was a no-brainer to put my two favourite things together. After a couple of tries at university (studying media and then fashion styling), I decided to study science, intent on understanding the research behind beauty and what makes the ingredients do what they do. I chose Pharmaceutical Science because pharmacology is the study of our bodies and how different substances affect them, right down to the molecular level. Any substance that alters the function of a bodily process works like a drug, so it makes sense to learn about medical science and pharmacology to address the health of your skin.

These days, I use my science background and industry experience to try out products and assess skincare claims, to help cut through all of the buzzwords and more-more-more marketing, so we can all find our best skin. I consult on communications and product development for beauty brands, helping them choose ingredients and testing finished formulas on myself. I also review products for social media and publications, trying and comparing them and communicating how they interact with the skin (not just my own) in-depth.

Mypositively.experience facing the inability to walk and a very different life is that despairing and terrifying thoughts can be employed productively. If you are facing a significant transformation or sustained personal growth, it is extremely valuable to make repeat efforts, to keep trying time and time again. To chip away. To reassess and listen, then connect where you are to where you want to be using these deep personal drivers. This is how we engage our resolve to achieve difficult goals.

Emotions are effective I applied several strategies to keep me focussed on the next moment rather than dwelling on what had happened to me, or how bad the current moments felt. My default strategy was simply to act. I would listen carefully to the specialists and then consistently do the simplest things I needed to do. To move forward and to avoid any setbacks. When I felt overwhelmed I reverted to these small things. Again and again, driven by these deep emotions. Striving to sustain my identity. Any progress was good progress. I also embraced assistance. Gentle interventions from others can be crucial to help us appreciate the balance between our positive and negative thoughts. I am grateful

50 When life is suddenly disrupted, or we feel threatened, hurt, or pressured it triggers negative emotions to kick in like despair, self-doubt, and fear. This can cause malaise, lamentation and lethargy. Imagine if we could more consistently adapt these negative emotions to provide positive impetus. I believe we all do this often, mostly sub-consciously. I certainly did. In March 2019 I failed to make a corner whilst road cycling. My controlled crash decision flung me over the handlebars into a storm water drain. In hospital, I heard the words “spinal cord injury”, then underwent emergency stabilisation of my spine two parallel 23 centimetre rods to protect my crush fractured vertebrae. In a split second my life felt shattered. I experienced many negative emotions on that first morning and as I tackled a difficult recovery. I live with the consequences every day. Our deepest emotions are powerful Picture the oft-used iceberg graphic, where most of the substance is unseen. It is applied to our emotions for good reason. Our most powerful emotions, connected to our identity, are below the surface. They provide our strongest drivers when we need to engage sustained motivation. Because these thoughts and emotion are integrated with our identity, they have tremendous ability to grind away. To gnaw at us if negative, or to be our inner generator powering us forward, if we can apply them

• Know that you are not alone –people achieve exceptional things from imperfect positions every day.

51 that my wife and physios regularly helped me turn fear, guilt and despair into positive emotions during my recovery. My most powerful strategy was attaching reframed mantras to my negative thoughts. I was frightened and desperate about where I was, so I employed my emotional identity to make the idea of not improving more frightening and unpalatable. “I don’t want to be a burden to my family, so I must pursue improvement with all my might”.

Reframing provides sustained power When life has been disrupted, we are suddenly immersed in thoughts that help us, and thoughts that hinder us. We can’t deny these thoughts as they are deep emotions connected to our sense of self. They are incredibly powerful. My experience is that when a negative emotion is constraining or deflating us, the most effective, sustainable action is to reframe that thought into a positive action. By adapting these negative thoughts, using mantras, I harness my inner superpower.

• Use mantras – permanently associate a positive intent to the negative emotion.

• Embrace support – interventions change our awareness of our mindset and provide a platform to change our perspectives.

Reframing encourages me to sustain my recovery effort today, three years after my accident. My most consistent mantra happens when I am with my family. I can only walk about half the speed I used to, so invariably they will leave me steps, then metres, then tens of metres behind. It triggers the automatic negative thought “I hate not keeping up”. But I have coached myself to build that immediately into the positive: “how lucky am I to be walking with the chance to improve”. Mark Berridge is the author of A Fraction Stronger (Major Street, $32.99). It shares Mark’s pursuit of belief and possibility in impossible moments after a cycling crash and devastating spinal cord injury turned his world upside down. He speaks and writes about the influences that helped him tackle adversity, shaped in a way that allows readers to feel a fraction stronger too. Visit www.markberridge.com.au

• Mimic success – think about people that thrived in difficulty. Imagine the attitude they might have applied to manage their negative emotions.

• Take action – even the smallest steps can shift our perspectives on our circumstances.

• Celebrate action as well results – positive feedback reinvigorates effort and belief. Accept praise and give yourself credit for all helpful acts. Start by celebrating setting a mantra! 7 tips for harnessing negative emotions

• Visualise progress – shift your mindset from the present to where you might get to if you can just achieve this next step.

Lunch: 1 egg and slice of toast Snack: Milo drink, made per instructions

It is important to remember that deficiency can only be diagnosed by a GP, so if you think your child is deficient do make an appointment and hold off buying any supplementation until then. What you can do in the meantime is look for those iron rich food sources, team them with Vitamin C and gently encourage kids to eat them!

IRON DEFICIENCY IN CHILDREN

52 Iron deficiency, it’s common amongst adults and children in Australia. But I have to admit, as a nutritionist it wasn’t something I was actively thinking about often. I have spent so much time worrying about how many veggies my kids eat daily (which still isn’t a bad thing!) but rarely their iron intake. But just how common iron deficiency is and the effects this can have on kid’s behaviour and development was brought to my attention by a GP in a casual conversation. And the nutritionist in me went, oh of course! But the mother in me went, oh of course—great now what will my fussy three-year-old eat! When any of us become iron deficient we might find ourselves fatigued, unable to concentrate, a little dizzy, sometimes out of breath when exercising and with pale skin. When kids become iron deficient, they can have any of those symptoms but can also appear irritable and can show behavioural issues. And while your child may not be iron deficient, being aware of their iron needs may still help with their energy levels, growth and development. So how much iron do kids need? Babies 7-12 months need 11mg per day. 1 -3 years old need 9mg per day. 4-8 years old need 10mg per day. 9-13 years old need 8mg per day. And while that doesn’t sound like much, take a look at these high iron foods that most kids will actually eat and their iron content: 1 cup beef mince = 5mg 2 eggs = 1.6mg 2 Weetbix biscuits = 4.2mg 1 cup cooked wholemeal pasta = 2.3mg 100g tin tuna = 1.07mg ½ cup baked beans = 2.2mg

Dinner: Spaghetti Bolognaise sauce and Wholemeal Pasta

So how do you put it together to reach your child’s iron needs? Well, this is one example of a day on a plate for a 5 year old!

By Rachel Saunders, BMSc Nutrition, Build It balanced. Rachel believes everything in life should be about balance and in particular that our diets should be balanced. A balanced lifestyle and a balanced diet is healthy and most of all it’s www.builditbalanced.com.auenjoyable.

It’s also important to remember that haem iron (animal based) is absorbed more efficiently than non-haem (plant based) iron. However, cooking plant-based sources can also improve their iron absorption, and so too can Vitamin C, with the later also applying to haem iron sources. Meals such as spaghetti bolognaise are great for that reason, by adding tomatoes to a sauce with beef mince and serving with wholemeal pasta. Other ways to include vitamin C with iron sources include serving strawberries or raspberries with Weetbix or cooking baked beans with a can of tomatoes.

Breakfast: 2 Weetbix with milk

See www.mamamag.com.au/competitions for terms and conditions. Parent’s email will be added to our monthly MamaMail. You can opt out at any time. Post to: MamaMag Movie Comp, PO Box 8018, North Road LPO, Brighton East 3187 by Sept 15th. Download colouring in sheet here WIN A hard-on-his-luck hound Hank (Michael Cera) finds himself in a town full of cats who need a hero to defend them from a ruthless villain’s (Ricky Gervais) evil plot to wipe their village off the map. With help from a reluctant teacher (Samuel L. Jackson) to train him, our underdog must assume the role of town samurai and team up with the villagers to save the day. The only problem… cats hate dogs! Each movie pack from Paramount Pictures includes 1 Movie family pass, 1 Paws of Fury puzzle and 1 Paws of Fury kids t-shirt! Simply Colour to WIN! WIN 1 of 5 Paws of Fury The Legend of Hank movie packs eachWorth$95

EATINGFUSSY

When starting solids, feeding babies may seem fun… but for many parents, mealtimes can soon become a battlefield wrought with stress, anxiety and lots of wasted food! Even the best eaters can suddenly become fussy as they reach toddlerhood and learn that they can have an opinion about what they will and won’t eat! In one study, the percentage of children identified as picky eaters by their caregivers increased from 19% to 50% from While fussy eating is normal and common, there are things you can do to make mealtimes less stressful and bring the fun back to food!

Focus on what’s in your control

We as parents are responsible for what and when we feed may be the optimal window

Like all child development, learning to eat is a skill that takes time and practice. As parents, there are a number of things you can do to best support your child along the learning process and help them establish a healthy

Serve a “safe” food with every meal This is a food that you know that your toddler will eat (like rice, fruit or bread). Include this safe and familiar food together with the new or less favoured foods you are exposing them to. Even if they will likely refuse the other food you’ve put on the plate, still serve it (without pressuring them to eat it).

Drop the guilt There will be days when our kids will hardly eat or we may lose our cool. That’s ok! Just as our children are learning, we as parents are learning too. Maybe all they ate today was fish nuggets and chips and there wasn’t a vegetable in sight. That’s OK too! Did you know, a child’s body absorbs nutrients over a one to two-week period?! So, take the pressure off yourself (and them!) and aim for variety and balance over the week instead of a perfectly balanced plate every single meal!

By Dr Rachel Cohen PhD, Clinical Psychologist and founder of High Chair Catchy. highchaircatchy.com

Eat together as much as possible When it comes to most things parenting, children learn more from what they see you do, than what they hear you say. The best way to encourage a fussy eater to try new foods is for them to see you eating it yourself. Family meals are an opportune time to model healthy eating and enjoyment of a diverse range of foods. Provide repeated exposure to new foods Often parents offer a new food only a handful of times before quickly deciding their child doesn’t like that food and excluding it from future meals. Researchers have found that preschool-aged children tend to require up to 15 exposures to a new food before they “trust” it and even taste it. So, don’t just write off a food because they refused it the first time (or the 10th time)! Keep it in the repertoire.wiping your face when you spilled, correcting how you used your spoon or fretting about the mess you were making. Doesn’t sound so fun, does it? Instead, letting our kids make mess while they learn to feed themselves is crucial to setting up positive associations with food and eating. Using a food catcher helps parents embrace the mess without stressing about the clean up after or wasted food! mealtimes) with food helps them get used to new textures. Handling and touching new foods without pressure to eat them will help your toddler become familiar with new foods, get used to different textures and make them more likely to try them in the future. Let them get involved in food preparation and cooking, do sensory play activities with different textured foods, and present food in playful

55 If your toddler knows that if they refuse dinner and can get whatever snack they want 10 minutes later, they’ll keep doing it… Many parents fall into this trap of becoming a restaurant with a never-ending menu of options! Instead let them know what’s on offer for dinner that night and don’t offer alternatives when they refuse. Remember if you’ve included a safe food in the meal you know they will eat if they’re hungry. If they don’t eat anything, that’s OK too. This may not go smoothly the first few times, but if you stay steadfast in this approach they’ll understand very quickly that the kitchen is closed and get with the program.

Keep a routine Make sure you’re feeding them at their best—toddlers don’t eat well if they become over hungry or overtired. Try to keep a daily routine of 3 meals and 2-3 snacks around your toddler’s sleeping pattern instead of continuous snacking throughout the day.

Rip Curl Dawn Patrol 3mm Glove RRP $49.99

Toasty Life Ultra Warm Fleece Lined Weatherproof Jacket RRP $289.00

This outdoor changing robe is key to get ting warm fast. Buy a size up so that you can change whilst inside it and you’ll thank your lucky stars! Its thick, soft, moisture wicking fleece acts as a blanket to keep your core warm and dry even during the coldest months.

Here are a few things you’ll need to get your natural high, have fun and stay safe!!

Itiwit Waterproof Large Phone Pouch RRP $15.00

No we’re not mad. It’s crazy how much easier it is to get in amongst the cold waves if your hands are warm! These cold water surfing and swimming gloves are designed for even the chilliest of mornings and are, in my opin ion, more important than a hood!

Adrenalin Women’s Wahine Long Sleeve Suit RRP $159.99

You’d not be too far off thinking almost everyone is cold water dipping these days! Over the past couple of years, throwing yourself into bracing waters has been on the rise and now there are an enormous amount of people reducing their stress levels and boosting their immune systems (and their libido) by taking the plunge! As winter starts to disappear and the warmer Spring mornings approach, perhaps it’s finally time for you to give it a go. Whilst cold water dipping is fun, it’s important that you take it seriously and understand ex actly what you need to be safe. Hypothermia is a real risk and beginners should only dip in cold, open waters for very short periods of time and ensure they have the correct acces sories to warm back up afterwards.

It’s about time you started Cold Water Dipping isn’t it? By Liv Wilson

What’s the point in dipping if there’s no ev idence you did it right? You’ll be so glad you invested in one of these when you’re bobbing around in the waves. Speedo Long Hair Cap RRP $17 If you’ve got long hair and you’re considering daily dipping, this cap will be your new best friend. Not only does it keep your luscious locks bone dry and salt free, it also acts as an other layer under a beanie and stops the wind getting to your ears!! (You’re welcome.)

Body Glove Heavy Duty Dry Bag RRP$39.99 You can just as easily use a ‘bag for life’ but hey, if you want to look the part then these dry bags are awesome. Pop all your things inside and they’re guaranteed to keep your towel and clothes dry whilst you’re busy getting wet!

If you think you’ll need a wetty (not everyone does), this super stretchy and lightweight suit is perfect for swimming and dipping, provid ing protection and warmth without restricting your movement. Awesome because a bit of floundering around is a must!

Top tip: Wool is best for getting warm, so invest in a good woolly hat, thick woolly socks and a great pair of gloves.

Kmart 1.5L Vacuum Flask RRP $21.00 A flask full of warm tea or hot coffee will be the icing on the cake whilst you’re sitting waterside post dip. Filling the flask with clean warm water is also handy to pour over very cold toes. **Make sure it’s tepid and not hot otherwise you may burn yourself!

Target Women’s Sidney II Slipper Boots RRP $20 Covering your cold toes in talcum powder and sliding them into warm fur lined boots will be a pleasure like no other on cold days! Choose a size bigger so you can add chunky woolly socks too. The key to keeping safe is to limit the time you spend in the water until you have acclima tized and get dry and dressed quickly when you get out. Now, go out there and wrap your self in those gorgeous salty waves!

“As a first time mum, I remember all too well, the fear that grappled me as I wanted to cocoon my newborn and protect him from the world around him.”

Welcoming a new baby into the world is one of life’s greatest experiences. From feeling those first few kicks, to setting up a nursery and to buying your first pram - planning for your new baby to arrive into the world can be very exciting, but it can also be daunting. Particularly when it comes to protecting your child, and family as a whole, against illness. One of the best ways to ensure your child is as protected as possible is through vaccinations, but the understandable reality given the past few years is that some parents are anxious about doing this. In fact, new research from Amcal revealed that almost one in four Australian parents feel anxious about getting their family vaccinated^. This is a feeling that mum and paediatrician, Sarah Arachchi, can relate to...

It’s particularly important for all visitors to be vaccinated against whooping cough, which can be deadly to newborns until they’re vaccinated themselves, plus flu and COVID-19,” Angela said. Asking friends and family to be up-to-date with their vaccinations can be intimidating but, as the protector of your children, Sarah says that others should respect your decisions and understand that it’s your job to be their voice. “You should be able to choose who can visit your newborn baby and place some guidelines around visitors as a newborn baby generally has a weaker immune system and most reasonable people will understand and appreciate this. This may mean waiting

When it comes to coping with the anxiety of vaccinations, the best thing you can do is to be prepared. Understanding what vaccinations you and your children need to get is a great way to do this but according to Amcal’s research, almost half of Aussie parents don’t know what vaccinations their children need to get and when^.

“I remember my newborn’s first vaccinations and holding him tight as he let out a loud squeal as the needle went in. It hurt in my heart when he cried and I wished there was another way but I knew that the vaccinations would protect him.”

Amcal pharmacist, Angela Boyatzis, says that vaccinations are something parents need to start thinking about from the moment they conceive. “Planning for bubs vaccinations should start before they have even arrived. If you’re planning a pregnancy, you should check that you’re up-to-date with all your routine and seasonal vaccinations. During pregnancy, the Australian Department of Health advises you receive both the flu and whooping cough vaccinations as well as COVID-19 vaccinations. That’s because infants under six months are too young to receive the flu vaccination, so the best way to protect your newborn before then is to receive a flu vaccination during pregnancy.” And it’s not just mum who needs to consider vaccinations before bub’s arrival…

VACCINATION 101

“One of the most important steps in keeping your baby protected is ensuring that anyone who will be around them as a newborn is also up-to-date with their vaccinations. This includes other parents, grandparents, family, and friends – the sky’s the limit!

3. Thirdly, I usually tell my kids that the needle will sting. A lot of the time, we say “It won’t hurt”, but we all know that injections sting and can be painful. It’s important to be honest with kids as it helps to develop trust.

^Research conducted among 1,025 Australian adults by the Online Research Unit in March 2022, commissioned by Amcal www.amcal.com.au/vaccinationsPharmacy.

1. Firstly, it is a great idea to talk to your child about the vaccine beforehand and how it will help to protect them (like a superpower).

2. Secondly, taking a second parent or grandparent in can be super useful in case your child becomes distressed or scared.

“Probably the biggest misconception we see from parents and patients alike is that if we experience aches or pains as response to the vaccination, we think we have got the ‘disease’ we are being vaccinated against, whereas it’s actually just a sign that our immune system is responding to the vaccination as hoped! These side effects are typical of many vaccines and usually resolve within two days,”

Angela says that misconceptions about vaccinations can cause parents to feel apprehensive about routine children’s vaccinations but it’s important to remember that they are proven to be one of the safest and most effective public health interventions in history.

As children are now requiring more vaccinations due to COVID-19 and influenza, we know that dealing with their fears can be difficult but after many years of coaching parents through these experiences and as a mum herself, Sarah has some helpful tips for making it through.

4. Finally, during the actual injection, sit them on your knee as it helps to give cuddles afterwards and use lots of distraction (yes this is the one time where an episode of Bluey is useful!). A lollipop or reward afterwards is also a great idea.”

59 a bit longer before taking your newborn out to a large gathering or choosing outdoor events that are less crowded.”

When it comes to getting children vaccinated themselves, it’s not surprising that many children (and parents themselves) can experience some fear and stress.

Over the course of our lives, experiencing a loss becomes inevitable. We will all go through the pain of losing someone or something we love and cherish. While the pain of some losses are easier to process others can feel overwhelming. Either way, self-care practices offer a safe environment where the loss can be explored on an emotional and spiritual level.

Keeping a loss journal provides a space for reflection and soul-searching without judgement. Choose a notebook and pens you want to use for your journal. It is helpful to set a specific day and time in the week or month for journaling. Choose a space where you feel comfortable and can spend some time writing without any distractions. If writing seems daunting, try doodling, using collage, stickers and photos to capture your thoughts and feelings.

It is a well-known fact that spending time in nature reduces stress, anxiety and uplifts emotional well-being. When you feel overwhelmed, take a break and seek a peaceful moment in nature. Take a companion with you if you feel more comfortable having someone with you. Before you start, set your intention. As you walk, allow yourself to connect with the tranquillity and the beauty which surround you. Dedicate this time to your healing.

4. Dance When the sorrow you feel is too heavy and you feel stuck, dance. Dancing is an effective way to allow the grief to move through your body. Put your favourite music on and follow the beat. Dance until you feel your mood has lifted and you feel more relaxed.

5. End the day with a grateful heart Days often feel endless and are hard to get through following a loss. Before you go to sleep at night, find one thing you are grateful for. It can be the little things which often go unnoticed. By practising gratefulness you build resilience which in turn helps you move forward.

5 self-care practices to help you move through loss

Experiencing a loss is heart-breaking and the grief which comes with it is often heavy. It may be difficult to process the various emotions you are feeling and the uphill road towards healing may seem hard. However, with the right tools finding healing, inner peace and having the strength to move forward after a loss is possible. A self-care practice is the perfect tool when it comes to healing from deep sorrow. Such practice when performed with no judgement and self-compassion creates a cocoon around you where you can explore the loss without reliving the actual loss. This is because a self-care practice has a clear beginning and a clear ending making exploring emotions, feelings and needs within this setting safe. When you engage in a self-care practice you are saying a big yes to taking care of yourself and your needs. It creates space for you to gain the clarity you are seeking and the inner peace your heart is longing for. Let’s take a look at 5 self-care practices to help you move through the healing process:

2. Keep a loss journal

1. Take a walk in nature

3. Relaxation Plan time for relaxation during your day. Create a cosy space at home where you can fully relax. Try this simple 5-minute relaxation: While seated comfortably, gently close your eyes and take a few breaths. When you are ready, place both hands on your heart space and continue to breathe gently. Connect with your breath, the here and now and allow your body to soften with each breath. As your body relaxes so does your mind. After the 5 minutes, you should feel energized as well as calm.

60 THE ART OF GRIEVING

2. Celebrate your loved one’s birthday If you love the outdoors, you can organise a day out in nature to celebrate your loved one’s birthday. Choose your loved one’s favourite spot and make it a special day filled with their favourite things and add your unique touch. Another simple way is to bake a cake and share it with close friends and family. You can say a few words to toast this day.

3. Cook your loved one’s favourite meal on special occasions This is a touching way to honour your loved one on special occasions. Including things like favourite recipes, foods and drinks revive fond memories and bring joy.

5. Donate in your loved one’s name Choose a charity which is close to yours or your loved one’s heart and make a donation in your loved one’s name. Fundraising for a special event such as a 5km fun run or marathon is a great way to honour your loved one. Ask friends and family to get involve and make it an annual event. Keeping your loved one’s memory alive is not just about the things you do. It is all about intention, connection and a whole lot of love. Here’s 5 meaningful ways to keep your loved one’s memory alive:

1. Create new traditions around the holidays Holiday seasons can be tough and this is where your loved one’s absence will be felt the most. The beauty about creating new traditions is that you are free to design something which holds special meaning for you. The possibilities are endless from starting the celebrations with a remembrance dinner, play their favourite music, light a candle or fill your home with flowers. Follow your heart and your intuition.

Corinne Laan is the author of The Art of Grieving: Gentle self-care practices to heal a broken heart (Rockpool Publishing, $29.95).

Now available where all good books are sold and online at rockpoolpublishing.co Life although forever changed does not mean a life filled with sadness. You can still bring a spark of joy into your life by keeping your loved one’s memory alive. It is a beautiful way to honour the life and the love you shared. Creating new traditions and rituals not only help you heal your broken heart but it can inspire you in building a life with a brand-new purpose and new meaning.

4. Grow a remembrance garden If you have an outdoor space you can grow a remembrance garden in a small dedicated section. Choose flowers and plants you love. Before you start, set your intention and consciously dedicate this space to your loved one’s memory. Tending to the garden is a symbolic gesture. As you take care of the garden you are tending to the love which still flows between you both. If you do not have a garden, a balcony or small corner with potted plants work well too.

Two failed ShoulderFailedEpisiotomy…ventouse…forceps…dystociausing all five of the different manual manoeuvres to get him out, the last one being that unbearable pain I had felt having no pain relief and two hands inside me to dislodge his shoulder from my pelvis. Recovery was hard. I needed so much healing and recovery. I didn’t realise this.

How could I have gone from a chilled hypnobirthing labour, drug free and in my happy zone with my mum and husband at home, to…

Lying on my back in stirrups…

The most pain I had felt since the contractions started and I’d never felt anything like it. This wasn’t my body now; this was something happening to me out of my control. This wasn’t labour. It went away briefly when he arrived… “It’s a boy” my husband said. I had a few minutes of skin to skin before he was taken away from me and the midwife was pressing down hard on my already beaten upper stomach. “James, get her off me, what’s going on?” I remember asking my husband and looking at the fear in his eyes. “She can’t, she needs to do this”. The bars were suddenly up on the bed and more people arrived in the room asking me to sign paperwork. I saw bags of blood around me. I was wheeled away leaving James with our new baby in a room on his own. I woke about 4hrs later in an empty ward with two women looking at me from behind a Afterdesk.Ihad been wheeled back to be with my family I found out I had haemorrhaged two litres of blood.

It makes sense now. I had lost so much blood and my son (we named him Montgomery, aka Monty) wasn’t getting enough milk from me. TRAUMA

MY BIRTH

63 ” “

I’m still left with trauma, every time I look at pictures of Monty in the first year of life, or when I talk about my story. It seems to be more prominent now I am pregnant, but I have hopes of healing. I am seeing a perinatal psychologist who specialises in trauma. Life’s too short to give up and don’t let anyone say to you ‘It’s happened, put it in the past”. If you still live it now, it’s not in the past and you deserve support. Ask for help! I don’t want my first birth to be carried on to my second. I share my story to help other mums believe that no matter what body you’re left with after birth, what trauma you have experienced, you can get back to being strong mentally and physically again, even stronger than before babies. You can do anything you want, even trampolining.

If you experienced trauma, here are some people who could help: No one had told me that milk was converted from blood so if I was depleted, there may be issues with breastfeeding. I struggled to connect with Monty for a long time. Was it normal not to be totally in love with my son? I just wanted to sleep and couldn’t understand why he was crying all the time and wanted me to hold him constantly.

COPE cope.org.au PANDA panda.org.au

By Lara Jezepn, a Brit living in Brighton, South Australia with her husband and little boy Monty. Lara runs VirtualPT and is empowering mums to love their body, have great poos and to never have their organs fall out their vagina. I share my story to help other mums believe that no matter what body you’re left with after birth, what trauma you have experienced, you can get back to being strong mentally and physically again, even stronger than before babies. You can do anything you want, even trampolining.

OK so this all sounds pretty horrendous and I wanted to paint a picture to explain how someone could go from this, to now.

Now I don’t leak at all and have learnt to adjust my lifestyle to suit my new body—no bouncing on a trampoline but I never did that anyway. I’m still nervous to run but I am being fitted for a pessary by my pelvic floor physio so I have hopes for a run and testing out a trampoline with my son very soon. I love my body. It’s stronger than it was before I had Monty. I’ve learnt so much on this 3-year journey and now I’m planning to do it again.

Centre for Perinatal Psychology centreforperinatalpsychology.com.au

How was this my new life! Things got worse when my mum left after two weeks to head back to the UK. Living in a different country, away from all my family meant it was just James, Monty and I to figure this all out. And I didn’t know I needed help. I didn’t know this wasn’t just baby blues. I didn’t know I was anaemic. I didn’t know my night sweats meant I had a severe breast abscess that needed to be syringed at emergency. On top of this I was left with a 3C degree tear, an elevator avulsion (muscle hanging off the pubic bone) and fearing doing a poo in case I ripped apart. I would go for a short walk and leak. It did get better, eventually I would only leak when I sneezed or coughed and there was no way I could run again.

Adelaide Perinatal Psychology location/adelaidecentreforperinatalpsychology.com.au/ Australasian Birth Trauma Association birthtrauma.org.au

64 1-30 Sept 2022 Go all in for kidssick There’s never been a better reason to get on your bike this September. We’ve all recently experienced periods of uncertainty and social isolation, but seriously ill children face this every day. Starlight helps sick kids forget they’re sick for a while and re-discover the joy of childhood. Join thousands of cyclists across the country and ride the distance for sick kids. Scan the QR code to involvedget ride.tourdekids.org.au click to involved!get

Melbourne MamaMag Aug/Sept 2022

Articles inside

Vaccination 101

Cold water dipping

Fussy eating

WIN 1 of 5 Paws of Fury movie packs

Find your best skin

Busting common oral health myths

Taming negative emotions

Iron deficiency in children

Equitable egg freezing

Identity after motherhood

Smooth shaving

Fostering care

At your local pharmacy

Collagen

I’m sorry, what?

Perfect pouts

More fish, more veg

How to remember you dreams

Pelvic floor perils

KIC’ing goals