WHATIF?

ith so much going on in the world of late, do you find yourself asking what if? I do. Often. It’s a strange question for me to ponder because I am naturally a relatively positive person, and more often than not, I see life’s beauty and possibilities - people included. So Happy-go-lucky was I, never met a stranger, and I always managed to find the rainbow. It’s a pot of gold... well, that’s another story.

Not sure when I became less enamored by the everyday. So many blame the pandemic. I don’t. It’s not the first, and certainly won’t be the last. It definitely scared me a bit, but the fear didn’t cripple me. I did what came naturally. I protected my home, family, and close friends. I kept informed, created a safe space, trusted science and its’ scientists, prayed, meditated, and watched and learned from nature as it began to protect and heal itself from the mess we make of this planet. Let’s not forget the earth doesn’t need us. We need it. It has managed to sort out all its woes for billions of years. What’s our excuse?

I remember so vividly the first two weeks of lockdown. I’d sit on my deck every day. Not a sound from traffic or voices. No movement. Just the sound of still. What a lovely sound, still. A slight rustle of leaves on the trees and a gentle whisper of wind. Birds were singing all day long. It was amazing. My deck became my connection to the world and what it was to become. What if? I thought.

WHas the beauty we’ve lost found her way home? Or is this the end? Are the skies about to open and drop all the answers to our questions and fears onto our laps, along with penance to absolve our sins? Or a strike of lightning to wipe us all out, leaving us to perish without a clue of who, what, when, or why? Either way, it is a time to reflect. Whatever good is meant to be from this has to come from us. And it is not going to be easy. Lessons seldom are. But how we learn from them and teach others helps to ensure our blessings. It’s a kind of order. Do right. In spite. A ritual perhaps better served. And, for so many impossible to ingest. What if it wasn’t? What if the sky had opened up and dropped all the answers on us? Listening and living among the chaos and madness of these past few years, I wonder, WHAT IF we listened? What if we cared? What if we believed? What if we loved? What if we remembered what this amazing, beautiful gift of life is meant for? Think about it. Just, what if?

I’ve seen much ugly lately and heard even uglier. I witnessed behavior and idiocies in people I hoped were bigger and better. I shake my head in amazement. I am amazed not by what they lack but by what they don’t see. A sky so blue, a tree so green, an ocean so full - a face so beautiful. Nature is calling. Wake up. Appreciate what’s left. Rethink and rebuild what’s lost. Have a good look inside of yourself, then look outward. The view becomes so much clearer, brighter, and eternal. What if we see hope?

From Hollywood Podcast on iHeart Radio. A Columnist for The Eden Magazine since 2016.

Joey was raised in NYC, Malibu, and West Hollywood. He is the son of Film & Television Actor Joe Santos, and his Grandfather is World-Renowned Latin Singer Daniel Santos. To follow Joey on IG: @jojoboy13

To contact Joey; whynotjoe@gmail.com

By Susie Schroadter

Life moves fast. Most of the time, we are white-knuckling through our days, allowing the simple moments of beauty to pass unnoticed. Yet, what I have learned, and must remind myself, is that not only is it acceptable to slow down, it is absolutely necessary.

We must take the time to ease our souls back into alignment with our light. It is only then that we may shine as brightly as we once did before the external world took precedence over our internal peace. The question becomes, how do we do this? How do we protect our Peace and walk our way home to our hearts? My answer is to remember to breathe, pray, set boundaries, practice gratitude, and intentionally choose peace and love.

Below are some exercises I use with myself and my clients to create a sense of grounding and ease when it’s time to slow down.

Breathe

“Smile, breathe, and go slowly.”

~Nhat

Hanh

We all have tasks to complete. We race around trying to get everything done, to check items off of our lists. Yet, as we do this, we take ourselves out of the present moment and activate our sympathetic nervous system, causing our muscles to tense, our heart to beat faster, our breathing to be more shallow, and our body to tighten.

When you feel this anxiety or stress, I invite you to take 5 minutes to sit. Circle out your jaw. Lick and part your lips. Roll your shoulders up to your ears and then wrap them down your back to lift your heart. Gently tuck your chin, so there is a long line of energy up your spine, allowing the breath to cycle without obstacle, allowing it to flow smoothly. Take a moment and scan your body. Become the observer. What happens when you become aware of a point of stress? Does it lessen? Close your eyes. Take three deep breaths in through the nose and sigh them out through your mouth. Start to inhale through your nose for a count of four and exhale gently through your mouth as if blowing a kiss or a candle. Allow your sitz bones to go heavy. Know you are supported by the chair upon which you sit. You are safe. Continue to breathe in through the nose and out through the mouth. Settle a little more with each exhale. Releasing all that no longer serves you, allowing yourself to create space for the peace and love that will meet you throughout your day.

Prayer

“Loving Kindness is a profound recognition that our lives have something to do with one another, that everyone counts, and everyone matters.

~ Sharon Salzberg

Prayer is a way to speak to the Divine in a sacred manner. One way to open our hearts and expand our compassion for ourselves and others is through Loving-Kindness Meditation and Prayer. There are four lines that we repeat silently to ourselves. They can then be repeated in honor of someone we love and for all Beings Everywhere. This will calm the heart and invite peace into the day. The prayer is as follows:

May I be filled with Loving-Kindness

May I be Healthy in Mind and Body

May I Be Safe

May I Be at Peace

Boundaries

“Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others.”

~ Brene Brown

As we journey on the path of awakening, we begin to understand the way others trust us is not a reflection of our own worth but rather of their pain. However, there comes the point when excusing their actions because of their wounds and trauma actually creates new wounds and trauma within ourselves. We must learn to find a balance where we can show another love and compassion and yet show ourselves the very same love and compassion.

To do so, we release the other and send them love, yet simultaneously create a boundary for ourselves where we will not accept nor excuse their behavior. Simply because one is in pain does not mean they can treat you poorly.

We all have a past and a story, but this does not give us a pass to hurt others. In excusing their behavior, we actually enable them to continue with it instead of loving them enough to let them heal and grow.

Remember the light that is within you and let it shine.

For today, ask yourself in each moment whether or not the conversation you are having feels good. If it does, continue it; if it does not, step away. Begin to say no when you are not feeling supported. Set a boundary in your life and see what happens next.

Gratitude

“Take a deep breath and think of the three things you are grateful for right in this moment.”

~M.J. Ryan

The practice of gratitude is not simply an abstract “good for you” fad; there is scientific proof of the benefits to our physical and emotional systems when we live in a more thankful state.

By constantly thinking in a negative manner, our neural pathways associated with the emotion become reinforced, and eventually, the thinking becomes an automatic reaction. By leaning into gratitude, science has proven that we are able to rewire our brain away from negative emotions to a more automatic response of love and appreciation.

Today and every day, write down three things that you are grateful for each morning and night and feel how your life begins to change.

Choose Peace. Choose Love. “Inner peace begins the moment you choose not to allow another person or event to control your emotions.”

~Buddha

Every moment we have a choice. We can choose love or fear, abundance or scarcity, hope or despair. The circumstances of our individual lives may not always be ideal, but how we react to them is within our control. We can see the lesson through the tears of heartache. We can grow even as our hearts break, and we can find companionship even in our isolation.

As we continue to breathe into the next moment, we find peace through the cracks that allow the light in, the love to heal, and our trust to grow. Trust that there is more than what our eyes see. Trust that there is beauty even in sorrow. Trust that we will find our peace.

So for today, I invite you to choose love. Choose love in the hard moments and the easy ones. Choose love in the moments you want to cry and the ones you want to smile. Make the conscious choice to choose love.

With the use of these different tools or ones you create for yourself, my wish for you is to surrender your past, release your expectations, and greet the world with an open heart as you embark on a journey to the unknown.

Susie Schroadter, once a practicing attorney and mediator, has has turned her focus to creating Sage, a safe sanctuary to allow others to heal. She offers consulting and strategy for those going into mediation or dealing with life altering events so that they may be empowered and advocate for themselves. Once those events have occurred, she also offers different modalities for healing such as life and spiritual guidance and energy work.

www.sanctuaryforpeace.co