Friends
T
My Best Friend’s Getting Married.
Now What?
She’s there with wine after a bad day and knows you better than your own mother. But what happens when your best friend commits to another soulmate? Katie Mulloy finds out
his is the sort of friend Kirsty is. She’s the one who, when we were both too hungover to speak, dragged herself to the shop to get the only thing that could save us (Kettle Chips). During one freezing festival camping expedition, she doled out her own body warmth by voluntarily spooning me until I eventually stopped shivering. She doesn’t even comment when I turn up for drinks wearing an outfit consisting entirely of items stolen from her. She is, without fuss or expectation, my rock. I love her and I want only happiness and wonderful things for her. So last June, when she rang me – I was about third on the list behind her mother and someone I’m now jealous of – to tell me her brilliant boyfriend, Tom, had just proposed, I was genuinely thrilled for her. Even more thrilled when she asked me to be bridesmaid. So why now, as the wedding creeps closer and it dawns, perhaps on both of us, that this is not just a brilliant excuse for a party, do I feel a bit... funny? There is a fear that’s whispering away at me, saying: this is it. This is the end of something. And it won’t ever be the same again. It is not about jealousy or disappointment with where my own life is at; I’m truly happy – I have a good job, great friends and a boyfriend whom I love and live with and believe I’ll be with forever. It is, I suppose, a dread that my beautiful, brilliant friend – and our beautiful, brilliant friendship – will somehow change when she is somebody’s wife. I’d feel more ashamed of my own terrible selfishness if this wasn’t such an apparently universal feeling that Hollywood has made a film about it. New release Bridesmaids sees thirtysomething Annie (Kristen Wiig) go into meltdown in the run up to best friend Lillian’s (Maya Rudolph) wedding. For the majority of the film, Annie grapples with the idea that Lillian, her lifelong ally, is moving on to that next life stage without her, that the looming marriage will be a permanent partition between them. And yes, though clearly mental, I know where she’s coming from. Because there is something different about being married. It’s palpable. They’ll even tell you as much. ‘Oh, I really didn’t expect it to, but