14.32 Mind Body Spirit 2011, January 27, 2011, Volume 14, Issue 32, MauiTime

JANUARY A 27, 2011

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VOLUME 14

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ISSUE 32

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MIND BODY SPIRIT our annual g guide to

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Contents VOLUME 14

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THIS WEEK’S QUESTION: What’s in the worst shape: your mind, body or spirit?

Editor: Jacob Shafer (808) 283-1308 / jacob@mauitime.com @jacobshafer on Twitter Mind Associate Editor: Anu Yagi (808) 264-8039 / calendar@mauitime.com @anuheayagi on Twitter All of the above Proofreader: Dina Wilson Contributors: Caeriel Crestin, Jory John, Avery Monsen, Ron Pitts, Chuck Shepherd, Sara Tekula, Ynez Tongson, Barry Wurst II Photographer: Sean Michael Hower mauiweddingmedias.com / howerphotography.com All of the above Art Director: Chris Skiles chris@mauitime.com / lucky11studios.com Mind Graphic Designers: Shane Fontanilla, Naomi D. Sheikin, Christina Tarleton Advertising Executive: Brad Chambers (808) 283-3260 / brad@mauitime.com Mind General Manager: Jennifer Russo (808) 280-3286 / jen@mauitime.com @jenrusso on Twitter Spirit Administrative Executive: Judy Toba (808) 244-0777 / judy@mauitime.com Booty Administrative Assistant: Jennifer Brown Mind Web Design: Linear Publishing Publisher: Tommy Russo (808) 283-0512 / tommy@mauitime.com @tommyrusso on Twitter All of the above

ISSUE 32

5 NEWS & VIEWS Coconut Wireless finds out why Gov. Abercrombie has the Tourism Authority on notice. Hawaii patents rise and a Maui spy gets sentenced in By the Numbers.

Councilmember Mike White has divided loyalties in Spin Cycle. Open Letters is blue over red lights. Quizunderstood asks about ballsy Jaws surfers and sand. Neo-Nazi tats mark up News of the Weird. Eh Brah! throws stones at old rockers.

10 FEATURE STORY From hot yoga to personalized perfumes to fake cigarettes to extreme diets, we look at ways to improve yourself inside and out. It’s the Mind, Body, Spirit issue.

26 FILM CRITIQUE Barry Wurst II says The Way Back is really raw, even if it’s not really real.

27 Film Capsules/Listings

28 THIS WEEK’S PICKS A weekend of Get A Job screenings at the Iao, a swanky spa soiree and a Battle of the Bands (with a big prize) at the Hard Rock.

30 Da Kine Calendar 31 Grid

36 BACK PAGES Kula Kid Tarots caution to the wind. Sign Language tells Aries to look a gift horse in the mouth.

38 Classified 39 Mind, Body & Spirit MauiTime is published every Thursday by MauiTime Productions, Inc. Its contents are Copyright © 2010 by MauiTime Productions, Inc. All rights reserved.

Subscriptions are available at $70 per year. Reproduction or use without permission is strictly prohibited. MauiTime may be distributed only by MauiTime’s authorized independent contractor. MauiTime is valued at $.50 per copy and permits one complimentary copy per person. No person may, without written permission of MauiTime, take more than one copy of each weekly issue. All opinions expressed throughout MauiTime are those of the authors and not necessarily the same opinions as MauiTime Productions, Inc. and MauiTime.

MauiTime 33 N. Market St., Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793 office (808) 244-0777 • fax (808) 244-0446 www.mauitime.com @mauitime on Twitter Deadlines: Display Advertising: Friday Noon Classified: Monday 4pm Calendar: Monday Noon Circulation: 18,000 copies of the MauiTime

H A W A I I ’ S

- Early Valentine’s Day Sale Saturday January 29, 2011 Save 25% on our entire Lavender Organic Product line.

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- Ladies Day Out (Men Welcome too!) Sunday, January 30, 2011 Lavender tea & scone at leisure, walking tour, plus 10% off all Bath & Body purchases. $10 p/p ($30 value).

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BY JACOB SHAFER

NEWS&VIEWS

jacob@mauitime.com + @jacobshafer on Twitter

Coconut Wireless Questioning Their Authority For all the battles she fought—with the legislature, with the teachers union, with the media—Gov. Lingle maintained a consistently cozy relationship with the Hawaii Tourism Authority (HTA).

In fact, she spent what seemed like the majority of her final year in office jetting off to China on HTA’s behalf.

Add that to the long list of reasons why Gov. Abercrombie isn’t Lingle.

In his first State of the State address this week, Abercrombie put HTA on notice. “The amount we are spending in the name of marketing Hawaii has grown disproportionate to the amount we need to spend on Hawaii’s own infrastructure,” he said. Currently, HTA gets more than $70 million annually; Abercrombie wants to “reallocate” some of that money to fund “environmental protection, improvements to public facilities and advancing culture and the arts.”

(This is nothing new. In a MauiTime interview last June, then-candidate Abercrombie criticized Lingle for allowing HTA to spend hotel tax money without oversight in the name of protecting “marketing secrets.” “Excuse me?”

Abercrombie scoffed at the time. “What marketing secrets are known among the Hawaii Tourism Authority that are unknown to the rest of the world?”)

Predictably, tourism officials greeted Abercrombie’s words with hand-wringing and dire warnings. “We could see lost jobs, reduced hours, less private infrastructure reinvestment and ultimately fewer collected taxes to fill state coffers,” Keith Vieira, a marketing rep for Starwood Hotels, told the Honolulu Star-Advertiser.

Mufi Hannemann—Abercrombie’s former opponent and currently the head of the Hawaii Hotel & Lodging

Association—was more measured in his remarks: “It’s early,” he said. “No one is hitting the panic button.” Perhaps, but at the very least there are some itchy fingers.

Justice Delayed—Or Justice Denied?

“It’s a steep climb anywhere in the country, but in Hawaii it’s particularly steep.” That’s attorney Brook Hart of the Hawaii Innocence Project (HIP), discussing the plight of Alvin Jardine, a Maui resident who spent 20 years

NEWS BRIEFS

years of searching HIP was able to locate a tablecloth that contained samples of “male secretions”—none of which matched Jardine. Based on that finding, 2nd District Judge Joel August vacated Jardine’s conviction. Now the state must decide whether to proceed with yet another trial.

Meanwhile, the 41-year-old Jardine—who was flown to Maui from a private prison in Arizona partly on HIP’s dime—is free on bail. UH professor and HIP director Virginia Hench says Jardine is spending time with his family, “relieved but a little overwhelmed

Hawaii is one of the few states that doesn’t guarantee reparations for the wrongly convicted. In fact, prisoners who are freed after being found innocent are in some respects worse off than those freed on parole. behind bars for a crime he says he didn’t commit—and who last week was granted a new trial based on DNA evidence.

In 1992, after two deadlocked juries, Jardine was convicted of rape, assault, kidnapping and burglary. DNA testing was much cruder at the time, and Hart says the prosecution relied mostly on “faulty identification procedures.” Jardine maintained his innocence throughout, even refusing offers to shorten his sentence if he admitted guilt and entered a sex-offender treatment program.

In 2005, the newly formed Innocence Project took on the case. By then most of the evidence had been destroyed, but after

The Blog Roll

and not ready to be a public figure.”

Jardine is the first person whose conviction HIP has helped overturn; both Hart and Hench credit the efforts of attorney Bill Harrison and a “team of dedicated students.” But Jardine’s story isn’t over. Even if the state drops the charges or he wins acquittal, there’s still the question of those 20 lost years.

Hench says Hawaii is one of the few states that doesn’t guarantee reparations for the wrongly convicted. In fact, she adds, prisoners who are freed after being found innocent are in some respects worse off than those freed on parole—at least parolees have access to public assistance.

Jardine can sue, but that means even more legal wrangling and quite possibly stepping into a courtroom. Considering what he’s been through, that’s probably the second-to-last place he wants to be. ■ To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1432c

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NEWS&VIEWS

By the NUMBERS

6 27 119 115,866 32 years

Consecutive months that Hawaii’s unemployment rate has remained at 6.4 percent

Months since the national unemployment rate was as low as 6.4 percent

Number of patents issued to Hawaii residents in 2010, a 26 percent increase compared to 2009

Number of patents issued to U.S. residents in 2010, a 23 percent increase compared to 2009 Prison sentence given this week to former Defense Department engineer and Haiku resident Noshir Gowadia, for selling military secrets to China

Sources: Hawaii Department of Labor and Industrial Relations, U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, U.S. Patent and Trademark Office, Hawaii News Now

SPINcycle

QUIZunderstood 1. Clint Eastwood brought one to Maui last year, and on January 23 the makers of Hawaii Five-O threatened to bring one to Oahu. What is it?

2. Australian big-wave surfer Mark Visser

Who Got Served?

recently attacked the swells at Jaws with what added twist (something that’s supposedly never been done before)?

During the campaign, Mike White made no secret of his deep ties to the tourism sector. How could he? He manages the Kaanapali Beach Hotel and has served on the board of directors of the Maui Visitors Bureau (MVB). But he also said—repeatedly, in the face of questioning by us, his opponent Kai Nishiki and others—that he’d represent the people of Maui and the MakawaoHaiku-Paia district first and foremost.

3. According to most geologists, at what diameter does sand become gravel?

BONUS: At what diameter does silt become sand?

See answers, page 37

It’s still early, of course, but White raised some eyebrows at the January 21 Council meeting when, in one of his first acts as a Councilmember, he asked the Mayor to amend the budget and allocate more money for MVB.

That may be true, but by choosing to immediately and forcefully go to bat for MVB, White did nothing to diminish the perception that he's less a public servant and more a visitor industry shill. - JS

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Reached for comment, White said he did it to make up for funds MVB lost in previous rounds of cuts, and to give a vital part of the island’s economy a shot in the arm. As for how it serves the people of his district, he said he spoke with business owners in Makawao and Paia who confirmed that more than half their revenue comes from tourists. White added that “there is no conflict of interest” since he doesn't stand to enjoy any “specific financial benefit.“

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EH BRAH!

NEWS OF THE WEIRD

Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations, 200 words or less (which we reserve the right to edit), changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent, to “Eh Brah!” c/o MauiTime, 33 N. Market St, Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793 or send an e-mail to

MEDICARELESS (1) The federal agency that administers Medicare acknowledged to the South Florida Sun-Sentinel in November that the government often overpays for patient wheelchairs due to a quirk in its rules.

Ordinary wheelchairs sell for $100 to $350, but Medicare cannot reimburse patients who buy the chairs; it can only pay for rentals (for up to 13 months), for $40 to $135 a month.

(A 2009 audit found that Medicare allowed up to $7,215 for oxygen dispensers that were available for sale for $587 and $4,018 for a power wheelchair that cost suppliers $1,048.) (2) A December Wall Street Journal investigation turned up instances of physical-therapy doctors earning millions of dollars a year in Medicare payments by “treating” nonexistent patients, overtreating real patients and providing controversial “treatments” that other therapists say are useless. Describing the work of hardpartying, spike-haired Miami Beach doctor Christopher Wayne, one former physicaltherapy association official likened Wayne’s expensive “treatment” to “back rubs.”

(Medicare law requires prompt payment to doctors but prevents the public release of doctors’ billing records—even if all patient identification is hidden—thus ensuring that any Medicare abuses can only be uncovered by a small team of federal investigators and not by the press unless, as the Journal did, they investigate patient by patient.)

HOPE THE AIR USED PROTECTION In October, borrowing from the U.S. Air Guitar Championship (which honors selfmade guitar “heroes” playing wild rock ‘n roll as if they were holding real guitars), the second annual Air Sex Championship was held in the Music Hall in Brooklyn, New York, and eventually won by Lady C. (whose performance could not easily be described). Each contestant (solo only) had two minutes to cover “all the bases”: “meeting, seduction, foreplay, intercourse, and, if successful, afterglow.” Exposing body parts was not allowed.

GOVERNMENT INACTION The New Jersey Government Record

Council ruled in December that the town of Somerset had overcharged Tom Coulter in 2008 by $4.04 on the $5 it collected for a compact disc of a council meeting and must issue a refund. The town estimates that it spent about $17,000 fighting Coulter’s appeals and paying his attorney’s fees.

PROPHET MOTIVES Police in Hyderabad, Pakistan, recently arrested a doctor for the increasingly suspect crime of insulting Islam—after he merely tossed away the business card of a man who happened to have the last name “Muhammad.” According to a December Associated Press dispatch, “dozens” of Pakistanis are sentenced to death each year for such tangential references to the holy name of Muhammad, but the government fears that trying to repeal the law might incite Muslim extremism.

ehbrah@mauitime.com Please, get some new material for your hippie paintedguitar act. You may think everyone loves a middle aged chick dancing on the bar—but sister and brother “rockers,” that’s where we eat. Seems like wherever we go these days, it’s the same old “Layla” and “Freebird” flowing out of the local bars and restaurants from the same old musicians. Time to move over and let the new kids have a chance at the mic.

Onward and upward or outta here—my ears are bleeding. ■ To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1432e

MOTHER OF THE YEAR Katrina Camp, 30, was picked up by deputies in September on a Forest Service road near Nederland, Colorado, having earlier walked away from her unclothed 2-year-old daughter, whom she had left to fend for herself in a pickup truck. Camp, however, was candid about the problem: “You’re a parent,” she told a deputy. “You know how it is. Sometimes you just need a break.”

TAT’S ALL By his own testimony, John Ditullio is a hateful neo-Nazi who despised his nextdoor neighbors in New Port Richey, Florida (a white woman with an African-American friend and a son who was openly gay), but when the son was murdered and the mother attacked in 2006, Ditullio denied involvement. He earned a hung jury in his first trial, and his retrial was scheduled for November 2010. For each day of the trial, a makeup artist was hired (paid for by the government at $135 a day) to cover up Ditullio’s swastika neck tattoo and crude-phrase cheek tattoo so as to keep jurors from being unfairly prejudiced.

Nonetheless, Ditullio was convicted in December and sentenced to death. ■ To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1432n

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MIND BODY SPIRIT our annual guide g to

health & wellness Photos by Sean Michael Hower

aking things for granted is what humans do best.

Our modern lives are laden with conveniences and technological marvels that we tend to regard mostly with a big, fat “meh.” But there’s nothing we take for granted more than our own bodies. Each of us is an incredible feat of biological engineering, a series of mind-bogglingly complex systems working in perfect harmony, all without us having to lift a finger (and, yes, even the process by which we lift our fingers is pretty damn amazing). And yet for the most part we stumble along oblivious, regarding our physical, spiritual and mental well-being as a tiresome chore that must occasionally be tended to so we can get back to the Spam musubi and home-decorating shows.

But we aren’t here to lecture—honestly. We’re here to offer guidance, inspiration and support, a roadmap to better health that will make the journey, along with the destination, enjoyable. Not every method or idea outlined in the following pages will work for everyone, but we hope you can find a bit of inspiration, a seed that may grow into increased awareness of and appreciation for, well, you.

Taking things for granted is what we do best—but striving to do better is a close second.

10 JANUARY 27, 2011

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MIND BODY SPIRIT

Words by Anu Yagi / Photos by Sean Michael Hower / Modeled by Nadia Toraman

Bent Out of Shape

c

Yoga—especially hot yoga—isn’t for the faint of heart. But it’ll make your heart, and you, a lot healthier Curl your index finger lightly and let its tip caress the top of your thumb, leaving your middle, ring and pinky fingers loosely outstretched. Congratulations, you’ve just assumed one of the most commonly recognized yogic mudras—the fundamental hand positions said to incite the flow of prana throughout your being (though the action is not always limited

retreats. And yoga is, like, old and has had a lot of time to become a lot of different things. Archaeologists have unearthed symbols in the Indus Valley that date early yogic practices c. 3300 BCE. There are eight major forms of yoga—Bhakti, Hatha, Jnana, Karma, Laya, Mantra, Raja and Vedanta—and from those stem dozens of styles (plus a bevy of contemporary

There are eight major forms of yoga and from those stem dozens of styles, plus a bevy of contemporary hybridized interpretations and samplings.

to the hands, and the practice not limited to yoga). Called a chin or vitarka or gyan mudr —among other names, depending on myriad finer details—this A-OK shape is believed to stimulate the diaphragm.

Not to brag, but I long-ago mastered this mudra and practice it daily with the deep breathing exercise of chain smoking.

As for my yoga experience, the last time I engaged in any semblance of exercise was in October 2009 (seriously), in a coed, all-ages game of Ultimate Frisbee.

These two truisms mean I am the bestsuited journalist on the MauiTime team to explore the ancient art of yoga. Not only do I have an obvious objective lens, but I’m pretty sure my editor gave me the assignment in hopes it might stave off my death-by-neglect long enough for me to make it through just one more issue.

As a bonus, dear readers, it turns out I have the flexibility of a Festivus pole (on the plus-side, “very high strengthto-weight ratio”), which if nothing else proved to be comical. In this case, a picture would have been worth a thousand words—but frankly, cameras are expensive and breaking one is just not in the budget. Though, seeing as it’s been awhile, I did have to drop some dough on yoga duds—i.e. wide-leg drawstring pants, a sports bra and an unfortunately Pepto-pink mat.

So I was all dressed up, but now where to go? On Maui, you can do everything from free yoga on the beach to costly

12 JANUARY 27, 2011

hybridized interpretations and samplings).

Being utterly confused by so many choices, I decided to reintroduce my muscles to movement with a form of Hatha yoga called Bikram (you know, the kind of yoga done in rooms heated to 100105 degrees). I know, start small, right?

Honestly, the intensity was what attracted me to Bikram in the first place.

I love things that come with warning labels, and Bikram Yoga Maui (871-2402) sent me a letter saying, “WARNING: This yoga will change your life. It might even save it. [It] will whip your body, mind and spirit into shape. There’s no sugar coating, no lying to yourself and others to make you feel better. Happiness loves truth.” I ended up trying a few different styles, from the popular flowing Ashtanga that begins with saluting the sun and jumping into downward dog, to a beginner’s class that even I found pretty easy. But of all the tastes in my yoga sampler, Bikram was the one that made me want to come back for seconds.

They promise healthy transformation after just one class, and—though all their classes are geared for beginners—lovingly refer to their sessions as “90 minutes

in the torture chamber.” I discovered their masochism is no exaggeration, but managed to survive and sure did feel altered in the best of ways.

U

pon arrival, Bikram Yoga Maui owners Tony Oliveira and Gina Marinoni gave me a tour of their pristine, spa-like facilities. From floor to ceiling there’s a fresh, self-evident air of cleanliness. “Bikram is about cleaning your body from the inside out— on a cellular level,” Oliveira explaiend. “So it’s important that our place reflect the same cleanliness.”

That’s a great thing, considering my biggest fear (other than a heat stroke) was what all the inevitable sweat might smell like. Oliveira showed me the innovative solution they use called P.E.M., a poly-extruded matting (that looks a little like angel hair pasta) originally designed for boats that lays atop a linoleum floor—both of which are regularly and vigorously cleaned.

But why intentionally induce extra sweat in the first place? Oliveira explained that heat is what makes Bikram unique, one benefit » continued on pg.22

(Not pictured) Anu sweating like an atheist in church.

Dr.

JANUARY 27, 2011 13

MIND BODY SPIRIT

Words by Ynez Tongson

Scent From Above Think perfume is just for disguising BO? Think—or rather, smell—again Most days, I’m one deep breath away from a panic attack. One recent evening was especially bad—my nerves were held together by spit and coffee; a sneeze would have painted me across Paia Corner. Stepping into Agua de Flora (aguadeflora.com) changed all that.

The interior is somewhere between a mad scientist’s lab and a Victorian-style boudoir. The tables are covered with intricate glasswork, the kind artisans sell their souls to some shadowy god to make.

Stored within the glass are amber gold liquids peeking through antique-looking labels. But before I get ahead of myself with, ahem, flowery imagery, let me explain a little about Agua de Flora and what a “scent portrait” is.

Usually, I go to department stores vainly trying to identify the notes within the complicated packaging. Is that ode to alcohol? Maybe sassy synthetic? I can’t even make it through a perfume department without my brain pounding against my skull, in protest against olfactory overload. At Agua de Flora, each scent was clear and distinct. To smell a vial of cinnamon was to have its sharp bite on my tongue. If you get the slightest bit dizzy, it’s with excitement.

Agua de Flora uses hydro-distillations and hydrosols to create their one-of-akind perfume, incorporating fair trade and organic agriculture. Their specific

behind much of Agua de Flora’s perfumes.

Morrow’s education in scent is far from over—she says she continues to learn something new every day. She also works with Ryan Hornbeck, a devoted bodyworker, who uses distillations and oils in his healing sessions.

Perfumery, as described by Morrow, is a combination of alchemy, music, cooking and unadulterated joy. Each component is considered on its own, but also in conjunction with others. A single note is just one part of a labyrinthine whole and with expertise and perhaps a little luck, they work together to create a complex harmony.

With Ella Fitzgerald crooning in the background, and the drone of Paia traffic outside, I tentatively began my scent exploration. Prior to the session, Morrow asked about smells I prefer, my background and even my diet. This narrowed down the selections, as well as tailored the scent. On a wooden table, Morrow laid out 30 or so glass vials, with their labels facing away from me so I wouldn’t have any pre-conceived notions about a scent before I experienced it. This was especially the case when I smelled a rich, almost musky and definitely spicy aroma—which turned out to be vintage patchouli. “Patchouli is misunderstood,” Morrow explained.

She spoke of each scent like a good

I left Agua de Flora smiling, almost giggling, and erratically smelling myself. distillation process—created by the worldrenowned Jack Chaitman—uses pure silica glass stills and water as the only solvent. By using hydrosols, the materials more readily retain their individual scents and healing properties. All products sold at Agua de Flora use hydrosols and shun synthetic fillers for natural ingredients such as beeswax and jojoba oil. The result is scent portraits, or customized perfume, that cater to your preferences. The evening I visited, co-owner Ashana Sophia Morrow helped create my soon-to-be signature scent.

Morrow has smell down to a science, but expresses it like an artist. Growing up on an organic farm in Massachusetts, her love affair with fragrance blossomed as she travelled the world and was mentored

by Christa Obuchowski, the mastermind

14 JANUARY 27, 2011

friend, explaining history and medicinal purposes, reading brief excerpts, saying which scents would complement or overpower one another and helping me identify subtle differences. An orange is just an orange, right? With gentle encouragement, I was able to appreciate the surprising sweetness of bitter green orange, the richness of blood orange and the acridity of sweet orange.

Smell plays a huge role in our lives.

Olfaction and emotion are both regulated by the limbic system, meaning smell can immediately induce memory or emotion recall. For example, the aroma of cloves, with its cloying sweetness, will forever remind me of pretentious hipsters. In contrast, when I sniffed a vial of vanilla, I nearly cried; to behold such a beautiful

concentration was the closest I’ll be to heaven. I remembered the feeling of falling in love and old adventures. A deluge of memories came to me as I sniffed my way through the session, all the while whispering the promises of new ones.

It’s important to recognize that a scent will smell different in the bottle than it does on your skin; perfumes react to temperature and body chemistry. And over time, a scent blooms and matures.

My own portrait (which I am tentatively calling Eau de Awesome), smells of cinnamon in the bottle. When applied to the skin, notes of sandalwood join the

chorus. Given time, the woodwinds of citrus appear with the steady percussion of vanilla. Faintly, you can catch touches of vetiver and magnolia.

By the time I finished my 90-minute session, my whole mood had changed.

I felt new, uplifted and ready to face the world. I left Agua de Flora smiling, almost giggling, and erratically smelling myself.

Being Paia, it meant I blended seamlessly with the regular crowd. Except, of course, I smelled amazing. ■ To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1432m2

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MIND BODY SPIRIT

Words by Jen Russo / Photos by Paul Herchig

Riding The Macro Wave Eating pure, organic, local food—it’s not just a diet, it’s a way of life

i

I like to think of macrobiotic cuisine in radical terms—as a way to shrug off the pressure of the corporate food structure.

So much of what we eat is controlled: by the government, by convenience, by mass production. Really, macrobiotics is more of a philosophy than a diet, but the idea— basically vegetarianism with a twist—is said to deliver serious health benefits.

Strolling through a modern supermarket, it quickly becomes apparent that Americans prefer scientists to chefs and cooks. Pre-packaged, artificial food is everywhere, drowning out simple ingredients like beans, whole grains and fresh vegetables. It boiled down to a simple question: do you want to eat something created in a lab, or grown and prepared by human hands? Given how many people answer the former, it’s no

thought of as practitioners, almost like a religion, more than just a group of people with similar eating habits.

Though it was refined by the Japanese, the ancient Greek physician Hippocrates is credited as the first to use the word “macrobiotics,” stemming from makro meaning large, great or long, and bios meaning life. And the diet centers on one of his more famous quotes: “Let food be thy medicine and medicine thy food.”

The basic rules of thumb are to eat locally, seasonally and organically and to include fermented foods. Michael Pollan, author of many books on eating, adds a wrinkle in his Six Rules for Eating Wisely: “Don’t eat anything your great great great great grandmother wouldn’t recognize as food.” Pollan also advocates shopping at farmers markets.

Strolling through a modern supermarket, it quickly becomes apparent that Americans prefer scientists to chefs and cooks. wonder we struggle with health issues like diabetes, heart disease and cancer.

It all makes sense—but can I get off the white bread? Has my palate been permanently damaged by hot dogs and canned green beans? To get an answer, I delved deeper into the idea of macrobiotics and consuming what farmers grow locally, exchanging bad eating habits for good ones.

C

hef Leslie Ashburn, a macrobiotic chef and educator on Oahu, calls it, simply, “a wholefoods, plant-based diet” that “will help support local farmers, build the economy and protect the environment.” And, Ashburn adds, it can save you money, too—even if the food is a tad more expensive. “Our financial resources are often diverted to purchasing stimulants, depressants, sleeping pills, pain killers and medications to alleviate the symptoms from an unhealthy diet,” she says.

I first heard of macrobiotics when a family member came down with cancer and it was suggested as part of the treatment. Macrobiotic followers are

16 JANUARY 27, 2011

Eating seasonally means knowing what fruits and vegetables are in season where you live, an art long forgotten in this age of refrigerated shipping containers. According to the Hawaii Seasonality Chart, right now we have avocado, citrus, rambutan and strawberries as well as cabbage, corn, sweet potato, sprouts and mushrooms. Seems like plenty to work with.

It can also mean eating with the seasons.

In the winter, soups, stews and warm dishes are what the body needs, even here in Hawaii where the weather changes subtly. In the spring and summer lighter, cooler and raw foods are recommended.

“The key to eating well is taking what you like and making it into a healthier version,” says Chef Ashburn.

“There are no rules for what you can and can’t eat.” She says eating meat—or not—is a personal decision, but “there are recommendations based on current research related to how animal food is more frequently linked with illness.”

B

aby steps: I wanted to try just one day of purely macrobiotic eating.

Ashburn » continued on pg.24

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JANUARY 27, 2011 17

MIND BODY SPIRIT

Words by Dali Singh

Cig Idea

w

Electronic cigarettes are touted as a safer, cleaner alternative—but are they actually like the real thing?

When it comes to getting healthy, there’s few steps you can take that are as effective and immediate as tossing your cigarettes in the trash. But don’t fret, this won’t be a finger-pointing, holier-than-thou lecture about the harmful effects of smoking— you’re already well aware of those.

And, if you’ve ever tried to quit, you’re probably also aware of the fact that none of the so-called “substitutes” are anything close to the real deal. Enter the electronic cigarette, a battery-operated device filled with liquid nicotine that mimics the physical and tactile sensations of smoking, without the tar or carbon monoxide. The buzz on e-cigs is spreading rapidly across the globe, and for good reason. Many people who try the device say it’s an effective quitting tool—and actually manages to replicate the pleasure of taking a smoke break.

Makers of the products claim that there are no carcinogens in the e-cig, compared to the traditional cigarette, which carries roughly 4,000 chemicals. Instead, it uses ingredients like Propylene glycol (also known as vegetable glycerin), which is FDA approved and commonly used as a food additive, as well as water, nicotine, a scent that emulates real cigarette flavor and a membrane to suspend the ingredients.

Meanwhile, reports released by the FDA state that some electronic cigarettes do contain carcinogenic

a vapor-like smoke, just like a real cigarette though not nearly as smelly or invasive to those around you. There’s even an LED at the tip that glows when inhaling.

The starter kits typically include 5-10 refillable cartridges with varying levels of nicotine, from 24 mg (more than double

Many people who try the device say it’s an effective quitting tool— and actually manages to replicate the pleasure of taking a smoke break. ingredients like diethylene glycol, the poisonous compound found in antifreeze. As with any product, do you own research and contact the makers directly to see which ingredients are being used in their products.

Most e-cigs have a 2 to 3 piece design: a filter cartridge with a tiny plastic piece inside that holds a cotton-like sponge with the liquid nicotine solution, an atomizer unit that the filter cartridge slides onto, a rechargeable battery and charger. The atomizing chamber is the part that creates

18 JANUARY 27, 2011

what’s in the average cigarette) to zero mg (for when you’re really over the addiction and just want the habit).

Now let’s cut through to chase—you want to know if this new gadget really mimics the taste and feel of a cool menthol, rodeo Red or a hippie Spirit?

First, unlike nicotine patches and gum, electronic cigarettes are designed to be fun, as evidenced by the range of favors: coffee, chocolate, vanilla, strawberry, menthol and absolute tobacco. Everyone’s experience will be different, but many smokers say it’s

a remarkable approximation.

One local resident, who wished to remain anonymous, spoke about her experience with the e-cig and how it led her to quit a 10 year nicotine addiction— in a matter of months. “I loved the warm sensation, oral stimulation and ritualistic comfort the electronic cigarette offered me,” she said. “I didn’t enjoy it as much as the real thing, but it satisfied me enough to keep me away from the real thing— until I lost my drive to smoke altogether.”

There are hundreds of online retailers carrying the product, with prices ranging from $60 to $240. And there’s a store in the Queen Kaahumanu Center in Kahului

called Dream Electronic Cigarettes that offers basic starter sets for $85. Instead of refillable cartridges, they offer 10 ML bottles of VJuice.

The VJuice come in a variety of flavors including cotton candy, bubble gum and, for the tough guys, Camel and Marlboro. They charge $15 per bottle, which should last 2 weeks for the heavier smoker—equivalent to twoand-a-half cartons of cigarettes. And that can add up to health in another important place—your wallet. ■ To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1432m4

OK, We Lied... ...here are a few startling, lecture-y facts about smoking, courtesy of the American Cancer Society • Nearly 47 million Americans smoke tobbacco • Tobacco use accounts for at least 30 percent of all cancer deaths and 87 percent of lung cancer deaths • Each year, about 46,000 people die of heart disease and another 3,400 from lung cancer as a result of breathing secondhand smoke • Between 2000 and 2004, smoking caused more than $193 billion in annual health-related costs in the United States, including smokingattributable medical costs and productivity losses

Discover Mauiâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Healthy & Positive Living Magazine!

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MIND BODY SPIRIT

Words by Janet Kinosian

Sleep Thoughts Whether you’re an early bird or a night owl, the key is to accept your cycle—and make sure you get enough rest

d

“Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast.”

- Oscar Wilde

Dear Benjamin Franklin, with his infamous dictum “Early to bed, early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise,” branded the night owl—the other half of the circadian lifestyle—as somehow guilty of moral incertitude.

However, if you want sanity in your life, know who you are as a sleeper—a lark or an owl—and simply accept your nocturnal biology and that of your partner. Leave the moral-indulgency clause alone.

Larks (those who spring from bed in the early ayem with rabid enthusiasm) often do feel morally superior to owls (late-nighters who burn energy into wee hours and are asleep when the roosters crow). But research suggests genetics may have a good deal to do with it.

Stanford University sleep expert Emmanuel Mignot theorizes that a mutation on chromosome 4—the “clock” gene—plays a big role in your preference for morning or evening life. Larks may seem gruesomely alert and perky at unconscionable hours, and owls seem moody, a bit lazy and rhythmically off balance, but neither is really true.

He says both larks and owls show a normal circadian rhythm, but their cycles differ, with owls’ cycles peaking about 2 hours later than larks’. This difference occurs in all physical cycles, including the daily rise and fall of body temperature and the increase and decrease in various hormones. It’s simply biology.

According to Michael Smolensky, Ph.D. and Lynne Lamber, authors of The Body Clock, Larks and Owls report the following in terms of alter-ness, productivity, mood, temperature, sleep and wake patterns, etc. Look and see where you may fall: [Larks to left / Owls to right] Most Alert: Noon/ 6pm Most productive: Late morning/Late morning, and late evening Most active: Around 2:30pm/ Around 5:30pm Best mood: Between 9am and 4pm/ Steady rise from about 8am-10pm Temperature highest: Around 3:30pm/Around 8pm Age: Most persons over age 60/Most college students and 20-somethings Bedtime: Go to bed 2 hours earlier than owls; fall asleep faster/ More variable bedtimes; stay up later on weekends and holidays Wake time: Awaken at desired time/

20 JANUARY 27, 2011

Awaken about same time as larks on workdays, 1-2 hours later on days off Use of alarm clock: Don’t need it/Need multiple alarms Temperature lowest: Around 3:30am/ Around 6am Quality of sleep: Lifelong, sleep more soundly; wake up more refreshed, usually 3.4 hours after temperature minimum, daily low point on body clock/Lifelong: get less sleep; wake up sleepier, usually 2.5 hours after temperature minimum Nap: Rarely take more and longer naps/ fall asleep more easily in daytime Mid-sleep time: Around 3:30am/Around 6am Favorite exercise time: Morning/Evening Peak heart rate: Around 11am/Around 6pm Lowest heart rate: Around 3am/ Around 7am Mood: Mood declines slightly over day/ Mood rises substantially over day Morning behavior: Chatty/Bearish Evening behavior: Out of steam/Full of energy Meal times: Eat breakfast 1-2 hours earlier than owls/Often skip breakfast; eat other meals at same times as larks on work days, 90 minutes later on days off Favorite meal: Breakfast/Dinner

Daily caffeine use: Cups/Pots Shift work adaptability: Work best on day shifts/Work best on evening shifts; tolerate night and rotating shift work better Travel: More jet lag/Adapt faster to time zone changes, particularly going west Peak melatonin secretion: About 3:30am/About 5:30am Either way, whether lark or owl, you will still need the similar required amount of sleep—about seven to eight hours. And if you try to push yourself too hard against your nature (getting up early for owls, staying up late for larks), you won’t be well-rested even with that number, say sleep experts.

If you must make an adjustment, experts say what will help are tricks that reset the biological clock as when trying to counter jet-lag: get outside in the sunlight early after awakening; have a warm breakfast (a meal many owls skip) and exercise earlier in the day rather than later in the afternoon or evening.

It’s best, of course, if partners are paired alike—two larks or two owls—because they innately understand each other’s rhythms. But if you’re not, the best course of action is to stop judging, being irritated by it, feeling or dispensing guilt—and, most important, trying to alter yourself.

This last activity causes much useless stress.

Of course, if you’re an owl and must wake early for work, you can, as mentioned above, accustom yourself to the circadian change. But if you still don’t spring as peppy as other 5am’ers, even after years of trying, accept that it’s just fine. (It’s interesting; few larks ever feel the need to work themselves over into night owls.) Accept that your partner is just fine the way they are, too.

I know this one through experience.

I am without a doubt a night owl; my mother, the ultimate lark. All during my school years I suffered in stunned silence as my mother would enter my room, fling open the drapes, and shout, “Good morning! Isn’t it a beautiful day!” after having walked several miles, made breakfast and had hours of productivity.

She’d regale me with stories from all the other larks she gabbed with on her walk.

Unconscious, I’d hide until she shut the door. Why? Probably because I believed larkishness was better than owlishness, and who was I not to be taught this lesson?

That all changed when I got to college and learned the art of late to bed, late to rise makes a wise woman whatever she wants. ■ To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1432m5

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Âť continued from pg.12 being it warms your muscles and prevents injury. He said that since our bodies are made up of mostly water, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s logical to cycle it through by the natural process of sweating. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It also stimulates the organs, glands and nerves and moves fresh, oxygenated blood throughout the entire body.â&#x20AC;?

Every Bikram class is standardized (not just at their studio, but anywhere in the world), so you endure the same process no matter where or when you go to practice.

Each of the 26 poses is done twice and concludes with a minute of Lamazeesque exhalations called the â&#x20AC;&#x153;Breath of Fire.â&#x20AC;? For me, the first half with standing poses like Dandayamana-Bibhaktapada Paschimotthanasanaâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;which, among other things, is supposed to be good for â&#x20AC;&#x153;psychotic depressionsâ&#x20AC;? and â&#x20AC;&#x153;abdominal obesityâ&#x20AC;?â&#x20AC;&#x201D;were the hardest (go figure).

My head spun, my knees quaked and everything hurt from the arches of my feet to my eyeballs.

Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re supposed to keep your eyes open, but that was the hardest part. I couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t help but close them every time I thought I was

22 JANUARY 27, 2011

going to tip over, but the classâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s teacherâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;a cool gal named Joy who told me she broke her neck in a car accident and in just a few short years since discovering Bikram went from immobile to instructorâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;would gently remind me to keep them open so as to stay engaged. â&#x20AC;&#x153;You might feel dizzy, you might feel nauseousâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s OK,â&#x20AC;? Joy said. And sure enough, when I stuck to it, I could do it. My eyes uncrossed, my knees steadied, and I focused past the discomfort.

Afterward, it was weird. I was exhausted but exhilarated. I was drenched in sweat but felt clean. I felt like dying and yet hadnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t felt that alive in a long time. And weirder still, I no longer felt a master of my so-called Marlboro mudra. Because no way in hell was I going to negate 90 minutes of self-inflicted pain for a threeminute cancer stick (I managed to hold out until the next morning).

OK, so Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not kicking my old bad habits just yet. But I think I may have found a new bad-ass habit worth sticking to. â&#x2013; To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1432m1

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TAX SEASON IS HERE! $

99 X* TA u t rn

MIND BODY SPIRIT » continued from pg.16 suggested a breakfast of sprouted grain English muffins with scrambled tofu and fruit jam. Lunch possibilities were falafel in whole wheat pita or udon with tofu and green salad. Dinner was French white bean stew, sweet potato salad and artisan bread.

The surprise was the chocolate cake. Sweets made with natural ingredients are not

ome

Re elc ins w alk-

shunned, but rather eaten sparingly.

Far from intimidating me, that list of options made my mouth water. I won’t promise I’ll never eat another packaged potato chip, but if I am what I eat, I think I want to be more like a macrobiotic practitioner. ■ To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1432m3

w

Try It At Home Cranberry Quinoa Pilaf SALAD

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~PHYSICAL

INTRODUCING

2 cups water 1 cup quinoa Pinch of salt ¾ cup pecans, pistachios, or almonds, lightly toasted and coarsely chopped 3-4 scallions, sliced in thin rounds 1 carrot, grated or finely diced 1/3 cup celery, finely diced 1/3 cup parsley, finely chopped ½ cup dried cranberries (unsweetened or fruit sweetened)

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DRESSING 2 tsp organic cold pressed extra virgin olive oil Dash of shoyu 1 tsp unrefined sesame oil T fresh organic lemon juice ¼ tsp umeboshi vinegar 2 tsp rice vinegar Dash of organic black pepper

Bring water to a boil in a pot. Add quinoa and a pinch of salt. Cover, turn to low, and cook for 20 minutes. Place into a bowl and allow to cool. Place pecans in a dry skillet and heat over medium flame until fragrant and slightly toasted. Set aside to cool.

Combine all dressing ingredients in a large mixing bowl. Add scallions, celery, parsley, and cranberries. Set aside. Chop the pecans into bite sized pieces. When quinoa is cool, add the dressing, vegetables, and pecans, and stir well. Add seasoning to taste. Salad is best if set aside for at least an hour to allow flavors to blend.

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24 JANUARY 27, 2011

.com

THE

FASHION ISSUE

IS ALMOST HERE! From skimpy bathing suits to flowing dresses and everything in between, Maui is a haven for casual yet chic fashion.

Our annual ode to garments looks at the hottest trends and the local shops where you can find them.

CALL & RESERVE YOUR SPACE TODAY! DEADLINE: FEB. 18 TH PUBLISHES: FEB. 24 TH To reserve space contact: Brad at 808-283-3260 or brad@mauitime.com Tommy at 808-283-0512 or tommy@mauitime.com

PHOTO BY SEAN MICHAEL HOWER

JANUARY 27, 2011 25

BY BARRY WURST II

FILM

barry@mauitime.com

All the ‘Way’ Harrowing WWII survivalist tale pulls no punches The Way Back

★★★★★

Rated R/132 min.

P

eter Weir’s first film in seven years is a tough, often grueling and tremendously moving portrait of human lives put under enormous pressure.

Loosely based on a true story (a 1956 memoir that’s still being investigated for authenticity), the film stars Jim Sturgess as a man who stages a prison break from a Siberian internment camp in 1939 and leads a cluster of escapees on an epic trek through the Himalayans and into India. Weir, the brilliant Australian director who gave us The Truman Show, Witness and Dead Poets Society (to name just a few), portrays a brotherhood that is formed over a monumental quest.

We’re meant to believe that the men cover more than 4,000 miles on foot and survive blizzards, carnivorous wildlife, sand

storms and heat stroke. The problem isn’t with credibility—the story never feels false or sensational, a testament to the power of the performances, Weir’s no-nonsense direction and the extraordinary scenery, derived from extensive filming in Morocco, Bulgaria, India and Australia. Sturgess, cast as a Paul McCartney fill-in in Across the Universe, finally gives a performance that lives up to his hype as a leading man.

He’s intense, barely recognizable and his character’s insatiable need to keep going makes him the tireless, unquestioned leader of the pack. Ed Harris is as wonderful and prickly as you’d expect and Saorise Ronan does a lot with a crucial second-act character, but the nicest surprise is Colin Ferrell, whose Irish brogue vanishes behind a pitch-perfect Russian accent.

Burkhard Dallwitz’s powerful score is used sparingly, with many scenes effectively devoid of a soundtrack (the unsettling prison camp sequences would have been undermined by the comfort of music). If the film has any flaw, it’s that the men on this journey aren’t fully fleshed-out as characters,

If brooding were bullets, the war would be over.

but the film addresses this in an interesting way; despite walking thousands of miles together, these guys don’t do a lot of talking and only when they’re on the edge of death do they offer comfort and a listening ear.

Weir hasn’t made a film since 2003’s Master and Commander and his presence has been missed. His latest is typically unsentimental, brutal and rewarding—but walk in expecting a compelling character

study, not an action movie.

As with all great survivalist tales, you’ll find yourself clutching your popcorn, thinking of it as a bag of “rations” to save.

And the ending will turn even the most cynical moviegoers into weeping piles of tear-soaked poi. ■ To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1432f

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Showtimes

WHERE AND WHEN TO WATCH WHAT

FRONT STREET THEATER

MAUI MALL MEGAPLEX

900 Front Street, Lahaina, 249-2222 (Matinees) The Dilemma - PG13 - THU (3:45), 6:30, 9:15. FRI (3:40), 7:05, 9:15. SATSUN (1:00), 3:40, 7:05, 9:15. MON-WED (3:40), 7:05, 9:15.

Gulliver’s Travels (2D) - PG - THU (3:35), 6:30, 9:00.

No Strings Attached - R - THU (4:15), 7:00, 9:30. FRI (4:20), 7:15, 9:30.

SAT-SUN (1:45), 4:20, 7:15, 9:30. MON-WED (4:20), 7:15, 9:30.

The Rite - PG13 - FRI (4:15), 7:00, 9:45. SAT-SUN (1:30), 4:15, 7:00, 9:45.

MON-WED (4:15), 7:00, 9:45.

True Grit - PG13 - THU (4:00), 6:45, 9:30. FRI (3:45), 7:10, 9:20. SAT-SUN (1:15), 3:45, 7:10, 9:20. MON-WED (3:45), 7:10, 9:20.

Maui Mall, 249-2222 (Matinees) The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader (3D) - PG - THU-FRI (1:40, 4:15), 6:55, 9:35. SAT-SUN (1:40), 4:15, 6:55, 9:35. MONWED (1:40, 4:15), 6:55, 9:35.

Evangelion 2.0 (Sony Digital) - Unrated - THU (2:20, 4:40), 7:00, 9:20.

The Fighter - R - THU-FRI (1:25, 4:05), 6:45, 9:25. SAT-SUN (1:25), 4:05, 6:45, 9:25. MON-WED (1:25, 4:05), 6:45, 9:25.

Gulliver’s Travels (3D) - PG - THU-FRI (2:15, 4:35), 6:50, 9:05. SAT-SUN (12:05, 2:15) 4:35, 6:50, 9:05. MON-WED (2:15, 4:35), 6:50, 9:05.

How Do You Know - PG13 - THU-FRI (1:35, 4:20), 7:10, 9:50. SAT-SUN (1:35), 4:20, 7:10, 9:50. MON-WED (1:35, 4:20), 7:10, 9:50.

Little Fockers - PG13 - THU-FRI (2:40, 5:05), 7:25, 9:45. SAT-SUN (12:15, 2:40, 5:05), 7:25, 9:45. MON-WED (2:40, 5:05), 7:25, 9:45.

No Strings Attached - R - THU-FRI (1:55, 4:30), 7:05, 9:40. SAT-SUN (1:55), 4:30, 7:05, 9:40. MON-WED (1:55, 4:30), 7:05, 9:40.

Season of the Witch - PG13 - THU-FRI (2:50, 5:10), 7:30, 9:50. SAT-SUN (12:30, 2:50) 5:10, 7:30, 9:50. MON-WED (2:50, 5:10), 7:30, 9:50.

Tangled (2D) - PG - THU-FRI (2:25, 4:50), 7:15, 9:40. SAT-SUN (12:00, 2:25), 4:50, 7:15, 9:40. MON-WED (2:25, 4:50), 7:15, 9:40.

True Grit - PG13 - THU-FRI (1:30, 4:05), 6:40, 9:15. SAT-SUN (1:30), 4:05, 6:40, 9:15. MON-WED (1:30, 4:05), 6:40, 9:15.

The Way Back - PG13 - THU-FRI (3:15), 6:15, 9:15. SAT-SUN (12:15, 3:15), 6:15, 9:15. MON-WED (3:15), 6:15, 9:15.

Yogi Bear (3D) - PG - THU-FRI (2:25, 4:30), 6:35, 8:40. SAT-SUN (12:20, 2:25), 4:30, 6:35, 8:40. MON-WED (2:25, 4:30), 6:35, 8:40.

KA’AHUMANU 6 Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center, 1-800-326-3264 (Matinees: everyday until 4pm) Black Swan - R - THU-WED 11:40, 2:05, 4:30, 7:05, 9:30.

The Dilemma - PG13 - THU-WED 11:30, 2:00, 4:40, 7:10, 9:40.

The Green Hornet (2D) - PG13 - THU-WED 11:45, 2:10, 4:35, 7:00, 9:25.

THU 12:45, 3:10, 5:35, 8:00. FRI-SUN 12:45, 3:10, 5:35, 8:00, 10:25. MONWED 12:45, 3:10, 5:35, 8:00.

The King’s Speech - R - THU-WED 11:50, 2:20, 4:45, 7:15, 9:45.

The Rite - PG13 - FRI-TUE 11:55, 2:25, 4:55, 7:25, 9:55. WED 11:00, 2:25, 4:55, 7:25, 9:55.

Tron: Legacy (2D) - PG - THU 12:00, 2:40, 5:20, 8:05.

KUKUI MALL 1819 South Kihei Road, 1-800-326-3264 (Matinees: everyday until 4pm) The Green Hornet (2D) - PG13 - THU 2:10, 3:35, 6:00, 8:25.

The King’s Speech - R - THU 1:00, 3:25, 5:50, 8:15. FRI-SAT 11:50, 2:20, 4:50, 7:15, 9:45. SUN 11:50, 2:20, 4:50, 7:15. MON-WED 1:05, 3:25, 5:50, 8:15.

The Rite - PG13 - FRI-SAT 11:30, 2:05, 4:35, 7:20, 9:50. SUN 1:30, 2:05, 4:35, 7:20. MON-WED 1:10, 3:50, 6:25, 8:55.

The Social Network - PG13 - FRI-SAT 11:35, 2:10, 4:45, 7:30, 9:55. SUN 11:35, 2:10, 4:45, 7:30. MON-WED 1:00, 3:40, 6:15, 8:50.

The Tourist - PG13 - THU 1:05, 3:45, 6:15, 8:35.

True Grit - PG13 - THU 1:10, 3:40, 6:10, 8:30. FRI-SAT 12:00, 2:25, 4:55, 7:25, 9:40. SUN 12:00, 2:25, 4:55, 7:25, 9:40. MON-WED 1:15, 3:45, 6:20, 8:40.

WHARF CINEMA CENTER 658 Front Street, 249-2222 (Matinees) The Green Hornet (2D) - PG13 - THU-FRI (1:15, 4:00), 7:00, 9:45. SAT-SUN (1:15), 4:00, 7:00, 9:45. MON-WED (1:15, 4:00), 7:00, 9:45.

Little Fockers - PG13 - THU (1:00, 3:35), 6:30, 9:00.

The Mechanic - R - FRI (1:30, 4:15), 7:15, 9:50. SAT-SUN (1:30), 4:15, 7:15, 9:50. MON-WED (1:30, 4:15), 7:15, 9:50.

Season of the Witch - PG13 - THU (1:15, 3:45), 6:45, 9:15. FRI (1:00, 3:35), 6:45, 9:15. SAT-SUN (1:00), 3:35, 6:45, 9:15. MON-WED (1:00, 3:35), 6:45, 9:15.

Schaefer International Gallery Wed - Sun 11 am-5 pm

New This Week

Gallery Exhibit

THE MECHANIC - R - Action - Either about an old guy in greasy overalls who fixes carburetors or an elite international assassin. Same difference, right? 108 min.

THE GREEN HORNET - PG13 Action - Seth Rogen takes a break from smoking weed and impregnating hot chicks to play a superhero. 110 min.

THE SOCIAL NETWORK - PG13 - Drama - Hey, you know that little Web site all the kids are talking about? Here’s the (alleged) story of how it was born. 133 min.

THE RITE - PG13 - Thriller - A priest goes to exorcism school, where homework is hell. Anthony Hopkins stars. 114 min.

GULLIVER’S TRAVELS - PG - Comedy, Fantasy - Jonathan Swift’s 18th century adventure gets an update, Jack Black-style. Next up: Will Ferrell as Captain Nemo. 85 min.

TANGLED - PG - Animated - Running out of fairy tales to sprinkle with empowering modern messages and pop culture references, Hollywood turns to Rapunzel. 115 min.

NOW SHOWING BLACK SWAN - R - Drama, Horror - Thought ballet was all pointe shoes and demi-pliés?

Think again. Natalie Portman stars. 109 min.

THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: VOYAGE OF THE DAWN TREADER - PG - Fantasy Pasty-faced British kids and CGI animals hit the high seas in the third film installment of C.S. Lewis’s beloved series. 115 min.

THE DILEMMA - PG13 - Alleged Comedy - What do you do when you catch your best friend’s wife smooching a dude who’s not your best friend? If you’re Vince Vaughn, you go apeshit. 111 min.

EVANGELION 2.0 - Animated - Sci fi, Action - Government experiments and other weird/nefarious things meld in this acclaimed Japanese import. 108 min.

THE FIGHTER - R - Drama - A working class boxer nicknamed “Irish” (code, as ever, for “white”) fights for respect in and out of the ring.

Mark Wahlberg and Christian Bale star. 116 min.

HOW DO YOU KNOW - PG13 - Comedy Owen Wilson, Reese Witherspoon and Paul Rudd form a love triangle, with Jack Nicholson thrown in to screw up the geometry. 136 min.

THE KING’S SPEECH - R - Drama - A stuttering monarch finds his voice in time to call out Hitler. Colin Firth and Geoffrey Rush star (neither as Hitler). 118 min.

LITTLE FOCKERS - PG13 - Comedy Apparently two movies weren’t enough for Ben Stiller and Bob De Niro to work out their issues.

And now there are kids involved. 83 min.

NO STRINGS ATTACHED - R - Comedy, Romance - A guy and a girl agree to keep it strictly physical—until some of their other organs demand to get in on the action. Natalie Portman and Ashton Kutcher star. 108 min.

SEASON OF THE WITCH - PG13 - Action, Fantasy - Nick Cage dons flowing locks to play a 14th century knight. Also involves plagues and magic and stuff. 110 min.

THE TOURIST - PG13 - Drama Smoldering good looks and vague accents collide as Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie share the screen. The plot? Come on, you don’t care about the plot. 104 min.

TRON LEGACY - PG - Action - A sequel 28 years in the making. Strap yourselves in, geeks, and enjoy the ride. 141 min.

TRUE GRIT - PG13 - Western - The Coen Brothers update the John Wayne classic (though they insist it’s based on the book) with Jeff Bridges donning the eye patch. 110 min.

THE WAY BACK - R - Drama, Historical WWII prisoners escape a Siberian prison and try to walk 4,000 miles to safety. And we complain when Twitter goes down. 132 min.

YOGI BEAR 3D - PG - Family, Animated - An existential meditation on love, yearning and the meaning of picnic baskets. 98 min.

THE LEGACY OF LAND

-DQXDU\ )HEUXDU\

UPCOMING SHOWS Hawai i’s Guitar Hero

SOLO SESSIONS: MAKANA 6$7 681 -$1 SP “Classical Sampler”

MAUI POPS ORCHESTRA 681 -$1 &DVWOH SP NPR’s host of “From the Top”

CHRISTOPHER O’RILEY, PIANO AND CARTER BREY, CELLO 7+85 )(% &DVWOH SP Upcountry Maui Son

SOLO SESSIONS: JEFF PETERSON

)5, )(% 0F&R\ SP Box Office: 10 AM - 3M MO1 - SAT

242-SHOW .MauiArts.

7469

WWW

ORG

The Maui Arts & Cultural Center is a 501(c)3 nRnSrRÀt RrJani]atiRn PaGe SRssiEle E\ the JenerRsit\ RI SeRSle ZhR lRYe Maui

JANUARY 27, 2011 27

PICKS

This Week's Picks

DIVERSIONS, DALLIANCES & DATES

Gainful Enjoyment Thursday (January 27)-Sunday (January 30), Iao Theater, Wailuku, $5/$10

W

e’ve said it before and we’ll say it again: Get A Job is the best fictional feature film ever produced in our islands. A polished independent endeavor starring friends, family and famous Mauians, Get A Job is a raucous romp through the Valley Isle that follows the antics of two dichotomous heroes (played by Willie K and Eric Gilliom) whose worlds collide.

Just as fun is the fact that the fine folks behind the film are masters of pono promotion— and know how to party. A follow-up to their already legendary MACC premier, this weekend’s 13 showtimes—spread out over four days at the historic Iao Theater—is not to be missed. Rub elbows with cast and crew members who’ll be around to sign autographs and partake in special postscreening Q&A sessions (after every 5pm show), plus listen in on Thursday for radio shows on KAOI 91.5FM (7:15pm) and Q103 (9:15pm). Considering this film has the potential to kick-start our local movie-making industry, it’d be wise to scoop official movie merchandise like T-shirts designed by Maui Thing, CDs, the official movie poster and a special poster commemorating this first-time theatrical run (and if you want to get really into it, go to multiple showings to collect the unique tickets for each screening... brownie points for getting a Friday at 7:15pm MauiTime ticket—enter to win some at mauitime.com). Of course, you can’t party without ono grinds and libations. So the burgeoning beer garden that’s given Wailuku First Fridays (and Market Street at large) such a brewtiful bump is opening up on Friday and Saturday (4-9:30pm), teaming with Cafe O‘Lei to offer a custom menu. A comfortable seating section for the whole ‘ohana will be housed on the makai side of the garden, and on the mauka end those 21+ can enjoy beers like Stella and Shock Top, and a selection of wines from house to ultra-premium reds and whites. Best of all, beer garden proceeds benefit Maui OnStage. Plus, check out Wailuku Coffee Co. for extended cafe hours (Thursday & Friday 7am-7pm). Tickets are going fast, so get them in person at Maui Thing or online at getajobthemovie.com.

A Portion of the ProFeeGV to EeneÀt the JUNIOR LIFEGUARD PROGRAM ON ALL ISLANDS

ARE SENDING YOU TO DEFTONES!

DEFTONES “The Nine Time Grammy Award Winning Kings of Texas Swing” Asleep At The Wheel will be performing on a four island tour in Hawaii. Head Honcho and Band Leader Ray Benson is joined by band mates Jason Roberts, David Sanger, David Miller, John Michael Whitby, Eddie Rivers and Elizabeth McQueen.

Feb. 4, Fri. - Maui

Maui Arts & Cultural Center -Castle Theatre Show: 7:30 pm

On Oahu at

ALOHA

WIN A PAIR OF

Friday,

& AIRFARE

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Feb. 18

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TICKETS: | Charge by Phone: 808-896-4845| Online @ www.LazarBear.com | Kauai: Kauai Music & Sound - Kapaa; Hanalei Surf Company - Hanalei; Progressive Expressions - Koloa; Scotty’s Music - Kalaheo; Aloha-N-Paradise - Waimea; Kauai Harley Davidson - Puhi | Maui: MA&& Box OfÀce 808-242-SHOW (7469) or at www.mauiarts.com | Oahu: Liquor Collection - Honolulu; Hungry Ear - Kailua; Good Guys Music - Kapahulu; 5ainbow BooNs - 8niversity; Hawaii Natural High - WaiNiNi; MW5 - Kunia; www.honoluluboxofÀce.com 808-550-845 | Big Island: CD Wizard - Hilo; Hilo Music Exchange - Hilo; Music Exchange - Waimea; Sound Wave Music - Kailua Kona; Taro Gifts - Honokoa

28 JANUARY 27, 2011

MAUITIME.COM/CONTE STS winner announced 2/14/2011

FOR MORE INTER - ISLAND CONCERT TRAVEL PACKAGES VISIT

BAMPPROJECT.COM

*18 years or older to enter, no purchase necessary Brought to you by BAMP, MauiTime & go! Mokulele Airlines

BY ANU YAGI anu@mauitime.com + @anuheayagi on Twitter

Laying Down The Spa

Shake, Battle & Roll

Friday (January 28) 8pm, Spa Grande, Grand Wailea, $60 adults / $30 keiki 6-12

Thursday (February 4), 9pm-12am, Hard Rock Cafe, Lahaina

Mauiâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s most elegant and well-known spa hosts an evening of socializing and pampering especially for the ladies.

Indulgent dips, sips, eats and sweets combine for a decadent night thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll help you discover your inner diva.

The world-famous TermĂŠ Wailea Hydrotherapy circuit will be available to soak away your stresses; plus, partake in special chocolate-scented mini spa treatments. And whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the fun in salving yourself in chocolate if you canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t eat it, too? Sacchariferous offerings include truffles, caramels, candies and chocolate fondue. For the svelte-conscious, the Botero Bar will offer a selection of scrumptious skinnytinisâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;each under 150 caloriesâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;like the bellitini, creamsicle and pure sunshine. Add a special menu of dainty eats including artisan cheeses, crab quesadillas and tapas and this event would almost be worth it for the food and drink alone. But thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s moreâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;including a fashion show and live entertainmentâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;at this inaugural installment of what will be an ongoing series, slated for the final Friday of each month. If all that girly goodness gets you in the mood to shop, Seyana Jewelry will satiate your urges with a trunk show, and youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll receive 20 percent off retail purchases at the spa. Plusâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;yes, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s moreâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be a Brighton charm giveaway and every guest gets a goodie bag. Grandwailea.com [Jen Russo]

When I think of musical battles, I think of the last scene in 8 Mile, when Eminem locks himself in a bathroom before a show in an attempt to restrain his nerves. Onstage, he proceeds to â&#x20AC;&#x153;lose himselfâ&#x20AC;? completely to rhyme and rhythm, as he captivates the audience with his lyrical ingenuity. Switch the tune from rap to rock, and Marshall Bruce Mathers III to Maui band, and weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll soon see similar victory on the West side (hopefully without the bathroom breakdown). And if the winning bandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s got the chops, theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve got a chance to go all the way to Londonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Hyde Park for a global battle of the bands in honor of Hard Rock Internationalâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 40th anniversary. This is how it works: Local competition kicks off next week Thursday (February 4) with Better than Nothing (9-9:45pm), Mojomana (10-10:45pm) and Arise (11-11:45pm) duking it out for the nightâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s crown.

The tournament continues the following Friday (February 11), with a TBA band (99:45pm), Panacea (10-10:45pm) and Sleeping Elephant (11-11:45pm) squaring off.

Then, Minor Setback (9-9:45pm), MOTH (10-10:45pm) and Sounds of Addiction (11-11:45pm) cross axes on Friday, February 18 (the latter two bands facing an interesting rematch from a heated BOTB at Mulligans on the Blue last year). The winning band from each of these nights will go head to head in a final showdown on Friday, March 4â&#x20AC;&#x201D;with the overall winner ascending to regional competition (one of four worldwide). Regional winners get flown to London on the Hard Rockâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dime for Hard Rock Calling 2011 (June 24-26), and the rest will be rock history. 667-2578, hardrock.com [Dali Singh]

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JANUARY 27, 2011 29

LIVE MUSIC ON THE NORTHSHORE!

BY ANU YAGI

CALENDAR

anu@mauitime.com + @anuheayagi on Twitter

Da Kine Calendar THURSDAY JAN 27

WAVETRAIN s pm

FRIDAY JAN 28

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WEDNESDAY FEB 2

THERAPY NIGHT!

W/DJ BOOMSHOT & SPECIAL GUESTS! 10PM $5 · $2).+ 30%#)!, 7%,, BOOKING INFO: DYINGSONS@GMAIL.COM

142 HANA HWY, PAIA

808-573-8085

www.charleysmaui.com

“home of the $1 mai tai” Kihei’s BEST Sunset Cocktail Spot!

AUTHENTIC MEXICAN FOOD BURGERS SALADS Live Music Daily Sunset Happy Hour 3-7 Nightly Entertainment

RAMPAGE

THURSDAY 27 9pm

KIHEI’S LEGENDARY WEEKLY REGGAE DANCE PARTY

DAT GUYZ KEALO AND BAND PLAYING ALL THE ISLAND FAVORITES

HI RIZ COOL ROCK STEADY ROOTS BAND

FRIDAY 28 9pm

SATURDAY 29 9pm

KARAOKE INDUSTRY NIGHT

SUNDAY 30 9pm

KARAOKE

MONDAY 31 9pm

HAPPY HOUR PRICES ALL DAY!!

KARAOKE CONTEST $1 TACOS $3 CORONAS $3 CUERVO SHOTS

TUESDAY 1 9pm

WEDNESDAY 2 9pm GET UP & JAM OR WATCH THE

OPEN MIC RISING STARS

1913 S Kihei Rd 808.891.8010 ACROSS FROM FOODLAND

30 JANUARY 27, 2011

BIG SHOWS

900 Front St., Lahaina; 808-667-7400; hardrock.com

“GET A JOB” - Thu, Jan 27 - Sun, Jan 30. The first theatrical run of this homegrown flick, starring 175 Mauians you know and love. Read on to the Events section for each day’s showtime details, and see This Week’s Picks for more. $5 / $10. Iao Theater, 68 N. Market St., Wailuku; Tickets on sale online or at Maui Thing: 808-249-0215; getajobthemovie.com

ASLEEP AT THE WHEEL - Fri, Feb 4. Comprised of Ray Benson, Jason Roberts, David Sanger, David Miller, John Michael Whitby, Eddie Rivers and Elizabeth McQueen, this Western-swing, boogie and roots outfit celebrates its 40th anniversary. $45 / $50 / $55.

7:30 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org

BATTLEFIELD BAND - Thu, Jan 27. Inspired by their rich Celtic heritage and fueled by Scotland’s modern day music scene, this band style fuses the use of ancient and modern instruments, including bagpipes, fiddle, synthesizer, guitar, flutes, bodhran (hand drum), accordion and more. $12 / $25 / $35.

7:30 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org

SOLO SESSIONS WITH JEFF PETERSON - Fri, Feb 4. Maui boy Jeff Peterson — who did the Valley Isle proud at last year’s Na Hoku Hanohano Awards — is next-billed for this intimate song/storytelling series at the MACC. VIP includes post-show meet and greet with Peterson. $25 / $45 VIP. 7:30 p.m. McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org

MAUI SLAM POETRY’S “BEATNIKS BEATS NIGHT” - Thu, Jan 27. “(A) generation of crazy, illuminated hipsters suddenly rising and roaming America, serious, bumming and hitchhiking everywhere, ragged, beatific, beautiful in an ugly graceful new way,” wrote Jack Kerouac. OK. So we’re a little bit more The Tweet Generation than The Beat Generation, but we’re still beatific and beautiful. So go and get your slam on, and help define OUR new way. You dig? $10 ($5 before 9:30pm). 9:30 p.m. Casanova, 1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao; 808-572-0220; casanovamaui.com

JUDY’S GANG IN “SHAKE YOUR BODY” - Sat, Feb 5. More than 120 footloose and fancy free dancers — from toddlers to senior citizens — take to the stage in this special, annual two-hour dance revue. $14 / $10 keiki (6-12) & seniors / Free for keiki under 5.

7 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org

PETER ROWAN & DAVE NELSON BAND - Fri, Jan 28. Fri & Sat, Jan 28 & 29. Playing roots, rock n’ roll and psychedelic country-rock, these dudes know how to party. $25 adavance / $30 door. 8:30 p.m.

Stella Blues Cafe, 1279 South Kihei Rd., # 201, Kihei; 808-874-3779; stellablues.com 10TH ANNUAL MAUI COATAL LAND TRUST “BUY BACK THE BEACH LU’AU” - Sat, Jan 28. Inspired by the work of the MCLT, highlighted in last week’s cover story. Want to know how you can support them? It’s easy (and fun): Attend their 10th annual event featuring performances from the Old Lahaina Luau dancers, food from eight superstar chefs, entertainment from Barry Flanagan with Eric Gilliom and a conservation-themed auction. $150. 5:30pm.

Old Lahaina Luau, 1251 Front St., Lahaina; 808-2445263; mauicoastallandtrust.org MAUI POPS ORCHESTRA’S CLASSICAL SAMPLER - Sun, Jan 30. Mmm... With music by master composers Mozart, Brahms and Beethoven, it’s like a pupu platter of classical ear candy. Also, special guest Sara Buechner performs Beethoven’s Piano Concerto No. 4. $10 / $21 / $26 / $41. 3:30 p.m.

Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org SOLO SESSIONS WITH MAKANA - Sun, Jan 30. This sultry slack-keyist is next on the MACC’s Solo Sessions bill — an intimate night of music and storytelling. Ladies (and gents, too), start your engines. $25 / $45. 7:30 p.m. McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org

TICKETS ON SALE CHRISTOPHER O’RILEY & CARTER BREY - Thu, Feb 3. Pianist Christopher O’Riley, host of NPR’s prodigyloving show “From the Top,” is joined by the New York Philharmonic’s principal cellist, Carter Brey. $12 / $28 / $35. 7:30 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org SAVE THE DATE(S): BATTLE OF THE BANDS - Hard Rock is giving local bands the chance at a trip to play a big gig in London. Three tourney rounds on February 4, 11 & 18 culminate with a March 4 final — winner goes on to regional competition (and pockets $500).

See This Week’s Picks for more. The Hard Rock Cafe,

IMAGO THEATER’S ZOOZOO - Thu, Feb 10. The witty, wonderful and wordless cavorting of giant dinosaurs, anteaters, penguins, polar bears and hitch-hiking rabbits. Acid flashbacks? No. It’s Imago Theater’s imaginative stage show, sure to delight keiki and kupuna alike. $12 / $28 / $38. 7:30 p.m.

Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org KEALI’I REICHEL: KUKAHI 2011 WITH HALAU KE’ALAOKAMAILE - Sat, Feb 12. Naturally, an award-winning traditional and contemporary entertainer is at the helm of an award-winning hula halau. And naturally, their performances (this, their annual fundraiser) are naught but winning. Plus, a second show on February 13. $12 / $35 / $45 / $55.

7:30 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org MAUI HUMANE SOCIETY’S ANNUAL FUR BALL - Sat, Feb 19. With the 2011 event theme “The Canine Canteen: Swing the Night Away,” this beloved fundraising event will honor the animals, men and women who have served our country in the armed forces. Tickets and sponsorships now available.

Grand Wailea Resort & Spa, Haleakala Ballroom, 3850 Wailea Alanui Dr., Wailea; 808-877-3680 ext 32; mauihumanesociety.org SIR ELTON JOHN WITH BAND - Thu, Feb 24. For the “love of the common people,” Sir Elton John with band has added a second show, scheduled a day before the first (sold-out) concert (Friday, January 25). $77 / $97 / $152 / $252. 7 p.m. The Yokouchi Pavillion, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 808242-7469; mauiarts.org

PRODUCER’S CHOICE: “CATS” - Daily. Maui’s own take on this well-known musical composed by Andrew Lloyd Webber with lyrics by T. S. Eliot and Trevor Nunn. Adopt a look like the cat who got the creme by securing your tickets early (sales begin January 15). Iao Theater, 68 N. Market St., Wailuku; 808-242-6969; mauionstage.com

STAGE PROARTS’S SPRING SEASON AUDITIONS - Auditions slated for Saturday, February 5 — and there’s no better time than now to start preparing! Shows include “Rats! The Pied Piper Musical,” “Snow White and the 3 ½ Dwarves,” and “Driving Miss Daisy.” Auditions are for singers, actors and dancers ages 14 and up. Please bring your current résumé and headshot, plus prepare a 2 minute vocal selection. Call to schedule an audition appointment or more information. 10 a.m.-3 p.m. Pro-Arts Playhouse, 1280 S. Kihei Rd, Kihei; 808-463-6520; proartspacific.com CIRQUE POLYNESIA - Mon-Sat. It’s Circue du Soleil meets Polynesian hula with amazing high-wire acts, aerial acrobatics and illusions, and mind-boggling contortionist and balancing-acts. Call for their Kama’aina special. Starting at $62; Deals for kids. 6 p.m. Hyatt Regency Maui Resort & Spa, 200 Nohea Kai Dr., Kaanapali; 808-667-4540; maui.hyatt.com

ANNOUNCEMENTS “I LOVE WAILUKU” VIDEO CONTEST - I love Wailuku.

You love Wailuku. We all love Wailuku! (Not to get all Sarah McLaughlin or anything, but this kind of love is better than ice cream...) Show how much heart you have for this gem of a town in a 2-3 minute video — and post it on Wailuku First Friday’s Facebook page — to vie for a chance to win glory and goodies. (Hint: Next week’s WFF is a great time to shoot your masterpiece, but it’s never too early to start conceptualizing.)

GREEN BUILDING AND LEED EXAM PREP TRAINING PROGRAM - The application deadline for the LEED Exam Prep training program has been extended from February 1 to February 15. Sponsored by SLIM and VITEC, learn about green technologies and strategies appropriate for Hawaii’s unique climate zones. $699. University of Hawaii Maui, 310 Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului; 808-984-3379; sustainablemaui.org GOOD DEED = CLEAN GARAGE - Got usable paint, clothes or household items? In the spirit of laulima, get it out of the garage/garbage and into hands who can can make good use of it, by taking it to the Community Work Day Program. 8 a.m.-4:30 p.m. Community Work Day Program Headquarters, 420A Old Puunene Ave., Puunene; 808-877-2524; cdwhawaii.org

FOODIE

SIR ELTON JOHN WITH BAND - Fri, Feb 25. Some guy named Sir Elton John (implied by “Sir,” he’s a knight — probably of the “Surnameless Club”) has a little gig at the MACC. Make that two little gigs as the MACC. A second show has been added on February 24, due to popular demand. Not sure why. Never heard of him. $77 / $97 / $152 / $252. 7 p.m. The Yokouchi Pavillion, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org

FREE SCREENING: “SIMPLY RAW - REVERSING DIABETES IN 30 DAYS” - Fri, Jan 28. Join Whole Foods Market for a free screening of the film, “Simply Raw – Reversing Diabetes in 30 Days.” This documentary follows six individuals battling diabetes. Learn about their inspiring stories and how they achieved better health naturally, in just 30 days. 6 p.m. Whole Foods Market, 70 Kaahumanu Ave #B, Kahului; 808-8723310; wholefoodsmarket.com/maui

DAMIAN MARLEY & NAS’S “DISTANT RELATIVES” TOUR - Sun, Feb 27. An all-ages show! Just think of how sad you’ll be if you miss this. So stop at nothing to get your tickets. Because “it’s a journey, some will get left behind / ‘cause in life you cannot press rewind.” A BAMP Project production. $39.50.

6:30 p.m. Events Lawn, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 808-242-7469

BUY LOCAL, EAT LOCAL: A HOW-TO DEMO - Fri, Jan 28. Whole Foods Market celebrates what’s salivating about seasonal, locally grown produce with a cooking demonstration. Free. 11 a.m. Whole Foods Market, 70 Kaahumanu Ave #B, Kahului; 808-8723310; wholefoodsmarket.com/maui HEALTHY FAMILY FRIDAYS - Fri, Jan 28. Kick off the weekend right by focusing on healthy, nutritious

TheGRID

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY

01/27

01/28

01/29

01/30

01/31 - 02/02

FIND THE GRID ONLINE AT MAUITIME.COM/GRID OR TO HAVE YOUR BUSINESS ADDED TO OUR WEEKLY GRID SEND YOUR INFORMATION TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

ALE HOUSE

Thirsty Thursdays w/ DJ Jamn J, 9pm

Bottoms Up w/ DJ C & DJ LX, 9pm

Dat Guyz 9:30pm; No Cover

Simma Down Sunday w/ DJ Jamn J, 10pm

TUE - O.G. Mac, 9pm / WED - Wild Wednesday w/ Bad Kitty, 8pm

AMBROSIA

Old School Thursdays w/ DJ Del Sol

Freakin’ Fun Fridays w/ DJ Mats

Sunrize Saturdaze w/ DJ Decka

Sunday Night Fever w/ DJ CIA

MON – Ron & Rob of The Crunch Pups / TUE – Future Sound w / DJ AstroRaph / WED – Maui’s HI-5 Night (S.I.N.) w/ DJs Del Sol & CIA

Live Music

Live Music Roundback Revolution Roadshow

WED - Wild Wahine Wednesdays goes “Back to the Future” w/ DJ Blast & Chilltown, 10pm; $10

355 E. Kamehameha, Kahului - 877-9001

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891-1011

CARY & EDDIE’S HIDEAWAY REST. 500 N. Puunene Ave., Kahului - 873-6555

CASANOVA

Maui SLAM Poetry’s Beatnik Beat Night, 9:30pm; $10

CHARLEY’S

Wavetrain 9pm; $5

Bucky Walters Band, Blue Grass Humbolt, 9pm; $5

Game Show Fanatics $10; 8pm

Sunday Funday

WED - Group Therapy (turntable style) w/DJ Boomshot & Guests

Jr. & Oren 7:30 - 10pm; No Cover

Dave Caroll 7:30 - 10pm; No Cover

Dave Caroll 7:30 - 10pm; No Cover

Erin Smith 7:30 - 10pm; No Cover

MON - Peter DeAquino / TUE - Live Jazz / WED Ryan Palma (All sets 7:30 - 10pm; No Cover)

DIAMONDS ICE BAR

House Music 10pm; No Cover

Cody, Amanda & Patrick 10pm; No Cover

Roots Judgment 10pm; No Cover

Jordan & Wolf 10pm; No Cover

MON - Gomega, 10pm / TUE - Suppah Duppah Reggae Band, 10pm / WED - House Music, 10pm

DOG & DUCK IRISH PUB

Quiz Night 8pm; No Cover

Jordan & Wolf 10pm; No Cover

Jarod 10pm; No Cover

Kanoe 10pm; No Cover

MON – Jordan / TUE – Live Music / WED – Jessica & Kanoa (all sets 10pm; No Cover)

Karaoke

Kanaka Jams 7-11pm; No Cover

Karaoke

Karaoke

WED - Free Pool & Karaoke

Rampage 9pm - Close

Dat Guyz 9pm - Close

HiRiZ 9pm-1:30am

Industry Night Karaoke

MON - Karaoke / TUE - Karaoke Contest / WED - Open Mic Night

Live in Lahaina Open Mic 9pm; No Cover

Live Music 7:30pm-10pm; No Cover

DJ Music 10pm

MON - Kulwea / TUE - Ryan Palma WED - Erin Smith (all sets 7:30-10pm; No Cover)

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

WED - Karaoke

Ashley Welte 7pm - Close; No Cover

Guest Performer 7pm - Close; No Cover

Farzad & Mike Madden 7pm - Close; No Cover

1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-0220

142 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-8085

COOL CAT CAFE

Wharf Cinema, Lahaina - 667-0908

1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-9299

1913 S. Kihei Rd. - 875-9669

GREEN LEAF SPORTS BAR 1088 Lower Main St., Wailuku - 244-4888

HAUI’S LIFE’S A BEACH 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891-8010

HARD ROCK CAFE

900 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7400

ISANA

515 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-8199

JAVA JAZZ

3350 L. Honoapiilani Rd. 667-0787

foods the whole family will enjoy. Free. 5 p.m. Whole Foods Market, 70 Kaahumanu Ave #B, Kahului; 808872-3310; wholefoodsmarket.com/maui

See Big Shows for more. $10 ($5 before 9:30pm).

9:30 p.m. Casanova, 1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao; 808-572-0220; casanovamaui.com

FREE TASTINGS AT WHOLE FOODS MARKET - Sun, Jan 30. Each week, the store’s Healthy Sundays program visits a different department to highlight nutrient-dense ingredients and healthy recipes. Free.

3 p.m. Whole Foods Market, 70 Kaahumanu Ave #B, Kahului; 808-872-3310; wholefoodsmarket.com/maui

FRIDAY, JAN 28

“MEALS ON A BUDGET” RECIPE SHOWCASE WITH SHARLA - Wed, Feb 2. Looking for the great recipes on a budget? Join demo diva Sharla for a delicious recipe that will satisfied the entire family without breaking the bank (less than $3 per serving). Free. 5 p.m. Whole Foods Market, 70 Kaahumanu Ave #B, Kahului; 808872-3310; wholefoodsmarket.com/maui

EVENTS THURSDAY, JAN 27 LAMBERT LEE FAMILY CONCERT ‘A FAMILY AFFAIR’ - Come celebrate the musical reunion of Louise Lambert, Joi and Curt Lee. They’ll share the music of their lives in a rare and wild evening of song from Andrews Sisters and Motown, to inspiring Swinging jazzy, blues and eclectic originals. $15 (or two for $25). 7 p.m. Unity Church of Maui, 483 South High St., Wailuku; 808-205-3971; louiselambert.com OPENING NIGHT: “GET A JOB” AT IAO THEATER - Opening night for first theatrical run of “Get A Job.” Showtimes: 5pm* (+ Q&A with actresses Kathy Collins and Lana Queddeng), 7:15pm (+ KAOI 91.5 FM show), and 9:15pm (+ Q103 FM show). Be sure to fuel-up first at Wailuku Coffee Co. (extends hours 7am-7pm, through Friday). The Maui movie fun continues through January 30. See This Week’s Picks for more. $5* / $10. Iao Theater, 68 N. Market St., Wailuku; Tickets on sale online or at Maui Thing: 808-249-0215; getajobthemovie.com BEANICKS AND BROWNCHICKEN BROWNCOW STRING BAND - Augmenting this installment of Maui SLAM Poetry is Justin Morris and Matt Del Olmo of BrownChicken BrownCow String Band (with the whole band later that night), plus cellist Ashana Sofia, Douglas Deboer’s visual alchemy, and live painting by Melissa Rigney. Winning poet gets a Benjamin bill (props and costumes encouraged).

YOUR SECOND CHANCE TO SEE “GET A JOB” - The second of for four-day screening of “Get A Job.” Showtimes: 5pm (+ Q&A), 7:15pm (MauiTime show!), and 9:15pm. Make sure to save your collectors-item tickets — there’s a unique one for each showing.

Plus, the beer garden teams with Cafe O’Lei for snazzy eats and sippables just across the street (grinds/ gulps continue on Saturday, too). Enjoy the movie magic through January 30. See This Week’s Picks for more. $5* / $10. Iao Theater, 68 N. Market St., Wailuku; Tickets on sale online or at Maui Thing: 808-2490215; getajobthemovie.com HENRY KAPONO - A special performance with the Wild Hawaiian himself.

No Cover. 5-7 p.m. Dukes Beach House, 130 Kai Malina Pkwy., Lahaina; 808-6622900; dukesmaui.com DANCE JAM - Celebrate the end of the month with a freeform dance party. No instructions. No inhibitions.

Just great music to come shake your booty to. $13.

Studio Maui, Haiku Marketplace, 810 Haiku Rd., Suite 265, Haiku; 808-575-9390; thestudiomaui.com

Brian Cuomo 7pm - Close; No Cover

move our bodies around Maui County. P.S. Please park at Makawao Union Church, and not on the roadside. 12-6 p.m. Rainbow Park, Baldwin Ave., Makawao; 808-264-7691; mauidanceadvocates.com KEEPING IT CLEAN AND GREEN IN HANA - Continued from January 25, this is the final day of this great community recycling event by the Community Work Day Program. They’re accepting appliances, scrap metal, tires ($5 fee ea.), TVs, computers, electronics, microwaves, propane tanks, household and vehicle batteries. (Please no vehicles, furniture or greenwaste.). Free. 8 a.m.-5 p.m. Parkinglot across old Hasegawa General Store, Makai-side of Hana Hwy. (towards Hamoa), Hana; CDW: 808-877-2524 HALEAKALA WALDORF SCHOOL OPEN HOUSE - Explore the campus, meet the educators and experience what makes their curriculum unique.

Please RSVP. Tour begins promptly. 10 a.m. Haleakala Waldorf School, 4160 Lower Kula Rd., Kula; 808-8782511; waldorfmaui.org

SOME HERE. ALL ONLINE.

NAPILI COMMUNITY GARDEN CLEAN-UP - The Napili Community Garden announces the first cleanup for everyone interested in creating an organic community garden on the West side. Help prepare the soil for planting by removing debris and plastic from the site. Garden plots will be available starting in July, on a first-come, firstserved basis. Please bring water, hats, sunscreen, and covered shoes. Free. 9 a.m.-12 p.m. Napili Community Gardens, Intersection of Hwy. 30 and Napilihau St., Lahaina; 808-665-5483

CALENDAR LISTINGS

ON MAUITIME.COM

SPALICIOUS NIGHT AT THE GRAND SPA - Maui’s most elegant and well-known spa hosts a pampering night especially for ladies. Access to their hydrotherapy circuit, chocolate spa mini-treatments, and sinful desserts combine for a night to spotlight your inner diva. See This Week’s Picks for more. $60, 6-12 $30. 8 p.m. Grand Wailea Resort & Spa, 3850 Wailea Alanui Dr., Wailea; 808-875-1234; grandwailea.com

SATURDAY, JAN 29 MAUI DANCE ADVOCATES DANCE-A-THON - Join the cause to help get “dancing” defined in Maui’s Footloose-esque laws! The Maui Dance Advocates are looking to raise money and awareness about the silly restrictions we currently face to moderately

YOUR CHANCE TO SEE “GET A JOB” - This weekend of “Get A Job” screenings hits its peak. Showtimes: 3pm*, 5pm (+ Q&A with director Brian Kohne and producer Stephan Schaefer), 7:15pm, and 9:15pm.

Make sure to go early (and stay late) at the beer garden for Cafe O’Lei grinds and special wines. The fun continues through tomorrow, January 30. See This Week’s Picks for more. $5* / $10. Iao Theater, 68 N. Market St., Wailuku; Tickets on sale online or at Maui

MON - Ashley Welte / TUE - Ras Shaggai / WED - Rene Alonzo (All 7pm - Close; No Cover) Thing: 808-249-0215; getajobthemovie.com 10TH ANNUAL MAUI COATAL LAND TRUST “BUY BACK THE BEACH LU’AU” - See Big Shows for more. $150. 5:30pm. Old Lahaina Luau, 1251 Front St., Lahaina; 808-244-5263; mauicoastallandtrust.org

SUNDAY, JAN 30 YOUR (LAST!) CHANCE TO SEE “GET A JOB” - You know you like fo’ go see dis movie one las’ time. But you bettah hurry up, eh?! The first-ever theatrical run of “Get A Job” comes to a close today. Showtimes: 3pm*, 5pm (+ Q&A), and 7:15 pm. See This Week’s Picks for more. $5* / $10. Iao Theater, 68 N. Market St., Wailuku; Tickets on sale online or at Maui Thing: 808-249-0215; getajobthemovie.com ROUNDBACK REVOLUTION ROAD SHOW - Attention six string samurai: Bounty Music and the Ovation Guitar Company have a treat for you! Enjoy deals, demos and more, plus enter to win a Ovation Celebrity CC24TBBY guitar. Oh, and did we mention complimentary pizza from 3-4pm? Yeah. So much cool, it’s hard to handle. 2-5 p.m. Casanova, 1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao; 808-572-0220; casanovamaui.com

WEDNESDAY, FEB 02 PROPOSED WIND ENERGY DEVELOPMENT PUBLIC HEARING - The Hawaii Interisland Renewable Energy Program (HIREP) Wind Programmatic Environmental Impact Statement (HIREP Wind EIS) will be covered at this public hearing hosted by the state Department of Energy and Department of Business, Economic Development and Tourism. Requests to testify should be sent to hirep@dbedt.hawaii.gov.

Free. 5:30-9 p.m. Pomaika’i Elementary School, 410 Hina Ave., Kahului; 808-586-2536; hirep-wind.com/

DINNER MUSIC WEST MAUI CANOES - Sun, Live Jazz 3-6 pm; Fri & Sat, Ras Shaggai 5:30-8:30pm. 1450 Front St., Lahaina, 808-661-0937.

COOL CAT CAFE - Every Thu, Jr. & Oren; Every Fri & Sat, Dave Carroll; Every Sun, Erin Smith; Every Mon, Peter D’Aquino; Every Tue, Live Jazz; Every Wed, Ryan Palma (all sets 7:30-10pm). Wharf Cinema Center, Front St., Lahaina, 808-667-0908.

DUKE’S BEACH HOUSE - Thu, Ernie 3–5pm, Garrett & Peter 6–8:30pm; Fri, Garrett 3-5pm, Kulewa

JANUARY 27, 2011 31

SEE THE MAUI

SHOW

MONDAYS DOORS 7:30 PM ADMISSION: FREE ALL AGES

DAMON PARRILLO W/ DANYEL ALANA HardRock Rock Café Café wants Hard wantsto tosend senda a Special Thanks Thanks to Special toour ourMaui Maui Merchants, Neighbors Merchants, Neighborsand and Communityfor forhelping helping to raise Community raise

$5,400 $12,145.92 for the

Pacific Cancer Foundation

RYAN PALMA TUESDAYS DOORS 7:30 PM

ADMISSION: FREE ALL AGES

PARTNER SPONSORS: for the PACIFIC RADIO GROUP, BYRON BROWN &

the DERELICTS, LICKER NO COMMISSION, - IMAGINE THERE’S HUNGER ORDER of the WHITE ROSE, GORILLA JAZZ, CAMPAIGN KUMULANI CHAPEL, GO! AIRLINES, IRATION & KAOI RADIO GROUP, RITZ Donation Sponsors CAMERA, KA‘ANAPALIKAPALUA BEACHADVENTURES HOTEL, A HUI HOU TATTOO LA HAIRA BEAUTY SALON ATLANTIS SUBMARINE MAUI TIME WEEKLY, 007 PRODUCTIONS KIMO RESTAURANT BLACK ANGUS STEAK HOUSE AND BUDWEISER KOBE STEAKHOUSE HARLEY DAVIDSON

BUBBA GUMPS CAFÉ O LEI KIHEI LAHAINA TATTOO CHEESEBURGER IN PARADISE IRONWOOD RANCH CAT CAFÉ THECOOL DUNES AT MAUI KONA BREWING ‘ULALENA FLATBREAD KAPALUA ADVENTURES MAUIFROGS TIMES BOSS GANNONS AIR MAUI HELICOPTERS GAZABO RESTAURANT PACIFIC WHALE GRAND FOUNDATION WAILEA RESORT & SPA MAUI JIM SUNGLASSES HULA GRILL THE FEAST AT LELE BUDWEISER SALON EXECUTIVES MID PACIFIC TATTOO WEST MAUI PET LIK ARTPARASAIL GALLERY RUTH’S CHRIS STEAKHOUSE TAXING TIME TAX AND BUBBA GUMPS BOOKKEEPING SERVICES THE KAPALUA VILLAS KAANAPALI GOLF COURSE HULA GRILL ULTIMATE WHALE WATCHING THE PLANTATION HOUSEART RAINBOW GLASS & IMAGES RESTAURANT GALLERY

ERIN SMITH

LAHAINA COOLERS

LAHAINA FISH COMPANY Donation Sponsors: DR. BRENDAN KRAUSE

LEILANI’S COOL CAT CAFE LONGHI’S VALLEY ISLE MASSAGE MAMA’S FISH HOUSE GECKO GROUP PUBLICATIONS MAUI BREW KIMO’S MAUI JIMSHOTEL/ SUNGLASSES MAUI PRINCE MAKENA RESORT GOLF BRYCE COURSE MAUI STYLE KOBE JAPANESE STEAK MAUI ZEN DAY SPAHOUSE MAMA'S FISH HOUSE MERRIMANS BLACK ANGUS STEAK HOUSE NAPALI SEA HOUSE BOB CAR CARE OLD LAHAINA LUAU LEILANI’S OUTBACK STEAK HOUSE MERRIMAN’S ROY’S KAHANA BAR AND GRILL SPOTLIGHTTRIOLGY GOLD PUBLISHING OUTBACK STEAKHOUSE ULALENA THEATER OLD LAHAINA WESTIN RESORTLUAU & SPA MAUI ZEN DAY SPA LEAH MARK PHOTOGRAPHY ATTOMIC MAHALO TATTOO TOURS ENVISONS ENTERTAINMENT ARTIST “DAVO”

WEDNESDAYSDOORS 7:30 PM

ADMISSION: FREE ALL AGES

THURSDAY HOSTED BY

DAMION EMERSON

FEATURING MAUI ARTIST

THURSDAYS DOORS 9:00 PM

OPEN MIC NIGHT

ADMISSION: FREE ALL AGES

Plus Prize Giveaways of $175

'30/5 453&&5 t t )"3%30$, $0.

32 JANUARY 27, 2011

TheGRID

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY

01/27

01/28

01/29

01/30

01/31 - 02/02

FIND THE GRID ONLINE AT MAUITIME.COM/GRID OR TO HAVE YOUR BUSINESS ADDED TO OUR WEEKLY GRID SEND YOUR INFORMATION TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

KAHALE’S

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei 875-7711

KIMO’S

845 Front St., Lahaina - 661-4811

Vince Esquire

Kenny Roberts

1810

Kahala

MON, TUE & WED - Da-Ha-Y-Ns

Ben & Glenn

Sam Ahia

MON & TUE - Sam Ahia

Karaoke w/ Manino 7:30-11pm; No Cover

MON - Service Industry Night WED - Karaoke w/ Manino, 7:30 - 11 pm

Billy & The Bad Dogs 8-11pm

Dan Saunders Rock Band 8-11pm

KOBE STEAKHOUSE

Karaoke & Dancing w/ Aunty Toddy Lilikoi

Karaoke & Dancing w/ Aunty Toddy Lilikoi

LONGHI’S LAHAINA

Crazy Fingers 9pm - 1am; No Cover

KIWI ROADHOUSE

95 E. Lipoa St., Ste A101, Kihei - 874-1250

Bad Kitty 8-11pm

Eight Track Players

136 Dickenson St., Lahaina - 667-5555

888 Front St., Lahaina - 667-2288

LULU’S KIHEI

1945 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-9944

LULU’S LAHAINA

Lahaina Cannery Mall - 661-0808

Salsa w/ Nat, 8-11pm DJ Nexus, 11pm -Close

Louise Lambert, 8-11pm DJ Canespider, 11pm-Close

Easy Listening w/ Neto 8-10pm DJ AstroRaph, 10pm-Close

Classic Rock Thursdays w/ Howard Ahia

HiRiZ 9pm-Close

X-clusive Saturday Nights w/ DJ Money Mike

MON - Service Industry Night w/ All Access DJ & Junior / TUE - Karaoke w/ Troy / WED - Ladies Night w/ DJ Twizzy

MAUI BREWING CO.

WED - Open Mic Night, 10pm; No Cover

Kahana Gateway Center - 669-3474

MERRIMAN’S

Ranga Pae

MOANA CAFE

Phil & Angie Benoit

1 Bay Club Pl., Kapalua - 669-6400

71 Baldwin Ave., Paia - 579-9999

MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE 100 Kaukahi St. Kihei - 874-1131

DJ Paul 9:45-11:45pm

OCEANS BAR & GRILL 1819 S. Kihei Rd. - 891-2414

6-8:30pm; Sat, Mondo 3-5pm, Kulewa 6-8:30pm; Sun, Mondo 3-5pm, Erine & Miles 6-8:30pm; Every Mon, Tue & Wed, Brian 3-5pm, Damien & Edee 6-8:30pm.

130 Kai Malina Pkwy., Lahaina, 808-662-2900.

HULA GRILL - Thu, Bruddah Larry 11:30am-1pm, Ernest Pua’a 2-4pm, Armadillo 4:15-6:15pm, Kulewa 6:30-9pm; Fri, Ernest Pua’a 11:30am-1pm, Kawika Lum Ho 2-4pm, 1810 4:15-6:15pm, Kawika, Roy, & Tarvin 6:30-9pm; Sat, Jack Stone 11:30am1pm, Kawika Lum Ho 2-4pm, 1810 4:15-6:15pm, Wili Pa 6:30-9pm; Sun, Ron Hetteen 11:30-1pm, Kawika Lum Ho 2-4pm, 1810 4:15-6:15pm, Derrick Sebastian Trio 6:30-9pm; Mon, Ernest Pua’a 11:30am-1pm, Kawika Lum Ho 2-4pm, Armadillo 4:15-6:15pm, Derrick Sebastian & Josh Kahula 6:30-9pm; Tue, Kawika Lum Ho 11:30am-1pm, Jarrett Roback 2-4pm, Ernest Pua’a 4:15-6:15pm, Ernest Pua’a & Friends 6:30-9pm.; Wed, Mika Villaren 11:30am-1pm, Ernest Pua’a 2-4pm, Peter DeAquino 4:15-6:15pm, Ernest, Roy, & Tarvin 6:309pm. Whaler’s Village, 2435 Ka’anapali Pkwy., Bldg P, Lahaina, 808-667-6636.

LAHAINA PIZZA COMPANY - Every Wed, Thu & Fri, John Kane 7:30-9:30pm; Sat, Harry Troupe 7:30-9:30pm; Sun, Greg Di Piazza 7:30-9:30pm; Every Mon & Tue, Martin Tevaga 7:30-9:30pm.730 Front St., Lahaina, 808-661-0700.

LEILANI’S ON THE BEACH - Fri, The J.D on the Rocks Band 2:30-5pm; Sat, J.D. & Harry 2:30-5pm; Sun, Kilohana 2:30-5pm. Whaler’s Village, 2435 Ka’anapali Pkwy. Bldg. J, Ka’anapali, 808-661-4495.

LULU’S LAHAINA SURF CLUB & GRILL - Every Thu, Classic Rock Thursdays featuring Howard Ahia 6-8pm; Fri, Cyrus Clark 5-7pm; Every Mon, Junior 8-9:30pm; Every Tue, Karaoke w/ Troy 8pm. Lahaina Cannery Mall, 1221 Honoapiilani Hwy. #A1, Lahaina, 808-661-0808.

MERRIMAN’S - Wed-Sun, Ranga Pae; Mon, Benoit Jazzworks; Tue, David Choy. All sets 6-9pm. 1 Bay Club Pl., Lahaina, 808-669-6400.

PIONEER INN GRILL & BAR - Wed, Greg DiPiazza 6-8pm; Tue, Ah Tim 5:30-8:30pm 658 Wharf St., Lahaina, 808-661-8881.

SEA HOUSE RESTAURANT - Every Tue & Fri, Kincaid Kupahu 7-9pm; Every Sun & Thu, Andrew Kaina 7-9pm; Sat, Coehlo Morrison 7-9pm; Every Mon & Wed, Albert Kaina 7-9pm 5900 Lower Honoapiilani Hwy., Napili, 808-669-1500.

TIA JUANA’S - Thu, Randall Rospond & Rand

Ranga Pae

Jazz on the Blue, 7-10pm / Jordan & Wolf, 10pm-Close

DJ Stylz 10pm-Close

Rootikal Riddum, 10pm

SOUTH MAUI AMBROSIA - Every Thu, Jamie Gallo 7pm; Every Tue, “Glee” Screening 7pm. Every Wed, Red Carpet Movie Night (this week: “Reservoir Dogs”) 7:30pm. 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 808-891-1011 BEACH BUMS BAR & GRILL - Every Fri, Tom Cherry & Mike F. 5-9pm; Every Tue, Randall Rospond 5-8pm 300 Maalaea Rd. #1M, Maalaea, 808-243-2286.

Celtic Tigers, 6-9:30pm / Big John of Off Tomorrow, 10pm

gers 6-9:30pm; Mon, Joyce & Gord 6:30-8:30pm; Tue, Murray Thorne 6:30-8:30pm; Wed, Avi & Indio 5:45-7pm, Willie K 7-9pm. 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea, 808-874-1131.

PITA PARADISE WAILEA - Sun, Benoit Jazzworks 5:30-7:30pm. 34 Wailea Gateway Plaza, Wailea, 808-879-7177.

TUE - Latin Dance Party ALE HOUSE - Fri, Hawaiian music with Braddah Francis 4-8pm & Tue 4-7pm. 355 Kamehameha, Kahului, 808-877-9001.

CAFE O’LEI AT THE DUNES AT MAUI LANI - Every Thu, Reiko Fukina 5:30-8pm; Every Fri & Sat, Phil and Angela Benoit 5:30-8pm.1333 Maui Lani Pkwy., Kahului, 808-877-0073.

CARY & EDDIE’S HIDEAWAY RESTAURANT Every night, Francois on piano; Every Fri & Sat, “Early Late Night” live music until 11pm; Every Sun, Fausto on acoustic guitar during brunch.

500 N. Puunene Ave., Kahului, 808-873-6555.

STELLA BLUES CAFE - Every Thu, Ah Tim 4-6pm; Every Fri, Ahumanu 4-6pm; Fri & Sat, The Dave Nelson Band w/ Peter Rowan 8:30pm; Sun, Slam featuring David Choy 7-10pm; Mon, Tom Cherry & Mike Finkiewicz 4-6pm ; Every Tue, Tom Conway 4-6pm; Every Wed, Randall Rospond 4-8pm, Slam featuring David Choy 7-10pm; 1279 South Kihei Rd., # 201, Kihei, 808-874-3779.

CAFE DES AMIS - Every Thu, Joe Conte plays The Chapman Stick; Every Sat, Live Argentinian Music; Every Wed, The Stone Violets 6:30-8:30pm. 42 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 808-579-6323.

LISTINGS ONLINE

CALENDAR LISTINGS MAUITIME.COM/LISTING

TAQUERIA CRUZ - Every Tue & Sat, Live Music Reggae, Jazz, Blues 5:308:30pm 2395 S. Kihei Rd. #112, Kihei, 808-875-2910.

KIWI ROADHOUSE - Thu, Dominick 5-7pm; Fri, Mango Pickers 5-7pm; Wed, Ron & Rob 5-7pm. 95 E. Lipoa St., Ste. A101, Kihei, 808-874-1250.

THREE’S BAR & GRILL Thu, Live Jazz; Fri, Jeff; Sat, Steff Lomeli; Mon, Cyrus Clark; Tue, Sammy Rouisse. (All sets 7pm) 1945-G S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 808-879-3133.

LULU’S KIHEI - Fri, Salsa Lessons 7-8pm & Salsa Music w/ Neto & Barbara 8-11pm; Fri, Hula Show 5-7pm; Fri, Dezman 8-11pm; Sat, Hula Show 6-8pm; Sat, Easy Listening w/ Neto 8-11pm; Sun, Karaoke w/ Manino 7:30-11pm; Mon & Tue, Easy Listenting w/ Terry 5-7pm; Wed, Karaoke w/ Toby 7:30-11pm. 1945 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 808-879-9944.

THE RED BAR AT GANNON’S, A PACIFIC VIEW RESTAURANT - Thu, Fulton Tashombe & Special Guests 6-8pm; Tue, Braddah Larry Golis 6-8pm Wailea Golf Club House, 100 Wailea Golf Club Dr., Wailea, 808-875-8080.

MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE - Thu, Murray Thorrne 6:30-8:30pm; Fri, Gail Swanson 6:30-8:30pm; Sat, Jazz on the Blue 7-10pm; Sun, The Celtic Ti-

MON - Firey Latin Music / TUE - Willie K ; Tin Can Comedy / WED -Willie K; Jordan & Wolf,

SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE - Every Thu, Erin Smith; Every Fri, Randall Rospond; Every Sat, Tom Conway; Every Sun, Viva La Rumba; Every Mon, Kanoa; Every Tue, Sebrina Barron; Every Wed, Wolf. (All Sets 4-6pm) Kihei Kalama Village, 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 808-874-6444.

SUBMIT YOUR

MONSOON INDIA - Every Sat, Romantic Violin & Guitar Duets by Cambria Moss & Ricardo Dioso 6:30-8:30pm; Every Tue, Hula Honeys 5:308:30pm 760 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 808-875-4555.

TUE - David Choy / WED - Ranga Pae TUE - Open Mic Night

Ka’ena Elaban 9pm - 12am

TROPICA - Every Fri, Soul Lounge 8 -10pm; Every Sat, Island Essence featuring DJ Zinn 8-10pm.

Westin Maui Resort & Spa, 2365 Ka’anapali Pkwy., Ka’anapali, 808-662-2762.

HAUI’S LIFE’S A BEACH Every Thu, Junior Lacuesta; Every Fri & Tue, Rick Glencross; Every Sat, Ryan Robinson & Wolf; Every Wed, Jordan Cudworth. (All Sets 4-8pm.) Sun, Mon & Tue, Karaoke 8pm; Wed, Open Mic 9pm. 1913 S. Kihei Rd., #E, Kihei, 808-874-1250.

Ranga Pae

DJ Music

Coon of the Haiku Hillbillys. 2291 Kaanapali Pkwy., Lahaina, 808-667-4080.

CAPISCHE? - Every Fri & Sat, Mark Johnstone 7-10pm 555 Kaukahi St., Kihei, 808-879-2224.

Ranga Pae

TRADEWINDS POOLSIDE CAFE - Every Thu, Island Favorites w/ Kawika Lum Ho; Every Fri, Girls Nite Out w/ Gina Martinelli; Every Sat, Classic Rock w/ Domi Mon, Bobby Ingram & Franklin Russell; Every Tue, Mike and Mark; Every Wed, Steve Sargenti. All no cover. 2259 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 808-891-8860.

CENTRAL MAUI

UPCOUNTRY MAUI

GREEN BANANA CAFE - Every Tue, Thu & Sat, Polynesian Dance Coffee Luau 6pm.137 Hana Hwy., Paia, 808-579-9130.

LOCAL MOCHA CAFE - Every Fri & Sat, Live music 5-9pm. 81 Makawao Ave., Pukalani, 808-573-2859.

MAX WORLD BISTRO - Thu, Rodney K.; Fri, Benny Uyetake; Sat, Gerit Williams; Sun, Danyel Alana Trio & Damon Parillo; Tue, Rakhal Kincaid; Wed, Brooks Maguire (all sets 6:30-9:30pm). 810 Kokomo Rd., Haiku, 808-575-2629.

MOANA BAKERY & CAFE - Every Thu, Phil & Angela Benoit 6:30-8:30pm; Every Tue, Open-Mic 6pm. 71 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 808-579-9999.

RESORT SHOWS WEST MAUI Hyatt Regency Maui Resort & Spa- 200 Nohea Kai Dr., 808-661-1234.

UMALU - Live Music 7-9pm.; Daily, Torch Lighting Ceremony 5:30-6pm.; Daily (except Wed), Live Music 4-6pm.

Kaanapali Beach Club - 104 Kaanapali Shores, 808-661-2000.

OHANA BAR & GRILL - Every Wed & Thu, Live Music 5:30-9:30pm; Every Sun, Thu & Sat, Torch Lighting Ceremony 5:30-9:30pm.

Kaanapali Beach Hotel - 2525 Kaanapali Pkwy., 808-661-0011.

KANAEHELE ROOM - Daily (except Sun & Mon),

JANUARY 27, 2011 33

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PRIZES & SURPRISES!

.com

There are over 100 things you could be doing today on Maui.

Go to mauitime.com for complete weekly calendar listings, and find something to do today.

34 JANUARY 27, 2011

TheGRID

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY

01/27

01/28

01/29

01/30

01/31 - 02/02

FIND THE GRID ONLINE AT MAUITIME.COM/GRID OR TO HAVE YOUR BUSINESS ADDED TO OUR WEEKLY GRID SEND YOUR INFORMATION TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

PINEAPPLE GRILLE

Jawaiian Music w/ DJ Bruddah Damien

SANSEI - KAPALUA

Free Karaoke 10pm - 1am; No Cover

Free Karaoke 10pm - 1am; No Cover

Free Karaoke 10pm - 1am; No Cover

SANSEI - KIHEI

Free Karaoke 10pm - 1am; No Cover

Free Karaoke 10pm - 1am; No Cover

Free Karaoke 10pm - 1am; No Cover

SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE

DJ Slackin 10pm - Close; No Cover

DJ Sonny 10pm - Close; No Cover

DJ LX 10pm - Close; No Cover

Roots Judgment 9pm-12am; No Cover

Vince Esquire 9pm-12am; No Cover

Ah-Tim

The Dave Nelson Band w/ Peter Rowan 8:30pm-Close; $25/$30

The Dave Nelson Band w/ Peter Rowan 8:30pm-Close; $25/$30

STOPWATCH SPORTS BAR

Karaoke w/ Pearl Rose 9pm-12:30am; No Cover

Maui Underground 9pm-1am; $3

Karaoke w/ Pearl Rose 9pm-12am; No Cover

TIA JUANA’S

Randall Rospond & Rand Coon, 10pm-12am Arise

The Vince Esquire Band

An Den

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

MON through WED- Karaoke

Industry Night 9pm-2am; No Cover

Undone w/ Q Ross 9pm-2am; $10

Spun Out w/ DJ Calcul8 9pm-2am; $10

Closed

MON - WED - Closed

Soul Lounge 8-10pm

Island Essence w/ DJ Zinn 8-10pm

DJ Blast, 8pm-2am; $10 16+ Night Club

Next Level, & DJ Kutmaster Spaz 9pm-2am; $10 ($5 with UHMC Student ID)

Ohana Groove 10pm

Ladies Night w/ Next Level Entertainment, 10pm

Free Karaoke

MON - Free Karaoke / TUE - Thirsty Tuesday & Free Karaoke / WED - Free Karaoke

200 Kapalua Drv. Lahaina - 669-9600

115 Bay Dr., Lahaina - 669-6286

1881 S. Kihei Rd., Ste. KT116 -879-0004

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-6444

Smooth Jazz Sounds w/ Brian Cuomo & Friends, 7pm -10m

SPORTS PAGE GRILL & BAR 2411 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-0602

STELLA BLUE’S

1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-3779

1127 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-1380

2291 Ka’anapali Pkwy., Ka’anapali - 662-2762

THREE’S BAR & GRILL 1945 S Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-3133

TIFFANY’S

1424 L. Main St., Wailuku - 249-0052

TIMBA

505 Front St, Ste. 212, Lahaina - 661-9873

TROPICA

2365 Ka’anapali Pkwy., Ka’anapali - 662-2762

THE UNDERGROUND 744 Front St., Lahaina

WATERCRESS

Waiehu Beach Center, Wailuku-243-9350

333 Dairy Rd. #101, Kahului - 871-1414

“Kupanaha: Maui Magic for All Ages” 4:30-7:30pm.

TIKI BAR & GRILL - Daily, Hula Show 6:30-7pm; Every Tue & Wed, Leo Kane 6-9pm; Every Sun & Mon, Kealaoka’ (Jason Fundang) 6-9pm; Daily, Music by Lanui 6-9pm.

TIKI TERRACE RESTAURANT - Sun, Ka’anapali Champagne Brunch 9 a.m.-1pm.

Marriot Maui Ocean Club - 100 Nohea Kai Dr., 808-667-1200.

LONGBOARDS KA’ANAPALI - Daily, Solo guitarists and sunset hula dancers 5:30-8:30pm; Every Sun, Miles Ahead Duo 8-11 a.m.; Every Wed, Desmond Yap 5:30-9:30pm.

ALALOA LOUNGE - Every Fri & Sat, Live entertainment 8-12pm.

Royal Lahaina Resort 2780 Kekaa Dr., 808-6613611.

ROYAL OCEAN TERRACE - Every Thu, Fri & Sat, Live Hawaiian Music 6-8pm.

Sheraton Maui - 2605 Kaanapali Pkwy., 808-661-0031.

MON - DJ Blast / TUE - DJ LX / WED- The ADD Twins (All sets 10pm - Close; No Cover)

Slam feat. David Choy

MON - Tom Cherry & Mike Finkiewicz / TUE - Tom Conway / WED - Randall Rospond / Slam feat. David Choy WED - DJ Mania Dancing 9pm-12:30am; No Cover

Karaoke No Cover; 8pm

WOW-WEE MAUI’S

Ritz-Carlton Kapalua - One Ritz-Carlton Dr., 808-669-6200.

Ikaika Blackburn 10pm

Kanoa of Gomega 10pm - Close; No Cover

MON, TUE & WED - Dat Guyz; No Cover

Brian Haia 6-9pm.; Sat, Keali’i Lum 6-9pm.; Wed, Scott Baird Duo with James DeBose 6-9pm.

SOUTH MAUI Fairmont Kea Lani - 4100 Wailea Alanui, 808840-8402.

FAIRMONT KEA LANI - Daily, Live Music 5:30-9:30pm.

POLO BEACH GRILL & BAR - Daily, Live Music 4-5:30pm.

Four Seasons Resort - 3900 Wailea Alanui, 808874-8000.

LOBBY LOUNGE - Daily, Torch Lighting Ceremony 5:30-6:30pm.; Tue, Jazz Music 8-10:30pm.; Every Mon, Wed, Thu & Sat, Fri, Jazz Music 8-11:30pm.; Sun, Hawaiian Music 8:30-10:30pm.; Daily, Hula Dancers 5:30-6:30pm.

LOOKING FOR SOMETHING?

Grand Wailea Resort & Spa- 3850 Wailea Alanui Dr., 808-875-1234.

CALENDAR LISTINGS

BOTERO BAR & LOUNGE Every Wed, Live Hawaiian Music 5:30-9:30pm.

ON MAUITIME.COM

LAGOON BAR - Daily, Cliff Diving 6-8pm; Daily, Torch Lighting Ceremony 6-8pm; Daily, Live Music 6-9pm.

Sugar Cane Train - 975 Limahana Pl., 808-661-0088.

SUGAR CANE TRAIN - Thu, Sugar Cane Train Dinner 5pm.; Daily, Ride the Sugar Cane Train 10 a.m.-4pm.

Warren & Annabelle’s - 900 Front St., 808-667-6244.

WARREN & ANNABELLE’S - Daily (except Sun.), Warren & Annabelle’s Magic Show 5pm.

Westin Maui Resort & Spa - 2365 Kaanapali Pkwy., 808-667-2525.

ONO BAR & GRILL - Sun, Raz Shaggai 6-9pm.; Fri,

GRAND DINING ROOM Every Sun, Live Hawaiian Music and Hula Performances 10:30 a.m.-1pm.

MELE MELE LOUNGE - Daily, Live Music 9-11pm.

EAST MAUI Hotel Hana-Maui - 5031 Hana Hwy., 808-248-8211.

HOTEL HANA-MAUI - Every Fri, Hula dancing 7-8pm.

PANIOLO LOUNGE - Every Sun, Wed, Thu & Sat, Live music 6:30-9:30pm.; Every Fri, Live music

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JANUARY 27, 2011 35

KULA KID

BY ANU YAGI anu@mauitime.com + @anuheayagi on Twitter

And The Devil Makes Three â&#x20AC;&#x153;

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s All About the Music

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ARY R O P M CONTENTRY HITS COU

SIGNAL 24/7 STRONG NO BULL! A DIVISION OF

&217$&7 86 72 $'9(57,6( Â&#x2021; 36 JANUARY 27, 2011

D

onâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t furrow your brow like that,â&#x20AC;?

Nana always lovingly chides, 50 years my senior and somehow looking better for it. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The creases will stay put.â&#x20AC;? Sure enough, sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s rightâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and written with the wrinkles across my forehead is the word â&#x20AC;&#x153;skeptic.â&#x20AC;? Vanity notwithstanding, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a badge I wear proudly (hopefully offset by the heart I wear on my sleeve).

But reading this column will likely browbeat an undeserved wrinkle upon poor, pentecostal Nana.

Because in the spirit of this weekâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Mind, Body, Spirit issue, I got a tarot card readingâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and liked it.

Sure, tarot sounds harmlessâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;even commonplaceâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;to many. But there are those (Nana included) who who see it as part of the occult, an access point for The Devil.

Shaking myself of the guilt Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m sure a skeptic should not have, I climbed the stairs above Cafe Des Amis to Paiaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s new Psychedelic Emporium.

After all, I told myself, this is just a journalistic quest for column fodder (perhaps galvanized by all the spooning Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been doing back here with Caeriel Crestin). And if Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m going to run into Satanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s embrace, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be through my self-guided misadventures and sailorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tongue.

Truly the only thing Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m worried aboutâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;other than hurting my familyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s feelingsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;is how to remain polite if this tarot reader turns out to be a quack looking to ďŹ&#x201A;eece me.

Honestly, I was expecting disappointment. Tarot began purely as a European card game, and had no reputable link to divination prior to the 18th century. Plus, at least one etymological theory traces the word â&#x20AC;&#x153;tarotâ&#x20AC;? to Bologna, Italy. Seriously.

I was imagining sitting crosslegged on Persian rugs, choking on incense smog while a warty old woman divined destiny from a set of shabby cards. How wrong I was.

S

uzy Q is an enviably ďŹ t rock nâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; roll mom with a blonde pixie bob whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been reading tarot cards since she was a kid. She and one of her ďŹ ve sons teamed up to open the Paia shopâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;which mostly sells pipes and concert postersâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; last Monday. Far from a musty den, the store is bright and OCD clean, with a shoji screen sectioning off a big wooden table where we sat for the reading. Suzy is refreshingly

candid. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Some people just enjoy this as parlor trick, some people get real meaning out of it,â&#x20AC;? she says.

Readings are $20, $15 for kamaâ&#x20AC;&#x2DC;aina (having priced a few psychic-ish offerings in preparation for this column, I can tell you thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a steal).

Suzy daubs essential lemongrass oil on my wrists and asks me to breathe deeply and focus on my question.

Oh crap. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m supposed to have a question? Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m full of questions about tarot, but it didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t occur to me to come prepared with a question for tarot.

Suzy assures me the question can be about anythingâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and that itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s best kept private. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s her job to read the cards, she says, not me. So I close my eyes and thinkâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; really thinkâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and manage to rattle around multifarious ideas about everything Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not accomplishing but wish I was. OK. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not really a question. But at least itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s an idea of something Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been questioning.

Suzy asks me to cut the deck of 78 cards into however many piles I want, then she reassembles them. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I always tell people that life is so random,â&#x20AC;? she explains. â&#x20AC;&#x153;You think youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve got it all stacked up, and it goes back differently.â&#x20AC;?

She lays out just the top-ten cards in an orientation called the Celtic cross. Frankly, as she makes patient explanation, I canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t help but read meaning into each card and its placementâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;from the Three of Swords representing how people perceive me as having had great sorrow to my hopes and dreams convoluted by the opportunity-laden but indecisive Seven of Cups.

And so I ďŹ nd myself falling in love with tarot, in all its beautiful, archetypal, dare I say magical glory.

The cards didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t tell me anything I didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t already know, but it was fun to draw coincidence from chaos and bring to boil some things that had been on the back burner of my mind.

Speaking of which, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s my ďŹ nal outcome card: The Devil. When Suzy revealed the card, I giggled a little. She told me not to worry. See, with tarot, The Devil isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t coming to get youâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;it is you. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s every bad habit, every addiction, every turn in tumble dry when youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re already wrung out. Still: sorry, Nana. â&#x2013; To read more Kula Kid with links and photos and stuff, and to leave comments, visit mauifeed.com/kulakid To share or save: mt.hy.pr/1432k

BY CAERIEL CRESTIN

HOROSCOPE

sign.language.astrology@gmail.com +

Sign Language

QUIZunderstood ANSWERS ...to questions on page 7

AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18) The thing about “experts” is that once they achieve that status many of them rarely, if ever, question themselves. Thus their expertise can quickly fall out of date. Don’t fall into this trap, especially if your in-depth knowledge is about another person.

People change fast and without notice sometimes; what you thought you knew may no longer be accurate. Failing to notice such transformations (or note their import) not only makes you look bad, it makes them feel bad. Remember how you acquired this state of in-depth expertise: by being observant, present, open-minded, and attentive. Maintain those qualities and you can’t really go wrong.

PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20) “Love the one you’re with,” is generally good advice, but there are limits to how far you can take it. Obviously, holding out for the perfect guy or gal is simply not a good idea; whoever you end up with is going to have stuff you just put up with instead of adoring. A short list is acceptable. If that list is so long you couldn’t memorize it if you had a week, there might be something wrong. Trying to find someone who’s at least a little more compatible may simply be your best bet.

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19) Many gifts do seem to come with strings attached, but that’s not necessarily a reason to reject them out of hand. Assess where such generosity is coming from—or, more accurately, who it’s coming from. Is the person reasonably up-front and honest about their intentions? If they make the “strings” especially visible, that’s all the more reason to trust them, because then you can honestly gauge whether or not those obligations are something you can live with. The answer’s probably yes. It’s the too-good-to-be-true gifts from sneaky people that you really have to watch out for.

TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20) While it may be tempting to rip someone a new one when they’ve screwed up—something you’re easily capable of— practicing compassion and understanding is probably your best (if less satisfying) long-term plan. By all means, they should know, without a doubt, exactly what mistake they made and how to keep from making it again. However, if you can, you should share such information gently instead of skinning and roasting them alive. Being harsher than you have to be—no matter how justified it seems or satisfying it is—will surely come back to bite you in the ass. Don’t do it.

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20) Here’s the thing about lies: they fester. The longer they’re allowed to continue and maintain their illusions, the worse the fallout once they finally explode and the truth comes out.

That’s why even white lies must be punctured as quickly as possible if they persist for more than a very short time, lest they fester and grow malign. This is a good week for lancing such unsightly boils. Come clean. Most people (even if they flip out a little at first, which they might) will come around and understand why you fibbed in the first place—and appreciate that you decided to be honest.

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22) You Crabs are notorious penny pinchers. Whether this comes from anxiety about the future, actually impoverished conditions in the present, or straight-up stinginess doesn’t really matter to those it affects. It’s a drag. “It doesn’t affect anyone but me!” you may protest. Not true. It’s shitty for the server in the restaurant whom you gave a bare minimum 15% tip, to the penny, and for your embarrassed companions in such a scenario, or for anyone who has to stand by and be at all complicit to your miserliness, or worse, suffer from it directly. How do you unlearn such unpleasant and unnecessary habits? I’m not sure, but this week should present a clue (and an opportunity) or two.

LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22) If you walked around wearing a straitjacket, or had a stinky pooping monkey clinging to your back, it’d be obvious what was keeping you from fully living your life and realizing your

true potential, especially in your relationships with other people. Just because the thing holding you back is much less visible doesn’t mean it’s not just as effective. It also doesn’t stay invisible for long once people get close to you.

It needs to be eradicated. This is easier said than done, but it’s not going to get simpler by putting it off. This week, at least seriously look into a long-term solution.

1. A CGI tsunami 2. He surfed them at night 3. 2 millimeters, 0.074 millimeters

VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22) I scolded Cancers for their parsimoniousness this week, but I’ll applaud you Virgos for your frugality. There’s a distinct difference between the two states. Being stingy means just being reluctant to part with your money under any circumstances; being thrifty, as you are, is simply practicing wisdom and foresight in your expenditures. Sometimes, ironically, that means spending more—if by doing so you buy something that’s higher quality and will outlast multiple replacements of the cheaper version. Your thriftiness is probably your most useful quality this week, provided you practice the deepest version of it (which, as I mentioned, may mean you spend more than you’d planned).

LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22) Sometimes we have such a deep, irrational resistance to something that it feels virtually impossible to overcome.

Even though you know you’ll feel good once you bite the bullet and just do it, it’s still hard to get off your ass and make yourself go there. That’s when you need help. Call in the big guns this week—namely, someone who will simply not let you off the hook, no matter what, and will make your life hell, if necessary, until you do what you need to do. This job can’t be fulfilled by just anyone, of course. It requires someone with some backbone and perhaps even a wellmeaning sadistic streak. I think you already have someone in mind, don’t you? Call them.

SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21) I cynically think of the lottery as the idiot tax. However, I do very occasionally purchase a ticket. Regularly buying them does seem like a truly stupid waste of money. But shelling out a buck every month or three isn’t a big deal any way you slice it. I like to think of it as giving the universe a chance to make me wealthy. Periodically creating a small window of opportunity for even extremely unlikely events (no matter what these are; for some people “falling in love” might qualify) is a tremendously good practice. You never know what might climb through. Please do so this week.

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC.21) Delegate, delegate, delegate. While you’re perfectly capable of handling everything on your plate, there’s no especially good reason why you should tackle it alone, while there are multiple excellent ones to justify sharing out the workload. It might get done better, or faster, or both. It might make someone feel good about themselves.

It might give you time to take on other stuff that you’d really enjoy. It might help you bond with someone. Not convinced yet? Humor me and do it anyway. You’ll be convinced in a week or two, even if you aren’t now.

CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19) Do the work. This is not something you usually have a problem with; out of the entire zodiac, only Virgos can match you for consistent long-term work ethic. However, when you conceive of a resistance to something, man, does that run deep! You’re arguably the most stubborn sign out there, and when you don’t want to do something, even when you rationally know you have to, it’s impossible for anyone else to make you do it. Only you have the power to overcome that internal defiance. This week, that’s your challenge.

Obviously, sheer logic and determination haven’t been enough to surmount the wall you’ve erected, so it’s time to try new, more creative tactics… like bribery, perhaps?

JANUARY 27, 2011 37

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