14.45 Mama Drama, April 28, 2011, Volume 14, Issue 45, MauiTime

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APRIL 28, 2011 ✚ VOLUME 14 ✚ ISSUE 45 ✚ FREE

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PAT MASUMOTO’S ‘MY MAMA MONOLOGUES’ OGUES’ EXPLORES THE DEEP, COMPLEX TIES BETWEEN TWEEN

MOTHERS AND THEIR CHILDREN DREN S 7 S U F S 15 U B ! EH BRAH I BALLOT VOTE! MAU TEMENTS A T S BEST OF N G I SOVERE D I K A L U K p.

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QUOTE OF THE WEEK:“Hawaii is a hotbed of human trafficking, and now we have a lawsuit to prove it...” pg.4

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Contents VOLUME 14

✚

THIS WEEK’S QUESTION: Describe your mother in three words or less.

ISSUE 45

5 NEWS & VIEWS

Interns: Henry Arroyo, Britney Kidd, Anna Such

Coconut Wireless catches a TSA thief. Hotels break ground and nurses fight the power in By the Numbers. Chinese boys pee on eggs in News of the Weird. Quizunderstood asks about journalist laws and anti-voting royals. Eh Brah! takes a creepy bus ride. Open Letters gases out. Snap Shot is pumped down. Sen. Sam Slom gives birth to more nonsense in Spin Cycle.

Contributors: Caeriel Crestin, Jory John, Ben Lowenthal, Avery Monsen, Ted Rall, Chuck Shepherd, Sara Tekula, Ynez Tongson, Barry Wurst II

10 FEATURE STORY

Editor: Jacob Shafer (808) 283-1308 / jacob@mauitime.com @jacobshafer on Twitter Determined and true Associate Editor: Anu Yagi (808) 264-8039 / calendar@mauitime.com @anuheayagi on Twitter Always dancing Proofreader: Dina Wilson Vain

Photographer: Sean Michael Hower mauiweddingmedias.com / howerphotography.com Best, nurturing, angel Art Director: Chris Skiles chris@mauitime.com / lucky11studios.com Glue of family

As Mother’s Day approaches, My Mama Monologues gears up for another round of matriarchal musings. Anu Yagi gets a preview, and interviews the 103-year-old mama who inspired it all.

Graphic Designers: Shane Fontanilla, Christina Tarleton

13 FOOD & DRINK

Advertising Executive: Brad Chambers (808) 283-3260 / brad@mauitime.com Doesn’t like crybabies

Jen Russo indulges her sweet tooth and does pau hana at the Tiki Lounge.

General Manager: Jennifer Russo (808) 280-3286 / jen@mauitime.com @jenrusso on Twitter

15 BOM BALLOT

Administrative Executive: Judy Toba (808) 244-0777 / judy@mauitime.com You’re killing me Administrative Assistant: Jennifer Brown Web Design: Linear Publishing Publisher: Tommy Russo (808) 283-0512 / tommy@mauitime.com @tommyrusso on Twitter

Pull it out and fill it in—the Best of Maui ballot, that is.

19 FILM CRITIQUE Barry Wurst II wants to ask you to Disney’s Prom.

20 Film Capsules/Listings

21 THIS WEEK’S PICKS MauiTime is published every Thursday by MauiTime Productions, Inc. Its contents are Copyright © 2010 by MauiTime Productions, Inc. All rights reserved. Subscriptions are available at $70 per year. Reproduction or use without permission is strictly prohibited. MauiTime may be distributed only by MauiTime’s authorized independent contractor. MauiTime is valued at $.50 per copy and permits one complimentary copy per person. No person may, without written permission of MauiTime, take more than one copy of each weekly issue. All opinions expressed throughout MauiTime are those of the authors and not necessarily the same opinions as MauiTime Productions, Inc. and MauiTime. MauiTime 33 N. Market St., Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793 office (808) 244-0777 • fax (808) 244-0446 www.mauitime.com @mauitime on Twitter Deadlines: Display Advertising: Friday Noon Classified: Monday 4pm Calendar: Monday Noon Circulation: 18,000 copies of MauiTime

Taro and onions fests and a benefit for Japan in Paia.

22 Da Kine Calendar 23 Grid

28 BACK PAGES Kula Kid talks Hawaiian sovereignty. Sign Language tells Taurus to spread the love.

30 Classified 31 Mind, Body & Spirit

ON THE COVER: Photography by Sean Michael Hower Design by Chris Skiles

H A W A I I ’ S

P A R T Y

S T A T I O N

APRIL 28, 2011

3

By the

BY JACOB SHAFER

NEWS&VIEWS

jacob@mauitime.com + @jacobshafer on Twitter

NUMBERS Coconut Wireless 509-392

Labor Pains

one incriminating statement: “I just made a big mistake.” It’s not the first time a TSA employee has been nailed for theft. Earlier this year screeners at Newark Liberty Airport in New Jersey and JFK in New York confessed to stealing tens of thousands of dollars from passengers—again, mostly unsuspecting international travelers. And these are the people we’re trusting with our nude full-body scans?

Screen No Evil

Winning!

The Transportation Security Administration (TSA) didn’t need any more bad press, but it’s getting some anyway. This week, former Big Island TSA screener Dawn Nikole Keka admitted in court to swiping $200 from an undercover agent and now faces up to a year in jail and a $100,000 fine. According to a Department of Homeland Security affidavit, Keka was targeted because of “numerous allegations” that she was “stealing cash from Japanese travelers passing through her lane” at Kona Airport.

Tooting our own horn alert: last week, at the annual AAF Pele Awards on Oahu, MauiTime’s 2010 Best of Maui issue— which, you’ll recall, was printed in eyepopping 3D—received the Special Judge's Award for outstanding design. Congrats to our whole ‘ohana—from editorial to production to sales to the team of intrepid volunteers who inserted cardboard glasses into

4,006 484

The TSA screener immediately lawyered up, but did offer one incriminating statement: “I just made a big mistake.”

Number of airline passengers who arrived in Hawaii from Japan on March 10, the day of the tsunami

Number of airline passengers who arrived in Hawaii from Japan on March 11

$16.5 million

Estimated cost of a new 138-room Marriott hotel set to be built near the Kahului Airport by Alexander & Baldwin

men’s passports and threatened them with deportation if they complained. The farms named in the suit include: Captain Cook Coffee Company, Del Monte Fresh Produce, Kauai Coffee Company, Kelena Farms, Mac Nut Farms of Hawaii and Maui Pineapple Company. It’s worth asking what took EEOC so long.

Years that elapsed between the County granting A&B zoning approval for the hotel and the groundbreaking, which took place this week Sources: Hawaii Government Employees Association, Honolulu Star-Advertiser, Hawaii Department of Transportation, Alexander & Baldwin

APRIL 28, 2011

On March 11 (the day after the Japan tsunami) the agent approached Keka’s screening area with $1,300 stuffed inside a Hello Kitty backpack and came out with $200 missing. Keka was asked to empty her pockets, revealing two crumpled $100 bills with serial numbers that matched the bills in the backpack. She immediately lawyered up, according to the affidavit, but did offer

The Blog Roll

9 4

We first wrote about this issue in September of last year, when the feds were pursuing criminal charges against Global Horizons. Then there’s the matter of money—can all of these farms afford to pay large monetary damages or will they simply fold? Finally, and perhaps most importantly, does this case—big as it is—even scratch the surface of the problem? We’re betting none of those questions have comforting answers.

Hawaii is a hotbed of human trafficking, and now we have a lawsuit to prove it. Last week, the federal Equal Opportunity Employment Commission (EEOC) brought legal action against a Mainland labor recruiter and six Hawaii farms for allegedly abusing imported Thai workers. It’s a story we’ve reported on before, but clearly it’s not going away. It begins with California-based Global Horizons, which asks foreign workers to pony up a “recruitment fee” in exchange for jobs. The workers then have to repay the money before they can pocket any earnings. The result, often, is a kind of indentured servitude. The Thai men named in the suit were sent to Hawaii by Global Horizons where, according to EEOC, they were paid substandard wages and “forced into vermin-ridden housing, denied the opportunity to leave the premises and subjected to harassment, including physical assaults, by their overseers.” Further, EEOC alleges, Global Horizons took away the

Vote by which Hawaii’s publichospital nurses rejected a new contract that would have cut their pay by 5 percent; all other members of the Hawaii Government Employees Association voted to ratify the contract

MAUIFEED.COM

Whether tripping off the tongue of a born-andbred local or befuddling the ears of a freshoff-the-plane tourist, pidgin's an essential part of Hawaii’s multicultural soundtrack. And it’s the subject of an...

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18,000 newspapers—for making it happen. Now all we have to do is top ourselves. ■ To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1445c

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Peanut butter and jelly. Peas and carrots. Sushi and sake. Some things blend so well, they really should just be one thing. Kaanapali’s Japengo understands this, and is kicking off...

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BY CHUCK SHEPHERD

NEWS&VIEWS

chuck@mauitime.com +

EH BRAH!

NEWS OF THE WEIRD INTERIORITY COMPLEX Businesses typically resist government regulation, but in March Florida’s interior designers begged the state House of Representatives to continue controlling them, with a theatrically ham-handed lobbying campaign challenging a deregulation bill. Designers righteously insisted that only “licensed professionals” (with a minimum six years of college and experience) could prevent the nausea Floridians would suffer from inappropriate color schemes (affecting the “autonomic nervous system” and salivary glands). Also, poorly designed prison interiors could be turned into weapons by inmates. Furthermore, deregulation would contribute to “88,000 deaths” a year from flammable materials that would suddenly inundate the market in the absence of licensing. Said one designer, addressing House committee members, “You [here in this chamber] don’t even have correct seating.” (If deregulation is successful, competition will increase, and lower fees are expected.)

EGG TO DIFFER The longstanding springtime culinary tradition of urine-soaked eggs endures, in Dongyang, China, according to a March CNN dispatch. Prepubescent boys contribute their urine (apparently without inhibition) by filling containers at schools, and the eggs are boiled according to recipe and sold for

the equivalent of about 23 cents each. Many residents consider the tradition gross, but for devotees, it represents, as one said, “the smell of spring.”

HOLY POLERS Former stripper Crystal Deans, who said she learned the trade at age 18 but later retired and turned to God for help through a rough patch of her life, now offers free pole-dancing classes in Spring, Texas, near Houston, expressly for Christian women. Her gyrations may be the same as when she was working, she said, but now everyone is clothed, and she dances only to “Christian music.”

BUTT WERE THEY THINKING? Marie Stopes International is a prominent London charity that robustly promotes a woman’s right to choose abortion, but a whimsical public service campaign in January has created unusually savage criticism. The organization partnered with the British comedy music band The Midnight Beast to produce a video suggesting anal sex as a contraceptive of choice. Among the lyrics to one song, “One up the bum, and it’s no harm done/One up the bum, and you won’t be a mum.” ■

Eh shifty guy on the bus: the first time your hand brushed against my leg, I assumed it was an accident. The second time, I scooted over but didn’t say anything. The third time— done blatantly as I was getting off—I asked you to stop and you flew off the handle, following me onto the street and calling me a “liar” and “bitch” and some other words I won’t repeat. Lucky for you I wasn’t carrying the can of pepper spray my boyfriend gave me; I assumed on Maui I wouldn’t have to worry about creeps invading my space. It’s in my purse now. Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations, 200 words or less (which we reserve the right to edit), changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent, to “Eh Brah!” c/o MauiTime, 33 N. Market St, Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793 or send an e-mail to

ehbrah@mauitime.com

To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1445n

QUIZunderstood 1. The state legislature is deciding whether to extend a law—set to expire in June—that protects Hawaii journalists from what?

2. Hawaii, Alaska, Maine and Vermont are currently the only states that ban what?

3. An adult parrotfish excretes (i.e. poops) up to a ton of what every year?

4. In 1872, what Hawaiian royal wrote: “Let me direct you, my people! Do nothing contrary to the law or against the peace of the Kingdom. Do not go and vote.” See answers, page 29

PHOTO BY RICHARD LING

APRIL 28, 2011

7

SNAP SHOT

NEWS&VIEWS

READER FEEDBACK APRIL 21, 2011 ✚ VOLUME 14 ✚ ISSUE 44 ✚ FREE

.com

Thanks for sharing the story of Jason King and his solar setup [“A Place the In The Sun,” The Green ISSUE Issue, April 21]. READERS RESPOND! TOMMY RUSSO As an enthusiastic A newbie to n alternative energy sources it was inspiring to read about what’s possible—and the fact that these technologies do pay for themselves if done correctly. I also agree with Mr. King that the government is not doing enough to encourage these kinds of innovations. Seems like the power will have to come from the people, as usual. — TL, Wailuku (via post) NEWS TRANSGENDER BENDER 4 EH BRAH! PUSSY PEDDLER 7 BEST OF MAUI BALLOT VOTE! 15 p.

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I’m wondering if Mr. King didn’t quite get the irony of his statement that the Chevy Volt is so technologically advanced it has to be shipped to the Mainland if it breaks down. And what about the irony of relying on hightech solar panels, inverters and batteries that embody a high energy and environmental cost during the manufacturing process? Not to mention the reliance on an expert who uses imported parts to fix the things. What we need is sustainable and resilient technology that we can make and fix ourselves using nothing more than simple tools and parts.

I’d rather use a gasoline generator and old carbureted car engine converted to run on either biogas, woodgas or ethanol to power my household and transport myself. Those I can understand and fix myself. I believe that to truly be sustainable and resilient we have to define our technology broadly to include how and where it is made, what it’s made of, how it’s fixed and how long it will last. Otherwise we are just deluding ourselves. — Peter Nebres, Kahului (via mauitime.com) While the article on the end of the Hawaiian Grammy [“Award Losing,” April 14] was informative, I think it was a shame you felt the need to pit local musicians against each other in order to tell the story. Hawaiian musicians compete heavily for gigs and recognition, but they also give each other tremendous support and aloha. The Grammys are a marketing tool, nothing more and nothing less. As artists, we know that for every Grammy winner there are many others who are more talented. This makes the reception of such an accolade a small kine joke, except for the power of promoting yourself as a Grammy winner. All that aside, we don’t need a Hawaiian Grammy; we don’t need validation from the world; we need each other. — Cyrus Clarke, Kihei (via e-mail)

Send yo ur FEEDBACK to the editor via e-mail (editor@mauitime.com), or post (Editor’s Inbox,

Fueling the Pinch From revolutions in North Africa to nuclear meltdowns in Japan, the sources of our power have become a hotter, more volatile issue than ever. And the cost is hitting home—in Wailuku and statewide—where $5 (or more) per-gallon gas may well be the new norm.

SPINcycle

MauiTime, 33 N. Market St., Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793), or check us out on Twitter (twitter.com/mauitime) and Facebook (facebook.com/mauitime). We reserve the right to edit feedback. Views expressed do not necessarily reflect those of MauiTime.

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Uncomfortably Slom In case you were wondering, Sam Slom of Oahu, the last remaining Republican in the state Senate, isn’t a birther “per se.” That’s what Slom told conservative talk show host Aaron Klein of WABC radio this week, in a 13-minute interview about—what else?—President Obama’s birth certificate. Slom conceded that Obama was “probably” born in Hawaii but suggested “the real issue is not the birth certificate, but what’s on the birth certificate.” Like? “It could have to do with what his name is on the birth certificate, who is actually listed as his father, the citizenship of the father.” Could be. Or maybe he’s embarrassed about the way his tiny ink footprint came out. Or maybe he’s allergic to birth certificates, and if he’s in the same room as one he breaks out in hives. Unfounded accusations are fun! Before ominously promising to “keep up the hunt,” Slom did offer one unfortunately accurate piece of analysis: “[This issue] isn’t gonna die.” - JS

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CIRCLE OF LIFE

WORDS BY ANU YAGI

PHOTOS BY SEAN MICHAEL HOWER

PAT MASUMOTO’S ‘MY MAMA MONOLOGUES’ OGUES’’ EXPLORES THE DEEP, COMPLEX TIES BETWEEN ETWEEN N

MOTHERS AND THEIR CHILDREN DREN N

W

hen the world is warm and wonderful, just as spring’s belly crests into summer, we celebrate matriarchs. In modern times—specifically since 1912 in the U.S.—every second Sunday in May is Mother’s Day (don’t forget). But who is “mother” and why do we honor her? The meaning is multifarious— biological or hanai, “mother” is a complex concept. Mother is nature and nurture. Mother can be both your most stalwart supporter and harshest admonisher. The same arms she holds akimbo when you’re in trouble are the arms that hold you tight when trouble finds you. From womb to bosom and beyond, mother is shelter. She can be benevolence or violence—or both. The proverbial mother lion, tiger, bear. Oh my. “Mother” is so much. For the last three years on Maui, a theater production called My Mama Monologues has explored what motherhood means by sharing

10 APRIL 28, 2011

moms’ most meaningful stories, as told through the narratives of their children. Solicited from novice and professional writers worldwide, the show boasts 81 cumulative monologues and counting—24 of which will be performed this year. The show’s creator, visual artist and playwright Pat Masumoto, calls this collection of stories “milky, spicy, hot, cold, ticklish and bittersweet.” She says these are words that speak to mothers’ capacity to be wholesome yet provocative, to love and to hate, and to embrace both comedy and drama. And like moms themselves, “the stories can be erotic, beautiful, sad or ugly,” says Masumoto. Whatever the tone, each story is written—and performed—with heartfelt emotion, by and for keiki and kupuna alike. Hundreds of monologues are submitted but only a handful are selected, and all undergo a collaborative editing process led by Masumoto, who says she keeps diversity and the show’s overall flow in mind. Masumoto says the one overarching stipulation is that

the story must be true. After all—as my own mother is fond of saying—the truth is beautiful. Masumoto says that over the years, she learned the value of collecting and sharing “stories about mama” by exchanging “gripes with girlfriends about our mothers’ eccentricities.” And since starting the show in 2009, Masumoto says she’s found that “even if the story isn’t selected for My Mama Monologues, the act of writing it is very transformational and therapeutic for the author.” Since its inception, the show has grown. Last year it was independently produced not only on Maui, but also in Lihue, Kauai, Colorado and Canada. Wherever it’s staged, the metamorphic blooms of the authors’ experiences easily translate from actor to audience. Because, for better or worse, every life begins with a mother. And for Masumoto, “mother of My Mama Monologues,” the life of the show began with her mother—the famed Florence Hasegawa.

We’re sitting in the airy house where Masumoto’s soon-to-be 103-year-old mother (widely and affectionately known as Grandma Florence) still—by her own insistence—lives alone. Outside, it’s a looming white house with tall concrete steps flanked by banisters announcing a large lanai. Inside, the architecture is warm with a decidedly Asian aesthetic; neatly decorated with rows of framed photos and awards, a Japanese doll or two and upholstery draped with delicately crocheted throws. “I was born in a room right back there,” Masumoto says, pointing. Her late father, judge George K. Hasegawa, built the house on a sunny corner lot. “They’re all the original families,” says Masumoto, indicating the houses across the street and caddycorner to the family home. “No one’s sold.” Masumoto inhales a wistful smile as she tells me of her “idyllic childhood” growing up in this home, and in a long-lost Lahaina. It was a different, post-plantation time (Grandma Florence grew up at Pump Camp) when neighborhood kids would “ride our bikes all the way to Ka’anapali—before there were any hotels [and] it was only kiawe… to us, it was such a far distance it might as well have been the moon.” The youngest daughter of Nisei (second generation Japanese), Masumoto remembers her parents as an “unusually expressive” and gregarious pair. Politically active, “my parents talked like Italians,” she laughs, sawing the air with her hands thus. Honorable Hasegawa was a favorite pick as master of ceremonies “anytime there was a wedding or birthday or funeral or whatever.” His shtick, says Masumoto, was to begin his poignantly humorous speeches with “Confucius say…” inserting something contextually clever to the close-knit community. So anticipated were her father’s “Confucius say” speeches that “he and my mother would prepare weeks in advance,” says Masumoto, reminiscing about her parents’ witty banter to find just the right quip. Hearing these stories, it’s easy to see how Masumoto—owner Market Street’s Gallerie Ha, a hub of contemporary art— is Grandma Florence’s daughter. This “living treasure” has long been known for her feisty forthrightness, tempered with sweet smiles—and Masumoto is much the same. The last time Grandma Florence graced MauiTime’s pages, contributor Ynez Tongson wrote about “a lifewizened general, barking orders to family and friends,” who tweets (yes, tweets!) under the handle @ grandmaflorence. (If you’re keeping track, since that October 2009 story, her Twitter followers have jumped from 811

“While some are indeed painful, these stories are celebratory,” says director Lisa Teichner. “It’s cathartic for everyone involved.”

THE MONOLOGUES... SHE’S PERFECT

to 1,874, as of this writing.) Naturally, not much has changed. This 70-pound, 4’ 10” tall woman may be petite, but her presence is not. Though “she can’t hear much” anymore, her words are shouted, big as bricks. And she reads voraciously. If it’s coming from Grandma Florence, it’s blunt. She has her opinions, but she’s also not afraid to answer, “I don’t know!” She tells me I’m “very pretty” (possible evidence that her eyes are worse than her ears), but that doesn’t mean I’m exempt from her two favorite curse words, “dang buggah” and “god funnit.” During the interview, Masumoto and I find we enjoy each others’ company quite a lot and end up talking for hours. Grandma Florence tires of this, and goes back to reading the newspaper. Though arthritis has curled her hands like the lunula, her penmanship is clear and narrow in the daily logbooks she’s kept “as long as I can remember,” says Masumoto. Citing the security of routine and a page-long list penned in 1998 of every daily vitamin and supplement, Masumoto says, “My mother lives this long for a lot of reasons.” Handing me a copy of the very first My Mama monologue titled “She Did Not Die,” Masumoto explains she wrote the piece—and began the show—as a gift for her mother’s 100th birthday in May 2009. The most dramatic part of the monologue is a description of when Grandma Florence, at age 96, was struck by a truck. “[Her] skin peeled back like an accordion. Her scalp needed to be stapled back on. Entire right ear barely attached.” (Ironically, that’s the ear she seems to hear best with.) This year, “She Did Not Die” is on hiatus, so I’ve been cleared for spoilers. The punch line to the story’s sad gore (because yes, it’s a comedy) builds off the premise of Grandma Florence’s consummate frugality (she’s a career bookkeeper who only recently retired as “the oldest marriage licensor in America” and who Masumoto writes is “a humanoid adding machine”). At a time when “it looked like death warmed over her,” Masumoto concludes: “Mom’s eyes suddenly opened wide. She stared at me for about five seconds—then came the words, barely audible, “Patty. Write this down.” …

What was she going to tell me? Had she left her body and gone to the other side, only to return with an important message? I pressed my ear against her mouth. She gave me Mr. Kawaguchi’s phone number! Then instructed loudly, ‘Please call him. Let him know that I won’t be coming to the Credit Union luncheon on Saturday… Ask him if I can have my five dollars back.’ I almost died laughing! Mom did not—she did not die.” In the years following the accident, Masumoto says her relationship with her mother changed. “At a certain point, mother becomes more like daughter, daughter more like mother,” says Masumoto. But there’s no abasement in this role reversal. “It’s really special that she’s lived this long. Now, there’s more give and take, and more understanding.” “We don’t debate like we used to,” Masumoto says. “About what? Oh, you know, politics and religion… We do talk about death. She’s very open about it.” On a nearby side table, there’s a Reader’s Digest coffee table book titled Life Beyond Death. Grandma Florence was raised Buddhist, but Honorable Hasegawa was a devout Christian (Masumoto’s own son is a pastor on Oahu). When they discuss plans for her funeral, Grandma Florence vacillates politely, not wanting to hurt anyone’s feelings. “She’s not thinking of herself—she’s thinking of everyone else!” laughs Masumoto. “Patty!” Grandma Florence shouts from the kitchen. “Patty, put your soup in the pot. Put the pot in the refrigerator.” Masumoto is off to attend to orders and I’m left to reflect on my own mother and mortality. I think about how, in the arc of the mother and child relationship, love is won and lost, and armistices are forged and broken. I think about how we might yearn for maternal approbation (or not); how mother might tolerate our insolence (or not); how this kind of love might be the most indelible of all. I think of how, when we’re freshly hatched, a mother’s love consumes us, but when we’re weaned fledglings, the bonds can strain. Everything seems clearer, we have nests of our own, and life goes on. Yet always, parent and child. And then, in some strange tender moment—should we be so lucky to live long enough to see it—round like the belly that began it all,

the relationship comes full circle. I leave hoping I’m lucky, like Pat and Grandma Florence.

SAVE THE DRAMA FOR YOUR MAMA Lily-stepping over a courtyard pond, the Iao breeze fills Gallerie Ha like breath into a balloon. It’s Easter morning and Masumoto and My Mama Monologue’s director Lisa Teichner are hard at work. They’re reviewing scripts and preparing for one-on-one consultations with some of the nearly two-dozen performers in this year’s show. As the cast members arrive and begin to work on their 30-second to sixminute pieces, the gallery is abuzz. “She has such vision,” Masumoto says of Teichner as we watch her coach blocking and suggest simple staging ideas. “See what she’s doing? She’s dramatizing each piece.” Teichner’s directorial work—and her knack for identifying and accentuating key moments—is a new addition to the series and, as the rehearsals show, a valuable one. Because, like the authors of the monologues, the people performing My Mama range from rookies to pros, young and old. And in the handful of instances when the author is performing their own work—like with Michelle Nakagawa’s “She Wears Shorts” or Meiko Hoffman’s “My Japanese Mom,” it’s helpful to have a critical eye shape a story that’s highly personal. “Their vulnerability is courageous,” says Masumoto. “I feed off it.” Teichner, who performed in last year’s show, nods in agreement. “While some are indeed painful,” she says, “these stories are, first of all, celebratory. It’s cathartic for everyone involved… It’s simply done, really [but] what’s great is that these are all true stories. Hopefully, it’ll inspire people to write or read a piece of their own and encourage people to talk to older generations and learn their stories.” It’s not Broadway, but maybe it’s better. It’s a raw and passionate patchwork of real lives and real love (and, sometimes, lack thereof). They’re their stories. Our stories. And, most importantly, Mom’s stories. ■

Playwright: Nina Morasky - Seattle, Washington Performer: Lily Katz (keiki)

SHE TWITTERS @GRANDMA FLORENCE – No. 2 HER PHONE CALL HER EATING RITUAL Playwright/Performer: Pat Masumoto – Pukalani, Maui

ELIZABETH POUNDS MORRISEY Playwright: George Morrisey - Merritt Island, Florida Performer: Russ Taft

MY MOTHER SAW HALLEY’S COMET Playwright: Kay Owen - Stockton, California Performer: Bobbie Best

MY MOTHER MARY Playwright/Performer: Mary McDonald Hadreas – Makawao, Maui

MOM THE GREAT Playwright: John M. Briley, Jr. – Wailuku, Maui Performer: Joel Agnew

MY MOTHER, OUR SECRET Playwright/Performer: Vicki Levin – Haiku, Maui

MY MOTHER’S HANDS Playwright: Dean Scott Waters – St. Augustine, Florida Performer: Ed Elkin

THICKET Playwright: Ittai Wong – University of Wisconsin, Madison by way of Kailua, HI

DEAR MOTHER Playwright/Performer: Mountain - Haiku, Maui

WHIPPINGS Playwright: Jo Ann Lordahl – Kalaheo, Kauai Performer: Joyce Romero

MAMA – IMPOSSIBLE Playwright: Brian Peoples – Lake Konstanz, Germany Performer: Will Makozak

SHE WEARS SHORTS Playwright/Performer: Michelle Nakagawa – Pukalani, Maui

GERTRUDE HUGHES, MY MOTHER Elizabeth Bolotin - Long Beach, California Reader: Eva Pennock

I WAS BORN CLOSETS ARE FOR CLOTHES Playwright/Performer: Deanna “D” Kubota – University of Hawaii, by way of Maui (plus performer Alexis Dascoulias)

MY MOM IS HILARIOUS II Playwright/ Performer: Noah Magbual (keiki) - Waihee, Maui

SOCKS ARE NOT A FASHION STATEMENT Playwright: Lynette Carodine – near Atlanta, GA Performer: Lilith Coryell Jenkins (keiki)

MY JAPANESE MOM

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Playwright/performer: Mieko Hoffman (with ‘ohana) - Kihei, Maui

MOM’S PLANTATION CAREER

My Mama Monologues

Playwright: Presentation “Pre” Apo – Kahului, Maui Performer: Paulina Galarita

Friday, May 6, 7:30pm doors / 8pm show, Iao Theater, 68 N. Market St., Wailuku

OUR MANIC MOMMA THE WAY HOME

A benefit for Japan Mothers Association. $18 general / $10 keiki & students / free for mothers 80-years-old or better, when accompanied by their children and/or grandchildren 242-6969; mauionstage.com / mymamamonologues.com

Playwright: Vernyce Dannells - Philadelphia, Pennsylvania Performer: Leah Tunkara

LAVENGRO Playwright: Lucy Lerner Wormser – Haiku, Maui Performer: Helen Kritzler

APRIL 28, 2011 11

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FOOD & DRINK

jen@mauitime.com + @jenrusso on Twitter

Sweet Spot

PHOTOS BY SEAN MICHAEL HOWER

Desserts aren’t the only thing on the menu at family-friendly Kapalua eatery The Village Cafe and Sweet Shoppe

We loved their version: dusted with a bit of cornmeal, crisp on 2000 Village Rd., Kapalua the outside and served in strips. Open daily, 7am-8pm; 665-1122 The jalapeno tarter is perfect dipping, but I also tried the for d artichoke dip, which arrives at ou probably artic table blazing hot with crusty don’t think of the ta crostini. The starters are a perfect Kapalua as a crost accompaniment to the extensive family restaurant nt accom destination. wine and cocktail list. Time to think For dinner, the boys— photographer Sean Hower and again. The Village Cafe and Sweet photo hubby Tommy—started Shoppe, which opened in December, iss my hu a delight for the whole ‘ohana. Located d with tthe soup du jour, a mahi minestrone, which earned raves. in the Kapalua Village Center at the mines ordered the brisket while top of Office Road, the area is a hub Sean o Tommy gambled on the special. of activity—check-ins for condos, the Tomm Thursday is Southern night: start of several hiking trails and, at the Thursd Stuart & Debbie Ka chicken, mashed potato and heart of it all, the cafe. fried ch tz creamed peas. While the brisket The first thing you see when you creame lovely, and the sauce on it was enter is the sweet shoppe counter/ was lov barista coffee bar. Fresh baked goods tempt empt My daughter was impressed so good we wanted some to bring home, the fried chicken got top billing by the crayons that were brought to keep you on pretty platters, Roselani ice cream am home with its crisp breading and tender juicy her busy; they’re triangle shaped and waits in twelve flavors and espresso drinks inside. None of us could stop grabbing at don’t roll off of the table, a nice detail. The made with Maui coffee offer the promise of his plate for samples. keiki menu is extensive, with eight items, a pick-me-up. I had the veggie lasagna, served with including pasta, pancakes, yogurt and fruit, There is plenty of seating to choose from, Ceasar salad. Baked in its own serving dish, quesadillas, mac and cheese and burgers. starting with a casual lounge with couches it comes with a thick crust of cheese and It looks like they got the memo: kids are and soft chairs within viewing distance lots of spinach. Seeing as I sampled so persnickety eaters. Even better, each item of flat-screen TVs. Past that is the dining much of everyone else’s food I took a lot comes with a choice of side ranging from room, featuring dark wood tables with of it home for leftovers and it made a great the usual like French fries or fruit to growncomfortable high-backed woven chairs and meal for later. If it can hold up overnight up salad and steamed high ceilings. If you prefer al fresco, head p items like green g the fridge and stand up through the double doors at the back of the in th room and drink in breathtaking views of for lunch the next day, I know it’s good. Northwest Maui. kno The place does have The Village Cafe serves breakfast, lunch T “sweet” in the title, so and dinner. Every night brings a different “sw themed dinner special for $22.75, like save room. The red velvet cupcakes—made on-site North Shore night on Saturday with coconut cupc battered shrimp, and tailgate night on like the other goodies—are one of their signature items; Friday with grilled skirt steaks and mac and cheese, all served with side dishes, soup or get one in your mouth and you’ll understand why. The salad and ice cream for dessert. you tiramisu is a work of art, tiram beautiful as it is tasty. beau Owners Stuart and O Debbie Katz are new to the Deb restaurant business, with a resta background in computers. back have lots of experience “I h coming from the other side com as a customer,” says Debbie. Amanda Larmer , Ron Labanan “It’s a different perspective & Hiromi Kawanishi being an owner.” Their bein comment card is important com veggies. vegg veggi ies. Picky as she is, to them—they say tthey truly want to shape their business into a place for residents and my kid k mowed through visitors alike. “Fill those cards out honestly,” her dinner with zest—not d Debbie encourages. “I really want to know because she loves broccoli, beca what’s good, and what we should still be but to t get to the Roselani working on.” and cookie. Some other highlights on the menu that My M daughter and I share I look forward to trying include the buildan affi a nity for calamari, so icken your-own burger, the breakfast quiche » we ordered it as a starter. Southern Fried Ch

Y

APRIL 28, 2011 13

FOOD & DRINK

BY JEN RUSSO jen@mauitime.com + @jenrusso on Twitter

OPEN LUNCH DINNER MEDITERRANEAN, ITALIAN, FRESH FISH

» with greens and POG vinaigrette and the cinnamon-swirl French toast. One of the perks of having such a dynamic space is the ability to host events. Swing by on May 5 at 5:30pm for a social media tweet-up mixer (no social media experience necessary), or the wine tasting reception on May 11 with winemaker Ray Signorello at 6pm. On Mother’s Day, seafood is the special with a

For more foodie news, visit MauiTime’s food blog: mauidish.com

shrimp frittata and caramelized sea scallops, along with a traditional turkey dinner. ■

TUNE IN

Got a hot food scoop? Contact Jen Russo at 280-3286 or fax to 244-0446.

To 97.3 K-Rock during the A Train with Johnny A at 5:20pm every Friday for Jen Russo’s tastings of the week.

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★ ONLY ONE (1) BALLOT PER PERSON ★ ALL BALLOTS MUST BE SIGNED ★ NO PHOTOCOPIED BALLOTS WILL BE ACCEPTED ★ MULTIPLE BALLOTS IN THE SAME HANDWRITING WILL NOT BE ACCEPTED ★ BALLOTS MUST BE MAILED IN; NO MORE THAN THREE (3) BALLOTS PER

As usual, categories are organized into five sections: arts & entertainment; food & drink; goods & services; politics & environment; and sports & leisure. We’ve added some new categories this year to spice things up, but you’ll still find all the old standbys. Please VOTE IN AT LEAST 40 CATEGORIES if you want your ballot to be counted. Voting ends May 19.

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s -AUI "REWING #O 3HIRT

CALL MAUI BREWING CO. AT 669-3474 FOR TICKETS Kahana Gateway Center 4405 Honoapiilani Hwy 808.669.3474 www.MauiBrewingCo.com

18 APRIL 28, 2011

BY BARRY WURST II

FILM

barry@mauitime.com

High School Non-Musical Disney makes another teen movie—and the result will surprise you Prom

★★★★★

Does this dress make me look like I’m in a Disney movie?

PG/104 min.

S

orry to break it to you, high schoolers, but prom won’t change your life—it’s just a dance. One of the refreshing aspects of Disney’s Prom is that it understands this simple truism. Only one character in the film is under the impression that the evening will be magical, and she’s the perky class president (played by Aimee Teegarden) who’s organizing the party. So of course she feels that way. Teegarden is cute as a button, but her story arc is the most predictable and least interesting part of the movie, which is more authentic, funny and perceptive than I expected. Prom wants to be a 21st century John Hughes film, and while it doesn’t quite get there, it has its own charms.

The outcome of the central love story is a given; it’s the subplots that make the movie. There’s a hilarious running

joke about a good-hearted but clueless senior whose inept attempts to find a date become progressively more cringe

worthy. A senior couple mourning the inevitable end of their relationship manage to (mostly) avoid the cliches inherent in that premise. We also meet two nerdy sophomores whose friendship is tested when a Dream Girl gets between them. These three story threads—the true heart of the film—reveal some painful truths about how cruel teens can be, on purpose or by accident. Of course, because this is Disney there are limitations to how far the honesty goes: there’s no profanity, only one brief act of violence and no one even mentions sex and drugs, let alone doing them. Sound like your high school experience? Still, it’s refreshing to see a movie about young people with no musical numbers, magic wands, vampire/ werewolf rivalries or mad slashers on the loose. Instead, we get a gentler, more idyllic but every bit as entertaining cousin to Pretty in Pink. I’ll take it. ■ To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1445f

APRIL 28, 2011 19

Showtimes

WHERE AND WHEN TO WATCH WHAT

GO TO MAUITIME.COM OR CALL THEATERS FOR SHOWTIMES FRONT STREET THEATER 900 Front Street, Lahaina, 249-2222

KA’AHUMANU 6 Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center, 1-800-326-3264

KUKUI MALL 1819 South Kihei Road, 1-800-326-3264

MAUI MALL MEGAPLEX Maui Mall, 249-2222

WHARF CINEMA CENTER 658 Front Street, 249-2222

New This Week HOODWINKED TOO: HOOD VS. EVIL PG - Animated - If you like that title, you might also like this fairy-tale skewering sequel. If not, probably not. 111 min.

The Conspirator

DYLAN DOG: DEAD OF NIGHT - PG13 - Comedy, horror - A supernatural private eye hunts baddies— including, hopefully, FEMA—in Louisiana. 107 min. THE CONSPIRATOR - PG13 - Drama - The death of Abe Lincoln may seem like it’s right up there with “what killed the dinosaurs?� in the pantheon of cold cases, but dammit, Hollywood’s gonna solve it. 122 min.

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20 APRIL 28, 2011

FAST FIVE - PG13 - Action - The sequel to Slow Four, or another one of those racing movies with Vin Diesel. You choose. 130 min. PROM - PG - Teen drama - See this week’s film critique (page 20). 104 min.

NOW SHOWING AFRICAN CATS - G - Documentary - Disney manages to make a movie about felines that involves no singing, dancing or lovable sidekicks. 89 min. ARTHUR - PG13 - Comedy - Russel Brand plays against type as an effeminate, crazy-haired douche. 110 min. HANNA - R - Action - A 16-year-old female assassin is unleashed on the European subcontinent. See girls?

Fast Five

You can do anything you set your mind to. 111 min. HOP - PG - Comedy - It wasn’t easy, but they figured out how to make the Easter Bunny even creepier: give him the voice of a foppish British comedian. 110 min. INSIDIOUS - PG13 - Horror - First the kid slips into a coma, then a bunch of evil spirits start showing up? Told you we should have gotten a dog instead. 97 min.

LIMITLESS - PG 13 - Drama - A writer takes a drug that gives him unlimited power. Sounds a lot like the MauiTime editorial department, minus the unlimited power bit. 120 min. THE LINCOLN LAWYER - R - Drama - A slimeball attorney (Matthew McConaughey) finds his conscience. Needless to say, not based on a true story. 119 min. RIO - PG - Animated, Family - A bird who sounds a lot like the dude from The Social Network has various feathered misadventures. 114 min. SCREAM 4 - R - Horror - See this week’s film critique (page 19). 120 min. SOUL SURFER - PG - Drama - Based on the inspirational life of Kauai surfer Bethany Hamilton, who lost her arm but not her drive. 106 min. SOURCE CODE - PG13 - Thriller - Jake Gyllenhall blows up every eight minutes, and you get to watch. 108 min. TYLER PERRY’S MADEA’S BIG HAPPY FAMILY - PG 13 - Horror - A dude dresses in drag and pretends to be a mean old lady to impart good ol’ fashioned Christian morals. Seriously. 121 min. YOUR HIGHNESS - R - Comedy - A pair of bumbling medieval idiots (including the dude who co-ruined the Oscars) go on a quest with a hot chick (Natalie Portman). 117 min. WATER FOR ELEPHANTS - PG 13 Romance - What, no peanuts? 122 min.

BY ANU YAGI

PICKS

anu@mauitime.com + @anuheayagi on Twitter

This Week's Picks

DIVERSIONS, DALLIANCES & DATES

H weather permitting). Continuing on Saturday (April 30), the main event boasts 22 food booths and 40 artisan and craft booths, and main stage entertainment like oli, hula and kanikapila jams by the likes UHMC students, Hula Halau Noe Noe O Kawaipapa and the Hawaiin Serenaders. Plus, a slew of interactive cultural demonstrations will be presented, like poi pounding, hala weaving, weapons and fishhook making and Hawaiian games (9am5pm). And like luau leaves around fresh fish, the event wraps up on Sunday (May 1) with a taro pancake breakfast (7:30-10:30am) and tours of the Kahanu Garden and Pi‘ilanihale

Heiau (11am) and Kapahu Living Farm (2pm). [Hana Ball Park; tarofestival.org] … If grinding cooked kalo (and you bettah cook ‘um good, bumbye you get itchy throat) have only exacerbated your cravings for local goods grown underground, plan to check out the 22nd Annual Maui Onion Festival on Saturday, May 7 (9:45am) where you’ll be overwhelmed (in a good way) with everything onion. And no excessive gumchewing is necessary, because the fest is a celebration of the “sweetest onions in the world, grown on about 150 acres in cool, fertile Kula.” (Fun fact: “Maui Kula Onion”

is trademarked to safeguard authenticity). [Whalers Village Fine Shops & Restaurants, Kaanapali; whalersvillage.com/onionfestival] …We may live on a rock, but none of us live under rocks—at least not enough to not know that our fellow man in Japan is still in need. Fortunately, good folks have come together to create good-time events for this good cause. This Friday (April 29, 1pm-1am, $20), Charley’s Restaurant & Saloon hosts a Jam 4 Japan “culture and roots event” benefiting the American Red Cross’s tsunami relief efforts. The phat lineup includes Riddum of Knowledge, Arise, Murray Thorne

ere’s an event you can dive into, like two eager fingers into a bowl of fresh poi: the 19th Annual Taro Festival begins Friday (April 29) with special tours around Hana Bay on the Makali‘i Voyaging Canoe (9am-4pm,

and Mana‘o Radio, among many others. It’s family friendly and admission gets you a cool commemorative T-shirt. [charleysmaui.com] And brah, if you’ve been boggin’ in deep country and your wheels stay all bus’, get ‘um rub-a-dub scrubbed at Saturday’s (April 30) Celebrity Carwash at Hoolea Terrace in Wailuku (10am-2pm). As the name implies, this benefit for Japan ain’t no ordinary car wash—it features a slew of local celebs—like Mick Fleetwood, Marty Dread, Henry Kapono and Kathy Collins—doing the all the dirty (or, rather, clean) work. [facebook.com/ hooleaterrace] ■

APRIL 28, 2011 21

BY ANU YAGI

CALENDAR

anu@mauitime.com + @anuheayagi on Twitter

Da Kine Calendar BIG SHOWS JAM FOR JAPAN - Fri, Apr 29. It’s a culture and roots event benefiting the American Red Cross’s tsunami relief efforts in Japan. Features food and family fun, plus entertainment by Riddum of Knowledge, Arise, Teomon, The Kryptones, Dan De Lion, Lia Live, Nector Collectors, Visibly Shaken, Murray Thorne, Mana’o Radio and special guests. (Whew, that’s quite the lineup!) See This Week’s Picks for more. $20 donation (includes T-shirt). 1pm-1am. Charley’s Restaurant & Saloon. 142 Hana Hwy., Paia; 579-9453; charleysmaui.com MINOR SETBACK & KNIFE OPERA - Sat, Apr 29. There’s a hard-hitting new trio in town, and they’re making their big debut this Saturday, alongside Minor Setback. Hide your kids, hide your wife... You know the rest! $5. 10pm. Casanova, 1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao, 572-0220 SUPPER CLUB: JOHN CRUZ AT STELLA BLUES - Fri, Apr 29. This famed Hawaiian song writer’s voice is as strong as the flame-licked grain of koa. Clearly, he inspire peeps to wax poetic. Check him out. $60 dinner & show / $30 show only. 6-9pm. Stella Blues Cafe, 1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei; 874-3779; stellablues.com TRANCE DANCE WITH DONNA DELORY - Fri, Apr 29. Ethereal pop music star Donna Delory returns to The Studio Maui for a night of ecstatic trance dance. Donna’s music blends north African grooves, meditative melodies, love themes, sanskrit mantras and psychedelic arrangements sure to “stir and shake” you into the sensual sublime. $20 advance / $25 door. 7-9:30pm. The Studio Maui, 810 Haiku Rd, Suite 265, Haiku; 575-9390; thestudiomaui.com

LIVE MUSIC ON THE NORTHSHORE!

RESTAURANT

THURSDAY APRIL 28

WAVETRAIN s PM Doors

FRIDAY APRIL 29

LIA LIVE AND THE KRYPTONES s PM

SATURDAY APRIL 30

JAM 4 JAPAN BENEFIT ALL DAY MUSIC 1PM - 1AM

SUNDAY MAY 1

“home of the $1 mai tai” Kihei’s BEST Sunset Cocktail Spot!

AUTHENTIC MEXICAN FOOD BURGERS SALADS Live Music Daily Sunset Happy Hour 3-7 Nightly Entertainment

RAMPAGE DAT GUYZ

KEOLA AND BAND PLAYING ALL THE ISLAND FAVORITES

SUNDAY FUNDAY!

SUPER DUB TRIBE

FAMILY NIGHT PIZZA SPECIAL! BUY ONE GET ONE 1/2 OFF. HOUSE SPECIAL.

ONE OF MAUI’S FAVORITE BANDS... NO COVER

TUESDAY MAY 3

KARAOKE INDUSTRY NIGHT

PELIGROSO TUESDAYS!

TACOS, MARGARITAS, $3 MEXICAN BEERS

WEDNESDAY MAY 4

THERAPY NIGHT!

THE FACE/FUZZ BOX: SPECIAL GUEST DJ’S s 0-

THURSDAY MAY 5

CINCO DE MAUI... PARTY! BEER AND MARGARITAS!

BOOKING INFO: DYINGSONS@GMAIL.COM

142 HANA HWY, PAIA

808-573-8085

www.charleysmaui.com

22 APRIL 28, 2011

THURSDAY 28 9pm

KIHEI’S LEGENDARY WEEKLY REGGAE DANCE PARTY

FRIDAY 29 9pm

SATURDAY 30 9pm SUNDAY 1 9pm MONDAY 2 9pm

KARAOKE

HAPPY HOUR PRICES ALL DAY!!

TUESDAY 3 SMOOTH ISLAND MUSIC 9pm

JUNIOR LACUESTA $1 TACOS $3 CORONAS $3 CUERVO SHOTS

OPEN MIC

WEDNESDAY 4 9pm

GET UP & JAM OR WATCH THE RISING STARS

1913 S Kihei Rd 808.891.8010 ACROSS FROM FOODLAND

DOORWAY INTO LIGHT - Sat, Apr 30. A Spring fundraiser with Ram Dass (6-6:30pm), Lotus Tribe (8-9:30pm), and DJ Ged (9:30-11pm). Plus, a screening of the film “Fierce Grace” (6:30-8pm), a silent auction, raffle, and tasty treats. $15. 6-11pm. The Studio Maui, 810 Haiku Rd, Suite 265, Haiku; 575-9390; thestudiomaui.com CELEBRITY CARWASH - Sat, April 30. Brah, you’ve been boggin’ in deep country and your wheels stay all bus’. What to do? Get ‘em suds up, of course! But Saturday’s event ain’t no ordinary benefit car wash. It features a slew of local celebs doing the dirty (or rather clean) work— celebs like Mick Fleetwood, Marty Dread, Henry Kapono and Kathy Collins. See This Week’s Picks for more. 10am-2pm. Hoolea Terrace, Wailuku; facebook.com/hooleaterrace THE BROTHERS CAZIMERO LEI DAY CELEBRATION - Sun, May 1. These masters of Hawaiian music keep with their tradition of performing on Lei Day. $12 / $28 / $37. 7:30pm. Castle Theater, MACC, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org HAWAII PUBLIC RADIO’S “ALOHA SHORTS” AT IAO THEATER - Sun, May 1. “Aloha Shorts” is a locally produced radio program of writings from Bamboo Ridge Press performed by Hawaii actors. Airs Tuesday’s at 6:30pm on HPR. This taping of “On the Road with Aloha Shorts: Maui No Ka Oi” features five authors with Maui roots read by seven Maui residents, plus music by Gail Swanson & George Kahumoku Jr. $15 general / $20 HPR members & students. 2:45pm. Iao Theater, 68 N. Market St., Wailuku; 244-6969

STAGE PROARTS PRESENTS “RATS! THE PIED PIPER MUSICAL” - Opens Fri, Apr 22, through Sun, May 8. A new fractured fairy tale based on “Old Badger’s

Book of Impractical Rats.” by B.S. Belliot. Oh, how hilarious! Sure to be a must-see. $10 keiki / $15 adult. ProArts Playhouse, 1280 S. Kihei Rd, Kihei; 463-6520; proartspacific.com MAPA PRESENTS “MARTINA: LOST AND FOUND” - Fri, Sat and Sun through May 1. An edgy drama about the challenges of growing up. Written by R.N. Sandburg. Directed by Sally Sefton Johnson. $12 adults / $8 keiki. 7:30pm. Steppingstone Playhouse, Queen Kaahumanu Center, 275 W. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului; 244-8760 x 228; mauiacademy.org CIRQUE POLYNESIA - Mon-Sat. It’s Cirque du Soleil-esque with a uniquely Polynesian twist. Enjoy amazing high-wire acts, aerial acrobatics, illusions, and mind-boggling contortionists. $62+ / deals for keiki and kamaaina. 6pm. Hyatt Regency Maui Resort & Spa, 200 Nohea Kai Dr., Kaanapali; 667-4540; maui.hyatt.com / cirquepolynesia.com

TICKETS ON SALE MAUITIME TWEET UP - Thu, May 5. Listen, I’d be crazy not to admit I’m crazy for Twitter. Why? MauiTime got me hooked on micro-blogging, of course! So what better way to catch up with tweeps IRL than at MauiTime’s Tweet Up? Cooler than getting more than 140 characters is that there’ll be hosted nonalcoholic drinks and pupus, plus cool giveaways. Free. 5:30pm. Village Cafe, 2000 Village Rd., Lahaina; 665-1122; mauivents.com MY MAMA MONOLOGUES - Fri, May 6. See this week’s cover story, “Mama Drama,” for more. $18 adult / $10 keiki / free for mothers 80-years or better (when accompanied by their children and grandchildren). 8pm. Iao Theater, 68 N. Market St., Wailuku; 244-6969; mymamamonologues.com SUPPER CLUB WITH BARRY FLANAGAN - Fri, May 6. Man, few can jam like Flanagan. Check him out. Stella Blues Cafe, 1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei; 8743779; stellablues.com TOAD THE WET SPROCKET - Sat, May 7. Having churned out pop/alternative hits like “Walk on the Ocean,” these musicians are Platinum-certified. Tickets available at groovetickets.com. Royal Lahaina Resort, 2780 Kekaa Dr., Lahaina; 661-3611 MOTHER’S DAY CONCERT BENEFITTING WOMEN HELPING WOMEN - Sun, May 8. Inspired to “repay the rewards in our lives with new good deeds done for new people,” Play it Forward Concerts presents Gail Swanson, Elaine Ryan and Sebrina Barron in a benefit concert for WHW. $60 dinner & show / $30 show only. 6pm dinner seating. 7:15pm show-only seating. Stella Blues Cafe, 1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei; 874-3779; stellablues.com PAULA FUGA - Sat, May 14. Sounds are as sweet as sugar when you’re with Paula Fuga. Not to be missed! Stella Blues Cafe, 1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei; 874-3779; stellablues.com WAITIKI 7 - Fri, May 13 & Sun, May 15. This hip band boasts “classic exotica for modern ears.” Stella Blues Cafe, 1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei; 874-3779; stellablues.com AWAKENING KINDNESS HAWAII CONCERT TOUR - Fri, May 13. Featuring Nawang Khechog, a Tibetan flautist who studied Buddhist philosophy and meditation with the Dalai Lama, plus pianist Peter Kater. $25 advance / $30 door. 7:30pm. Maui Arts & Cultural Center, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org / globalmediaproductions.com / nawangkhechog.com MAUI BREWERS FEST - Sat, May 14. Ooh-right! It’s that

TheGRID

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY

04/28

04/29

04/30

05/01

05/02 - 05/04

FIND THE GRID ONLINE AT MAUITIME.COM/GRID OR TO HAVE YOUR BUSINESS ADDED TO OUR WEEKLY GRID SEND YOUR INFORMATION TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

ALE HOUSE

Thirsty Thursdays Ladies’ Night, 6pm-Close / DJ Jamn J, 9pm; no cover

Bottoms Up Nightclub w/ DJ C, DJ LX & Emcee Jay-J, 10pm; $10

Rock & Roll Saturdays w/ DJ Diesel Dave, 10pm; no cover

Simma Down Nightclub w/ DJ JammnJ, 10pm; no cover

MON - Open Mic w/ hosts O.G. Mac Band, 9pm; no cover (sign up by 8pm)

AMBROSIA

Second Annual Pajama Jam w/ DJ Del Sol

Freakin’ Fun Fridays w/ DJ Mats

Sunrize Saturdaze w/ DJ Decka

Sunday Night Fever w/ DJ CIA

MON – The Mary Jane Xperiement / TUE – Drum & Bass Night w / DJ AstroRaph / WED – Maui’s HI-5 Night (S.I.N.) w/ DJs Del Sol & CIA

355 E. Kamehameha, Kahului - 877-9001

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891-1011

Louise Lambert 9pm; no cover

BISTRO CASANOVA

33 Lono Ave. #150, Kahului - 873-3650

CAPTAIN JACK’S ISLAND GRILL Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina - 661-7238

Mickey

CARY & EDDIE’S HIDEAWAY 500 N. Puunene Ave., Kahului - 873-6555

CASANOVA

Maui SLAMs for the Earth 9:30pm; $10

CHARLEY’S

Wavetrain 9pm; $5 Junior & Oren 7:30-10pm; no cover

1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-0220

142 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-8085

COOL CAT CAFE

Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina - 667-0908

Sounds of Addiction / Ray Gouliac

Bob Jones & Nils

Bryan Funai & The Band

Bryan Funai & The Band

Jazz with 2 Cats

Minor Setback & Knife Opera 10pm; $5

Mana’o Radio Upcountry Sundays, 2pm; $7

WED - Wild Wahine Wednesdays w/ DJ Blast & Chilltown, 10pm; $10

Lia Live & The Kryptones 9pm; $5

Jam 4 Japan w/ Riddum of Knowledge, Arise, Teomon, Dan De Lion, Lia Live and more, 1pm-1am; $20

Sunday Funday

WED - Therapy Night w/ The Face / Fuzz Box, 10pm; $5

Dave Caroll 7:30-10pm; no cover

Dave Caroll 7:30-10pm; no cover

Erin Smith 7:30-10pm; no cover

MON - Peter D, 7:30-10pm / TUE - Live Jazz, 7-10pm / WED - Ryan Palma, 7:30-10pm (no cover)

Friday’s in the Sky Lounge w/ DJ CIA

DAVID PAUL’S ISLAND GRILL 900 Front St., Lahaina - 662-3000

DIAMONDS ICE BAR

Industry Night 10pm; no cover

The Mary Jane Xperiment - 10pm; no cover

Lil Ras Dread w/ Fiyah Blaze, 10pm; no cover

Jodan & Wolf 10pm; no cover

MON - Gomega / TUE - Super Duppah Reggae Band / WED - House Music (all sets 10pm; no cover)

DOG & DUCK IRISH PUB 1913 S. Kihei Rd. - 875-9669

Quiz Night 8pm; no cover

Jarod 10pm; no cover

Jordan & Wolf 10pm; no cover

Sebrina 10pm; no cover

MON – Big John / TUE – Live Music / WED – Jessica & Kanoa (all sets 10pm; no cover)

GREEN LEAF SPORTS BAR

Ladies’ Night

Roots Judgment 9pm-12am

UFC

Karaoke

WED - Free Pool

Rampage 9pm-Close

Dat Guyz 9pm-Close

Super Dub Tribe 10pm-Close; no cover

Karaoke Industry Night 8pm-Close

MON - Karaoke, 8pm-Close / TUE - Junior Lacuesta, 9pm-Close / WED - Open Mic Night, 9pm-Close

Lahaina Open Mic Night, 7:30-10pm; no cover (all ages)

Sounds of Addiction 8-11:30pm

Free Salsa Lessons 10-11pm / Latin DJ 11pm; $7

MON - Damon Parillo & Danyel Alana / TUE Jessica Rabbitt & Kanoa / WED - Erin Smith (all sets 7:30-10pm; no cover)

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

WED - Karaoke

1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-9299

1088 Lower Main St., Wailuku - 244-4888

HAUI’S LIFE’S A BEACH 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891-8010

HARD ROCK CAFE

900 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7400

ISANA

515 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-8199

time again! Start polishing your beer googles... 3-7pm. A&B Amphitheater / Yokouchi Pavilion, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org SLACK KEY MASTERS SERIES - Thu, May 19. Grammy winner George Kahumoku Jr. opens the show with his musical and storytelling talents, along with special guest composer Sean Na’auao. $25 / $45 VIP (includes artist talk-story session). 7:30pm. Maui Arts and Cultural Center, McCoy Studio Theater, 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org MAPA’S SPRING EXTRAVAGANZA - Sat & Sun, May 21 & 22. MAPA presents three lively shows. The weekend starts Saturday with MAPA’s annual dance recital featuring original choreography. Sunday afternoon, they present a beautiful rendition of “Sleeping Beauty.” $12-$15. 3-7:30pm. Maui Arts and Cultural Center, Castle Theater, 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org COMEDY CENTRAL’S JEFF ROSS - Sat, May 21. Presented by the Maui Celebrity Series. Maui Theatre, 878 Front St. (Old Lahaina Center), Lahaina; 856-7973; mauicelebrityseries.com THE WAYANS BROTHERS - Fri, May 20. Quit thinking “White Girls,” OK? Shawn is famous for his role in “In Living Color” and Marlon’s got “Requiem for a Dream” under his belt. And though Damon won’t be there, his starring role in Spike Lee’s (genius!) flick “Bamboozled” is further proof of their pedigree. $39 / $49 / $59. 7:30pm. Castle Theater, MACC; One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org BARRYFEST: A BENEFIT FOR MANA’O RADIO - Sun, May 22. Celebrating Mana’o Radio’s 9th anniversary, and the life of co-founder Barry Shannon. Kathy Collin hosts this heartfelt tribute to her late husband. This is the annual fundraiser and will feature entertainment by Vince Esquire, Randall Rospond, Dr. Nat, Gail Swanson, SLAM featuring David Choy and Barry Flanagan. Plus, a silent auction and plenty of door prize giveaways. $20 advance / $26 door. Events Lawn, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469);

mauiarts.org / manaoradio.com SHANTALA: “SACRED MUSIC OF INDIA” KIRTAN Sun, May 22. Join Benjy & Heather Wertheimer for an evening of kirtan, sacred music and the sounds of India. Due to popular demand, this is their third visit to Maui. Catering by Monsoon India and Maui Kombucha. $15 advance/$20 door. 7-9pm. The Studio Maui, 810 Haiku Rd, Suite 265, Haiku; 575-9390; thestudiomaui.com DOLLARS FOR SCHOLARS WINE TASTING AND SILENT AUCTION - Fri, May 27. A benefit for the Lahaina Complex After School Enrichment Tutor Project featuring exquisite wine and delicious food. The project’s after school programs are offered at no cost — including bus transportation, materials, supplies and snacks — to hundreds of keiki participants on the West side. $40 per person. 6-9pm. Aina Nalu Pavilion, 660 Front St., Lahaina; 719-282-9011 CITIZEN COPE - Sat, May 28. Some call Citizen Cope “a less smarmy John Mayer crossed with Stevie Wonder and a hint of Randy Newman.” Presented by the Maui Celebrity Series, now in its second year. Features special guests Arise and series creator Brian Evans. $45 - $75. 8-10:30pm. Maui Theatre, 878 Front St. (Old Lahaina Center), Lahaina; 8567973; mauicelebrityseries.com KRIS KRISTOFFERSON FUNDRAISER FOR LOKELANI ‘OHANA - Sat, Jun 4. Kris Kristofferson is helping Lokelani ‘Ohana shed light on the housing crisis for people with developmental disabilities. The Maui-based organization’s work is to create socially therapeutic programs within our community using elements of Native Hawaiian culture and tradition for adults with developmental disabilities. $15 / $30/ $50 / $250 VIP. 7:30pm. Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org / lokelaniohana.org 12TH ANNUAL ZENSHIN DAIKO - Sat, Jun 11. Enjoy an evening of Japanese taiko drumming with Hajicho Drummers from Japan, San Jose Taiko from

California, and Maui’s Zenshin Daiko, in this annual festival concert. $20, kids under 12 half-price. 7:30pm. Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org THE REPUBLIK MUSIC FESTIVAL - Sun, Jun 12. As part of Hard Rock Café’s 40th Anniversary Celebration, BAMP Project presents The Republik Music Festival, featuring Steel Pulse, Matisyahu, Rebelution, The Dirty Heads and The Green. Visit the boys at Requests in Wailuku to get hip to these artists’ albums and to purchase tickets. $39.50 advance / $45 door. 4pm (gates open at 3pm). A&B Amphitheater & Yokouchi Pavillion, MACC; One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org SAVINGS ON FILM FESTIVAL PASSES & VIP PATRON PASSES - Attention movie buffs: If you’re not careful, June 15-19 (i.e. the next Maui Film Festival) will sneak up on you. Start planning ahead by purchasing your passes now through Apr 30, and you’ll be rewarded with killer savings. With a plethora of pass packages to choose from, there’s something for everyone. Visit mauifilmfestival.com for more information. $10 - $7,450. Maui Film Festival, 16 Baldwin Ave., Paia; mauifilmfestival.com 4 FATHERS/4 SONS: HAWAIIAN SLACK KEY ARTISTS - Sat, Jun 18. Celebrate Father’s Day weekend with four famous Hawaiian musical families: Dennis and David Kamakahi; George and Keoki Kahumoku; Kevin and Ikaika Brown; and Richard and Kai Ho’opi’i. $25. 7:30pm. Maui Arts and Cultural Center, McCoy Studio Theater, 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org JOE PISCOPO & BRIAN EVANS - Sat, June 25. Presented by the Maui Celebrity Series. Maui Theatre, 878 Front St. (Old Lahaina Center), Lahaina; 8567973; mauicelebrityseries.com KI HO’ALU GUITAR FESTIVAL - Sun, Jun 26. Enjoy the 20th Anniversary of Maui’s Ki Ho’alu (Slack Key) Guitar Festival with some of Hawaii’s best slack key artists. Free. 2-7pm. A&B Amphitheater & Yokouchi

Pavilion, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org SESAME STREET LIVE, 1-2-3 IMAGINE! WITH ELMO & FRIENDS - Fri, Sat & Sun, July 29-31. Elmo, Abby Cadabby, Big Bird and all your kids’ favorite Sesame Street Characters will be on hand to entertain. Full of energy and adventure, Ernie captains the high seas, Elmo dances to the rhythm of the African rainforest and Bert meets an octopus who has the blues. Too cool. Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org JAMIE KENNEDY - Sat, July 30. Presented by the Maui Celebrity Series. Maui Theatre, 878 Front St. (Old Lahaina Center), Lahaina; 856-7973; mauicelebrityseries.com JIM BRICKMAN - Sun, Aug 7. Brickman is a platinumselling artist who’s celebrated for revolutionizing the sound of solo piano with his pop instrumentals and star-studded vocal collaborations. $25 / $35 / $50 / $65 (VIP). 3pm. Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org ANDREW DICE CLAY - Sat, Aug 13. Presented by the Maui Celebrity Series. Maui Theatre, 878 Front St. (Old Lahaina Center), Lahaina; 856-7973; mauicelebrityseries.com

FOODIE COOKING WITH CHEF SUSAN - Every Thu. Join Chef Susan Teton for some fun and healthy recipes that nourish the body and soul! This month’s mouth-watering recipe features a Molokai sweet potato frittata. 6pm. Whole Foods Market, 70 Kaahumanu Ave #B, Kahului; 872-3310; wholefoodsmarket.com/maui ACUPUNCTURE & HERBS WITH JOHN - Every Mon & Wed. Acupuncture & Herbs with John Motley, licensed acupuncturist and well-versed guru in the healing arts of herbs, will be in the store to provide shoppers with information and free demos of this healing craft. 4pm. Whole Foods Market, 70 Kaahumanu Ave #B, Kahului; 872-3310; wholefoodsmarket.com/maui

APRIL 28, 2011 23

TheGRID

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY

04/28

04/29

04/30

05/01

05/02 - 05/04

FIND THE GRID ONLINE AT MAUITIME.COM/GRID OR TO HAVE YOUR BUSINESS ADDED TO OUR WEEKLY GRID SEND YOUR INFORMATION TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

JAVA JAZZ

Renee Alonzo 7pm - Close; no cover

Farzad & Mike Madden 7pm - Close; no cover

Farzad & Mike Madden 7pm - Close; no cover

Brian Cuomo 7pm - Close; no cover

MON - Ashley Welte / TUE - Ras Shaggai / WED - Howard Ahia (All 7pm - Close; no cover)

KAHALE’S

Vince Esquire

Kenny Roberts

Eight Track Players

Kahala

MON through WED - Da-Ha-Y-Ns

Ladies’ Night 6pm-close; no cover

Billy & The Bad Dogs 9pm-12am

Bob Jones & The Drive 8-11pm

Gina Martinelli Band 6-9pm

MON - Karaoke Night, 6pm-12am / TUE - Pool Night, 6pm-12am / WED - Kiwi Cowboys 7-10pm

KOBE STEAKHOUSE

Karaoke & Dancing w/ Aunty Toddy Lilikoi 9:30-Close; no cover

Karaoke & Dancing w/ Aunty Toddy Lilikoi 9:30-Close; no cover

LONGHI’S LAHAINA

Crazy Fingers 9pm-1am; no cover Karaoke w/ Manino 7:30-11pm; no cover

MON - Service Industry Night WED - Karaoke w/ Manino, 7:30-11 pm

3350 L. Honoapiilani Rd. 667-0787

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei 875-7711

KIWI ROADHOUSE

95 E. Lipoa St., Ste A101, Kihei - 874-1250

136 Dickenson St., Lahaina - 667-5555

888 Front St., Lahaina - 667-2288

Salsa w/ Nat, 8-11pm DJ Nexus, 11pm-Close

Louise Lambert, 7:30-10:30pm / DJ Canespider, 11pm-Close

Easy Listening w/ Neto 8-10pm DJ AstroRaph, 10pm-Close

Howard Ahia

Cyrus Clark

Live DJ Music

MERRIMAN’S

Ranga Pae

Ranga Pae

Ranga Pae

MOANA CAFE

Phil & Angie Benoit

LULU’S KIHEI

1945 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-9944

LULU’S LAHAINA

Lahaina Cannery Mall - 661-0808

1 Bay Club Pl., Kapalua - 669-6400

71 Baldwin Ave., Paia - 579-9999

MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE 100 Kaukahi St. Kihei - 874-1131

1819 S. Kihei Rd. - 891-2414

PINEAPPLE GRILLE

200 Kapalua Drv. Lahaina - 669-9600

BUY LOCAL, EAT LOCAL: A HOW-TO DEMO - Fri, Apr 29. Whole Foods Market celebrates what’s salivating about seasonal, locally grown produce with a cooking demonstration. Free. 11am. Whole Foods Market, 70 Kaahumanu Ave #B, Kahului; 872-3310; wholefoodsmarket.com/maui HEALTHY SATURDAYS - Every Sat. Jump into a healthier way of cooking! Whole Foods Market will be dishing up a demonstration of the best Health Starts Here recipes. Stop by to ask questions, sample nutrient-dense ingredients and get great recipes to try at home! Free. 3pm. Whole Foods Market, 70 Kaahumanu Ave #B, Kahului; 872-3310; wholefoodsmarket.com/maui FREE VEGETARIAN COOKING CLASSES - Every Tue. See and sample how Andrea Bertoli, Down to Earth’s vegan chef, uses local, organic and wholesome ingredients to make healthy and delicious entrées, soups, breakfasts, and deserts. Free. 5:306:30pm. Down To Earth, 305 Dairy Rd., Kahului; 8772661; downtoearth.org HEALTHY OHANA COOKING CLASSES - Every Wed. Join Whole Foods Markets Healthy Eating Specialist for a class focused on fun ways to prepare Health Starts Here recipes! Parents, guardians, friends and keiki ages five to 12 are welcome to participate in this fun and easy class. free. 4pm. Whole Foods Market, 70 Kaahumanu Ave #B, Kahului; 872-3310; wholefoodsmarket.com/maui “MEALS ON A BUDGET” RECIPE SHOWCASE WITH SHARLA - Every Wed. Looking for the great recipes on a budget? Join demo diva Sharla for a delicious recipe that will satisfied the entire family without breaking the bank (less than $3 per serving). Free. 5pm. Whole Foods Market, 70 Kaahumanu Ave #B, Kahului; 8723310; wholefoodsmarket.com/maui

Gail Swanson 6:30-8:30pm

DJ Joe Cortez 6pm-12am

Spring Break Bash w/ DJ Stylz - 10pm; no cover

Reggae in the Valley PreConcert Series w/ Fiji, Siosi, Laga Savea and Hot Rain 10pm; $20 cover

Jawaiian Music w/ DJ Bruddah Damien and will dole out a $100 cash prize. $10 ($5 before 9:30pm). 9:30pm. Casanova, 1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao; 572-0220; casanovamaui.com

FRIDAY, APRIL 29 MAUI ACADEMY OF PERFORMING ARTS - Live Performance. Free. 6:30pm. Maui Mall, 70 E. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului; 871-1307; mauimall.com FINAL FRIDAY ON THE NORTH SHORE - Peruse Paia’s chic sea-shanty shops while you wine and dine at some of the hippest eateries on the isle. Free. 6-9pm. Paia Town, Paia; paiamaui.com 19TH ANNUAL EAST MAUI TARO FESTIVAL: DAY 1 OF 3- Begins to day with special tours around Hana Bay on the Makali’i Voyaging Canoe. Continues on Saturday (April 30) and Sunday (May 1). See This Week’s Picks for more. 9am-4pm. Hana Ballpark. tarofestival.org FEATURED ARTIST EXHIBITION OPENING - Sculptor and goldsmith Barclay Hill will be the gallery’s featured artist April 29 to May 12. Meet the him at this free opening reception, featuring live music and refreshments (during Paia’s Final Friday celebration). Free. 6:30-9pm. Maui Crafts Guild, 69 Hana Highway, Paia; 579-9697; facebook.com/mauicraftsguild GRAND OPENING: WOMEN HELPING WOMEN’S REVIVE STORE - This sweet little shop boasts chic, curated clothes—at great prices and for a great cause. Women Helping Women will use this store as a vocational training center for their clients, and you can help them celebrate their grand opening by attending (and shopping, of course)! Free. 4pm. ReVive, Old Kahului Shopping Center, Kahului; whwmaui.net

SATURDAY, APRIL 30

THURSDAY, APRIL 28

DA KIDNEY DA KINE DAY - A health fair featuring comprehensive kidney screenings and consultations with medical professionals, plus live entertainment, and a keiki craft booth. Free. 10am-2pm. Queen Kaahumanu Shopping Center, 275 W. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului; 986-1900; kidneyhi.org

MAUI SLAMS FOR A HEALTHIER EARTH - From serenades of love for Mother Earth to screeds against those who hurt her, the mimetic eco-effusings at Maui SLAM’s Earth Day inspired event are sure to run the gamut. This month, Maui SLAM asks its poets (sign up before 9:30pm) to tackle the topic of climate change

19TH ANNUAL EAST MAUI TARO FESTIVAL: DAY 2 OF 3 - Main day events featuring 22 food booths, 40 artisan and craft booths, plus entertainment, demonstrations and more. Also on Friday (April 28) and Sunday (May 1). 9am-5pm. See This Week’s Picks for more. 9am-4pm. Hana Ballpark. tarofestival.org

EVENTS

24 APRIL 28, 2011

Ranga Pae

TUE - David Choy / WED - Ranga Pae

DJ Music

Pub Quiz Night w/ Trish “The Dish” Smith, 9pm-12am

OCEANS BAR & GRILL

MON - All Access DJs, 10pm / TUE “Lahaina Idol” w/ Troy 9pm-12am / WED Kenny Roberts 5-8pm

TUE - Open Mic Night The Celtic Tigers w/ Roger McKinley, 6:30-9:30pm

Mon - Rocking ‘80s Party 10pm-12am / Tue - Murray Thorne 6:30-8:30pm / WED Willie K, 7-9pm; Jordan & Wolf, 10pm-12am

Smooth Jazz Sounds w/ Brian Cuomo & Friends, 7pm -10m CARDEN COUNTRY JAMBOREE - Sat, Apr 30. Enjoy an evening under the stars with a paniolo themed dinner and dancing. Plus, live art from Betty Hay Freeland and George Allan, and much more. 5-11:30pm. Oskie-Rice Outdoor Polo Field, Makawao; cardenacademyofmaui.org MALAMA AINA FESTIVAL AT WHOLE FOODS MARKET - Meet the people behind some of your favorite nonprofits, learn more about the environmental challenges we face and how to contribute to a greener more sustainable Maui. Free. 11am-3pm. Whole Foods Market, 70 Kaahumanu Ave #B, Kahului; 872-3310; wholefoodsmarket.com/maui FREE CHILD CAR SEAT INSPECTIONS - Free child car seat inspections will be held at Kaiser Wailuku for both Kaiser members and non-members. Free. 10am-1pm. Kaiser Permanente- Wailuku Clinic, 80 Mahalani St., Wailuku; 268-3708; kp.org VALLEY ISLE KENNEL CLUB 35TH ALL BREED DOG SHOW - Obedience and rally trials held today. Continues on Sunday (May 1). 10am. War Memorial Soccer Field, Wailuku; 572-0257 / 573-1192 HARURU TOA - Live Performance. Free. 1pm. Maui Mall, 70 E. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului; 871-1307; mauimall.com MASTER CLASS WITH GABRIELLA BENGIS & DONNA DELORY - A special event fusing yoga and music. Bengis provides a hatha flow class—appropriate for all levels—inspired by the beautiful lyrical voice of Donna DeLory. $20 advance / $25 door. 8:30-10:30pm. The Studio Maui, 810 Haiku Rd, Suite 265, Haiku; 575-9390; thestudiomaui.com MAUI ONSTAGE BENEFIT & SNEAK PEEK OF SHOWS - Held at the home of Hall Jobe & Gary Mohrlang at the Wailuku Country Estates. Sip wine from Whole Foods and dine on enticing dishes catered by Soup to Nuts. Includes entertainment by Jerry Eiting, Casey Murphy, Mark Collmer, Lee Garrow, Michael Pulliam, Steven Dascoulias, and Benoit Jazz Works. $135 individual / $250 couple. 5pm. Directions provided with ticket. 2448680; mauionstage.com

SUNDAY, MAY 1 MAY DAY CELEBRATION AT KAPALUA RESORT - On May 1 from 10 am to 2 pm there will be May Day festivities (including lei making contests, Hawaiian enter-

tainment, cultural activities, as well as arts and crafts) at the Honolua Village Center (Kapalua Resort). Kapalua Resort, 800 Kapalua Dr., Kapalua; 669-244-8206 19TH ANNUAL EAST MAUI TARO FESTIVAL DAY 3 OF 3 - Final day of festivities. Features a taro pancake breakfast (7:30-10:30am), and tours of the Kahanu Garden and Pi’ilanihale Heiau (11am) and Kapahu Living Farm (2pm). See This Week’s Picks for more. 9am-4pm. Hana Ballpark. tarofestival.org VALLEY ISLE KENNEL CLUB 36TH ALL BREED DOG SHOW - Obedience and rally trials held today. Continued from Saturday (April 30). 9am. War Memorial Soccer Field, Wailuku; 572-0257 / 573-1192 MANA’O RADIO UPCOUNTRY SUNDAY ACOUSTIC STYLE - Featuring Bobby Ingram, Matt Hartke, Dorothy Bets and Les Adam. $7 donation. 2pm. Casanova, 1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao, 572-0220 MAUI EARTH DAY FESTIVAL - An Earth-lovers’ fest for the whole family—with the theme “Live Consciously, Consume Sustainably”—nestled in the tree-shaded amphitheater behind the Maui Nui Botanical Gardens. Groove to the conscious tunes of The Freeradicals Projekt, Maui Underground, Divino’s All Stars, Omar & The Soultones, Haiku Hillbillys, Maesyn, Sounds of Jah, The Gerit Williams Band and many more. Plus, guest speakers like Maui County environmental coordinator Rob Parsons, health officer Lorrin Pang, Surfrider Foundation Maui Chapter chairperson Tim Lara, filmmaker Michael Murphy and Maui Permaculture Network director Claire Kellerman. Enjoy food vendors and bring your own non-breakable plates, cups and utensils. $7 (free for keiki). 10am-5pm. Ke’opualani Park, 280-8596; mauiearthday.org THE BROTHERS CAZIMERO - Hawaiian music band, The Brothers Cazimero, perform for their annual “May Day- Lei Day” concert at the Castle Theater. $12, $28, $37. 7:30pm. Maui Arts and Cultural Center, Castle Theater, 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org SENIOR SUNDAY IN IAO - Maui residents ages 60 and better can enjoy the beautiful Hawai`i Nature Center for free once a month. Regular fare is $6 for adults, $4 for keiki. Free for Seniors. Hawai’i Nature Center, 244-6500; hawaiinaturecenter.org BOARDSWAP - Gather with other surfers to buy, sell or

MONDAY 7:30-10PM ALL AGES NO COVER

TUESDAYS 7:30-10PM ALL AGES NO COVER

WEDNESDAYS 7:30-10PM ALL AGES NO COVER

ERIN SMITH

JESSICA RABBITT & KANOA “PLUG IN AND WIN” LONDON TRIP GIVEAWAY HOSTED BY KAOI RADIO

THURSDAYS 9-CLOSE

OPEN MIC

ALL AGES NO COVER

SIGN UPS AT 9PM

FRIDAYS 8PM - CLOSE NO COVER 21+ AFTER FOOD SERVICE

SATURDAYS 10PM-CLOSE ALL AGES NO COVER

GOT TALENT?

SOUNDS OF ADDICTION

SALSA CLASSES STARTING AT 10PM LATIN MUSIC 11PM - $7

NEW SIGNATURE SERIES SHIRTS ARE IN!

900 FRONT ST. +1-808-667-7400

APRIL 28, 2011 25

TheGRID

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY

04/28

04/29

04/30

05/01

05/02 - 05/04

FIND THE GRID ONLINE AT MAUITIME.COM/GRID OR TO HAVE YOUR BUSINESS ADDED TO OUR WEEKLY GRID SEND YOUR INFORMATION TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

SANSEI - KAPALUA

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

SANSEI - KIHEI

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE

DJ Slackin 10pm-Close; no cover

DJ Sonny 10pm-Close; no cover

DJ LX 10pm-Close; no cover

Live Music 9pm-12am; no cover

Live Music 9pm-12am; no cover

Ladies’ Night 7pm-close

Kanaka Jam 7:30-11:30pm; no cover

Ah-Tim

115 Bay Dr., Lahaina - 669-6286

1881 S. Kihei Rd., Ste. KT116 -879-0004

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-6444

Kanoa of Gomega 10pm-Close; no cover

MON - DJ Blast / TUE - DJ LX / WED - The ADD Twins (All sets 10pm - Close; no cover)

Pool Night

Free Pupus Night

MON - Mahalo Monday / TUE - Tennis League Night / WED - DJ Dance Party

Supper Club feat. John Cruz 6-9pm; $30/$60

Supper Club feat. John Cruz 6-9pm; $30/$60

Slam feat. David Choy 7-10pm

MON - Tom Cherry & Mike Finkeiwicz; Slam feat. David Choy / TUE - Tom Conway / WED - Randall Rospond

Karaoke w/ Pearl Rose 9:15pm-12am; no cover

Maui Underground 9pm-1am; $3

Karaoke w/ Pearl Rose 9pm-12am; no cover

‘80s Night

Kanekoa and Visibly Shaken

Mojomana

Live Music

Live Music

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

MON through WED- Karaoke

Industry Night 9pm-2am; no cover

Undone w/ Ross Q 9:30pm-2am; $10

Spun Out w/ DJ Calcul8 9pm-2am; $10

Closed

MON through WED - Closed

Ladies’ Night 9pm-1:30am; $10

College Night: Next Lvl DJs 9pm-2am; $5/$10 (18+)

Roots Judgement 10pm

Hot Hawaiian Saturdays w/ Ikaika Blackburn, 10pm

Free Karaoke

MON - Free Karaoke / TUE - Thirsty Tuesday & Free Karaoke / WED - Free Karaoke

SPORTS PAGE GRILL & BAR 2411 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-0602

STEEL HORSE SALOON 1234 L. Main St., Wailuku - 243-2206

STELLA BLUE’S

1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-3779

STOPWATCH SPORTS BAR 1127 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-1380

THREE’S BAR & GRILL 1945 S Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-3133

TIA JUANA’S BEACH CANTINA 2291 Kaanapali Pkwy. - 667-4080

TIFFANY’S

1424 L. Main St., Wailuku - 249-0052

TIMBA

505 Front St, Ste. 212, Lahaina - 661-9873

THE UNDERGROUND 744 Front St., Lahaina

WATERCRESS

Waiehu Beach Center, Wailuku-243-9350

WOW-WEE MAUI’S

333 Dairy Rd. #101, Kahului - 871-1414

trade boards. 4-6pm. Local Motion, Lahaina Gateway, 305 Keawe St., Lahaina; 661-7873; lahainagateway.com/

WEDNESDAY, MAY 4 SCHOOL BENEFIT WITH MR. MANUEL “MANNY” C. MENENDEZ III - Menendez leads an interactive informational dialog titled “Establishing Successful Business Relations with China,” focusing on important, yet little known aspects of doing business in China and attracting Chinese investors. Reservations recommended. $15 suggested donation. 6-8:30pm. Kihei Charter High School, 300 Ohukai Rd. #209, Kihei; 875-0700

DINNER MUSIC WEST MAUI CANOES - Fri & Sat, Ras Shaggai 5:30-8:30pm; Sun, Indapkt 3-6pm. 1450 Front St., Lahaina, 661-0937. COOL CAT CAFE - Every Thu, Junior & Oren 7:30-10pm; Every Fri & Sat, Dave Carroll 7:30-10pm; Every Sun, Erin Smith 7:30-10pm; Every Mon, Peter D 7:30-10pm; Every Tue, live Jazz 7-10pm; Every Wed, Ryan Palma 7:30-10pm. Wharf Cinema Center, Front St., Lahaina, 667-0908. DUKE’S BEACH HOUSE - Thu, Damien 3–5pm, Garrett & Peter 6–8:30pm; Fri, Garrett 3-5pm, Kulewa 6-8:30pm; Sat, Mondo 3-5pm, Kulewa 6-8:30pm; Sun, Mondo 3-5pm, Ron & Miles 6-8:30pm; Every Mon, Brian 3-5pm, Damien & Edee 6-8:30pm; Every Tue & Wed, Brian 3-5pm, Alika & Eddie 6-8:30pm. 130 Kai Malina Pkwy., Lahaina, 662-2900. HARD ROCK CAFE - Every Thu, all-ages Open Mic Night 9pm; Every Mon, Damon Parillo and Danyel Alana 7:30-10pm; Every Tue, Ryan Palma 7:30-10pm; Every Wed, Erin Smith 7:30-10pm. 900 Front St., Lahaina, 667-7400. HULA GRILL - Thu, Bruddah Larry 11:30am-1pm, Ernest Pua’a 2-4pm, Armadillo 4:15-6:15pm, Kulewa 6:309pm; Fri, Ernest Pua’a 11:30am-1pm, Kawika Lum Ho 2-4pm, 1810 4:15-6:15pm, Kawika, Roy, & Tarvin 6:309pm; Sat, Jack Stone 11:30am-1pm, Kawika Lum Ho 2-4pm, 1810 4:15-6:15pm, Wili Pa 6:30-9pm; Sun, Ron Hetteen 11:30-1pm, Kawika Lum Ho 2-4pm, 1810 4:156:15pm, Derrick Sebastian Trio 6:30-9pm; Mon, Ernest Pua’a 11:30am-1pm, Kawika Lum Ho 2-4pm, Armadillo

26 APRIL 28, 2011

Next Level Entertainment 10pm

WED - Eddie & The Promises w/ Friends 8:30-11:30pm; $3

Karaoke no cover; 8pm

MON through WED - Dat Guyz; no cover

4:15-6:15pm, Derrick Sebastian & Josh Kahula 6:309pm; Tue, Kawika Lum Ho 11:30am-1pm, Jarrett Roback 2-4pm, Ernest Pua’a 4:15-6:15pm, Ernest Pua’a & Friends 6:30-9pm.; Wed, Mika Villaren 11:30am-1pm, Ernest Pua’a 2-4pm, Peter DeAquino 4:15-6:15pm, Ernest, Roy, & Tarvin 6:30-9pm. Whaler’s Village, 2435 Ka’anapali Pkwy., Bldg P, Lahaina, 667-6636.

S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 891-1011

Kihei, 875-2910.

BEACH BUMS BAR & GRILL - Every Fri, Tom Cherry & Mike F. 5-9pm; Every Tue, Randall Rospond 5-8pm. 300 Maalaea Rd. #1M, Maalaea, 243-2286.

THREE’S BAR & GRILL - Thu, live Jazz 7pm; Fri, Jeff 7pm; Sat, Steff Lomeli 7pm; Mon, Cyrus Clark 7pm; Tue, Gerit Williams 7-9pm. 1945-G S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 879-3133.

CAPISCHE? - Every Fri & Sat, Mark Johnstone 7-10pm. 555 Kaukahi St., Kihei, 879-2224.

JAVA JAZZ - Thu, Rene Alonzo; Fri & Sat, Farzad & Mike Madden; Sun, Brian Cuomo; Mon, Ashley Welte; Tue, Ras Shaggai; Wed, Howard Ahia (all sets 7pm). 3550 L. Honoapiilani Rd., Lahaina, 667-0787.

HAUI’S LIFE’S A BEACH - Every Thu, Junior Lacuesta; Every Fri, Mon &Tue, Rick Glencross; Every Sat, Ryan Robinson; Every Wed, Jordan Cudworth. (All Sets 4-8pm.) Sun, Mon & Tue, Karaoke 8pm; Wed, Open Mic 9pm. 1913 S. Kihei Rd., #E, Kihei, 874-1250.

THE RED BAR AT GANNON’S, A PACIFIC VIEW RESTAURANT - Thu, Fulton Tashombe & Special Guests 6-8pm; Tue, Braddah Larry Golis 6-8pm. Wailea Golf Club House, 100 Wailea Golf Club Dr., Wailea, 875-8080.

LAHAINA PIZZA COMPANY - Every Wed, Thu & Fri, John Kane 7:30-9:30pm; Sat, Harry Troupe 7:309:30pm; Sun, Greg Di Piazza 7:30-9:30pm; Every Mon & Tue, Martin Tevaga 7:30-9:30pm. 730 Front St., Lahaina, 661-0700. LEILANI’S ON THE BEACH - Fri, The J.D. on the Rocks Band 2:30-5pm; Sat, J.D. & Harry 2:30-5pm; Sun, Kilohana 2:30-5pm. Whaler’s Village, 2435 Ka’anapali Pkwy. Bldg. J, Ka’anapali, 661-4495. LULU’S LAHAINA SURF CLUB & GRILL - Every Thu, Classic Rock Thursdays featuring Howard Ahia 6-8pm; Fri, Cyrus Clark 5-7pm; Every Mon, Junior 6-8pm. Wed, Kenny Roberts 5-8pm. Lahaina Cannery Mall, 1221 Honoapiilani Hwy. #A1, Lahaina, 661-0808. MERRIMAN’S - Wed-Sun, Ranga Pae; Mon, Benoit Jazzworks; Tue, David Choy. All sets 6-9pm. 1 Bay Club Pl., Lahaina, 669-6400. ONO BAR & GRILL - Thu & Tue, Benny Uyetake; Sat, Kealii Lum; Sun, Mitch Keppa; Wed, Scott Baird (all sets 6-9ppm). Westin Maui Resort & Spa, 2365 Kaanapali Pkwy., 667-2525. PIONEER INN GRILL & BAR - Wed, Greg DiPiazza 6-8pm; Tue, Ah Tim 5:30-8:30pm. 658 Wharf St., Lahaina, 661-8881. SEA HOUSE RESTAURANT - Every Tue & Fri, Kincaid Kupahu 7-9pm; Every Sun & Thu, Andrew Kaina 7-9pm; Sat, Coehlo Morrison 7-9pm; Every Mon & Wed, Albert Kaina 7-9pm. 5900 Lower Honoapiilani Hwy., Napili, 669-1500.

SOUTH MAUI AMBROSIA - Every Thu, Jamie Gallo 7pm; Every Tue, “Glee” screening 7pm. Every Wed, Red Carpet Movie Night (this week: “The Breakfast Club”) 7:30pm. 1913

KAI WAILEA - Thu, Mon & Sun, Wolf; Fri, Ryan Robinson; Sat, Kanoa; Mon, Tom Conway; Wed, Francois (all sets 6-8:30pm). 3750 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 875-1955. KIWI ROADHOUSE - Thu & Mon, Karaoke 6pm; Fri, Mango Pickers 6-8pm; Sun, Gina Martinelli Band 6pm-close; Wed, Kiwi Cowboys 7-10pm. 95 E. Lipoa St., Ste. A101, Kihei, 874-1250. MONSOON INDIA - Every Sat, Romantic Violin & Guitar Duets by Cambria Moss & Ricardo Dioso 6:30-8:30pm; Mon, Louise Lambert 6-9pm; Every Tue, Hula Honeys 5:30-8:30pm. 760 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 875-6666. MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE - Thu, Murray Thorne 6:30-8:30pm; Fri, Gail Swanson 6:30-8:30pm; Sat, DJ Joe Cortez 6pm-12am. Sun, Celtic Tigers with Mad Bagpiper Roger McKinley 6:30-9:30pm; Tue, Murray Thorne 6:30-8:30pm; Wed, Avi & Indio 5:45-7pm, Willie K 7-9pm. 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea, 874-1131. PITA PARADISE WAILEA - Sun, Benoit Jazzworks 5:307:30pm. 34 Wailea Gateway Plaza, Wailea, 879-7177. SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE - Every Thu, Erin Smith; Every Fri, Randall Rospond; Every Sat, Tom Conway; Every Sun, Viva La Rumba; Every Mon, Kanoa; Every Tue, Sebrina Barron; Every Wed, Wolf. (All Sets 4-6pm.) Kihei Kalama Village, 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 874-6444. STELLA BLUES CAFE - Every Thu, Ah Tim 4-6pm; Every Fri, Ahumanu 4-6pm; Fri & Sat, Supper Club featuringJohn Cruz 6-9pm; Every Sun & Wed, Slam featuring David Choy 7-10pm; Every Mon, Tom Cherry & Mike Finkeiwicz 4-6pm; Every Tue, Tom Conway 4-6pm; Every Wed, Randall Rospond 4-8pm. 1279 South Kihei Rd., # 201, Kihei, 874-3779. TAQUERIA CRUZ - Every Tue & Sat, live music - Reggae, Jazz, Blues 5:30-8:30pm. 2395 S. Kihei Rd. #112,

TRADEWINDS POOLSIDE CAFE - Every Thu, Island Favorites with Kawika Lum Ho; Every Fri, Girls Nite Out with Gina Martinelli; Every Sat, Classic Rock with Dominic; Every Sun, Ron Shadian & Friends; Every Mon, Bobby Ingram & Frriends; Every Tue, Mike and Mark; Every Wed, Steve Sargenti. 2259 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 891-8860.

CENTRAL MAUI ALE HOUSE - Every Fri, Braddah Francis 4-8pm; Every Tue, Braddah Francis 4-7pm. Every Mon, Terri Garrison 4-7pm. 355 E. Kamehameha Ave., Kahului, 877-9001. CAFE O’LEI AT THE DUNES AT MAUI LANI - Every Thu, Reiko Fukina 5:30-8pm; Every Fri & Sat, Phil and Angela Benoit 5:30-8pm.1333 Maui Lani Pkwy., Kahului, 877-0073. CARY & EDDIE’S HIDEAWAY RESTAURANT - Daily, Francois 6-9pm; Every Sun, Fausto 9am-1pm. 500 N. Puunene Ave., Kahului, 873-6555.

UPCOUNTRY MAUI CAFE DES AMIS - Every Thu, Joe Conte plays The Chapman Stick; Every Sat, live Argentinian music; Every Wed, The Stone Violets 6:30-8:30pm. 42 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-6323. GREEN BANANA CAFE - Every Tue, Thu & Sat, Polynesian Dance Coffee Luau 6pm.137 Hana Hwy., Paia, 579-9130. KULA LODGE - Sat & Sun, Jazz music. 15200 Haleakala Hwy., Kula, 878-1535. LOCAL MOCHA CAFE - Fri & Sat, live music 6-8pm. 81 Makawao Ave., Pukalani, 573-2859. MAX WORLD BISTRO - Fri, Tatyana 6:30-8:30pm; Sat, Randall Rospond 6:30-9pm; Sun, Jazz music 6:309pm; Tue, Rakhal Kincaid 6:30-9pm; Wed, Brooks Maguire 6:30-9pm. 810 Kokomo Rd., Haiku, 575-2629. MOANA BAKERY & CAFE - Every Thu, Phil & Angela Benoit 6:30-8:30pm; Every Tue, Open Mic Night 6pm. 71 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-9999.

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BY ANU YAGI

KULA KID

anu@mauitime.com + @anuheayagi on Twitter

The Meaning Of Hawaiian, Part 1

A I MAIU AL

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28 APRIL 28, 2011

s most local kids do, at the dawn of my adulthood I made a pilgrimage to the Mainland. The whims of my world brought me to a little town called Waldo, just minutes from downtown Kansas City and a few blocks from the Kansas/Missouri state line. I lived in a century-old barn house that was once a local church. It sat conspicuously caddy corner to a sprawling lawn called “Sunnyside Park,” and when Spring came to that place I was blown away by how so much life could burst from the cold, dead earth. Despite being from so far away, Kansas City was good to me—and I hope I was good to it. The people were kind, the weather was wild and my arteries survived massive amounts of BBQ burnt ends. But as much as I loved it, my heart was desperate for home. So while I was there I found work at Tommy Bahama in a downtown shopping district, where I relished the amusingly melancholy way the snowfall painted the world opaque save the silhouette of the shop’s barred windows, made to look more pleasant with palm trees cut from cast iron. But mostly, I liked working at Tommy Bahama because so many of our clients were en route to our islands. I took no greater pleasure than bragging about Hawaii as helpfully as I could, making tailored recommendations as to where they might go and what they might eat (or whatever). One day, a young Missouri man came in wearing all-Brooks Brothers and the kind of glasses that were very obviously Malcolm X-inspired. He talked as smooth as he looked and I admired that. He was, as with many of our customers (oh, excuse me, Mr. Bahama, I meant “guests”), considering a trip to the tropics, and I pitched him hard as to why Hawaii is bar none the best. At some point he asked me my ethnicity and I, feeling proud, succinctly said “Hawaiian” (instead of my usual poi dog run down). “No,” he said, his pupils locked with mine. “I asked about your race.” “Hawaiian,” I said again, confused. “No,” he shook his head. From the sinking look on his face, I could see his impression of me was diminishing. “That’s like being from Texas and saying you’re Texan.” My blood boiled. “OK then, kanaka ma‘oli,” I said curtly.

Unconvinced, he just shrugged skeptically. So we continued to haphazardly row ourselves down and around every tributary from the river of race-based discourse. We talked for much longer than it felt. Finally, he’d exhausted trying on every garment in the store (most of our debate was done shouting through the dressing room door) and I told him he had to make a purchase so I could close the registers and go home. I had a number of conversations like that in Kansas City. Well, not quite like that (the others were generally witless and uninspired). But I chose this glasses-wearing guy as my best example because no matter how heated we got—and though we parted ways with no perfect consensus—it was all well-intentioned. Like the city at large, I enjoyed learning about him and I think he enjoyed learning about me. And best of all, it got me to thinking: There’s always been an acute sensation broiling in my gut—an earnest feeling of overwhelming care for this place and its people, kanaka or no. But what to do with that feeling, I’ve never quite known. See, I really like the spirit behind stuff like the Hawaiian Sovereignty Movement. I like it because it speaks to my heart’s desire to see everyone on our islands strong and exalted. But frankly, I don’t think there’s any current proposition of sovereignty—or whatever—that’s remotely feasible. Further, the discussions surrounding those ideas are too often wrought with pettiness and rhetoric. I know that sentiment isn’t going to sit well with a lot of people. The irony is that I love those people (who might now despise me) and they’re exactly the folks I want to start a conversation with. I’m the first to admit I still have everything to learn—and I want desperately to learn it. I like that my column affords me the opportunity to talk about silly little things, but this is a big thing that means a lot to me, even more than it did in that Tommy Bahama in KC. So, dear readers—you like talk story? ■

To read more Kula Kid with links and photos and stuff, and to leave comments, visit mauifeed.com/kulakid To share or save: mt.hy.pr/1445k

BY CAERIEL CRESTIN

HOROSCOPE

sign.language.astrology@gmail.com +

Sign Language TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20) Imagine if you were limited to only ten foods for the rest of your life. Not only would you have trouble remaining healthy and fit on such a diet, you’d surely get bored and sick of them pretty quickly, no matter how much you loved them at first. That’s true of all the things you adore right now. Don’t wear them out! Put that beloved song on repeat and you’ll never want to hear it again next month. Spread the love to make it last. Mix things up. You want to want this stuff (or that person) a year or ten years from now? You know what to do. GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20) Rationally, you should be able to recognize that what’s important to you isn’t necessarily all that critical or even interesting to those around you. Sure, you can twist someone’s arm to participate anyway. But imagine how it would feel to let them off the hook—then consider doing it. Of course, if you do make the offer, really mean it—don’t use it as some kind of loyalty test. If you tell them they can skip out, don’t get pissed if they happily do so. They probably will! If that’s not okay, don’t pretend for even a second that it is. CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22) No one holds a grudge like a slighted Crab. But consider what you actually get out of hanging on to those negative feelings—generally, nothing. In the meantime, it makes you unpleasant to be around, and hard to live inside your own head. Rationally, realize that letting go of that shit, while extremely challenging, is the only healthy path to an overall happier place. That doesn’t mean you need to forgive those who wronged you, or pretend nothing happened—but nursing resentment will only make everyone around you uncomfortable. See if you can just take them off your radar instead. LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22) If, for some unknown reason you woke up tomorrow a redhead, a different race, or the opposite gender, you’d be a medical anomaly—but you’d still be yourself. People would perceive you differently, and you’d perceive yourself differently, but you’d still be you. Wouldn’t you want people to believe that you’re who you say you are—despite what they perceive you to be, based entirely on your looks? When someone tells you about themselves, try to take them at their word, even if it conflicts with what you’d guessed. Sometimes, people will lie—but that’s not likely to be the case this week. VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22) Be a creative communicator this week. Imagine two people have the same message, but one simply “states the facts,” while the other gets the point across and makes people laugh, too. Who do you think will enjoy not only a better reception, but a more attentive audience? You don’t need to be a comedian. But try to think of ways to convey your thoughts and also add joy or fun to someone’s day. You’ll not only be more effective, but also get better results from relatively little effort on your part. You don’t have to try hard (which would probably backfire); you just have to try. LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22) Every scenario has its price of admission. Whether it’s a relationship, a job, or even a fun time with friends, there will probably be things that you’re not crazy about, but have to put up with in order to be there. Your duty this week is to figure out, as quickly as possible, exactly what the price of admission is and whether or not you’re willing to “pay” it, so you can spare everyone the hassle and annoyance of a lot of wasted time and effort. This isn’t always clear as a sign posted at the door, but you should be able to figure out what’s up pretty quickly nevertheless; when in doubt, just ask. SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21) Coercing someone (through whatever means) to do as you wish is a dangerous business. If your influence or hold over them is powerful enough to get them to do whatever it is

QUIZunderstood ANSWERS ...to questions on page 7

they’re reluctant to do, it might be potent enough to compel them to take other action instead—action you might not like. Forcing someone’s hand is a risky business in a card game— it’s even more so in life. As exciting as it is, it’s not always your best option; in this case, it’s probably completely unnecessary. Therefore, try a less dramatic course.

1. Being forced to reveal sources

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC.21) Occasionally, your decision isn’t about whether or not to tell the truth (generally, if you’re a reasonably evolved Sagittarian, you’re honest to a fault), but how much truth to tell. Sometimes there are things you know that aren’t your responsibility or even right to share. This is a tricky moral call to make, and I expect you to struggle with it a little. It’s not always a clear-cut line. Do you tell a stranger that her husband is cheating on her? Do you let the buyers of your home know they’re paying too much? While lying is never going to feel good, sometimes the best and smartest thing you can do is simply keeping your mouth shut and minding your own business.

4. David Kalakaua (aka “The Merrie Monarch”)

2. Billboards 3. Sand

CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19) Loyalty is a no-brainer for a Leo or Scorpio. Capricorns, though, can sometimes get confused about what they owe the people they love. Would you, for example, give a flaky friend an excellent job reference, even if you wouldn’t actually hire them yourself? That’s loyalty—however, some Capricorns might think they owe the perfect strangers on the other end of the phone line more than their flawed but wellknown buddy. That’s a little backwards. That doesn’t mean you need throw all ethical considerations out the window; just make sure you’re cutting your friends as much slack as possible, and coming through for them in every way you can. Then you’ll have done your part. AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18) Once you’ve said and heard everything that needs to be said, there’s no point in continuing the discussion. However, some people will be only too happy to go round and round in circles forever if you let them. Don’t. Walk away. In time, the words will either sink in, or something else will change, and another exchange might have fruitful results. That’s not likely right now. It may feel a bit harsh, but if you’re certain nothing’s about to shift, it’s actually a kindness to cut things off. They’re not going to—so that’s now your job. PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20) It doesn’t matter what you’re looking for—love, a job, a new place to live. Here’s the problem with casting a wide net: You often get a “yes” before your top choice has weighed in, and are forced to choose between that pretty good bird in the hand and the awesome one still waiting in the bush—which may fly away before you catch it. Since you Pisces despise having to make decisions like these (and will often end up losing both opportunities through your indecision), I don’t think the wide net strategy is a good one. Instead, you should be baiting your hook and fishing where you’re most likely to catch that one fish you really want. You may never get it, it’s true—but you’ll never know unless you try. ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19) If you got a birthday gift you didn’t like, it’d be pretty darn arrogant and ridiculous to go to the giver and demand something “better.” Even if this week’s situation is much less obvious than that, the basic mechanic is similar—and making entitled demands would be just as petty and selfish. Therefore, don’t. Accept what’s given in the spirit with which it’s given, even if it’s “not enough,” different from, or inferior to what you were expecting. Oh, and for goodness’ sake, please remember to be grateful, or at least act as if you are.

APRIL 28, 2011 29

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REAL ESTATE FOR SALE MAKAWAO LIVING FOR THE PRICE OF KIHEI VILLAGES 2 bd/1 bath cottage with north shore views $198,888. Josh Jerman, Realtor (808) 283-2222 The Wailea Group LLC WWW.DEVELOPKIHEILAND.COM 3.24 acres with preliminary subdivision and SMA approval across from the ocean. $1,449,000 Josh Jerman, Realtor (808) 283-2222 The Wailea Group LLC MULTI-UNIT KIHEI INVESTMENT PROPERTY Rent amounts currently total $2925/month. Only $329,000. Josh Jerman, Realtor (808) 2832222 The Wailea Group LLC

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VACATION RENTALS CLEAN, AFFORDABLE Accommodations in our vacation rental from $69 per day. Call Toll Free Wailuku Guesthouse 877-9868270 or www.wailukuhouse.com

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RECYCLING HOUSEHOLD BATTERIES Recycle your nicad & alkaline household batteries on Maui, Molokai &Lanai. For locations Call Community Work Day 8772524 or go to HYPERLINK “http:// www.mauicounty.gov/recycle” www.mauicounty.gov/recycle GOT PAINT? Donate re-usable paint or pick up FREE paint at CWD. For more information call 877-2524. NEW: RECYCLE rock, concrete, asphalt, or dirt. Multiple spec products created by P.B. Sullivan Const., Inc. on site Mobile Crushing Service, 875-2833 ELECTRONICS RECYCLING Free drop off, Tues. & Sat. 9-1 Large loads call 573-4018 901 Lower Main St across from ILWU building.

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40 N. Market St. Wailuku, HI 242-8788

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