April 2015
INSIDE:
THE SECRET OF EMPLOYEE ENGAGEMENT
ELITE
LEADERSHIP DEVELOPMENT ELITE DEVELOPMENT FOR ELITE LEADERS
THE ESSENTIAL LEADERSHIP VALUES INSPIRATIONAL LESSONS FROM MIYAMOTO MUSASHI WHAT'S HOLDING YOU BACK?
⭐ ️ TOP TIPS FOR EFFECTIVE MEETINGS ⭐ ️ WHY DO WE AVOID CONFLICT.⭐ ️
CONTENTS
ISSUE ONE
1 EDITORIAL 10 TOP TIPS:
EFFECTIVE MEETINGS
3 WHAT'S HOLDING YOU BACK?
There are many barriers standing between you and your dreams but how many of those barriers are real and how many are just imagined?
5 INSPIRATIONAL
The author Dave Barry once wrote “If you had to identify, in one word why the human race has not achieved and never will achieve its full potential, that word be “Meetings
17 THE ESSENTIAL
LEADERSHIP VALUES Leadership is the ability to instil power and belief into individuals and teams in order for them to reach levels they didn’t realise could be possible. Learn the key essential values that make this possible.
13 QUOTES OF THE
20 SUCCESS COACHING
14 THE SECRET OF
21 WHY DO WE AVOID
MONTH
EMPLOYEE ENGAGEMENT
High employee engagement is the LESSONS FROM "Holy Grail" of MIYAMOTO MUSASHI leadership. Many leaders struggle to create that connection Miyamoto Musashi between the team and lived a life the organisation but unimaginable today. what is the secret? He was the greatest Samurai of all time, victor in over sixty duels. Be inspired by some of his greatest quotes
CONFLICT?
People find conflict difficult and will sometimes go through great lengths in order to avoid it or they get themselves so worked up that by the time they deal with the conflict it’s escalated into something much bigger than it originally was.Why does this happen why do people tend to avoid conflict?
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www.EliteLD.co.nz
Welcome to Elite Leadership Development Magazine EDITOR Mark Wager mark@EliteLD.co.nz
ADVERTISING ENQUIRIES sales@EliteLD.co.nz
COVER IMAGE Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net
COACHING ENQUIRIES coaching@EliteLD.co.nz
IMAGES BY Stuart Miles David Castillo Dominici vectorolie Jeroen van Oostrom
I saw a video of the President of the UFC, Dana White delivering a talk at the CSN Elite Business Series. During the talk Dana spoke about how life is short, even though we don't think it is. He mentioned that he felt that the secret of happiness was finding your passion in life, the one thing you would get up in the morning and do for free. Once you find that passion then find a way to make money out of it, that way you will never work a day in your life. My passion is leadership. I deliver Team Building and Leadership Coaching in New Zealand and the Pacific. This is my passion, this is my life Not only do I want to be the best leader I can be but also want to help as many people as possible become elite leaders. This new magazine you have in front of you is one of the ways I hope will supply people with inspirational as well as some practical skills to help them in the workplace and in their private lives. Thank you for downloading this magazine and I hope you find it interesting. If you do, feel free to email me mark@EliteLD.co.nz or connect on Twitter mark_wager Thanks,
at FreeDigitalPhotos.net All material appearing in Elite leadership is copyright material and cannot be reproduced without prior permission of the publisher.
Mark
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What's Holding You Back? By Mark Wager
When I was a child I visited the circus. I believe I was around ten years old and I lived in the middle of Birmingham where the only animals I ever saw were cats, dogs and the occasional fox. So the news of the circus coming to town was exciting. I was eager and most excited to see an elephant in real life. I watched the old Tarzan movies in which Tarzan used to ride an elephant around the jungle. On the day the circus arrived I was filled with excitement. The clowns were funny, the lions were scary and the trapeze artists were exciting but I was waiting for the elephants. The time finally came as the elephants were guided out into the circus ring. I noticed that they were much bigger than I expected. They seemed such powerful creatures. As they reached the middle of the circus ring I noticed each elephant had a foot secured to a small stake that stuck to the ground. When I asked my father about this he told me that this was for our protection so that the elephant
wouldn’t run away. I looked at him in a curious manner as I thought that the small rope would barely keep me, a ten year old boy in order let alone a giant powerful creature like an elephant. My father saw my quizzical look and explained that at an early age an elephant was tied to a rope so they wouldn’t escape. They tried and tried but they couldn’t move until they just accepted their fate. So then as adults they were programmed to believe that the rope was unbreakable so they wouldn’t attempt to break it. I was always in awe of elephants so when I heard this, my excitement turned to sadness and I asked to leave. From memory, I think I said that I had too much popcorn and I was feeling sick but it was something else that bothered with me. Since that day I’ve never visited a circus again. When I look back now I realise that the elephant was not alone. We may be sharing the same fate? ISSUE ONE | www.EliteLD.co.nz | Page 3
How many of us have the potential to do something more than we are doing yet we are being held back by our own version of the stake in the ground. How many of us are missing out on a better job, a better home or a better life because of something that we have been programmed to believe is able to hold us back. How did we fall into this trap of being mentality conditioned to fail and more importantly how can we escape form our very own circus? The inner conversations we have every day determines just how much we are bound by our limitations. The elephant was only bound by the rope around its leg because the elephant believed he couldn’t escape. It’s the same with us and our thoughts. Our sub-conscious has difficulty differentiating between actual reality and vivid thoughts. In fact research showed that the neuro-receptors in our brains react in exactly the same way. Now we have numerous inner conversations with ourselves and if you doubt me just ask yourself what you are doing right now. The chances are that you are having an inner conversation about what you think about this article and whether you should continue reading. We talk to ourselves constantly and if those thoughts are negative or even if they are reinforcing the current state then our subconscious treats them as reality and as a result we act in a way that reinforces that reality. As an example if a person has applied for promotion and they tell themselves that they are not going to get the job, because they are not smart enough or don’t have enough experience, they listen to their own inner thoughts and they believe those thoughts. The sub-conscious then acts in a way that reinforces the reality that they are not good enough for that promotion. You can guess what happens at interview. They act nervous and unsure of themselves so what does the panel think? They see someone unsure of themselves and conclude that the person is not experienced or ready for promotion which in itself reinforces the view that the person
had of themselves. Therefore the metaphorical rope is tied tighter around their leg. Belief becomes reality. If you don’t believe you will succeed then the reality is you won’t succeed. How do we break this magic spell? The key is to know which ropes are only keeping you in place because you believe them to be and which ropes are actually your limitations. We all have limitations but far further then we can imagine. I would love to play football for England at the world cup but the reality is that I’m 42 and can barely kick a ball so that particular rope is a clear barrier and no matter how much I believe in myself I’m never going to be good enough to play professional football. Yet there have been many barriers in my life that I have found to be imaginary. At the age of five I was told that I would never be able to talk properly yet today I make a living by going to companies to talk. At the age of 18 I was told that I would never become a Manager in retail yet one year later I was the youngest manager in a company of over 150 Managers nationwide. At the age of 23 I was told a retail manager would never be able to work in a London Finance House, yet within a couple of years not only did I work for a London Finance House but I had become a Broker Sales Manager there. I was told I would never publish a book and not only have I published a book but here I am now receiving emails and tweets from people all around the world who have read my book. I was told I would never have my own business and yet again I proved them wrong. Each and every single one of these barriers were proven to be false. If I believed just one of them then my life would have taken a very different direction and I wouldn’t be where I am now. To be honest there may well be more barriers in my life, more ropes that I haven’t tested. Well I guess I need to find out and I suggest you do the same.
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“You must understand that there is more than one path to the top of the mountain”
Miyamoto Musashi, born in 1584 in Harima province Japan, is widely regarding as one of the greatest warriors in history. Miyamoto was a Ronin, a masterless samurai who travelled across Japan to find the greatest warriors in their discipline in order to fight them in a duel. Legends have it that Miyamoto Musashi fought and won his first duel at the age of thirteen and would go on to fight over sixty duels, undefeated in his lifetime. During his later years Miyamoto Musashi would go on to write a book entitled “The Book of Five Rings” in which he takes a philosophical approach to fighting. While this may not seem like the most likely source of inspiration, never forget that each of us at some time are fighting something, whether it be a person, an obstacle or even ourselves, we are always facing something that we have to overcome. So take a few minutes to read some quotes from the greatest fighter of all time. ISSUE ONE | www.EliteLD.co.nz | Page 5
“Today is victory over yourself of yesterday; tomorrow is your victory over lesser men."
“Think lightly of yourself and deeply of the world” “You must understand that there is more than one path to the top of the mountain” "Do nothing that is of no use” “Get beyond love and grief: exist for the good of Man.” “Perceive that which cannot be seen with the eye.”
“If you wish to control others you must first control yourself”
“If you do not control the enemy, the enemy will control you”
“The ultimate aim of martial arts is not having to use them”
“Do not sleep under a roof. Carry no money or food. Go alone to places frightening to the common brand of men. Become a criminal of purpose. Be put in jail, and extricate yourself by your own wisdom.”
“It is difficult to understand the universe if you only study one planet” “You can only fight the way you practice” “Do not regret what you have done”
“Today is victory over yourself of yesterday; tomorrow is your victory over lesser men.” ISSUE ONE | www.EliteLD.co.nz | Page 6
“There is no one way to salvation, whatever the manner in which a man may proceed. All forms and variations are governed by the eternal intelligence of the Universe that enables a man to approach perfection. It may be in the arts of music and painting or it may be in commerce, law, or medicine. It may be in the study of war or the study of peace. Each is as important as any other. Spiritual enlightenment through religious meditation such as Zen or in any other way is as viable and functional as any "Way."... A person should study as they see fit.
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“The true science of martial arts means practicing them in such a way that they will be useful at any time, and to teach them in such a way that they will be useful in all things.” “You may abandon your own body but you must preserve your honour.” “The only reason a warrior is alive is to fight, and the only reason a warrior fights is to win” “To become the enemy, see yourself as the enemy of the enemy” “Know your enemy, know his sword.” “To know ten thousand things, know one well” “It is difficult to realize the true Way just through sword-fencing. Know the smallest things and the biggest things, the shallowest things and the deepest things.” “No man is invincible, and therefore no man can fully understand that which would make him invincible” “The important thing in strategy is to suppress the enemy's useful actions but allow his useless actions” “When you decide to attack, keep calm and dash in quickly, forestalling the enemy...attack with a feeling of constantly crushing the enemy, from first to last.”
“Never stray from the Way.” “When in a fight to the death, one wants to employ all one's weapons to the utmost. I must say that to die with one's sword still sheathed is most regrettable.” “Whatever the Way, the master of strategy does not appear fast.” “It is said the warrior's is the twofold Way of pen and sword, and he should have a taste for both Ways. Even if a man has no natural ability he can be a warrior by sticking assiduously to both divisions of the Way.” “In the construction of houses, choice of woods is made. Straight un-knotted timber of good appearance is used for the revealed pillars, straight timber with small defects is used for the inner pillars. Timbers of the finest appearance, even if a little weak, is used for the thresholds, lintels, doors, and sliding doors, and so on. Good strong timber, though it be gnarled and knotted, can always be used discreetly in construction.” “When your spirit is not in the least clouded, when the clouds of bewilderment clear away, there is the true void.” “There is nothing outside of yourself that can ever enable you to get better, stronger, richer, quicker, or smarter. Everything is within. Everything exists. Seek nothing outside of yourself.”
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Top Tips: Effective Meetings Every month we will look at some practical tips to help Managers in every situation
How many times have you heard people say at the end of the day “I got nothing done I was at meetings all day." The author Dave Barry once wrote “If you had to identify, in one word why the human race has not achieved and never will achieve its full potential, that word be “Meetings” Nowadays you just need to mention the
word "meeting" and you can hear people groan. Yet holding a meeting is still one of the most effective tools that a Manager has in his leadership tool kit. The problem is that holding a meeting has become a default mechanism for a lot of Managers. It's something that they do because they know they should do it instead of knowing why they should do it.
Here are some practical tips to help make your meetings and ultimately your business more productive.
“Nowadays you just need to mention the word "meeting" and you can hear people groan”
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Tip 1: Ask yourself, do you actually need a meeting? This may seem basic but you need to remind yourself that meetings should only be held for one of two reasons. The first reason for a meeting is to make a decision; the second reason is that it is the most effective way of sharing information. It’s the second reason that causes more problems than the first because a lot of Managers view a meeting as the only way to share information. How many regularly scheduled meetings have you gone to where the facilitator is struggling for content so the time is filled by non-essential items? Ask yourself, what is the most effective way of communicating a message? Can you do this via email or a phone call? Meetings should be used when you are communicating a message so important that it requires the benefits of face-to face interaction (tone of voice, body language) in order to make sure it is understood. Tip 2: Make the purpose of the meeting clear. I’ve been to many meetings where I had no idea of the purpose of the meeting even before I walked into the room and unfortunately this is not an isolated incident. Make people aware so that they can prepare, if the purpose of the meeting is to decide something then supply as much information as possible so that any debate can be well informed and constructive. In this way not only will your meeting take less time but will result in better decisions.
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Tip 3: Start on time Make sure everyone knows that if you went through the effort of putting together a meeting then its serious work and needs to start on time. If people are late then start without them. They can catch-up and are unlikely to be late to the next meeting. Tip 4: Stay on track The key to an effective meeting is having everyone focused on the current discussion point. The best way to keep everyone on track is by summarising what has been discussed, where you are at and what’s next. Use phrases such as “We’ve agreed on...” “Let’s see where we are at...” “We are left with the issue of...” Tip 5: Ensure everyone contributes Not everyone contributes equally at meetings. It's not always possible because a person can’t contribute a lot of time while feeling restricted by the way the meeting is facilitated. Not everyone processes information and communicates in the same way. Introverts will generally process their thoughts internally and will not communicate those thoughts until they are carefully considered. So in order to encourage participation ensure that everyone has had a chance to comment before moving onto the next topic.
Tip 6: No meeting should go beyond 45 minutes If you are unable to do everything you need to do within a 45 minute meeting then you are doing it wrong. Even the best of people have a limited attention span so in order to have an effective meeting you need all the participants to be mentally present and focused. Keep meetings to a maximum of 45 minutes and you will be surprised with the results. Tip 7: Send a summary after the meeting After every meeting I send the participants an email which summarises the main points and highlights any action points required. I also include further reading that either goes into far more detail on a topic we discussed or provides further background information. It’s worthwhile drafting the email before you start the meeting as this enables you to use it as a draft agenda as well as saving you time afterwards. Try these tips and you will find that people at the end of the day will feel that they have done a lot of work because meetings helped rather than hindered.
Make sure everyone knows that if you went through the effort of putting together a meeting then its serious work and needs to start on time
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QUOTES OF THE MONTH
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The S.E.C.R.E.T of Employee Engagement By Mark Wager
I was with a business organisation last week that had just received their employee engagement results. For those of you who haven’t been exposed to Employee Engagement surveys, it’s basically an indicator of how connected the employees are to their organisation. As the Managers went through the results there was a range of emotions ranging from pride to disappointment, even downright depression. The results were not what they had expected and as a result they buried their heads in the mountain of data that the survey produced in the hope that if they analysed each line they would find the answer as to how to motivate their employees. As I watched the flip charts and whiteboards fill up with ideas and suggestions I thought of my very first Manager of many years ago.
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When I was eighteen I had started working in retail, a shoe shop to be precise. I had aspirations to be a leader and I asked my Manager for some tips to which he replied "happy employees make good employees.” The Manager was basic in his approach. The motivation of people is a complex subject, more complex than I can place in an article but in essence he was correct. He knew something that is now confirmed by mountains of employee survey data that people don’t want to come to work to be miserable and very rarely do they come to work to do a bad job. People want to be happy and Managers seem to unwittingly find ways in order to prevent that happiness. Employee engagement surveys are a vital tool for any business but over-analysing each line of data can steer you away from the simplicity of employee engagement that is make your company a mechanism to help staff achieve their ambition to be happy rather than the barrier that prevents them from becoming happy.
In simple terms, if you want highly engaged employees you need to align their personal ambition to your organisations’ objectives. In order to do this you need to know something that I have developed and that is the secret of employee engagement and that secret is: Significance Empowerment Clarity Relationships Engagement Trust Now you know the S.E.C.R.E.T of employee engagement, let’s look at each one in particular along with some of the specific leadership actions that go along with them. Significance People need to feel valued and have a sense that there is a reason for their job existing and there's a reason why they are in that job rather than someone else. They are aware of what value they bring to the table and that value gives them a
positive image of themselves. Leadership actions: Praising staff, rewards, celebrating success, linking tasks to overall organisational objectives Empowerment People need the power and belief in themselves to be the makers of their own destiny. I've always believed a sign of a good leader is not only knowing when to stand up and lead but also when to sit down and get out of people's way. Leadership actions: Ensuring systems are working and manuals are up to date. Delegating responsibility rather than tasks, involving staff with decisions that impact on them.
"In simple terms if you want highly engaged employees you need to align their personal ambition to your organisations’ objectives."
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Clarity This could easily also be C for certainty. Fundamentally we haven't changed that much since we were babies. If we get a positive result for a specific behaviour then we repeat that behaviour yet if we get negative results then we change the behaviour. People need to be aware of what is expected from them and the consequences of their actions. People need clarity in order to make the correct decisions. Leadership actions: clear performance plans, job descriptions, consistent approach to managing performance. Relationships The most motivating factor for people in teams is their connection to their colleagues. Visions inspire us but it's our connection with people that turns that inspiration into constructive action. Leadership actions: regular team building, people are aware of each other's duties and their impact on everyone else. Engagement By engagement I mean people learning challenging new skills, variety in their workplace. People by their very nature seek out to grow and develop and when that need is not met, motivation diminishes. Employee engagement tends to be high when a person starts with a new employer and tends to fall with every proceeding year. An exception to this is with more mature staff typically aged 55+ Leadership actions: clear development plans for each staff member with their career path aligned to the organisations objectives. Trust This is the simplest and most obvious motivating factor but the most difficult to learn. You can teach people the theory of employee engagement and you can teach them the basics of psychological behaviours within teams but it's difficult to teach someone to be honest. The best you can do is to manage the consequences of their honest or dishonest behaviour. People want to believe and trust their leader, if that trust is lost then the leader is only a leader in name. Leadership actions: Regular meetings, Transparency of decision making, introduce "skip" meetings which are meeting between staff and their Manager's boss once in a while. This is not a comprehensive list but just an overview of the complexity of employee engagement and how some simple principles can motivate a team to reach a level that they never thought was possible. So remember whenever you are trying to solve the riddle of employee engagement just remember our little secret. Significance, empowerment, clarity, relationships, engagement, trust. ISSUE ONE | www.EliteLD.co.nz | Page 16
The Essential Leadership Values By Mark Wager
Leadership is the ability to instil power and belief into individuals and teams in order for them to reach levels they didn’t realise could be possible. Leaders create strong emotional connections which build loyalty, trust and engagement. These can only be created through honest open interactions through which the leader’s values are demonstrated. It is these very values that determine the effectiveness of a leader and I would like to take this opportunity to share my own personal leadership values which have been developed and refined over the course of my twenty five years as a leader. In my opinion these values are essential for any leader who truly wants to make a difference.
Honour. Always keep your word People need to have a level of trust and confidence in their leaders. If you say you are going to do something then do it. It doesn’t matter how small, such as saying you will email someone back by a certain time. If for some unforeseen reason you can’t, then let them know so that they don’t think they are forgotten. It may seem a small thing but for the person concerned it's not. If they can’t have faith that you will do the small things then how on earth can they have faith that you will do the things that really matter. ISSUE ONE | www.EliteLD.co.nz | Page 17
Integrity. Always do what’s right legally and morally People by their very nature, when faced with a decision will be drawn to the easiest option, the route of least discomfort. Leaders need to see the long term consequences and sometimes the route that seems easy today may contain some hidden long term pain. The temptation to always seek the easiest option is around us on a daily basis but leaders need to do what’s right both legally and morally because people need their leader to make the decisions that they can’t make.
compelling sometimes. It takes courage to follow someone and that courage will only exist if they see courage demonstrated by their leader. Take the chances necessary. Greatness is never achieved by playing it safe. At the heart of every failure rests the genesis of your greatest success. Honesty. Always tell the truth This should be a given but it’s amazing how many leaders I know who fall short of this value. Over the years I’ve learned that you can have any conversation with anyone if you have the right intent, humility and respect. So don’t shy away from telling people the truth. People will respect you for it because you are showing them the respect to handle the truth.
Courage. Don’t back down from a challenge There’s never been a person who has achieved greatness without having an inner fear whispering to them that they could have made a wrong decision. It takes courage to ignore that voice because let’s be honest that inner voice of caution can be incredibly
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Duty. Always do what’s expected from you The reason why people get paid a salary is that they get monetary compensation for certain duties. Unless you are incredibly lucky, you don’t get to pick and chose those duties based on what you prefer to do. Do your job and do it well. You don’t get the luxury of influencing people unless you get the basics right first. Chivalry.
as you experience more success. One of the most common failings among Leaders is their inability to effectively manage their ego which leads to them believing they are smarter, more important and occasionally funnier than they really are. Sacrifice. Prioritise the greater need ahead of personal glory
Humility.
If you need to sum up what leadership means in one word then that word would be “sacrifice.” Leadership is about power and power was never meant to be kept. It was always meant to be shared. A true test of a leader is the ability to make a decision, without a second thought, that would benefit the team and may sometimes be to the detriment of themselves personally. Obviously you want to avoid these situations but if the need arises then as a leader you need to be prepared for the unexpected and the best way to do that is to know yourself and remember what you stand for. Keep your leadership values in perspective and at the heart of everything you do.
Never forget that you still have much to learn
"When your values are clear to you, making decisions becomes easier."
Quality leaders never stop learning. Never forget who you are and where you come from. Humility keeps life in perspective which can be a challenge
Roy E. Disney
Treat everyone with polite respect An integral part of any successful team is the ability to treat colleagues with respect. Therefore, as a leader you need to demonstrate the behaviours that you want to see in others. Don’t hold grudges with people and yes I know it’s hard but remember that when you fall out with people it’s their behaviours that you have an issue with and not them as a person. Be the better person, be the leader that your team needs you to be and treat people with respect despite the provocation to do otherwise.
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Why Do We Avoid Conflict? By Mark Wager
The most common request I get for coaching is to assist people in dealing with conflict. People find conflict difficult and will sometimes go through great lengths in order to avoid it or they get themselves so worked up that by the time they deal with the conflict it’s escalated into something much bigger than it originally was. The end results are very rarely satisfactory. Why does this happen why do people tend to avoid conflict? The answer is: We avoid conflict because we misinterpret messages that our mind sends to us. As human beings we have instincts that are wired in such a way that have enabled the human race to survive over 200,000 years. Two of those such instincts, while they help us survive, also send us false messages to avoid conflict. It’s our ability to feel pain and our imagination that is at the root of the problem.
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We feel pain in order for us to know what to avoid, so we instinctively do what we can to avoid pain. Our imagination enables us to predict what will happen in a situation without necessarily experiencing that situation. I have never ever placed my hand in an open fire and I never will because I can imagine what will happen even though I have never been burned before. These instincts assist us every day but when it comes to conflict they commonly fail us. When faced with conflict whether it’s in the workplace or in our private life we imagine the consequences of dealing with that conflict and it’s rare that in our imagination the resolution goes well. In fact it tends to go very badly when arguments start, voices are raised and relationships and even careers are damaged forever. So with this mindset it’s no wonder that we anticipate pain so we do what we can to avoid conflict.
The scenario we imagine is wrong and with the right techniques conflict can be easily managed and we soon learn that conflict is not something that needs to be avoided in fact it’s something that needs to be sought out. The conventional thinking is that relationships both personally and professionally are most successful when people compromise a lot and have a high threshold before they raise issues but there have been many studies to illustrate that the opposite is true. The secret to a strong relationship is to be able to raise issues as they occur and before they escalate. This is called “A low negativity threshold”
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"We avoid conflict
because
we misinterpret messages that our mind sends to us."
I know from my experience of developing teams and individuals over the past twenty five years across a range of industries, nationalities and cultures that avoiding conflict does not avoid pain it just delays the pain and when the pain surfaces its far greater than it was originally. My biggest mistakes as a leader were as a result of not having enough conflict in my team rather than having too much. I never created the environment that empowered people to raise suggestions and ideas and to talk to me about issues,no matter how small, that they were unhappy about. Ignore your inner thoughts when they tell you not to raise issues and learn the techniques that conflict resolution requires and before you know it your life will be changed for the better.
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